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There was a strange sense of comfort in Dr. Romani’s office, it was one of the few places left in Chaldea where things felt “calm”, it was nothing more than a Doctor’s office, somewhere clean and generally silent where he could talk with his patients which was oddly comforting for her. Even so, she still couldn’t help but feel burdened by her reason to go there.
As she watched the ceiling fan continue spinning in the white room, she wished she had gone insane… At least that could explain everything she had witnessed in so little; it could help ease the fear building within her ever since she heard that dreadful explosion. But as she heard the pages moving, she was reminded of her true situation.
“Overall, I would say that your report has everything of note from the Singularity Amelia.”
“Thanks Doctor, it’s been a while since I have made a report haha… But I am glad I didn’t miss anything.”
Humanity’s Last Master spoke calmly, trying to muster that friendly tone she greeted everyone with, something that Chaldea’s current director could tell, yet was respectful enough to not point out… At least, not yet.
Given their previous sessions, Amelia was more than aware of how Dr. Romani already has a pretty solid idea of what her current state is, and while it does show how good of a doctor, he is… It made it quite hard for her to be able to not pour out all of her worries and turmoil whenever she spoke with him.
“Well then, unto the next point I wanted to check with you.”
“Of course, Doctor.”
Due to Dr. Romani and Da Vinci’s own recommendation, it was decided that Chaldea’s Last Master, aka Amelia Cruz, would partake in psychological evaluations after every next mission by virtue of her state as a “Civilian” before joining Chaldea. Not that Amelia minded that as even before their… Current situation, she already was used to going to Dr. Romani’s office for advice and what not, if anything it would have been weirder if she hadn’t agreed to that.
Although, while she was already used to talking with the Doctor about her worries, she still felt on edge as this was their first evaluation. Just a few days ago Amelia and her Servants had returned from the first official Singularity of Orleans, the first official mission she had fulfilled since she was officially appointed as Chaldea’s last remaining Master… Something that she should be proud of yet made her feel full of doubt and worries.
As Dr. Romani sat on his chair, he began flipping over the pages of her report, stopping here and there to make sure he was reading certain parts correctly. He merely switched pages until he reached a part of the report he seemed to want to focus on, quickly shifting his eyes towards the girl sitting in front of her.
“I already made sure to read your report last night Amelia, and I got to say that I am glad that your first mission was a success.”
“I… Was a bit worried when I got rayshifted there… But I am glad that with everyone's support I could get through it.”
Amelia couldn’t help but smile slightly as she remembered everyone’s excitement when she returned from Orleans. While everyone had celebrated her safe return from Singularity F, seeing them actively cheer for her after conquering the first of the Seven Singularities made her feel… Happy, even proud of herself.
She couldn’t lie to herself and act as if it was a breeze, God knows her heart was mere moments away from stopping from everything she experienced there which did make her victory sweeter… Though not less stressful.
“N-Not to sound like a downer but everyone was… Worried, not because we doubted you but because the idea of conquering all Singularities with just one Master seemed farfetched, but thankfully you proved us all wrong.”
Part of her felt like she needed to be offended by everything Dr. Romani was implying, but really, she couldn’t blame him for such beliefs. After all, she didn’t know even the most basic thing about Magecraft and now she was thrusted into being Humanity’s last hope… Besides, as she began looking at his gentle smile, she couldn’t help but trust the good doctor with his assessment.
“Y-yeah, admittedly I didn’t even believe I could do that… S-Specially when I encountered those Wyverns, but thanks to some dumb luck everything turned out alright!”
“Mhmm, not to mention that you were even capable of summoning more Servants to help us out.”
Amelia immediately remembered the seemingly miraculous summon of Rider Astolfo and Saber Suzuka Gozen. While Da Vinci recommended Amelia to try to Summon more Servants with the help of Mash. At first, she worried that no one would answer her call, so seeing those two pop out to help was a massive relief. The fact that those two quickly became friendly with her was an added bonus really.
“I am… So glad I got to summon them, it may not seem that way but I really doubt I would have been able to win without their help.”
While she did have to thank Queen Marie Antoinette, Amadeus Mozart, and Jeanne D’Arc for their help despite being “Rogue Servants” summoned by the land itself, she did feel extremely grateful for the moral support Suzuka and Astolfo gave her during the Singularity, and the fact that both also seemed to stay at her side afterwards certainly made her feel much more at ease after… Everything that had happened there.
“Honestly having more Servants in Chaldea is a huge relief. Not that I don’t believe in Mash's capabilities as a Servant but… It’s always great having more help, especially by the fact that working with Artoria is still very difficult.”
… The moment Amelia heard her name, a chill began running down her back, her heart beginning to beat faster as she began remembering the reason why she was… Scared of this particular checkup. She knew that she shouldn’t feel like that, if anything she knew that her being so affected by something like “that” would make everyone doubt her capabilities to save them all… But she couldn’t stop herself from being weighed down by it, something that the Good Doctor noticed.
The air in the room became tense in an instant, as if a forbidden topic had been brought up. They both knew why Amelia’s victory over Orleans had been so bitter, why it had brought her more turmoil than joy… A realization brought by that same Tyrant who once was their enemy yet now was their cruelest ally.
“If I am not mistaken, Artoria and you had a… Difficult time working together in Orleans, right?”
“… Yes, we… Really couldn’t agree with anything.”
After the events of Singularity F, the Altered version of the King of Knights, Artoria Pendragon, had seemingly accepted Amelia's summon to become one of her first Servants. While yes, she had been Chaldea’s enemy just a few moments prior, given Chaldea’s current lack of resources to be able to confront the Singularities, it was generally agreed that Artoria Alter’s aid would be accepted as long as she controlled herself.
In truth, she did follow such a command by merely acting as Amelia’s Servant, not doing much of anything whenever they weren’t in active combat… Yet the problem came from her actions during combat.
Amelia couldn’t help but look away from the doctor as she was reminded of that brief yet impactful moment in Orleans, such memories being entwined by what she had been told about that very same King of Knights, the epitome of chivalry and class as a knight… Now reduced into nothing more than a soulless tyrant.
—
She was nothing more than a simple girl, one who had never truly experienced true combat, not that she was completely oblivious to the horrible sides of the world, rather that she had never experienced such things firsthand.
Unlike the many Mages found within Chaldea, the girl known as Amelia Cruz was completely new to such a world, not only was she made to learn that magic was real, but now was thrusted into a position even the most experienced of Mages would be surprised with… She was a civilian thrown into the Apocalypse, with support from people with more experience, yet still knowing that all of their hope was placed on her.
“Haa… Haa…”
She had learned about the 100 Year War in the past, mainly from stories she had read or biographies of the different figures found within, she had learned a lot from it from an outsider’s perspective… But that didn’t prepare her in the slightest to it’s bitter reality. It’s conflict wasn’t fought with Guns and explosions, yet the sound of steel clash and the screams of men ringed deep within her mind. The last Master merely stood frozen in place as she tried to process everything that was happening.
She knew that the future Singularities would be different from Fuyuki, she knew very well that she wouldn’t be sent to worlds that were already devoid of life like that hell on earth… But that didn’t lessen the impact of her situation, nothing could fully prepare her for that.
“Incapacitate anyone who attacks you” was the only command she could give to her Servants, a mindless one she said merely to do something, she knew that the soldiers who were attacking them were trying to kill them all… But she still couldn’t-
“M-MS. AMELIA-”
Amidst the chaos in her mind, the voice of the Shield maiden cut through everything else, for a second making her be aware that she wasn’t a spectator to all that madness… Just enough for her to see the blade descending towards her.
The girl didn’t have enough time to react, as fast as she was able to see her attacker was as fast as she could jump back to avoid it. Even as she jumped backwards, she still found herself being slashed on her arm by the enemy soldier.
It was thanks to her panic that she couldn’t feel the pulsating pain emanating from her arm, yet she could feel the warm liquid falling from it as her gaze slowly focused on her hand. Even if it was still attached to her body, she could see herself shiver in complete terror… Especially as she looked up at the soldier quickly lifting his blade to finish her off.
No words or thoughts coursed through her mind as everything seemed to slow down around her, the screams of battle, even the worried shouts from those who depend on her got drowned by the reality of her situation… She was going to die. In an instant all of Humanity’s hopes would vanish because a weak girl like herself got killed by a soldier whose name she would never learn… All for nothing. By pure instinct she immediately closed her eyes and let out the last possible scream of her life, waiting for her life to end… Yet nothing happened.
Her eyes remained closed for what felt like an eternity, until she felt a warm droplet fall onto her face, it took all the courage found within her being to finally open her eyes to the terrifying visage that was in front of her. The very same soldier who tried ending her life was completely immobile as a dark sword tore through his chest as if he was made out of paper, before Amelia could even say anything, his body was tossed aside violently by her would be “savior”.
“Stop daydreaming during combat if you don’t want to be killed, Master.”
Amelia could only see the visage of a dark knight standing in front of her, with an armor that seemed to snuff out all the light around… Someone who even while wearing a mask to hide her eyes still looked down on her with those eyes that seemed devoid of any semblance of life.
—
Artoria did save her, that was an undeniable fact. Had it not been for her rushing to kill the Soldier that threatened her life… Amelia wouldn’t be there to begin with… But for some reason her heart ached because of it, not because she craved death… But because she wasn’t ready to see it firsthand.
She couldn’t help but grab hold of her skirt as she was reminded again and again about such an incident. Even if she hadn’t said it outside of the confines of the Singularity, what had happened still…Stuck with her vividly, it kept eating her as the days passed despite how idiotic she felt being affected by something like that.
“Truth be told, as powerful as Artoria may be, she isn’t a Servant that’s… Approachable, if that’s the correct word to use.”
“… She is… I-I know that she is an “Alter” or whatever that classification is but… A-At times I just don’t… Know how I will be able to continue working with her.”
Since she was a little kid, Amelia had loved the stories of King Arthur and her Knights, as weird as that may be for a girl like her, she had always loved reading about chivalrous knights, ranging from the truly virtuous like Sir Percival, to absolutely chaotic individuals like Sir Lamorak, she had always adored them, heck you would expect her to be completely head over heels after meeting THE true King Arthur… Yet all she felt whenever she saw Artoria was “fear”.
From what she was told, the Artoria she had faced in Fuyuki who then was summoned by her was an Alter of her regular self, another aspect of her own existence shaped by the perception of the world and a different side to their very existence, she wasn’t truly the real Artoria Pendragon… At least not her entirely.
“Still, I know it’s hard for you to have to deal with someone like her. That’s why having the support of people like Astolfo and Suzuka will be of great use for you.”
By all means Amelia wasn’t “alone” in her mission, after all she had the support of Mash, The Knight, Astolfo, and Suzuka… Heck, she was even told by Da Vinci herself that they were already preparing Chaldea’s systems to let her try to summon more Servants to aid her in their mission… But that wasn’t what truly worried her.
She wasn’t alone, she had the support of her Servants and from everyone in Chaldea, everyone trusted her with all their hopes to succeed in that seemingly impossible mission… What she feared was…
“… Do you think I can truly… Succeed Doctor?”
“Hmm? Well, judging by your performance in Singularity F and Orleans, it’s safe to say that you seem more than capa-”
“I am just a Civilian Doctor, I am not a mage or someone who knows true combat… She said it herself; I don’t have it within me to… Do what we need to win.”
Her words were bitter and painful, as she spoke, she sounded as if she was one moment away from breaking down in tears as she kept on grabbing onto her skirt. For a moment, Romani merely watched her in silence as her expression simply soured.
—
The skirmish they were part of wasn’t that big all things considered, while it was enough to cause a noticeable combat with the French forces, it was far from the complete might of the French and English armies present, in theory such battle would have ended in a few hours had it not been for… Their interference.
“Ghhh!”
“A-Ah, I-I am sorry Ms. Amelia! I-I didn’t mean to-”
“It’s…Ok Mash.”
Besides that incident, Amelia hadn’t found herself having another near-death experience like that, all that was left was tending to the wound in her arm. While Mash knew some semblance of healing Magecraft and had been taught by Romani how to apply first aid, it was still quite clear that she was still on edge after all of that… Not that Amelia could blame her as she also felt that way as well.
The soldiers they had helped even if by accident were all cheering after their victory, some were praying in mass while others couldn’t help but burst into song and laughter… She wanted to join them in that celebration, she knew that it would help her, but her heart kept on pounding as those mental images continued assaulting her mind over and over again.
She began looking around those left from the battle, looking for her until her gaze settled on a single knight clad in dark armor… stained completely by the blood of all of those she had slaughtered who stood alone by a nearby lake. Amelia wanted to stop staring at her as a savior, someone she had to thank for her life… Yet all she got from staring at her was the fragmented visage of her slaughter
She just… Couldn’t stand it.
Even as her arm just ached, Amelia immediately got up from the ground to head towards Artoria’s direction, even as Mash tried to call out for her, Chaldea’s Last Master was just focused on the same Tyrant who saved her life after spilling so much blood.
The Tyrant didn’t do much aside from trying to clean her blade in a nearby river, had she not been covered by the very same armor that was stained by her enemies’ blood her visage would have been rather peaceful… Though said peace immediately came to an end once she heard her Master’s footsteps, prompting her to look in her direction.
She merely looked at Amelia’s conflicted expression for a few seconds before returning to what she was doing, causing Amelia’s blood to boil as a result.
“I see that you have recovered, Master.”
Her words were cold and distant, rather than seeming to care for her well being merely stating a fact… A cold behavior that seemed to want to drive her away.
The Last Master couldn’t help but clench her fist in rage by the way her supposed Servant acted, even if she was the reason why she was still breathing she just couldn’t comprehend why she was like that… It sickened her to her core.
“… Why did you kill those Soldiers, Alter?”
Her voice was painful and sore, as if it was mere seconds away from crying in disgust by what she had to utter. In her entire life she never imagined, never wished she had to say something like that… Yet, here she was saying that.
“Because they were going to kill you, and I was summoned to be your Servant, as simple as that.”
Whenever she read about King Arthur, she always imagined him, or rather her being distant yet caring, a true king in all ways possible… But as she talked with another aspect of that king of legend, all she could see was a machine made for slaughter and nothing else…
“You didn’t have to kill them for that Alter, you could have just-”
“I could have done what? Incapacitate them? You saw how effective that was when Kyrielight and that Knight tried to do so. It’s childish to think that.”
Her words disgusted her, they filled her with an unpleasant feeling she wanted to deny yet… Couldn’t, she simply couldn’t wrap her head around such a mindset even though she was seeing someone who truly embodies what it meant.
“They were still people Alter…”
“Yes, they were… But they shouldn’t mean anything in the face of your mission.”
In an instant, the Altered version of the King of Knights turned around to look at her Master, even if her vision was hidden with her visor, Amelia could still feel her piercing gaze tear through her entire being.
“You are Humanity’s Last Master, the entire fate of mankind rests on your shoulders. I was summoned to aid you in fulfilling that purpose, so if you really want to save the planet you have to be prepared to defeat any and all enemies the Singularities throw at you.”
Her words were direct yet merciless, they showed no shred of care towards her fragile heart as they spoke the most objective truth in the cruelest way possible. Amelia couldn’t help but feel a shiver run down her spine as she continued hearing her talk.
“It doesn’t matter whether your enemy may be a reanimated skeleton, the spawn of a dragon, or even your fellow man Amelia Cruz, right now your duty is to save Humanity by any means necessary.”
She hated it, she hated that weight that had no place on her… She hated the notion that a “normal” girl like her was now tasked with being Humanity’s beacon of hope at the cost of so many others… To know that she was the only one capable of doing so even if she was scared to do so… She wanted to cry, but she knew her tears wouldn’t be heard by anyone.
No matter how hard she tried looking at her supposed “Knight”, Amelia couldn’t help but hate her, hate everything she represented, hate how she couldn’t deny what she was telling her, hate her weakness to be unable to accept the role she had to fulfill…
“… I-I… I wish I hadn’t summoned you Alter…”
For a split second, she could hear the rustle of steel as it seemed like Artoria moved her arm for a moment.
“… Regardless of your feelings towards me, I won’t apologize for what I did for your sake Master, it was needed for your mission.”
With that simple comment, something seemed to snap on Amelia’s mind as all that sorrow and disgust quickly turned into boiling rage as she stared down at her Servant as tears fell from her own eyes.
“Wh… W-…WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?!”
“Nothing. I am merely fulfilling the reason why you summoned me, the reason why you should be fighting.”
Her words were cold as ice, lacking any sense of morality or empathy. If she didn’t know better, she would have assumed that the woman clad in black armor was nothing more than a heartless machine hellbent on her mission.
Amelia couldn’t see a living legend from Humanity, only a cruel monster that masqueraded as a human
—
The two remained in an awkward silence for less than a minute, but every subsequent second felt longer than the last one… It was like being between a sword and a hard place. By all means Dr. Romani was well aware that Amelia was both their only hope to combat the Incineration of humanity… But he also knew that from his perspective, she was just a kid, a girl who just a few months prior was merely trying to enjoy her in that awkward transition into adulthood… It was unfair that she had to carry such a burden, he was more than aware of it.
Even if hadn’t made any comment when he heard via the intercom what Artoria had told Amelia, it was still hard for him to know what to say, by all means Artoria made sense, their situation was so dire that to an extent they really couldn’t allow themselves to wonder about morality and what not… But was that truly, right? Perhaps at some point he was the one who was made to answer such questions, but right now he wasn’t sure.
What he knew was that… Amelia wanted to give up, yet knew that that wasn’t an option available for her, it was the cruel reality of their situation, a painful and bitter one.
“Truth be told we are all… Scared, Amelia.”
“…”
“Our current situation isn’t like anything anyone could have imagined, even from the Servant’s perspective the reason why we summoned them is almost fantastical to them.”
Amelia couldn’t help but chuckle slightly as she remembered how confused both Suzuka and Astolfo got when she told them why they were summoned, it was… Humanizing to say the least, at least they also lacked the answers needed regarding their shared goal.
At least she was glad to say that her memories with her Servants weren’t all painful… Some helped give her back that sense of normalcy she had lost so long ago.
“You know that… Doesn’t answer my question, right?”
“I know, but truth be told I also don’t know such an answer. I know most wouldn’t want to make you carry such a burden, but we have no other choice… I am sorry.”
“… It’s ok Doctor, thank you for your honesty.”
Romani couldn’t help but give Amelia a saddened smile, it really wasn’t fair to anyone involved, but there was nothing he could do for that girl but hope for the best for her.
“For the time being, try relaxing for a few more days. We are already preparing everything for the rayshift into the next singularity, so while you can try to rest.”
“Got it and… Thanks for at least understanding, Doctor.”
“That’s my job after all.”
Amelia gave the doctor a solemn smile as she quickly left her chair and began heading to the door, she truly did respect him, not only as a professional, but also as a friend. Even if he couldn’t help her at that moment, just knowing that he cared for her well-being was more than enough.
—
As Amelia left the Doctor’s office, she couldn’t help but do a small stretch after having been sitting for close to an Hour. She prepared herself to go to the Gym that was set up to help keep the staff in shape… Until she saw Artoria’s dreadful armor from the corner of her eye, walking towards the same direction as where she wanted to go.
She knew that despite her feelings towards Artoria, she still needed to work with her to surpass the singularities, she even said so herself… But the aching in her heart stopped her from trying to reach towards the altered Tyrant of the Round Table… Even if a part of herself wanted to reach out towards Artoria, she didn’t feel capable of doing so.
The Last Master of Chaldea merely walked back into her room, still burdened by the heartless words the King of Knight told her, those words she needed to hear yet wasn’t prepared to do so.