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Jiro looks at his watch. He still has some time before Yuri is expecting him back. The house call to Clementia was cut short due to the honors student being needed urgently elsewhere. He could head back immediately, but Yuri will probably not appreciate being interrupted.
He can't really remember what he used to do with his free time on campus. He doesn't have much of it these days, and he doesn't feel particularly displeased by this fact. He can't miss what used to be if he can't remember why it's worth missing. He remembers things from before the accident distantly, but stuff relating to darkwick is basically gone from his mind.
Speaking of the past, and not remembering, though...
He can't remember the last time he saw his brother.
The last time he does remember seeing him was last year, but that can't be right. Zenji has always been a little clingy, and a little over protective, and Jiro is just sure that Zenji must have come by a million times to make sure that Yuri is taking proper care of him, even if Jiro can't remember it happening.
Maybe Jiro can extend some care back by paying his brother a visit. Such a visit will be gone into the fog of his memory soon enough, but Zenji will be able to remember it. That will have to be enough.
He still has the map his brother made him of Hotarubi. Zenji didn't want him getting lost in the rain, and he endeavors not to do so now. The rain is incredibly light today. The swirling mist is similar to the inside of his mind. Everything in washed out monotone, more obscured than not.
He can only hope the chill of the rain won't cause him to catch cold, and hope he won't get scolded for risking it.
The general admissions students give Jiro a wide berth, as they always do. The whispers of monster are less prominent here than other places he goes, no doubt Zenji's doing. Anyone caught saying something like that surely got a talking to from him.
He makes it to Zenji's dorm room before long, and knocks on the door.
The person that answers is not Zenji.
Did he get lost after all?
"Uh... can I help you?" the general admissions student who opened the door asks.
"I'm looking for my brother. Seems like I got the wrong room," Jiro says with a sigh.
"Really? Who's your brother? Maybe I can give you directions." It's an unexpectedly kind offer from a GA student.
"Zenji Kotodama."
The student frowns thoughtfully, crossing their arms. "I don't think I know him, sorry. You could try asking around, though."
"Could you tell me where your captain might be right now? He's probably the best person to ask," Jiro says, shaking his head. No point in picking through all the general admissions students who may or may not know Zenji, when Kagami should definitely know where the other ghouls are stationed.
"Oh, your brother is friends with the captain? Sure, I can give you directions."
-
Jiro finds Kagami's dorm easily enough with the general admissions student's instructions. The covered walkways smell of rain and wisteria in a way that feels nostalgic somehow.
Once he arrives, he notes that the door is not ideal for knocking on. "Kagami, are you home?"
Nothing.
"Kagami, it's Kirisaki Jiro. I was hoping you could tell me where to find my brother. The dorm I thought was his had someone else living in it, so I'll need directions to the correct one," he explains, hoping that will convince the ghoul to open the door.
No one comes to the door, but Jiro is pretty sure he can hear the faint murmur of a voice coming from inside the room. He can't make out the words, but it sounds like just one person. Is Kagami talking to himself?
Jiro waits a while longer to see if the door will open, and is eventually rewarded.
Kagami looks quite pale. His expression is troubled. "Hello, Jiro. You said you were looking for your brother?"
Jiro nods.
Kagami looks off to the side, though so far as Jiro can tell, there's nothing there to look at. "Well... Your brother is actually out on a long-term mission. It was given to him directly by the Chancellor, so I'm afraid I don't know many of the details."
Jiro can't help but frown. He doesn't remember Zenji coming to say goodbye. "How long has he been gone?"
Kagami looks away again, maybe trying to remember exactly how long. "It's been a few months," he eventually concludes. "He isn't able to use his phone while he's out, so don't feel disheartened if he doesn't answer you," he adds after another pause.
Jiro hadn't even thought of that, that he could have tried to text Zenji to find out where he was. Just as well, it would seem.
"I see. Well, thank you for letting me know. If you hear anything from him, tell him I said hi," Jiro says. He's running out of time if he wants to stick to his schedule.
Kagami gives him a smile that seems... whistful? Sad? Jiro isn't that good at reading other people's emotions, but it's somewhere in that ballpark. "I'll tell him," he promises.
Jiro walks off without further preamble. If he dwells on everything he's forgotten, he'll never have any piece. Zenji will forgive him for forgetting that he left. Zenji always forgives him in the end.
---
Subaru closes the door with a sigh, turning back to the room and to the ghost inside it. "Zenji... are you sure that was the right thing to do?"
Zenji looks near tears. "Forgive me, my friend. I know you dislike lying, but..." Zenji's voice frays, his lip wobbles, "I just don't want him to have to face the reality of my death again, if he's been able to forget it. I hate seeing him upset more than anything."
Subaru could point out that Jiro will definitely find out one day, could point out that Jiro could easily fact-check the lie Subaru just told, but he doesn't. He may be a cruel man, but he's learned to pretend he isn't. Zenji already knows all of this, surely. He doesn't need Subaru to remind him.
"I hope that what you told me to tell him gives him some peace of mind," Subaru says instead.
"All I want is for him to be safe and at peace," Zenji agrees.
It's really a shame that Darkwick isn't the sort of place where safety and peace can last.