Work Text:
Kimi loved music. He always had from a young age. He could always be found listening to music in his native Italian and as he got older in English too.
As far as his music taste went, it ultimately depended on his mood and what he was doing that day. Almost always before a race loud rap music would ring out or be blasting in his headphones. Other times when his energy levels weren't so high his music would be softer too.
Kimi didn't always just listen to music however most times he would end up dancing or even singing. He had been told he had a nice singing voice growing up but he always brushed it off. It wasn't until he participated in the required two years of choir (yes he had to do choir while racing most weeks and yes he found it annoying) that he began to believe the words.
However he didn't have much time to showcase his supposed talents as most of his time was focused on his first season of Formula one. That took most of his time, effort, and even his voice if he had been talking for long hours throughout the day.
So Kimi continued his normal routine, racing, racing and more racing with the occasional downtime too. In Imola was when things changed. Kimi was inside his drivers room instead of outside as rain pelted down harshly. He had been tidying his room even though he didn't really have that much with him, normally it was all shoved in his backpack.
So he unfolded his fireproofs and re folded them. Kimi took a step back and debated unfolding them again when he heard a knock at the door through the music blaring in his headphones. He took his headphones off and crossed the space to find George Russell, his teammate standing at the door.
"Hey mate," George greeted, "Can I come in?"
Kimi nodded wordlessly and stepped back so George could come in.
The two stood in silence for a moment before George finally spoke, "Look mate," he started, "I'm here because I could hear you singing, quiet loudly in fact."
"Ah sorry." Kimi immediately apologised but George shook his head. "It would be a bad thing but your voice is quite nice. In fact you should probably sing more, have you thought about posting it?" George reassured.
"Posting it?" Kimi questioned leaning back against the wall.
"Yeah on YouTube or Instagram even, you could use a separate account so it doesn't interfere with your racing."
Kimi hummed in response, "I'll have a think about it. Do you really think I should?"
"Yes." George nodded eagerly, "You should, start with a cover of one of your favourite songs even. There's no guarantee it will go viral so you don't have much to lose." They stood awkwardly once again for a few seconds before George sighed and snapped his fingers, "Right I'll be off now, but think about it seriously."
And think about it Kimi did. The idea floated around in the back of his mind during the weekend until he was back in his apartment in Bologna the Monday after the Imola race.
He was sitting on the floor against his bed cradling his guitar, aimlessly plucking at the strings. He had learned how to play the instrument a couple of years ago but was rather rusty now.
Kimi had decided he would record a video even if he didn't end up posting it. He had already been through his playlist and picked a song that was not only easy for him to sing but matched his mood.
He had rather a rough home race and had been listening to depressing music ever since. So this was his final way to get over the feelings.
With shaky hands he pressed the record button on his phone and lent back. His strumming patterns were slightly uneven and he could tell the chords weren't quite right but sue him he had learnt the chords from a ten minute video half an hour earlier.
"I am not the only traveller who has not repaid his debt"
Kimi started softly his voice even shakier than his hands. He had picked this song because even though the lyrics didn't match his situation he could still feel the emotions laced within the song.
"I've been searching for a trail to follow again
Take me back to the night we met"
As Kimi kept singing his confidence slowly grew. He had found it was best that he didn't look at the camera and just focused on the lyrics falling from his lips instead.
It took him a few days to even think about posting the video he had filmed. He didn't have much to do in terms of setting up an account as he already had a burner but that was the least of his worries. Kimi was worried that if he posted the video than all of the comments and compliments he had gotten on his voice would be false, that his only skill was truly racing.
Eventually he decided to post the video on his youtube account as after some debation and thinking over George's words of wisdom the other day Kimi had come to the conclusion that nothing bad could happen, he was most likely to only get ten views anyway.
Truthfully Kimi forgot about the video in-between his chores and his gym session that day. It wasn't until late in the night (when he should have been asleep) that he finally checked his youtube account. He breathed a sigh of relief when he noticed the video had only reached twenty views and ten likes, no comments yet.
That stopped the thoughts that had been rushing around in his brain for the last few days. He loved singing of course but he didn't want it to take over his life and Kimi was worried that if he went viral, that would happen. It couldn't happen, racing was his priority first and foremost and nothing would change that.
***
Okay maybe something could change that. Or maybe someone.
Kimi had always been told he had a big heart, by almost anyone who knew him in fact. It was no secret he loved loudly despite his cut throat personality on track.
See Kimi was very in touch with his emotions, he knew when he was struggling, when he was mad and most importantly, in love. It wasn't a feeling he felt often, it had only surfaced a handful of times before but never as strong as this.
It was his first grown up love if you will, on none other than his ex teammate and fan selected rival, Ollie Bearman. Kimi had known there was something between them during the last year, even the fans had spotted it but he always thought it was just platonic.
To be honest he wasn't entirely sure when his perspective had switched, when he had finally accepted that his feeling were more than just platonic. Perhaps it was when once again before a free practise George had caught him singing along to a love song and his cheeks flushed red in embarrassment.
All George had said was, "Good on you for getting your feelings out." as if he knew. He couldn't know, could he? surely he had been listening to romantic music more often and sure he was more touchy with Ollie than anyone else and he would sometimes come back from meeting up with Ollie with flushed cheeks, god dammit he definitely knew.
How much he knew, Kimi wasn't sure but he knew he had to avoid George for the time being now until his feelings went away because in no god damn way was he telling Ollie.
Kimi soon grew restless without an outlet to release his feelings about Ollie, as much as he wanted to tell George he didn't want to confirm anything in case the information got out into the wrong hands.
It was when he was actually listening to his 'haha i think i love you' playlist he had created, late one night that the idea hit him. What if he recorded another cover? this time he could find a song that he related to, surely that would help his feelings subside a bit.
Kimi sat up and lent over to the hotel nightstand to grab his laptop. He didn't have his guitar with him so that would make things harder but nothing had to be perfect. He logged in and scrolled through Spotify trying to find a song to match how he was currently feeling.
Once he found the song he wanted he pulled up the lyrics on his laptop and gently rested his phone against the screen. No matter how many times he had been in front of a camera recording videos of himself always made him nervous.
"I'm so sick of thinking, staying up at night"
"I don't want to play around, that ain't on my mind"
His voice was quieter than usual, being cautious and respectful that he was in a public place and it was almost midnight.
"I'm tired of that fantasy, I'm tired of the daydream"
"Tired of just waiting to fall asleep to see you"
This time once he was finished singing he uploaded the cover straight onto Youtube and packed up knowing he would check the analytics when he woke up in the morning.
***
The next few weeks of Kimi's life continued in a similar fashion. Anytime he needed a break from the race track or his feelings felt too strong he would hide away and sing about it.
At the same time his youtube channel had been steadily growing, he now had a following of a thousand followers who luckily seemed to be keeping his talents a secret.
His racing was going just as well, he had been consistently in the points since Monaco and had even almost scored a podium in Spielberg.
This weekend they were racing in Silverstone and Kimi had uploaded the perfect cover from his first class seat on the flight over. He had covered Taylor Swift's, London Boy. It was a little on the nose but who could blame him, he did love the English after all.
Once he was settled into his hotel room in the late afternoon, Kimi spent his time reading some of the comments like he usually did. Most were positive and commented nicely on his voice. He could tell a few were fans of his racing that had found him but as long as they were positive and didn't spread his account around he didn't mind.
----
London Boy (Taylor Swift Cover)
@/AKAsings12
2000 views four hours ago
Comments:
Kimifan1: You can sing hello??I'm so proud!
Antonelliraces: A Taylor cover was unexpected but i love it!
User1: Nice voice man!
Jamestheteddybear: didn't expect this from you but I'm not complaining if anything it makes you cuter
---
That last comment made Kimi pause. He was used to comments on his appearance on his main accounts and sometimes on this one too but something seemed different.
Kimi checked the details of the other account, it had no social media attached and both the bio and the profile picture were related to bears. Okay, weird. Apparently he had a admirer who was obsessed with bears. Whatever, he'd had weirder before.
He closed out of the YouTube app and stood up from his bed eager to get some work done before he was meant to be meeting Ollie for dinner that night. It had become a regular thing that they would go get dinner from somewhere every couple of race weeks and try new food, trainer approved food of course.
They would often listen to music on the way back to the hotel after they had exhausted their talking abilities and secretly Kimi loved it. He loved being able to listen to music (His or Ollie's playlist it didn't matter) and glance over to the drivers side to see Ollie just as happy as he was.
This time on the way back from the restaurant they listened to Ollie's playlist, the soft music blasting through the rented Ferrari he had for that weekend. If Kimi noticed Ollie take a longer route back to the hotel than he sure as hell wasn't going to say anything.
In fact he was quite enjoying that decision Ollie had made, it had left the two boys singing along to some Taylor Swift song Ollie clearly seemed to love based on the fact he was practically dancing in his seat. Kimi sang along quietly occasionally stumbling over a lyric as his brain struggled to translate it.
Kimi was thoroughly exhausted when Ollie dropped him back at his hotel but he was also happy, happy to have spent valuable time with Ollie. He stood outside the car talking with Ollie as he debated asking the boy to come stay with him for the night. In the back of his mind he knew it was a risky move and that it couldn't happen, not on a race weekend anyway.
That turned out to be the happiest moment for Kimi the whole weekend it seemed. It turns out he had used up all his luck at Silverstone last year when he won by over 8 seconds. In a rare twist it had stayed completely dry for the race even though after Kimi had qualified a mere 16th he had been begging for rain.
During the race he had gotten five laps in only to be taken out by Bortoleto who had tried a rather risky move or ran into Kimi on purpose depending on who you talked to.
Kimi spent the rest of the race standing in the garage beside Toto even though he just wished he could hide away in his room. Sure he had blamed Gabriel for the move on track but off it he always put the blame on himself, that he was too slow, that he was letting the team down, that he hadn't done a good enough job.
He flew back to Bologna later that night with his dad, the negative feelings from the race still lingering in his mind. Kimi was nearly silent the whole flight home a stark contrast from the usual cheerful boy he was. When he landed he decided to go for a run to try and clear the jumbled mess in his head, although after a couple of kilometers of his feet pouding steadily on the concrete, nothing had changed.
Kimi returned to his apartment he shared with his family and stripped off his workout gear, getting changed into something more comfortable.
He grabbed his guitar from the corner of his room and sat down on the floor next to Toto Bear, using the bear to prop his guitar up as he scrolled through his spotify. He knew what song he wanted to record, he just had to find it in his endless catalogue of songs. Find it he did, within two hours Kimi had filmed, recorded and posted a new cover.
Kimi like normal turned his phone off straight away, knowing otherwise he would spend hours watching everyone's reactions roll in and overanalyzing himself. He decided to take a nap instead, he was still feeling the effects of being on a plane and not sleeping when he should've on said plane.
When he awoke hours later the sheets were twisted around his legs, his curls were everywhere and the moon was peaking in through his window. Kimi groaned sitting up and scrubbing a hand over his face before blindly reaching for his phone. Once he had a secure grip around the device he hit the power button and waited for it to wake up.
Kimi immediately navigated to the Youtube app and waited for his profile to refresh, squinting down at the bright screen in the dim moonlight. Once his profile had loaded Kimi blinked down at the screen in surprise, his newest cover which wasn't even a popular song had gone mildly viral in the three hours he had been asleep.
----
Mind is a Prison (Alec Benjamin Cover)
@/AKAsings12
10,000 views three hours ago
Comments:
Kimifan2: I know this weekend didn't go how you wanted but I'm so proud!
Antonelliraces: everything okay dude?
User1: Nice voice man!
User2: Kimi Antonelli singing? as if the dude needed something else to be bad at.
Jamestheteddybear: hope you're doing okay, that crash wasn't your fault. Beautiful voice as always btw ;)
view 320 more comments here:
---
Kimi sighed as he glanced at the top comments, although he supposed not every comment could be positive. He was more concerned however with how fast his channel was suddenly growing, although 10,000 was rookie numbers for how many people he saw on a race weekend, it seemed a lot for a video of him singing.
He closed out of Youtube to check his other notifications and found George had messaged him while he had been asleep.
---
British older brother
You've been keeping up with your covers pretty well mate and starting to gain some traction, good on ya!
Italian younger brother
thank you George it's a little nerve wracking though
especially with the hate
British older brother
That's okay
why are you nervous about it? you have an amazing voice
try not to worry about the hate too much mate and if you do try and talk to someone about it
maybe even Ollie 😉
Italian younger brother
I'm nervous because it's a lot of attention purely just on me, I don't have anything to fall back on
don't joke like that either mate
Ollie doesn't need to know i'm singing love songs let alone love songs about him
British older brother
Aha so you do admit it?
Italian younger brother
admit what?
British older brother
Your mega massive crush on Ollie that is obvious to both half the grid and your fanbase?
Italian younger brother
what?
it's obvious?
who knows?
wait
DOES HE KNOW?
British older brother
😂😭
Kimi calm down
As far as I know, he doesn't know.
I know and I may have told Alex but I think that's it, at least about your crush.
Italian younger brother
good, good
wait what do you mean at least about my crush?
that means you told more people, something else about me correct?
British older brother
Yeah that's correct, good job
I may have told the grid I had a friend who was posting covers on YouTube
I didn't mention your name though
Italian younger brother
George!
seriously mate you gotta check with me these things first now everyone is going to know how horrible I am and how in love with Ollie i am
British older brother
You're overthinking it mate
1. It's not like you're screaming I love Olllie from the rooftops although you do have this dopey look on your face whenever you do a cover
2. You are not horrible at all, we can call you a triple threat at this rate
3. I didn't tell anybody your channel name it's not like they're going to find you immediately
Quit overthinking everything and focus on one problem at a time, that problem being, how are you going to tell Ollie how you feel?
Italian younger brother
I'm not.
British older brother
Yes you are.
Ooh i know you should sing him a love song in the paddock and I can film his cute reaction 🥰
Italian younger brother
I'm not doing that.
I'm not planning to tell him when I know he doesn't feel the same
British older brother
Okay I'm going to type this really bluntly so it gets inside your seemingly tiny brain
OLLIE IS IN LOVE WITH YOU IT'S OBVIOUS
ALEX AND I LITERALLY THOUGHT YOU WERE A COUPLE UNTIL YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T
That clear enough?
seen 8:43pm
Kimi?
hellooo?
my annoying younger brother where'd you go?
Italian younger brother
I'm here.
just ya know had to scream into my pillow for a moment
your not joking?
British older brother
Not joking, I wouldn't do that to you.
So you going to make a move now that I've told you that, you bloody idiot?
Italian younger brother
maybe I don't know what to do
how to even approach him
like you said we already act like a couple
so I can't exactly make a move like that
British older brother
I was only half joking when I said about singing for him you know
It doesn't have to be anything grand and major like performing in the paddock just maybe go to his hotel room or something or tag him in a cover you post
Just a way to show him how much you care for him
Unless you wanna dedicate a win to him or something 🤔
Italian younger brother
okay i'll think about it
thank you George
British older brother
That's alright mate
You go work out how to get your boy okay 👍
*Italian younger brother has liked one message*
---
Kimi breathed a deep sigh as he closed out of his chat with George, whenever it was one of relief or exhaustion he couldn't tell. He was lucky to have such a good teammate he knew that but he also wished George didn't know him so well sometimes. He placed his phone back on his bedside table and laid back on his bed with a huff.
Kimi stared at the ceiling feeling more emotional turmoil than he thought he had ever felt. He liked Ollie, no loved Ollie and Ollie loved him back. Ollie loved him back, so why was he still just as nervous to say something? To let the butterflies that had been fluttering around in his stomach finally take flight.
At least he knew now his feelings were reciprocated and he wouldn't be rejected, destined to spend the rest of his days avoiding his favourite person. Now he just had to work out how he was going to confess to Ollie. Kimi knew it was going to be stupid to do some big grand gesture, they were celebrities after all but maybe he could follow George's plan and sing for the older boy?
It was what he had been doing initially anyway every time he did a cover of a love song in the back of his mind he had been thinking about Ollie. Surely it wouldn't be that hard for him to keep doing that and then maybe when he was ready he could officially dedicate one to Ollie? yeah that might just work.
Kimi flung himself off his bed, a plan formed in his mind. He grabbed both his guitar and phone and made his way out of his room, being mindful of the fact he could hear his parents had guests over. Kimi walked quietly out to the patio and sat down on the ground. He scrolled through his dedicated music playlist looking for the perfect song. Once he had read through both the lyrics and the cords several times Kimi propped his phone up on a chair to record and leant back against the wall. He started strumming softly getting into the rhythm before he began to sing.
'Lost in the mornin, time starts to crawl
Can we share the lonely if my heart is small?
Your touch is deadly and I wanna call
Is it better to feel this, or feel nothing at all?'
This time when Kimi uploaded the cover, he didn't mind watching the likes and comments roll in, he felt filled with a new clear confidence after talking to George.
-------
Shakes (Luke Hemmings cover)
@/AKAsings12
5,000 views four hours ago
Comments:
Kimifan1: a luke hemmings cover? this boy always finds a new way for me to fall in love with him
> Jamestheteddybear: @/Kimifan1 not if I can help it!
Antonellionetwo: wow two covers in one day? we're being spoiled
User1: Okay i think i'm officially a fan now
User3: get a better hobby bro
Jamestheteddybear: You look so cute in this, like the song speaks to your heart
>AKAsings12: @/Jamestheteddybear Thanks, I think?
>> Jamestheteddybear: @/AKAsings12 it was a compliment don't worry, nice to know i have your attention
>>> AKAsings12: @/Jamestheteddybear you definitely do, is there somewhere else i could talk to you?
>>>> Jamestheteddybear: @/AKAsings12 Try Twitter ;)
view 130 more comments here:
-----
Kimi sighed heavily, of course the only other app he could talk to the other boy on was the app he hated using and hadn't used in months. He found the app deep in his phone and had to wait patiently for it to update before he could even think about creating a new account to message James on if that even was his name.
He found James quite easily it wasn't like the boy didn't have a recognisable username. Kimi clicked into a chat with the boy but hesitated to type anything suddenly feeling nervous. After a moment of debation he decided to just do it.
AKASings12
Hey there
i take it this is the right person
Jamestheteddybear
it indeed is Kimi
AKAsings12
So you do know who I am?
Jamestheteddybear
I do
it's kinda hard not too
why did you want to message me?
AKAsings12
I've seen your comments
I got curious
on why you're so nice to me
unless I'm being silly and your just a massive fan of mine
Jamestheteddybear
I'm nice to you because you deserve it
that's not to say I'm not a fan but I'm not one of those obsessed ones like you're probably thinking
although you are cute so you can't blame me if I was obsessed
AKAsings12
wow full of compliments are we?
I suppose i should thank you
I would compliment you back
but all i know about you is that your nice to me and that you like bears a little too much
Jamestheteddybear
the more you keep thanking me the more I'll compliment you
don't worry i wish I could tell you more about me but I can't
AKAsings12
why not?
it's not like you'll get in trouble
or you're some weirdo right?
Jamestheteddybear
No I'm not a weird old man
I'm twenty
there you go that's a wonderful fact for you
but uh i might get in trouble if I tell you too much
sorry
AKAsings12
Don't apologise James
I get it
I go through the same thing being media managed
It's why I like having my separate account
means i get some freedom
Jamestheteddybear
Well I'm very glad you made that account
it means i get to hear you singing more often
AKAsings12
you've heard me sing before?
besides the account?
Jamestheteddybear
No what I meant was I like that you post regularly
haha that's all
AKAsings12
Okay
if you're sure
I gotta go now before I freeze
sitting outside was a bad idea
Jamestheteddybear
Alright then
nice talking to you
stay warm for me x
---
Talking to James was surprisingly easier than Kimi thought it would be, the awkwardness that he had expected from talking to a new person simply wasn't there. It felt like he had known James for weeks or even months already and Kimi found that quite nice, he found it even nicer that he could possibly gain a new friend outside of the Formula 1 world.
Kimi headed back inside to his bedroom with his guitar in his hands, he hadn't been kidding when he had said to James that he was going to freeze outside. He set his guitar down on his bed and instead picked up his jumper he had discarded earlier in the day. Once he was comfortable, Kimi settled back down in his bed under the now cold covers, to read some more comments.
***
Kimi had finally done it. He finally created a posting schedule for his covers on youtube with the help of George, who with one very long pep talk and a small powerpoint had convinced Kimi to say screw it and build his youtube channel up so he could use it as a marketing tool if he ever wanted to. Kimi now posted one cover each week with the exception of two on race weekends as it helped calm his nerves in an odd way.
The rest of his life seemed to be on an up in the last three weeks as well. Kimi had scored a podium in Hungary that had earned him a large congratulations from not only the team but Max and Ollie as well. They had all gone out that night and although Kimi was surrounded by his whole team the most of the night he had still tried to find a quiet moment to talk to Ollie.
In the end it was Ollie that found him nursing a drink in a corner trying to get away from all the action for a moment. Ollie had sidled up to him, wrapping an arm around Kimi's waist easily, a little bit tipsy himself. They had talked in hushed tones for a moment before things fell silent and Kimi, helped by the alcohol finally felt confident enough to say something to the older boy.
Just as he was about to say something Kimi was pulled away from Ollie by an over enthusiastic team member. Ollie was left standing in the corner as Kimi shot an apologetic glance at him and Kimi swore he had never felt more frustrated as he saw the wink Ollie sent him in response. That had been the last chance Kimi had to say anything to Ollie before the summer break and it had been ruined.
Now Kimi had been going insane quietly inside as he spent the first week of summer break at home. His family had noticed he had been more twitchy and distracted lately Kimi could tell but he was nervous to say anything to them, especially in regards to Ollie. He had come clean about his youtube channel a little while ago to his parents and while they didn't completely understand it they were always supportive of him.
Still Kimi was going insane without his support system and his confidant in George who had turned his phone off the moment summer break had started. It wasn't like he could talk on his youtube channel about Ollie for hours (as much as he wanted to) that would just be a terrible idea, he needed someone to talk to about his feelings and fast.
Kimi was scrolling through his comments on youtube when the idea hit him. Maybe James would know what to do or maybe even just listen to him rant? They had been talking infrequently since Kimi had first messaged him and Kimi now considered him a friend so it might not be a bad idea after all.
Kimi opened Twitter and navigated straight to their chat letting out a small laugh at their last discussion (James had been teaching him about a show called We Bare Bears like the true bear lover he was) before beginning to type.
---
AKAsings12
Hey James
Can I talk to you about something?
it's fine if I can not
Jamestheteddybear
Hey Kimi!
Of course you can
What's up?
AKASings12
You sure you want to hear?
it's sort of complicated
Jamestheteddybear
I love complicated problems, please do tell
only if you're comfortable though
AKAsings12
Okay, okay
I like someone well I don't know if I like them or i love them
that's part one of the problem
Jamestheteddybear
Okay that wasn't what I was expecting
is it another celebrity or model or something?
AKAsings12
Ah not quite
Jamestheteddybear
A driver then?
AKAsings12
Maybe
Jamestheteddybear
wait what
I was joking
You're gay?
(i mean that in a nice way)
AKAsings12
That's another part of the problem
I don't know, i just know i really like this driver
i don't know about when it comes to other guys
Jamestheteddybear
that's completely okay to not know
hell I'm in a similar situation but I never told you that okay?
Am I allowed to ask who it is?
AKAsings12
I might as well tell you George says it's obvious anyway
I don't know how much formula 1 you watch but it's Ollie Bearman.
*Seen at 3:12*
*Jamestheteddybear is typing!*
*Seen at 3:12*
AKAsings12
James?
you okay there?
did my romantic choices finally freak you out?
Jamestheteddybear
Sorry I'm here
i know who you're talking about, nice taste
and no you didn't freak me out haha
AKAsings12
Okay good
Jamestheteddybear
Do you know if he feels the same?
I mean surely he's got too, you're rather attractive and your personality is awesome
AKAsings12
Why thank you
If i wasn't already practically in love with another guy I'd be blushing
I've been told he feels the same I've just been struggling to tell him
I was going too last week and missed my chance
Jamestheteddybear
Aw that sucks I'm sorry, at least you know how he feels.
Do you have a plan to ask him out or anything?
AKAsings12
Well I know he loves music just like i do and I've never really sang for or around him even when we're in the car together
So I was thinking I could perform a cover for him or something like that to convey my feelings because I'm hopeless with words and I'm too nervous to just kiss him
Jamestheteddybear
wow
sounds super romantic
I feel like he'd really like that
You should definitely sing for him like go over to his hotel room or something when the season starts up again and perform for him
and then if you wanted to go that one step further tell him about your channel and all the songs you've been singing about him.
AKAsings12
that's actually genius mate
thank you so much
how'd you know i'd been singing about him?
Jamestheteddybear
the mix of love songs and the look on your face whenever you sing? haha
no once you started this conversation I connected the dots
AKAsings12
well you're rather smart aren't you
once again thank you
you're making this summer break a lot more bearable x
Jamestheteddybear
Anytime Kimi x
---
Talking with James had really helped Kimi and now going back into the racing season in Zandvoort Kimi was ready to finally confess his feelings to Ollie.The only problem was he would have to wait until the end of the weekend to tell him and Kimi wasn't a very patient person, not when it came to matters of the heart at least.
The whole weekend it was like he had an itch he couldn't scratch lingering around in his brain. Every time he saw Ollie something was screaming at him, 'Do it now!' However he only managed to see Ollie for a few seconds at time as the boy oddly seemed to be ignoring him or maybe he was just busy. Kimi didn't want to read into it too much in case he started spiralling about the other boy's feelings.
Kimi had an average race this time around finishing p5 while Ollie finished just behind him in p7. After the race ended Kimi went straight over to watch George on the podium before disappearing to get changed and message Ollie. He knew if he wanted to go see the older boy it would have to be a quick trip after a long afternoon of debrief and interviews. It took a few moments, just enough time for Kimi to go through the shower before Ollie replied to his message with his hotel room number and a time.
So at 9:15 pm Kimi knocked on Ollie's hotel room door, dressed in comfy sweatpants and a blue sweater his guitar on his back. He waited a moment before Ollie opened the door and smiled at him. He was also dressed in sweatpants and his blue sweater, matching with Kimi.
"Hey," Kimi started, "Can I come in?"
"Of course." Ollie nodded and opened the door wider, "Come on in."
Kimi walked in and settled down on the partially unmade bed like he owned the place, setting his guitar down beside the bed. Ollie shut to door and followed him onto the bed sitting so their legs brushed against one another.
"Not that I don't love to see you but why are you here? And why do you have that?" Ollie grinned pointing at Kimi's guitar on the ground.
"Well." Kimi swallowed suddenly feeling nervous as he picked up his guitar off the ground and unzipped it from the case. "I may have been keeping something from you, well a few things actually and I wanted to share them but only if you'll listen to me."
Ollie looked less curious than Kimi had expected as he glanced across at him, instead the boy seemed to have a knowing smile on his lips as he nodded, "I'll listen to anything you say or rather sing I guess." Ollie joked lightly.
"Good." Kimi breathed a sigh of relief. "Because that's what I'm going to do."
Kimi settled his guitar in his lap, his hands gripping the instrument as he prepared to play. He took one last deep breath and began strumming, glancing down at his hands every few seconds to check he was playing the right chords as his nerves took over.
"You just know, sometimes you feel it in your bones
Although we've heard that hearts can still be wrong
Somethings is telling me you're the one."
Kimi started softly, his voice shaking slightly as he kept his eyes trained on his playing, too nervous to watch Ollie's reaction.
"I just know
even if I had a heart of stone
You could make it bleed all on your own
You could break it but i hope you won't"
As Kimi reached the chorus he was beginning to feel less nervous his love for the music taking over him.
"I'd burn it down, I'd light it up
For you i'd risk it all
I'd rather crash, I'd rather crawl than never have your love at all
With only bricks to break my fall for you i'd risk it all"
Kimi finally looked at Ollie in a fleeting glance, to see the older boy looking at him with a mix of surprise and was that love? whatever it was made Kimi's cheeks flush as he kept singing.
"Stand your ground
Win or lose I gotta see this out
Go ahead, I'll let you watch me drown
It takes takes more than this to keep me down"
Kimi finished the song a minute or so later, his hands stilling against his guitar as his heart pounded in his chest. He hadn't looked at Ollie again still too nervous of the other boy's reaction and Kimi knew he could tell as he felt Ollie place a hand on his shoulder.
"You can look at me now." Ollie said reassuringly.
Slowly Kimi tilted his head up to look at Ollie, expecting to see a mix of annoyance or disgust on the older boy's face but he found none.
"That was really lovely Kimi." Ollie started, "Your voice is amazing, I'm glad you showed me finally."
Kimi bit his lip the flush on his cheeks growing darker. "Thanks." He mumbled. "Do- you- uh know why I chose that song?"
"I think I do." Ollie smiled, moving his hand from Kimi's shoulder to his chin, "I was wondering for a long time when you were going to do something about it, I just didn't expect you to confess like this."
"Hey!" Kimi pouted, "You could've done something too! I tried to ask you out in Hungary."
"I know." Ollie laughed lightly his thumb brushing Kimi's jaw, "I did do something about it, you know. You just didn't notice."
"What do you mean you did something about it?" Kimi asked slightly confused and still disgruntled, he however was enjoying Ollie's touch very much.
"Don't you worry about it." Ollie answered shaking his head.
"I'm worrying about it." Kimi answered immediately, "Just tell me what did you do to try to get us together?"
"Fine i'll tell you." Ollie sighed, his hand moving to cup Kimi's cheek, "Just don't hate yourself when I tell you."
Kimi just sat there patiently waiting for Ollie to explain himself.
"I know about your youtube channel." Ollie said bluntly, "And no it's not because George told me, I found it myself." He stopped for a second letting Kimi take in the information before he asked, "You know how you've had that one person in your comments section for months now that likes bears?"
"Yeah?" Kimi said slowly beginning to put the pieces together. He moved his guitar off his lap because if Ollie said what Kimi thought he was going too, he was launching himself at the older boy.
"Guess who's middle name is James and he really likes bears." Ollie said sheepishly, his grip on Kimi's cheek loosening.
Without thinking Kimi shifted putting his hands on Ollie's shoulders pushing him back onto the bed. Ollie landed on top of the pillows harshly, his hair brushing the headboard. Kimi followed suit moving so he was straddling the older boy, leaning over him his hands either side of Ollie's shoulders.
"You told me how to ask you out, mate what!" Kimi snapped his tone full of disbelief.
"It worked didn't it?"
Kimi paused for a moment, his grip on Ollie's shoulders tightening, "Not the point here!"
"I've been talking to you, without knowing it's you, do you know how weird that is?" Kimi continued ranting now, "and I feel stupid for not seeing it like you said, hell I even told you I liked you without knowing!"
"Okay Kimi calm down firstly." Ollie said softly his hands instinctively finding their way to Kimi's hips. "I should've told you I understand that, but would we have gotten somewhere if I had said something sooner?"
"No I suppose not." Kimi grumbled.
"Exactly so realistically this situation is all thanks to me." Ollie said cheekily trying to cheer Kimi up, "Which as much as the song was cute you still haven't asked me out yet."
"If you shut up for a moment I might." Kimi huffed moving one of his hands to cup Ollie's face, his thumb brushing over the Brit's lips, "But really do I need to say it? we both know how we feel."
"Well if you have a better alternative be my guest." Ollie snarked, his lips falling slightly open on instinct.
Kimi smirked at the boy's reaction knowing what he was suggesting, "Oh I do."
Kimi brushed his thumb across Ollie's lips one last time before he moved his hand away and his lips replaced his hand. Ollie responded to the kiss immediately his eyes fluttering closed and his grip on Kimi's hips tightened as he pulled the younger boy closer.
Kimi responded by shifting closer, his knees digging into the mattress either side of Ollie's hips. He held back keeping the kiss gentler than he personally would've preferred but he didn't want to come on too strong just yet.
Ollie pulled away first his head flopping back onto the pillow behind him as he opened his eyes and gazed up at Kimi. "Well I guess we're together now." Ollie muttered but the answer was fairly obvious.
"Yeah." Kimi laughed lightly, "freaking finally, James." He said teasingly running a hand through Ollie's hair.
"Yeah yeah whatever, Andrea." Ollie huffed before he seemed to think about something, his eyebrows furrowed in thought.
"Hey can we do that again?" He asked slowly.
"What the kiss?" Kimi asked as he fought the slight urge to laugh.
"Yeah I just didn't know if you would want to just yet." Ollie admitted.
"Of course I want to kiss you Ollie." Kimi reassured as he lent back down for emphasis. Ollie met him halfway their lips slotting together.
Kimi let him control the kiss this time and was thoroughly surprised when Ollie deepened it rather quickly. Kimi let out a soft noise of surprise, his hand slipping down to rest on Ollie's waist.
Ollie gently traced the younger boy's lips with his tongue expecting him to open up. Kimi however bit down on Ollie's bottom lip forcing a gasp out of him that quickly turned into a whimper as Kimi's hand slid under his sweater.
Kimi tensed slightly when he realised Ollie didn't have a shirt on, his hand brushing the bare skin of Ollie's side but he quickly relaxed, continuing the kiss.
They broke apart moments later, both breathing heavily. Ollie's sweater was rucked up around his waist and Kimi's curls were everywhere. The both looked like a right mess as they smiled at eachother.
"Wow." Ollie laughed breathlessly, "You're literally perfect you know that right? You're an amazing driver, you can sing and now you kiss me like that?"
"Shut up." Kimi immediately grumbled back, burying his head in the crook of Ollie's neck. "You can't just say things like that."
"Aw does someone not like compliments?" Ollie teased wrapping his arms around Kimi's waist and pulling him down so the younger boy was flush against him.
Kimi huffed in response, his breath tickling the side of Ollie's neck, "I can handle compliments it's just different hearing them from you."
"Yeah sure okay." Ollie laughed bringing a hand up to Kimi's back, rubbing softly.
They laid there for a few moments in the silence of the room, just reflecting on what had happened. Kimi had curled up his head resting on Ollie's chest listening to his fast heartbeat. Ollie every so often was pressing soft kisses to the top of Kimi's head, almost as a subtle reminder that this would be their new normal now.
Some time later Ollie shifted almost as if he knew Kimi was thinking about falling asleep on top of him. "Hey Kimi?" He started, running a hand through Kimi's curls.
"Yeah?" Kimi mumbled sounding half asleep already.
"Can-" Ollie hesitated for a moment before continuing, "Can you sing for me again?"
Kimi let out a noise of protest but he shifted anyway, propping his head up on Ollie's chest. "I suppose I can." He chuckled lightly, "No promises it's becoming a regular thing though."
"That's okay." Ollie grinned, "I'll take what I can get."
*Two Months Later*
*AKAsings12 has uploaded one new video!*
Everything Has Changed (Taylor Swift cover) Ft. My boyfriend
@/AKAsings12
15,000 views five hours ago
Comments:
Kimifan1: Ahh a taylor swift cover, with Ollie?! omg I love this
GeorgeRussell: congrats mate, happy for you both
> AlexAlbon: I'm just here to say I agree with George, we can go on double dates now
Antonellionetwo: wow just wow
User1: It's been amazing watching your journey over the last few months and now you're singing with your boyfriend, i'm a proud fan
OllieBearman: That's my handsome boy and I!
User4: You're dating Ollie Bearman? personally that's weird but good on you
BearnelliAntman: Omg you've finally confirmed it!!! love you both
Jamestheteddybear: We look so cute in this, thanks for covering my favourite song
> AKAsings12: @/Jamestheteddybear You say that like I didn't have to convince you to sing with me
>> Jamestheteddybear: @/AKAsings12 And yet i did it anyway, love you
>>> AKAsings12: @/Jamestheteddybear Love you too
view 312 more comments here:
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*click here to see transcript for video Everything has changed (Taylor Swift Cover) Ft my boyfriend*
Kimi: Ciao everyone, I know I don't normally talk a lot before singing but there's someone I would like to introduce to you today.
*A slight pause as the Italian glances off screen*
Kimi: I would like to introduce you all to my favourite person, my boyfriend.
*A second boy walks into frame sitting down on the bed beside Kimi*
Boy: Hello everybody I'm Ollie Bearman, this idiot's boyfriend.
*Ollie glances across at Kimi, a smile on his lips*
Kimi: And after much ah encouragement on my end as you can probably tell by the title we're doing a cover of Everything Has Changed by Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran.
Ollie: My favourite song!
*Kimi shakes his head and adjusts his grip on his guitar*
Kimi: Okay you good to go?
*Ollie nods looking slightly nervous although as soon as Kimi starts strumming a wide grin breaks out over his face*
'All I knew this morning when I woke
Is I know something now, know something now I didn't before'