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Or the relative lack of it.
Levi paced around the room, unsure of what to do with himself. He had patrolled, he had checked the weapons, hell, he had even done a little gardening.
Where was she? Earlier in the day she had accompanied him on patrol, softly smiling as they walked the length of the gorge together. After that, she had gone into her tower and disappeared.
Had she gone to sleep? No, it was too early, and the sun was still up. She didn't really nap, unless she was feeling sick, and even then she would drag herself every so often outside just to have a look.
He went out to the watchtower balcony, making use of the viewer that had been his means of communication (his lifeline) for the past weeks. He swiveled the hefty machine from side to side, top to bottom, but did not find Drasa. It was odd. Ever since they had first made contact, they implicitly made a point of being in each other’s sight, checking in and talking every day.
Perhaps the bathhouse? Levi swiveled the viewer again, but the tower obscured most of the construction. He grabbed the binoculars resting on the table and leaned over the railing, trying to peer from the side if she was in there. She had a tendency to take longer showers. Levi swallowed. He had seen her come out a few times in nothing more than a towel- a towel that covered her disappointingly well.
But not entirely.
He looked to his right, then to his left, as if the nervous action would absolve him of what he was about to do. He ran back inside, binoculars in hand, and bounded down the stairs, fully intent on climbing up the incline on the left of his tower. The angled viewpoint would help him get a better view of the bathhouse, and, hopefully, her.
She wouldn't mind. Hell, she once jokingly wrote that she was going to take a bath, asking him to keep an eye on the gorge for her.
He had not looked down the foggy pit even once back then, his viewer decisively pointed to the side of the tower, him hoping he could catch just a glimpse of her. It had paid off- that had been the first time he had been rewarded with seeing her bare legs and wet, messy hair.
A shudder ran down his spine, and he brought the binoculars up to his face again. They were heavy, and he readjusted his weight so that his elbow was resting on his knee, providing him with much needed leverage.
He really couldn't tell if she was there. Some clothes were hanging near the door, but he didn't see a towel- maybe she took it inside with her.
“Where are you….” he mumbled. He was worried as well, of course. The job was difficult and dangerous, and having her made the whole ordeal that much easier. Competence and integrity weren’t common values, but she had them both, and then some.
Suddenly, Levi thought he saw movement, and his heart began to beat a little faster. Was it- no. Just the falling leaves, and a runaway squirrel. He sighed, and brought the binoculars back down.
What are you looking at?
Drasa leaned out from the left side of her watchtower. She had decided to go on a wider perimeter walk, and had just gotten back, only to see Levi precariously leaning over the railing in his watchtower. Before she could even step out to signal him, he abruptly ran off, only to reemerge moments later, binoculars in hand, on the right.
Was he looking for her? It seemed so. But if so, why did he settle down on the incline and begin to monitor her tower from the side?
Perhaps he had detected movement? But if he had, he'd be raising the alarm. No, he didn't want to be noticed.
Drasa gasped. He was looking at her bathhouse.
She laughed and slowly shook her head. Not that she hadn't invited him to do so, but this was surprisingly blatant, even for him. After all, Levi wasn’t too direct, and hesitant to do anything that was off-script, so to speak. He was military for sure, and he looked American- perhaps he was a marine.
Still, he was a man, and men liked it when women did such things like walk around naked or lift their shirts up. Hell, if he asked her to do so something like that right now, she would probably do it.
Drasa bit her lip and looked again. Her handsome American soldier hadn’t noticed her. She brought up her binoculars, expecting to see a grin on his face, the kind of dumb expression that men had when they thought they were about to sneak a peek. Instead, his brows were furrowed, and he was bouncing his knee up and down. He suddenly got up again and began to walk further, bringing up the binoculars every so often, before putting them down again and continuing.
It seemed his desire to leer had turned into genuine concern.
Drasa smiled. Levi was nice.
She would watch him too, especially when he did his push-ups on the balcony, the muscles in his arms tensing, his breaths becoming increasingly labored. She also liked looking at him when he sat outside deep in thought, reading a book, or writing in his journal- maybe about her.
But she also saw what plagued him at night. The evenings when he couldn't seem to settle down, or the nights he was up, not because he wasn't tired, but because he couldn't sleep. Late one night, she had even seen him run out to the balcony into the freezing cold, panicked, weapon raised, sharply turning back and forth before finally coming down from his frightened stupor, chest heaving.
It was heartbreaking to see him drag himself to his outdoor chair, put his head in his hands, and begin crying. She had almost stepped out to comfort him, but before she could, he had gone back inside. PTSD was a monster that never really went away- she would know. Her insomnia refused to give her peace, and the moment it let her sleep, it would plague her with abstract, nightmarish imagery, making her feel guilty for even considering slumber.
However, she had been doing better recently. Levi too. It seemed that the relative solace and quiet of their station allowed for respite, in defiance of the looming threat below. That, and their own company. She liked to think her existence had helped him- she knew for a fact that his did.
Perhaps she could help him some more.
Making sure he didn't notice her, she snuck back inside her watchtower.
Levi tapped his fingers on his knee. She wasn't around.
He had no reason to believe that something bad had happened to her- for all he knew, she could be sleeping. Wait, he already thought of that.
Anxious, he began to fidget with a loose thread on his pants. There was no way he would be able to relax if he didn't catch a glimpse of her. His mind was swimming with dozens of possible scenarios, all which could be ruled by simply seeing her. So, he headed back to the tower and settled back down outside on the balcony, hoping she would eventually wander into his view.
Might as well write poetry while he waited. He pulled out his notebook and sat down. Creativity was a challenge when he was this distracted, but it still helped calm him.
Of course, it would calm him more if he weren’t such a shit poet.
He idly tapped his pen on the page. He couldn't come up with anything better than couplet rhymes and repeating verses. Ideas for metaphors had ran out too; nothing original graced his mind.
Perhaps if he tried free verse……or the exact opposite, sonnets. 14 lines, written in iambic pentameter. Yeah, that could work. Maybe he needed structure, rigor to stimulate his creativity.
But what would the topic be? He'd written about nature, and death, and the sky, and sadness, and the passing of time.
Frustrated, he glanced up.
There she was. He broke into a wide smile, only for it to quickly fade when he realized what he could be looking at.
He lunged for the binoculars to confirm that he wasn't hallucinating.
Drasa was naked. Rather, she was almost naked, save for the unfolded large notebook covering the front of her body, from the top of her breasts to her upper thighs. There were three words written across the open pages.
Looking for me?
She was grinning.
Levi pushed away the feeling of embarrassment that came from being found out. Instead, he gawked for a good long moment, enjoying the view, and then hastily began to scribble his reply.
A reply that was no good. He held up his finger, signalling for her to wait, and then wiped the board with his sleeve, after which he began to furiously write again, all the while glancing into the viewer.
He swore he could hear her laughing.
Any doubts she had about this stunt came to a screeching halt once she saw him go for the binoculars.
People could move fast, especially if they were agile and well-trained. However, she hadn't seen someone move from point A to B as fast as Levi had once he realized she was naked.
It was fucking freezing, but it was worth it. She managed to fluster him, so much so that he didn't know what to write back. After a good long moment, interspersed by a couple of peeks into the viewer, he finally held up his sign.
With as much grace as she could muster, Drasa leaned down and picked up her own heavy binoculars. She pressed the paper against her bare breasts, hoping it wouldn't escape her grasp.
Yeah. You'll catch a cold.
That nonchalance was feigned, and it made her giggle. She almost wanted to drop the notebook, but she figured that would be a little too hasty. One, she might give him a heart attack, and two, it was really cold.
Time to go.
With a little curtsy, she slowly backed up, glancing over her shoulder so she wouldn't slam into one of the windows. To her delight, he had leaned back into the viewer, no doubt savoring the last glimpses of her.
If things went well, it wouldn't be the last time he'd see her like this. But she didn't want to tell him that just yet. Suspense was important- both in work and in relationships.
She waved at him just before going back inside, out of his view. Levi stood up, letting his eyes go unfocused as he just stood, stunned, still processing the beautiful sight that had been unexpectedly bestowed upon him.
Perhaps he shouldn't have been surprised. They had been fond of each other for some time now, and he had a feeling that once their shifts were up, they'd meet in person.
He wanted to. He hoped she did too.
Levi scoffed in disbelief, and ran his hands down his face before bringing them back up to the top of his head to absentmindedly ruffle his hair. He realized two things: he was smiling, and he was probably kind of in love.
He turned back to his poetry book, which had been unceremoniously flung to the side when he had noticed her. Out of all the topics he had written about, he hadn't even considered writing about the most cliché one- love.
Well, there was now time to change that. He got to writing, knowing that Drasa would be out in the evening for their cursory perimeter check and scheduled chat.
Before long, the words were flowing.