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Silver doesn’t know what to do about these feelings.
This fluttery feeling in his stomach.
the pounding of his heart.
the blood rushing through his ears.
the sweat on his palms.
All of these feelings because of one man that he shouldn’t have feelings for.
He shouldn’t.
Jamil Viper is off limits as one of Kalim’s friends, his brother as Jamil had called him just last week when they were studying, and Kalim pouted at him when he wouldn’t give him the answer.
He knows that Jamil is a good guy, knows that he’s really trying to be better with Kalim about how he feels, knows that he’s been released from servitude, but still helps Kalim anyway. He knows these things because he’s friends with Kalim, but also because he pays attention to Jamil.
Which is the problem as he stares up at Sebek who has his sword pointed under his chin.
They’re home, but Kalim and Jamil came to visit since Kalim is seeing Cater who happens to also be seeing Malleus.
They’re actually a throuple.
Silver could’ve never bet those three would be together, but honestly, after a year of these three, he can see it way too well.
“-still distracted! Kalim, Jamil, could you two go see how Malleus and Cater are doing with dinner?” calls Sebek in barely contained frustration as Lilia flutters down from his tree to also stand over Silver.
“Sure, Sebek! We’ll come let you know how close to finished it is when we know!” calls Kalim brightly, happy as usual.
Silver’s head flops back harshly against the ground when Sebek looks back at him with exasperated annoyance.
“You’re far too distracted recently, Silver. Do we need to talk about it?” asks Lilia with a tilt of his head but those eyes scream with mirth because his father knows what’s wrong.
Their little family are the only ones that know, not even Kalim knows, though he’s made remarks that hint at him knowing something. But Lilia is the one who told him what he was feeling.
He’s got a crush on Jamil Viper, and it’s decimating his focus.
“No, I don’t think there’s anything else to talk about excel for how I can stop getting so distracted!” huffs Silver frustratedly as Sebek steps back, sheathing his sword and offering a hand that Silver waves away. He forces himself up and turns to leave them. “I’m going for a walk.”
He doesn’t bother waiting for their responses his own frustration seeping into his words as he starts walking towards the palace gardens. It’s his favorite spot, and right now, he needs it if he’s going to deal with his brain and heart seemingly working together on the matters of romance.
It’s a ten-minute walk to reach the entrance of the garden maze, another ten to get to the middle where a large swan fountain pours while flowers grow along the edges and out to create seats for meals and such.
Enchanted is this garden, and it is quite the sight.
Silver stares down at the water once he reaches the fountain, watching it ripple with new additions of droplets from the swan waterfalls. His arms are crossed over his chest, he’s in uniform as per usual, and his purple eyes are locked on the rippling water.
“I can’t keep getting distracted like this.” mutters Silver to himself, needing to voice his complaints to the water rather than the others. “If I keep getting distracted, and an attack happens, I’ll end up getting someone hurt or worse killed by my negligence. I’m good at this, I’ve always been good at this, but now my mind is split between my duties and this infuriating crush. Why did I ever have to start liking Jamil Viper? Why can’t I get him out of my head? Why must I make a fool out of myself because of this crush?”
His chest is heaving, his hands curving though and gripping silver strands of hair.
“Why do I still want to know if he’d feel the same despite these frustrations?” murmurs Silver as he throws his head back, still gripping his hair between his fingers as he stares up at the sky that’s turning purple and pink with lines of orange in between as the sun descends.
“Why do I want to tell you that I do in fact feel the same?”
Silver freezes, eyes going wide as his neck starts to slightly ache from the position. He lifts his head and finds no one which means…
Jamil is behind him.
His cheeks are burning as he drops his hands to his sides and slowly turns his head to see if he’s in his peripheral vision… and he is.
“What’re you doing out here?” asks Silver softly as he turns to look at Jamil.
“Wanted to come check on you when I’d noticed you disappeared. You were gone when Kalim and I came to tell you all that dinner was just about done.” replies Jamil easily as he walks forward, getting almost too close to Silver as he steps just inside his personal bubble. “Silver, did you know that your eyes sparkle when you’re excited?”
Silver’s brows furrow at the observation, and he murmurs, “No, I- I didn’t know that.”
“I noticed it last year when you and Sebek were training. You’d just knocked Sebek to the ground, and your laughter rang through the air at your victory and amusement because he was pouting. But all I could see were these sparkles in your eyes.” explains Jamil softly, voice coming off in such a way that begs for Silver to understand what he’s saying despite the clearness of it.
“You noticed my eyes?” asks Silver before he remember what Jamil said first. “You have a crush on me too?”
“If by crush you mean having Romantic feelings for you that Kalim has been pushing me to confess about for the past year and a half, then yes.” replies Jamil softly, amused as his brown eyes sing with happiness that has Silver feeling like melting.
“Did you know that when you’re amused at people showing affection, but don’t want to show it in front of the others, you tug at the string of your hoodie?” asks Silver softly, as Jamil does exactly that, playing with the deep red strings of his Scarabia hoodie that Cater had fashioned for him when he complained about being cold the other day. “Yeah, just like that.”
“That stands to prove our feelings, but what do you want to do about them?” asks Jamil softly, still fiddling with the strings as he looks at Silver.
“Well, I don’t have much free time here, but I can definitely free up an hour or two… if you’d want to go on a date that is? I can plan it and everything.” offers Silver hopefully as he tilts his head to the side.
Jamil’s lips curve into a soft smile, one he’s never seen before, and it makes his heart sing. Jamil holds out one of his hands to Silver as he says, “I’d really like that, Silver. Just tell me when.”
“I’ll check with Father and the others and get back to you on that.” replies Silver as he takes the offered hand, intertwining their fingers as soon as the warm hand wraps around his cold one. “I guess we should get back, since dinner is supposed to be about ready…”
“We can walk together and take our time. It’s not like they’re in any rush.” says Jamil amusedly as they start moving.
“I guess you’re right.” murmurs Silver as his thumb rubs along Jamil’s thumb.
So, they walk hand-in-hand back out of the garden maze and to the palace. Silver leads them through the back entrance to avoid having to go up front again, which is a longer walk. But as they talk and laugh and share shy smiles, he thinks the longer walk is beyond worth it.