Archive of Our Own

Her voice,
Her spirit,
Her grasping heart of gold;

Her eyes,
Her stature,
Her leading mastery of self and wisdom;

Her hair,
Her form,
Her ornery chase of the undisputed;

Truly know me not without their names.

“...I don’t get it,” pouted Eris and blew bubbles into the water. Ripples were let loose, inviting all the rose petals to dance a little more. 

I took in a deep breath of the fair scent and blew onto the surface, sending the rising steam into elegant spirals. “It’s my attempt at poetry about my lovely wives,” I explained and carefully watched through her narrowed eyes the gears turn.

“It all fits me,” she breathed across the water, raising an eyebrow. I could see her eyes jump across leaves, dissecting my words for things she was willing to part with.

“Well, uh, you are not wrong. I was more thinking about how strongly you feel about things and remain true to that.” She nodded, seemingly satisfied, before her brow furrowed again. 

“Wait. So you think I’m ornery ? Explain!”

“It means that you are, uhm, strong in mind and body, in a way. I admire that about you,” I explained proudly, pleased to see her cheeks flush even more. She pulled a knee towards her body until it broke the surface, balancing a lone petal to extend some rest.

I continued to enjoy the bath, warming my bones, and my company, taking glimpses from time to time. Though whether or not I had mastered peeking without raising suspicion, she seemed preoccupied with something else anyway. 

She let waves bounce off the tub walls. She ran her hands along her arms. She curled the white strand of hair around a finger. It remained impossible to escape her—not that I ever wanted to.

Enough with the mystery. I thought I had figured her out when she dragged me out of my studies two days ago. When she dozed off on the stairs yesterday, waiting for me. When we sparred today, without her even breaking a sweat. When I prepared a romantic bath with candles and roses. Guess I did not.

I lightly nudged her shoulder and asked, “What’s wrong?” And ran my finger across her shoulders.

“Rudeus,” she paused, “am I getting in the way?” she finally asked and began hugging her knees.

I was taken aback. The painful image of her cut hair crossed through my vision, carried by a red petal. Maybe it was Eris, maybe it was me, but a flinch caused ripples to push the leaf away, and the memory with it. 

That’s right, it’s different now. We have grown. There was a shiver in her voice I could not quite pin down. Was it about strength, even though she still trained daily for a fight that might never come? Even so, one might never be too careful.

“No. I think you are a strong warrior, incredibly so. You even defeated a Sword God and the Fighting God,” I said. I knew this wasn’t a question about our life as a family, or Roxy and Sylphy. No, this had to be related to something recent.

A corner of her mouth raised for a tiny moment, accepting my praise. But she seemed disappointed that I made light of her concern at the same time.

“...that wasn’t just me,” she replied and traced her neck. I was very aware of the phantom keepsake the former Sword God left her, and only her. She would have died then. Was this it? Had she been grappling with a sense of defeat ever since, despite our victory? I wondered about that.

What could I do to help her out? How could I help her shake off that feeling before it changes her? Or was this a mix of things, since she hadn’t been this way for a long time. Or, and a horror filled me, had I missed more signs?

“Why didn’t you take me with you to the Labyrinth?”

“Eh?”

“What?” she pouted.

Hold on. 

Things began to shift around in my head until I made sense of it all. But the gist of it probably came down to bad communication on my part. Roxy and I went dungeon diving, and she felt left out, even though Sylphy also stayed at home. It was just the two of us, meant as an exciting date—

Ooooh.

That explained it; she was jealous. And here I was, ready to atone with an entire Christmas date to take her mind off things.

“Eris,” I leaned over, “would you like to go on an adventure date with me?”

“Really?! I choose where!” 

It was an amazing sight. She suddenly sat on her knees, water chasing down her hair that stuck to her body, and all fired up. I didn’t even notice that my hand had started stroking her belly.

***

Her dash,
Her slash,
Her violent dance;

Truly know that I am a weak man.

“Hmpf!” snorted Eris as leaves of brown soaked in a deep hue of red, left by the brutalized Luster Grizzly pack. It was frightening to think about it, but a single Sword King could easily throw off the ecological balance of any minor city; take Rosenburg for example. For this Sword King, well over twenty Grizzlies were no more than roaring heaps of meat.

The same applied to Treants—she would sense any amount of hostility and attack. Needless to say, no whip nor falling block of ice would even come near her.

Matchless as she was, I could tell she was enjoying herself. Or should I say, she was enjoying herself to a degree. Her face was relaxed and attentive, but also a little bit bored.

In the beginning, she would charge forth and shout out to me so we could fight the way we used to. But she got less and less excited, with each fight being over in seconds. At this point I was little more than a fireball slinging mule, retrieving the tails as proof and the skins to sell. Of course, I made sure to burn the rest.

“Let’s go further south,” She declared and crunched eastward through the snow, dragging her share of hides behind.

“This way is a shortcut,” I said in the right direction and held out my hand to the side like a hitchhiker. 

I had the feeling she was chasing something. But was it a feeling? An object? A scripted event worthy of a retelling? Even if I presumed that Roxy had told her everything, what was outside a Labyrinth and inside Eris’ angle?

At first, I was surprised about the amount of thought she put into our date. But the more we went south, the more I became uncertain about the big idea, and thus of what I could do for her. In retrospect, I should have listened to what I was agreeing to back in the tub.

Spirals of vapor appeared in my vision and Eris grabbed my hand with two firm squeezes. True to a date—and similar to what I did with Roxy—there was little to worry about outside of the immediate, so I could go along with wherever her idea took us. But first—

“As top of the class adventurers, we ought to lead by example and make the most of all those Grizzlies,” I reminded her in a voice that hopefully sounded like a cheerful guide.

Thus, we had an uneventful trip to Rosenburg.

The city itself was unbothered by the passage of yet another decade, save for maybe a couple new houses. It made me excited to meet some old faces and see the same old stores.

Visiting this pivotal place was also nostalgic. And with Eris in tow, worthy of reflection. I couldn’t help but see our little phantoms here and there, sometimes window shopping, sometimes gawking at sizzling brochette, but always smiling, carefree and madly in love. And to my surprise, Eris looked like she too was entertaining some idea or the other. So I decided to play into it.

But before I could invite her for a tour through my old turf she asked me out, “Rudeus, would you mind showing me around after we turn our stuff in?” to which I happily obliged. 

Our first stop was the Adventurer’s Guild, naturally. Whereas its outside strayed not far from my memories, the inside had all the more place for new ones. Tables were renewed and rearranged to make better use of the space, and a new section was added, exhibiting some detailed maps.

Eris and I approached for a better look. “Just… wow,” I let out, riveted by the attention to detail. Not only were crucial areas and points of interests for gathering missions meticulously mapped out, the underground fortress was so too. Someone must have gone through great pains to create this.

“I wish this was available when I first got here. Amazing! Just who did all this?”

Eris squinted and inspected the maps closer. Her interest however did not lay in the corners, where a signature might exist, but in the area around the fortress. She gave up a couple seconds later, clicking her tongue.

While Eris took care of both dumping our surplus goods on the receptionist and glaring at every adventurer, I looked the map over again. For two things in particular: a place she might enjoy visiting and what might have piqued her interest in the fortress.

For the former, I noticed a spot. If I remembered the mission that took place there correctly, it had a fantastic view. That would make for a nice picnic.

For the latter, I looked the fortress over again. At the corner was a dark spot, marking a lonely area that was still unexplored and highly dangerous. That must have been…the abysmal pit? Don’t tell me she wants to dive in there for shits and giggles!?

“Rudeus!”

“Coming~”

I heeled over to Eris at the entrance and gave each face a last glance. At bewildered, strange looks. Like leaves in winter, all the familiar ones must have moved on. 

For the duration of our way to Rosenburg, certain forms of words had built up. Words I wanted to happily share in exchange. I had looked forward to that. And, if I was being honest, a part of me wanted to shake something off in front of those who walked with me. 

Sure, word traveled fast among the Adventurer’s Guilds, so those who cared probably knew all about me. And it wasn’t like I owed anyone. Still, I was just asking for a simple handshake—a sign that I had gotten better. That I had found my mother. Giving back a happy ending to the most invested, who saw too often the other side of things. And maaaybe show off my cool husband in the meantime.

And in return I would receive a glimpse at their life. 

“Don’t worry, Rudeus. No one here looks strong,” Eris picked this moment to get me moving. Yeah, that is what worries me , I thought, presuming that most S-Ranks were out doing missions or liquor.

I would never know. All that was left was to hope that, just like Soldat and Sara, everybody was alive and well.

***

The next morning Eris and I engaged in a jog around the city on one of my old routes. Today’s weather offered uninterrupted sun with a weak bite to the cold air. I took this chance to follow up on my promise to show her around.

And yet the misty clouds of her breath remained as steady as it stayed silent. Her eyes followed my comments about the white roof of a manor, sizing up the mountain of Snow Drakes it must have taken to cover it. I showed her the town square and its marketplace, selling fresh wares and snacks. The taverns, promising her the worst headache of her life. The shops, where she might find a nice pair of undergarments that would go nicely with a rare sword—we found neither, but she found me a nice trouser to ’tear through’. Guided by the mood, I even showed her the Blue Rose Palace—briefly and from a distance.

What was nostalgic for me was ordinary for Eris. “Anything caught your eye?” I asked, hoping for a hint of our next destination or her plan. We stood in silence outside the western gate where I used to do a set of pushups and return to the inn. 

“I still remember that bigmouth from the Conflict Zone,” she said after some time.

“Hoh? Soldat? Look, I don’t think he—” 

She cut me off, “This place got me thinking. How it would be when the three of us were here, back then.”

“I see.” I too had spent some time on those scenarios as well. Similar to now, Ghislaine, Eris and I would have wiped the forest and ended up either in the east or west. But always together.

“I would have fought him the moment we met,” she said and crossed her arms.

"Eh? No no Eris, I think you misunderstand. It would have been different. I even think you two would have a blast hunting.” I replied, earning a scoff.

The deep crunching sound of snow made us stop and listen. Too voluminous was the sound for it to be an approaching predator, too slow for it to be human.

What revealed itself through the bushes was a huge Snow Alpaca, lazily approaching a shed near the wall. And it wasn’t alone. The Alpaca was dragging a body face down through the snow, tied to its neck by a rope. 

Eris gasped. I hurried over to check on the person, one leg sticking out like a stormy strand of hair, barely holding on. I turned them around and found them to be an old man, still breathing. Unconscious, but alive. 

I quickly untied him and began healing the leg. Luckily it was all still there and just needed a spin into the right position, so it didn’t require a scroll I would first need to fetch, if I would spend it in the first place.

The Snow Alpaca, free of any care in the world, stood in the shed, munching whatever was prepared in its food tray. These beasts were a rare sight. Not because they were going extinct or would kill any witnesses, but simply because they could go where you didn’t. They say that Snow Alpacas possess the survival instinct of a burning rug and the perseverance of a mountain. 

Naturally, they were sought after for their fleece as a luxury. The arising problem was that any attempted killings were futile. Adventurers had to approach them without any hostility and shear them during summer, keeping them preoccupied with expensive food. And to add to that, Alpacas were, normally, impossible to tame. Normally. 

So the fact that this Alpaca made every appearance of being a recent addition to the city, this old man must have some impressive tricks up his sleeves. Which he was hopefully willing to share, now that his eyes were flickering open.

“Shitball!” he groaned and flailed about for a bit to get his bearings, suspiciously wagging his leg. He squinted, unsure of what to make out of his situation, and finally recognized me.

“Were you also looking for...” he began, but then spotted the Alpaca in its shed. “But..?” His confusion prompted me to retell their arrival. He in return told me of his last memories, rubbing his leg as he recalled the painful descent of a nearby cliff. His eyes then met mine to say, “Goodness. I’m very grateful for your help, but you should have left me to die… I can never in my life pay you.” 

That shook me a bit. I waved him off, assuring him that it was not an issue. To me and the ones around me, be it friends, family, or other adventurers, one hand washes the other. I often forgot how regular citizens were unable to be part of this exchange, and therefore dependent on the rarity and goodwill of whomever could offer such a commodity—hefty prices and abuse included.

“That’s…! Again, have my thanks. It is good to see that not all younglings be self-serving bastards.” Words so thick with resentment that an awkward silence found its way into our midsts and all I was left with was to contort my face in helpless pain. With that, our conversation ended. Or not.

“You know, my son used to help me with these stubborn pricks,” he started anew. It followed an even more awkward monologue in which I became the much-heralded hostage. Persistent like a shark or Dragon-God, he would take every uninterested uh-huh , or murmured hmmmm as a motivation to go on and on... It was painful. Even worse, I could sympathize with his son being very consumed by the needs of his new found wife.

The old-man startled up. As if only now noticing where he was—or rather, where he was supposed to be—he peered around. “Oh nooo” he wheezed, “Oh no, oh nooo. He is not here!”

At first I presumed he meant his son, courtesy of the pitfalls of old age and other tricks of the mind. But the greybeard cleared that up a second after.

“There wasn’t a second Snow Alpaca around now, was there? About this high?” He asked and gestured on his tiptoes, stretching as high as he could. It was, despite the severity his expression implied, a funny sight, since these Snow Alpacas were about 3 meters in height.

He began to curse for a while after I shook my head. I also started to miss my companion, who had been suspiciously quiet all this time. I found Eris in the shed, her face buried deep in the Alpaca’s curly fleece.

“Eris?”

“Rudeus,” she shouted back from within the fur, “you have to feel this!” She continued to rake her fingers through the fur like an explorer, extremely close yet too far to decipher the constellation of olfactics. I declined, to which I could hear her exhale a response that sounded like a happy, “more for me!”

To my surprise, her eager huffing was easy on the Alpaca’s mind, humming lightly like it was enjoying the affection as a fitting garnish to the food.

“I’m terribly sorry,” began the man, “but could I trouble you something? You are adventurers, are you not?”

“Why yes, we are.”

“Without my Linda—the other Alpaca, you know—I can hardly make this all work. Would you be so kind as to look for her?” He asked with both skepticism and hope written all over his face. As I looked over to Eris and how this could affect her plans, the man continued to sway us. “Ah, did I mention your payment? You could harvest what they find and take as much for yourself as you want. Trust me when I say they fetch a pretty penny. All you have to do is go for a walk with Mathey, he will guide you to his mate.”

From the corner of my eye I saw Eris already throwing a noose around Mathey’s neck. I sighed. She was listening this whole time? Thus, we went back to the inn to get our equipment, picked up Mathey, and were ready to be led to fetch Linda. And how long could this take anyway?

***

Two hours and 4,000 single steps later. 

I was annoyed. 

I was hungry. 

I was cold. 

I had to pee. 

Yes, I had already found a munching Linda by going ahead and circling around the ever-distracted and laid-back Mathey. But, as I had to find out the hard way, this was far from over. Oh no-no! 

It was hard to decide what was worse; Mathey, becoming an immovable object as soon as the leash got either dropped or tugged, or Eris, (presumably) causing these moments to nosedive into his fur. 

Just like her mate, Linda was very fussy when it came to touching. Get close to either her bubble butt or head and she would freeze up and groan at you in annoyance. 

Then there were the objects of desire. When I found Linda, she was eating something high up in the trees, but I could not make out what. I felt pranked, as if this was a trick to lure in unsuspecting predators, but the Alpaca paid me no mind. Furthermore, the wet smacking of her mouth while eating was definitely not an act.

But I found out soon enough when Linda tore at one of the branches and a volley of stone-hard things hailed down on me. The thing was, that there was nothing there—until I checked the ground and saw holes in the ground and picked up what turned out to be fist sized, pellucid fruits.

Since neither Linda nor Mathey were in the mood to be swayed towards the city, Eris and I passed the time by filling our bags with these fruits. One bag for our trouble, one to help out the old man.

And then it happened. Eris stood with Mathey, holding the bag open to collect any falling fruits, when her innocent eyes got captured by the mesmerizing motion of relentless chewing. In one smooth move, she caught a fruit that fell out of Mathey’s muzzle, and put it in her mouth. 

I wish I could have stopped her. But I could not have predicted what came next. Both Alpacas stopped eating and squinted. With blood red eyes they turned to Eris. My blood froze. And as if a devious plan had reached its next stage, they started walking. 

Nah, I’m just pulling your leg. The truth looked a little different. Yes, Eris did do that. No, the Alpacas were unfazed, though they seemed happy to have found someone like-minded. Yes, I had to restrain myself to not blitz over to her and finger that stuff out of her mouth like a badly behaved dog who hid a critter in there.

With glittering eyes she shouted over to me, “Rudeus!” She began between chews, “you have to try this!” Eris fished a fruit out of the bag, cracked it open with one hand, and offered it to me. My eyes moved from the brown nut in her hand to the trail of Alpaca saliva on her cheek. As soon as my face scrunched in order to decline, she shoved the fruit’s core into her mouth. 

She was glowing,
she was humming,
rolling her tongue around, chasing the feast from ever slipping away.

It was an interesting discovery. 

The rest of the day was spent on our journey back to the city. I preferred to call it uneventful, since it only consisted of Mathey humping Linda’s back out of frustration at her slow pace, and a noisily snacking Eris. We handed both animals over to the old man and his dejected looking son. We kept both bags. 

In the near future, a certain magician, driven by his wish to see his wife happy, would close exclusive trading rights and a guarded route to Sharia. It would both secure a steady supply and benefit the family of the old man, including future generations. 

This deal would soon become known as the Macadamia Express, and some years later bloom into a crucial logistics network. But that was a story for another time.

And with that, our date came to a satisfying end—

“Now we go south!” smiled Eris, a bag of macadamia nuts in hand. She marched ahead, motioning for my legs to pick up her pace.

***

“Eris, what are we doing here?” I finally got the point. I was done with beating around the bush. I have cautiously asked her similar questions along the way, each time getting a vague response I was happy to accept. And even though it was about time to go home, I cheerfully went along towards a purpose. It might be hidden to me, but she was clearly in pursuit of an itch. She couldn’t find the words for it, so what? 

I was fine with all of that; happy to help. But this? I had to put my foot down, seeing how things were about to get serious.

“Rudeus. There is something I want to do, and I want you by my side. But if you say we can’t, then we can’t.” We locked eyes, an intense look on her face, as if she was hoping for my blessing. 

What was the purpose ? I asked myself for the umpteenth time and was annoyed that I hadn’t come any closer to the answer than I had at the beginning. I felt like I was in no position to deny her, since I had so much time to figure it out and was still none the wiser.

Sure, I had over two weeks to stop this at any moment and ask outright until I got a clear picture; but I was curious, too. And to be clear, my hunch of where we were heading thickened when we traveled further south from Rosenburg, went through the Red Wyrm’s Upper Jaw, and finally, left the rustling forest behind us to stand in front of a certain unmapped lake.

And again, maybe she needed this more than she let on. I nodded with a buried sigh and her eyes began to sparkle with excitement. She jumped on the stone tablet and waited.

“...do you remember the incantation?” I asked. Her reply was a sharp snort. I had also long forgotten the incantation to lift the illusion and was no help either. Well, I say illusion, but it really is just a solid cliff. Eris tried a true and tested method: pushing with all her might against the wet cold stone. It didn’t budge.

She nodded for me, “Don’t just stand there Rudeus, push!”

“You really want to get in there, don’t you?” I wailed like a beaten sailor and gave it an almost honest attempt, topping it up with heavy groaning. Not my proudest way to support my husband, but it was a cliff we were talking about here.

“...Hmph. Blow it up then,” shrugged Eris, as if this wouldn’t cause us a cascade of trouble regardless of our success. 

“Nah, we can’t do that on the Guild’s turf,” I chuckled and offered her two solutions: forget about it for now, or go to the nearest teleportation circle and ask Orsted for help.

Eris went with option three: climb.

However, it took some vexing back and forth between us to settle on an approach. First, retreat was a no-no. Second, yes, today. Third, it wasn’t that big of a deal to make it this complicated, Rudeus .
In other words, we exchanged opinions and came to the common conclusion that my opinion didn’t matter. We were here, weren’t we?

Yes, it escalated into a small fight. But while it was about the best approach to ascend, I also tested her patience by insisting she not try to jump the entire distance. Or to recite her exact words: I can jump that high! 

Our argument reached a point where I found myself questioning why we were even here in the first place, which only served to make her angrier. Seeing the direction things were heading, I backed off. 

“I’ll start making steps,” I suggested, and to my surprise, she nodded curtly and disappeared into the forest to cool off, but not without shooting me a glance I had not seen in years.

Well, I might have omitted one or two details here, but for the next hour, I was alone, conjuring steps into the mountain wall and looking for a natural path under all that snow while Eris took her time elsewhere.

When she returned, her expression was calmer, though her determination hadn’t wavered. She simply stood at the foot of the cliff, examining my progress without comment.

A dangerous ascent began. 

As far as memory goes, I expected stray shafts not far from us. We should be able to get in through one of those. Along the path I found and forged were already small holes, some hidden beneath the snow and turning into dangerous pitfalls. We kept this up until I finally found a hole that was big enough for me to fit in and had a sharp stream of air rushing our way. 

“I go in first. Wait for my signal in case I get stuck. Don’t forget to send our backpacks down before you enter. Also, we turn back when the cave has collapsed or is full of bandits, understand?” I finally said, offering a compromise to our argument.

She nodded, a small smile forming.

I carefully slid in and down a rough shaft. With a heavy thud I landed in cold wet stone. Our backpacks and Eris followed shortly after and I quickly healed the bruises and cuts we suffered from the shaft.

We summoned two lamplight spirits and tried to orientate ourselves. The tunnel we were in barely made it possible to stand straight. The floor was plain, pointing to the fact that we were in a dead end rather than the main tunnel. We strained our ears for anything that could give away others. Nothing. 

Walking with our nose against the cold airflow for some time, we eventually reached the main passage. Even though years had passed since the last time we were here, there were still little to no signs of anything ever moving through here, let alone living here. 

Yet I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was trapped in here with us. Hidden somewhere in these eerie shadows. Licking with its tongue the wet air that carried the taste of Eris’ sweat. With only the two of us, this place felt awfully claustrophobic.

We continued to walk along the path until the number of—

Something slender retreated into the bends. I jumped with a faint squeak back, into Eris’ arms. The shape of a jagged tooth flickered between the shadows. 

Until Eris stepped forward. Her lamplight spirit lazily revealed a protruding rock. Sharp, but no tooth. “Hah. Just a trick of the light,” I called out in my usual deep and dauntless voice. Eris nodded, as if assured, and offered me her arm. I latched on immediately.

As I was saying earlier, we followed along the path until the number of the diverging shafts went uphill and got large enough for us to comfortably walk through. This was the cue to take some rest.

After setting up a basic camp and a fire, I made tea and snacks. We sat in silence, with occasional slurps and distant rumbling quivering through the atmosphere. I took the first watch. Eris chose to lean against my back to doze a little. Of course, this beats having the dirt of the ground on your face any day of the week, but still, I appreciated it.

With the towel she had cleaned herself in hand, I sat there for who-knows-how-long and mulled our situation over. The tunnels looked maintained yet void of signs of life. I knew better than to simply believe so—this could just as well be part of the trap. 

I regretted the things I said to Eris earlier, and the answers I demanded. It was stupid to fight over something like this and no excuse for me to use the helplessness I felt against her. 

Then there was that look in her eyes. There was something in them that was not a reflection of disappointment or anger. But what then?

I wondered, should I ask her out of innocence?

So Eris, what’s your plan here? No, not again.

No matter where we go, I follow you to the edge of the world. Oof that’s cheesy.

My fair lady, may I… Oh god.

Hey, glad you are up! I prepared our equipment, you want to tell me what to do next? Now that’s a direction. Huh, how could I miss that? That was in her eyes—a request for my presence.

“Did you say something?” said Eris’ groggy voice in my ear. I hope not!

“No, nothing.” I murmured, trying to keep my cool. Oops, I might have mumbled away to myself. I got a good stretch and mentioned as casually as possible, “I already laid out our equipment so we can hang our backpacks up there,” and made myself comfortable to rest.

"Eris?" I said and snuggled against her back, "I’m sorry for snapping at you." She responded with a nudge. I took that as a sign of understanding and relief. And perhaps she was right. If our date has shown me anything, it’s that I don’t need to count every leaf on a tree to appreciate its beauty. In this case, I just need to be there and pull her out when the time calls for it.

***

“Rudeus. Rudeus. Come oooon~ I can see a light at the end of the tunnel.” My eyes snapped open. She squatted in front of an entrance and peered up, eyes squinted. My body slackened in relief.

I managed to persuade her to eat her ration before we got to the thick of things. The path she was keen on exploring was but one of many available to us. An almost straight tunnel with a modest incline. The floor looked slick here and there, so we had to check how slippery the path would turn out to be.

But before we entered any of the paths, I did two things first: check in with Eris if she was ready and the other paths.

I clapped into my hands and began, “Eris, it’s time.” She nodded.
“Emergency healing scroll in your bag?” Another nod.
“I will create more paths and give us more ways to attack, so wait for my signal, OK?” Nod.

“Good. Lastly: are you ready to slay some dragons?” 

She gave me a sinister grin and responded, “Hmpf! You know I am! I’m ornery, don’t you remember?” She raised her chin proudly and crossed her arms. Atta girl!

So our hunt began. 

We crawled all the way up to gain a grasp on the layout of the mountain. Though first we needed to conquer the ascent itself. The way was smooth but long—longer than expected. 

To both my surprise and ease of mind, there were small pits and no hidden ducts. The pits could be used for footholds or even places to hide in, while the lack of ducts meant that we did not have to watch out for nasty little monsters from above. As strong as we were, it would only take one Earth Ripper at the wrong time landing on the back of your neck and that would be the end.

Every so often, we froze—when a shadow muted the light at the end, or when something huge slammed down, shaking the walls around us. 

Reaching the end revealed a sight to behold. Despite how high we were, we only saw ridges upon ridges, clawing their way through the mountain range.
Below were flat patches nested between sharp cliffs.
To our right stretched the fertile land of Asura.
Our left was difficult to judge, with a boulder between us and what seemed to be a small cave.

And above us: a daunting assembly of Red Wyrms hungered in the air, each fighting their way up in their food chain. There had to be dozens of them. 

After observing the scenery in front for a while we retreated to prepare. The cave entrance in particular was to our interest, as it simply offered more space to move around than a two by two tunnel entrance and a cliff. The flat surfaces below were also an option, but the closest patch was some 50 meters of rough terrain away.

So I started terraforming. I dried and extended the entrance, added grooves for better footing, leveled the areas where Eris would launch herself from and where I could stand, even adding small openings to sneakily cast through. 

Eris seemed like she wanted to say something about the shape and practiced precision of my peepholes, but refrained from more than rolling her eyes. What? Curiosity never killed anyone and was a popular sport in Japan.

After numerous preparations, I connected this tunnel with the others we had examined before. Additionally, I dug out zig-zag recesses along the tunnels that went in the opposite direction from where we would retreat from in case we needed to flee from sudden high-temperature bursts. And lastly, I increased the size of the pits so we could lay down in them and crawl into a small pocket. Hopefully, all this would keep us from being burned alive.

This took some hours, but Eris waited patiently. She watched the Red Wyrms in the meanwhile like a benevolent tyrant. It was also a sight I had to commit to memory: Just her, sitting relaxed in the opening, her sword resting against her shoulder. Super cool! 

I stepped beside her and peered out of the opening. The noonday sun blinded me in return, hiding most dots in the sky. “Anything interesting happened out there?” I asked half jokingly, since there was not much of anything out there.

“Look,” she pointed at two lone dragons offside from the big cluster, then moved over to a dragon high up in the air, “that one is going to kill those two when they come our way.” 

I then watched to see if her forecast was right. It was nigh impossible to discern distance and size of all these beasts with only the blue sky in the background and no other point of reference. I also got to observe some erratic flying and as a result lost track of the ones I was watching. 

Soon, her prediction came true. The bigger dragon dove down on them, tearing through both their wings in a moment where their focus lay somewhere else. Having lost control, both tumbled to death. In a dying act of revenge, they shot breaths of fire into the sky, resulting in a fierce vortex. Even from here their impact could be heard. Surprisingly, not a single dragon went after them to feast. Why was that?

Suddenly, being here felt like a far worse idea than I had thought. All of this displayed a world I wanted no part of—savage predators killing for sport who may be masters of the above, but not above malice. This insight hit me just how dangerous these monsters were in their own element.

“How did you know that one would target these two?”

“They lost over a mistake they made a while ago.” explained Eris with a hint of awe. “When I was training with the Sword God, he once talked about talent. But not how those who have it turn into lazy idiots. The other kind. I think I understand that better now, Rudeus.”

I thought about her words for a bit. “So the dragons here are not just wild beasts who target the unaware, but talented fighters?” It made sense in the classical way of the survival of the fittest.

“I never knew how much grace dragons have in their technique. That must be why Orsted fights so well in every way,” she finally said. I watched her expression, unsure what to say. She didn’t seem to have second guesses. But she definitely had boosted respect for Orsted, these monsters and their ways.

Eris got up and nodded towards the crashed dragons, “Rudeus, don’t make their mistakes.”

I retorted with a confused look. The same mistake? Like flying into a cluster of dragons? I’m already doing that. Or was she referring to a mistake I did not see? I made an educated guess that there was more to it, “Eris, can you please be a bit more specific?” 

She cocked her head, eventually realizing what I meant, and started rubbing her chin. “Your position is everything. Where you go; where you were. Don’t get in a position where you are alone, can’t see up well or, uh…ah, where they could strike from anywhere,” she went on to explain and nodded, pleased with her tactical assessment.

“I see! Thank you, that is really good insight,” I said, genuinely impressed. She was right. In contrast to that one straggler or the Earth Dragons, I only ever fought them on the ground. These beasts had all the time in the world to watch me make a mistake and exploit it. Was I right to assume then that, instead of fighting power, the one with the most situational awareness dictates the fight?

I hope my preparations are enough, I gulped. With a glance at Eris, unshaken and geared up, I steeled myself.

“OK, follow me.”

As Eris rose, I noticed a small patch of glovers reach into the tunnel. And in the center of the spot Eris’ fat ass had flattened, a four-leafed one smiled back at me. I plucked the little rascal gently from his bed, and nested it above Eris’ ear.

“Idiot,” she scoffed and went ahead.

She discovered the zig-zag route to our left. This path led to two more openings and behind the boulder I dug out, making it possible to see the sky past it through the cracks. Further along was an exit that led to the cave we saw, which turned out to be more of a small platform than anything. To tell the truth, I had anticipated to discover a nest in these small shelters; because where are all these dragons even coming from??

Eris nodded, satisfied with my constructions and the ways it opened up for her. “Now the only question is how we get up to them , or them down to us. ” I said, curious to see if she had already come up with an idea.

In response, she struck her usual pose and said… nothing. At first. But then, just before I could offer some options, she simply asked me, “Do you trust me?”

I faithfully nodded, “I do.”

“Then go to the next opening and bring one of them down already.”

Her words were my command—but not without a goodluck-peck on the cheek and squeeze of her butt. She remained steadfast, a light blush gracing her face.

The flock above offered me no easy target. A close inspection of them using my Eye of Clairvoyance revealed no easy pick, as all of them looked like competent fighters. I charged up a Stone Cannon nonetheless—extreme rotation, extreme toughness, extreme damage. I took aim and let it tear through the air.

The spell cut through the air with a whistling shriek, a sound that made my skin crawl, reaching the crowd in seconds—but passed harmlessly through. 

The second projectile caught their attention. 

The third one finally connected, tearing through the neck of a random dragon in a spray of blood. The dragon recoiled, breathing fire at the others in a blind reflex. But despite the grotesque jets of blood and fire from its torn neck, the beast did not go down. On the contrary—it locked eyes with me.

The flock scattered. 

The injured dragon dove straight for me. With one eye three seconds into the future, I switched into rapid-fire mode and started blasting. A few glanced off its hide, but it adjusted its flight almost instantly, weaving through the rest. My spells started missing entirely. I kept firing anyway, aiming for the wings and eyes while the gaping jaws raced toward me at terrifying speed.

It closed the distance in no time. I caught a glimpse of the raging hate in its eyes just as I shattered a couple of its teeth. Then came the moment I had been waiting for: it sucked in a massive breath. I spun and ran into the tunnel.

I almost stumbled when the massive body slammed into the cliff, shaking the entire earth. Everything around me turned dark, a clear sign that its body blocked the light from entering. It gave me the shivers, even as I slid into the safety of an adjacent path.

A massive explosion erupted. The fire charged through the tunnel, licking into my passage. Even the far end of the tunnel lit up, giving me an idea about its reach. The heat was pressing against me, as if eager to get a spark to jump over. It was unbearable.

But there was no time to hesitate. Thanks to my foresight, I jumped back onto the path the fire cut out and fired a charged Stone Cannon into its maw. The attack caused a disgusting splashing sound and gore. But this came with a price tag. 

The floor was still smoldering red, heating up my armor and burning my feet. In a reflexive attempt to protect my feet I began to freeze the area around me, but had to limit the range and intensity when a loud cracking sound near my head made me flinch.

And still was the beast not dead. Roaring and adjusting for yet another breath attack, it struck the opening with its claws, tearing down half the footing I had prepared.

From within the tunnel I saw its torn neck sway and lined up another shot, when a red flash zipped by, separating the head from its neck. Eris quickly entered the opening, a lifeless body audibly crashing down the cliff. 

Carefully avoiding the glowing surfaces, she jumped past me with a smug, “First~” and darted into the next passage. This minx wanted to make it a competition, huh? Very well!

I slowly made my way back to the opening, biting through the pain. Then my future sight depicted something weird. In muffled groans of pain, I hurried the way back into safety as a storm of flames engulfed the entire ridge. 

This gave me at least time to numb the pain with ice. I would have to take off my armor to heal the wounds, which was hardly possible here. All I could do was to bear it.

The roaring outside ended moments later. The dragons seemed satisfied with the hazard they caused, surely thinking that no intruder would survive that.

Through the battle sense Eris and I shared, we both peeked out of different openings and launched an attack of our own. 

Eris launched herself from the small platform high into the air, slicing a passing dragon open from neck to heel. Her prey came down with her onto the small platform, crashing against the protruding cliff above. It tried to burn her to a crisp, but its lungs only mustered a wheeze. It attempted to strike her with its tail. Something Eris did not allow.

I for my part fired a barrage on a bigger dragon that flew at me as a distraction; something I easily saw through thanks to my eye. The real attack was another dragon, hiding in its blind spot. The first dragon took a sharp turn up, making way for the fire the dragon behind had already sent my way; the benefits of being immune to their own attacks. I backed up a little, shot a Stone Cannon out and defended myself with ice. Their attack was not long or effective, but surprisingly smart and coordinated. 

As soon as the second dragon turned away I dropped the ice wall, hopped into the entrance and shot a supercharged Stone Cannon after it. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my shot rupture its head open, as I looked up to fight the first dragon—which looked right at me. Shit!

I was too careless to notice that it had landed. Heat radiated from its open jaws, about to breath fire, only meters away from me. I saw it swallow me. There was no time left.

The dragon suddenly jerked its head around, a loud clashing sound ringing through the air, like a sword hitting scale. More rumbling followed and I finally unfroze, swallowing hard.

Before I could process it, Eris barreled into me. “Move!” she snarled, yanking me deeper into the tunnel. The last thing I saw was the dragon’s mangled tail and a deep cut at its leg. 

I checked on Eris, alarmed by her panting. Her shoulder was torn to the bone. My stomach dropped. There was no time to retrieve a healing scroll, however, we had to move. Multiple big hits against the cliffside told me something bad was about to happen.

We rushed as far as we could through my zig-zag construct and into a small space in the middle. Just in time, the tunnel lit up brightly, heat filling the space around us. What I did not expect, however, was how every tunnel around us got filled with fire. We wouldn’t last long if this kept on. 

Still, I started to both apply a healing scroll to the groaning Eris and cool down the area, fending off the heat. I had to be careful here, as steam began to threaten to steam us instead.

It dawned on me that I had made a mistake. A mistake that almost cost Eris her life. “Eris, let’s leave it at that, shall we?” I offered, trying to keep a begging undertone to a minimum.

“I’m fine,” she retorted, a slight strain in her voice. But safe for that, she was more than determined to push further. 

“Fine,” I said, a compromis in mind, “The first to get five wins, then we leave. Deal?” She agreed to my terms with a spurred grin. “One more thing: the last one, the one you cut off its tail, did it seem like it was waiting for you?” She confirmed my worry with a nod and explained how it had evaded her killing blow. 

I knew it! The dragon had turned the tables on us, using me as bait. It wanted me to kill the other dragon and be distracted. It would then have either burned me or switched over as soon as Eris appeared. Which was exactly what must have happened, the only difference being that Eris was faster and more aggressive than anticipated. 

The flames were still roasting our hideaway. Despite the precious time I managed to heal Eris. Now it was time to get out. 

After asking Eris from where she wanted to launch her next attack, I intensified my ice magic. I didn’t go all out, but used enough to block the fire so she could rush through. Next was giving her an opening. These dragons were not the only ones with tricks.

I maximized my magic output for a short time, making my ice blocks burst out of all the openings. Granted, my ice melted away at a fast rate, but it was enough to interrupt some of them. On top of that, I went out of the tunnel we came in, hoping they would not expect that. And sure enough, the dragon that was busy with mine clearly wasn’t anticipating getting its jaw broken.

Judging by the turmoil outside, Eris started to instill fear into these monsters, hopping in and out of our whack-a-mole cliff. She was way too comfortable dashing through these smoldering tunnels, feeling right at home.

I limped over to the next opening and used wind magic to further cool off the tunnels and get rid of the haze that was starting to hinder us. Honestly, I also wanted to properly fight and not play ventilation. 

To turn my words into action, send earthen lances at the injured dragon, impaling it on the spot. That puts us at an even two for two. Our positions were now inverted, with me standing where we—or rather, Eris—slayed the first one. 

An enormous fire torrent tore me from my thoughts. My entire vision got filled with ascending dragons, scattering about and greedy for a piece of Eris. Some remained airborne and retreated back into the sky while a few had chosen to fight on the ground, jaws open like snapping turtles.

I tore holes into the wings of some flyers, but none seemed too bothered about it. My plan however was also not to kill them, but to keep them away, so we can deal with fewer at once.

I stopped my attack after hearing something above me. It was Eris, traversing above the tunnels to get to me. The way she looked behind told me that one of these beasts was chasing her. But the way she ran past another opening told me that she wanted me to shoot as soon as the beast came into sight.

I charged, I aimed, I waited. Eris, against my expectations, ran past me, and… no monster came into sight. Then, with a thunderous racket, broke the dragon through the top of the ridge, crashing through boulders and sending debris galore our way. Did this mad dragon use its height to turn itself into a bomb? Hold on, these dragons are having way too much fun! Within all this chaos, I witnessed the tattered dragon fold its wings and limbs and slide on its belly our way.

With a click of her tongue, Eris jumped out of the way while I retreated, once again, into the tunnel. This is getting old. Then my eye showed me something new: dotted clutter, rippling down like getting dizzy, and growing into nothing.

Then my surroundings caved in on me. 

I threw myself forward, propelled by an extra explosion into the darkness. My foot got caught under a rock, altering my course, and with a heavy groan I smashed into the wall, and lost consciousness.

***

Eris!  

I jumped up. I cursed everything and lit up the path. How much time had passed? I wondered anxiously and rushed to the next opening, still dizzy. I listened out for any noise, hoping for any signs of an ongoing fight, but the damn world had conspired against me. Just silence and my steps, loud as an ogre, drumming up a headache.

My heart dropped to another floor when I reached the next exit—or rather, where one was supposed to be. The next one was also destroyed. I got even more restless and realized why Eris had been running on top of the cliff. 

Playtime was over. I blasted a big new entrance and looked around. The sun had not moved much, there were still plenty of dragons circling in the air, and some corpses lying about. A massive wave of relief washed over me when I spotted Eris on a flat spot a good way down. However it got quickly dampened by the heavy smell of iron and flesh and by the surrounding dragons—some fiercely alive, some not so much—and her heaving chest, not getting any opportunity to catch a break.

I analysed how I could help other than sliding down to her side. One corpse lay at her feet, but three more paced, their tails lashing like whips. But no fire. It almost seemed like they were enjoying this fight. And more alarming, how assured they seemed of their victory. And then I saw it: the tailless dragon, perched on a distant outcrop, watching. Waiting.

A distraction was needed.

I scurried back into the tunnel, over to the side into the small space behind the boulder. My luck so far was poor, and it was about to become rotten. Through the gaps, I aimed the boulder as best as I could, crouched behind it with my back pressed to the wall, and caused an explosion.

My plan worked, at the cost of violently rupturing my eardrums. The boulder sailed high through the air and crushed the back of a dragon. Without missing a beat, I grit my teeth, stumbled forward, and fired spell after spell at the dragons to rip off wings or crush bones. 

But aiming was almost impossible. My head was pounding with pain and I had to swallow hard not to throw up. Even while firing spells, I tried to recite the incantation to heal my head to recover my sense of balance, but kept stumbling over the words I could not hear.

Eris made use of the distraction to the best of her abilities. As soon as the dragon in front of her jerked around in shock about his broken back, she instantly sliced off its head, and pressed on. Next was another dragon that tried to distance itself from my barrage after being hit in its wings. It also succumbed to its fate, but not like Eris anticipated.

In the moment Eris’ sword sunk into its eyes, its wings tucked away to reveal its sacrifice to allow the tail of another particularly careful dragon, crushing her shoulder in return.

Eris flew into a corpse, her livid eyes now fixed on revenge; a careless moment the tailless forth dragon used to his advantage. With jaws wide open, he crashed through the corpse, catching Eris by her arm for just a second before she pushed herself off. She caught her fall with a spin, swapped her sword hand, and nicked the neck of the dragon before making her way up to me.

However, the two dragons did not appreciate her early departure. The stone slates I sent their way made the chase difficult enough to allow her to reach me before they did.

Yet instead of running deeper into the mountain, Eris did what only Eris would: she planted her feet beside me and raised her sword high, its tip slicing the air as if daring the dragons to climb higher—or fall beneath her feet trying.

Maybe it was the glint of the blade that caught their eyes, or maybe their instincts screamed that this was a trap. Either way, the two dragons slowed, hesitated—and changed course.

I grabbed her and ran. There was a long way until safety; and I felt that we wouldn’t get that far. I poured as much mana through my hands as possible, freezing the tunnel behind as against the fire that would inevitably come any moment now. The tunnel went dark—just like before. The dragons were about to breathe fire, and I was certain of it.

Eris had picked up on the chain of events to come, and dragged me with her, almost carrying me, while I transformed everything behind us to ice. If I could hear a thing, I would have probably remembered to be careful about it; not to slow down, but to look out for the structure. 

This resulted in the tunnel, still hot from the last breath attacks, to crack and splinter. Multiple protruding rocks exploded. Sharp shrapnels flew about and pierced our flesh, while the frozen wall behind us began to weaken.

Then I sank into the ground.

We had reached the ditch in the ground, laid down as flat as we could, and crawled up into the pocket. A wave of heat burst by. I did not stop to freeze against the hellfire that rushed through the ruins of my network, pleading with it to leave us air to breathe.

Eris lay beside me, sweat streaking down her face and into wide disbelieving eyes. Then she said something whilst looking me up and down. I shook my head and showed her my bloody ears. 

The vibration of the fire began to weaken. This was the last step into safety: I placed my hands on the ceiling of our small stone pocket, closing the tunnel with wide earth magic. We both waited a minute in silence for any warnings, face to face, shoulder to shoulder. It worked. We had made it.

We both scooted out of the narrow pocket into the spacious ditch, dimly lit by the glowing rocks around us, and took a deep breath. All the tension and stress washed off of me, and my arms relaxed into cement blocks. A nap would be the best thing in the world right now.

Eris slapped me in the face. She was saying something. She had a look of anger and unease on her face. I became groggy, and it became harder to focus. With my eyes on her lips, I recited the incantation, and healed my head.

All at the same time, my face relaxed, the pain went away, and the nausea disappeared, and her words reached my ears.

“I’m divorcing you if you die on me here.”

“Overruled,” I replied, worn out, “and I won’t die any time soon.”

Pleased with my answer, her expression turned into excitement. She started to vividly recount her experience while I got to healing her wounds. In exchange she healed my soul with her laughter. 

After most wounds were cared for, I just lay back, listening to her and watching the twinkling of the stone walls, like a thousand tiny suns.

When she took a break to tell me about the highlights or her fights, I asked her to help me heal my burned feet. She got calmer, and removed my boots. Then my pants. Then my shirt. And, after a long moment, hers.

***

Side by side, we stood in the gaping opening of our tunnel, overlooking the battlefield. The flock of dragons above still looked massive, as if we didn’t even make a dent in their numbers. 

I had made the tunnel accessible again at Eris’ request, presumably to finish what she started. However, even as we descended down to the corpses, weary of any potential attacks, none of the beasts tried something. All they did was watch. So we collected some teeth and other ingredients, but mostly meat.

Near the cliff, we spotted the tailless dragon—it had finally succumbed to its wounds. That made five kills, then.

“That makes five,” I said. “You won. Any price in mind?” I perked my lips.

Eris blinked at me confused, then pulled me in for a kiss. “Why did I win, though?”

Now I was the one blinking in confusion. “The dragons. I thought—never mind.”

She smirked. “You were counting?”

“Weren’t you?”

“No,” she said, scratching her chin. She forgot, didn’t she? Or perhaps…didn’t hear me?

She walked ahead, her coat flaring, her voice drifting back like smoke. “I just wanted more time with you.”

Then we left the place behind. 

—

Later, on our way back home, I remembered something. I looked her over, but couldn’t find it.

“A pity you lost your lucky charm.”

“My what?” She asked. 

“The clover. They are said to bring luck since they are rare.”

“No, I didn’t,” said Eris and fished it out of her pocket, “see?”

I tried to snatch it out of her hand, but she jerked around, grabbed me by the shoulder, and planted the clover in my hair. I would have preferred it the other way around, but seeing her snickering was worth even becoming a bouquet.

“Hey, Eris. Remember when you first brought up our date?

Her gaze,
Her strike,
The mountains height.”

I freestyled my best attempt at poetry.

“Now you try it,” I requested.

“No.”

“Fine then. But Eris,” I began, “did we resolve any of your troubles?” I had no doubt in my mind that there were no issues anymore. She had proven to herself what she was capable of and not doubt her ability. Perhaps she even learned a thing or two. “At least you can forget about the Sword God now.”

“The Sword God? What about him?” Eris cocked her head.

“Huh? I thought…almost losing to him had made you doubt yourself?”

“Hmpf. No way. He lost. We didn’t. End of story,” she snorted. Seeing my confusion, she tried to explain, flustered and fidgety, like she wished I could just read her mind.

“I wanted to be with you alone—just you and me.”

That was the clearest thing she’d said. Then she opened up more. Some things confirmed my guesses—like how she felt jealous of Roxy. Simple enough. She wanted the same kind of fun.

But what I discounted was the thoughts she put into our journey. Just like with the date Roxy and I did, we did other things as well, not just the labyrinth dive.

The travel itself, for example. From what I gathered, it seemed that she was unsure about most things. 

She wanted to lead me to a good time. But where to go? Where not to? That stuff proved to be tough. Even the decision if we should go and fight dragons; though that was probably an easy choice. And so, her search entailed finding things that could be worth doing that might even be equally fun. 

This, with an added dash of surprise, would surely make for a fun date—so she had hoped. And that was what we got. Yet, and to no surprise at all, was it the dragon fight that gave her what she wanted. 

Like Roxy followed her strength, so had Eris. And I’d spent enough time with her to recognize it when she came alive.

And I certainly did, on that mountain.

***

My sword,
My life,
My four leaf clover,

She copied Rudeus’ strange phrasing—and cringed. The last words had accidentally slipped through her lips, dangerously close to getting caught by the ear. 

There was a fresh tingle in her chest that grew when she glanced at Rudeus. It reminded her of a dance they shared a long, long time ago. But this time, the dance was with dragons. 

Rudeus was still staring into the distance. Good. She was not ready to have him hear her poetry, and might never be. But she would still keep those last words close to her heart.

I want this,
One more time,
And then one more.

In the end, our date was streaked with lessons learned, a small tour through what-could-have-been, and how things have turned out the way they were supposed to be.

Thank you for that.