Chapter Text
Yuujin coming back after being away for a long time
The first thing Yuujin felt was the warmth.
Even before he opened his eyes, he was greeted with the welcoming sensation of sunlight dancing across his face. He did not know where he was, but somehow, none of it mattered as long as he was resting in the light. He had almost forgotten what it felt like.
He should have forgotten what it felt like.
The second thing Yuujin felt was the guilt and grief. They slammed into him, colliding tides that threatened to swallow and drown him at the slightest provocation. The warmth on his cheeks was countered by an icy storm in the cavern of his chest, both battling for the upper hand in a war none would ever win.
The third thing Yuujin felt was the bitter whisper of memory. That was right. He had been there during the final battle against Leviathan. He had been taken over by the dark artificial intelligence that had started all of this in the first place. The truth had come to light, and it had surprised Yuujin just as much as it surprised those around him. He had never been a true human the way he had thought. It had all been a lie. Everything had been a lie.
Yuujin doubted he would ever forget what it was like to be sidelined within his own mind. He had been sealed away in some cage of Leviathan’s creation, forced to do nothing but watch on as his body acted to end the world. Leviathan’s power was complete and overwhelming, and no matter how much Yuujin fought back, he could never break through it for longer than a few seconds at once. There was nothing he could do.
But he couldn’t give up. He had to keep fighting. Yuujin didn’t care that he had been created for the sake of manipulating Haru or ruining his life. He was more than that. He wanted to be alive. He wanted to do all he could to make up for it. There had to be something he could do to fix this. He just needed to fight for it.
Maybe that was how he had managed to come back. Yuujin knew he should have been dead. He had died by his own hand so he didn’t force Haru to make the choice to kill him or the rest of the world. Yuujin remembered his final moments there in Haru’s arms, remembered the feeling of wet tears splashing across false skin. He had thought that would be the end. He had made his peace with it.
And yet, there he was. Yuujin did not know how it had happened or what could have prompted him to return, but he knew he was alive again. The light overhead shone brightly, and it was familiar in a way very little else felt like it could be after he had ruined so much. This was the same sun he had enjoyed so many peaceful days beneath. This was the same sun he had seen reflected in Haru’s eyes each time his friend cast him a smile. It was the same.
It was impossible.
Yuujin’s eyes opened slowly, and his body slowly returned to his control. He had to fight a lot more than he should have in order to force himself to sit up again. He felt like he had been pulled out of his body from a point at the back of his head, and now, his control over his limbs was as minimal as it could have been when he had to fight to reach them. To say he was exhausted was a grave understatement.
But Yuujin couldn’t let that hold him back. He had to find Haru. He had to find all of his friends and make sure they were alright… But most importantly, he needed to see Haru. Yuujin’s question from Minerva when he received his App Driver had been if he had a friend so dear he was willing to give his life for them. Yuujin couldn’t stand the idea of someone hurting Haru when he was not there to protect him. He had to make sure he was alright. Yuujin would find him. He had to.
Yuujin rubbed at his head, finding the sensation of his hair between his fingers familiar yet different. He hadn’t ever thought much of why his own skin felt different when compared to those around him. The difference was tiny, but Yuujin had picked up on it years before he knew what it meant. As such, he knew it immediately when he felt something had changed. This was not the same texture of his auburn hair. He would know it anywhere, and he knew this was not it.
Yuujin glanced around slowly, finding grass spreading around him in all directions. He had been laying down in a park, it seemed, and no one had bothered with disturbing him. That made sense; he could only imagine most people would be too afraid to go outside for a while after Leviathan’s downfall. Of course he would be alone.
Yuujin looked down at his hands and the rest of his body the best he could, though the world still swayed and spun like it was uncertain if it was alright to show him what he wanted or not. At a first glance, Yuujin looked exactly the same… Well, the same as he had before he was taken over by Leviathan. His clothing had changed then, but now, he was left in his casual outfit. It was like nothing had ever happened, but Yuujin knew better than to believe it had all been some nightmare he would pray he learned to forget one day.
And he had physical proof it had been real in the form of what he lacked. Offmon was nowhere to be found, and Yuujin knew he had likely been taken under the wing of the others in his life after his partner disappeared. Yuujin’s App Driver was nowhere to be found too, and no matter how desperately he fumbled for it, he knew his fingers would not find it. He was on his own.
But he couldn’t be for long. Yuujin forced himself to his feet, ignoring the way his legs threatened to cave in beneath him. He had always thought of himself as strong, but none of that seemed to matter now. It was hard to be strong in any way when he had been sent to the land of the dead and then cast back out of it.
Yuujin didn’t know how such a thing was possible. By all logic, he should have been dead… But he was glad that he was not. After all, he could go and find Haru and Offmon as long as he was alive. Yuujin would never forgive himself for leaving Haru alone, and so, he would not. Everything else could wait until he found Haru again.
Yuujin’s body moved on its own after he decided he needed to find Haru. He recognized the park as one he had visited a few times before the end of the world. It was easy to navigate his way out of it, and from there, he started off toward Kashinoki Books. Somehow, he knew Haru was going to be there. Perhaps going to the Shinkai household would have been a safer bet, but Yuujin knew where Haru was, and he wasn’t going to waste time ignoring his instincts.
Yuujin barely paid attention to the people passing him by on all sides. A whisper in the back of his mind told him to feel something, to be unsettled, by the fact that people were walking around after all that had happened. The crowds were thinner than they had been before the apocalypse began, but that did little to calm Yuujin’s concern. The world had moved on without him after the end of the world. It was as relieving as it was frightening, but all of it felt dulled and numbed compared to the racing of his heart that guided him toward Kashinoki Books.
The world only started to feel real again when Yuujin arrived outside the front door. He braced his fingers against the doorframe, finding the texture of the wood beneath his palm both familiar and different. It was like everything had been shifted ever so slightly to the right, a difference so minute most would not have noticed it, but Yuujin most certainly did. This was his life now, but it was not the electronic one he had come to know so well. Was this what human skin felt like? Was this the way everyone else in the world perceived the wonders of Earth?
Yuujin only managed to silence the chaos in his mind by pushing the door open. There were a few people milling about, examining the books and exchanging whispered words so as to not disturb those who were studying in the central area. Yuujin’s heart beat faster, and he glanced around in search of a familiar thread of green hair or a flash of a red jacket.
When he found it, he could have died then and there and perished happily.
He supposed he already had.
Haru was sitting at the table, a pile of books gathered all around him. The books seemed to detail matters related to programming and artificial intelligence. It was no surprise to Yuujin that Haru would choose to study something like that; after all, Haru was devoted to his friends above all else, and if he thought this would bring Yuujin back, then he would do whatever he had to in order to see it through.
The most shocking part of the scene came in the form of a small bow resting just beside Haru’s notebook. Yuujin recognized it immediately as the bow he had attached to Haru’s hair the day of their holiday celebrations that past December. Haru had laughed off the affection back then, but Yuujin saw the bow on Haru’s desk each time he visited the Shinkai home afterward. The bow was still perfectly intact, clearly a source of motivation as Haru focused on the remainder of his studies.
“Haru.”
Yuujin didn’t even realize he had spoken until after Haru’s name left his lips. He had arrived at the bottom of the stairs now, one hand braced against the guard rail like he thought it would make all of this feel more real than it was. Yuujin didn’t know what he looked like or if he was even smiling or frowning, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. None of it would matter when–
Haru looked up, and his pencil went still. As soon as his eyes locked with Yuujin’s, Haru froze for a moment that seemed to stretch on for an eternity. Haru’s face relaxed into a smile, and Yuujin could have sworn he saw tears beading at the corners of his friend’s eyes. “Yuujin!” Haru cried out. In an instant, his studies were forgotten in favor of rushing toward Yuujin and throwing his arms around him. Yuujin, despite being the stronger of the two, barely managed to keep himself upright from the force of Haru barrelling into his stomach.
Haru felt familiar yet different as Yuujin embraced him in return. Much like everything else, the world felt the same but ever so slightly changed, and Yuujin knew it was what it meant to be human. Haru had insisted he was a human even after hearing the truth that Yuujin was a robot, but for the first time, Yuujin’s body reflected what Haru had always believed himself to be. It was as beautiful as it was terrifying, and Yuujin couldn’t have said enough how glad he was to have been given this chance.
Haru only pulled away when he was certain Yuujin wasn’t going to disappear from his grasp. Haru was fully crying by now, not caring for the attention they were gathering from the others at Kashinoki Books. Yuujin could feel his vision starting to blur too, but it had nothing to do with the final wave of static that had overcome his eyes as he looked up at Haru when he died. These were tears just like the ones Haru was shedding. The water was cool across Yuujin’s flushed cheeks, but it did nothing to dull the heat rushing through his face. Nothing could ever bring him down from this high. He didn’t think he wanted anyone to try in the first place.
Haru sniffled and rubbed at his eyes, though he only rubbed at one before moving on to the other, seemingly afraid of letting Yuujin leave his vision for even a moment. “You… How are you here?” Haru asked softly. “I-I thought–”
“So did I,” Yuujin confessed. “I didn’t think I would ever be able to…” He couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence, so he instead pressed an unstable smile across his face and prayed it was enough to convince Haru that everything was fine. “I thought it was all over.”
Haru thought about it for a moment before he gasped, the pieces finally coming together. “It must have been the final App Realize!” he cried out. “The rest of us were brought out into the world again, and I guess that happened with you too. If it happened to my grandfather, then…”
Yuujin was on the verge of asking what Haru meant when he said that his grandfather had somehow been brought back through an App Realization, but he couldn’t find the words. Haru didn’t give him the chance to search for the question either, instead taking Yuujin’s hands in his own. “I’m so glad you’re here,” Haru murmured. “I-I was going to do anything I had to if I would be able to bring you back. I couldn’t just leave you behind after everything that happened, and…” He sniffled again and forced himself to smile through his tears. “I’m glad you’re here, Yuujin.”
For a long moment, all Yuujin could do was stare down at Haru. He forced himself to smile, and he blinked past the tears in his eyes. “I’m glad to be here too,” Yuujin replied. He pulled Haru into another hug, and the reality of his situation finally seemed to settle in around him. None of this was a dream. This was his life, and he was there with Haru as he had been hoping he would be all along. There was no Leviathan to get in his way of spending his days with Haru ever again. This was his life to lead, and Yuujin knew what he wanted to do with it before anyone could ever think to ask him for the details.
Yuujin let the world melt away as he cradled Haru in his grasp. Sooner or later, he would have to move on and focus on everything else waiting for him beyond the embrace… But he couldn’t bring himself to care. Right now, this was all that mattered, and he wouldn’t have had it any other way.