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I Will Always Be That Boy, Scowling At The World, Smiling For The Girl

Summary:

Vax, a reserved EMT used to keeping to himself and shutting out the world around him, barely notices his neighbours - until the day she moves in across the street. Drawn to her warmth but paralysed by his own reluctance, he battles to overcome whatever is preventing him from getting to know her, and slowly opens his heart to the possibility of love that could finally release his heart from where he has locked it away to keep it safe.

Notes:

Hello!

This is my first ever fanfic! I haven't written anything since high school, but have been inspired by some excellent works here, so I hope someone finds this as enjoyable as I have found other works. I apologise that getting to grips with AO3 may take me a while.

This story was inspired, in part, by the song Be Your Boy by Josh Pyke. Other songs have inspired other aspects of the story and I will share songs with chapters.

As a Brit, I am trying to keep my work consistently in British English, however, as I live in the US, some American English may slip through the cracks.

Lastly, if you're here - thanks for giving this story a shot!

Chapter Text

 After a particularly gruelling night shift, Vax'ildan was ready to shower and pass out for 8 hours... until his stomach grumbled, at which point he decided he should probably eat something before heading to bed.

The life of an EMT was rewarding but sometimes unforgiving. He had to deal with a wide variety of people, with a wide variety of conditions, remaining level headed and calm through everything. Vax was drained.

The commute always helped him to decompress. He could take off the confident face he had to put on for patients. He could begin to let go of the weight of responsibility that sat on his shoulders for the entire shift. He didn't have to carefully pick any words of reassurance or think about how best to speak in a situation to keep situations under control and people at ease. He didn't have to school his facial expressions to fit the tone of the situation. He could just turn his brain off, put on some quiet music in the background, and allow himself to drive home by muscle memory.

As he turned onto his street in the Central District of Emon, signalling the end of his drive home, he saw the car of his sister, Vex'ahlia, in his driveway.

"Twin's Intuition" is what his mother had called it, and by all accounts, Vax believed it to be a real thing. It seemed to have been proven to him and Vex time and time again. One twin tended to be able to tell how the other was feeling, even when they weren't nearby. They seemed to sense the needs of the other, or they at least just knew their habits, what made them tick, and how they did or did not take care of themselves in certain situations and circumstances.

So, there Vex was, waiting in his driveway with a bag labelled "The Arcandor". That meant breakfast from their favourite coffee shop. A blessing.

As Vax parked in the driveway of his small house, turned the car engine off and removed the keys from the ignition, Vex began walking toward him, waving the breakfast bag around as if trying to waft the smell of his favourite food through the crisp spring morning air.

"Ah, Stubby, my favourite twin," Vax began, in an exhausted tone, before making a concentrated effort to turn it earnest, "thank you for breakfast."

"No problem, brother, but as your only twin, I must say I'm a little disappointed with my title. It seems somewhat... unbecoming for a lady of my stature." Vex quipped.

"Well, Velora made me a really cute friendship bracelet last week, so you can't be the favourite sister, can you?" Said Vax.

"Fair. She's my favourite sibling too. Anyway, have you seen that?" Vex asked, jamming her thumb over her shoulder in the direction of the house across the street.

Ah. A 'for sale' sign, recently covered with a 'sold' sticker. It must have happened as soon as the realtor opened this morning, it wasn't there last night when he left for work.

"Oh, fuck me. A new neighbour is the last thing I need. The last one was so creepy" Vax groaned.

It was true, the last neighbour had been a little creepy. It was a 68 year old woman that had taken quite a liking to Vax, in a way that most people would agree was somewhat inappropriate.

"Oh, you didn't like Ms. Rotherham tracking your schedule and doing her best at being outside whenever you were? She seemed like a very perceptive woman and an excellent timekeeper to me. You should have taken her offer up on dinner and a date. Her flirting techniques were top notch." Vex said flatly.

"Well she isn't exactly my type. I was still very polite to her, I even had tea with her occasionally! I just wished she wouldn't be so... feely." Vax replied, making gentle grabbing motions with his hands.

"She was just lonely; I think physical touch was her way of showing she cared, albeit a way of showing she cared that was uncomfortable for everyone else involved. But lucky for you, she found a man her own age to wine and dine, she moved on, and now look - the opportunity for a new neighbour. Thrilling. Exciting. Utterly..."

Vax cut her off "Mortifying. Who knows what they will be like."

"Well, keep scowling like that and I doubt they will bother you. Don't speak to them and they will have no inkling of your charm - you never should have introduced yourself to Ms. Rotherham." Vex said dryly.

"I don't scowl." Vax said. Vex inclined her head toward the car window in response. Vax looked at his expression in the reflection and found that he was, in fact, scowling. "I rescind the remark. But you know how it is, I spend all of my work day wearing a mask for other people. I just let that fall and my face does what it wants when I'm at home. Anyway, you'd scowl too when you had a neighbour constantly trying to be near you whenever you stepped foot out your door, and if someone else started stealing your mail. I don't even get good mail!"

"You mean your correspondence with the insurance companies trying to get you to buy their car coverage isn't a marvel to behold? How strange. Anyway, brother, take your breakfast - the coffee is decaff - shower and go to bed. You look like shit" Vex stated, and with that, she climbed in her car.

"Thanks Stubby, love you too!" Vax shouted to her retreating car.

And with that, he took a large bite of his ham and cheese croissant, entering his house. He looked at himself in the mirror that hung above the key box in his entryway, and examined his features. His eyes did look tired, his scowl had remained, and his long hair had begun falling out of its hair tie. He tucked the errant strands behind his pointed, half elven ears, and turned to the stairs. He finished his croissant while walking up the steps, and threw the wrapper in the trash can in the bathroom, taking mental note to empty that when he awoke. He took a couple more minutes to drain his coffee before undressing, letting his hair out of the confines of the hair tie, and stepping into the shower to wash the night's work away. After drying and clothing himself, he brushed and braided his hair before falling into bed to sleep off the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach, brought on by the thought of what kind of person the new neighbour joining the street would be.

 


 

 A month later, moving trucks appeared. Vax tried not to be the nosy neighbour, like Mr. Featherthrow down the street, but his curiosity had gotten the better of him. He resigned himself to the thought that it was best to at least get a gauge on the new neighbour as soon as he could. So here he was, back to the wall, craning his neck to peek over his shoulder through the gap in the side of the blinds in his living room.

The street he lived on was interesting; once a road of nothing but starter homes for young couples and small families, when Emon was trying to attract more people to the area beyond those that lived in the affluent Cloudtop District. The council decided that the city very much needed what they would classify as 'regular, working class people' to work and live in the city, to help grow and sustain the economy. The starter homes had eventually also become retirement homes where older individuals moved to when they downsized, so the street was a real mix of generations and experiences.

So, as it was, Vax's street was all small, detached houses and cottages. One bedroom, or two for the slightly larger houses. As much as he and his twin loved each other and living together, they had decided about a year and a half ago that they should try living separately. They were getting to the point in their lives where they had to build their own lives, without their sibling breathing down their neck. Vex had chosen a small apartment, somewhere a little further out of the city so that she could step out of the building's door straight onto a hiking trail. She loved nature and she doted on her Bernese mountain dog, Trinket, as if he were her actual baby. She wanted the trails for him more than herself.

Vax had always been a bit more comfortable in the city compared to Vex, so had chosen a locale a bit more central. This also helped with his commute, and meant that a lot of the places he wanted to go in the city were within a walkable distance, which suited him very well. He had saved up enough money to put a deposit down on one of the small, one bedroom starter homes. He didn't share a hallway or walls with anyone, and that's how he liked it. Peaceful. He even had a small yard where he would occasionally fall asleep after a long shift if the weather was favourable.

The house currently being moved into was closer to a cottage aesthetic than his house. Cute. Quaint. Not really his style but who was he to complain. However, the fact that it was a cottage is probably why it had historically appealed to an older crowd.

Out of the corner of his eye, as Vax had bent his neck this way and that to relax the muscles, he noticed a young woman, half elven - like him, by the looks of things, carrying boxes into the cottage. Just from a glance at her, he saw that she was not at all what he would have expected for the look of the place. Her hair was bright, a vibrant natural red that bounced behind her as she walked. A stark contrast to his very dark brown, almost black, hair. At least they had the slightly pointed ears in common.

As the woman emerged from the door, box deposited safely in the house, Vax got a better look at her. Pale skin, strikingly expressive eyes and a smattering of freckles. All he could think about was how having a new neighbour may not be so bad after all. The looming dread and discomfort he had felt of having yet another weird busy body of a neighbour, frequently in his business, melted away.

Satisfied with what he had found out (which, admittedly, wasn't much), Vax abandoned the window, leaving the blinds alone to continue their usual purpose of blocking the outside world out of his world, and of keeping his world to himself, no longer a shield for his snooping.

 


 

 Roughly a week after Vax's neighbour moved in, Vex and Trinket were visiting, with the three of them playing with a tennis ball in the front yard. It had very much become a game of 'piggy in the middle', with Trinket as the piggy.

Vax had just finished work for the week, giving him a nice couple of days off before he started his EMT day shift. He had woken up earlier than he usually would after a night shift, given that it had been his final of the week. As was tradition for them, the twins would have dinner together, properly, once a week. While they actually ended up having dinner together a lot more than that, this one was always planned. An evening always blocked off for them to drop whatever they were doing, and to never make other plans. It was twin time, and this week, it was Vax's turn to host. He had cooked a simple dinner of homemade mac and cheese - nothing fancy, but using extra mature cheddar and a small amount of mustard powder, the flavours of the dish were elevated, so it was always a twin comfort food favourite. Vex picked up garlic bread to accompany it on her way over.

So here they were, satisfactorily full, playing with Trinket in the front yard. It was pretty easy for them to keep this game going without much thought. They were both incredibly dexterous with amazing hand-eye coordination, meaning they could very easily talk while playing, and they could wear Trinket our quite easily since they had him sprinting back and forth trying to get the ball. Occasionally, they let him have it.

"The park's new activity timetable starts next week. I'm not sure you will be interested in any of the activities, but you should stop by at least for a little bit." Vex said as she continued to throw the ball over a panting Trinket's head.

"Is that when your archery classes are starting? I hope they're paying you extra for running them." Vax replied, returning the ball to Vex.

"A little bit extra, but you know I'm not in it for the money. I love what I do, being a park ranger is a literal dream. Anyway, if anyone understands not being in a job for the money, it should be you." She replied pointedly.

"That's true, I know. I do what I do to help people. However, I also have bills, so jobs do need to pay at least something, Vex'ahlia."

"I know that, Vax'ildan, thank you. I make enough money for my needs, don't worry. And if that ever changes, you will be the first to know."

"When you turn up on my doorstep with my nephew looking for a place to live, I'm guessing?"

"Exactly, brother."

They continued their chatter and ball game a little while longer. The day was wearing on and dusk was beginning to settle. The street was very quiet, so they were a little startled by the sound of a car driving down the street. Vex paid it no mind but Vax kept his eye on the vehicle, watching it park in the driveway of the cottage across the street.

His new neighbour emerged from the driver's seat. He watched her, respectfully, he might add, as she grabbed her bag from the passenger seat of the car. As she straightened up and closed the door, she tossed her hair out of her face and over her shoulder. Her hair caught the setting sun and looked as though it were on fire, different hues of orange, yellow and gold seemed to emerge within it and cast a glow around her face, lighting up her eyes. She dropped her keys of the floor, and reached down to pick them up. As she did so, she seemed to notice the twins out of the corner of her eye, and she smiled at them. A little sheepishly, but something about it was endearing. Beautiful.

She walked up the short path, unlocked the front door and entered the house.

"Oi!" Vex shouted as Vax felt a wet tennis ball hit him squarely in the cheek.

"What in the absolute fuck was that for? That was fucking disgusting!" Vax protested as he used his sleeve to wipe Trinket's slobber from his cheek.

"Sorry, we lost you for a moment there, and the ball slipped out of my hand. You are easily distracted by pretty things, brother. Maybe you should pay a bit more attention to what is going on, instead of staring at your neighbour. Looks like you're the creep now." Vex replied, somewhat waspishly.

Staring? Him? At a neighbour? Absolutely not. He would never. It was more like a one second glance in her direction.

"I wasn't staring!" Is all he could muster in response. "Agree to disagree on that one. So, do you know her? Have you spoken to her? Do you know her schedule?" Vex asked.

"Hey, don't make me out to be a Ms. Rotherham type! But no, I've not spoken to her, this is actually the first time I've seen her since she moved in. She's a good neighbour in that she's quiet and keeps to herself, as far as I can tell." Vax answered.

"Hm, a good neighbour indeed. I wonder if Pike knows her - it looks like she was wearing scrubs," Vex wondered aloud, "Maybe I'll ask her. We should at least have an idea of who you're staring at if we have a mutual connection."

"For the love of the Matron, Stubby, I was not staring!" With that, Vax gave Trinket a kiss on the head and retreated into his house, closely followed by a curious Vex and a thoroughly worn out Trinket.

Later that night, after Vex had left, Vax had gone through the motions of getting ready for bed. He climbed under his bedsheets and sunk into the mattress, pillows and blankets. Maybe he would ask Pike if she knew who this woman was. She was a doctor, she probably had a lot more knowledge of medical staff at the hospital than Vax did. Surely she would know. But why was Vax thinking this? Probably just neighbourly curiosity. Maybe it's just good to have an idea of who you are living near.

He closed his eyes to sleep, but all he could see was bright, burning sunlight, and a woman with a fiery halo of red hair filling his vision.

Crap. He had been staring.