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wooseok let out another yawn as he sat slumped over his desk. there was barely enough room on the cluttered surface for his textbooks and laptop, and he was barely getting any work done, considering how low his attention span was after a mere 3 hours of sleep. beginning college was not easy, let alone right before comeback season. he was so busy, so tired all the time.
a glance at the clock overhead told him it was 9:30 at night. wooseok just sighed, looking over at his halfway-finished paper that he'd already been working on for two hours. he'd even opted to skip out on evening vocal lessons, aiming to focus on his studies for the day, and he still couldn't do it right. to make things even harder, that also left him alone in the dorm, with the others at either vocal or dance classes. (he'd usually be at his parents' house for the night by now, but he really needed to get this done.)
wooseok thought for a moment about how nice it'd be if the others were home now – for silly reasons, like to ask for advice about his essay structure, or to just have someone to talk to – but, on second thought, maybe this was best. wooseok always took it upon himself to lift the others up; being like this, all unmotivated and anxious, would just bring everyone down. he tried to hide this side of himself as much as he could, to give a better example to the younger members and not let the hyungs worry. they don't need anything else to worry about.
but the further this went on, it became even harder. wooseok felt stupid for it at times; these assignments weren't that hard, really, and he was sure other people out there had it worse. but wooseok just wanted to have no worries, for once. was that too much to ask? especially with all of the music shows having just come to an end, he'd been busy to the point of having no personal time. wooseok shook his head and looked back down at his notes – writing this english paper was starting to feel like a punishment.
he focused a little harder, telling himself that if he just got this done now, he could get some good sleep. when he was finally beginning to get the hang of it, though, wooseok heard a faint knock at the door to his room, which startled him to the point of dropping his notebook to the floor. he never heard anyone enter the dorm, and who could it be at this hour, anyway? the members were supposed to be at practice.
"yes?" wooseok called out, actively concealing any unease that came to his voice. the door opened slowly, and wooseok found a smile coming naturally to his face when he saw who it was.
"wooseok? still working?" hanbin asked, peeking his head around the door.
wooseok turned around in his chair, "yeah, almost done." he paused, "aren't you meant to be at practice?"
"they sent me home early. the others are, though," hanbin said, taking a seat on the edge of his bed (this was hanbin's room, after all. wooseok only took it over as it was the only room with a desk).
the two of them shared a few minutes of comfortable silence, hanbin packing away his bag while wooseok continued on his essay. it didn't make the writing come any easier to wooseok, though; he was still at a loss on what to do.
the negative energy radiating from him must've been obvious, because before he knew it, hanbin was commenting on it. "how's it been going? english, right?"
wooseok sighed, sending hanbin a half-hearted smile. "it's... it's going. i don't know. it's hard."
"wanna talk about it?" hanbin asked, stopping what he was doing to stand beside where wooseok sat. "i might be able to help."
"hmm, if it isn't too difficult?" wooseok offered.
"what? like your english is any better than mine."
wooseok giggled, "it is, kaedan told me so."
hanbin shook his head. "that kid..."
after a moment, wooseok looks back down at his essay, and he instantly feels any humor leave the room's atmosphere. he put his pencil down, complaining, "it's not even hard, i just can't get myself to do it."
hanbin nodded in understanding, rubbing wooseok's shoulders absentmindedly. "i get it. you've been working for a while, have you had anything to eat?" he got lost in thought for a moment, before adding, "minseo was gonna order chicken after practice, i can bring you some.
wooseok tensed up the slightest bit. "i haven't eaten yet, no– but it's okay, really."
hanbin tilted his head. "you sure?"
"yeah, i'll be fine. regardless, the company said..."
"the company said what?" hanbin interrupted with a frown. "dieting again?"
wooseok just nodded, looking back down at his paper wistfully.
hanbin just looked down at wooseok, over to his open notebooks and laptop, and back to wooseok. "how long have you been working now?"
"a couple hours..?"
and with that, hanbin grabbed wooseok's arm, pulling him up out of his chair with surprising force. "it's time for a break. come on."
wooseok looked down at hanbin, looking like a deer in headlights. "hanbin hyung? but i'm almost done..."
hanbin shook his head in disapproval. "we're going outside for fresh air. and for something to eat."
"but the manager said–"
"the manager can go to hell."
wooseok couldn't help but laugh at hanbin's blunt response, and he found himself feeling just bit lighter in spirits. maybe this would be helpful. very impromptu, but helpful.
hanbin led wooseok to the front door, grabbing down his coat and handing it to him. it was cold outside; even in mid-spring, the weather was freezing in the evening. hanbin grabbed his keys and his wallet as wooseok packed his bag and got himself ready. right as they were about leave, wooseok wrapped his arms around hanbin in a warm hug.
"what's this for?" hanbin laughed.
"just 'cause." wooseok smiled right back at him, patting him on the back before stepping back and opening the door.
the cold air hit them immediately as they stepped out, turning wooseok's cheeks rosy as he followed hanbin's lead. "where are we going?"
"somewhere," hanbin shrugged, linking his arm with wooseok's to pull him in closer. "let's see what we find."
"sounds good," wooseok said cheerily.
as they walked, hanbin brought up his concerns from earlier again. "really, though, how was the essay going? did anything happen?"
wooseok felt his optimism meter take another drop at this question. "no, not really. i just wasn't motivated, like, at all."
hanbin hummed thoughtfully. "i've seen you, wooseok, you rarely take breaks. you're probably getting burnt out."
"it's kinda hard not to be," wooseok said plainly, "there's a lot of things i have to do. i need to fit it in."
"do you fit in any time for yourself, though?" hanbin asked. it was odd, just how concerned he seemed to be. wooseok felt him pulling his arm even closer as a quick gust of wind blew past them.
"not really, i guess," wooseok said, looking down at the ground. "but it's okay though, really–"
"it's not, though!" hanbin insisted, "it's okay to complain about things sometimes, you know."
"i'm not a complainer, hyung."
"when something's hard for you, you need to talk about it. it's fine to be a complainer."
"but..." wooseok protested, "i don't want anyone to worry about me. i can manage."
"i still worry about you," hanbin said softly, going silent for a few moments.
wooseok looked over to him, noticing how hanbin's ears had gone red. was it because of what he said, or because of the cold? regardless, it was cute. "i worry about you, too," he admitted.
"why?" hanbin asked.
frankly, wooseok couldn't think of a 'why'. it was just something that came naturally; worrying about hanbin more. thinking about hanbin more. and even while wooseok didn't want anyone to worry about him, oddly, it felt nice to know that hanbin did. and so, he deflected the question. "i don't know. why do you?"
"i don't know." they both laughed together, wooseok rolling his eyes.
the streets of seoul weren't the most conventional place for a walk, with the winding sidewalks, busy chatter and speeding cars all around them. but to wooseok, it was calming in a way; the ambience, the change of scenery, hanbin's presence.
it was something about hanbin. wooseok didn't spend all that much time with him – compared to the other members, at least – but whenever he did, it was so fun. they understood each other perfectly, could joke around with each other for hours, yet still were close enough to share a comfortable silence whenever they needed to; like now, when wooseok's mind had been full of worries, and now only consisted of lee hanbin and what should we eat?
they walked aimlessly, hanbin relying on pure instinct for his directions. how they were going to get back to the dorm, they weren't sure, but now wasn't the time to acknowledge that. anyways, it was fun; walking like this, without a plan, gave them a chance to look around, to see places they hadn't stumbled upon before. as the time went on, the air seemed to get colder, but hanbin's soft words (and his body heat) managed to keep wooseok warm inside.
eventually, the two of them came across a row of food stalls, some closing up for the night, while others were still actively selling and cooking. wooseok looked over to them, and back to hanbin, just to see hanbin was already looking at him.
"should we go look?" hanbin asked, voice pitched up in what could only be described as mock-cute-aegyo-tone.
"yeah!" wooseok giggled, matching hanbin's energy and making him laugh. wooseok took a loose grip on hanbin's hand as they crossed the street to look at the food stalls.
wooseok looked over the options, hanbin letting him take over the lead. "they have hotteok, fishcake... ooh, tteokbokki sounds really good right now," wooseok said to himself. he looked over to hanbin for approval, his face lighting up when hanbin gave him a warm smile and a thumbs up.
wooseok dragged hanbin over to the tteokbokki cart, cheerfully placing his order as hanbin pulled out his wallet. wooseok hoped hanbin wouldn't mind paying; but judging by the cheesy grin that still adorned his face, wooseok could rest assured than hanbin didn't mind one bit. hanbin even ordered himself a cup, too, which came as a surprise to wooseok.
"weren't you gonna have chicken later?" wooseok asked after they'd grabbed their cups and headed to the nearby picnic tables.
hanbin shrugged again, "tteokbokki sounds good, you know."
wooseok laughed, taking a seat first. he watched with curious eyes as hanbin placed his own cup down, hovering around where wooseok was instead of sitting down. he rested his hand on wooseok's shoulder, and moments later, he briefly pressed his lips to wooseok's forehead.
strangely, instead of freezing up, wooseok found himself smiling at the gesture. if it'd been anyone else, wooseok had for sure felt awkward.
interesting. why'd hanbin doing this sort of thing make wooseok feel so... warm? (surely it was because of the weather. and the contrast between that and hanbin's body temperature. yeah, that.)
hanbin took his seat and watched for wooseok to take his first bite. wooseok's face lit up instantly, closing his eyes as he hummed in delight. "i was right! it's so good." hanbin smiled to himself, starting to eat his own as he listened to wooseok describe the flavor in detail. that was something cute about wooseok, his affinity for food; something hanbin hoped the world would never take away from him, because the way wooseok enjoyed his meals was always nice to watch.
maybe it's just because hanbin liked seeing wooseok happy. maybe that's why he'd get so worried about him at times.
as they kept eating, the conversation eventually advanced to college. "how has university been treating you?" hanbin asked, "besides the essay. don't think of that."
wooseok gave a small grin, "it's been good, really. makes things a lot busier than usual, but it's nice." he pauses, "it makes me feel more like a normal person. is that weird?"
hanbin shook his head, "no, i get it. i liked going to classes when i was a trainee for that reason."
"i wish i could go to more classes," wooseok sighed, "it sucks having to start right when we had a comeback. i keep missing everything."
hanbin gave a soft laugh. "didn't you go in for midterm exams the other day? how'd you do it?"
wooseok winced, smiling as he said, "whatever happens, happens. that was the first time i was even able to attend the class, so..."
hanbin tilted his head at him, dumbfounded, "for the midterm? how'd you do it?"
"willpower and strong intuition!"
hanbin laughed, shaking his head at wooseok's pure optimism on the subject. moments later, wooseok picked up his phone, saying only a resound, "i need a picture for bandi."
that boy and his dedication for the fans. hanbin admired it, really; as much as he himself paid attention to bandi, he knew it couldn't be a fraction of what wooseok felt.
when hanbin looked over, he noticed wooseok still had a bit of sauce at the corner of his lips. so, while he was focused on fixing his hair, hanbin reached over the table to wipe wooseok's lips with the side of his hand. wooseok's hand froze in midair at this, his eyes slowly moving over to hanbin's. "what?"
"you had something on your face."
"i could've gotten it."
"but that'd be no fun, would it?" hanbin joked.
"shut up," wooseok replied in a joking tone as he started taking selfies. after he was satisfied, wooseok flipped the camera to get a picture of his food. that was another cute thing about wooseok, all the pictures; selfies, food, sunsets, sunrises, outfit-of-the-days. he documented everything, even the bland and mundane.
why was everything about wooseok so cute, all of a sudden? wooseok was cute before, sure, that was a given, but why was it such a prominent thought in hanbin's mind at the moment? hanbin didn't think too hard on it.
wooseok continued conversation once he was done with his pictures. "so how was practice? same as always?"
"same as always," hanbin affirmed, "we practiced the unit song, and the others just kinda sat around and listened."
wooseok quirked a brow, "couldn't they have been sent off to dance practice?"
"no, they had to watch so we could be good role models," hanbin rolled his eyes, "it was really awkward, really. i love them, but having all 4 of them stare at me while i sing is really off-putting."
wooseok just giggled, listening intently as hanbin rambled on about his time at practice. he rested his elbows on the table, and propped his chin on his hands, watching hanbin more closely. hanbin talked with his hands, his words drawn out or more exasperated in tone when he needs some extra effect.
hanbin was so fun to be around. hanbin was cute. even when he'd joke around with the other members about it, wooseok meant it when he called hanbin cute, while the others would just do it to rile him up. at one point, wooseok stopped listening to his words, plainly focusing on hanbin's face as he spoke.
hanbin noticed, unfortunately. "what?"
"what?" wooseok echoed, snapping out of it. he sat back a little, muttering a soft 'sorry'. they kept eating for a while, talking about everything they'd been up to lately, until they finally finished.
"should we go?" hanbin asked, reaching over to put his hand over wooseok's. wooseok nodded with a smile, moving to stand up and collect their empty cups and chopsticks. by the time hanbin himself stood up, wooseok had already thrown everything away, reaching out to take hanbin's hand. he oblidged, letting wooseok lead the way back where they came from.
they walk back through the row of food carts again, wordlessly, but at one point, wooseok let go of hanbin's hand, rushing over to one of the stalls by himself. hanbin hesitated on following him, watching as wooseok cheerfully ordered something that hanbin couldn't recognize from where he stood. a minute later, wooseok came running back with two small cups of ice cream. he placed one into hanbin's hands, picking up the spoon and explaining before hanbin could even ask, "i remembered you like this kind. have some."
and with that, wooseok was feeding hanbin ice cream, in the middle of the street on a random thursday. hanbin did like this kind; mint chocolate, the good kind that wasn't too overpoweringly minty. hanbin hummed, "this is really good. thank you, you really didn't to..."
wooseok cuts him off, "it's fine. it's only fair, you got me out of my bad mood."
"i did?" hanbin smiled, taking the spoon into his own hand as they started to walk again.
"mhm!" wooseok affirmed, not saying anything else as there was still ice cream in his mouth.
"i'm glad," hanbin grinned, putting an arm around wooseok's shoulders. "are you gonna finish your essay when we're back?"
"i don't know," wooseok considered after a moment, "i might just finish it in the morning."
hanbin nodded, "that's a good idea. you need some good sleep."
"do i? i went to bed at 3 last night and i was fine–"
"yes you do," hanbin insisted.
"okay," wooseok whined, "fine."
hanbin asked after this, "are you gonna drive back to your parents' house for the night?"
wooseok's expression looked thoughtful. "you know what? i think i will."
"i can pick up your supplies so you can get back to work in the morning–"
"no, no, it's okay. i have it in my bag already."
"such a good planner," hanbin teased, reaching up and ruffling wooseok's hair playfully. wooseok giggled, looking down at the ground.
they, miraculously, made it back to the dorm – by muscle memory or pure luck, they weren't sure – and prepared to go their seperate ways for the night. wooseok moved to hug the older boy again, his embrace warm and comforting. "thank you again, hyung. this really did help."
"of course," hanbin reassured, resting his head in the crook of wooseok's neck, "anything for you."
"we need to do this more often, it was really fun," wooseok said, a grin on his face as he pulled back slightly to look at hanbin.
they were so close. and in that moment, to hanbin, wooseok looked impossibly cuter. that smile, the way his eyes crinkled up, the pink of his cheeks. hanbin couldn't hide the dopey smile that came to his face as he replied, "definitely."
wooseok couldn't seem to pull away, as even when he was backing up, his hands stayed grazing hanbin's arms. his eyes wandered for a moment, which made hanbin curious enough to start looking around too.
but when he wasn't looking, he felt wooseok lean in closer. and, for what felt like a split second, wooseok gave a quick peck to hanbin's lips. hanbin's eyes naturally widened as wooseok pulled away, and he brought his hand up to his lips.
the look on wooseok's face was puzzling; pleased with himself, but also embarrassed. it was clear as he ran away to the building's parking lot, calling out a final "thank you, hanbin hyung!" before disappearing around the corner.
hanbin blinked a couple times, his hand never coming down from his lips. did that really happen? it was really hard to tell.
and, anyways, why was his heart beating so fast all of a sudden? and why did his face feel so warm?
what was wooseok doing to him? did he even know the effect he had on him?
his head still full of thoughts, hanbin made his way back into the dorms, fumbling with his keys and almost tripping on the stairs two seperate times.
regardless of the meaning of what just happened, hanbin could at least say that he didn't not like it.
––
and as wooseok drove home, it was incredibly hard to focus, thoughts flooding his own mind. he was overthinking the whole thing, for sure; but it was the good kind of overthinking, if that made sense. what did hanbin think? what did that mean for us? why did i do that, and why am i still smiling so hard about it?
wooseok tried his hardest to pay attention to the road regardless. he had fun that night, and he definitely feeling way less burnt-out than he was before. going outside was a good solution; or was hanbin the good solution?
wooseok came to the conclusion that he wouldn't mind struggling on a thousand more essays, as long as it meant he could spend more time with hanbin.