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Before them, the wall glowed and sang. Since waking up randomly in Spira after being eaten by a whale-demon which was supposed to be his father, Tidus had been in a constant stunned state. Not that he hadn't been stunned by life in Zanarkand, one thousand years ago, but this was different! Before, the bottle-blond had been stunned by crowds, the fans camping outside his house, and the sky when he left the metropolis. Now, he was stunned by singing statues, huge-ass monster which appeared from no where with the wave of Yuna's staff, and insane blue hair. Seeing a glowing wall sing never grew old.
Urk, Rikku was fighting with Auron again. Wasn't that some kind of flirting? Shuddering, Tidus approached the wall of Fayth. Not only was Auron older than Rikku's father, he was dead. In Tidus' experience, bouncy energetic blonde girls become cheerleaders and get with jocks, not dead guys. But he wouldn't say anything like that – then Rikku would come after him. Noooo thank you, slut. Tidus was into smart, sexy chicks, like Yuna. Especially after being rejected by that damn goth, Lulu.
Deciding it was time to put an end to it, Tidus readied his catchphrase. Every celebrity has one. "Auron's right," he announced. No doubt Auron was. He was annoying like that.
"Huh?" Rikku pouted in disbelief.
"This is… this is my story," Tidus announced, cherishing the words as they left his mouth. It was the fifteenth time he spoke those blissful words – today, that is.
Suddenly, his body jerked. "Whoa!" Tidus cried, before slipping into darkness.
Groaning, Tidus crawled to his feet. Scanning the room, his face contorted with confusion. This didn't look like anywhere in Spira. It was all metallic and polished, not wooden or stone.
"Welcome home," a familiar voice called. Turning around, Tidus' eyes fell on a kid dressed in a sleeveless purple top, hood pulled up to hide his features. It was the creepy kid! The creepy kid who had told Tidus not to cry! TIDUS DOES NOT CRY! TIDUS IS A MANLY MAN! MAAAANLY! DAMN YOU JECHT! TIDUS HATE YOU!
"You…" Tidus growled.
"Remember me? We met in Bevelle," the creepy kid replied… creepily.
Suddenly, the creepy kid vanished and was replaced by something even creepier – Wakka's hair.
"What's gotten into you? Hey!" Wakka yelled. Tidus assumed he was angry, but as always, he was too distracted by the gravity-defying wave of orange.
"Wake up! Wake up!"
Two and two finally connected in Tidus' mind. "Wait… this is a dream."
"Precisely," the creepy kid replied. Where did he keep appearing from!? Tidus wanted Yuna in his dreams, not some jailbait ten-year-old!
"A dream? Are you crazy? I don't have time to be dreaming now!" the bottle blonde cried, releasing his anger tactfully.
"You're wrong," the creepy kid said, smiling wryly. "It is not that you are dreaming. You are a dream."
"Huh?" Tidus said, mind descending into "WHAT THE FUCK DO THESE PEOPLE SMOKE?!" He completely lost it. There was no way to completely understand what this kid was on about – something about a machina war, the Summoners of Zanarkand dying, and preserving everything as a dream. This was just like not beating wives; it was way beyond what a sports star could comprehend.
"Perhaps a song will make my point clear," the creepy kid sighed. "I am just a dreamer, you are just my dream."
"OH! I get it!" Tidus cried. "You're a Fayth! Fayth dream about this Zanarkand, and you're sick of it! You don't want to dream anymore, so you wanna wake up, and… eh… how?"
"Defeat Sin," the creepy kid sighed. "And when we dreamers stop dreaming, our dream…"
"Will go back to Zanarkand with the sexy Lady Yuna?" Tidus asked hopefully.
"…sure."
"Sweet!"
Speak of the babe and she will appear. "Wake up! Please, wake up!"
There was no need to tell Tidus twice, baby.