Work Text:
Taehyung’s hands were itching to strangle the living daylights off of a certain someone. Now, Taehyung didn’t really advocate violence, he was this kind of a saint who didn’t even swat an annoying bloodsucking mosquito buzzing in his ear and apologized to plant pots when he accidentally knocked them over. But at that exact critical moment, glaring holes at the too bright screen of his smartphone, he was vehemently suppressing the urge to smack Park Jimin’s ass with a giant frying pan.
hey, wussup tae
have you eaten yet
there’s some leftover chicken in the fridge if you wanna heat it
hey there
just finished up that assignment thank god it was a pain in the ass
im not hungry yet
ill make me some ramen dont worry
oh cool then
my assignment is kinda rotting in the corner orz
istg youre basically living off with just ramen and coffee it aint healthy you shit
you need to work on that asap bro
you forgot energy bars lol
im bored, youre coming home right?
its due next week tho, it can wait
uh the thing is im gonna stay at yoongi hyungs place
he says hes too lazy to drive me back home lol
dont be too mad okay
ill make it up to you i swear
Taehyung rolled his eyes so hard to the point he thought they would stay there forever in the back of his head. To be quite honest, he saw this coming as clear as day ever since Jimin’s long time boyfriend dropped by their dorm to pick Jimin up for “A dinner date at my place, I’ll cook,”, which was Min Yoongi’s way of saying “I’m gonna bang him tonight on every surface of my apartment,” in an appropriate yet blatantly obnoxious manner. Taehyung visibly shuddered at that horrifying mental image, he was better off without knowing the vivid details of his best friend’s sex life with his boyfriend who had a permanent scowl glued to his face, skin looking so pale as if he hadn’t seen the bliss of a mere ray of sunlight in a century. And Yoongi couldn’t cook for shit, he once cracked an egg to a bowl and tossed the shell into the same bowl because he was a lazyass motherfucker like that and Jimin was no better either, he couldn’t even fry a sausage without roasting it to a burnt crumple. Taehyung, well lets say that he could at least make some decent looking and partially edible pancakes without much scathing and ending up burning down the whole kitchen in the process.
Cringing at those ridiculously lacking basic cooking skills, Taehyung glanced down at the screen again and snorted a little at the lame excuse. Jimin could at least put some effort and come up with something creative and liable, but not an obviously half-assed fib like this. Taehyung clicked his tongue in annoyance, the gears in his brain churning as he mulled over one hundred thousand possible ways to get back at his supposedly best friend. His eyes lit up as an idea popped up, his fingers dancing over the screen to type up a reply.
oh okay then
no im not mad
why would i really
btw should i prepare some ice packs for you?
wait, really???
youre not mad?
youre the best tae i love youuuuu <3
ice packs for what exactly?
its for your sore ass of course
i guess yoongi hyung served you so well that you can barely stand up
lmao
kim tAEHYUNG YOU FUCKING SHIT
i meant the food you pervert
like, you ate too much and and you can’t even stand up
so your ass must be sore with all that sitting
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN YOU ASSHAT
DONT BULLSHIT
oh really
was it good tho
i mean, the food
OH MY GOD TAEHYUNG JUST STOP
its so embarrassing jesus fucking christ
im taking back what i said
i hate you go away
im just kidding bro
you know i love you
i know bro
i love you too okay
im kinda feeling shitty bcuz i left you alone in the dorm
seriously chim, its okay
i was just messing with you earlier
besides you never got any time to meet him like in three weeks
just stop thinking about me and have fun okay
hmm okay
but seriously eat something
and dont stay up too late
and for the love of god, lock the door oKAY?
good night tae <3
woah there
got it mOM
im really really okay so dont worry too much
night jiminie <3
Taehyung locked his phone screen and tossed it on top of the coffee table, smiling as his sour mood had deflated in a considerable amount, if not entirely. Taehyung was having one of the shittiest days of his entire life; he was forty minutes late to his morning class, dozed off throughout the entire lecture because he couldn’t understand a shit about NMR Spectroscopy, poured a bottle of Oxalic acid on the lab floor and his professor kept him for an extra hour to clean up a shit ton of awfully dirty flasks and he praised the heavens above as he didn’t get an earful from his professor because it would be a horrible nightmare to begin with.
As if this severe case of bad luck wasn’t enough, he nearly served Mochas to two men in a formal attire, having a deep conversation about stock market and Espressos to a blushing couple, squirming awkwardly in their seats. Needless to say, he was given ultimately weirded out looks from his customers courtesy of that mix up and if not for Hoseok saving his sorry ass from his near fuck-up, he would have kissed goodbye to his part time job at the local coffee shop. It was shitty at the best, he knew, but as a broke college student majoring in Chemistry, he needed some money to pay the rent and bills, and to spend the rest on ramen and take-outs. And junk food and snacks, with a ridiculous load of energy bars and coffee because those were essentials in Taehyung’s guide of How To Survive Through The Shitstorm Of Finals Week 101.
Taehyung wasn’t this miserable, clumsy and whiny, he was polar opposite and far, far away from that. But this certain assignment had been a nasty bitch to him, he should have known when he ignored and let it rot in the corner that it would come back and bite him up in the ass, multiple times, quite painfully at that. He had spent all his free time and sacrificed two nights of sleep to get that shit done and over with, because the deadline was next day. He gave zero fucks over the fact that he just skilfully bullshitted through the whole assignment as long as it wasn’t blatantly obvious.
So, having gone through hell multiple times in a one day, nothing more he wanted than to cuddle up in the couch with Jimin for an intense ride of an anime marathon and to rant to his best friend on how traumatic his day was while stuffing his face with tubs and tubs of ice cream. But too bad the said best friend was busy having a date (busy getting fucked), and he had to resort into wallow in self pity as he didn’t have a significant other to wrap him up in a comforting hug and shower him with soothing words and cover him with warm kisses when he was feeling down.
He groaned and palmed his face because although he was so damn exhausted and in a need of a well deserved sleep, but at this rate he couldn’t quite wrap his mind about face planting to his bed. Sighing, he opted to have a warm and long shower instead, maybe getting freshened would relax him. It always did.
He sauntered to the bathroom, humming a trot song (which he didn’t know half of the lyrics of) on his way and swaying his hips to the rhythm. Turning the shower on, he actually moaned as the warm stream hit his skin, running smoothly down the expanse of his body. After a half an hour of belting out the latest album of Bigbang to his makeshift microphone (a.k.a Jimin’s favorite apple scented face-wash bottle), he turned the shower off, grappling his strawberry scented shampoo as he was magically done with washing his body during his mini concert, somehow. Lathering his palms with a good amount of shampoo, he carded his fingers through the damp hair, eyes closed in bliss, massaging his scalp and reveling in the pleasant scent, until he felt it.
The ghostly feeling of something crawling up his feet.
A shiver ran up Taehyung’s spine as he gulped. He took a sharp breath and cracked his eyes open to peer at his leg, his eyes widening at the sight greeted him.
A spider.
A giant black spider (he swore at least half a foot long) with extra long legs, slowly creeping up his shin to be exact.
He shuddered.
He couldn’t help the bloodcurdling scream left past his lips and resonated through the walls either. Like, really really.
It happened in a lightening speed, him shaking the spider off his feet, scrambling away to close the lid and climb up onto the the toilet seat, letting out more screams of horror in his wake. It really didn’t help that the spider was now on its way to the commode too, as if it was purposefully chasing Taehyung to torture him to no end. Glancing down at the spider with terror filled eyes, he stretched his hand out and managed to grab two towels from the rack. He waved the towels with flaying arms at the spider below in an (quite unsuccessful) attempt to shoo it away, but it seemed more like he was luring the spider with pom poms instead.
“Holy fuck, shit shit!” he screamed at top of his lungs, voice cracking midway to a sob, body shaking with fear. “Jesus fucking Christ help me!”
And in his panic induced, fear stricken state, he didn’t hear a door swinging open and the gasp followed right after.
“Oh my god- oh my god I’m so sorry!”
Taehyung snapped his head at the voice so quickly that he almost got a whiplash. Wincing, he flicked his glassy eyes up to squint at the stranger who was now rooted to his place at the doorstep, a hand on the door-handle and mouth slightly agape. The realization clicked in Taehyung’s head and he quickly looked down, face burning in shame as the current situation hit him right in the face like a freight train. He was there, standing on top of the commode naked, grasping onto two towels for his dear life, his hair a mess covered in shampoo.
Oh, how Taehyung wished he could evaporate into the thin air or the floor to open up and gladly swallow him.
Regaining his reflexes he covered his lower region (his last strand of dignity) with a towel in a flash and this put the stranger out of his paralyzed stupor as he coughed, then scratched his neck while simultaneously staring at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. Now that Taehyung was a tad bit decent for human interactions and not looking like a pornstar on a crack, he used this opportunity to scrutinize the stranger (who barged into his bathroom and gifted him a golden entry to add to his never ending list of The Most Embarrassing Moments Of Life) but Jesus Christ on a pogostick did the boy look damn gorgeous?
Sharp jawline, full red lips, cute nose, big doe eyes, eyebrows on point with jet black hair covering a half of his forehead and Taehyung genuinely wondered how anyone could look both cute and hot in the same time. The stranger nervously fidgeted on his spot, and Taehyung took in the broad shoulders, strong muscular thighs covered in gray sweats, and the well defined biceps visible even under the oversized baggy ass white tee he donned and Taehyung came into the conclusion that working out was this boy’s religion. He swallowed thickly around the lump in his throat because holy macaronis, he never found a boy to be this attractive before. He took a moment to wail in agony because he perpetually made a fool out of himself and royally fucked up all his chances to get to know him. Taehyung never hated his fate as much as now, but oh well, karma was a bitch and he must have ruined someone’s date in his past life to deserve this.
Shamelessly checking the boy out and lamenting internally, he didn’t notice the boy staring back at him with guilt filled eyes.
“I- uh, I’m really sorry for what happened, I swear it’s not like what you think. I’m not a creep or something, really, I’m not.”
Taehyung flicked his eyes up to stare at the way he talked, the tips of his ears flushed pink and were those bunny teeth? Taehyung thought this boy was a human embodiment of a scared bunny and god, could he get anymore cute?
Due to Taehyung’s lack of response (a.k.a staring stupidly at the boy and internally gushing over how cute he looked), the boy got slightly alarmed and he hurried to explain himself further. “You screamed, like really loud. And I was passing by and I couldn’t ignore it because you didn’t stop screaming and you sounded like you were hurt! And- and also my roommate kinda slipped in the bathroom and broke his arm awhile ago, so, I- uh, I thought you needed help. The front door wasn’t locked too, and I-”
Taehyung wasn’t sure why his heart fluttered but he deemed that it had something to do with how embarrassed the boy looked and how he stammered in his speech. Taehyung was may or may not mentally patting himself on the back for his weird habit of forgetting to lock doors.
Meeting with the silence once again, the boy now really got panicked as he opened his mouth and closed it again, and Taehyung mentally smacked his head for unintentionally scaring him. And Taehyung didn’t really mind making pet-names for this boy for the rest of his life.
“It’s okay. I don’t mind. I know you didn’t mean to barge in like that and it was an accident. But really, it’s okay, don’t worry.”
Taehyung said as soothingly as he could muster at the moment and flashed his trademark box smile at the boy and it seemed effective as the boy visibly relaxed; relief washing over his face and smiled back in return, bunny teeth on full display and eyes crinkling and Taehyung swore his heart stopped for a moment. That smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life and he didn’t mind seeing it everyday either. Taehyung wondered how fast his strongly built walls were crumbling into pieces before this boy. This boy is dangerous, indeed.
“So, um- I’m sorry again for disturbing you and I think it’s my cue to leave, so, uh it was nice meeting you? Have a nice day-”
“Wait! Don’t leave!”
The boy looked perplexed at the sudden outburst and Taehyung didn’t give two shits about how desperate he sounded, but he didn’t want him to leave. The boy furrowed his eyebrows, obviously expecting an answer and suddenly Taehyung remembered why he was screaming like a banshee in the first place, his gaze landing on the culprit who was now happily climbing up the shower curtain and he let out a not so manly scream, startling the clueless boy.
“The- the spider!,” he stammered, pointing a finger at it, and dismissed the fact that he 456% looked like a damsel in distress. “Don’t leave me alone with the spider! Please!”
The boy’s curious eyes followed the direction Taehyung was pointing at and he expected the boy to laugh out loud or give him an ultimate What The Fuck look, but nothing could prepare him for this.
“You want me to take it away? Is that why you screamed?” the boy’s expression melted into a serious look, as his concerning eyes studied Taehyung and Taehyung couldn’t stop his heart swooning over him.
Taehyung nodded eagerly and the boy broke into a hearty laugh at that and Taehyung melted into a puddle of goo in 0.03 seconds.
“Okay,” the boy said, stifling a chuckle and Taehyung’s gaze followed him treading into the bathroom and grabbing a tissue from a box near the sink, approaching the spider with cautious and calculated steps. Taehyung watched with amazement as he easily caught the spider in a one move and he swore on his iron man socks that he didn’t stare at the way the boy’s arm muscles were flexing. Nope, definitely not.
“It’s really tiny though,” the boy commented, gaze concentrated on the offending creature and Taehyung shrieked as he tried to squirm away and nearly falling on his ass. “I’ll be right back,” the boy flashed him a cheeky grin as he left and Taehyung precariously climbed down from his spot and waited with bated breath, he half expected the boy to not return back. Why would he, anyways? Taehyung was just a weird stranger to him. But all of those gloomy thoughts vanished into the drain as the boy returned with a victory grin, proudly exclaiming “Done, everything’s okay,”
Taehyung shakily exhaled and he didn’t even know that he was holding his breath and he couldn’t exactly pinpoint the reason for the immense relief flooded his entire form.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t worry, it’s okay,” the boy assured and Taehyung bashfully looked down, fiddling with his fingers, feeling uncharacteristically shy.
“So, um, I’m gonna, head back I guess,” The boy started, his doe eyes looking hesitant, “I hope I’ll see you around,”
“No wait.”
The boy looked positively surprised, caught offguard again, and Taehyung quickly gathered all his courage to ask the most crucial question gnawing away at his insides this whole time, “I didn’t even get your name,” he paused a bit, “and I want to properly thank you for helping me out.”
The boy’s eyes lit up at the question, “I’m Jeongguk, Jeon Jeongguk,” he answered, “and you don’t have to thank me for that, it was nothing, really.”
“But I want to,” Taehyung protested, morphing his face into his infamous kicked puppy look which he used on Jimin to buy him extra packs of chocolate bars and to escape from doing laundry, “And I’m Kim Taehyung by the way, but just call me Taehyung,”
“Taehyung,” The boy tested the name on his tongue and and Taehyung thought it sounded heavenly. “But really, it’s okay Taehyung,” he paused, his expression turning smug as his eyes glistened with mischief, “unless you don’t want me to leave,”
Wow, okay, did he just flirt with him?
“Oh,” Taehyung gasped, and for the first time he was couldn’t form any coherent thoughts and completely speechless in front of someone. He figured that all his social skills went down the drain.
“Would you like to have some ramen with me?”
Holy shit, what the fuck was that? Taehyung wished he could stop and rewind the time back and grab those words hanging thick in the air and shove them down into the deepest pit. He never cursed at his lack of brain to mouth filter this much in the entire span of his twenty one years of life.
“Of course, why not?”
Taehyung internally squealed (and did a victory dance later.)
♥
“Gukkie.”
Jeongguk hummed from his spot on the floor with his back leaning against the couch comfortably, biting the end of his pen as he struggled with knitted eyebrows to solve his physics question, Taehyung’s legs dangling from his shoulders.
(“So you’re telling me... that you’re majoring in physics?”
“Yeah, I guess. I’m a boring person, aren’t I?”
“Are you kidding me? It’s so fucking cool! I’m a Chem major too!”
“Wow, really?”
“Yeah, that makes us The Younglings Of Science, we can conquer the world together, Jeonggukkie.”
“Jeonggukkie?”
“Ain’t that cute? You don’t like it?”
“No! I lo- I mean, yeah, I like it.”
“Good, aw, fluffy bunny.”
“What?”
“Nothing, Jeonggukkie.”)
“What’s it baby?”
Taehyung slightly flushed at the endearment, he wasn’t quite used to it even after an year and a half of dating Jeongguk. He felt a gentle pair of lips grace his skin and he glanced down, heart skipping a beat at the sight of Jeongguk dropping a soft kiss on his knee.
“Baby.”
Jeongguk prodded, his voice warm, looking up and locking gazes with Taehyung, one of his perfectly shaped eyebrows raised in question.
“What do you think about, you know, our first meeting,” Taehyung spouted absentmindedly and Jeongguk’s face reflected an amused expression. Taehyung promptly regretted letting it out. Almost.
“Why so suddenly?”
“Nothing, I just kinda wondered.”
“So you’re asking me,” Jeongguk started, the telltale signs of his lips forming something akin to a smirk and the playful glint in his eyes put Taehyung into a halt Taehyung immediately contemplated over his life decisions. “about what I thought of you trying to impress me with a bowl of ramen?”
“Shut up.”
“Or is it about how you seduced me wearing nothing but a towel, and pleading me to not leave you?”
“I didn’t seduce you!” Taehyung protested emphatically with flaming ears.
“But indirectly, you did Tae.”
“Did not! I was just afraid of the spider in case you forgot.”
“And I totally saw you checking me out, like, you were practically staring holes into my biceps.”
Knowing that Jeongguk wasn't planing to let him live this one down, Taehyung delivered a hit to the said bicep and he winced in pain as it was like he was punching a brick wall. Stupid muscle pigs.
“Ow hyung, that hurts,” Jeongguk feigned pain, rubbing his arm quite dramatically and Taehyung just rolled his eyes.
“I hate your stupid biceps.”
“But that’s not what you said when we made out in the gym-”
“Oh shut it,” Taehyung groaned in embarrassment while covering his face with hands. He heard Jeongguk chuckling before he felt Jeongguk untangling his legs from his shoulders, a weight pressing down next to him on the couch.
“Hey,” he took Taehyung’s hands into his hold, looking into the warm brown eyes. “I don’t know what I felt that day, but hell, I just wanted to meet you again.”
Taehyung gasped with the sudden confession. It wasn’t like that they never confessed, they always exchanged I love you’s and I miss you’s almost everyday, but this was whole another thing coming from Jeongguk.
“You wore clothes with holes, your living room looked like it went through a hurricane and oh god, the ramen was salty but I didn’t give a shit because I hadn’t ever felt so comfortable and happy spending time with someone. I never thought binge watching anime and playing Mario Kart with you would be so much fun and I didn’t even know it was already past midnight when I finally left. Of course you didn’t let me go because it was so late and then you asked for my number and I felt like I was hallucinating. But then I thought you’d just forget about me because you had so many friends and I was just an awkward freshman but then you texted me everyday bitching about your lab partner and teasing me about my iron man socks and spamming me with emojis- do you know how much I hated those emojis until I met you? And then we became so close. It was like I had known you for a long, long time. When you always dropped by to see me after my dance practice, I felt this weird feeling in my stomach and I wanted to show everyone that you are mine. Shit- oh my god this is so cheesy and I understand if I made you cringe-”
“Jeongguk.”
Taehyung cupped his face, his eyes a bit glassy and his voice a little shaky. And Jeongguk glanced up to see him smiling broadly.
“Silly bunny, that was cheesy, even for you,” Taehyung chuckled, pinching Jeongguk’s cheeks and Jeongguk huffed, trying to swat his hands away. “but I love it,”
“You do?”
“Yeah, because you’re my personal favorite bunny.”
“Jesus, you’re worse than me, Tae.”
“I know, but you love me.”
“You wish.”
“Hey, don’t be mean.”
“Okay okay, I love you.”
“Love you too Guk.”
“Can I kiss you?”
“Do you even have to ask?”
And that was how Taehyung found himself pinned down to the couch cushions, Jeongguk’s broad frame hovering him, his strong arms on either side of his head. The innocent, sweet kiss had become deep and passionate in mere minutes and Taehyung didn’t find himself to care as Jeongguk was kissing the living daylights out of him, his tongue doing wonders inside Taehyung’s mouth, making his toes curl.Taehyung carded his fingers through his smooth black strands, tugging them softly and then Jeongguk rolled his hips down, grinding on him painstakingly slowly and reminding him how great of a dancer he was and Taehyung couldn’t help the drawn out moan left past his lips.
“Babe wait.”
“What’s wrong?”
Jeongguk pulled back, panting heavily and Taehyung wasn’t any better, trying to catch his breath while simultaneously fishing out his phone from the back pocket.
“A message from Jiminnie.”
Jeongguk sighed and clicked his tongue in annoyance. “Cockblocking us since, dunno, 1995?”
“It’s because we’re best friends, Guk.”
“Right.” Jeongguk grumbled.
“Right.”
“Okay, what’s he saying though?”
“Uh, he says he’ll be back home with Yoongi hyung, in two minutes?”
“Wait what? Aren’t they supposed to be in a date?”
“Oh there he says he bumped into-”
“Tae, both our dicks are hard,” Jeongguk deadpanned, face impassive, effectively cutting Taehyung off.
“Holy shit?”
“Indeed. Didn’t you say they sexiled you back then?”
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Taehyung asked, one eyebrow raised, a sly smile adorning his lips and his hands sneaking up to wrap around Jeongguk’s neck.
“Hell yeah.”
♥
(“Oh my god my eyes. Can't you even shut the fucking door?”
“Yah Kim Taehyung! How could you fuck on our couch? And we eat there sometimes!”
“Gross. I can’t believe this!”
“I’ll murder you, both of you.”
“Go away Jimin.”
“Jeon fucking Jeongguk I swear to god!”)
♥
(“Tae.”
“Mmm?”
“Lets go bungee jumping.”
“Oh fuck-Huh?”
“As in, a date. You know, the last time we went paintballing, or was that skiing?”
“Jeon Jeongguk- Oh shit- I can’t believe you’re asking me this in the middle of having sex.”
“Well, we’re kind of unique, aren’t we?”
“Of course, you cocky little-”
“I know, my cock is-”
“Oh my god, shut up!”)
♥