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Alec never planned for it to go like this. He never planned Magnus coming. (That must have been Izzy). He never planned to leave Lydia. (He also never planned for her to be fine with it.) (Did she already know?) (Was he that obvious?) (Fuck.)
He never planned to come out like this. He never planned to come out to his parents at all. What with the wedding and everything, he hadn't thought he would need to.
Then Magnus fucking Bane turned up.
It only took one look and he was breathless. One look and he suddenly lost track of everything. One look, one long, heartbreaking look.
And Lydia was fine. "I'll be okay," she said. As if she knew all along this wouldn't work.
He stood at the top of the stairs for a few moments. Or a few hours. Days? It was hard to tell. When he was staring at Magnus and Magnus was staring at him, time didn't even matter, didn't even happen, any more.
Maryse looked as Maryse always looks: like she just tasted something awful. But Alec didn't notice.
He saw Magnus. His eyes, his lips, his purple-tinted hair, his eyes, his lips, his lips, his lips, getting closer as he moved towards them, going fuzzy as he lost concentration for the few seconds it took for him to tell his mother "Enough," which basically meant "Go away," then parting slightly as Magnus got the gist of what was happening.
It was a spur-of-the-moment decision, really.
Magnus had always been the one with Alec wrapped around his finger. Alec had been okay with that, but this, this was so much better. He had his hands grasping Magnus' lapels, pulling him closer. Magnus had his hands by his sides. Alec felt like he had total control.
That was before he kissed him. A touch of the lips, and he lost everything.
He didn't notice Lydia let out a breath even she didn't realise she was holding.
He didn't notice Jace chuckle slightly, silently, as he looked on.
He didn't notice Izzy smile proudly.
He didn't notice the grin that burst across Simon's face, or the twitch of Clary's lips that said thank you and I'm so proud and so many other things.
He didn't notice as Robert and Hodge shared and awkward glance, then pretended it never happened. (Not many people noticed this. Only Brother Jeremiah, the one who could hear their thoughts as clear as any voice. He did not feel the need to share them.)
He didn't notice as Maryse, his mother who loved him and protected him for his entire life, opened her mouth with a look of disgust and betrayal. A look that said, who are you?
No, in that moment, all he noticed was how Magnus felt in his grasp, how Magnus tasted beneath his mouth, how Magnus followed his lips when Alec tried to pull away and catch his breath. Magnus. Magnus, Magnus, Magnus.
Somewhere deep in the darkness of his mind, Alec probably knew that this would cause problems, so many unfixable problems. But he also knew, deep down, that this would solve a few problems, too.
His mind was not on Jace.
His mind was not on Lydia.
His mind was not on the redhead, who, too, had caused countless problems.
His mind was on Magnus, only Magnus, and the fact he had him exactly where he wanted him.