Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Did she have to choose fencing?” Utena grunted while they waited in the parking lot outside the practice building. “There are so many other sports!”

“It’s probably because you dislike it so much, you know.” Anthy smiled from the drivers seat. “Teenagers have to be contrarian.”

“Doesn’t it bother you?”

“Fencing is fencing, it’s just a sport and it has nothing to do with the duels.”

“I know.” Utena leaned her arm on the door of the car and let her head rest on her palm.

“Utena…” Anthy said softly, “You have to hide your feelings about fencing better. I know it’s hard for you but it’ll drive her away if she thinks you’re not supportive.”

“It’s not that I’m not proud of her, I really am I just…”

Anthy picked up where her partner trailed off, “You just see yourself fighting for my fate in a sick game orchestrated by my vile brother, I know. I see it too but we have to get over it or we’ll lose her one day.”

Utena put her hand on Anthy’s thigh in a comforting gesture and Anthy’s landed on hers. She stopped leaning at the window and faced her. She could se no scorn in her wife’s face, only soft concern. “I’ll try harder, I promise.”

The doors opened and the young fencers welled out with their sabres in their bags and helmets under their arms. Among them their daughter of fourteen, Ran. Once a happy, though a bit shy, child, now an angry teenager. She spoke with a couple of teammates and waved them off when they left, waited a little then trotted over, opened the back door of their modestly sized car and struggled the sword-bag in first.

“How did it go, sweetie?” Utena beamed back at her.

“We’ve talked about this.” Ran grunted and closed the door. “Either park a few streets down or come just one of you.”

Utena frowned and Anthy feigned offense. “Homophobia? From my own child?”

“It’s not that! It’s that you’re embarrassing in every other way.” Ran said with all the exasperation she could muster. “And maybe I’ll want to ease into things here a little before I introduce my pet monkey and my lesbian moms.” Utena could see her in the side mirror crossing her arms and distantly looking out the window.

“No one should give you a hard time if they meet you in the piste.” She really was proud of her progress despite the choice of sport, Ran was an excellent fencer.

“Aunt Juri says never to sort out your emotional problems through fencing.” Ran said with a big eye-roll that she also caught in the side mirror. ‘Aunt Juri’ had an ever looming presence in the Tenjou household since Ran had started idolising her. She’d seen her fence when she was seven, one of Juri’s last matches before she’d retired and it had inspired the rest of Ran’s upbringing. Juri had become a legendary fencer and Ran would collect clips and articles about her, often coaxing her into practicing with her whenever she was over, which she was more often now that they’d found Ran liked her so much. Juri had never struck them as someone who enjoys the company of children but her self proclaimed title as ‘aunt’ suggested otherwise, at least when it came to their daughter. ‘I fought your mom before, you know.’ Juri had started to a gawking 10 year old Ran and Utena had hopped in immediately to disarm the statement. ‘Lousy school tournament, I only fenced for a year and I obviously didn’t beat Juri.’ Juri’s eyebrow had raised but she’d played along. They never spoke about Ohtori. That was the most Ran had ever heard about their adolescent years and they’d agreed to keep it that way for as long as possible.

“Well there’s always the back alley then.”

“Are you encouraging violence to our daughter?” Anthy gave her a playful side eye but quickly turned her eyes back on the road as she drove.

“I would never!” She responded then turned back to Ran. “How are you feeling here so far?”

“It’s fine.” Ran shrugged.

“There are lots of schools around here and it’s really no problem on our part to have you transferred again. The moment anything feels wrong, tell us. We’ll move you around every school if we have to.”

“We just want you to be happy, Ran.” Anthy chimed in.

“I know.”

____________________

“We’re doing a project in school on ancestry.” Ran said, side-eyeing them from her homework, examining her mothers’ reactions.

Her ma, Anthy was a small, soft spoken woman with a way of hiding her true feelings well. It made her scarier when Ran could tell she was angry as whatever anger seeped through must then be overflowing from all the anger she hid, but it also made her playful moments all the more surprising as you could never predict them. She’d always thought her ma had an air of mystery to her, like she was a riddle she couldn’t quite solve or a puzzle with missing pieces. She’d tried to emulate her when she was younger, even insisting on wearing a bindi too, just like she did but at some point she’d started feeling disappointed that she’d never be quite as pretty as she thought her ma was so she’d stopped. Around the same time she’d also shaved half her hair off and dyed just the top black, leaving an underside of bright violet. It was a step towards finding her own identity. Anthy was doing some sort of paperwork at the kitchen table but tore her eyes from it to look across the table at Ran in quiet inquiry.

Her other mother, Utena, who she called mom, was a lot the opposite of Anthy. Her face always told what she was thinking and she was much more sociable, always the one to talk to any friends she’d brought over. Sometimes she’d worry her friends liked her mom more than they liked her. She wore her hair cropped so short she’d recalled the other children at daycare assuming she was her dad. Throughout her schooling, kids would sometimes, annoyingly, still ask her if Utena was like her dad to which Ran would simply tell them ‘I wouldn’t know, I don’t have a dad’. She wished she was like Utena in some ways too. She made it look so easy to talk to people and make them like you. Ran herself was shy and awkward and often said the wrong thing then fretted about it before closing her eyes to sleep at night.

Utena played with Chuchu, the family monkey, where she was sitting by the side of the table between her and Anthy and excitedly leaned forward at Ran’s statement. “Really?”

“Yes. We’re supposed to research one line of our family history.”

“That’s so exciting!” Her mom beamed. “You know, apparently my father’s side is linked to some interesting historical figures, I can’t remember which but I’m sure I can ask my aunt-“

“I’m not doing you” Ran cut in. “I’m doing ma.”

Anthy put her pen down gently. “I don’t have family.”

“Everyone has family.”

“Not me, not that you’d be able to find. You should go by your grandfather like your mom suggested. I’d be more interested to see what you find there, dear.”

Ran knew this was a lie because in reality the project had already started a week ago and she’d already found something. She’d known she wanted to know more about Anthy but that she wouldn’t tell her anything, she’d tried asking before, and that’s why she’d found herself very carefully memorising the spot of each document she’d brought out of the drawer in their bedroom so that she could place them all back in order, her investigation hopefully going unnoticed.

There was also the mystery of herself that she couldn’t get any straight answers about. Ran had been told her whole life that both of them were her mothers but at some point growing up she’d come to understand that this was impossible, though no matter how much she pressed they stood firm in that they were both her parents which was annoying her more the older she got. Eventually they’d started to add ‘We’ll tell you more about it when you are older’, which to Ran only meant please keep believing this until we decide you’re old enough to have your world shattered. So Ran had taken measures into her own hands. She didn’t want to wait until they decided she could know. She knew Utena was her mother, there were photos of her pregnant and so she must have had a father somewhere somehow, answers, she’d also been hoping to find in the document drawer. She’d turned up empty on any leads on whatever allowed her existence but she’d found something else. Expired passports. Recent ones had all their names down as Tenjou, as was their family name, her mothers had gotten married outside the country. However, she also found a couple from long ago that called them Tenjou Utena and Himemiya Anthy.

Anthy had never told her her family name and she’d never thought to ask, though she doubted she’d ever tell with the way she loved keeping secrets. She’d taken the passport and hidden it in her bed-frame before they’d returned. Next class she’d used the school computer to search for ‘Himemiya Anthy’, nothing appearing until she tried a register tool they had temporary access to while doing their project which allowed them to browse through a vast amount of various registers reaching far back in history. Oddly this search turned up several Himemiya Anthys spanning decades at a school called Ohtori Academy, which she didn’t quite know what to make of, popular name perhaps? Though only one was listed in the same class as a Tenjou Utena in 1997. Further research on this school turned up another interesting thing. The Chairman as seen in just a couple of photos shared a striking resemblance to her ma. His name was down as Ohtori Akio. Switching Anthy’s name to Ohtori Anthy turned up nothing but switching Akio’s to Himemiya Akio turned up a black and white photo that was definitely him. Anthy did have family. She’d gone as far as to email him and he’d even replied a day later confirming that he was her ma’s brother and given her a phone number. This conversation was a last chance for them to tell her the truth before she found it herself.

“But I must have grandparents on your side.”

“No.”

“Not even a distant uncle or something?” She said it as casually and innocently as she could. Anthy’s face remained unchanged.

“No.” A lie. She had the chance and she lied.

“Do you just not want me to research you because you’re not my real mother?” Ran said smugly. She knew this would upset them but they’d already upset her first.

“Ran!” Utena exclaimed, “Why would you say that?”

She watched Anthy as she sat unmoving, simply watching her like she was a mildly interesting film.

Ran shrugged. “Because it’s true, isn’t it?”

“No it’s not. Apologise to your ma right now!” Her mom scolded but Ran decided not to let it bother her.

“Why?” I have no proof that she’s actually my mother.” This one was unfair, she knew it but she was angry, it felt good to say.

“Ran,” Anthy finally said in her usual steady tone “Have I not brought you up as my daughter and loved you since your birth?” Her green eyes showed no sign of the anger and upset so clearly visible in Utena’s narrow blue ones. Anthy was like an unmoving mountain. She always had been. While Utena could bark and argue, Ran could sometimes bend her to her will and maybe win halfway. There was no bending Anthy. You can’t fight a mountain.

“It doesn’t matter,” Ran tried and Anthy tilted her head.

“Doesn’t it?” If she lied and said their relationship didn’t matter to try to hurt her feelings again, she’d know she was lying and she’d lose. If she’d take it back, she’d also lose. Couldn’t she just raise her voice and argue like a normal person? It was infuriating how disarmed she was starting to feel with that calm voice talking back to her almost making her feel stupid for getting so rallied up in the first place so she held on hard to the reason she was so mad. They’d lied. Again.

“You never tell me anything! Who are you? How did you have me?” She tried.

“We’ll tell you everything when you’re a bit older, we’ve promised you.”

“I AM older!”

“No.” She said still composed. “You’re just fourteen.”

“Look, Ran.” Utena tried, now calmer than before. “Some things need to wait, we’re not keeping things from you just to keep them from you. We will tell you everything but in the meantime can you please not hurt your ma’s feelings about it?”

An opening.

“What feelings? She isn’t even mad. Does she even have feelings?” Anthy’s expression didn’t change so she smiled smugly at her point proven. Utena stood up.

“Go to your room.” She said and pointed but Ran was already leaving in something that felt like both triumph and loss at the same time but she didn’t go to her room. She yanked her coat off it’s hangar and slammed the front door to the apartment.

____________________

“Ran!” Utena shouted after their daughter and started to get up but Anthy put her hand over her forearm.

“Let her have her space.” Utena sat back down and Anthy continued, “She said uncle… Do you think she knows something?”

“I think it was just a figure of speech.” It wasn’t quite enough for Anthy to let it go but it’d do for now so she nodded. Utena searched her face with large blue eyes, “She shouldn’t be saying that stuff to you.”

“It’s fine.”

“No it’s not. You’re as much her mother as I am.”

“I know.”

“But apparently she doesn’t...” Utena stroked her thumb over the back of her hand and looked down at it, considering. Anthy already knew what she’d say, “Should we tell her? I didn’t know she was so angry over this.”

Anthy sighed. “She’s so young still.”

“We don’t have to tell her everything, we could just tell her about how we had her, that you have magic.”

“We can’t tell her one thing without telling it all.”

Utena tilted her head. “I don’t understand why.” In earlier years she might have gotten frustrated at this point. Anthy had had to work a lot on trying to express what’s going on inside of her even when it felt too large to describe while Utena had to practice not making assumptions and staying patient when she didn’t understand something. She did it so effortlessly now and Anthy treasured it dearly because her own part still felt difficult. She looked for her words and Utena waited.

“She’d see me differently.” She said finally. “And then she’d see me differently again if we told the rest later. I don’t think I can bear it more than once.”

Aside from the big feat of creating a life, she’d used magic throughout the years in smaller, mostly unnoticeable ways. Like soothing Ran’s teething, healing the sickest animals at her vet clinic, appearing on time when she got out late and summoning lots and lost of napkins throughout Ran’s infancy. She could do a lot more but she’d wanted to live a mostly normal life. She sometimes wondered if Ran may have inherited at least some of her abilities too with the way bugs squished by her daycare mates had seemed to perk up in her hands or that toy she was sure had changed colour… But even in the best case scenario in which daughter was happy to learn about her magic, she couldn’t stand the thought of it only being seen as a good thing when she’d used it to cause so much pain in the past. To not see both the Witch and the Rose Bride was to misunderstand them both.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to tell her at all, you know but in that case, I think maybe we should think of something else to tell her. We can’t have her thinking you’re not her mother. It wouldn’t make much difference anyway, would it?”

Anthy shook her head. “I don’t want to lie to her. I want her to know us, it’s just too early.”

“Too early for her or too early for you?” Her tone was gentle and the question revealed something about herself that she hadn’t considered before.

“I don’t know.”

Utena nodded and got up, squeezed Anthy’s shoulder and kissed the top of her head. “Let’s think some more about how to deal with this. I’m going to make dinner.”

“Do you want help?”

“Absolutely not.”

Chapter Text

The air was chilly outside the apartment building. Ran had a vague memory of living somewhere else in the first few years of her life. Somewhere with fewer rooms and no elevator.
She fished her phone out of her jacket pocket as she walked, and called the number from her email. He might not pick up after hours if it’s a business phone, she thought as the signals went.

Then she heard a crackling sound and loud wind. She forgot to breathe.

“Ohtori Akio, Chairman of Ohtori Academy, to whom do I have the pleasure of speaking?” His voice was smooth and gentle.

“I- Hello!” She started, feeling like she was forgetting every word she knew immediately. “My name is Tenjou Ran, you gave me your number in an email.”

“Ah,” She thought she could hear him smile. “I was hoping you’d call. I understand you are my niece.”

“I think so.” She’d practiced this conversation in her head. It was already going nothing like she’d rehearsed.

“I’d really love to invite you to the Ohtori Academy so we can have a proper chat over some tea but unfortunately I’m out of office this week on business in Funabashi.”

She stopped walking and almost dropped her phone. “That’s my town.”

“Is it? What a delightful coincidence. Listen, I was really excited to hear that I’ve become an uncle and I’d very much like to meet you. I was just on my way to dinner if you’d like to join me? As long as your parents think it’s okay of course.”

She couldn’t pass this up. “I’ll ask,” she said and put her phone on mute then imagined herself asking and receiving a yes in hopefully close to the amount of time it’d really take then unmuted again. “They say it’s fine.”

“Excellent! Where are you?”

She told him the street and the number and minutes later a red convertible that looked both vintage and expensive pulled up next to her. The driver looked mostly like he had in the photos she’d found from around the time her mothers had attended his school, though granted, older. He didn’t have that pony tail she’d seen in the pictures but his silvery lavender hair kept a similar fall that framed his face well. He had light creases around his eyes and she guessed he must be in his fifties’. He was handsome in a similar way those middle aged men in Hollywood movies were.

“Tenjou-san?” He smiled from the convertible.

Her heart drummed in her chest. The only extended family she’d ever met before was her great aunt.

“Hop on in,” he invited and she unfroze to walk over and open the car door. For a split second she heard Utena and Anthy in her head drilling her. ‘Never enter a strangers car, no matter if they offer you sweets or kittens,’ ‘Don’t ever let a stranger take you anywhere,’ She hesitated on the handle. He wasn’t a stranger though, he was her uncle. He’d even made sure she asked her parents if she could go, if he was a kidnapper he was a really bad one. She got in.

“Tenjou Ran…” He said thoughtfully while he drove. “My sister must have raised you with Tenjou Utena then. I’m glad to know they’re still together.” He smiled warmly.

“Yeah. They’re married.”

He let out a chuckle, “I never thought my sister would get married.”

“Oh, they got married in the Netherlands.”

“I see,” They were quiet for a while. Ran had a million things she wanted to ask him but nothing came out. The silence felt oppressive and she was relieved when he broke it. “I’m really glad they let you come out with me. Truth be told, I’ve been estranged from my sister for a long time. I’ve considered reaching out but I’ve been a coward. Has she ever spoken about me?” There was something so distant and lonely about him as he said this.

“I only recently found out you existed.” It seemed less cruel than a ‘no’.

“I could say the same about you.” She couldn’t help but wonder what had brought him and her ma apart, the way he spoke so warmly. He seemed so kind.

At the restaurant he’d told her she could have anything she wanted. It was western and on the more fancy looking side with colourful food descriptions in the menu that, to a fancier person perhaps, should sell the dishes on how high quality or maybe eccentric the ingredients were but to Ran just made it difficult to imagine what the food was supposed to be. The names were all in french too giving her no clues. She felt a sense of not belonging here and she wondered if the staff would scoff at her if they knew how clueless she was. She wound up ordering ‘the same as him’.

They were served their drinks, Akio a glass of wine, she, a sparkling lemonade. She’d eyed the wine and he’d noticed. “Do you want to try it?” A hint of mischief flashing in his deep green eyes.

She was shocked. She couldn’t imagine either of her mothers ever letting her. “No, thank you. It’s just, is it safe if you’re driving?”

“Ah,” he grinned. “This amount is fine, it’s just to compliment the food. I’m glad my sister has raised such a careful young woman.”

She felt embarrassed for asking, of course he’d know better than her but Akio didn’t seem to have taken any offence. The conversation continued in small talk. He told her what he did for work and she’d mentioned her affinity for fencing. He’d seemed very interested. Genuinely so too, so she spoke on about it and he kept asking her questions. It was freeing. She didn’t talk too much about fencing at home. She’d settled for her parents just not really understanding it. They both encouraged her to fence and they were adamant about getting her good gear and making sure the school she’d transferred to offered fencing as an extracurricular. They’d always showed up to her tournaments and celebrated her wins with her but whenever she’d tried to really talk about it with them, she was usually met by generic ‘That’s great sweetie’s, especially by Utena. Anthy was a bit better at follow up questions but Akio outdid her by a tenfold making her realise how much she’d needed someone to talk to like this. He wanted to know everything about it and seemed fascinated by every answer she gave. He spoke to her like he was sure he was speaking to someone important, a legend in the making, and it made her feel like she could be. Like maybe one day she’d really reach Juri’s greatness, maybe even surpass her and become the next great fencer. He asked her what inspired her to start fencing and she’d told him about her. “Of course. Arisigawa Juri-san made quite the impact on the fencing scene after she graduated. She must have been the greatest fencer Ohtori Academy has ever seen. The school board and I were very happy to follow her successes.”

“Did you know her?”

The food came in. It appeared she’d ordered a meat stew with carrots, mushrooms and potatoes, decorated with some sort of green garnish and with a side of sliced, toasted bread pieces. She was relieved. She’d seen other tables be served snails and mussels and she’d feared for whatever she might find on her own plate. This looked like something she wouldn’t mind eating and it smelled good.

“Arisugawa-san was a year above my sister and Tenjou-san.” He continued after thanking the waiter. “I was acting Chairman at the time so I was aware of her, I didn’t know her personally but from what I could tell, she was friends with your mother-Tenjou-san,”

She tasted the food as he spoke. It had a rich flavour and the meat fell apart in her mouth. It was really good.

“What were they all like in school? They never tell me anything about it, even when I ask.”

He dipped a piece of bread into the stew, “Well, Arisugawa-san was an exemplary student. High grades in all her classes, fencing team captain and she was also on the student council managing treasury. She was well respected by students and teachers alike and she provided a great example.”

Of course Juri was amazing, she wasn’t surprised to hear it. She’d always been an impossible target to try to live up to.

“What about mom and ma?”

He considered while he chewed. “I’m not so sure I should say.”

Annoyance boiled to her surface, she couldn’t stop it, “You’re just like them then.” She huffed.” “They never tell me anything. I don’t even know how they met. ‘At school’ is all I could get out of them. They won’t even tell me where I come from!”

“That doesn’t sound fair.” He mused.

She realised she was spilling a lot to someone she hadn’t known very long at all. “I’m sorry, we had a fight about that earlier,”

“Don’t be, I’m happy to provide a listening ear. You sound like you need it,” He said it so warmly and his eyes were so kind, she truly felt like she could tell him anything.

“It’s just, they expect me to believe that I’m both their child, like, biologically. That just can’t happen, it’s not possible, don’t they think I know that? I’m not stupid.”

Akio took it all in and only spoke when he was sure she was finished, “Sometimes the absurd lie is easier than a particularly difficult truth.” She couldn’t think of a single scenario that she’d consider difficult enough to keep from her for this long. “You look a lot like my sister.” He smiled when she didn’t speak. It was true. She’d seen people be surprised when finding Anthy wasn’t the one who’d carried her, but she also suspected there was a layer of whatever made people ask her if Utena was like her dad. Something about how it might make her unconventional family look more like theirs.

“I know! And it’s weird because mom-Utena’s the one who had me but, like, if I’m some sort of lab baby, then why don’t they just tell me?”

“That is strange…” He mused. “You’re a lot like her too, you know. She used to be high spirited just like that, I might be tempted to take their word for it.”

She kept eating her food. She didn’t want to hear she was a lot like either of them right now. They were both condescending liars.

“Fine, I’ll tell you about your parents. It only seems fair since they’re keeping you in the dark about so many other things.” She perked up immediately and he continued, “They met during middle school when they’d been assigned roommates. Anthy was an easy target for bullies and she had a hard time with her grades. She relied a lot on my support until she met Tenjou-san who came with her own problems. She also had failing grades in a few classes, she got into more than a couple of fights and she often argued with teachers because she insisted on wearing the boys uniform. I suppose they felt like they were outcasts perhaps and maybe found solace in eachother, they were always very close.”

It was strange to hear this about her parents. She supposed because she knew next to nothing about their youths, she’d just assumed they were perfect students. The boys uniform was perhaps the only thing that didn’t surprise her. Well, that and maybe Anthy being a victim to bullies just like her. Afterall, she’d somehow seen how awful she’d felt at her old school even when she’d tried to hide it.

“I met Tenjou-san when Anthy introduced me to her and the three of us grew very close. We spent almost every day together and it felt like all three of us were like a family.” He smiled distantly. “But we fell out and my sister made it clear she didn’t want to speak to me years ago and I’ve missed them both dearly since. I’m very happy they let me take you out today, perhaps it’s an olive branch.”

She felt bad. He seemed so sad and so hopeful but she’d lied to him.

“They don’t know I’m here…” She said and braced herself. “I didn’t want to talk to them because of our fight so I lied to you. I’m sorry.” He gave her a sad smile.

“I see. Then, if it’s not too much to ask I’d appreciate it if they didn’t know I was here. They don’t want to talk to me and I want to honour that.”

“Are you mad at me?” She asked and he shook his head.

“No. I’m very happy to meet my niece even if my sister wishes nothing to do with me.”

They finished their food and kept talking about inconsequential things. Her uncle paid the waiter and they went back to the car soon after.

“Why did you and my ma fall out?” She dared to ask.

“Conflict of interests.” He said.

“What conflict of interests?” Ran asked before she could stop herself. She worried she’d overstepped but was met by a secretive smile from Akio as he watching the road ensuring her he wasn’t offended.

“Doesn’t seem like the gentlemanly thing to talk about.” She’d already asked more than she should so she accepted this answer and they sat in silence but then he seemed to re-consider, “Do you really want to know, even if it shocks you?”

“Yes.” In fact, it made her want to know even more.

“Very well then, but you can’t relay what you’ve heard back to them, understand? No need upsetting them about something they don’t want to talk about.”

She nodded eagerly and he spoke on.

“Like I said, I was very close with both my sister and Utena-san like I told you before and the two of them were the best of friends.” She noted the change in address. “They graduated from school and we all kept spending time together. Eventually Utena and I fell in love and we started dating.” She looked over at him eyes wide with surprise and he smiled, her shock clearly amusing him.“Things were harmonious for a while between the three of us but I had my suspicions that my sister had eyes for her too. I felt bad for her, of course, I could tell it hurt her that we were together and I hated seeing two best friends drift apart so I tried to arrange for them to spend time without me so perhaps they could reconcile but it turns out this was to my loss and her gain. I never could have foreseen Utena breaking up with me to be with my sister. It hurt but the whole thing was very civil. We agreed to still be friends and I was hoping we’d go back to the way the three of us were but Anthy took to jealousy easily. She couldn’t handle having me around, I suppose in some fear that Utena’s feelings for me would rekindle so I distanced myself and eventually Anthy told me the two of them were moving and didn’t give me an address or phone numbers. I haven’t seen them since,” She was listening so intensely she almost forgot to breathe and what he said next shook her to her core, “That was about fourteen years ago now.” It couldn’t be. “Tell me,” his eyes landed on her while he faced the road, “How old are you?”

“Fourteen,” she mustered through her feeling of choking. Something in her was rattling, she felt like she was shivering from freezing but it was warm inside the vehicle.

“Huh,” was all he said and she knew what he was thinking because she was thinking it too. It all made too much sense. The way they were both so secretive, the way they’d never mentioned him, the way she looked so much like her ma and the way her ma looked so much like her brother…

He let her off by her apartment complex and they said goodbye with polite smiles. He’d gently told her she’s free to reach out to him anytime and she’d thanked him for dinner. She took the elevator up but she didn’t stop at her floor, instead she went to the roof desperate for the cold air on her face and in her lungs as she breathed heavily and paced around. Maybe she hadn’t wanted to know. Maybe it had shocked her. Maybe she shouldn’t have looked through the document drawer. She stayed up there for a long time.

____________________

“Ran still isn’t answering her phone,” Utena paced around the living room, running her hand through the back of her short hair a couple of times. “It’s way past curfew…”

“She’s probably just acting out,” Anthy said from the kitchen as she put the last things into the dishwasher.

“Something could have happened to her!”

“I know, I’m as worried as you are.”

She kept pacing while composing another text message to her daughter. Anthy walked up to her right into her arms. “You’re right, we need to tell her something, her acting out like this scares me…”

“What should we tell her?”

“The truth. Most of it.”

“We’ll do it together.” Utena promised and hugged her a bit tighter.

Anthy sighed. “I just wanted her to have a normal upbringing… Like we couldn’t have.”

“She’s not normal though is she? She’s our kid.”

Anthy let out a small chuckle. “I suppose.” She untangled herself from Utena and looked up at her, “Let’s go find our daughter, I can’t stand this,” She took the car keys from the counter and they made for the door hand in hand.

____________________

Ran prepared mentally for the scolding she’d get the moment she stepped through the door but when she entered her home she was met with silence. She hadn’t been lucky enough that they’d given up waiting for her and gone to bed, their bedroom door remained open and their bed was neatly made as always. They’d no doubt gone out to look for her. They must have been worried… She couldn’t bring herself to feel bad, she was far too unravelled about the revelations she’d had earlier that night to feel much of anything about anything else.

She hadn’t looked at her phone since she’d left and was unsurprised to find about 50 missed calls from her mom along with several texts. ‘Dinner is ready,’ Photo of a curry. ‘We made your favourite!’ ‘Come home before Chuchu eats it all!’ Blurry photo of Chuchu attacking the curry. She would have probably thought it was funny if she wasn’t so tangled up inside. ‘I managed to save some for you!’ Photo of a neatly wrapped box in the fridge with a looming, blurry Chuchu ear in the corner, ‘Curfew soon!’ ‘Getting worried, are you on your way home?’ ‘Do you need us to pick you up?’ ‘Please answer’ ‘Are you okay?’ along with one from her ma, or, she hated to think it… aunt? ‘We’re worried sick, answer your phone. ( =^w^=)” She didn’t answer, instead she added a new contact, chose a girls name in case they’d happen to see it and copied in Akio’s number from the email. Then she got dressed in her pyjamas and put her fingers to the sword decorating her wall. It was a beautiful blade that Juri had given her. She’d told her it had used to be her favourite sword. It helped ground her.

When she lifted her covers, she found Chuchu curled up under them and felt a pang of guilt that he’d worried about her too. She picked him up gently and he stirred half awake. When she put him down by her face on the pillow, he cuddled up to her nose and forehead.

She could hear the door open soon after, followed by their mumbled voices. She was turned to the wall in her bed and just pretended to sleep when she heard her bedroom door open.

“Thank goodness.” Utena whispered and Anthy let out a long sigh. She heard soft footsteps walk towards her and felt a careful weight by her side then a hand brush her hair from her face. She kept her eyes shut and tried to lay as still as possible. They’d no doubt chew her out if they knew she was awake. “I’m so glad you’re home” Utena breathed and kissed the side of her forehead, then pulled her covers up a bit higher as she felt the weight beside her disappear. She heard her walk out of the room and the door close halfway. Thinking she’d won, she dared to turn and look but started. Anthy’s face was still peering into her room smiling at her.

“You’re grounded,” she said, then gently closed the door.

Chapter Text

Six months ago.

It had been an awful day.

Period 1: Get hit in the back of head by pieces of eraser all throughout class.

Period 2: Fail to find a partner for the group assignment and ask the teacher if you can work alone
playing it off as if it was your intention all along.

Lunchtime: Eat outside between the trees by the school alone, then get shoved in the corridor on the way back to class.

Period 3: Fall on the floor as someone pulls the chair from out under you.

Break: Cry in the bathroom.

Period 4: They ran out of erasers, pencils fly instead.

It hadn’t always been like this. The boys had never been nice to her but it hadn’t bothered her because she’d had her best friend, Shun, and they’d never cared what anyone thought of them. They’d been joint by the hip since daycare and he’d felt as close and important to her as her family did.

‘I don’t like you anymore.’ Her best friend had said one day.

‘Why? What did I do?’ She’d asked and he’d shrugged and looked at his feet.

‘I don’t know, I just don’t like you anymore.’

The day she’d heard those words was the first time she’d ever experienced the cutting pain of loss. She’d heard them echo in her head ever since. He and his new group of boys had started to pick on her after that and he’d become the cruellest of them. She’d known it was his way of distancing himself from her to fit in with them. He couldn’t have meant it, not really. Could he? Despite it all, she’d never been able to hate him. She missed him even when he’d called her names. It just wasn’t him, she’d kept thinking. One day he’d realise this wasn’t him and he’d be himself again and he’d come back to her. That day had yet to come.

She sighed outside her apartment and put on an as pleasant expression as she could muster while opening the door. It’d break her parents’ hearts if they knew how they treated her so she didn’t want them to know, didn’t want them to worry.

“I’m home!” She called.

“Hi sweetie!” Utena beamed.

“Hi dear,” Anthy smiled. She found them in the living room trying to assemble a new bookshelf while Chuchu directed them from on top of a cupboard, pointing and ‘chu’ing decisively.

“How was school?” Utena was equally happy to see her every day and it stung. It made her feel like she had to match her cheer when she had none to give.

“Fine but I have homework so…”

“We’ll try not to be too noisy,” Utena replied and promptly screwed a shelf in, making the whole thing rumble like a thunderstorm. Anthy’s eyes fell on her in that particular way, like she was trying to see her bones through her skin and she tried not to look uncomfortable by it.

“Well, good luck,” She left into her room, closed the door, plopped into her bed and proceeded to doomscroll on her phone. It couldn’t have been more than a few minutes later that she heard footsteps by her door so she hastily tore some books up from her backpack and put them on her bed. By the time the soft knocks came, she was sat over them with a pen.

“Come in,” Anthy let herself into her room and sat down by her, peering over her shoulder, “What are you working on?”

She’d opened a up a random book on a random page but she saw DNA strings illustrated on it and formed her lie. “Biology test.”

“Ran,” She felt her ma’s gentle hand her brush her hair behind her ear, “I can tell that you’re not okay.”

A lump formed in her throat. “I’m fine.”

“No you’re not,” She said, fingers still running through her hair. The pressure behind her eyes betrayed her and her vision went blurry.

Her ma gathered her into her arms and she cried into her chest like a child. She let her cry until her tears ran out, then she told her everything and she listened. She’d been pulled out of school and then transferred shortly after.

____________________

Ran braced herself as she walked into the kitchen and found her mom packing lunches. She watched her for a moment just move about the counters and drawers quickly and routinely, almost gracefully like a well rehearsed dance. Her mom who’d carried her on her shoulders and who’d never turned her down when she’d asked to play and who got especially excited if said play involved a ball. She’d read her bed time stories and braided her hair and she’d always told her, ‘Ran, even if we’re mad at each other sometimes, you are always my treasure and that will never change no matter what,’ and she’d believed her because they’d fought but they’d always made up and she’d never held a grudge. She’d always felt like she knew her in and out but she looked so different to her now. She’d had failing grades and got into fights and argued with teachers and dated a man. She almost felt like a stranger. Did she ever really know her at all? And yet here she was, swinging around in the kitchen just the same as always.

“Oh! Goodmorning, Ran!” She said when the sight of her drew her back to reality from whatever thoughts she’d been lost in as she went about her routines, “Where were you last night? You had us worried.”

“A friend’s house.” She grabbed the bagged lunch on the kitchen table where Utena always left it for her.

“And what friend is that?”

“Airi,” she lied.

“Well, I’m glad you’re making friends but remember your curfew next time,” Her watch seemed to give her a start and she started to make her way out of the kitchen, “And answer your phone! Good luck at the sports tournament today, sweetie! Gotta run!” She stuck her head into her bedroom as she passed through the hallway, “Goodbye gorge!”

“Bye love,” the bedroom answered and she was gone.

Utena liked to cycle to work, she was a part time PE-teacher and part time consultant for a few different schools not too far away. From what Ran had gathered she managed anti-bullying and children’s safety programs.

Ran made her own way to put her shoes on and Anthy appeared from the bedroom dressed in her blue scrubs. Her other mother, if that’s who she was, worked at a vet clinic further away so she had first claim at the car.

“Ready to go?” Anthy asked while she took her coat on. Ran couldn’t look her in the eye.

“Yes.”

She got into the front seat next to her and scooted it forward a bit to make up for the previous passengers’ longer legs. The ride brought back memories from the night before where she’d also been seated front, next to someone who also had green eyes, dusky skin and purple hair. She caught a couple of glimpses of her while she focused on her driving. She looked so much like him yet nothing like him at all. Where he had a strong jawline and a long face, Anthy had rounded features and where he towered, Anthy was so small she had to sit with the wheel at her chin to reach the pedals. That’s why she usually drove. It was a hassle for them to keep readjusting the seat and the mirrors every time, besides, she seemed to like it. So did he.

“We were really worried about you yesterday,” She said and Ran leaned on the window, she’d already had this conversation. “You know, if you ever need to get out of some situation you’d rather not us know about, I’ll pick you up no questions asked. I can even fake an emergency call, just text.”

“I know,” She’d been told this many times, she didn’t need the reminder. Especially not from her aunt who’d apparently been so jealous she’d disowned her brother and stolen his child. She was disappointed in her, even more than she was angry. She’d often felt like Anthy understood her the best and she’d thought of her as the kindest person she knew because she was kind to her and to her mom and to every little creature she came by. Every rain trapped worm and every garden pest snail was precious to her. She’d stopped her from stepping on ants when she was a child and taught her that bees won’t harm you if you don’t harm them. How could someone who is this kind to bugs be so cruel to her own brother?

“Your mom and I want to talk to you about something after school today,” She said as they rolled into a stop at the bustling parking lot full of other cars also doing drop offs and a sea of other students trying to find their meeting places. “We’ll pick you up and then we thought we’d go to a nice park a little away. We’ve heard they have a good waffle stand there… We’ll park a bit away, you know, like you asked us to,” There was no secret scorn in her voice that she could detect, only gentleness, which didn’t make her less suspicious.

“Okay,”

“You’re not in trouble, I promise.” But she wasn’t quite sure she wasn’t in trouble. Could be a trap about her low grades in math or running away from home last night. No way they’d tell her Anthy was really her aunt and her whole upbringing was a lie when they’d told her just yesterday that she was too young to know that, would they?

“What do you want to talk about?” She tried but Anthy shook her head.

“Later. Now go or you’ll be late.”

____________________

They’d been seated in a rickety baseball court which had been makeshift fashioned into different areas with things put out for different sports. She could see what looked like a makeshift piste further away.

“Welcome to this years Annual Sports Tournament Day!” A teacher from some other school called into a microphone then gave them a rundown for the day’s schedule as well as rules and emergency exits. She hadn’t lied to her mom earlier, there really was an Airi. She was seated next to her and she was something like a friend. Friendly, at the very least. She’d been the one to show her around the first week and she’d go out of her way to talk to her every day.

“I can’t wait to see you fence! I bet you’re really good!” She whispered. Her kindness always surprised her. “I’m on track but I’m honestly not very fast, so cheer for me, okay?” Ran nodded, of course she would and she imagined most of their classmates would as well, Airi seemed so well liked by all of them.

“We are also excited to announce that we have a last minute entry!” The teacher announced and raised her hand to one side of the court as she called the school’s name but Ran could only hear ringing in her ears as the students rose from their seats and waved frantically. She could make out her old tormentors. All of them and she could see Shun. Something clenched in her chest and she couldn’t breathe. As soon as the first tournament, high jump, started and the chosen contestants rose to make their way down to the court, she followed the movement and got up, she had to get out of there.

“Where are you going, Ran?” Airi asked.

“Bathroom.” She managed and snuck out.

She spent the next however long hiding under the wooden bleachers.

“There you are! I’ve looked everywhere for you!” She heard Airi say and peered up at her from where she’d been sitting with her forehead leaned on her knees. She held her fencing gear and sword in her hands and Ran only realised then that she’d left all her stuff next to her. “It’s almost time for fencing. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Ran said on instinct and got up.

“Are you sure?” Airi tilted her head. “You don’t look fine.”

“It’s nothing, it’s just… My old school is here and it’s hard to see them again.”

“Oh, I see.”

They heard the speakers call for all fencers to gather. Ran grabbed her gear from Airi and hastily put it on.

“We can tell them you’re not feeling well,” Airi suggested. “I can do it for you if you want-“

“No, I want to fence.” Ran said and took her sword.

She entered the piste just on time and found herself face to face with Shun as he put his helmet on. His eyes landed on her for a brief moment before they were covered by the net and her breath hitched. If only she still had him, then maybe the whole thing with her parents wouldn’t feel so heavy. She’d talk to him like she always had and he’d make dumb jokes to until she felt better.

“En garde! Prêts? ALLEZ!” The teacher acting referee called.

Ran barely managed her preparation by Shun making a long attack immediately, the big lounge forcing her back into her zone. He then mercilessly slashed while quickly pressing on, chasing her right off the court. Point to Shun. She could hear him snicker while his friends hollered. He’d surprised her. ‘Let no one intimidate you.’ She heard Juri’s voice in her head from one of the countless times she’d sparred with her in that park near her apartment. She’d made a similar long attack at her and she’d fallen backwards in surprise. She’d helped her up, held onto her hand locked her fierce eyes in hers. ‘You are scarier than your opponent, don’t let them believe otherwise. Again!’

“ALLEZ!”

She watched and he attempted the same preparation again, big lounge, long attack. She made a quick side-step and tapped his back. Point to Ran. He’d still snickered, though a bit quieter.

“ALLEZ!”

He attacked and she made a parry and riposte, point to Ran. He’d scoffed.

“ALLEZ!”

Next she’d forced him back again into his side of the court, earning her priority when they touched at the same time. Point to Ran. He’d swung his sword back and forth while getting back into place.

“ALLEZ!”

They each leapt forward and sword met sword. She caught his eye through the netting and for a brief, painfully familiar moment his golden eyes met hers.

Shun had had a tree house. He and Ran had played in it almost every day. The canopy had felt like a whole world to them where they could make believe anything. One time she'd climbed and the branch she'd held onto had snapped. She'd managed to catch herself before she fell but at the cost of her palm which she'd cut on the wood. Shun had patched up her injuries best he could. She'd been furious at her ma for removing his handiwork to clean the wound and re-bandaid it properly no matter how many times she'd explained it could get infected. Her palm felt like it throbbed now as she hesitated and he jabbed at her chest. Point to Shun. ‘Never hesitate. Again!’

“ALLEZ!”

He took two big steps forward and so did she. He attempted an attack and she parried but didn’t manage a riposte before he jabbed again, forcing her to block and retreat backwards losing advantage. ‘Play with your opponents expectations.’ Juri had said in another one of their sparring sessions. ’Only let them predict you when their prediction is to their detriment.’ She held her sword straight, forcing his hand back in search and she jabbed at his chest letting him block and retreated backwards avoiding a riposte, jabbed again and retreated once more. Then she moved to jab again but continued past him and flung her sword forcefully behind him so that it whiplashed and touched his back. Risky move. Point to Ran.

“ALLEZ!”

Last match. He aimed an attack so low his sword slapped the floor. It didn’t look like an accident. Whatever trap he’d planned failed as she easily touched his back again. Point to Ran.

The referee held her hand up in her victory and her new classmates cheered. Shun shook her hand out of obligation and he didn’t speak so she didn’t either though she wished he’d said something. Then he let her get off the piste first and she took one step then fell on her face, his foot standing heavily on her undone shoelace. His trap had worked after all. Her tormentors broke out in loud laughter that the teacher acting referee couldn’t quiet and he had the audacity smile and say, “Oops.”

Something snapped inside her. She felt angry. So very angry. She was angry at her mom for lying to her. She was angry at Anthy for not being her real ma and for making sure she never met her father. She was angry at her old class for laughing at her and she was angry at Shun. She was so, so angry at Shun. She gathered herself from the ground and shot up at him in a hard tackle and she didn’t stop going after him even when someone grabbed her arms and restrained her.

She was put in one of the teachers’ cars and taken to her empty home-room shortly after. She’d been told they’d call her parents. She didn’t want to see her ‘parents’ so the only thing left to do when she was left alone while the teacher made the call was to climb out the window. Second floor with a patch of grass underneath would not be that bad. Sitting wedged between a liar and a home wrecker while they and the principal scolded her would’ve been worse.

____________________

“Anthy?” Utena stood up from the chair where she’d been asked to wait.

“Must be bad if they called us both here,” Anthy furrowed her eyebrows.

Utena had been firm on her being contacted for everything relating to Ran’s schooling as she was the most easily accessible out of the two of them and because she had a hand in most schools around town. She did, however, have a reputation for not backing down easily in any disagreement so they no doubt invited Anthy too to be a peacekeeper. They probably took her for someone who’s gentle and calm and who might soothe her partner’s argumentative spirit and tell them things like ‘we’ll talk to her’ or ‘sorry to inconvenience you’ and they’d be so very wrong.

“Have they said anything to you?” She was still dressed in her scrubs and she’d forgotten her stethoscope around her neck. She must have left in a hurry.

“Nothing more than Ran getting into a fight,”

In that moment a teacher walked by them, looked between them and headed into the principals’ office. She poked back out the door again after a few moments. “You’re Tenjou Ran’s parents? Please come in, Ran will be here in a moment.” She left the door open and disappeared back into the corridor herself.

Inside they found the principal and in front of her, six chairs. Three of them already occupied and Utena felt her blood boil at once. The three occupied chairs housed the Hayashis with Shun in the middle, Ran’s former friend. She knew enough to know that he’d become her main bully. On the furthest side of him, his mother, who she’d come to understand had some complex around her son being incapable of doing a wrong thing. At his other side his father, who’d seemed uncomfortable by her and Anthy’s relationship but wouldn’t say it. They’d had dinner with them once and never again.

“What are they doing here?” Utena barked while Anthy calmly sat down on the chair furthest away and put her hands in her lap.

“Please take a seat, Tenjou-san.”

“I will not take a seat. You’ll tell me what’s going on and I’ll decide if it’s worth listening to.”

“Your daughter attacked my son!” The mother cried.

Good. Utena thought. At a closer look, he did seem to be covering up a bleeding nose and she couldn’t help a bit of pride rising in her. “What was Shun doing anywhere close to Ran?”

“Would you please take a seat.”

She relented, plopped down next to Anthy and let her leg bounce as she glared ahead.

“As I’m sure you are aware, today was the Annual Sports Tournament day. Ran went up against Shun in fencing-“

Utena cut her off, “So Ran’s former school was invited to participate on this sports tournament day without our knowledge, that’s what you’re saying?”

The principal seemed to catch her mistake and hesitated on her next words, “…Yes, though they were a very late entry and-“

“Then that is a MASSIVE oversight on your part. You were supposed to let us know well in beforehand if this school ever were to collaborate with yours!” Utena growled. “We were VERY clear about what Ran went through at that school, most of it at the hands of this very student!”

“We’ve kept telling you, Tenjou-san, Shun would never do anything to Ran! They were best friends before she transferred and she’s the one who attacked him! All we’re asking for is an apology. From Ran and from you for your baseless accusations.” His mother stared daggers at her while the son kept his eyes fixed on his shoelaces.

Utena scoffed, “I’m not apologising for me and I’m not apologising on behalf of my daughter either.” She then turned her glare back on the principal. “We had a strict agreement to ensure she never had to see him or anyone else from that school again. This only happened because you failed to upkeep that agreement, the events are therefore not her fault and she shouldn’t have to suffer any consequences for them!”

“She hit my son!” The father argued.

“And your son terrorised my daughter for MONTHS. I’ve worked with boys like him and they’re all the same. Him and his friends are no doubt causing problems for other students now that Ran’s gone and cases like his are always incredibly hard to work on because all those boys have parents like you who chose to put their heads in the sand and think their sons are perfect and never put any effort into raising them and they never will. They’re two steps away from growing up to be adults with no future because they don’t respect anyone else around them so they can only surround themselves with other people like them which in the mild cases leads to them becoming unemployable and in the worst cases, leads to actual crimes. You’re setting him up for failure.”

Both the Hayashi’s went wide eyed and started to argue in raised voices at the same time making it hard to make out anything of whatever denial either of them spewed.

“Settle down!” The principle called and clapped her hands to get their attention until they quieted. Her gaze fell on Anthy.

“Dr Tenjou, you’ve been awfully quiet this whole meeting, do you have anything to add?” Here we go, Utena thought. With her exasperated eyes she might as well have said ‘Dr Tenjou, please put a leash on your wife.’

“Not really.” Anthy said to her visible disappointment.

“Don’t you care that your child assaulted someone?” The father rumbled.

Anthy tilted her head and looked above him with a delighted smile “How did you get in here?”

Shun followed her gaze then let out a yelp and jumped away from his chair followed by his shrieking mother.

“What is it?” The father fretted.

“You have a giant grasshopper on your head!” The mother cried and he got up immediately and started to jump about like a spooked horse trying to get it off. It hopped onto the principal’s table and she flung herself back on instinct accidentally opening up a drawer from which more grasshoppers jumped out. Utena quirked an eyebrow at Anthy who innocently and, though only Utena could tell, gleefully observed the chaos.

Eventually they all ran out, followed by Utena and Anthy walking calmly. Shun’s father anxiously running hands through his hair and checking all around himself. The principal closed the door behind them and took a few deep breaths.

“Where is Ran?” Utena asked.

“I don’t know, she was supposed to be brought here by now.”

“I want them,” She made a wide gesture at the Hayashis “,out of here before she comes.”

In that moment the same teacher as before made her return with a stressed look on her face. “I can’t find Tenjou Ran anywhere.” Utena and Anthy looked at eachother.

The principal sighed, “Meeting dismissed.”

“We will talk more about this.” Utena pointed and glared, then turned on her heel.

“Please call if Ran turns up. Thank you for the meeting.” Anthy said seeming pleased with herself and they left through the main gate hand in hand.

“Am I allowed to say I’m glad Ran beat him up?”

Anthy squeezed her hand and smiled, “Only to me,”

“Those were your grasshoppers, weren’t they?”

“Was it a bit much?” Though there was no trace of remorse in her eyes whatsoever.

“No, that was perfect, Dr Tenjou.”

____________________

Ran felt the wind whip through her hair and watched as the glittering sea passed next to them.

“Where are we going?” His soft voice asked.

“Anywhere,”

She leaned on the door feeling slightly guilty that she’d made him come pick her up but if he minded, he did a good job of not showing it.

“You can talk to me, you know, if you’d like.” His voice was so gentle, it made her struggle even more against that rock in her throat.

“I got into a fight today.” She said, ”This boy, Shun, he used to be my friend but then he changed… I don’t know, he tripped me and I was just so angry so I tackled him back and then I couldn’t stop.”

To her surprise he grinned. ”Your mother’s daughter then.”

”I don’t want to be like her.”

”Who do you want to be like?”

Juri, she thought but didn’t say it. She couldn’t imagine anyone picking on her and she also couldn’t imagine her losing her temper.

“It sounds like that boy had it coming.” Akio said when she didn’t say anything. “I think it’s a good thing to have a fighting spirit. We should always stand up for ourselves.”

“I don’t have a fighting spirit. I ran away.” She wished she could be whoever he thought she was. She’d never stood up for herself once at her old school.

“Oh?”

“I was supposed to talk to the principal and my parents and Shun and his parents but I climbed out the window.” What she thought was a pathetic tale of cowardice earned her a laugh. She felt warm inside and couldn’t help some laughter escaping her too.

“So you beat a guy up and then escaped through the window?” he chuckled.

“Yeah,” she snickered.

“That’s the best thing I’ve heard today,” She smiled to herself. She could hold on to Akio finding her amusing through whatever scolding her mom and Anthy would put her through later. Something gnawed at her though as she watched his remaining grin.

“Akio-san… Are you my-“ but she stopped herself. What if she had it all wrong.

“Am I your-?” He prompted, those kind green eyes falling on her.

“Are you my father?” She continued quietly and Akio gave her a small grin, turning his eyes back on the road.

“I’ve been thinking about our conversation yesterday too.” He said slowly. “I think it’s quite possible… It’s more possible than the two of them having you, don’t you think?”

She looked at her hands in her lap, “I suppose so… What happens now?”

“It’s up to you.” He said simply. “Continue living as you always have with your mother and your aunt or… Let me be your father.” He smiled to himself and she thought he almost looked bashful. “For what its worth, I’d be very honoured to have such a brilliant and beautiful daughter like you.”

She could have had a worse father, she thought. She could have had a father who’d died or who wanted nothing to do with her… But she had a father who was kind and gentle and picked her up in his car when she was upset and listened to her talk about fencing and thought she was smart and funny and brilliant.

“I want to know more about you.” She said and he grinned.

“Do you want to see where I work?”

____________________

Ran hadn’t answered her phone no matter how many times Utena had tried in the passenger seat. Again. This pattern of behaviour was concerning.

“So much of Ran disappearing this week.” Her wife sighed as Anthy put the key in the door to their home. “Do you have any of those wild life tracking devices at your vet clinic?”

“No, but bring her in and we’ll at least get her microchipped.” She said and it made Utena chuckle. She’d never tire of making Utena smile.

“Ran?” Utena called to no answer when she stepped through the threshold. She brushed her shoes off on the door mat and went to check Ran’s room while Anthy stayed behind. She’d spotted a single letter on the floor. She crouched down to pick it up, flipped it over and dropped it immediately as though it had scorched her, she heard her heart pound in her ears.

The letter had no address or sender, only a wax seal stamped with the rose insignia.

“Utena,” She called unsteadily and her wife returned to her with big questioning eyes. Her shaking hands picked the letter up again and Utena went pale at the sight of it. She stood up and shakily tore it open.

Inside they found a postcard featuring the dreadful white towers of Ohtori Academy against a summery, way too perfect, blue sky. It had only one sentence written on the back.

‘Ran sends her regards.’

“He took her.” Utena said quietly in disbelief beside her. “He took our daughter.”

Anthy stared at the postcard without really seeing it. For a moment she felt so familiarly, dreadfully empty. She should have known he wouldn’t leave them alone. That he was just biding his time all along. Walking out hadn’t been enough. Perhaps she should have killed him. Perhaps she should have buried him in the earth’s core and let him burn for eternity.

She returned to reality at the sound of Utena’s breath hitching. She found her pacing around in the hallway, eyes staring straight ahead as they welled up and she sounded like she was about to start hyperventilating but she steadied herself and made her hands into fists. “I’m going to Ohtori and I’m getting her back. You don’t have to come with me.”

As if she’d ever let her go back that place alone. She stepped up close to her and looked into her wet eyes. “We go together.” She took one of her fists and it melted into her hand. “Come on,” she said and lead them out the door, back into the elevator.

The elevator took them down and they stood, eyes fixed into each other’s, hands in hands.

Anthy reached up to wipe a stray tear away from her partner’s eye.

“We’ll get her back,” she reassured fiercely. Something felt like it burned inside her, “No one takes our daughter.”

The elevator continued past the last floor.

“And he will pay for this,” She added.

“He will pay.” Utena agreed.

The light in the elevator started to flicker as they looked into each others eyes. They leaned in, lips meeting lips and the lights went out completely, leaving them in absolute darkness. The elevator plunged down faster and faster. She felt Utena separate from her, her hand slipping out of hers.

The elevator stopped. When the lights came back on, it was no longer from the ceiling but from spotlights high above. The elevator was gone and she found herself surrounded by a vast darkness with only a speck of light in one direction. In front of her stood a massive, pink race car.

She heard a beeping noise and saw a red dot light up in the distance in front of them, followed by another one and she quickly got into the car and turned the key already in its’ place. Utena’s headlights turned on and and her engine roared. The next two lights lit up, followed by a loud signal as all lights turned off and Anthy stepped hard on the accelerator sending them away with a force that pushed her hard into the back rest.

“To hell and back,” She said as she pressed the pedal down as far as it’d go and Utena’s headlights seemed to glow fiercer as they rode on in the darkness.