Work Text:
CONVERSATION: KEVIN, JOE, NICK AND THE BONUS JONAS
NASH: Alright you’re going to love this
JAMESON: am i
NASH: Maybe not
NASH: so you know how the girls had a night here
JAMESON: yes
JAMESON: get to the point nash
NASH: there was some rum involved
GRAYSON: Is anyone dead, bleeding, or currently in the hospital?
NASH: no
GRAYSON: Then what’s the problem?
JAMESON: you text like a karen
XANDER: Nash hesitates to tell you, so I shall!
XANDER: They got really drunk.
NASH: …
NASH: Y’all have been quiet for a while
NASH: I’m not afraid of a fight
NASH: I have Oren
GRAYSON: Oren won’t help.
JAMESON: they’re not hurt, jfc calm down loverboy
JAMESON: how much is really drunk?
NASH: like a lot.
NASH: Avery and Max kept drinking after Libby stopped
NASH: they’ve gone through a lot of bottles.
XANDER: Avery recited Shakespeare off the top of her head
JAMESON: do you know which one
XANDER: A Midsummer’s Night Dream
XANDER: The queen’s monologue
JAMESON: omg she was learning it last week for that lit course
NASH: Gotta say
NASH: if this whole inheritance thing stops working out
NASH: she has a future in theater.
GRAYSON: From one solo?
NASH: hey she and Lyra got a pretty good recital of Hamlet in
NASH: they sound better than you do when you’re sober
JAMESON: i think gray might cry lmfao
GRAYSON: I’m not.
Jameson’s favorite thing (person) in the world was Avery Kylie Grambs.
That being said, he had no idea how to handle the woman while she was drunk. And in denial.
“Look, I’ve walked in a straight line, and … and I got back home fine. I’m not thaaaaat drunk.”
Jameson looked at Avery, who has tucked herself into his side. “Oren drove you here, and that line was definitely not straight.”
“It was …” she mumbled. She tried to take a few steps by herself, and fell over against Jameson, who wrapped an arm around her torso to steady her.
“Jesus Christ, how much did you drink?” Avery had a pretty high tolerance for alcohol, and her liver probably died three times over for her to be this drunk.
“I’m not Jesus, I’m Saint Avery, remember?” Her voice slurred as they reached the stairs. Avery tried moving, but she tripped on the first stair and nearly brought Jameson down with her.
Okay, that plan is out the window. Jameson hooked an arm around her legs, and lifted her in a bridal carry, walking away from the stairs.
“Where’re we going?” her words were basically mush at this point, but Jameson was able to make them out.
“Your room is pretty high up, Heiress, and we are taking the shorter route.” He stopped at a random point in a hallway, and tapped it three times. The wall slid away, and revealed an elevator.
Jameson put Avery down, and half-pushed her into the elevator. He clicked the button for her floor, and kept her within his arms as the elevator. It was a pretty short ride, but the sudden stop (which was pretty smooth) caused Avery to lose what little balance she had, and nearly fall over.
Jameson saved her from an encounter with the floor. Again.
She was still putting her full weight on him, so he picked her up again.
As they were walking to her room, she started giggling.
“What’s so funny?”
“You!”
Jameson had no idea what she was talking about. “What?”
Avery giggled again. “Like that. You’re funny. And pretty. Like really pretty.”
Jameson nudged at the side of her head with his nose. “Just pretty?”
“Yeah. Really pretty.” She rested her head against his chest.
“I thought you’d say I’m sexy.”
“That too.”
As soon as she reached her bed, she fell asleep. She was already in pjs, and it didn’t seem worth waking her up again to get fully ready for bed.
Jameson, who had been in bed fiddling with a puzzle Xander gave him, had already been in ‘sleep mode’ for the past hour. After making sure Avery was underneath a blanket and wasn’t about to fall off the bed, throw up, choke on said throw up or all three, he got in beside her, and was surprised that Avery promptly attached herself to his side.
“You’re not really asleep, are you, Heiress?” He asked with a smirk.
She pulled him closer. “I … love you.”
Jameson gave an amused smile and dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “I love you too.”
She didn’t respond, and Jameson figured she was truly asleep.
“Good night, Avery.”
Avery woke up the next morning- and ran straight to the bathroom.
Jameson was sitting on the counter next to the sink, as if he had been waiting there, but she barely acknowledged him as she bent over the toilet. He held her hair back as she threw up, and rubbed circles in her back. His touch was gentle, and Avery would've appreciated it more if she hadn't been spilling the contents of her stomach into the toilet.
“Good morning, Heiress.” he said with a smirk once she was done.
She shot him a glare, but quickly looked away as her head began pounding. “Don’t even try.”
“I didn’t say anything.” He joined her on the floor, placing a kiss on her temple, and offered her a bottle of water.
She began to drink it, and felt her headache ease somewhat. She leaned into Jameson and closed her eyes, taking a minute to relax and allow herself to slow down. With the nausea out of the way, she felt closer to sleep than ever.
She checked the clock on the wall. 9:45.
It was still too early for her.
"Woah." Jameson tapped her hand. "You're not sleeping until you've had something to eat."
"What?"
Jameson shrugged. "You're probably going to throw up again when you wake up, you might as well have something to throw up instead of pure stomach acid. You're lucky you ate before drinking last night, otherwise you would be in significantly worse shape."
She opened her mouth to respond, but she felt her stomach turn, and quickly dove for the toilet. Jameson held her hair back as she threw up bile, and kept dry heaving. She almost collapsed against the toilet and felt Jameson tie her hair and walk out of the bathroom. Avery wondered if she was in such bad shape that he couldn’t even be around her.
Avery tried to move, but her vision went temporarily black as she got up, and she wobbled for a second before catching the countertop. "Ow."
“How much did you end up drinking last night?” Jameson re-entered the bathroom and helped her sit on the countertop, giving her a bottle.
That’s why he left.
Avery noticed it was Gatorade rather than water and raised an eyebrow.
“You need the extra hydration, don’t look at me like that.”
Avery would’ve rolled her eyes. She instead decided to open the Gatorade bottle, but lacked the energy to actually open it.
“And she said she didn’t drink at all last night.” Jameson gave her a smirk -oh god, how could he be hot and helpful and unhelpful so early in the morning?- and helped her tip the bottle into her mouth.
She finally found the strength to talk. “Did I really say that last night?”
“Among other things.” He stood between her legs, and gently took the bottle from her, capping it as he moved it to the side.
Avery poked his chest. “What else did I do?”
Jameson gave her a crooked grin. “Finish the food.”
Food?
He produced a packet of crackers out of nowhere, and Avery groaned. “They’re disgusting.”
“They’re what you’re least likely to throw up.”
Avery frowned, and Jameson tore open the packet. “Take it from a Hawthorne man; we know the best ways to get drunk, and the best ways get over a hangover.”
He fed her a cracker, which was bland and flavorless, but the thought of any other food made her want to throw up.
Avery got halfway through the packet before she felt drowsy again. She didn’t realize it until she felt a series of gentle taps on her hand.
“Just one more, Heiress.” Avery was leaning almost entirely on Jameson, her head in the crook of his neck.
Avery tried to respond, but she was almost fully asleep, and Jameson took it as an answer. “Alright, you’re too sleepy for this, let’s get you to bed.”
He lifted her off the countertop almost effortlessly, and gently placed her on her bed. He kissed her forehead. He might’ve said something, but sleep washed over Avery, and anything he said was long gone.
DIRECT MESSAGES TO: GRAYSON HAWTHORNE
JAMESON: how drunk did the girls get
JAMESON: even i never got hungover this bad jfc
GRAYSON: I couldn’t tell you.
GRAYSON: She’s stubborn as ever.
GRAYSON: She won’t even eat food.
GRAYSON: She also says that she’s not drunk.
JAMESON: she’s not tho????
JAMESON: she’s hungover??
JAMESON: don’t tell me you’ve been telling ur girl shes drunk.
GRAYSON: Don’t tell Xander.
GRAYSON: Or Avery.
JAMESON: lmfao i just got avery back into bed
JAMESON: try harder
GRAYSON: She just ran to the bathroom.
JAMESON: have fun
She ended up waking up about two hours later with a blinding headache-
“-And that’s what the painkillers are for.” Jameson sat on the edge of the bed and handed her two pills and a glass of water. She quickly gulped down the pills and all of the water, and she felt relief wash over her about five minutes later.
“Jesus Christ.” She moved closer to Jameson and leaned her head against his shoulder.
“How are we feeling, Heiress?” She looked up at him and he flashed her a smile.
“A lot better now. How are you so patient?”
His eyebrows rose. “I’m not.”
“You knew exactly what to do.”
“That comes from a combination of regularly having gotten hangovers, and being a Hawthorne.” He gestured wildly with his arms. “Efficiency is key.”
She bit back a laugh as Jameson talked about his ‘process’ and how many tries it took him to perfect the hangover routine.
“-so you got the better end of the deal, you hopefully will never have to experience a true, raw hangover.”
“Thank you.” Jameson looked down at her and she shrugged. “You didn’t have to help. It was pretty gross.”
“Anytime, Heiress. And I’ve seen gross. I lived with Grayson.”
Avery swallowed. “We woke you up last night as well, and I didn’t plan on getting drunk at all. You were completely unprepared.”
Jameson’s eyebrows flew into his hair. “If you ever meet an unprepared Hawthorne, please disinherit them.”
When Avery didn’t laugh, he sighed. “It’s okay, Heiress. We all drink a little too much sometimes, and no one goes out planning to get wasted. We have a whole shelf in the pantry with ‘hangover-safe food.’ It’s not a burden to help you, and it’s never a bad thing to spend more time with you.”
Avery opened her mouth to argue back and Jameson clapped a hand over her mouth. “I will always be there for you, whether you like it or not. It’s not a bad thing.”
She felt her breath catch in her throat, and she paused for a minute before she spoke. “Alright.”
He flashed her a smirk. “It is also fun not being the one drunk for once.”
She rolled her eyes and Jameson wrapped an arm around her. “Brilliant. Now do you want to see whether Lyra finally stopped arguing with Grayson?”
“Oh, she never does.”
“Today might be different.”
“How so?”
“She’s hungover for one thing …”
GRAYSON: Where did they get the alcohol again?
JAMESON: avery’s asking if Lyra’s okay.
GRAYSON: She’s sleeping.
JAMESON: gray it’s like 1pm
JAMESON: why did it take you so long to get her to rest.
GRAYSON: Apparently, Lyra has a severe distaste for all things involving alcohol.
GRAYSON: How did Avery get her drunk?
JAMESON: she says Max did it.
GRAYSON: I shouldn’t have expected anything less.
GRAYSON: I thought I was done with hangovers when you stopped drinking.
JAMESON: and then you decided to fall in love
JAMESON: this is not my fault
GRAYSON: she’s waking up.
GRAYSON: Maybe I’ll finally sleep.
JAMESON: that’s what you get for not sleeping when people do
GRAYSON: I’m not going to grace that with a response.
GRAYSON: Goodbye, Jamie.
JAMESON: you’re not going off to war jfc dont sound so sad
JAMESON: well, you kinda are
GRAYSON: … I’ll pass on the sentiment to Lyra
JAMESON: he didn’t mean that -Avery
JAMESON: I did.
JAMESON: see you later.