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Dick couldn’t sleep.
It wasn’t that he didn’t want to. Far from it.
He really had tried. In fact, he’d gone out of his way to try to fall asleep.
He’d returned from patrol, muscles sore and fatigue rapidly overtaking him as he slipped silently through the dark hallways of the manor. The soft sound of feet dragging across the carpet could be heard, his movements sluggish and far more unguarded and uncoordinated than they usually were.
It was irrational. To say that the manor was spacious was an understatement, and really any sound that he did make would be swallowed amongst its long hallways, tall walls, and lavish furnishings. He was at no risk of disturbing anyone, of garnering unwanted attention. Yet he stalked toward his room with a bated breath and footsteps as light as he could muster with the ache in his legs, hesitant to disrupt the reluctant peace that existed amongst the manor’s stillness.
He let habit overtake him as the weariness weighed on his mind, eyes heavy and mind uncharacteristically blank.
So his body navigated the hallways with practiced ease, a sense of safety washing over him from the familiarity of the action. The kind of innate familiarity that snuck up on you after years of thoughtless coexistence, after hundreds of times wandering the halls. The kind of familiarity where Dick could anticipate every portrait on the wall, every dent in the molding.
Of course it was second nature now, but Dick could remember his first time making the journey. His hands trembling and unease settling into his stomach as he peered into the hallway, its grand demeanor overbearing as it cast its harsh shadows over him, apprehension visible in his eyes. To think that he now walked the same path so comfortably. That he was able to grow into his new life, to find comfort again, to have family again.
Dick looked up, coming to a stop in front of his bedroom door, the doorknob cold as he pushed the door open.
Somehow, the short steps to his bathroom were far more trying than the trek to his room had been.
He could hear the thumps and clatters of his robin suit against the floor in his rush to strip it off, tugging off his gloves, his utility belt, his cape, the mask. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, dark bags under his eyes and dried blood clinging to his skin, somehow it didn’t alarm him anymore. He focused on the sound of hot water spraying out the shower as he fought the temptation to collapse into his bed and sleep through the weekend.
If he was honest it would be far from the first time ignoring his common sense and giving in. But he knew it was a bad idea, that it was unsanitary and that it would be more of a pain to wake up still in his robin gear, facing disapproving looks from Alfred over the breakfast table.
Perhaps that had been his mistake. It was ironic, maybe if he’d disregarded his stupid sense of self preservation he would have actually been able to sleep, mind drifting the second it hit the pillow.
But he hadn’t. Instead of getting to rest and repair itself his body had decided that it preferred to make eye contact with the ceiling, sheets periodically ruffling beneath him as he shifted positions.
He couldn’t even blame overthinking, mind painfully blank and body numb.
It should be illegal to be so pointlessly restless. Not that it would matter. For all he knew it might have been illegal, Gotham didn’t exactly have a reputation for abiding by the law.
So really, under the circumstances, who could blame him for deciding that sleep was stupid anyway?
He’d given up on sleep, a resigned expression overtaking his features as he crept out of bed in search of something to pass the time.
That had brought him to where he was now. Hunched over himself in his desk chair, a blanket wrapped lazily around him and the soft glow of his laptop illuminating his face, a stark contrast to his dark room.
He wished he could say that he’d been productive. He wished he could say that he’d even tried. But he couldn’t really focus or put his thoughts together coherently enough to be of any use so really it wasn’t his fault.
So he scrolled mindlessly and unrushed, occasionally glancing toward his phone. It felt like it was taunting him, ungodly hour displayed proudly on his lock screen to remind him of just how long he’d been up.
He abandoned his laptop, relaxing limply into his chair and yielding to his phone’s cries for attention as he entered his password. His fingers moved on their own accord, falling into habit as he swiped and tapped against the screen, mind foggy.
Somewhere amongst the haze he found himself staring at his last conversation with Wally, because of course he was. What else would he be doing?
As he read the most recent message his lips quirked up, Wally telling him to stay safe on patrol. He’d missed it before having left the cave but it didn’t fail to spread that familiar warmth throughout his chest, knowing that Wally was thinking of him, knowing that he cared.
He instantly moved to text him back, to respond, his thumbs typing out words before deleting them and trying again. What did he even want to say? He was pretty sure ‘give me attention’ wasn’t socially acceptable but he wasn’t sure that he had it in his sleep deprived brain to care.
‘U up?’
Ah yes, much better. Nice going Dick, that inner frat boy is a great look on you.
Under different circumstances he probably would’ve hesitated, it was late and with any luck Wally was at least getting some rest. Not that he would mind, Wally was pretty happy to talk to Dick whenever the opportunity arose. He still wouldn’t have wanted to disturb him.
But the circumstances weren’t different, and he’d texted Wally, and now he was stuck with an agitating sense of dissatisfaction as he stared at the unmoving screen.
And it was now that he could argue he was really doomed, because how was he just meant to go to sleep when all he really wanted was to see Wally, to breathe him in, to cling to him and never let go?
That was the unfortunate moment when his brain decided to partially start working again and a particularly bad idea hit him. Bad enough for his exhausted and careless self to pause in an unfortunately uncharacteristic moment of self-awareness. Bad enough for his stupid desperate self to consider it.
It was a Friday night. Wally, preferring to sleep in than make the journey to the mountain on a Saturday morning, spent his Friday nights in his room at the mountain. And Dick, clearly being a genius, could just as easily go spend his Friday night at the mountain.
And he knew it was a bad idea, because if texting his best friend/situationship at 3 in the morning was already frowned upon in social etiquette then showing up uninvited at half past 3 to crawl into his skin was definitely a condemnable offense.
It was a bad idea because Bruce and Alfred would definitely notice his absence in the morning and he’d have to come up with some sort of excuse that they definitely wouldn’t buy. It was a bad idea because anyone could be at the mountain and he’d have to explain himself to them too. It was a bad idea because Wally was at the mountain and if he had to explain himself to everyone else who wasn’t even involved in said bad idea then he’d definitely have to explain himself to Wally when he barged into his room.
But really if he thought about it (or more accurately didn’t really think about it) surely it wasn’t that bad of an idea. He would just be going to spend some time with his best friend, nothing weird about that. And he was supposed to be heading to the mountain on Saturday anyway so he was just saving himself that trip. And the bar may be low but at least he wouldn’t be getting himself into any danger. And really he could argue that he didn’t have nearly enough bad ideas, after all he was a teenager and it was late at night and there was no better time to have bad ideas.
He knew any sense of rationality within him had lost against his impulse as soon as his heart jumped and the adrenaline had begun coursing through him.
He moved excitedly, clumsily standing up, his forgotten blanket dropping to the floor as reached for his sunglasses. He may have been impulsive but he wasn’t thoughtless.
And so he was making his way through the manor for the second time that night, ironically appearing far more awake as he raced through the halls, down the stairs, and around a corner toward the cave and the zeta tube.
His confidence in his stupid idea grew with every passing second as his goal appeared to be more and more tangible and his doubts became whispers in the back of his mind. Unfortunately, his impatience also seemed to grow, his earlier frustration happily shifting and manifesting itself in the form of his need to see Wally.
It all seemed to take root in his chest and stomach, the sudden rush of emotions so overwhelming that he couldn’t help but feel slightly nauseous as he felt his heart beating, arms tingling, and chest constricting.
B-01 ROBIN
“Shit..” Dick cursed under his breath, being thrust away from his thoughts and forced back to his surroundings. He hadn’t accounted for his arrival to be announced. He hadn’t really accounted for much, that had kind of been the point.
He took a second to take some deep breaths and center himself as his eyes adjusted to the dark. His emotions seemed to somewhat subside as he focused back on being alert, being left with a dim sense of excitement and nervousness.
Luckily, it didn’t appear that he had attracted any attention. The mountain was dark and silent and the kitchen and living room were empty, silently buzzing with the energy of having been previously inhabited. It should have probably been much eerier than it was, but he’d spent far too many late nights here and by now he’d memorized every shadow.
It made sense that everyone was asleep, after all, he was supposed to be asleep. But he couldn’t help but feel a bit paranoid as he made sure to walk quietly.
You couldn’t really fault him for it, especially with superpowered teammates, even if it seemed that Conner’s real superpower was minding his own business. Dick really didn’t understand how unbothered he seemed to be about the whole superhearing thing, maybe not bothered but inconvenienced? Dick was sure that if he had those abilities eavesdropping would be his new hobby, but for now he was happy to count his blessings.
He came to a stop in front of Wally’s door and his nerves flooded over him, his body feeling warm and fragile, suddenly being far too aware of every small fidget.
There were many things Dick hadn’t accounted for, but he’d have to add losing his confidence at the most vital moment to the list.
He was conflicted. Part of him was screaming to turn around and return to the manor, to the safety of his own room. His other half ached to knock on the door, feeling the exhilarating rush of adrenaline both knowing that what he was doing was probably wrong and that Wally was so close.
If he did the mental gymnastics it didn’t make any sense to turn back now. He’d already made it this far. And Wally was right there. And it would be even more difficult to explain to everyone why he had visited the mountain at 3am and left a few minutes later.
Surely there was nothing wrong with operating off of the sunken cost fallacy.
He didn’t give himself any more time to ‘think it through’, stopping his train of thought before he could even begin to consider his relationship with Wally and whether this was even an appropriate gesture.
Emboldened, he took a deep breath, straightened his posture, surged forward, and knocked.
At first all he was met with was deafening silence from the other side as his heart pounded in his ears. But before he could reconsider and flee the scene he heard a faint thump, followed by scurried footsteps.
Before he could even process the door creaking open he was met with bleary green eyes.
Wally stood in front of him, wearing his sweatpants and a loose black t-shirt. He leaned lazily against the doorframe, his messy ginger hair was proudly displayed and it was clear that he had been asleep.
He looked straight out of a dream, Dick would’ve felt bad for waking him if he wasn’t too busy remembering how to breathe.
“..Rob?” Wally’s expression seemed to cycle between surprise, confusion and concern as his eyes focused on Dick and his eyebrows furrowed.
Confusion? Dick could work with that.
Dick really couldn’t help it as his eyes wandered over Wally, as if his mind hadn’t really understood that Wally was here. His torso was long and slender and he had such nice arms that it was really a shame they weren’t on him
The tension grew thick as Dick found himself staring. Who could blame him? Wally was unfairly handsome for someone who had been asleep mere minutes ago.
Dick bit down on his lower lip, a nervous habit he hadn’t quite been able to shake, and chanced a glance at Wally’s face again. He felt the heat in his face as he found Wally eyeing his lips.
Their eyes met for a moment before Dick averted his gaze, the heat quickly spreading down his neck.
Despite his sudden meekness he took a step forward, slowly decreasing the proximity between them. Wally’s confusion clearly hadn’t subsided as his breath hitched, but Dick also wasn’t hearing any complaints and that was enough for him not to back out.
Dick was very quickly getting sick of his own bullshit and sick of the ever-nagging frustration and impatience lingering in him.
It was dark and tense and Wally was right there.
Dick didn’t know what possessed him as he leaned in, but from one moment to the next his hands had clutched onto Wally’s shirt as he eagerly claimed Wally’s lips.
Wally let out a surprised sound, taking a second to process the situation before he finally seemed to wake up, kissing back just as passionately.
One hand found its way into Dick's hair, tugging at it gently as he tilted Dick's head further to the side and deepened the kiss. His hands crept up Dick’s sides, snaking their way beneath the hem of his shirt and grabbing firmly onto his waist.
The sudden skin to skin contact sent a jolt of electricity down Dick’s spine as he let out a content sigh, finally feeling some satisfaction knowing that Wally was exactly where he was meant to be, with him.
He always overthought things too much with Wally, everything always came so natural with him whenever they were together, as if they were made to slot together.
A low chuckle escaped Wally as he pulled away, teeth tugging gently on Dick’s bottom lip and arms wrapping around his waist.
If a needy whine had escaped from Dick’s throat at the action then that was nobody’s business but Dick and Wally’s.
“Miss me?” Wally teased, smirking. He was clearly amused.
Dick wanted to wipe that smug expression off of his face, it was infuriating how seemed to light his nerves on fire.
“..Maybe” Dick responded, barely above a whisper as he tried and failed to keep his expression neutral and tone even despite being out of breath.
“Mm really?” Wally mused, pausing and lowering his voice, his eyebrows raised and the mirth was visible in his eyes, “Because you seem to have shown up at my door in the middle of the night and kissed me like you need it more than you need air.”
“Hmm.. I guess you’re right.” Dick replied exaggeratedly, suppressing a smile.
“Or maybe..” Dick paused, tone playful and teasing as he slipped out of Wally’s arms and turned away, walking toward the open door, “I should go and find someone else to spend my lonely nights with.”
Maybe that was his favorite part of their dynamic, the teasing, the banter, the chase. That game that you can only play when you both pretend that it’s casual, that you could still walk away if you wanted to.
Wally followed him, grabbing his forearm, halting his journey and pulling him back in. One arm wrapped around Dick’s waist tightly as if to physically hold him in place as the other reached to close the door.
“Don’t go, baby.” Wally pleaded, expression softer before his lips quirked upwards, amusement returning, “You’ve already come this far.”
That was hardly fair, Wally was cheating by pulling out the pet names. Regardless, Dick, ever the fool, melted.
Dick sighed dramatically, rolling his eyes, “You’re so lucky that I find that cocky attitude hot”
Despite his protests it was clear that he’d given in, reaching up and pulling Wally down into another kiss.
It was shorter this time, sweet and genuine before Dick pulled away and took a step back, moving around Wally and toward the bed.
He found the lamp and the room was filled with a warm golden glow.
“I’m lucky you find me hot.” Wally joked over his shoulder, lazy grin on his face as he walked back toward the door and locked it.
Dick snorted, “Are you sure?”
Wally snickered and turned around to find Dick sitting on the edge of the bed as he began wandering over.
When he reached him Wally leaned down, his hand coming up to cup Dick’s cheek, thumb gently caressing him as he leaned in, his lips ghosting over Dick’s. Dick’s lips parted, eyes closing, and face tilting up in preparation for a kiss.
“Pretty sure,” Wally whispered against his lips teasingly, pulling away as Dick unsuccessfully chased his lips.
“Asshole.” Dick muttered under his breath, chuckling dryly and lightly kicking Wally as he saw the amused grin on his face.
“Locking me in?” Dick asked jokingly as he glanced past Wally and noticed the locked door. “If you wanted me that badly you could’ve just said so.” he added, flirtatiously.
“Sure, you can be the one to explain to Batman what his son is doing in my bed.” Wally deadpanned, unimpressed.
“Oh, am I staying the night?” Dick teased, wrapping his arms around Wally’s neck and leaning back, pulling him down so that he hovered on top of him on the bed.
Wally stabilized himself on his forearms and knees, adjusting to the proximity. Something shifted in his expression, amusement being replaced by something more serious, his adoration visible in his eyes. One hand pushed at the hem of Dick’s shirt, sliding it up to reveal soft skin. His fingertips grazed gently over his stomach and stroked at his side as Dick shivered, goosebumps erupting over his skin. There was something so intimate about the faint touch, gentle and unrushed, suffocatingly sweet.
Dick loved how touchy Wally was, how his hands betrayed him always gravitating toward Dick, roaming the plains of his body. He loved having Wally’s attention on him, claiming him as if he were his.
Dick brushed his hands beneath Wally’s shirt and up his back, grabbing onto him like an anchor, as if the action would ground him. They were so close, Dick could feel the heat radiate off of Wally’s body, could feel his breath fan against him, but he needed to be closer.
And it was so intimate, faces red and hearts beating quickly as their breaths filled the room's silence. And Dick really needed Wally to stop looking at him like he was all he could ever want.
Dick knew it was a bad idea. He’d known since the first time he’d felt the tension between them, the first time Wally’s hands had lingered, the first time they’d kissed. They were best friends and it was a bad idea.
But it felt so right and when he was beneath Wally he was pretty sure that he didn’t care. And even if he knew that he should push Wally away he just wanted him closer.
So he pulled him closer and pushed up for a kiss.
It was short but passionate as he yearned for the sense of connection, clinging onto Wally as he pushed more of his weight onto Dick.
Wally pulled away, taking a second to gaze down at Dick’s glassy eyes and kiss-swollen lips before pressing a soft kiss to his neck.
“You may be nocturnal boy wonder but I’m still mortal and I need to sleep. As I recall I was pretty rudely awakened.” His tone was light and joking but it lacked energy and it was clear that his tiredness had caught up to him.
“You seemed to quite like my unwelcome intrusion.” Dick quipped, though his low energy matched Wally’s, and the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Wally didn’t respond but his smile was genuine as he pushed himself off of Dick and helped pull him up.
The two made their way to the head of the bed, crawling under the inviting covers and turning the lights off, plunging them in darkness.
Wally reached for Dick, pulling him close and stroking his back soothingly.
“You look tired, baby.” Wally commented softly, concern finding its way into his voice.
Dick sighed and nuzzled close to his chest, tucking his head under Wally’s chin and wrapping his arms around him. It was nice, warm and safe.
“You can’t even see me.” Dick stated matter-of-factly.
“You know what I mean, Rob.” Wally sighed.
“Couldn’t sleep.” Dick responded after a beat of silence.
Maybe he was just too tired but Wally seemed to accept that answer. He didn't pry any further but he held Dick tighter and placed a kiss to the top of his head, as if he could single-handedly lift the weight off of Dick's shoulders.
Dick’s exhausted began to creep back in and he let it, his body feeling heavy.
Unfortunately, his mind didn’t seem to agree, beginning to wander. He fell into the familiar pattern of overanalyzing his relationship with Wally, every interaction, their implications. Maybe his bad idea had been exactly that, a bad idea. He didn’t know how to feel about any of it. He didn’t know how Wally felt about any of it.
They were best friends. They weren’t in a relationship. And as much fun as it was it was confusing and it stung.
He didn’t know what to think. Every interaction seemed to cross the line. He wasn’t even sure what the line was anymore.
The line of acceptable platonic behavior? That had been passed a long time ago.
The line of acceptable more than friends but not dating behavior? If he tried to map that out he was pretty sure he’d die trying.
It was so blurry. Maybe there was no line.
“You think too loudly.” Wally whispered, half asleep.
It startled Dick, taking him out of his thoughts and back to the present, cuddled up with Wally who didn’t seem nearly as bothered about the whole situation.
Maybe that was the right approach, one step at a time. Maybe it didn’t make any sense overthinking it because it just didn’t make any sense and that was ok. Maybe he was just allowed to enjoy being as close to Wally as he would allow and it didn't have to be any more complicated than that.
“Be mine for tonight?” Dick finally responded after some time, voice soft and vulnerable.
“I was yours the moment we met.”