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“Luke, come on! We're going to be late and you've had hours to get ready.”
“Sorry, sorry. I just need to put on some chapstick and I'll be ready.”
Sam walks into the bathroom of Luke's small apartment and leans in the doorway.
Before he can stop himself, he realizes he's looking at Luke's lips. The Chapstick gliding across them. He quickly shakes his head and pushes away the thought, because it’s a thought he can’t be having.
“What flavor did you go with tonight? Something festive?”
“What do you think?” Luke puts his chapstick into his pocket and turns to face Sam, his smile charming as always. Deep dimples and a gentle grin. “I went with Cherry. Thought It would be fun but still simple.”
“I think Cherry matches you. Now let's get going before it's too late. It's at AJ’s right?” Sam asks while he hands over Luke’s coat. His hand lingers on it as Luke takes it.
“Yep.” Luke says. He is struggling to get his arm into the sleeve of his coat, almost immediately Sam helps. Luke pats his shoulder as if to thank him, gives Sam's shoulder a little squeeze, then walks over to the door. “Are we taking the bus?”
“I think we should walk. It’s a nice night and only about a ten minute walk. Plus then we can see the stars.” Sam walks over to where Luke is standing and puts his hand on the slightly shorter man's head, Ruffling his hair a little. “That okay with you?”
Like turns to look into Sam's eyes, not even trying to fix his hair. “Sounds like a perfect start to a fun night. I mean, you being here was the perfect start but….”
His voice fades off. Almost instantly Sam cuts in.
“Aww. Someone like my company?” Sam grins and opens the door. He lets Luke step out before stepping out himself, then shutting the door and stepping aside so Luke can lock it.
“Of course I do. You’re my best friend.” Luke starts walking down the hall and holds the door to the stairwell open for Sam. He holds his arm out as if to say ‘You first.’
“Why didn’t we just take the elevator?” Sam asks as he reaches the bottom of the stairs, Luke in tow.
“Didn’t wanna. Then again, why not take the stairs?”
Sam can tell Luke is smirking behind him at that smart remark. Sam does the same. They continue walking in comfortable silence. Their arms brushing up against each other as they walk. Sam tried not to focus on that. As they walk out the door of the building the cool night air hits them. The noises of the night playing melodies in their ears. Sam can’t help but admire how Luke’s hair softly blows in the wind. How the gentle light of the moon shines on Luke's face. How everything is perfect, and beautiful, and just feels right when Luke's around.
“Sam. Just one rule for tonight that we have to hold each other accountable for.” Luke glances at Sam then looks out at the moon.
“What is it?” Sam asks. His eyes glinting with curiosity.
“Just don’t let the other do anything that they’ll regret. Okay?”
Sam easily picks up the undertone of seriousness in Luke’s voice.
“Okay. I’ll do my best.”
Sam says reassuringly, making sure Luke is able to tell he means it. Both of their faces settle into soft smiles. But Luke’s is so beautiful that Sam could take all the classes and courses in the world on how to smile but nothing would compare to the gentle one on his best friend's face.
Then there is silence. A silence that lingers for quite a few minutes. But maybe that is okay. Maybe they can walk without words for a few minutes more until they get to AJ’s. But then that also means not hearing Luke’s voice for even longer, so of course, Sam doesn’t like that. But instead of breaking the silence Sam just chooses to admire Luke’s presence from behind. That beautiful man. A man he is thankful to be best friends with. A man that he wished he could be more with.
Luke seems to feel Sam's gaze and talks without turning around, still walking.
“Sam. I have a question.”
“Yeah?” Sam speeds up his pace a little bit to walk next to Luke. Luke seems to be thinking about what to say. Like his words will either be life changing or just normal words. Sam reaches out and squeezes Luke’s hand to let him know that whatever he says will be okay. Luke gently smiled and looked up into Sam's eyes.
“Do you think we’ll ever find love?” Luke’s gaze slowly drifts off of Sam and back down to the street in front. A chill is sent down Sam’s spine. He is quick to realize they are no longer holding hands, and Luke’s arms are crossed in front of him. He is also quick to realize the warmth in his face and the fact he is blushing. Of course he is. Why can’t he help it? He can’t let himself get exposed by something as stupid as that. But he realizes that Luke is too. There are a few seconds of awkward silence. Sam looks up to the starry night sky whilst trying to find at least a few helpful words to say.
“Well. I think that at some point everyone does. Even if they haven’t realized they did.” Sam looks at Luke and gives a soft smile, trying to figure out if Luke understood him. If he had said too much. But the pressure was quickly lifted as they were at AJ’s door. Then they go inside.
——————————————————————-
The party was small. The SFTH group and a few others. Just a small gathering of friends. Luke sipped at a water he’d been holding for 10 minutes, yet there was barely any water gone.
Most people had already found others to talk to. Tom was making some more punch, AJ was in one of the small groups talking to someone, and Sam was who knows where doing who knows what.
Within a matter of minutes AJ had disappeared too and Luke was starting to zone out.
The hand on his shoulder brought him back. Tom’s hand.
“Hey Tom. Done with the punch?” Luke tries forcing a smile but it doesn’t work.
“You okay? I’ve been keeping my eyes on you and you’ve just been standing here since you got here. I’d figure you’d be with Sam or something.”
“About that. I don’t know what to do. On the way here-“ he gets cut off by Tom. A hand gently covering his mouth.
“Hold on Luke. Let’s sit down and breathe.” They walk over and sit down on the couch that was a few feet away from them. Tom looks over into Luke’s eyes. “Okay. What happened?” Tom places a reassuring arm around Luke. Luke takes a deep breath.
“On the way here I asked him if he thought we would ever find love. There was some awkward silence. And when I say awkward I mean it. And then he did his cute little smile he always does and said, and I quote, ‘Well. I think that at some point everyone does. Even if they haven’t realized they did.’ Like man! Then he blushed a little and it went back to awkward silence. Then thank gosh we arrived here.”
Luke rambles on about Sam for a while, hoping Sam isn’t going to show up and overhear anything. Of course, Tom listens like always, calming Luke when he starts getting too worked up. Little did Luke know that Sam was in the other room talking to AJ about the exact same thing.
Afterwards Luke decides to get some punch. A little Alcohol won’t hurt anything. If anything it helps him be more talkative. And damn that punch Tom makes is good. Like really good.
After about two hours of mingling with some old friends, others that he hasn’t met before, and downing a few more cups of punch, he decides to give himself a well deserved break from people-ing. And either way the place is starting to clear out a bit. Now it’s just the SFTH boys and about 3 others. Luke overhears the group saying that they will be leaving soon. He is the only one from the SFTH group still out in the living room. Who knows where the others were. But Luke could tell that he might have had one to many cups of punch. He can’t really tell much anymore anyways, as a result of the punch.
Those last 3 people, whose names have escaped Luke’s head, grab their coats, and head towards the door. They all mumble goodbyes and give head nods towards Luke, which are responded to with a drunken “mm hm.” from Luke. Then they’re gone.
Now Luke is alone. In silence. Not awkward, not comfortable either, just silence.
He decides to head towards the back den and knocks on the door.
Within a few seconds Tom opens the door. Luke smiles as he sees AJ and Sam on the chairs and couch behind him.
“Hey guyssssss. Can I join you? Also AJ those last few people left and they said bye!” Luke lets a small drunken giggle slip.
“Luke. Are you drunk?” Tom is now getting Luke sat down on the couch next to Sam, then returns to his original chair.
“Maybe just a little bit.” Luke smiles and curls up on the couch, setting his head in Sam's lap. Sam gently starts stroking Luke’s hair. Luke turns his head and smiles up to Sam. Once again he giggles.
“Hi”
“Hi Luke.”
Tom leans over and whispers into AJ’s ear.
“Well this is new.”
“Yeah. I wonder what all Luke will remember tomorrow.”
They look up and see Sam mouthing words to them. If Tom reads right, Sam is asking what the Hell is happening. Tom shrugs with a smile and mouths I’m not sure. AJ gets up to go get some blankets from the living room.
“Luke I-“
Sam looks down to see Luke fast asleep in his lap. A little angelic man. In his lap. Shit. This can’t be real, all it is, is Luke being drunk. Nothing else. Sam repeats this in his head until he almost convinces himself that what he’s repeating is true. Yet he wishes it wasn’t. He really, really, wishes it wasn't.
“AJ! Could we crash here for the night? I don’t want to have to wake Luke and either way It would be hard to handle him if I tried to get him home.” Sam calls out. His fingers gently intertwined in Luke's soft hair. Golden and beautiful.
“Of course! Tom’s staying too. Do you guys just want to stay in the den and watch a movie?” AJ calls back from the hall.
“That works! Thanks AJ!”
——————————————————————-
By the time the movie ends, Tom is the only one left awake. AJ is spread gracefully across the beanbag he brought in, and Sam is still on the couch with Luke’s head in his lap. His legs are on the table in front. He has one arm draped over the back of the couch and one on Luke’s back. Tom stands up and grabs his phone, careful not to make the floor squeak.
He decides to take a picture. One of AJ and his interesting, but still graceful sleeping position on the beanbag. One of Sam and Luke, because this is a historic moment. One of himself because why not. And one of all of them. Them against the world. Forever and Always.
——————————————————————-
By the time Sam wakes up the next morning it’s around 10. AJ’s still asleep but Tom and Luke are gone. As Sam gets up and heads towards the kitchen he can hear Tom and Luke talking, and a pan sizzling. Once in view, he sees Tom is making bacon and eggs while Luke gets some plates and silverware out. Tom glances back and sees him. He gently smiles.
“Morning Sam. Sleep well?”
“I-ah yeah. I did.” He reaches an arm back and scratches his neck. Careful not to blush, or anything near it. “ AJ’s still asleep. Want me to go wake him up?”
“Not just yet.. why don’t you help Luke set the table?”
“On it.”
Sam walks over and helps Luke set the table in silence. Just dished clinking against each other. Finally the silence is broken by Luke.
“Sorry about last night.” Luke mumbles. Just quiet enough Tom can barely hear.
Tom takes the hint that this conversation is one that should just be between Sam and Luke, and walks back to the den to “get AJ up.”
“What’s there to be sorry about?”
“I broke the deal that I had us make. I got too drunk and then I just-I just. I did what I did and I feel bad about it. We can forget about it all if that would make you feel better.”
Luke is breathing heavily and looks stressed. His hands are tight in his pockets, like he’s bracing himself. But Sam sets the rest of the silverware down and walks over to him.
“Luke. I think it’s clear that I broke that deal too. But honestly I-I I don’t know if I want to forget that. But you were drunk so I can’t tell if you really meant to do that but I just know I really want to do something about this.” He can feel his impulsive thoughts building. Maybe it would be okay just to give in to them for once. It could make things better. Or worse. But you can’t know until you try.
A sigh and a chuckle. “Like what Sa-“
He gets cut off by Sam’s lips. Sam puts his hands on Luke’s neck and pulls him closer. Luke wraps his arms around Sam’s waist. Luke lets himself melt into the kiss while Sam’s fingers gently toy with his hair, and after a little bit Luke finally pulls away.
“I don’t think forgetting about what happened is the right idea.”
“Me neither.”
They both lean in and kiss again. And again. And again. Giggling like little kids in between.
Tom and AJ are watching from the hallway. Like sneaky little kids, trying not to get caught.
Tom leans over to AJ’s ear.
“It’s finally happening AJ. I’m not sure if I can believe what I’m seeing.”
“Right? Finally.”
AJ dramatically scoffs and then chuckles.
Luke and Sam are now in a tight hug. Sam is gently rubbing Luke’s back. Luke just has his hands grasped tightly to the back of Sam's shirt. His head resting on Sam’s chest.
Luke wishes they could stay like this forever. He could feel Sam's chest moving as breathed. In and out. In and out. He slowly let their breathing sync. Breathing In and out. But together. That’s all he ever wanted. And if this wasn’t heaven, then what was? But he has to talk soon. He can’t let this silence sit any longer.
“I should have told you how I felt sooner instead of exposing myself while drunk. I feel so stupid for that and it must have been so awkward for you. I’m just sorry Sam. I really am.” His grip on Sam's back tightens a little bit.
“Luke, Luke, shh. It’s okay. Really. I should have done the same. I’ve felt this way for so long but I was just too damn scared. Too scared of an awkward situation. Too scared of making you uncomfortable. Too scared of ruining our friendship. And if you being a little tipsy was what it took for us to get to this point then it was worth it.”
Luke smiles and laughs a little. Sam has a gentle smile. He chuckles a bit as soon as Luke lets out a laugh.
“I was more than a little tipsy Sam.”
“Either way.”
Sam kisses Luke on the forehead, then one more time on his lips.
“C’mon. I see Tom and AJ looming over there watching us.”
He smiles at Luke. Then he sticks his tongue out at Tom and AJ and walks back to the silverware so he can finish setting the table.