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We have redone this scene five times. I'm unable to focus on my lines and a few of my costars have asked me if I'm doing okay. I just tell them ‘I’m fine, I must be tired’. It’s not like I can say ‘The sound of everyone's heartbeat is overwhelming and I haven been able to feed in the last week’.
It's surprising I have made it this far as an actor being a vampire. I’m unable to feed regularly due to my fame. Having to be extra careful of how I go about getting my meals. My self control is slipping the longer I'm around people.
Human blood is the most filling and can hold me over the longest if I have about two cups worth, lasting me about two to three days. Animal blood, not so much two cups of blood from a deer lasts me less than a day. I usually keep jars of blood handy but ran out and have been unable to get more having been filming everyday this week.
“Cut! Let's take a break and come back in an hour and reshoot this.” The director calls out.
Groans and sighs can be heard throughout the set. Grabbing my bag I head to the exit. Getting away from everyone for a while will help me control my hunger. I don't know how much longer I can go before I lose control and hurt someone.
When I get to my trailer I lock the door behind me. Throwing my bag on the table. I growl in frustration, clenching my fists. Anger shoots through my veins. Yelling, I swing and punch the wall. “Why can’t I control this better? I just need to get through this scene then I can find a decent enough meal.”
I freeze when I hear a knock at the door. Then a voice calls out “ Y/N? Are you doing okay, can I come in please?”
“Shit, It’s Tom.” I mumble. “One moment.” I call out.
Going to the door I pause, taking a deep breath. Swinging the door open I ask. “Hey what's up, do you need something?” As the words leave my mouth I’m hit with his scent. Causing me to double over in pain.
“Y/N are you okay?” Tom asks, rushing to my side, the door closing behind him. Placing his hand on my shoulder causing me to tense up.
“I’m fine, please I just need to be alone.” I groan. Drool pooling in my mouth. “Please, before I lose control.” I beg tears forming in my eyes.
“What do you mean Y/N? Let me help you.” He says moving his hand from my shoulder to rub my back.
Feeling my fangs forming I grip my thighs, my knuckles going white. “Please Tom, I don't want to hurt you.” I whimper, slowly losing control over myself.
“You wont hurt me Y/N what are you talking about?” Tom questions his hand still rubbing up and down my back.
Everything that happens next happens so fast I don't even notice I moved until Tom was under me with my nose to his neck breathing in his scent. Drool drips from my mouth onto his neck.
“You smell so good.” I moan breathing him in more my brain fogging up like I'm intoxicated. My teeth run along his neck scraping softly over his skin where his blood is held.
It hits me what I just said. Jumping up I backup, not looking at him I speak. “I’m sorry, please leave before I hurt you.”
I hear Tom get up from the floor. My cheeks heat up with shame as I think about how I almost bit him like a wild animal. What shocks me is that he doesn't leave but he walks up to me.
Once he is right in front of me I see his hand reach to my face. I move away a little, making him freeze before grabbing my face softly tilting it to look at him. He rubs his thumb over my lip lifting it to look at my teeth.
I gasp softly as he runs the tip of this thumb over my fang. “What are you doing Tom?” I mumble around his thumb.
“Have you always had fangs or am I just noticing them?” he asks
“I - I've had them, they are just not out all the time.” I mumble as he removes his thumb from my mouth.
He looks at me intently, clearly thinking about something. I can see the question in his eyes. Before he can ask I say. “I’m a monster.”
“A monster? Is that what you think about yourself?” he replies. “Is this way you are struggling so much with these scenes the last couple days, You are hungry?” he asks.
As he says the last words he cups my cheek with his palm. Moving my head so that I’m looking up at him. Then he asks me “When was the last time you had something to eat?”
Looking up at him my eyes glaze over as his scent fills my nose again. Drool pools in my mouth once more. “About a week ago was when I had my last meal.” I confess then quickly begging. “Please leave before I lose control.”
He just looks down at me a moment longer but what he says next stuns me. “You can feed from me.”
I gasp. “No Tom I can't. I don't think I can control myself if I were to drink from a human. I keep blood stored in bottles. I haven't fed off a living person in years, it won't be safe.”
“Darling I trust you. You need blood to function and clearly a week is too long to go without it. Please let me help you.” He pleads.
In a moment of clarity I back away from him. Giving me space to think clearly, before I sink my teeth into him. “I can’t. It’s too dangerous even you being here now is risking your life.” I say.
He takes a step toward me ignoring my warning. “Y/N please you are clearly in pain.” He states.
Irritation flows through me as he keeps persisting. “Tom, just stop okay. I will be fine. I can handle it like I always do.” I snap.
He stares at me stunted from my outburst. “I’m sorry. I-” I start to apologize before he cuts me off.
“Y/N it’s okay there is no need to apologize you are hungry and upset. I get you are scared but please take my help. I know I don’t fully understand what I’m offering but I am willing to do it if that means you are okay.” He says.
As the last of his words fell from his lips my wall crumbled and myself control lost to my hunger. “Fine, take a seat on the couch please.” I tell him.
I watch as he sits down getting comfortable. Waiting a moment to collect myself. Walking over to him till my knees touch his. “Okay Tom I’m going to sit in your lap and drink from your neck.” I tell him.
His cheeks flush from my statement but I don't tease him about it. As I move to sit on his lap his scent overwhelms me again. Once I'm comfortable I move my head down to his neck. Nuzzling his neck I sniff him, my brain going numb.
I lick his neck where I’m going to bite. “There is no going back, are you sure you want me to do this?” I question him before it’s too late.
He gulps at my question. “Yes I’m sure,” he confirms.
Licking his neck a few more times I take one more deep breath then sink my teeth into him. Blood overwhelms my mouth as it floods my throat. I moan at the taste. Like toast and honey, sweet and warm.
I feel him shiver under me as I continue to drink. Swallow after swallow my hunger fades. I hum into his neck at the feeling but unable to stop myself from drinking more.
I feel him go slightly limp under me. “Y-Y/N” he whimpers, his hands going to my waist.
His plea snaps me out of drinking him dry. Removing my teeth from him I lick his wound clean. “You taste absolutely delicious.” I mumble my words kind of slurred from being blood drunk.
As I come back to reality I freeze realizing what I have done. “Shit, are you all right? I know I couldn't control myself.” I question. Jumping off his lap I lay him back on the couch so he is more comfortable.
Looking down at him I see he has lost some of the color in his face. “Wait here a moment.” I tell him.
Rushing into the small bathroom in the trailer I wet a washcloth. Back at the couch I place it over his forehead. “Tom, please tell me you are okay.” I beg.
His eyes are closed and his breathing is slow. “I’m okay darling.” he says softly.
Guilt fills me as I watch him. I shouldn't have allowed him to do this. In this state he won't be able to do our scenes. Grabbing my phone I check how much time we have before we have to be back to set.
Seventeen minutes, that's not enough time for him to recover. I message the director telling him I have a stomach bug and can't shoot for the rest of the day. Not wanting this to affect Tom.
I put my phone back not waiting for a response. “I told the director I have a stomach bug so that will give you time to recover.” I mumble to him kneeling down next to him.
He chuckles softly. Grabbing my hand he rubs my knuckles. “A stomach bug?” he repeats.
A small smile forms on my lips as he always finds a way to laugh in the worst situations. “It's the only thing I could think of.” I respond
Looking at him I can't help but think of how beautiful he is but his stomach grumbling brings me out of my thoughts. “Let me get you something to eat.” I say
Walking over to the cupboards I open a few trying to find something for him to eat. Finally finding some granola bars, grabbing a cup I fill with water. Bringing it back over to him I have him sit up, so he doesn't choke on it.
Handing him the granola bars I let him take a few bites before handing him the water. “I’m sorry I should have been more careful.” I apologize.
He looks at me once he finishes the water. “It’s alright I’m glad you are feeling better.” he says. Before I can reply he asks. “How did you become a Vampire?”
Taking the cup from him I respond. “I was born like this, my mom was human but my dad is a vampire. It's not like the movies, clearly we can reproduce but it's a lot harder than humans. More so if it's two vampires.”
Tom munches on his granola humming at my answer. “Are you feeling a little better now?” I ask.
He nods, swallowing more granola. “I feel a little weak, nothing a good nap won't fix.” he answers.
Sleep would be good I think but I don't want him to use more energy than necessary. “You can use my bed, it would be best just so I can keep an eye on you.” I tell him.
Helping him sit up making sure he doesn't get too dizzy I help him to the bed in the back on the trailer. “I will be on the couch if you need me.” I say.
Once he is under the covers he looks back at me. “Y/N you can sleep here too Y/N there is enough room.” He replies.
He is just so kind but he has done enough for me tonight. “It’s okay I can sleep on the couch.” I tell him.
“I don’t mind truly love there is enough room for both of us on this thing.” He insists.
Seeing as there is no fighting about this I nod slipping into bed next to him. Curling up facing him “goodnight sleep well Tom” I whisper.
I hear him hum in reply. “You as well Y/N.”
I hear his heart beat slow, that's enough to calm my racing thoughts. Closing my eyes I drift to sleep. I feel the weight of his arms wrap around me just as my mind slips into darkness.