Actions

Work Header

Awkward Dad Toue

Summary:

A parody AU, in which Aoba and Sei are high school students and Toue is their overbearing, awkward father. Features art by Apricot.

Notes:

This started off as a bit of a fun joke on tumblr. I decided I wanted to write for it.

Let those facts set the mood of the entire fic.

As I mentioned in the summary, this fic will feature art by Apricot. The art is entirely hers, and I make no claim to it. The ideas for the art and fics are a bit of a mix of ideas between the both of us. Check out her art, everyone; it's brilliant!

Chapter 1: The Party

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"Hello, Aoba-san."

"Yo, Aoba."

Aoba jumped, shut his locker and turned around with a strained grin. "You guys need to stop sneaking up on me."

Virus's lips curved into a small smile. "I apologize, but we wanted to find you before you left school."

"Here," Trip said, holding out a envelope sealed with what looked suspiciously like a heart-shaped sticker. Aoba held his gaze for a second, but took the envelope quickly after Trip responded to his questioning look with a nod.

"Hmm, a party?" Aoba said, eyes scanning the note he'd withdrawn from the envelope. "Tomorrow?"

"We know it's short notice," Virus said, the exaggerated sigh that escaped his lips making it seem as if they regretted inconveniencing Aoba at all, "but we've already given Sei-san his invitation, and we would love it if you could both come along."

"I don't think we're doing anything..." Aoba replied, pocketing the invitation as he reached for his backpack. "I'll call you later and let you know."

"Excellent," Virus said, expression smoothing back over to his usual cool smile at Aoba's reply. "We'll be waiting. Oh, and Aoba-san?"

"Yeah?"

"Feel free to bring along a plus one."

Aoba frowned. "It didn't say anything about that on the invitation."

Virus nodded. "It's fine."

"Because it's you, Aoba," Trip said, and he raised his arm in farewell as he retreated down the corridor with Virus. Aoba frowned and started after them for a moment, but before he could tear himself from his thoughts, he felt a sharp tug on his arm.

"Aoba!" Sei said, cutting off Aoba's shout of surprise. "Father sent me to find you... he's been waiting at the gate for us for half an hour now..."

"... the bell only rang five minutes ago."

"I know," Sei said, looking as if it was causing him physical pain not to cringe. "Come on... let's go home."

"Yeah," Aoba said, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. "Sei, I was talking to Virus and Trip..."

Sei nodded stiffly. "How are we going to go without Father noticing?"

"Don't worry," Aoba said. "I have a plan."


"And where are you two boys going tonight?"

Aoba and Sei stopped dead in their tracks. Their father was sitting at the dining room table, staring out into the hallway which led to the front door. Seemed like Operation Wait Until Dad Is In His Study wasn't the great success that Aoba had hoped it would be. But then, his dad had already been suspicious; he'd walked in while Aoba had risked trying to phone him up to invite him as his date, and after that round of interrogation, Aoba hadn't had the guts to try and call him again. Damn it, why did this always happen?

"It's just a party, Dad," Aoba said, trying hard not to groan.

"A party?" Toue asked. "In that?, Aoba?"

"We'll look after each other, Father..." Sei said, making a vain attempt to smooth the situation over.

"Yeah, in this," Aoba said. "It's cool, okay?"

"It's black leather!" Toue snapped. "And everyone can see your chest!"

"So what?!"

"Oh dear," Sei murmured, trying to edge into the hallway.

"That it. Aoba, I try to give you freedom..." Aoba coughed loudly, and Toue ignored him, "but this time, I have to put my foot down."

Aoba's expression cycled through about twenty different emotions at his father's words, but eventually settled on something akin to resigned disdain.

"You mean... we can't go?" Sei asked, looking thoroughly downtrodden.

"... you may go," Toue said, and Aoba and Sei gave each other disbelieving smiles. "But I am going to drop you there myself. And Aoba?"

"Eh?" Aoba said, giving his father a confused look.

"You are going to change into something different. You are not going out in that."


"My, my, Aoba-san," Virus sighed, shaking his head as Aoba snatched the drink he'd just offered him out of his hand waspishly. "This isn't what I meant by 'plus one'..."

Aoba groaned, tugged roughly at the high collar of the turtleneck sweater he was now wearing under his coat, and buried his face in his hands. He wasn't sure, but it looked like his dad was about to strike up a conversation with Trip at the drinks table.

"Shut up."

Notes:

Toue worries about the state of Aoba's purity when Aoba wears his Chiral Night getup to parties.

Chapter 2: The School Gate

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"Urgh, what a day," Aoba groaned, stretching his arms over his head to uncramp the muscles in his shoulders. "First the math test, then the English quiz..."

"I think I did well on both of them..." Sei said, spinning one of the braces on his arm around his thin wrist mindlessly. He always fidgeted when he was nervous, and Aoba grinned and reached over to give him a pat on the back.

"You're the smart one. It's my grades Dad is always going on about..."

"... I guess..." Sei muttered, cheeks burning pink. "Ah, Aoba?"

"Hmm?"

"... did you eat lunch with Koujaku-san today?"

"Yeah," Aoba said blankly, "why?"

"There's braids... in your hair..."

"Eh?! Ah, damn it, I thought I untangled them all!" Aoba groaned, and Sei stifled a soft laugh on the back of his hand. Aoba pulled his hair over his shoulder and ran his fingers through it, trying to find the remaining braids as they rounded the school gate.

"Aoba! Sei! Yoohoo, boys!"

Aoba and Sei stopped dead in their tracks, their faces contorting into expressions of pure dread.

"Oh no!" Sei said, clawing at his face with his hands.

"... Oh my God. He brought the Alphas," Aoba said, voice deadpan with disbelief. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"

Faces burning as their father flagged them over, Sei and Aoba accepted the hug that Toue gave them, but it was definitely more out of shock and horror than anything else.

"Did you boys have a good day? No one gave you trouble? I missed you!" Toue asked with a wide smile. Aoba saw one of the Alphas give a passerby a particularly threatening look.

"No..." Sei gasped, but Aoba groaned and wrestled himself from his father's grasp.

"We're fine, Dad! Can we just get in the car?"

"Tired, huh?" Toue asked. "That's fine! The chefs will have a delicious dinner ready for you when we get home. That'll replenish your energy before you start on your homework."

"Okay, good," Aoba said, trying not to sound too relieved. "Let's go."

One of the Alphas had already opened the back door of their father's limousine, and Aoba was only just starting to crawl across the car seat to make room for Sei and his father when he felt something touch his hair.

"Huh?" Aoba said, looking over his shoulder to find his dad holding one of the small braids Koujaku had put in his hair between two fingers.

"That's a cute hairstyle, son," Toue said, with a serious look. "Did that hairdresser boy you like do that for you?"

Toue withdrew his arm just in time to avoid it getting caught as Aoba slammed the car door shut.


Art drawn by Apricot.

Notes:

Aoba spends nearly every lunch break with Koujaku, whining about Toue while Koujaku plays with his hair.

Chapter 3: The PTA Meeting

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"... and this is Aoba and Sei when they were a few months old!" Toue exclaimed proudly, handing the photograph to the school principal so he could get the closer look he was obviously craving.

"Very interesting, sir," the principal replied, sounding defeated. "Now, if we could please move on to the matter of the working bee next month, and the funds for the building levy..."

"They looked like big babies for being twins," one of the mothers on the PTA noted, stealing a glance at Toue's photo over the principal's shoulder as she walked back from the water cooler. "When my girls were a few months old, they would have been half that size... and such beautiful long hair!"

"Oh, that's because my boys were born in..." Toue started, but he was cut off by the sound of the school hall's door swinging open with a loud creak.

"Hey, Dad," Aoba said, giving his Coil an annoyed look. "I thought you said you were just dropping in for a minute? My Coil's battery died and Sei's is almost dead, and... WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, DAD?!"

"Showing them your baby pictures," Toue replied, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Anyway, here's one of Aoba just after he was born!"

"Dad, you don't bring baby pictures to a PTA!" Aoba yelped, a look of pure horror on his face.

Toue grinned sheepishly and shrunk away from his son, looking slightly nervous. "Calm down, Aoba."

"I will not calm down!" Aoba said, looking around the room and catching sight of the amount of pictures his father had handed out to the PTA. He snatched away the rest of the photos that his dad was holding. "Urgh, I'll collect these!"

"... why is he black and white?" the principal questioned. "Is it a black and white photo? No... the blanket he's lying on is clearly blue..."

The entire hall fell into an uncomfortable silence, and everyone stared at Toue. Toue shrugged.

"Sometimes things don't go as planned when your sons are made in a--"

"Dad!" Aoba groaned, cheeks bright red as he started collecting the photographs. "That's enough!"

Toue shrugged again, and the hall remained engulfed in complete silence until Aoba dragged Toue out of his chair and to the exit door.


Art drawn by Apricot.

Notes:

Toue doesn't understand why people don't want to see photos of his beautiful albino lab babies.