Actions

Work Header

Amandus in Aeternum, Quamvis Peccatum

Summary:

Amandus in Aeternum, Quamvis Peccatum is Latin for Loved for Eternally, Despite being Sin. It sums up Fyodor and Atsushi's relationship perfectly. Whether Atsushi is aware of their connection or not

—————

Fyodor Dostoevsky has a son but for reasons yet to be known, gives him up. However he's back now and would love to use that son of his. Whether or not the child knows he's being used or not.

Notes:

Hi! Thank you for picking this up in the sea of fics. However, before you get into this, I want to explain some things because I didn't know how to fit this into the summary!

1) This is a rewrite of the whole series. I plan on rewriting the entire manga but with Fyodor as Atsushi's parent.

2) I'm changing around a lot of events to fit the story better, so it won't be entirely like canon.

Anyways that's it! Have fun reading and feel free to leave your thoughts. I love interacting with commenters! <3

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Drowning in Hunger

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Part I — A Child Beneath the Moonlight

 

Chapter 1: Drowning in Hunger

 

A boy, barely aged eighteen, was lying down on the ground, and his body hunched over in hunger. Due to some unfortunate circumstances, he has been left at death's door. The boy could only wearily stand up in his weakened state.

 

The boy had choppy hair that was cut at strange angles. His hair was mostly white, but it did have a purplish hue to it. On one side, where the bangs were much longer than the rest of the hair, a dark purple stripe could be seen running through it.

 

His eyes were unique as they both had heterochromia. The top of the iris was a bright purple, and the bottom was a golden yellow. His skin was a slight pale, and he had a rather slim build due to malnourishment.

 

The young man had been kicked out of the orphanage, where he used to stay. He now had no food or shelter, and he wasn't brave enough to steal. All he could do was let memories of the past run through his mind in a torrent of self-doubt and pity.

 

He was currently staying under an old bridge. It provided a roof when it rained, and it was relatively hidden. It wasn't ideal, but it would work for the moment. It wasn't as if he planned to stay for long. The river to the right provided some comforting white noise at night when unease reared its ugly head.

 

He unfortunate boy had to rob survive, so he had to steel himself. He refused to die in some ditch. He could practically hear the adults at the orphanage ring in his ears in a cacophony of thoughts. Those words they'd yell and scream at him like a mantra to live by.

 

'We have no need for your ilk!' They'd say with disgust. They never wanted him. They never needed him. He was mere dead weight. A stain on the walls of the orphanage.

 

'Find yourself a ditch somewhere in which to curl up and die!' They'd scream in rage. They truly wanted him dead. Who would care for the useless? They certainly wouldn't.

 

Well, the boy refused the notion. He wouldn't give in to the people who hurt him so much. He resolved to attack the next person he saw and take whatever money they had for himself. It wasn't long before he heard the sound of a person coming, so he turned around, ready to steal whatever the person had. Only all he saw was a man floating down the river upside down with his legs up in the air.

 

He wanted to wait until someone else came along, but... what if that man drowned. No matter how he tried to ignore it, the thought of that man dying was enough to move him. Without another thought, he dived right into the water and swam to pull him out.

 

After pulling him out, the man just laid their unresponsive. The man was covered in bandages and wore a tan trench coat. It wasn't a stretch to say his appearance was odd. As the boy caught his breath, the bandaged man suddenly opened his eyes and sat up quickly.

 

The boy jumped back startled by the sudden the sudden movement, but concern takes hold quickly. "... are you all right? You were swept up by the current..." The boy asked the strange man, his voice laced with concern.

 

"I'm saved than?" The man asked despondently. He seemed oddly disappointed for a man who'd just been saved. "... tch." He eventually clicked his tounge in annoyance at... surviving?

 

'Did he just say tch?' The boy thought in bewilderment. What kind of guy was mad at being saved? It made absolutely no sense.

 

"Was it you who interrupted my asphyxiation?" The bandaged man asked.

 

"'Interipted'? I was trying to save you -" The boy stopped for a moment, processing what the strange man had said. "... asphyxi- what?" The boy asked, getting more confused by the second. 

 

"Apologies, are you unfamiliar with the term?" The man asked, oddly polite for someone who just seemed so annoyed. "I meant to convey I was committing suicide." The man reiterated, as if it explained everything.

 

"Huh?" The boy questioned, not understanding what was taking place.

 

"I was endeavoring to shuffle of this mortal coil, and you had to involve yourself..." The man said as he sighed out, "Such a bother," under his breath. He looked well and truly annoyed at the fact that he was breathing.

 

"Uh... okay? The boy said, still confused, but he didn't want to annoy the man further. 'Huh. Why's he mad at me?' Was all he could think with this strange man talking.

 

"Ah, well..." The man sighed again. "... my intent was to pursue a clean, pure suicide - one that imposed on no one." He said as he finally stood off the ground. "And yet, you were nonetheless entangled. I must offer some sort of recompense for this awful imposi-"

 

Before the man could could continue, the boy's stomach growled loudly. They both stared at each other blankly for a moment. "... are you hungry, lad?" The man eventually asked.

 

"I... I actually haven't had anything to eat in several days..." The boy said hopefully. There was a chance this stranger could feed him, and he wanted to take it.

 

Before the man could reply, however, his own stomach growled. "Nor have I... and the river absconded with my wallet." He said blankly, as if discussing the weather.

 

"Huh? I thought you'd at least treat me to lunch for rescuing you!" The boy exclaimed, feeling irritated from hunger.

 

"Hm?" The man inquired with a tilted head. 

 

"Don't 'Hm?' Me!" The boy yelled out in frustration. The boy was getting ready to lose it before a loud call could be heard from the other side of the river.

 

"Hellooooo!" An angry yell can be heard. "Is this where you've been, you stupid oaf?" The person, a man, yelled.

 

The man was blond, with long straight hair coming down from his head into a ponytail. His eyes were a dull green and covered by rectangular glasses. His skin was a light tan, most likely proof of working outside.

 

The man was well dressed, wearing a black dress shirt underneath a tan suit vest. Around his neck was a red bolo tie partially hidden underneath his color. His was also wearing tan corduroy pants that matched his vest and brown leathery loafers.

 

"Oh! Kunikida-kun! Thanks for coming!" The strange man cheerfully called over to the blond, Kunikida, apparently. The man waved his hand in cheerful greeting despite Kunikida's obvious anger.

 

"You have subjected me to a great deal of grief today, you suicide obsessed maniac!" Kunikida angrily yelled. "Why must you constantly ruin my plans...?" He continued to shout.

 

"Ah, yes! I have a smashing idea, my lad. That is my coworker. Perhaps he can feed us!" The strange man said with a bright cheer to his voice. He seemed pleased with himself for even coming up with the idea.

 

"Huh?" The boy said, still confused at just what was happening.

 

"Listen to me, you!" Kunikida continued to scream in vain. Both the boy and the bandaged man were completely ignoring him.

 

"What is your name?" The strange man asked the boy.

 

"Um, Atsushi Nakajima, but..." The boy, Atsushi, said nervously.

 

"Well, Atsushi-kun, follow me. What sort of food do you crave?" The man asked cheerfully, leading Atsushi over to Kunikida.

 

"Um... well..." The boy started nervously. It had been some time since anyone offered him anything. "... some chazuke would be nice." He finally said, surprising the other man, causing him to laugh.

 

"Ha-ha-ha! A child mere inches from death, seeking a bowl of chazuke?" The man laughed out, looking sufficiently amused. "So be it, then. I'll have Kunikida-kun treat you to thirty or so bowls if you like!" The man boomed as he barked with laughter.

 

"Stop being so generous with my money, Dazai!" Kunikida yelled angrily from the other side of the river.

 

"Dazai?" Atsushi asked, looking at the bandaged man.

 

"Yes. That is my name." The man, Dazai, said. "Dazai... Dazai Osamu." Dazai introduced himself as wind blew past them.

 

Dazai's brown, wavy hair lifted in the wind, blowing past his face. His brown eye stared at Atsushi, and a smirk grew on his charming face. His pale skin contrasts with the darkness of his hair and eyes.

 

He wore a black vest with a white dress shirt underneath. Over top of it was a long tan trench cost that seemed slightly too big. Tied around his neck was a bolo tie pinned in place with a blue gem brooch. Around his neck and wrists were bandages covering every inch. His dress pants were off-white, and his shoes were black loafers.

 

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

 

The three men were now sitting inside a teahouse, and Atsushi was eating away at bowl after bowl of chazuke. It was strikingly obvious the boy hadn't eaten in days just by how much he ate. Kunikida, on the other hand, just looked irritated.

 

"We have to return to work, Dazai." Kunikida said irritably as he tapped a finger on the table. He brought out a notebook and looked through it with vigor. "What kind of fool says 'Oh, what a fine river' and dives in headlong during work hours?! Look what you've done! Now we're hideously behind schedule." Kunikida continued angrily.

 

"You do love your appointment books, don't you, Kunikida-kun?" Dazai asked nonchalantly.

 

"It's not an appointment book! These are my ideals! The precepts that guide my life!" Kunikida yelled, slamming the book against the table. "And nowhere does it advise partnering with a suicide aficionado!" He angrily continued.

 

"Mfh nf mnrrginian frnmn?" Atsushi asked, his voice muffled by the mouthful of food.

 

"Silence." Kunikida said, picking his notebook back off the table. "My financial ledger says nothing about 'feeding a foundling all the chazuke he wants' either." He said strictly.

 

"Hngh rmmh?" Atsushi questioned further.

 

"I sand - we are working! The military police assigned us to corral a ferocious-" Kunikida started yelling, slamming his fist to the table.

 

"How are you speaking to each other?" Dazai asked in the back but went completely ignored.

 

"Whew! What a meal!" Atsushi said with dozens of empty bowls in front of him. "I don't even wanna see chazuke for another ten years!" He exclaimed contentedly with a big smile on his face.

 

"You..." Kunikida grumbled.

 

"You guys sure saved my hide, though!" Atsushi said thankfully. "Ever since I got kicked out of the orphanage and arrived in Yokohama, I've been homeless and starving. I feared I'd meet my end soon!" Atsushi explained.

 

"Oh? You come from a children's home?" Dazai asked.

 

"I did... until they booted me, yeah." Atsushi said with a depressing chuckle. "Something about lack of funding and having to downsize..." He continued.

 

"Rather a heartless orphanage, no?" Dazai questioned.

 

"Dazai..." Kunikida grumbled. "Let's get back to work. We aren't do-gooders passing out alms to every street urchin we see."

 

"What kind of work do you do...?" Atsushi asked.

 

"Oh, that?" Dazai chuckled out. "We are detectives." Dazai said with a smirk.

 

"Tch." Kunikida clicks his tounge in irritation at the remark. "And when he says that, he doesn't mean we hunt down lost cats or wayward spouses." Kunikida further explains. "Our domain is in the realm of more... dangerous work." He says, showing off the gun at his side. "Have you heard of the 'Armed detective agency' home to those with unusual abilities?"

 

Atsushi eyes widened in surprise. He'd certainly heard the name. A detective company specializing in hazardous work that's too dicey for military police to handle. A growing standing on the twilight, ruling over the threshold between the worlds of day and night. Atsushi had heard that most of its members possessed some type of special, supernatural 'skill'.

 

Dazai relaxed back and seemed to notice something as he leaned back. "That lintel looks rather sturdy. I wager it could even support a person's weight." Dazai said jokingly.

 

"Stop gauging opportunities to prepare a noose at every tea house we visit!" Kunikida yelled in frustration.

 

"Pshaw! Have you no concept of the merit of the neck stretch?" Dazai said dramatically.

 

"What? Is that good for your health?" Kunikida asked, completely falling for the charade. Atsushi could only wonder if this was real, as Dazai explained this supposed neck stretch.

 

"W- well, then..." Atsushi stuttered out as he watched the two of them. "What kind of case are you working on?" Atsushi questioned out of curiosity.

 

Kunikida hmphed before speaking. "We are seeking a tiger." He said simply.

 

"... a tiger?" Atsushi asked with fear gripping his voice.

 

"Yes, a man eating beast that has terrorized the city as of late. It has ravaged storehouses, chewed up acres of farmland... the creature is running rampant." Dazai explained. "Apparently, it has recently been sighted in this district..." Dazai adds on.

 

Atsushi fell backward off his chair suddenly, a look of fear on his face. "I... I- I- I'd best be on my, now." Atsushi stuttered out, trying to back away towards the door.

 

"Hold it." Kunikida said, holding Atsushi up by the back of his shirt.

 

"I- I can't stay here! Nobody can defeat that monster!" Atsushi yelled out in fear.

 

"You..." Kunikida muttered, a look of realization crossing his face. "... know about this man eater?" Kunikida asked in a serious tone.

 

"It's been after me! It almost killed me!" Atsushi flailed, wanting to escape but wasn't succeeding in the slightest. "If it's nearby, I need to run, or -" Atsushi continued before being dropped, stopping him in his tracks.

 

Kunikida then grabbed Atsushi's right arm before kicking at one of the boy's legs. Atsushi immediately fell face first on the ground with Kunikida holding his arms behind his back. Atsushi had now found himself in a tackle he couldn't get out of.

 

"I told you-" Kunikida said. "The Armed Detective Agency deals with risky cases like this." Kunikida's grip on Atsushi's arm tightened. "You may pay for your meal with your arm - or by telling us all you know." Kunikida threatened, causing Atsushi to fearful noise.

 

"Oh, come, now, Kunikida-kun..." Dazai said with a lightly reprimanding tone. "The boss himself warned you that the gathering of intelligence needn't be an interrogation." Dazai reminded the strict man, causing to huff but ultimately let go.

 

Once Kunikida got up, he yelled at some of the people staring at the scene to move along as Dazai kneeled next to Atsushi. "So, what'll it be?" Dazai asked the boy.

 

Atsushi stayed silent a moment before responding. "That tiger wrecked my orphanage." Atsushi relented. "It destroyed our fields, tore our storehouse to shreds..." Atsushi could still clearly recall all the holes left in the grand. The amount of damage that covered every inch of the ground.

 

"No one died, thankfully, but the orphanage was too cash strapped to recover. So they tossed me out to save money." Atsushi continued, awful memories plaguing his mind.

 

'This is all your fault, you accursed freeloader!' They'd yell and point the blame to him.

 

'Why? I didn't do anything...' He used to question.

 

'We have no place for freedom here.' They'd mutter with disdain.

 

'There is no place under the sun where you might dwell!' They'd point and yell. All frustration being vented him and him solely.

 

'You are nothing but a strain on the world! Begone and vanish from this earth forever!' They'd curse at him.

 

Just the memories alone were enough to make Atsushi grow quiet. At some point, he'd been given tea. Looking at the steam rise out, the cup was a comforting distraction. 

 

"... It sounds like quite the disaster." Dazai finally spoke up.

 

"So my boy..." Kunikida began. "This beast 'almost killed' you, then?" He asked with a sharp glare.

 

"That man-eater wasn't satisfied with the radishes in our fields!" Atsushi exclaimed, pounding a fist to the table in frustration. "It followed me all the way here!" He explained with a shake to his voice.

 

After Atsushi had left the orphanage, he'd been wandering along the tsurumi river when he saw a reflective glint. It caught his eye, but when he walked over, he saw behind him as the tiger. Fear gripped his heart before he bolted.

 

"That animal chased me to this very city!" Atsushi yelled out. "My mind was clouded with hunger. I have no idea how I escaped..." Atsushi explained after calming down a bit.

 

"And when was this?" Dazai inquired.

 

"I was evicted two weeks ago. I saw it by the river... four days ago." Atsushi recalled.

 

"Yes, the attacks began roughly two weeks ago." Kunikida says, looking at his notes. "And we have eyewitness accounts of the beast by the tsurumi river four days ago too." Kunikida confirmed.

 

Dazai appeared to be thinking for a moment before he piped up. "Are you free right now, Atsushi-kun?" Dazai asked sweetly.

 

Atsushi felt a shiver run down his spine. "I have an incredibly bad feeling about this..." He said, his voice shaking from unease.

 

"If the tiger is pursuing you, it's perfect!" Dazai explained. "Would you like to aid our tiger hunt?" Dazai asked with a cheerful smile on his face.

 

"N- no! No, thank you!" Atsushi immediately stood up out of his chair. "You want to use me as tiger bait!? Who would ever willingly?" Atsushi started before being cut off.

 

"We offer payment." Dazai said simply. It caused Atsushi to stop dead in his tracks once he heard the word payment. "Kunikida-kun, deliver this to the boss back at the office." Dazai said, holding up a piece of paper.

 

"Hey. Are you going to hunt it down now? We need to verify this intel first..." Kunikida questioned his eccentric coworker.

 

"It's fine, it's fine." Dazai assured, handing over the paper. Kunikida gave a skeptical look but relented anyway.

 

"And, um, how much payment may I expect?" Atsushi asked nervously.

 

"About this much." Dazai said, holding up a different piece of paper. The large number shocked Atsushi, and suddenly, Atsushi was incredibly on board with the plan.

 

Part I is to be continued in Chapter 2: Weretiger's Curse!

Notes:

Not much canon divergence yet I know. However this was definitely more of an introduction to my writing style! I just couldn't think of anything that would change either. Because everything is the same except for who Atsushi is biologically related too.

Anyway this was the entire first half of the first chapter of the manga. I will say I'm going to be using the manga more than the anime simply because it's easier to me.

Do not fret though! Over time I will diverge from the plot more snd more. Be prepared! Anyways I'm going to use these end notes as a rant space from now on. So you better be prepared! just skip it I don't mind)!

Anyway see you in two weeks!