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Yuuri took a deep breath of the warm ocean air as soon as he stepped onto the main deck of the ornate Golden Salmon. He loitered just outside the stuffy hall that led to the comfortably decorated cabin he and Wolfram were sharing. It was a really nice room – Saralegui pampered his guests with luxury and gracious hospitality (or at least Yuuri) – but repeatedly hearing his bedpartner spew his stomach contents into the soup pot - that Yuuri had requested from the kitchen - wasn’t his idea of a relaxing trip.
Yuuri had sat with him all evening when the seasickness had gotten really bad. He had rubbed the pretty prince’s back as he leaned over the soup pot and after wiped at his face. Yuuri had even gotten the idea to wrap a cool rag around Wolfram’s neck, which had seemed to actually maybe help a little bit. Wolfram was now asleep, softly snoring as he sprawled out on his side.
Yuuri stretched his arms over his head. The fresh air definitely felt heavenly after playing nurse for so long. It was hot and humid with a distinct tang of salt, but it filled his body with a sense of rejuvenation. He made his way over to the side of the ship to look out into the stark black water and matching sky.
It was less than a minute before Yuuri heard the shuffling of slippers against the wood of the deck. Saralegui was approaching from the hall. He had a silky lavender robe pulled tight around his body and cinched at his waist by a silk belt. One of his pretty, delicate hands covered his mouth as he yawned, and then he waved a sleepy but cute hello after.
“Is your friend feeling better?” He asked with a hum.
“I guess so. Wolf was able to fall asleep, so hopefully he’ll feel better tomorrow.” Yuuri doubted it, though; they were still on a ship.
“That’s nice.”
Sara had come to stand so close to Yuuri that their arms were touching. The other king placed his hands on the banister alongside and looked out to the sea.
“I love how black the sea looks at night. It makes the world feel so empty.”
Sara sighed and Yuuri felt the little distance between their stances close even more as Sara fully leaned against him, even going so far as to rest his head on Yuuri’s shoulder. He smelled good, some sweet heavily floral perfume with a scent Yuuri couldn’t place.
“I actually kinda think it feels a little lonely.” Yuuri replied.
Saralegui hummed. “I think that’s because you have a kind heart, Yuuri.”
Yuuri chuckled, embarrassed. He felt a blush creep onto his cheeks.
“Lately, though, I think I’ve started to look at it a little differently, too. The depth and darkness resemble your eyes. I feel like I could get lost staring at it for hours.”
“O-oh? Really?”
Yuuri’s heart started to speed up. Sara was such a pretty boy, and he gave his compliments and affections so freely to Yuuri that it was easy for Yuuri’s head to start to spin and fill with fluff. He was so sweet and so soft. It was… different than what he was used to.
Saralegui turned abruptly towards Yuuri. He took both of Yuuri’s hands into his own and clasped them gently. His skin was so smooth, and his hands felt cold. Yuuri gripped them back, secretly wishing he could warm them up. Sara dipped his eyes down, looking bashful, but a smile played on his thin lips.
“I have a confession to make to you, Yuuri.”
A confession? Yuuri felt his mouth go dry. His heart tremored as alarm spread through his body. Sara raised his eyes, meeting Yuuri’s gaze directly.
“I like you.”
“Ah…”
He really should have seen this coming shouldn’t he? Saralegui’s confession made all of his actions up until now fall into place so perfectly. All Yuuri could do was gape dumbly, his hands going slack in Sara’s hold. Really though, could Yuuri have been this dumb? This confession didn’t even come as a shock. Maybe Yuuri just didn’t want to admit the fact that Sara had been hitting on him all this time. The gentle touches and frequent hugs. The overzealous attention and affection. Yuuri swallowed thickly. He hadn’t necessarily minded it, either… but then again, he had been operating under the assumption that all Sara had wanted was to be friends. And… it had been nice. Sara was sweet, and he was gorgeous. Maybe Yuuri was guilty of indulging in that attention a little. But could he really be blamed for being so weak? He tried to assuage his responsibility, but it did nothing to ease the guilt that was quickly filling his chest heavy like lead.
“I’m really flattered, Sara,” Yuuri gently pulled his hands away from the other, and Saralegui’s hopeful smile disintegrated at a rate that made Yuuri wish he could bite his tongue. “but I can’t return your feelings. I’m really sorry. Really. If I lead you on in any way… well, you can hate me all you want for that. But if you still want to, I really would like to be friends.”
He wanted to close his eyes against the hurt that was cloaking Sara’s pretty eyes and dragging down his feminine eyebrows, but he believed a real man had to face his mistakes head on.
“W-why?” Sara asked. His voice was shaking.
Oh, please don’t cry.
Yuuri wanted to grab ahold of Sara’s hands again to comfort him, but that would probably send the wrong message.
“It’s not anything wrong with you, I swear. I just can’t feel that way about another guy, Sara.”
Something about the excuse he gave felt hollow, but Yuuri ignored it. Now was not the time.
Sara’s brows knit together, and his lips pursed thinly. A flash of some emotion that looked like anger to Yuuri lit in his eyes.
“How can you know that?”
“Wha-? W-well, I just do! I like girls!” Yuuri hated how weak his voice came out.
Sara’s mouth twitched down into a frown. Before Yuuri could even process what was happening, the space between them disappeared completely.
“Wh-!”
Yuuri couldn’t even finish his exclamation. Sara’s mouth was already over his own. He froze in shock against the eager ministrations of Sara’s lips, mind balking with something like horror when he felt
Sara’s wet tongue slide against his bottom lip.
God must really hate him, even if Yuuri had nothing to do with God.
Because at that moment, to make the situation a million times worse, a painfully familiar voice called his name.
“Yuuri?”
Yuuri’s arms surged forward and grabbed Saralegui by the shoulders, gripping him tightly and pushing him off, but it was already too late.
Wolfram was standing right outside the hall.
The prince’s eyes were wide in shock, delaying the anger and hurt, but not long enough. Yuuri saw them well up, taking the place of tears.
“Wolf!”
Yuuri never expected Wolfram to turn away. He thought he would yell, scream, even slap him. But instead, he turned away without a word back down the hall he had just come from.
“Yuuri!”
He ignored Sara’s call as he ran after Wolf. He felt a swell of anger at the other king, but he pushed it down easily. The only feelings he had room for were for Wolfram.
“Wolf!” He called as he raced to catch up to him. “Wolfram! Wait! Please!”
Wolfram didn’t hesitate even a second, as if he was so determined to ignore Yuuri he had really stopped hearing him. He opened the door to their cabin without even glancing at him.
Yuuri caught the door before it could close and slipped inside. He shut it behind him, a little harder than he meant to. He was shaking.
“Wolfram, please listen to me!” Yuuri’s voice trembled. “Sara kissed me! I didn’t want him to!”
Wolfram finally acknowledged Yuuri and turned to face him. Yuuri felt his heart drop down to is stomach. Wolf’s beautiful face was scrunched up in pain. His emerald eyes swam with tears. A mix of anger and sorrow. Yuuri felt like an arrow had hit him right in the heart. The room spun.
He never wanted to see Wolfram with that expression ever again.
“I swear Wolfram…”
Yuuri voice was cracking at the edges. A swell of emotion threatened to take his breath away, and for a second he was afraid that he was going to start crying, too.
Yuuri suddenly felt as though a chasm was about to rip apart the floor he was standing on.
And that this time, Wolfram wouldn’t catch him.
“Please, believe me…” Yuuri pleaded.
A couple of tears spilled over Wolfram’s cheeks.
“…But you like him. Even if he’s the one who kissed you, I see how you are with him, Yuuri. You think he’s attractive. You smile at him all the time. You let him touch you.”
Yuuri couldn’t outright refute everything Wolfram said, but the frustration he felt was purely at himself.
“I don’t like him! I wanted to be his friend, I really did, and he was nice to me, so I wanted to be nice back. And, yeah, he’s a weirdly pretty guy, but that doesn’t mean I like him! All the men here are unnaturally pretty!” And besides, you’re even more beautiful than he is!
“I don’t like him.”
Standing here in front of Wolfram, Yuuri had never been more certain of those words.
Wolfram sighed shakily, but his breathing had been steadying as Yuuri spoke. He knew Yuuri was telling the truth. Yuuri could see the hurt start to break away like the sun through a storm. He sniffled one last time and wiped at his eyes, grimacing now for having cried at all. Yuuri felt dizzy with relief.
“I believe you, but…”
Wolfram still had to ask one last question, but it may have been the most damning of them all for Yuuri.
“Why don’t you like him, then?”
Yuuri gulped. Wolf was no longer asking out of anger or pain. His sharp gaze looked right through to Yuuri. He’d been getting so much better at reading Yuuri without even saying a word. Yuuri felt pinned to the bottom of that green lake within Wolfram’s eyes.
“I-w-well, well, he’s a guy… y’know.”
Wolfram raised an eyebrow at his lame excuse.
“You’re engaged to a guy, y’know.”
Yuuri wanted to laugh at Wolfram’s adoption of earth lingo, but he knew it would just make the other mad again.
“Y-yeah I am…” Yuuri said.
He had nothing to say against that.
Wolfram’s expression softened for a second, but it quickly scrunched up again in a scowl.
“That damn Saralegui…” Wolfram growled. He was still clearly angry, but at least it wasn’t with Yuuri. “That bastard thinks he can go around kissing other men’s fiancés! I should challenge him to a duel! He’s clearly never been in a battle in his life; I could cut him in half easily…”
“Whoa, whoa! Calm down, Wolf! You can’t just go around trying to kill people…” He really shouldn’t have to say that.
“The only reason I’m not is because it could start a war between our countries.” Wolfram crossed his arms. “Though, if you weren’t such a flirt this wouldn’t have happened in the first place.”
“Hey! I told him I wasn’t interested, and he kissed me anyway. I’m the victim here.” Yuuri defended himself.
Wolfram’s eyes flashed. “Then I really should cut him in half.”
Seeing Wolf’s lust for revenge come back drained the last bit of energy Yuuri felt he had left. He let out a sigh and felt his back sag under the weight.
“Come on, Wolf… Can you forget about beating up Saralegui and lay back down? I’m really tired, too, so why don’t we go to sleep?” Yuuri was ready to get on his knees and start begging.
Wolf let out a very displeased huff, resting a hand on his hip and tilting his chin up, but he conceded anyway. “…Fine, we can go to bed.”
Yuuri let out a sigh of relief. He made his way to the side of the bed, and the two turned their backs to each other and began to dress for bed. Yuuri wore his favorite pale blue pajama set – the least elaborate one that was offered to him when he had first settled down in Shin Makoku. When he turned back around Wolfram was patting down the skirt of a peach-colored nightgown Yuuri had seen many times. It was less frilly and longer than the other ones he sometimes wore to bed. Tonight, Yuuri was grateful for that.
The two settled down. As usual, Wolf was quick to make himself comfortable and close his eyes. He was on his side with his face half-sunk into the pillow, clutching a corner within his arms. He was always capable of falling asleep right away, but Yuuri never had it that easy.
“Hey, Wolfram?” Yuuri whispered.
Yuuri turned over in the bed so that he was facing Wolf.
Wolf opened up one eye. Even in the dark, Yuuri could see how strikingly green it was.
“What is it?”
“I really am sorry about what happened.”
“It’s not your fault.” Wolfram replied.
“I know… But still… I know it really hurt to see that.”
Wolfram was silent.
Yuuri felt like his mouth was full of cotton. He fumbled around for the words in his head before he even tried to speak.
“Do you… um… I mean…” He felt stupid asking for this. Why was it so hard to just be honest about this stuff?! “Dammit…”
Sometimes saying nothing is the easiest thing to do.
Yuuri reached out and wrapped an arm around Wolfram. He heard the other gasp, but it was quickly muffled against his neck when he pulled Wolf close. Yuuri felt his warm breath against his skin and Wolf’s arm slide around his back to hold him back.
“Is this okay?”
Yuuri’s lips were pressed against Wolfram’s soft hair. His words were muffled, but Wolfram nodded anyway.
Yuuri’s hand trailed up and down Wolfram’s back. He could feel the muscles contract as he brushed past them. Yuuri wondered if maybe it tickled, but Wolfram said nothing against it. Gradually, the subtle movements of Wolfram’s body ceased, and his breathing slowed against Yuuri’s neck. His chest rumbled gently against Yuuri’s as he snored.
“Goodnight, Wolf.” Yuuri whispered. His lips were brushing against Wolfram’s forehead.
Yuuri had never slept with someone in his arms before. It was warm.