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It was the season before the world cup, every country had already chosen their team line up and they are currently in training. As most expected the world cup line up for Japan was almost all dominated by players made from blue lock. Blue Lock has been a successful project that brought a lot of attention worldwide with most of its players playing for world class leagues and showcasing formidable skills.
One of those popular and talented players, shidou ryusei was currently causing chaos in the field along with his teammates.
“YOU DAMN ANTENNA FREAK” Rin was losing his patience with that damn cockroach annoying him all the time.
“Uh-oh, it seems like I have angered the emo bitch” shidou grinned even more.
“STAY AWAY FROM ME BEFORE I MAKE YOU UNABLE TO PLAY IN THE WORLD CUP” karasu was down on the floor holding his stomach from laughing, this was a regular occurance in their chaotic team made originally from strikers. Isagi with all his grace sighed at the display and went to stop Rin before they got in a physical fight.
“Alright Rin, don't get too heated and let's go. You have to take a shower since you…” with a disgusted look isagi looked at rin's shirt, it was all drenched by juice, juice that shidou spilled over him. “Let's just go” isagi held his wrist and dragged him to the showers all along the way Rin was glaring at shidou looking like an angered puppy.
It was known by now that Rin listened to only two people, his brother and isagi Yoichi. So this cute display between isagi and him was also a normal occurrence by now, adding to the fact that Rin mellowed out over the years since his relationship with sae got better and they talked about what happened.
Now you might be thinking why didn't sae stop the fight instead of isagi, well that's because unlike what people think sae has a mischievous streak and is highly amused by shidou’s and rin's shenanigans, he calls it “some drama in my boring routine wouldn't hurt”. Basically he enjoys the chaos.
“My friends call me a loser
‘cause I am still hanging around”
Karasu was still cackling when shidou jumped on sae’s back and got thrown over.
“You're all sweaty demon, don't touch me” sae said as he went to the showers as well, he was one of the rare players that weren't from blue lock and got chosen for the line up.
Shidou pouted while sitting on the grass “but sae-chan~~~” he kept whining.
“Dude why are you still trying, he is clearly not interested” karasu joked with a smirk.
“He can't resist me, I will win him over” shidou said with a dramatic gesture and a hand on his heart.
“Plus I bet he likes my dick so much he would chok-” he was cut off by a ball to his face.
“SHUT UP YOU FREAK” it was of course Barou who said that.
Karasu kept laughing “you're so stupid, you should really find a new person already~”
Shidou hummed but didn't say anything, it's not like he doesn't know what the other means. Even though it is concealed as a joke, he knows first hand how many years shidou spent chasing sae’s love just to be let down over and over again. The fact that he is still on it seemed weird to everyone.
Karasu took that silence as a sign to stop, it seems he has failed once again to get shidou back on track.
_________________________
“I’ve heard so many rumors’
That I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch”
“Sae-chan~” shidou waved to sae from behind jiggling his keys, they were currently in the building’s parking lot. Sae turned around and stood still waiting for shidou to catch up.
“Wanna go together ?” Shidou grinned and sae nodded.
“Mine or yours ?” Sae thought for a minute “let's go to mine since it's closer” he settled for that.
“Oooohh~ ? So eager now aren't you~” sae simply walked faster and ignored shidou.
It has been 3 years since the two of them had this arrangement, ‘sex friends’ he called it. With no emotions involved, it seemed to be tearing down at shidou every time but he never managed to stop.
As they reached sae’s apartment, the moment they took off their shoes shidou took sae in a heated kiss, with sae’s back to the wall and shidou's hands wrapped around his face. He kissed him deeply.
Sae’s hands went around shidou’s neck desperate for more, shidou rubbed his tongue underneath sae’s knowing just how he likes it, sae was getting drunk on the kiss with his eyes rolling back.
Shidou’e leg went between sae’s legs and stimulated him even farther.
“You're already hard…” with a heavy voice, shidou teased sae. Sae just clinged More tightly asking for more.
Shidou picked up sae and took him to the bedroom, all while kissing. He had already memorized the way from the amount of times he had done it.
He threw him to the bed and took off both of their pants, sae’s dick rock hard, shidou circled around it then grabbed it.
“Hey…I wanna kiss here too” shidou said as he put it in his mouth in one go, sae gasped with his eyes wide open.
“Sh- ah! Shidou..” shidou kept sucking and it made sae go crazy “wait t-take..!” It didn't take much time for sae to come undone, drunk on the haze of it all.
“Did you prepare down there~ ?” Shidou asked suggestively and with a hummed tone sae nodded. Wasting no time, Shidou moved down and licked the rim of sae’s hole, eating him out.
Sae’s eyes welled up with unshed tears, his face and ears all flushed. “Ryu..sei- ah!” Oh ? We got to this point fast today.
Shidou pulled his tongue out and sae whined at the emptiness, shidou quickly inserted a finger. Usually I can't for the life of me figure out what he is thinking, but look at how he is being open now.
Shidou added a second finger and grinned at the way sae shuddered “ryusei! H- hold up..ah-!”
Shidou kissed him again, the kiss was filled with love and lust, at least from shidou's side..
“Put it in already you demon..” sae pulled away from the kiss with a desperate look in his eyes, one that shidou could only think how cute he is.
“Yes, master~” in one go he aligned his dick to sae’s entrance and slammed inside, sae let out a moan that could compare to a scream, his back all arched and his hands wrapped tightly around the blond’s neck.
“I’m going craz- ah” sae gasped at a certainly sharp hit to his prostate.
“I will keep you completely crazy for the rest of the night, sae-chan..” shidou said with heavy breaths, and he did keep his word.
Sae could say that that was one of the best nights of his life if it wasn't for the fact that he woke up feeling his muscles sore, even a day of training didn't get him this bad. Well at least he is clean, shidou had the decency to clean him up after their unholy practice at night.
“Oh ? You're already awake ?” Shidou opened the door and entered wearing bright pink pants and a white shirt. Too shiny was sae’s only thoughts, shidou’s blond hair was down not defying gravity anymore.
“Did you order breakfast ?” shidou nodded and Sae got up slowly from the bed, he took the suspiciously pink hoodie close to him and wore it. He approached the door as shidou leaned down for a kiss, sae ignored him and shidou pouted.
“How come you don't kiss me in the morning” he whined, sae stilled for a second “unnecessary..” he said as he walked away from shidou and went to the kitchen. He missed the way the taller man flinched and how his expression darkened, he hid it quickly with his usual devilish grin and followed sae to the kitchen.
The morning went by in a haze, they didn't have any morning practice today but shidou had to retrieve some stuff from the training center so he left.
When he went down the hallway to the lockers he overheard some of the staff talking. A girl in her mid 30’s that he recognized as someone from the PR team assigned said in a calm voice to a man beside her “by the way, what is the relationship between itoshi sae and shidou ryusei ? Nothing was mentioned about them dating but they seem so close” as she is involved with the PR team they know a lot of information about the players to manage the rumors accordingly and stuff, shidou perked up at hearing that and the man next to her replied “oh ? Those two are nothing nothing” he laughed “itoshi sae wouldn't be interested in him romantically, they are just hooking up from what I have heard” the woman made an ‘ohhhh’ sound and the man continued and shidou was getting pissed off more and more “let me tell you this, I overheard itoshi sae denying dating shidou when oliver aiku asked him about it. So this is a confirmation of my words” he shrugged at the end, and shidou stood still in his place with a grim expression.
Suddenly as if to cut the raging storm before it started, isagi’s cheerful voice came from the end of the hallway. He was waving with a big smile to shidou, seemingly unaware of what was happening “shidou-san!” At that, the two staff workers flinched and a scared expression came to the man’s face as shidou fixed him with a glare. He quickly bowed along with the woman and hurried off. Isagi had a confused expression on his face when he finally reached shidou “what's with these two…?” He tilted his head. Shidou dismissed him with a wave of his hand “nothing, there are just too many rats these days talking way too much” isagi didn't press further noticing the mood shidou was in.
Shidou headed to his apartment and went directly to his room. He was feeling so much anger and if it wasn't for the fact that he calmed down a bit in the last few years he would have already broken many things.
“This is with no emotions involved demon.”
“Unnecessary..”
“Itoshi sae wouldn't be interested in him romantically”
“FUCKING HELL” shidou snapped and pulled his hair, the words kept repeating in his head. He knew what he signed up for when he started the arrangement with sae, he knew what was waiting for him. And the worse thing about it is he could never deny those rumors, him and sae were nothing but mere sex Friends.
“SO WHAT, SO FUCKING WHAT AT LEAST I AM THE ONE WHO GETS TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT” he was getting more and more pissed off.
It’s not like sae is having anyone other than me at the moment, it's all a matter of time . This is how shidou calms himself down every time, knowing he is hanging on a thin thread waiting for the time he falls.
“Ahh fuck, I need to get my head off this” he took his phone and called some of the guys to hang out after afternoon practice. I’m gonna drink my heart out tonight.
__________________
“I thought you thought of me better’
Someone that you couldn't lose”
Some of the guys of the team went to a bar with high security exclusively for public figures, a regular spot for them to hang out and let loose for a while.
“Slow down shidou, you’re gonna drown the entire cup in one go” aiku said with a relaxed grin on his face.
Karasu laughed “let him let him, he is definyitely pissed off today” aiku laughed a bit along with him “noticed that today in practice he was on edge and didn't stick to sae as much as usual..” aiku’s eyes lingered on shidou for a bit and he tensed at hearing sae’s name.
“just shut up both of you and just enjoy the night..” shidou as he downed his nth cup this night.
Aiku’s eyes widened “no way..” karasu glanced at him “this really involves sae ?!” Karasu took a sip of his drink in amusement, in the corner of his eyes he saw otoya with some girls in the corner and then glanced back at shidou to see him fuming.
“Shut up! Go to hell!” Aiku just laughed “dude, you really need to let go, sae told me that you two are exclusively sex Friends with a no attachment rule” aiku put his cup down and made an ‘X’ gesture with his arms.
“Since I was intrigued I asked him what he would do if you ever stopped the arrangement and he just ignored me and then said ‘nothing’ with a stoic face” he imitated sae’s tone of talking. Shidou’s eyes widened a bit and karasu didn't miss the flash of hurt in his eyes. He clicked his tongue under his breath and put his hand on the shoulder of a laughing aiku and nudged him to stop “stop you’re getting drunk” aiku seemed to realize the look in shidou’s face and flinched “hey man-” shidou cut him off with a cold look “no you're right, this is fucking stupid” he said as he turned around to get another drink.
Karasu just sighed and took a sip of his own drink “we’re in for a real long night..” aiku chuckled exhaustively, “by the way, you might wanna go check with otoya, I feel like he is going to get slapped soon” karasu’s eyes widened and he muttered a quiet ‘fuck’ as he quickly went otoya’s way.
Shidou wasn't really surprised by what he heard from aiku, it wasn't a new thing really so why the fuck was it affecting him today ? What's wrong with him this week? He swears he never was this emotional before, so what if sae doesn't care about him ? So what if he barely cares about what might happen to him ? To them ? Was this any news for him ? That he is just a nobody in sae’s eyes that came at the right time and was compatible with him in bed.
Shidou chuckled bitterly under his breath, I'm just a fucking sex toy for that bastard.
________________________
“you said, “we’re not together”
So now when we kiss, I get anger issues”
The hangover did hurt like a bitch, he woke up in his apartment thankfully. Probably aiku or karasu brought me here. He went to get some hangover meds he keeps in the kitchen and when his headache got better he noticed his phone blowing up with notifications, when he checked his expression darkened and his headache seemed to come back even stronger.
“What THE FUCK ?!” All his friends texted him to check Twitter, hell any social platform was talking about it.
POPULAR FOOTBALL PLAYER ITOSHI SAE SPOTTED ON A ROMANTIC DINNER WITH POPULAR ACTRESS ##### #######
Shidou laughed, he laughed loudly as he pulled his hair tightly “are you fucking kidding me sae?” There was a reason shidou had even a bit of hope that he and sae had something, it was the fact that sae wasn't involved with anyone but him this whole three years they were together.
Shidou looked more in the articles and the pictures put by the media, usually he would dismiss it as just rumors or good editing of just a simple meeting by coincidence but this time they had a clear shot of a ‘passionate’ kiss right outside the restaurant.
Shidou threw his phone to the floor, he is sure that it's broken hearing the loud crack that echoed through the room.
“I will need stronger meds if I want to live this headache down” he put his hand to his face, he is sure that right now his teammates are trying to reach him if the concerned messages he got sent by most of them before is any indication. Hell, even Rin had sent a text, a simple ‘did you check Twitter dumbass ?’ this whole situationship is ridiculous, shidou kept wondering what his next step would be now that he knew he is not the only one, that he is just an option of multiple others. I am not important.
Fortunately for shidou, it's the weekend so he doesn't have to bother with sending a notice to the assistant coach about skipping practice.
He holed up in his room for two days which is extremely unusual for him, by the end of the second day a loud knocking that just didn't seem to stop came by his door.
He opened the door without checking who it was and was surprised to find sae “the hell ?” The shorter male simply said. Isn't that what I am supposed to say ?? Not you ??
“Why do you look like that, no in fact why the fuck weren't you replying to my calls or texts ?” Sae didn't stop or wait for permission and just went inside the apartment.
He sat on the couch as he waited for a reply from the blonde man “what are you doing here?” Shidou’s voice was cold but with an unmistakable edge to it.
“I asked first” sae simply said and shidou sighed “my phone is broken that's it and I am just not in the mood” he was still standing next to the couch, sae crossed his legs as he relaxed into the couch more.
“Broken ? How ?” He stared at shidou's form, it was so wrong. He had dark under eyes, his hair was down and disheveled. His clothes looked messy ? It was so not him.
“Details don't matter, now what are you doing here ?” sae didn't reply, he just stood up and pulled Shidou into a kiss, he caught him off guard and Shidou almost gave in till a flash of the article and the pictures came to his mind. He pushed sae slightly and pulled from the kiss in fury.
“I’m not in the mood today, if this is all then please get out” he ran a hand over his hair and sae just stood still without saying anything.
“What happened ?” That ticked shidou off.
“None of your business now leave me alone” he said as he turned around to go back to his room, that was until sae stopped him by holding his wrist.
“Tell me.” Shidou chuckled bitterly at the tone “I don't have anything that obligates me to do so. We are not together” realization flashed on sae’s face and he let go from shidou’s wrist. Of course he did.
“Yeah..we’re not together. I will go now, text me when you want” he quickly made his way to the door without glancing back seemingly unaffected by what just happened, shidou's gaze lingered at the door and then he fell to his knees along with the wall with his face in his hands “fucking hell..what am I expecting”
____________________
“You said “baby no attachment”
But we’re knee deep in the passenger seat and you're eating me out
Is it casual now ?”
That night shidou’s memory flashed to how it started in the first place, a drunk “mistake” driven by lust, in sae’s car they hooked up and continued the night in his apartment. That day when they woke up sae stared blankly at him and said “it’s just casual with no emotions involved” and it broke something inside of shidou.
“Two weeks and your mom invites me to her house in Long beach
Is it casual now ?”
Back when shidou was with him last year on their family vacation, sae's parents invited him knowing that the two were close. Even Rin got used to seeing shidou with their parents from the sheer amount of time he was on their family’s occasions.
And yet… and yet, it's just “casual” for sae, it's just something that has no importance to him. All of this bullshit he kept up for 3 years, 3 fucking years of his life was just casual for him. All without emotions, hell sae is a champion at leading people on. 3 years of his life and yet he never considered shidou as someone important.
Shidou was fuming with angry tears on his hallway floor. “The heck am I still doing..”
______________________
“I know what you tell your friends
It's casual, if it's casual now
Then baby, get me off again
If it's casual, it's casual now”
Shidou didn't want to skip practice because of a stupid love affair that he has and because his 3 years long sex friend that he fell in love with long before just had a chick on the side which means that shidou is fucked, and he is an idiot stuck on a hope that would never come.
When they were training, everyone was walking on eggshells around him afraid of pissing him off seemingly noticing his red eyes.
He saw from the corner of his eyes isagi holding Rin back from approaching him which he is sure would have resulted in a big fight.
He avoided sae the whole practice, ego gave him a look but didn't say anything. Hah! Even ego knew about the situation, yet that asshole refuses to mention it.
At the end of practice he heard Aiku asking him about the article and sae didn't deem it as a big deal and just shrugged “just a one night stand”, everybody was focused on their conversation even though they tried to play it cool. Most of them glanced at Shidou to find him looking cold, unusual for the cheerful freaky demon they are used to. Well unexpected to them, shidou went to aiku’s and sae’s way.
“Sae-chan~ come with me for a little bit ?” Shidou tilted his head and mimicked a little smile that is anything but him, aiku stood there awkwardly while sae just stared a little bit before he moved along with shidou.
They went to the locker room and shidou closed the door as he slammed sae to the locker in a heated kiss.
“Sh- shidou wai-” he didn't let the other speak as he cornered him there. He let him breathe for a second as he said.
“A hotel.” Sae made a confused sound “let's go to a hotel today, alright ?” Sae fixed him with a stare trying to understand why shidou wanted to go to a hotel when both their apartments are free but nodded when he knew he was not getting his answer any time soon.
Shidou picked up both of their stuff as he threw sae’s jacket at him. “Let's shower there” sae was extremely confused, this was not the shidou he is used to but he didn't say anything further.
As they went to the hotel room, sae could just tell that something was off. He enjoyed what they did, the pleasure was unbearable, leaving him in a blessed state and if it wasn't for the tears that shidou shed in the middle of their act he wouldn't have noticed anything wrong at all.
He woke up in the morning, feeling sluggish. He picked himself up from the bed and noticed shidou sitting on the chair next to the hotel’s window.
Shidou glanced at him and noticed he was up, he softly smiled an expression so strange in shidou's face who always has a wide mischievous grin on his face.
“Let's stop this arrangement sae-chan” sae stopped his movement and looked at shidou with wide eyes.
“Huh ?” His voice almost broke.
“Dumb love, I love being stupid
Dream of us in a year
Maybe we’d have an apartment
And you'd show me off to your friends at the pier”
Shidou avoided his gaze and looked back at the window “you know, you already know that I loved you and that I wanted more right ?” Sae stayed silent on the bed and shidou chuckled “I always thought that we would end up together and end up sharing an apartment and living together!” He glanced back laughing “I thought there is no way you didn't consider me as a partner considering we have been together for 3 years…”
“No attachments..” shidou flinched at sae’s words and flinched even more at the horrified? Look in sae’s face.
He smiled again “right. Well I discovered this weekend, uh no not discovered but acknowledged! I always knew it but ignored it, you don't really care and you don't want to care so” shidou shrugged as if it's something he didn't cry at for more than 2 days “let's just stop this and move on our ways, you don't seem to have a problem since you already found new partners” he chuckled “don't even know if it was just this one time or you already had other sex Friends and I just didn't know”
“I-..” sae seemed to lack the words, well he didn't need to exactly say anything. It was just shidou expecting and putting his expectations on him.
“I know baby “no attachment””
“Don't worry I know, I have known for a long time now..we are just casual” his voice turned from soft to angry at that.
“But we’re
Knee-deep in the passenger seat and you're eating me out
Is it casual now ?
Two weeks and your mom invites me to her house in Long beach
Is it casual now ?
I know what you tell your friends
It's casual, if it's casual now
Then baby, get me off again
If it's casual, it's casual now
It's hard being casual, when my favorite bra lives in your dresser
And it's hard being casual
When I am on the phone talking down your sister
And I try to be the chill girl
That holds her tongue and gives you space
I try to be the chill girl
But honestly I am not.”
Sae looked up at him as shidou stood up from his seat “well since you are listening anyway, how about I tell you everything ?” He had a manic look on his face, mixed with hurt and anger and pain.
“I fucking tried to give you space time and time again and you always found a reason to avoid mentioning my feelings, you always fucking say no emotions involved and stuff but you give mixed signals and for what !? Just to lead me on ? Your parents think we are together for fuck’s sake, and I even tried to become ‘presentable’ and hold my tongue whenever I am with you in public even though that goes against what I am used to. I have done everything for you, so won't you tell me now ? What the hell did I lack !? No tell me what the fuck do you feel ?!” Angry tears fell from his eyes as he was yelling.
Sae’s breath hitched and he was still looking up from his position, he didn't know what to say, didn't know what to tell him. His silence irked shidou to no end and he just picked his bag up and slammed the door as he went out leaving sae alone in the room, the teal eyed man was still processing what shidou had told him.
“I fucked you in the bathroom, when we went to dinner
And your parents on the table, you wonder why I'm bitter ?
Bragging to your friends, I get off when you hit it
I hate to tell the truth but I am sorry dude you didn't
I hate that I let this drag so long, now I hate myself
Hate that I let this drag so long, you can go to hell”