Work Text:
Long distance is hard, even for a couple together for 7 years, 3 of which apart, there are always difficult days. Times when coming back to turn on the lights in a dark apartment did nothing to make a house feel like home. Times when a comfy bed wasn’t enough to supplement an empty one. Times when having even a comedy movie on didn’t substitute the lack of laughter in the room. Days when photos of the park they used to frequent or when the neighbors dog peeking from the balcony weren’t the same as seeing it first hand. Days when hearing each other’s voice and staring at an icon on the phone weren’t the same as seeing the way the other’s mouth moved to enunciate the words. Days when pixels through a video call on a computer screen just aren't the same, just isn’t enough.
Not being able to breathe the same air as you, not smelling the same smells as you, not experiencing time right by your side was just unbearable.
It was a sentiment that Jeonghan and Seungcheol shared during their time apart. Some days were easier than others, whether that be because work got to them first before loneliness or friends had distracted their aching hearts, or they felt satisfied enough to hold on through a short phone call and a photo through text.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
As the one who had moved away, Jeonghan always felt a little guilty. Although he was reassured by his boyfriend that it was good for his career, a big opportunity that he deserved and he’d “be downright bat shit crazy not to take such a job”, he sometimes wonders if traveling all this way was worth it. Don’t get him wrong, he loved his job. It felt like he was made to be a wonderful sales representative and negotiator. There wasn’t a time he could count that a deal didn’t go well for him, an essential pride of the company. So as a way to both fill their own bottom line and reward Jeonghan with extra incentive (a very big increase in salary) they gave him the option of going abroad to Japan to boost their sales in the abroad location.
At first, Jeonghan was elated to be given such an opportunity, but he soon realized that the deal would be for 6 years. At the time, he had been with Seungcheol for 3 and a half years, coming up on 4 soon in May, and he wasn’t sure what distance would do to that relationship. He pondered for a week, intending to maybe decline, before he let it slip one day over dinner.
“..Hannie?” Jeonghan heard in the midst of his thoughts.
“Huh?”
“You alright, love? You keep pushing your food around.” Seungcheol started, concern working its way into each word. “You’ve been off this week. Anything happen?”
Jeonghan hesitated, he felt bad for keeping such a big proposal to himself that could potentially change both of their lives. So with a big sigh he began, “Well, actually, I got an offer at work…” While Seungcheol held his hand, staring lovingly into his eyes with his own doed ones, Jeonghan told every single detail. About what they promised him, how long it would be and where, what he thought about how it would affect his career but also what it could do to their established relationship. How guilty he felt for having kept this from him for so long. Everything.
And after everything, Seungcheol’s reassuring words gave him the most clarity he had gotten in days. “Hannie, if you think you’re ready to take the position, I want you to take it.”
“But-”
“Don’t worry about me, don’t worry about us. We’ll be okay. Sure it’ll be hard in the beginning,” Jeonghan began to sniffle and Seungcheol rubbed his hand gently, lifting one to catch the first stray tear. “But we’ll find a routine. Daily calls, or maybe every other day. Photos, texts, video calls. Maybe I’ll fly out to see you on holidays, or if you get homesick I’ll get you a ticket. Either way, we’ll get through it together. Long distance will go by just like that, I promise.”
They cuddled a lot that night, planning how they would virtually spend time together apart. The next day, Jeonghan went to his boss and agreed, which set his departure date a month later in June. Jeonghan, although still racking his brain at the thought of having to spend time apart, was glad for his boyfriend’s support and reassurance. It gave him the courage to do his very best at the career opportunity of a lifetime.
Soon, really soon if you ask him, it was departure day and they held hands all the way to the airport and inside until Jeonghan’s flight was called. With a tight hug and passionate parting kiss, Jeonghan left Seungcheol physically in South Korea, but carried him in his heart to Japan.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
It had been 3 years since Jeonghan left for Japan. Daily routine had found him pretty quickly. Work, the occasional coffee run at a local cafe run by an elderly couple who praised him endlessly for his japanese, more work, a walk in the park, then home. Usually, most nights he either was caught up at a restaurant with his coworkers drinking and eating, or he went home exhausted and made himself something he had a very low chance of messing up and slept about 2 hours later.
This was one of those nights when sleep seemed impossible. Physically, he was beat. He had secured 5 deals, helped out some of his coworkers with basic paperwork, then got wrapped into going out to another afterwork dinner. So naturally, he should be tired enough to sleep, but his mind had other ideas. I want to talk to him. I just need to hear him.
It was 3:00 am over here, meaning it was the same time over there. He remembered that a couple hours earlier Seungcheol mentioned he was going to sleep early after a long day. Hearing that made him feel even more guilty for even thinking of disturbing his loving boyfriend’s sleep. Although he was able to resist pushing the call button, after 10 minutes of staring at their shared messages, he typed a message.
I miss you cheollie
Miss your voice
And your stupid buff arms
He closed his phone, realistically believing that 3 pings was enough to satiate his own need for contact that hopefully didn’t disturb his boyfriend’s slumber. Not even two minutes later though the phone rang.
Cheollie <3 <3 is calling…
He had never answered the phone so fast before.
“Jagiya?” It was Seungcheol, his baritone voice made more prominent with the effects of sleep. “Hannie? Hello?”
He was so caught up in focusing on the very human he missed he forgot to reply. “Cheol..” he tried to reply, but it came out strained and started to tremble, and before he knew it he broke.
“Oh babe. It’s okay, it’s okay. Shhh.”
They carried on like that for 10 minutes, Jeonghan sniffling in his japanese apartment at 3 am, Seungcheol on the other side, eyes closed but wide awake listening to Jeonghan’s sobs and occasional word jumble.
“No more tears now? Hmm?”
“Yeah… just missed ya.”
“Me too. Felt kinda odd not calling you tonight, but I thought you’d be fine since you had that dinner with your coworkers.”
“Well it’s never the same without you. I guess it just built up, especially with our anniversary coming in four days.”
“Ahh right. You know, I was thinking of a movie night over video call while we enjoy a makeshift candle lit dinner. You said there was a BBQ place near your work? I found one here that’s about an hour or two away. We can both order something and it’ll feel like we’re eating together. How about that?”
Even without seeing his face, Jeonghan heard the prideful grin on Seungcheol’s face, and to be fair, he was also very proud of him for thinking so specially about how to make this work. Seungcheol was always thinking of ways to make their virtual anniversaries special, which made those days easier to swallow for their long distance relationship.
“Hannie? You alright my love? Been quiet for a bit.” Seungcheol inquired.
“Yeah, much better babe. Thank you.” Jeonghan sighed, content with hearing the much anticipated anniversary plan.
“Hey, Hannie. You know how you sing me to sleep sometimes?” Seungcheol asked after a quiet pause.
“Yeah? Would you like one? I feel kinda bad for waking you anyways.” Jeonghan admitted, starting to get comfortable so he could happily sing his lover to sleep.
“Haha, no, no. First of all, I wasn’t disturbed at all, anything to help my angel. Actually, I was thinking, maybe I could sing to you…?” Seungcheol meant it sincerely, although he did let a bit of hesitance slip at the end.
It was true, Jeonghan had the habit of singing Seungcheol to sleep since it helped him sleep faster, but it also made Jeonghan feel pride that he had at least some power over his buff boyfriend. So to be offered the rare chance to hear Seungcheol sing was like an early anniversary gift.
“Hmmm, I’d love that Cheollie. It’s truly a blessing to hear you sing.” Jeonghan said cheekily, with all the weight of his love behind it.
“It’s more of a privilege to help you sleep. Now, get comfy.” Seungcheol began.
“Comfy.” Jeonghan reported, getting settled underneath the weight and warmth of the very blankets that felt uncomfortable just a while ago.
For the next 5 minutes, Seungcheol’s baritone voice smoothly drifted Jeonghan to sleep. It was calm and sweet, a lullaby that instantly melted all his tensions and worries. It filled in the gaps of his loneliness to hear his lover 700 miles away make their distance disappear with just a melody. His voice made it feel like as long as he didn't open his eyes, Seungcheol was right next to him in bed.
After Seungcheol finished the last lines, he quietly whispered, “You asleep Hannie? … I love you, angel.”
“Love you too Cheol. Thank you, love.”
And with a kiss over the phone, the two drifted off to sleep, listening to the breaths of the other slow and the world in their dreams bringing them back together once again.