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it’s not quite obvious for everyone, though he might know why. he’s secretly good at lying, though he might mock himself with the “burden” role. he’s went back to back from cities and he needs a rest. he missed his members a lot, he hasn’t hung out with them like he used to. he’s been way too busy going back to back from korea and china, and back again. thankfully, he gets to rest now, at least for a bit.
“hyung!” seungkwan runs to the older.
they’re all currently at hybe together, by a lobby. they’ve met up to talk about meetings, schedules, while also congratulating jun for flying back to korea. jun’s tired today, too. the members notice of course, so they go to their hard working member and embrace him like there’s no tomorrow.
“hyung, we missed you!” seokmin exclaims as he hugs the older tightly.
“you’ve worked hard, jun. take a break.” seungcheol pats the back of the younger.
jun just smiles. just seeing them makes him happy already.
“yah, don’t hog him! he just came back from his flight!” jeonghan comes into the scene.
“just say you want to hug him.” joshua rolls his eyes, arms crossed while watching the rest of his members from the side.
the members laugh while they obey their vice leader and part away from jun. jeonghan nods in satisfaction and walks up to the members.
“why’d you come so late?” wonwoo asks, half teasing the older.
“woke up late, so what?” jeonghan responds with an eye roll, knowing the younger’s intentions.
“you up for samgyupsal later, hannie? after fansign?” seungcheol asks while still being beside jun.
“sure.” jeonghan responds casually as he walks up to jun.
hm..
“junnie, oh my goodness! i missed you, you worked so hard!” jeonghan suddenly hugs the younger tightly.
jun’s eyes grow wide for seconds, but immediately hugs back after. seungcheol and joshua giggle as they look at each other. jun notices, but shrugs it off.
“rest well, okay? we still have a schedule later, rest well after we’re done with it, okay?” jeonghan parts from his tight hug and holds the younger’s hands. the younger can’t do anything but nod.
“we haven’t hung out with you much these days, jun.” soonyoung points out sadly, because it’s true. jun was so busy with his schedules and didn’t have much time to genuinely have fun with the members. maybe this time, he’ll make it up to them.
“yeah, but we need to let him rest first.” jihoon responds. jun just nods, feeling thankful for his fellow ninety-six liner friend.
“let’s eat out tomorrow, hyung! it’s been a while!” chan offers happily as jun nods, smiling.
“sure, chan. after i get my rest.” jun agrees calmly and softly as the youngest smiles.
“how was it, though?” minghao accidentally asks in chinese, in which it makes the older person laugh. minghao laughs, obviously flustered and ridiculed by himself.
“my schedules? it was fun, made new friends, got close with the cast. i also ate delicious foods there.” jun smiles while looking back at it. it was something to remember, but it would most likely be more memorable with his members.
and maybe with him?
“at least you enjoyed. you can rest today, okay?” the leader reassures the boy beside him. he noticed that the leader never left his side, and he’s thankful because the leader most likely knows how tired the younger is but can’t show it to his members since he doesn’t want to worry them. he’s thankful to his leader for that, and seungcheol knows it because jun never mentioned anything about the oldest staying by his side.
but then, jeonghan also stood by his side ever since he came.
he didn’t move an inch, he’s still holding hands with him too, though he didn’t even think about it earlier. his guess is that jeonghan noticed as well, and he should be thankful. he doesn’t speak his true thoughts to him, ever. he never really got to share those moments with him, at least not in a long while. he doesn’t remember if there was a last time or if it was long ago, but he’d like for it to happen again anyway. he’s someone jun feels relaxed with, and he also takes care of him a lot. he’s considerate and caring even to his three hyungs who adore him and watch over him. jeonghan also shows his love and affection with physical affection, so jun doesn’t really mind the older clinging onto him.
as the members chatter away, jun looks at his third and his youngest hyung, joshua. joshua who just watches his members chatter and laugh with each other, makes him happy as always. joshua notices jun’s gaze, so he looks at him and smiles. jun wears a smile on his face, with joshua nodding while smiling warmly and comfortingly. jun’s smile grew even wider at the sight of it. he looks at his members again.
it’s good to be home.
he’s suddenly reminded of something, and his smile wears off. he’s kind of upset with it, but no one else knows why. he forgot to mention, but what he’s thinking right now is what he meant by “good liar” and such. if he was always acting so strange in their mafia games, how come no one can spot him when he’s actually hiding something? and no way did his acting skills help, he wouldn’t believe it. it’s possible, but unbelievable. he doesn’t get it either, but what else can he say?
he’s especially troubled because he likes jeonghan.
he likes yoon jeonghan.
he fucking likes yoon jeonghan.
what?
fuck. i like yoon jeonghan.
now, he didn’t mean for the drop of honorific. but he likes his jeonghan hyung. what the fuck, honestly. it was all he can say to himself. when the fuck did he like the older? how? why? he won’t answer, he’s a bit too dizzy to even think. but wait, he likes jeonghan. only he knows that he gets a bit jealous whenever he sees the older hang out a lot with the leader, seungcheol. he knows they’re a famous duo in their fandom, and their chemistry is insane. he doesn’t want to interfere, he thinks they fit well together too. he knows he’s also a very well-known pair with minghao, but it’s all friendly with him. he’s just his little brother, nothing much.
all that said, he accepted that he likes the older a long time ago. he just especially went crazy today, maybe it’s because he’s tired? he doesn’t know. he thought it was just him, but fucking shit he was serious. he never expected himself to like a member, and it being jeonghan is also shocking because there’s all those duos and jun probably has no chance with the older. he may view the younger as his little brother whom he cares so much for, and it’s quite understandable and valid to the younger. but maybe, if given the chance, they could be together as lovers. god, he would love that so fucking much. if only he had a chance.
but, well, of course. it’s what jun thinks. no one knows the truth except for him and jeonghan.
“okay, now that it’s settled, let’s all just enjoy and good luck to those who’ll do their fansign later.” seungcheol finalizes. jun snaps out of it when he realizes he’s been out of it while they were discussing about their schedules and plans. fuck, that wasn’t intended at all.
“you were almost sleeping while we were talking, jun.” seungcheol informs the younger seriously but gentle.
“i know, sorry. i didn’t mean to.” jun apologizes as he looks down.
“it’s fine, you’re tired so you should rest.” seungcheol reassures and comforts the younger.
“thanks, hyung.” jun smiles at him, with the leader nodding in response.
fansign is finally done, jun can rest now.
the members get off their seats as they all stretch and sigh of relief. they bow and thank the staffs before leaving, being the nice and polite boys they are.
jun thinks about it again. maybe he can ask him? no, his hyung already asked jeonghan to hang out with him. he’ll probably cancel even if he asked. he knew it was his seungcheol hyung in the end and not him. but, he’s not bitter. what makes his jeonghan hyung happy makes him happy as well.
but jun can’t help but think so deeply that jeonghan immediately noticed it.
“junnie, is there something wrong?” concerned jeonghan asks.
“nothing, hyung. probably tired.” jun lies.
“are you sure? you know you can tell hyung, right?” jeonghan pats jun on the back, and this makes the younger more troubled than he is now.
what if i just ask him?
no. he wouldn’t accept his offer. he already has seungcheol. give it up.
“i wanted to hang out with you in my room, but you have plans with seungcheol hyung.” jun mumbles, his head looking down on the floor.
and at that moment, it’s as if everything was on cue.
“jun-ssi, it’s time to go.” a staff informed.
“jeonghannie, let’s go?” seungcheol calls from the other side as the leader arrives.
“i have to go now, enjoy hanging out with seungcheol hyung! bye!” jun smiles as he waves the older goodbye. jeonghan then goes to seungcheol’s side as he goes out.
there’s a thing that jun wanted to point out.
he can’t mumble in a voice that no one can hear, he can somehow make it loud and clear instead.
and that’s the main reason why jeonghan walked to the older feeling so sad.
jun arrives in his unit. it’s finally time to rest.
he throws himself down on his couch, allowing himself to breath for a bit. he thinks, what should i make? he hasn’t cooked himself delicious food in a while. maybe a simple bowl of ramyeon will do? or jokbal? no, a bit too much to cook for the evening. maybe he should make ramyeon and eat it while watching a movie? yes, that’s it! a date with himself, jun likes it.
it’s supposed to be with him, but he wouldn’t come.
he’ll do all those later, he’s dizzy as of the moment. right now, his brain can’t function properly. when he somehow gets too dizzy, everything feels unreal to him. so, he does things he wouldn’t ever think of doing because he knows it wouldn’t even happen in real life. but, he seems too out of it today, to the point that he picks up his phone and texts jeonghan.
(hang out with me pls?)
(just this once)
he puts his phone down and drifts off to sleep, unbeknownst to the series of events that will happen.
after a few hours, jun wakes up from his slumber. he wondered what he did just before he slept, he seems to not remember. he must’ve been too dizzy to remember. anyway, he’s hungry. he prepares to stand up when his door was knocking. he told them that the door is open, probably a staff member telling him about his schedules.
but to his surprise, jeonghan came.
“h-hyung?” jun stutters out of pure shock.
“i’m here, baby.” jeonghan pats the younger with a wide smile.
“why.. are you here?” jun asks, still shocked.
“you wanted to hang out with me, remember?” jeonghan reminds the younger with a smile.
fuck.
that’s what he did just before he slept? text or call the older to hang out with him as if it’s important? oh fuck, he feels bad. he knew something didn’t sit right. curse this stupid dizziness, or whatever made this happen anyway.
“i’m sorry, it’s not urgent or anything. you can go.” jun apologizes.
“i know, junnie. i’m not going, i’ll be hanging out with you tonight.” jeonghan sits beside the younger.
“you cancelled your plans with hyung just to be with me?” jun asks, still sad.
“yes, he doesn’t mind at all.” jeonghan reassures the younger.
“and then..” jun thinks for a second.
“you came?” jun looks at him, feeling bad. he’s a desperate fucker, he thinks.
“of course. you called, didn’t you?” jeonghan caresses the younger’s cheek.
“b-but.. is it.. okay?” jun asks, stuttering out of nervousness.
“jun.” jeonghan faces the younger and holds his hands.
“i’ll go every time you ask me to hang out with you, with no hesitation. remember that.” jeonghan comforts the younger.
“all you needed to do was ask, jun.”
“i would be there before you know it.”
jeonghan smiles at the younger who looks down in sadness. jeonghan feels bad, he must’ve wanted to hang with him since who knows when. how could he not notice? he’s a bad hyung to make his younger one feel left out like this.
especially when he loves him.
“what do you wanna do, hm?” jeonghan asks gently.
“i was planning on watching something while eating, but i wasn’t sure on what food i’ll make.” jun shyly informs the older, who attentively listens and nods.
“what did you want to eat?” jeonghan asks the younger.
“ramyeon, but i’m not sure what else.” jun admits.
“okay, i’ll make us our food. you can pick a movie for us.” jeonghan stands up.
“really? are you sure?” jun asks, shocked with what he heard.
“of course, lovely. let me make it up to you, hm?” jeonghan nods and softly caresses jun’s cheek again.
let me confess to you later.
jeonghan goes to the kitchen as jun picks a movie to watch. jun wonders, what movie can he pick? what if the older won’t like it? well apparently, jeonghan saw the younger struggle. so, he reminds the younger once more.
“pick any movie you want, junnie. anything is fine by me!” jeonghan shouts from the kitchen. jun looks at jeonghan, and the older smiles and nods in return. jun looks back at the television and picks a movie. jeonghan giggles at the sight.
fuck, he’s so cute.
jeonghan starts making the ramyeon, he opens the fridge and sees soju. did he plan on drinking with me? oh fuck me. now he really feels bad. to think that he must’ve planned to do all this with him but doubted because he was hanging out with seungcheol. it’s all his fault. a little bit of seungcheol’s fault. but it still is his fault. just then, his phone vibrates. he goes to check on his phone.
cheollie: (how’s the date? ㅋㅋㅋ)
hannie: (it’s great, seungcheol :) )
cheollie: (ㅋㅋㅋ what if you can’t hold yourself? -shua)
hannie: (???)
(are u with cheol rn?)
cheollie: (yea, i asked him -shua)
cheollie: (are u just gonna hang out with him?)
hannie: (fuck it cheol)
(i’m confessing to him later)
cheollie: (good)
hannie: (thanks)
(fuck u btw)
cheollie: (??)
jeonghan puts the phone down and continues cooking. he gets out the bottles of soju and the shot glasses. after lots of minutes, he brings out the food he made and puts it down on the table.
jun looks at the food in shock. his hyung made all of this? wow, he never knew the older can cook this well. the older goes back to bring out the bottles of soju. fuck, he found those? jun’s shocked. is jeonghan really willing to do all these with him? does he pity him? probably. no, most likely.
“have you picked a movie?” jeonghan sits beside the younger, putting down his phone. jun only nods in response.
as they eat and watch the movie, multiple emotions are let out as the two grow attached to the movie’s story and characters. the delicious food makes it even more immersive as the plates are emptied one by one. this is what i wanted. they want this to last. they wish, they hope, they dream. but they realize something—that it can only happen if one of them even makes a move on the other. that’s when jeonghan looks at the younger. he’s beautiful. at that moment, he thinks.
i wanna do it. i wanna do it. can i do it?
fuck it.
the movie’s finished, but he was looking at him. poor little soul, doesn’t know what to do. well, he doesn’t care, he can’t hold it in anymore. fuck that, i’m gonna do it.
“please help and guide me.” jeonghan whispers to himself as he intertwines his two hands.
“junnie, baby?” jeonghan calls the younger softly, and the younger turns to the other as he hears his name.
“why?” jun looks at the older, confused and nervous as he sees the older’s serious look towards him.
“listen to me, okay? i just need to say something.” jeonghan says with a gentle baby-like tone. jun gets more nervous, but nods anyway because of his hyung’s gentle tone.
jeonghan takes a deep breath. you can do this. he holds the younger’s hands and continuously caresses them with his thumbs as he holds them softly.
“i like you, since god knows when. i know it’s strange, but i really do. there was a time where i suddenly realized how badly i want to take care of you. how badly i want to show you my love for you. how badly i want to make you happy. how badly i want to be with you until the day we die. all those things, and cheol and shua made me realize that those thoughts aren’t in a friendly way anymore. i love you, more than anything. i smile everytime i think about it, to think that i love a person like you is special to me. it’s an honor.”
“i’m sad that i don’t get to hang out with you much because you’re too busy or you maybe have other plans. if you tell me to come to you, i would come immediately and you know that. ask me and trust that i will come to you as fast as i can.”
jun is stunned. the older loves him back? really?
“y-you mean it?” jun stutters out of nervousness.
“of course lovely. i love you, i’m so glad you came into my life and made me as happy as i’ll ever be.” jeonghan admits. he smiles ever so softly and lovingly.
“i.. do too. i don’t know when, but i felt the same way you did. when i realized it was love, i was stunned but happy later on. i only kept it to myself because i was too scared to tell anyone. actually.. i always wanted to ask you to hang out with me, but you already had plans with cheol hyung every time so i let it be because i thought you love him. if you were happy, then i’m happy. i just accepted the fact that i won’t be ending up with you. and after the fansign, i didn’t intend on mumbling it since it’s always loud, but you could’ve heard it so i ignored it so you would think that it was just you. when i texted you, i was too dizzy and my true intentions came out. right after i sent the text, i slept for a few hours and woke up before you came. i didn’t remember what i did when i woke up, but you reminded me and i felt so bad. i don’t know, hyung. it’s just that i love you so much to even care about myself.”
jeonghan feels bad.
jeonghan feels so fucking bad.
how would he hurt the love of his life like this? he should’ve known better. the younger thought like this all this time and he didn’t notice? such bad person his hyung is. it’s all my fault.
jeonghan cups the younger’s face and looks at him in sadness. “i’m sorry for making you feel that way. if you ever doubt me, just tell me and i will do everything i can to assure you that my eyes are on you and you only.” jeonghan smiles at the younger.
and as their bodies get closer without control, the two feel as if it’s the right moment. just pure love and assurance, everything feels comforting and right. and as they move closer, jeonghan looks at the younger. you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen.
jeonghan closes the gap between them as their lips touch. the kiss was soft, longing but comforting. it was something they longed to feel with each other. jeonghan pulls jun closer to him as he parts their lips. jeonghan admires the younger again, the most beautiful human being ever. he can’t hold himself, so he goes down to the younger’s neck and kisses it softly. after a few kisses, jeonghan eventually stops.
“sorry, got carried away. i just love you so much.” jeonghan kisses the younger’s hand as an apology. jun giggles at the sight of it.
“no worries, hyung. i.. kind of liked it.” jun admits shyly, which made the older form a smirk on his face.
“really?” jeonghan asks, a smirk on his face. the older knows that the two won’t just be sleeping tonight. jun just stares at him with eyes wide. oh he knows that the older had planned something for them later, but for now the older just laughs.
“jun.” jeonghan calls in a serious tone, while looking at the younger seriously.
“from now on, please be honest with me. if you have trouble trusting my actions towards someone, come tell me right away. if you doubt me, tell me. i will give you everything and i will do everything i can to assure you that i love you so much.” jeonghan says, slowly going to cup jun’s face. jun just looks at the older sadly, feeling bad that he has to be assured everytime he suspects the older.
“don’t feel bad, lovely, hm? i understand if you feel that way, it can’t be avoided. let me show you how much i love you, i’ll take care of you, okay?” jeonghan calms the younger from overthinking.
“what does this.. make us?” jun asks hesitatingly.
“what do you want us to be?” jeonghan asks the younger softly.
“..my boyfriend..” jun says shyly, embarrassed of saying it himself. jeonghan giggles at the sight.
“then, you’re my boyfriend now.” jeonghan smiles as he kisses the younger again.
“come here, love. let’s eat and watch now. cuddle up with me.” jeonghan gestures the younger to scooch closer to him as the younger follows.
they ate, drank, watched and enjoyed themselves all night whilst enjoying the presence of their boyfriend. the moment they’ve waited for had finally happened, and they made sure to cherish every bit of the moment.
jun eventually fell tired, so jeonghan assisted him to his bedroom. jeonghan changed and cleaned up, then made way to his boyfriend’s room to cuddle up with him. he kissed the younger goodnight, but that somehow made jun feel less tired than he was a while ago.
as the younger slept in the arms of the older, jeonghan looks at his boyfriend again. boyfriend. fuck, he’s my boyfriend. he can’t help but repeat the word so many times in his head. the person he’d been admiring since god knows when (that’s his words) is now his boyfriend. he managed to snatch the most beautiful person on earth, he definitely won.
cheollie: (how’d it go)
hannie: (he’s mine now)
cheollie: (omg really?!?! -shua)
hannie: ( u two still together?)
cheollie: (he’s with me tonight)
(we drank so it’s risky)
hannie: (okay then)
(btw fuck u again cheol)
cheollie: (i’ve been meaning to ask u abt that)
hannie: (he’s wanted to ask me to hang out with him since idk when but he hesitates everytime bcus you always ask me to hang out with you)
cheollie: (okay well fuck)
cheollie: (u also taking the blame for agreeing to it? -shua)
hannie: (obv)
hannie: (but cheol’s at fault too!!)
cheollie: (i’ll apologize to him tom)
hannie: (you better)
hannie: (okay i’ll see u guys tom)
hannie: (we also drank and my boyfriend is sleeping in my arms)
cheollie: (u didn’t have to say it like that yk -shua)
hannie: (i wanted to)
(hehe)
cheollie: (whatever -shua)
(night -shua)
(night han)
hannie: (night to the both of you)
jeonghan turns off his phone and drifts off to sleep, softly snuggling closer to his adorable and majestic boyfriend who’s peacefully sleeping in between his arms.
—
“everyone arrived early, huh?” soonyoung points out, impressed.
“more free time, soons.” wonwoo shrugs.
“touché.” soonyoung replies with a head tilt.
they all arrive early for dance practice the next day, a bit unusual for this group since they arrive exactly on time instead of being early. they’re usually spread out while waiting for practice, but they’re all just by the entrance to their practice room now, all complete.
“anyone wanna shop later with me and shua?” seungcheol announces.
“me!” seokmin immediately raises, seungcheol nods and looks at the other members.
“i might as well join.” soonyoung says, shrugging.
“me too!” seungkwan joins in excitedly.
“jeonghan hyung?” mingyu asks, quite confused.
“hm? what about me?” jeonghan hums confusingly.
“i mean, why aren’t you joining?” mingyu asks again, but makes it clearer for the older to understand.
“oh, no no. i’m not letting him join.” seungcheol immediately refuses.
“why not?” minghao asks, worriedly.
“reminds me!” seungcheol claps.
“jun, can we talk?” seungcheol looks at jun softly, to avoid scaring the innocent younger one.
the room somehow tenses just by hearing the older talk. jun gets scared as well due to the tension, so he looks at his boyfriend who’s beside him. jeonghan responds with an assuring smile and nods. that tells jun that it’ll be okay, so he goes to his leader as the oldest holds his hand and guides him to a seperate room.
jeonghan sees them leave, but the tension in the room is still there, and it’s strong. jeonghan looks at the other members, only to see them look at each other and shrug. jeonghan just playfully rolls his eyes and mentally sighs.
“why are you guys so tense? they didn’t fight, relax.” jeonghan laughs, assuring the rest of the members.
the room immediately went loud again, sighs of reliefs were heard and shoulders were seen drooped down and eased up. joshua laughs at the sight and looks at his best friend who is also laughing. it didn’t take long for the smart and observant jihoon to notice this, though.
“is there something we don’t know?” jihoon crosses his arms. he looks at the two alternatively with a brow raised.
“yeah hyung, did something happen?” chan asks innocently and curiously.
jeonghan smiles, unable to keep it in. he knew the kids would be sucking him up with questions once they catch on that something’s going on. call them curious, but jeonghan may not really agree with that. well, looking back at it, this time may not be a bad idea. he has this idea to flex the love of his life in front of the kids, out of just pure silliness and joy.
that’ll have to wait, he needs to handle his other best friend (at least by a half) who keeps teasing his face about him and his new boyfriend.
“gosh, you’re so whipped.” joshua rolls his eyes, in which jeonghan did back at his friend as well.
“spill already!” seungkwan says impatiently.
“calm down, seungkwan. let jeonghan hyung take his time.” hansol said, ridiculed at seungkwan’s behaviour just seconds before.
dokyeom laughs at seungkwan, the younger pouting visibly shows that he’s sulky and wants to know. the younger doesn’t like that the other members know something they can laugh at without him, he somehow wants to be involved (and he still wonders why his members call him an attention seeker).
“okay, this is chaotic. can everyone calm down and just listen?” chan interferes, because mainly he’s just very eager to know.
and knowing the members, they laugh at it. chan doesn’t mind, he’s lived like that for almost ten years.
“okay, okay. calming down for a few seconds,” minghao manages to calm them down.
“hyung, is it a big deal? like, this.. thing we don’t know?” minghao asks, wanting to clarify.
“it is, yeah.” jeonghan almost immediately nods.
“go ahead and spill. i can’t remember much from last night anyway because of my dizziness. must’ve been tipsy, i don’t know.” joshua speaks up—arms crossed while leaning against the wall.
“basically me and jun got together but jun said something that me and cheol felt bad for, so i apologized last night while cheol’s apologizing right now.” jeonghan briefly explains, but the members remain confused. joshua looks at the kids momentarily until he notices the confusion not leaving their faces. joshua just laughs and jeonghan sighs at the sight. so much for a brief summary.
“here, i’ll tell everything..”
—
“jun?” seungcheol calls out.
“yeah?” jun responds, still scared.
“relax, i won’t scold you or anything.” seungcheol softly says. “in fact, i’ll be apologizing.”
jun hums, head tilted sideways in confusion.
“last night, jeonghan told me that you couldn’t ask out jeonghan because i always ask him first.” seungcheol reminds.
oh.
it’s about that..
“oh.. i’m just.. it’s my fault, hyung.. really..” jun stutters, refusing the older.
“listen to me, jun.” seungcheol makes him sit down by the sofa, and holds his hands.
“why didn’t you tell me? if you wanted to hang out with him, why didn’t you tell me? you know i would never want to hurt you, right? i’m disappointed in myself because i never noticed that you wanted to hang out with him, too." seungcheol starts, sighing out of pure disappointment and guilt for himself.
“i knew jeonghan liked you, jun. if anything, i would be happy you’d ask him to hang out with you. whenever we would hang out, all his sentences have your name. seriously, it’s funny how downbad the dude is.” seungcheol lightly chuckles as jun smiles weakly.
“he wouldn’t stop imagining how things were if you two got together. oh god, jeonghan would die just thinking about it.” seungcheol laughs again, ridiculed by his friend.
“i’m really sorry if i made you troubled for years, jun. i don’t even think it’s jeonghan’s fault for agreeing, but it’s completely my fault that i get in the way of your attempts to be closer to jeonghan. promise, if i ever found out earlier, i would’ve helped you as much as i can.” seungcheol looks at the younger’s hands as he caresses them slowly.
“why didn’t you tell me, hm? i would’ve understood why, i would’ve helped. i’m so sorry for not noticing, jun. i don’t know how to make it up to you because me and jeonghan are so close that people speculate us to the point that you would overthink about it.” seungcheol looks at jun ever so sadly.
choi seungcheol, the leader of the group, hurt one of his beloved brothers. why would he do such a thing? he felt like a disappointment, to make jun think such things. he was the reason why it took so long for the couple to be together. he will note that in mind for years now, carrying the guilt on his shoulders forever.
“it was never your fault, hyung. i really don’t blame anyone for anything. i’m just a coward to just go up to anyone and ask them to hang out. in the end, i would always hint out at them until they ask me, instead of me asking them. i feel ridiculous.” jun looks down, unable to get eye contact with the older.
“we all understand you, jun. we all take it into consideration. we’re just disappointed that we can’t make you relaxed and eased enough to ask us straightforwardly. we’ll all take care of you better from now on, jun. i’m sorry.” seungcheol responds, feeling bad for the younger.
jun looks up at his leader slowly, tears gathered inside his eyes that look like they’re ready to burst out any minute. seungcheol immediately notices, and gets closer to hug the younger. as he does the action, jun finally lets out the tears. seungcheol can only pat and hug with comfort, considering what he did to him. it didn’t take long before jun eventually calmed down and let go. seungcheol told him to take his time to breathe and calm down, and as jun says he’s okay, they both head back to the rest of the members.
“really?!” dokyeom shouts, covering his mouth out of pure shock.
“really.” joshua casually answers the younger, visibly showing how much the older is used to it already.
“congratulations though hyung. it was unexpected, but we’re all happy for you both.” jihoon remains his cool presence as he casually congratulates the older.
“you can now stop bombarding my chat inbox with every message bubble having jun’s name.” joshua rolls his eyes. he has put up a lot of jeonghan’s blabber about jun for years, it’s amazing that he hasn’t gone insane and would lead for him to do the cupid work instead of jeonghan himself.
“nah, i like to see you suffer.” jeonghan laughs teasingly.
“the contrast of personality is so obvious that it makes me so irritated.” seungcheol comments as he walks back with jun giggling at his leader’s words. he can’t deny it though, the drastic change of personality jeonghan goes through when he’s with him really is insane (and probably irritating for others) to see.
“you expect me to be a badass to the love of my life?” jeonghan raises a brow, crossing his arms. he maintains a sassy posture until the two have fully walked back to their places.
“anyway, anyhow.” soonyoung abruptly interrupts the elders.
“all is settled, when is practice?” chan looks around, hoping to gain information.
“exactly an hour later. we still have time to do what we want.” wonwoo answers for the youngest.
“wait, so who’s coming later?” mingyu brings up another topic.
“coming to what?” seungcheol raises a brow, not remembering a bit of what he said earlier.
“grocery choi seungcheol, come on!” joshua grabs an opportunity to tease.
“excuse you, joshua hong!” seungcheol replies, rather offended by what he heard.
“booseoksoon so far, right?” hansol inserts himself into the conversation.
“i’ll join, i’m bored anyway.” wonwoo raises his hand voluntarily.
“same for me, then.” mingyu volunteers.
“how many of you are coming?” seungcheol asks, confused and overwhelmed.
“let’s see.. me, wonwoo hyung, soonyoung hyung, dokyeom, seungkwan,” mingyu recalls and counts using his fingers.
“adding seungcheol hyung and shua hyung makes seven.” dokyeom adds.
“what’re you guys shopping for?” minghao asks.
“they’re probably gonna have a feast after practice.” jun responds with a guess.
“to celebrate the comeback? seems appropriate, are we invited?” jeonghan gets intrigued.
“all the members are.” seungcheol simply answers, and the members happily cheer after.
“okay! let’s all do well later and celebrate our comeback! fighting, everyone!” soonyoung cheers, instantly lifting up the mood of the lobby.
as always, a comeback needs to exceed the last. it’s not always good to carry that kind of pressure, but a challenge always awaits them and drives them to do better than before for their fans. people naturally have that kind of expectation when making a comeback, and they honestly don’t like it that much. but, at least the outcomes are almost always positive.
to celebrate the successful preparation for the comeback (and hopefully for successful promotions and outcomes), the members have gathered in jun’s apartment. apparently, jun has lots of food he wants to make for the members and just can’t bring himself to give a whole lot of effort for it at someone else’s house. he seems to be more comfortable cooking somewhere more familiar-looking. it seems weird, but it’s just how he likes it.
“you can rest for today, jun. let us cook instead, hm?” seungcheol suddenly interrupts with a soft hum.
“really? but, i want to cook for you guys.” jun responds in a sad tone, disappointed by what he heard.
“you just came back yesterday. please rest and eat well.” seungcheol insists with a slight worry heard in his tone.
“you can cuddle with your boyfriend in your room if you want.” seungcheol teases, not being able to hold his smirk as it lets itself out evidently in his face.
“i would love that very much.” jeonghan interrupts, his hair bouncing as he casually makes his way to the two men with a warm smile.
“take a break jun, seriously. you’ve worked hard, you deserve it.” joshua also comes into the scene, patting the latter on the shoulders as he enters from behind him.
“okay then, if you all say so.” jun sighs as he gives up, with the other three men smiling and nodding in satisfaction as jun made the right choice.
“let’s go, love.” jeonghan hums, and says with a soft and gentle voice. he leads the way as he holds his lover’s hand on the way to jun’s bedroom.
jeonghan then proceeded to lock the door, to prevent the other members from invading their alone time. jeonghan stops for a moment and looks at jun. he looks so beautiful. he can’t believe he’s his, forever. jeonghan always dreamed for this kind of moment, just the two of them cuddling in bed while letting the night pass by without a care. though it might not exactly be the case as of the moment, it came true anyway.
“is there a problem?” jun stares at the older in confusion, with his head tilted and eyebrows furrowed. he then proceeds to cross his arms.
“you look really beautiful, my love.” jeonghan genuinely compliments as he admires the latter’s features carefully. if only he knew what words to use, he would’ve used them all. but, no words can describe how beautiful he looks. not just in the current moment, but all the time.
“are we just going to stand here or..?” jun points out, with slight embarrassment showing because he didn’t want to point it out himself. he didn’t want to show needy for the cuddles. whether jeonghan would tease or not is not his problem, he’s receiving it either way.
“okay, lay down comfortably.” jeonghan gestures as jun immediately lies down in a comfortable position, which makes jeonghan giggle because of how excited his lover is to cuddle him for the first time. jeonghan follows, lying down in a slightly higher position than jun’s.
jun’s at jeonghan’s shoulder height position, which means he can perfectly lie down on it with no problem. he proceeds to lay his head down on jeonghan’s shoulder, snuggling up closer to the older. jeonghan intertwines their hands together, with jeonghan kissing jun’s hand after. jun puts his leg on top of jeonghan’s and fixes his position, while jeonghan puts his right arm around jun while he plays with his hair. jeonghan can’t help but repeatedly kiss the younger’s hands over and over again, the spark always tingles inside him in a way that makes him settled with what is happening at the moment.
“let’s do this tomorrow, too. i like this feeling. a comforting feeling that i just don’t feel with anyone else other than you.” jeonghan kisses the younger’s hand again, his voice full of adoration and sincerity.
they stayed like that for thirty five minutes, telling their most random thoughts to each other, each sharing their scary stories while fully adoring their way of telling it, sharing words of wisdom to each other, singing comforting songs that fit the mood, share their idol life, their schedules, their lives as a member of seventeen, and more. they promised to make this a routine whenever they’re together in one room, cuddling up to each other while having late night talks about all sorts of stuff is just perfect for them.
those thirty five minutes were unfortunately over, as it has been interrupted with a knock on the door. a member knocked three times, and jeonghan could tell it was seungcheol just from how it sounded when he knocked.
“eo?” jeonghan shouts, responding to the knocks whilst knowing it needed a response.
“food’s ready.” seungcheol informs, and waits for the other to answer before walking away from the bedroom door.
“got it!” jeonghan shouts back immediately, leading seungcheol to nod and leave the door as he heads back to his members. the members don’t disrupt the two lovers at all, they know they deserve the break and they gave it to them. they need the energy for later, anyway.
jeonghan and jun finally stand up. they both fix their clothes and their hair respectively as they make sure it looks neat. they also help fixing each other’s hair to make it look more neater. jeonghan then leads the way to the door, but stops after getting an idea. jun, who is left confused, just hums and tilts his head with arms crossed.
jeonghan slowly pulls him closer, as he receives the younger’s body and holds his waist. jeonghan’s left arm holds jun’s waist, while his right arm holds his face, as if it was so delicate that it could break at any given time. jeonghan gently brushes off the hair from jun’s face as he tucks in the extra hair behind the ear. he slowly leans in, and stops for a moment. he can’t help but admire his lover again, he just looks too beautiful to resist. he smiles warmly at the younger while admiring him closely.
he then leans into his lips as he closes the gap.
the kiss was surprisingly comforting for them, it was sweet, and it felt soft. they admired how the other’s lips felt, and they think it can happen more often. they proceed to kiss each other for a longer amount of time, getting addicted to each other’s taste. jeonghan separates them from the kiss and gives him one last peck.
“i love you so much, my moon.”
“i love you too, my bunny.”
they take a moment and stay in their position, not wanting to let go so easily. it took a while, but jeonghan now finally unlocks the door as both go outside the room. they are immediately greeted by the members loudly, but it’s an average experience for them at this point.
“finally!” joshua sighs, shoulders drooping at the sight of the two.
“we kind of slept for a bit before we stood up, it was way too comfortable in there.” jeonghan swiftly lies ever so professionally, as expected from seventeen’s best liar.
“good thing for that, you would’ve waited for another dish to be ready. seungkwan made it late.” soonyoung points at seungkwan, who had just arrived back from the kitchen.
“masterpieces should never be rushed!” seungkwan defends himself, pointing his index upwards.
“that is true.” jihoon acknowledges and nods.
“well.. ah.. fine..” soonyoung stutters before giving up and acknowledging seungkwan’s defense.
“okay, everyone come over!” mingyu shouts, and everyone gathers around the big table as seungcheol makes a speech.
“it’s another year for us. we slowly worked our way up towards the fame we have now, and records have been going in left and right. thank you to every single one of you, you all worked hard.” seungcheol says, loud and proud for all to hear.
“i want to especially thank some members. of course, jihoon, for producing our music. you deserve to be rich.” seungcheol looks at the other proudly and nods, while sneaking in a joke in the last part.
“when do we get that private airplane?” soonyoung jokingly mumbles, but just loud enough for the rest to hear. they all laugh and jihoon denies.
“to hoshi, who is always on the look out for us during our practices.” seungcheol looks at soonyoung and nods proudly.
“to the foreign line, especially jun and myungho. you all worked hard promoting seventeen in your countries, and you all deserve the recognition you have and will have in the future. we are always proud of you all.” seungcheol looks at the foreign line, whom all gives a warm smile at their leader.
“and again, to the rest of the members. we wouldn’t have done it without every single one of you.” seungcheol looks around, and sees the members nodding proudly.
“cheers, to another year and more to come!” seungcheol finally shouts as they join their glasses together for a clink. some proceed to drink, and some leave it on the table.
they all sit down as they process all the delicious food the members have made. just like before, they tell each other stories and play games to pass the time. each having their own funny, ridiculous, scary, and happy experiences to share. they happily take all their worries away as they let the mood and vibe of the moment waste them because the night’s still young.
most people went home wasted, except those who needed to take the rest home. jeonghan slept with jun and proceeded to have a long late night talk while cuddling until they both fall asleep in each other’s arms. jeonghan wasted himself quite a bit, he was actively participating in the drinking games and has also lost some times too. jun woke up earlier as a result, and proceeded to make hangover soup after cleaning himself.
jeonghan then wakes up moments later, he fixes himself in the bathroom and gets ready to go outside. his head still hurts quite a bit from that alcohol. and he’s really not lying when he tells himself that jun could cure him immediately, which he can totally see. expecting the lover outside, he goes outside of the bedroom and sees jun at the kitchen. he rushes to the younger as quickly as possible and greets him with a warm back hug.
“good morning my love.” jeonghan buries his face on jun’s shoulders as he looks over the food, while still in a back hug position. jun immediately receives the back hug and rubs the older’s head.
“good morning, head hurts?” jun asks, and jeonghan cutely nods. jun laughs, and momentarily stirs the soup. jun then covers the pot and lets it boil.
jeonghan lets go of the hug and turns jun to face him. they go to an empty counter, as jeonghan holds him by the waist and jun’s beautiful face. he then proceeded to kiss jun so sweetly, slowly getting more addicted as it goes on. their soft lips that are hard to forget, the taste that can’t ever be resisted, they can never let go of it all.
jeonghan finally separates and gives him one final kiss. “i’ll make us some ramyeon, i’ll go check on the food there since i saw you store it there a while ago.” jeonghan lets go of the other as he looks at the food.
but jeonghan, being the down bad man he is for his lover, pulls him back and puts him back into that position. jeonghan leans in and touches the other’s forehead while smiling warmly.
“i love you my moon, a lot more than i can say or imagine.”
“i love you too, i always will.”
their day proceeded amazingly. jun got what he wanted, a break with the members and a break with his lover. he hung out with chan like he promised, and he had fun as always. though he still has schedules to go back to, minghao is there with him this time. at least he has a member that’ll be with him for the long duration of doing their schedules in china. he often calls jeonghan, telling him about his day. and whenever he and minghao came back, they would always be welcomed with bright smiles and warm hugs. he’s finally home, not just with jeonghan.
he’s home. he’s with seventeen, and he wouldn’t ever trade it for anything else.