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“Henry, I could kiss you!” Alex says with a wide grin.
As usual, Henry starts spluttering, but he seems to gather himself soon enough as he straightens his shoulders, juts out his chin and takes in a deep breath through his nose.
“You always say that,” he replies, voice shaking just slightly, “but then you never follow through.”
Alex’s heartrate spikes in an instance. His brain is working overtime, trying to come up with a witty reply, but all it’s capable of is some light buzzing while he stares at Henry, mouth agape.
Henry’s cheeks won’t stop going redder and redder, but his eyes are on Alex with an unwavering intensity.
And then he gets up and walks away.
Leaving Alex behind with all muscles incapacitated and his brain misfiring in all directions.
---
18 months before present day
Alex has been training for this thing for months and he refuses to let Henry fucking Fox ruin it for him.
He has met the man all of five times, six tops, and it’s already more than enough to last him a lifetime. Henry is rude, condescending, way too fucking privileged and a monumental snob. And that’s just the start of it, but Alex doesn’t have the time to come up with more descriptors because he has a boot camp course to win.
Fine, there’s no winning, technically, since it’s a charity event and it’s all about finishing and shit, but he’s gonna beat Nora for sure. And maybe Pez.
Probably not Pez.
It’s been nice, having an extra training buddy, someone to work with, someone to compete against, but why did he have to come with the most boring, lanky, unhelpful snooze of a man in tow?
June met Pez and Henry while she was working on an article on local shelters, and when she took a tour of the one owned by the Okonjo Foundation, Pez himself was the one who showed her around and promptly invited her, Nora and Alex to the next fundraiser.
That was a couple of months ago and, apparently, Pez and Henry are here to stay.
Now, Alex understands wanting to be friends with Pez. The man is energetic, gracious and, frankly, fabulous. Who wouldn’t want to be friends with someone like that?
Henry, on the other hand? Alex doesn’t see the appeal.
June and Nora love the guy though, so either they are missing something, or Alex is. And Alex is stubborn enough to think it’s definitely not him.
“Earth to Alex,” Nora says with a flick on his forehead.
Alex looks up from where he’s been bend over his right leg as he leans it on the short wall for a good stretch, like a dozen other people are doing right now.
“Trying to focus here, asshole,” he grunts in response.
He’s certainly not going to confess he’s been thinking about Henry, again, and how knowing he’ll be at the finish line is pretty much the opposite of motivational.
“If you keep it up, that frown’s gonna stay there for good, you know,” she goes on, pushing her finger in between his eyebrows now.
“What’s with the abuse?” he asks, batting her hand away.
“Psychological warfare,” she grins.
“Feels a lot like physical warfare, if you ask me,” he answers, doing his very best to look offended.
“Good thing I’m not asking then,” she shrugs and steps back to be able to hold onto Pez’s shoulder, who’s looking highly amused, as she pulls her foot up to the back of her thigh and holds it there.
“I’m thrilled I chose to participate with the two of you,” Pez says with a bright smile. “This is infinitely better than any form of entertainment I could be acquiring this fine weekend.”
“You say that now,” Alex replies. “Wait until we’re at the other end of this thing and then tell me you wouldn’t rather be at a spa, getting a nice massage.”
“Oh, but Alexander, don’t you know?” Pez says in his sweetest voice. “That will be our treat later.”
“June’s gonna have to pull double duty tonight,” Nora adds, setting her foot back down.
She cackles maniacally at the face Alex pulls with the flood of images attacking his brain.
“Yeah, let’s not, shall we?” Alex asks with a groan that’s only slightly exaggerated.
“Why not? When it makes your face go like that?” Nora asks with an accompanying squishing of his cheeks.
“And what a splendid face it is,” Pez adds with a chuckle.
Alex is saved from further torment by the sound of a horn, indicating they are about to start.
“Ready?” Nora asks the both of them.
She gives them each a slap on the back and jogs towards the start line.
“May the best man win,” Pez says, offering his hand.
“It’s not a race,” Alex says, ignoring the fact that it most definitely is and shakes Pez’s hand with a tight grip.
“Of course it’s not,” Pez replies, and with a meaningful wink, he steps off in Nora’s direction.
It’s brutal, the course that’s been laid out for them. Even months of training doesn’t feel like it was enough preparation. There are stretches of tyre jumping, wall and net climbing, mud crawling, traversing monkey bars, push ups and pull ups, and all of that is alternated with runs that span a couple of miles.
It’s excruciating and by the time Alex all but crawls across the finish line, he vows to never move a muscle ever again.
But there is triumphant music coming from the speakers, people are cheering enthusiastically and a proud grin spreads across his face.
He fucking did it!
A couple of feet over, Nora is lying down in the grass, fighting off a leg cramp with the help of June. Alex stumbles over and crash-lands next to her with a loud grunt just as Pez walks across the finish line with unfair ease.
“Good job, Alejandro,” Nora smiles, offering up her fist.
“You too, Noor,” he smiles right back, bumping it with the last of his energy.
“Here, Alex,” he hears Henry’s voice from above him.
He turns his head towards the sky and squints at the sudden brightness. Henry’s head is partly blocking the sun, making his hair glow like a halo, giving him an angelic vibe. He finishes off the whole saviour of mankind impression by handing Alex a bottle of water.
Alex doesn’t hesitate to take it, twists off the cap and downs half of it in one go.
“God, I could kiss you right now!” he says with a moan, closing his eyes to savour the replenishing feeling of the water hitting his tongue and going down his throat, giving him second life.
He opens his eyes back up just quick enough to notice the flustered surprise on Henry’s face.
That’s when it hits him, what he just said.
To Henry of all people.
Well, fuck.
“I… Well… That’s…” Henry mutters before he huffs and just sort of wanders off.
Well, okay, that was actually kinda fun, making Henry malfunction like that. So, on the floor, completely out of breath, possibly dying of exhaustion, Alex chuckles as he forms a new plan.
---
12 months before present time
Alex uses this newfound power sparingly. Over the last couple of months, he has learned other ways to make Henry splutter and blush, but none of them as powerful as threatening to kiss him.
To Alex’s surprise, they’ve become friends. Reluctantly, at first, but after one too many passionate debates, about whatever it is they’re debating about that evening, Alex has to admit he likes Henry’s passion and is actually curious to hear his opinions. Once the man starts talking, he’s not as boring as Alex accused him of being, nor as snobbish and uptight. Just a bit reserved and careful with who he trusts.
It’s still fun, teasing Henry a little bit, now that Henry gives as good as he gets. But Alex has learned that there’s a time and a place for their banter and he started recognising when Henry isn’t in the mood.
Tonight, though, Alex is too tired to deal with basically anything. He drops down on June’s couch like he’s dead weight and closes his eyes the moment his body touches the cushions.
“Bad day?” June asks him from the other end of the couch.
“The worst.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
“Wanna drink about it,” he grunts.
“Here,” Henry says from right next to him.
Alex opens one eye and is greeted by a soft smile and a beer.
“My hero,” Alex sighs, making grabby hands and grasping the cool bottle. Without really meaning to, he adds, “Could kiss you right now!”
He grins up at Henry, waiting for the blush to spread. Henry might have learned some control over his mumbling at Alex’s remarks, but he still can’t stop the colouring of his cheeks and top of his ears.
“Yes… That’s… Glad I could help,” he says with a chuckle and a small headshake. “Now, if you would be so kind as to move your legs…”
He taps the legs Alex has thrown on the couch and Alex moves them dutifully. When Henry sits down, he puts his own beer bottle to his mouth to take a couple of sips and Alex follows the movement with a lazy gaze, watching Henry’s throat move as he swallows.
He leans a little further into the cushions and pushes a pulled up leg against Henry’s thigh, the warm sturdiness of it lulling Alex into a sense of safety.
“Are we boring you, Alejandro?” Nora snorts when Alex closes his eyes again.
“Just resting my eyes for a second,” he mumbles in defence.
The next thing he knows, he wakes up, tucked into a warm blanket, his untouched beer gone, replaced by a glass of water on the coffee table. He gratefully chucks down the drink and turns over to get a couple more hours of sleep.
---
Three months before present time
“I don’t think I can move,” Alex complains with a small burp while stroking his stomach. “I live here now. I’m gonna become a couch potato and demand to be served.”
“By who?” Nora asks.
Alex turns his head to take in the others. All of them are splayed out on a piece of comfortable furniture or on Pez’s plush rug, most of them rubbing their own stomachs and all of them minutes away from a food coma.
“We haven’t had dessert yet,” Henry reminds them.
There’s a beat of silence before June makes a humming noise, obviously debating the pros and cons.
“I could eat,” Alex shrugs, fairly certain dessert will just fill in the gaps in his already overfull stomach.
“What is it?” Nora wants to know.
“Christmas crumble,” Henry tells them and Nora hums her approval.
“Did you make it?” Alex asks cautiously.
“Are you trying to assess if it’s worth the risk?” Henry asks with a teasing lilt.
“Well, sweetheart, even though your baking has been improving, it’s still about fifty-fifty on whether or not it’s gonna poison us.”
“No crumble for you then,” Henry deadpans before he hoists himself up from the comfortable chair with a groan. “And it’s from the bakery around the corner, you cretin.”
Snickering, Alex ducks down just in time to avoid Henry’s hand going for his curls.
A couple minutes later, Henry comes back with a tray and hands everyone a cake plate with a sizable serving of Christmas crumble on it.
Alex sighs contentedly when Henry hands him his with a small, genuine smile.
“Wouldn’t want you to starve to death.”
“Thanks,” Alex says quietly, distracted by the tingling sensation on the skin where Henry’s fingers just brushed his. “Could kiss you.”
He follows Henry’s movements back to his chair. He must not have heard Alex, because there is no reaction at all. No deep blush, no muttered rambling, nothing.
Henry simply sits down, makes himself comfortable and brings his fork to his mouth for the first bite. Alex forgets to eat his own dessert as he watches Henry’s lips curl around his, leaving behind a small drop of cranberry sauce at the corner of his mouth. Henry’s tongue peeks out to lick it up and Alex is completely mesmerised.
He’s hit with a sudden urge that completely blindsides him.
He wants to be the one to lick off the sauce. And maybe try and find out if Henry tastes like apple and cranberries now, or if maybe the taste of the wine they had over dinner would still linger there, or any of the dished they’ve shared.
He undoubtedly, absolutely, passionately wants to kiss Henry.
Not as a joke, not to tease or to coax a reaction out of Henry, but because he desperately wants to.
Which is a strange and overwhelming realisation to have after Christmas dinner.
With a twisting sensation in his stomach that has nothing to do with the amount of food he’s shovelled into his mouth today, he tears his gaze away from Henry, onto his plate, as he forces himself to take one bite after the other.
No, no. It’s the food and the wine, making his brain all loopy. It has to be. Because there’s no way in hell he all of a sudden wants to kiss a guy out of the blue. That’s just ridiculous.
---
Present day
Turns out, it wasn’t the food and the wine. It was Henry.
Henry, who had hurdled Alex into a sexual awakening, propelling him into his bi-alisation, as he likes to call it. Nora had wholeheartedly agreed with this description and has already started throwing it around, hoping it would catch on.
It’s been challenging, trying to figure out how to navigate a friendship while harbouring a crush at the same time as getting used to this new and undiscovered part of himself. It’s been exhausting, honestly, but after a couple of months and some exposure therapy, Alex is doing pretty good.
He has told June and Nora himself, and he is pretty sure Pez has an inkling, but, luckily, Henry doesn’t seem to have a clue.
Alex vows to keep it that way until this crush subsides or he finds another way to move on. All he has to do is stop himself from saying stupid shit like: “I could kiss you.”
Easy.
Well… most of the time.
Tonight feels extra challenging. All of them are gathered in Alex’s apartment to celebrate his birthday and the thought that his friends and sister have been putting into his gifts so far is bringing Alex to the brink of tears. The filters he has been putting in place are already failing him. He has called Henry ‘sweetheart’ twice already and sat down way too close, brushing their thighs together.
Look, Pez gave him a leather jacket in the colours of the American flag and June and Nora found a signed special edition of one of his favourite books about American presidents. He would have been grateful for a Domino’s gift card, but their thoughtfulness means the world to him and is making him unexpectedly emotional.
While Pez wanders into the kitchen to help June and Nora with the coffee and cake, Henry shifts in his seat and hands Alex a simple box with a bow on it.
“I hope you like it,” he says sheepishly.
“I already know I will,” Alex answers without a shred of doubt and lifts the lid with curious excitement.
The first thing he sees is a leather bracelet, not unlike the one he wears daily. As soon as he picks it up, his finger brushes the small metal piece, subtly engraved with the Rebel Alliance logo.
“This is fucking cool!” he exclaims, holding it closer to inspect it further.
“There’s more,” Henry tells him, bringing Alex’s attention back to the box.
“For real?”
He bites back his curiosity until the bracelet is secured on his wrist before he reaches for the envelope in the box. Quickly, he pulls out two pieces of paper. Tickets. His eyes are immediately drawn to the bold lettering at the top.
Star Wars Original Trilogy Screening Event
“What?” he asks, a bit flabbergasted while his eyes fly over the paper to soak up the information.
“Two tickets to a special screening,” Henry sums up. “There’s a special guest, and a costume competition, and they’ll be selling merch as well. It’s supposed to be really good.”
“Holy shit, Hen!” he says, his eyes flying between the tickets and Henry’s tentative expression. “This is incredible!”
“I hoped…” Henry says, sounding way too self-conscious. “Well, that is to say, I had hoped you’d consider me as your companion. You are in no way obliged to bring me, of course. There are two tickets and you can do with them whatever you like, but-”
“The fuck, Fox?!” Alex interrupts him, his lips spreading into a wide, happy grin. “Of course you’re coming with me. Are you kidding? Henry, I could kiss you!”
And that’s when, before Alex fully realises that he just said the one thing he wasn’t supposed to say, Henry, the brave motherfucker, gets past his spluttering and says: “You always say that, but then you never follow through.”
By the time Alex is fully functioning again, having assured himself he won’t die of cardiac arrest, Henry has joined the others in the kitchen.
“Oh, no you don’t,” Alex mumbles to the empty room.
He places the box and the tickets on the coffee table and stalks out the room.
“Excuse us for a moment,” he says through gritted teeth as he takes Henry by the elbow and yanks him towards the bedroom, ignoring the questions and hollers from the others.
“What are you doing?” Henry asks him as Alex drags him through the door and slams it behind them.
“What do you mean, what am I doing? What are you doing?”
“I was going to get some cake.”
“Don’t play dumb.”
“Alex,” Henry says, a breath escaping him.
He’s not frustrated though, Alex can tell. Probably nervous, judging by the eyes that are avoiding him and the ring he’s spinning around his finger.
“What did you mean by that?” he presses on.
He’s breathing heavily and is starting to feel light-headed, but he ignores it.
“By what?” Henry asks in a thin voice, his chest rising and falling in quick bursts as well.
“When I said-” Alex starts, but he has to stop to swallow around the lump in his throat. “You said I never follow through. What does that mean?”
Henry’s eyes flicker towards the door before they land on Alex, who’s brain is racing a mile a minute. Hope simmers in his gut, only to be dimmed by a wave of doubt and anxiety. It’s making him slightly nauseous.
“What do you want it to mean?” Henry asks with a wavering voice.
“That’s such a cop out,” Alex says, shaking his head. “I asked you first.”
“I think it is rather clear what I meant,” Henry says now, his voice shaky, but his eyes now steady on Alex’s.
Alex stares back at him for a good, long moment while he makes rapid mental lists with pros and cons, dos and don’ts.
“I could kiss you,” he whispers, after he concludes that all the signs point towards Henry possibly wanting the same thing.
“Wish you would,” Henry answers on a breath.
Alex’s brain needs a couple more seconds to absorb this new information, but when it finally sinks in, his hands immediately go to Henry’s hips to pull him closer. He tilts his head, waits for Henry to close the gap and pushes up onto his toes to slot their mouths together.
Henry’s hands come up to his shoulder and the back of his head. He feels Henry’s fingers drag over the skin beneath his curls, sending pleasant tingles through his entire body.
He gets a little lost in it, the way their lips slide together, the little sounds Henry makes, the sounds he makes. He feels safe, engulfed in Henry’s arms, completely surrounded by him. Warmth courses through his veins, his torso, his brain.
It feels both incredibly real and like he’s having a very good, very vivid dream.
Even after they pull back and Alex keeps his eyes closed as Henry softly presses a kiss on his forehead, Alex is still processing that yes, this is actually happening.
“Hey, Henry,” he asks, voice raw from emotions, “wanna go to this Star Wars thing with me? Heard it’s supposed to be really cool.”
“I would love to,” Henry says with a chuckle.
With a contented sigh, Alex rests his cheek on Henry’s shoulder and Henry wraps his long, strong arms tightly around him.
“Hey, Henry,” Alex says again, “can it be a date?”
“I want nothing more,” Henry whispers into Alex’s hair.
“Easy to please,” Alex chuckles.
“Darling, you just gave me what I thought I’d never have,” Henry replies with a stuttering breath. “I hadn’t dared to even as much as dream about anything more. A date with you would truly make me the happiest man on earth.”
“I’ll date you so much, you’re gonna explode with all the happiness,” Alex grins.
“What a way to go,” Henry laughs. “Where do I sign?”
“No, dork, deals like this are sealed with a kiss.”
A bit reluctant, but in hopes he’ll get what he wants, Alex pulls back to give Henry a daring look. Henry simply raises an eyebrow, which nearly sweeps Alex off of his feet with how fucking sexy he makes it look.
“Is that so?”
“Everyone knows that,” Alex grins teasingly, having the same effect on Henry, judging by the slight shudder.
“In that case,” Henry sighs, gently cupping Alex’s cheek with his hand, “thank you for educating me. Would you like to seal the deal?”
With Henry’s tongue peeking out to wet his lips as his hooded eyes hold onto Alex’s, Alex can’t think of a single word to say. Somewhere, he finds the brainpower to nod and a small smile appears on Henry’s lips as he presses their lips together.
As Alex and Henry disappear into each other’s embrace once again, one thought breaks through Alex’s euphoric mind:
He could kiss Henry for the rest of their lives.