Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Hello one and all, and welcome to another thrilling episode of Dimension 20, Fantasy High, Sophomore Year! This is the continuing story of a group of students at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy, the world of Spyre's premier academy for heroes. The world of Spyre ia a classic high fantasy world full of wizards, dragons, goblins, and elves, except for the nation of Solace, which, due to its high level of arcano-tech and its collaboration between all the various classes and species of Spyre, has seen itself advance into a John Hughes-esque, 1980s teen drama kind of country, with elemental cars and hot rods, diners open all night, crystals that operate a lot like smartphones, and all kinds of teen drama, centered at the Aguefort Adventuring Academy in the little town of Elmville.

Here we find ourselves in the midst of sophomore year. At the end of freshman year, our intrepid heroes foiled an apocalyptic plot, rescued a number of kidnapped people at the end of a long mystery, thwarted Kalvaxus, dragon emperor of the Red Waste, and laid him low after learning he was secretly their vice principal Goldenhoard all along! In the wake of his defeat, the Bad Kids still needed to contend with the disappearance of the crown of the Nightmare King, which went missing in the last chunk of freshman year.

Though the Bad Kids wanted to go get the crown right away, they have been held up by investigations into what the crown exactly is and who may have taken it. Also, because of the state of war between Fallinel and the nation of Solace due to the events of freshman year, they have not been able to leave the country up until this point. It's taken Arthur Aguefort some time to remend the privileges of the Aguefort Academy after the year where he was technically dead and in heaven, impersonating Sol the sun god.

A lot of things have happened. Figueroth Faeth (tiefling, rock star, and best friends with her non-biological dad, Gilear) has been touring with Fig and the Cig Figs, along with Gorgug as her drummer (who honestly thought they were all best friends). Riz Gukgak (goblin rogue, and best friends with everyone, but especially Fabian Seacaster) has become a new licensed private investigator. Adaine Abernant (a wizard dealing with her mental illness and is sure everything's gonna go great) has been studying all sorts of divinatory practices from around Spyre, as well as fulfilling her role as the new elven oracle, though she is not in touch with the elven population at large. Kristen Applebees (a cleric who is figuring out her new stack of spells) has been fulfilling her role as the new prophet of the Church of Yes?, a god created during the prompocalypse of the previous year. Fabian Aramais Seacaster (son of the not-so-recently deceased Bill Seacaster (who admits that these people are his friends and he does enjoy spending time with them) has been resolving matters that relate to the estate of his late father, as well as putting together a mission to save his beloved (Alwyn Abernant).

We are going to spin the clock forward, all the way to right before spring break, specifically, the Saturday before spring break of sophomore year. A moving truck trundles along with a small car following behind it through a neighborhood of Elmville, up near the highway, past Cravencroft Cemetery and up above Haversham Hill, on their way to Mordred Manor. We see a tall, old, Victorian-style manor with holes, shingles missing, strange iron wrought gates, and gargoyles. There's a ruined chapel off to one side, to another an old, little private graveyard, and a spiraling tower. The moving truck and the little car roll up to the front of the manor house, stopping outside an old fountain on the circle gravel driveway. Stepping out of the moving truck, Jawbone calls out,

“Whoo, all right, look at this place! This looks great, I can't wait!”

For, indeed, Jawbone and Sandra Lynn, after less than a year together, have bought a home. Fig worries that this might be a pattern for Gilear – she thinks this isn’t the first time that someone's broken up with him and then immediately found their soulmate.

There's a lot of reasons the new couple wanted to move in together: first of all, Jawbone and Sandra Lynn are very much in love. Jawbone combines a lot of the things that Sandra Lynn has always looked for in a partner. He's lived a very full life, but he's also a very stable, loving partner. Sandra Lynn is able to fully understand all of Jawbone's sordid past and his struggles with lycanthropy. Jawbone is in full hybrid werewolf form, which he almost always stays in as a kind of political statement, as if to say ‘I'm living with my disease openly and that's something that we should be able to talk about.’

It looks really good. He's got his glasses on, but his normal cardigan is off for moving day. He's got a little A-top that's brightly colored in pastel, Easter colors, jorts that are so short the pockets come out the bottom, and a little hole that his tail can pop out of. He calls out to the assembled crew,

“All right, great! So we're gonna do furniture first. We loaded it up so the furniture's gonna come off first and then we're gonna do boxes. Obviously, books can go in where books are gonna go, but let's talk about priorities first: getting the kitchen set up, all the things we're going to immediately need. Let's do it, I love moving day!”

Kristen and Adaine step out of the car and take in Mordrid Manor, which looks full of cobwebs, ravens, bats, etc.

In addition to wanting to move in together, the new couple moved because it was getting a little bit crowded at Jawbone's old drug dealer apartment. That was the issue, that it was crowded, not the people turning up at three o'clock in the morning and Jawbone having to explain ‘I'm a guidance counselor now, I don't do that anymore, but why don't you come in and talk. Let's talk about what's going on and hopefully I can help you find the drugs that you're looking for if we feel that's the right choice for you, but let's talk about it’.

Sandra Lynn arrives, flying in on her griffin mount, Baxter, who caws and lands picturesquely on top of the giant, haunted-looking mansion. Sandra Lynn Legolas-slides down the steep-sloped roof and lands on the ground beneath just in time to see a huge tour bus pull up with a huge wraparound decal of Fig slamming on a bass guitar. Fig makes a big show of kicking the door of the bus open and yells

“Hey, everyone, I'm home! I just want everyone to know, approach me like a normal person. Yes, I will do signatures and autographs.”

“That was a sliding door, why did she kick it?” Adaine asks no one in particular.

Gorgug come out behind her. “Can I have an autograph?”

“Absolutely.” Fig replies.

Kristen looks at Gorgug. “Aren't you in her band?”

He nods, expression unchanging. “Yeah, can I have an autograph?”

“Wait, you want an autograph from everyone?” Kristen asks. “Do you want us to just sign your yearbook, Gorgug?”

He shrugs. “Yeah, that’s what I’m asking. I missed the time when everyone did it.”

Adaine says “Oh, I'll sign your yearbook!”

Fig's agent, Lola Embers, comes out of the bus. Lola is a young fire genasi, her hair a short spiral of flame. She's wearing huge, chunky jewelry and giant, ruby-studded, horn-rimmed glasses. She's holding a giant potion in a to-go chalice, with a mobile order sticker on the side.

“Lola, where's the merch leftover? The leftover merch?” Fig asks.

“Leftover merch? Honey, there should be a box in your bedroom in the back of the bus. If it's not there, I will call someone and we can get it teleported over here immediately.”

Kristen narrows her eyes and sizes Lola up. She can tell Lola’s job is to make herself somebody's problem on behalf of the people she represents.

Lola notices Kristen’s gaze and meets it. “Is that okay with you?”

Kristen throws her hands up in a surrender gesture. “That's okay. It's okay with me.”

Adaine nudges Kristen “Step off, Kristen!”

Lola breaks into an overly friendly smile. “Hi honey, you're one of the…what are they, The Bad Kids?”

Fig sighs, exasperated. “The Bad Kids, I gave you all of their pictures! I said ‘These are the most important people in my life.’” She pauses. “Pretend like you guys didn't hear that.”

Lola waves her hands, shooing away the details. “Fig, I love it, I love it, I love the whole adventuring thing. It's a huge angle and, honestly, when we book the next tour, that's what we're gonna sell – this is someone who actually lives the life. This is someone who's writing from a place of knowing. I love it!”

She moves her attention back to Kristen. “So you are… Fabian Aramais Seacaster.”

Kristen shakes her head. “No. I'm not.”

“Try again, Lola,” says Fig.

“That’d be crazy,” says Gorgug.

Lola tries again. “You are….Gorgug Thistlespring.”

Kristen shakes her head again. “No.”

Gorgug looks at Lola. “We’ve— we’ve met.”

“Gorgug's in the band. His face is literally on the bus.” Fig points out.

Lola waves her hands again. “Look, it's been a long day, all right? The merch should be in the back, let us know if not.”

Sandra Lynn walks over to Fig and sweeps her up into a giant hug.

“Hi, Mom,” says Fig, muffled into her mom’s shoulder.

Sandra Lynn gives her a kiss on the side of the head. “The tour was good! I watched every night that I could through the crystal. It looks like you were killing it, sweetie, and Gorgug, you as well.”

Gorgug nods. “Thank you. I was.”

Jawbone looks over and says,

“Oh, all right, young miss hot shot. I'm glad you could show up!”

“Be careful, I'm gonna offer to play karaoke for your opening day at your house. Your housewarming party!” Fig shoots back.

Jawbone chuckles. “Oh, well, should we be so lucky. Well, all I know is this. Last one to claim their room's a rotten egg!” He moves to the back of the moving truck and takes up a big box of stuff.

Fig and Adaine disappear, using Dimension Door and Misty Step respectively.

“I feel like he should get the master bedroom.” Gorgug says to Kristen.

She shrugs. “It’s too late.”

Fig and Adaine appear in the front hall. Adaine looks around. “There's one with a tower, right? I'm going for that tower.”

Fig says “I'm going for whichever one has a fireplace in it.”

Adaine Misty Steps again to the tower, and sees it is Dr. Seuss level stuff. The stairs are propped up with stilts and rafters and it actually hangs so that the top of the tower isn't over the main structure of the house but zig-zags up and off to the side. Fig and Kristen appear in the doorway, Gorgug trailing behind carrying a nightstand.

Fig looks around and says “This seems really nice and secluded, but I'm actually learning to open up to people more, so I'll take one that's more central. Oh, but look, a giant fireplace!”

Adaine gives her a look, already halfway up the stairs. “When did you get rude?”

“What? I'm sorry, that was a genuine, sincere thing.”

“Yeah,” Kristen chimes in, “I have a question about this whole tour bus. It feels like a lot.”

Adaine agrees, “It feels like a lot.”

Kristen asks “Are you loaded? Do you really need a whole—”

“Am I loaded?” Fig wonders aloud.

Suddenly, Arthur Aguefort appears in his purple suit and says, “I'm afraid it's much more dire than that, young Miss Applebees.”

“What?” Kristen asks.

“What do you think she said?” asks Gorgug.

“Yeah, what do you think I said?” Kristen repeats.

“That was...a really nice try.” Adaine says.

With grave gravitas, Principal Aguefort says “I'm afraid, young adventurers, that you are all loaded!” Gold coins start to shoot from his sleeves.

“It took us the better part of the year, but we have finally extracted the last holdings of KVX Bank and as the slayers of the mighty dragon, you are entitled to a share of the wealth.” he explains.

“This is dire?” Gorgug asks.

“Yes, money corrupts, absolutely! Your souls are in jeopardy.” Aguefort replies.

Kristen shakes her head. “Yeah, I don't want any of this money, honestly.”

“Too bad!” Aguefort intones.

“Do you know how many people need food just in the swamps alone?” Kristen asks indignantly.

“You can spend it on food,” Adaine points out.

“Oh.”

“You could give it to them,” Gorgug adds on.

Kristen nods. “Oh, right. I can be anti-money, but I can still accept the money and make sure it goes to the right place.”

Aguefort cocks his head. “I don't know what it is you think about swamps that people don't have food—”

Kristen interrupts, “I did a trip! I did a humanitarian trip to the swamps over the summer. I built homes, I gave out food. The homes did sink, almost immediately. But we are gonna go back for take two, to build a home on top of the sunken home, and the first one will probably prop the second home up.”

“You're building swamp Venice.” Fig suggests.

Kristen nods, considering. “I am building swamp Venice, yes.”

Aguefort says “In any case, the funds have cleared and were transmitted to the Aguefort Adventuring Academy, and now to you. Each of you shall be the proud recipient of 20,000 gold pieces.

Kristen was first to speak. “What?!”

Aguefort shrugged. “You killed a dragon. You guys remember that? It was wild. I came back to life. Remember when all of the gold blew up out of the bank?”
Adaine says, “Now I have 20,010 gold pieces.”

He claps his hands. “Very well. Now, you are minors, so I would recommend that you talk to your parents about the most responsible way to spend this money, putting it into the bank, et cetera. However, are Mr. Gukgak and Mr. Seacaster here? Their funds have also been transmitted.”

“No, they're probably hanging out somewhere”, says Fig.

“They decided not to help move,” Kristen explains.

Adaine moves down the staircase to join the group. “Professor, I was wondering if I could bring a emotional support familiar to school?”

“Of course, absolutely! An emotional support familiar sounds like an excellent way of bolstering your spirits while you are at Aguefort. What are you thinking? Something sort of cuddly and soft that would help with your anxiety?”

Adaine nods. “Yeah, like a frog, I was thinking a frog.”

“An emotional support frog? Aw!” Kristen exclaims

“That's precious.” agrees Fig.

Aguefort chuckles wryly. “Well, my young friend, if a slimy, expressionless frog fills you with a sense of wholeness and wellbeing, who am I, a man who regularly has sex with a phoenix, to tell you that you're wrong?”

“What?” Fig asks.

“Extremely regularly.” he says matter-of-factly.

“Which iteration of the phoenix?” Fig wonders. “Ash or the one that spreads its wings?”

Aguefort pauses. “I need to write something down. Ahem. But, yes, we should get Mr. Seacaster and Mr. Gukgak here to resolve the issue.”

Kristen, not willing to let it go just yet, asks “That's daily, right? Very regularly?”

“Anything more would require…. well, spells. Salve.” Fig muses.

“His autobiography was very spicy, so at least daily.” Adaine offers.

…

We cut over to the neighborhood of Ballaster. There is a short, four-story stone building with some old, musty offices in it and a police car pulls up outside. Exiting the police car with a box of stuff is Detective Sklonda Gukgak, and her young son Riz Gukgak.

Riz received word about his newfound financial situation earlier today, and his mother, after insisting some be set aside for college, as a gift for all of Riz’s hard work, has rented him an office. Their tiny apartment in Strongtower Luxury Apartments has not been able to hold Riz’s conspiracy board for some time. Up two short flights of cracked, musty, character-filled, marble steps, is a frosted glass door with gold lettering on it, saying "Riz Gukgak, Private Eye."

Riz looks around the room, taking it all in. “It's beautiful, Mom. I think I'm really gonna spiral here.”

Sklonda sighs. “That's not what I want to hear.”

“Just go nuts inside here.” Riz sets his briefcase on the table and starts to unload files onto the desk.

Sklonda pinches the bridge of her nose. “I don't want to hear spiral. The point is for you to have a place where work can stay, so that when you go home, you can rest and eat and get sleep.”

Riz shakes his head and continues to unpack. “I think I'm just gonna spiral here, Ma, but like in the romantic way,, you know.”

Sklonda puts a hand on his shoulder, gently turning him to face her. “Look, you're 16 now. I have two short years to try and get some spin on this ball that is careening wildly out of control. You are a good detective. You cracked the case. Look, the work of a hero is never over and if you're gonna be an adventurer and investigator, you have to find a way to pace yourself. Because if you burn out, and the next apocalypse happens, you're no good to anybody. So let's use this office as a way to prioritize workspace and work time and private space and private time. Right?”

Riz nods. “Right.”

As soon as she turns away, he pulls a sleeping roll out of his briefcase-of-holding and tucks it under a little wooden desk. It looks like it could be a receptionist desk, a lamp with a gold chain pull string attached to the side. There's a small room to one side that could be for a partner, or could be for file cabinets and storage. On the other side is a room with a little window and another wooden desk that you could put your feet up on and have a cup of coffee. There's a bunch of sliding blackboards and wheeling cork boards. It's a whole investigator's office.

Riz moves one of the boards to assemble the conspiracy wall for his latest case. Having reached a dead end in the Nightmare King's crown investigation, at least until the borders opened up, Riz had accepted a commission from Fig to investigate Porter, the barbarian teacher. Riz was still unsure of why Fig was so suspicious, but couldn't turn down the money at the time. After several stakeouts watching him through binoculars in a strategically parked car, Riz has nailed down that Porter goes to the gym, has a family, and overall seems like a really good guy. He takes a lot of trips to Fantasy Vitamin Shoppe for protein powders and a lot of supplements. He has a community gym that he's a part of, where he regularly attends movie night. He cares about the community; he seems a better than average person, honestly.

Fig isn’t convinced and, to be fair, Riz doesn’t have his driver’s permit so he’s had his mom drive and park the car, and could only do 15 minute stakeouts here and there. Riz looks at Fig’s reply to his latest update: You're fucking half-assing it, man!

He takes a selfie in front of his cork board to post in the group chat.

Ready to get back to work, gang! There's desk space for everyone!

…

We cut over to downtown Elmville. In a back alley with his letter jacket, eye patch, sword of the Seacaster at his side, and the rumbling engine of The Hangman next to him, Fabian Aramais Seacaster is approached near a small side street by Seacaster Manor by a whistling halfling postman. As the postman approaches, he says,

“Well, hey, there, Fabian, how's it going, pal?”

Fabian smiles. “What's going on, Bud, how are you?”

Bud Cubby begins to rummage around in his postman’s bag. “Oh, you know, I'm doing good. Daisy's doing great, she's been pulling a couple doubles over at the diner, so that's great.” He pauses, then lowers his voice. “Listen, bud, I got your message and I did a little bit snooping here and there on the inside. I made some copies of some top secret letters and stuff like that. I got your information from the state department – there was a fascist stooge. We found some of his info and I'm happy to share that intel with you.”

He pulls an envelope from his bag but hesitates before handing it over. “Gosh, you know, we would love a donation if you're able to. Just because, you know, we're trying to get some more balaclavas and we're trying to get the encrypted crystals and, you know, the whole nine yards.”

Fabian waves his hand flippantly. “Bud, you know I'm all about the resistance. 100 gold pieces sound good?”

“Oh! Beautiful, that's great, that's generous. I appreciate it, bud.”

“All yours.” Fabian tosses a pouch with 100 gold pieces to Bud and is handed in return a dossier of elven intelligence files. He finally has the location of Aelwyn Abernant.

The Hangman rumbled, “Sire, we finally have the location of your beloved. She's in prison. We can break in there and you guys can make out.”

Fabian feels the quest to save his beloved take over him, a flaw, an ideal, a personality trait. “Hangman, stop, all right, you're getting me all–”

“You guys can make out!” the Hangman repeats.

“Well, yeah, of course we're gonna make out.” Fabian says

The Hangman revs its engine. “Let me smash through the wall and you two can make out!”

“Oh, I swear, Hangman, nothing gets me more revved up, huh?”

Bud, watching a 17 year old talk to his motorcycle about making out, says “Ah, gosh, young love, you crazy kids. Well, I wish ya the best, I really do.”

Fabian coughs, remembering Bud’s presence. “Hey, thank you so much, Bud. I'm sure we'll be in touch.”

“Oh, absolutely.” Bud gestures to the files now in Fabian’s hands. “If you need any help breaking those people out; there are a lot of people in that elven prison, political dissidents that were arrested because they spoke out against the powers that be, and gosh knows we got a bunch of halflings with long, sharp knives who would love to go and take 'em to task.”

Fabian grins. “Oh, I love to hear that.”

“All right, bud, you have a great day. Hey, give my best to the rest of the gang. We all tuned in to Fig's show. We loved it, we had a great time.”

Fabian agrees, “Incredible, right? I mean, she's unreal. And Gorgug…” Fabian mimes playing the drums. “I mean, he's doing it. He's doing it.”

Bud nods. “Oh, sure. He's on there, he's on the ones and the twos or the threes and the fours. All the dang numbers. I love it. You have a great time, okay pal?”

Bud walks off down the alley and Fabian opens the dossier again. It says that Aelwyn is being kept in Calethriel Tower, southeast of Stelamere, in the mountains of the capital of Fallinel. Fabian finally has the name of the prison, which had been one of the big stumbling blocks until this time. Fallinel's a huge country and she could have been in any number of places, but now he has the exact location.

Fabian mounts his motorcycle. He decides to join his friends at the manor. He doesn’t understand why they wouldn't just pay people to carry their stuff, but, whatever. He’ll go hang out and just dream about kissing his girlfriend.

…

Fabian arrives on the Hangman just as Sklonda arrives with Riz. The rest of the Bad Kids come out to meet them and soon after Wilma and Digby Thistespring arrive. The two gnomes rush to Gorgug, clinging to his knees, as high up as they can reach.

“Well, hi, there, bud. You were so great on the tour.” they say, voices overlapping.

“Aw, thanks, Mom, thanks, Dad.” Gorgug is carrying a giant box of books that's hurting his back so badly.

The Thistlesprings release their son’s legs. “Oh, well, let's give you a hand here,” They stretch out their hands to help carry the box but cannot reach it until Gorgug bends down. He straightens up and lifts his parents fully off the ground. His back hurts a bit worse now.

Stumbling up the driveway comes a reeking, towering gollum, made of sewn-together body parts, with a strange, bulbous eye, and green alchemical beakers pumping fluid into his head, and wearing a snappy blue blazer.,

“Hello, is this O'Shaughnessy-Faeth, the new owners of the house? I'm Golsum, I'm the proprietor of the estate. So happy to have new owners coming in!”

Fig stuck out her hand. “I'm Figueroth, I'm the daughter.”

Golsum shook her hand. “Nice to meet you. We're so excited to have you guys moving in. I just want to show you some of the amenities now that you guys are here, show you around the place. This place hasn't had tenants in about 40 years. It is severely haunted and I do mean that as a literal term.”

“I'm actually really good friends with a ghost, so I'm excited!” Adaine said brightly.

Golsum looked relieved. “Wonderful, wonderful. That's great, that's wonderful.”

“Is this a bad haunting” Riz asked. “Just like people who knock over books or…?”

Golsum shrugged. “One man's tomato is another man's tomato.”

Riz nodded. “So bad haunting, okay.”

Jawbone comes out of the house and rushes over when he sees Golsom. “Oh, let's go, get over here, bud!”

Jawbone gives him a big hug then looks over at the rest of the group and says, “You can imagine, it's kind of hard for a werewolf to nail down a house. A lot of banks won't let you take out a mortgage. But Golsum here had one of the few properties that I could get my hands on.”

Fig looks over at the holes in the roof. “I think it's smart to buy a fixer-upper.”

“I agree!” Jawbone says.

Golsum leads the group through the property. Adaine soon breaks off to return to her lofty wizard's tower. The room is incredible, especially compared to the tiny little bedroom Adaine had at her parents house. There’s a perfect spiral staircase that climbs up the wall, lined with empty shelves. Adaine starts to Mage Hand books into the bookcases from her meticulously organized boxes, already knowing exactly where everything is going to go.

Fig stands in the room just off the foyer. “I'm trying to be more open with people in my life, so I think I'm just gonna set up my bedroom in the living room. So I’ll be really accessible.”

She and Gorgug set down Fig’s giant plush velvet bed next to a roaring fireplace, in one of the arched doorways of the clearly public room. Riz, returning with a glass of water from the kitchen, has to crawl across her bed.

As Fig goes back to get another box of stuff from the bus, Adaine sneaks over to Fig’s bed and casts Enlarge/Reduce so it’s a few inches smaller – enough that Fig wouldn’t notice until she got into the bed.

Kristen walks down the stairs, taking in Fig’s set-up “Why are you trying to be more open with people? What's this new Fig?”

Fig lugs a suitcase onto her bed. “Well, because I realized I push everyone away. I didn't let people in and I've learned—”

Gorgug interrupts “I really feel like you let everyone in—”

“You wear your heart on your sleeve.” agrees Kristen.

“All up in your business.” Fabian calls from the couch currently located in the hall.

Riz hops onto Fig’s bed. “You always say, ‘I know I don't usually do this,’ but then you would pour your heart out. We know you, I probably know you better than—”

Fig shakes her head “This is the power of friendship. You guys are telling me what I think I want to hear, but I know the truth.”

“We're not lying to you.” said Adaine.

“You weren't a closed book. You were crying…” Kristen points out.

“A fully open book.” agrees Gorgug

“You were letting us know how you were feeling.” Kristen continues.

Fig doesn’t look convinced. “Thank you.”

Gorgug looks over to the hallway. “Does this mean I put the couch in a bedroom? What are we doing with the couch?”

Sandra Lynn with a box full of kitchen stuff pauses on her way to the kitchen door (the one not blocked by Fig’s bed). “ I don't… I don't know. I think yes.”

Riz looks around Fig’s chosen room. “Are we putting a dresser in here?”

On the other side of the hall, the Thistlesprings are going around with a bunch of weird contraptions, opening closets and vacuuming the various weird specters into a box attached to their back. They wave at their audience and Digby says, “We're gonna let these guys loose over in Cravencroft so they're not causing any trouble or a ruckus to nobody.”

“It's very catch and release.” Gorgug comments.

“Catch and release, exactly!” said Wilma.

Riz shrugs “Trap, neuter, release the ghosts.”

Adaine and Riz begin to search for hidden doors around the house and quickly discover that every single room in this manor has a secret passageway to every other room in this manor, ending in various trap doors and disguised bookshelves. There's far too many. There's one grand piano that fully flips upside down into just a bowl that holds the piano. It's not even for anything other than to flip the piano and make it disappear. Upon discovering this, Fig starts moving her bedding under the piano. Kristen inspects the trap door and says,

“The piano becomes your bed? That's cool.”

Just then, Tracker walks into the room. “Hey, Kristen.”

Kristen immediately blushes. “Hi.”

Tracker grins. “How's it going? I haven't seen you since we got back from the mission.”

Kristen nods, “Yeah, how have you been?”

“Good.”

“How are you?” Kristen asks again, returning the grin and starting a separate conversation with her eyes.

“I'm super good.” said Tracker, returning the gaze.

Kristen broke into a nervous laugh. “Cool.” She accidentally nudges the switch that flips the piano back up. Riz, who had been trying to help Fig set up her bed, disappears into the hidden compartment. “Nooo!”

Tracker ran a hand through her hair. “Do you think my uncle would let us share a room here or is that weird to bring up?”

Kristen’s eyes widen, not having considered that. “Yeah, I think we should! We're like adults, I think it's like—”

“You're 17 now.” Tracker points out.

Kristen nods excitedly, “We should split a room.”

Riz knocks against the floorboards. Fig figured out how to flip over the piano from inside, but Riz is too small to get necessary the momentum.

“Is that weird?” Tracker asked again. “I just feel that's like weird… or no?”

Kristen starts rationalizing. “I always have a key to your place, so why not have it be a key to… also my place. You know what I mean?”

Tracker nods along with Kristen “Right, yeah, exactly. And you crashed at the old apartment a lot.”

“All the time!”

Sandra Lynn walks in the room with her bow slung over her shoulder. “Hey, Kristen.” she says warmly, moving over to her and Tracker.

Kristen smiles. “Hey.”

Sandra Lynn puts on her mom face. “Hey, sweetheart. So you guys,” she said looking between Tracker and Kristen, “I have your rooms picked out.”

She points at Kristen, “You're gonna be in the southeastern wing and Tracker's gonna be up in the northwestern, okay?” Sandra Lynn mimed the directions, making it clear they were to be in as separate rooms as possible.

Kristen nods quickly, smile frozen on her face. “Okay, sounds good to me, yeah.”

Sandra Lynn smiles, not sensing a fight. “Cool?”

Kristen is absolutely frozen. “That's great”.

“We understand each other?” Sandra Lynn presses one more time.

“I think that sounds….” Kristen hesitates, glancing at Tracker who is giving a ‘go-on’ look but also not speaking up herself. “...so cool.”

Sandra Lynn’s smile fully relaxes and she moves into another room to continue unpacking. Jawbone starts to follow after her and says,

“Hell yeah! Hey – more fun when you're not supposed to.” He laughs, touching his two middle fingers to his thumb, shaking his hand. “Jawbone.”

Kristen watches them leave, mouth agape, still processing the conversation. “What?! Whoa, I…wait.” She pulls Tracker aside. “I cracked, I'm sorry, I cracked. It's just that frequency of a mom's voice. You want to become sexless, you know?”

Tracker shakes her head, equally as fazed. “I've been a wild child for the past five years and… I don't put my elbows on the table when Sandra Lynn's eating with us.”

Kristen agrees, “Yeah, she just has that presence.”

Kristen and Tracker go to pick out their rooms, Kristen heading to the southeastern wing. She’s mostly looking for a room with a view. She first finds a bedroom at the top of the stairs that overlooks most of Elmville; however, tucked in a corner is an old, ruined chapel. It has a broken shine and the wreckage of stained glass windows scattered on the stone.

Kristen stands in the doorway of the chapel “ It sounds triggering,” she says to herself,
“and I'll take it. I'll sleep in the old chapel.”

Mordred Manor starts to come together. A lot of the ghosts when they get wind of what the Thistlesprings are doing just agree to be cool and hang out. Adaine, close to done unpacking, looks out the window and sees Zayn Darkshadow in the graveyard, with his ghostly rat Edgar on his shoulder

The ghostly, goth wizard elf with his translucent ghost box, tethering him to this plane, is being moved into the smaller graveyard by Jawbone, who has been taking care of Zayn since the end of freshman year. Zayn waves up to you.

“Hey, Adaine!” Zayn calls.

She waves back, “Hi, Zayn.”

“Could have called it. Nice tower!”

Adain opens the window and sticks her head out. “Thanks, isn't it cool?”

Zayn looks around at the house and graveyard he is currently being entombed in.
“It's awesome here.”

Adain gestures back to her room. “Do you want to see?”

“Yeah!” Zayn says.

“Can you come up?” Adaine asks.

He looks over at his grave, now added to the row of plots in the private cemetery. He moves his box into the open pit that Jawbone has dug. His eyes glow for a second and he says,

“Eternal shall I stalk the manor of Mordred.”

With a little blast of energy, he becomes anchored to the house. He fist pumps. “Sick!”

Zayn floats up to Adaine’s window, peering in “Oh, it's awesome in here. Do I have the oracle's bidding to tread upon her sanctum sanctorum?”

Adaine laughs a little at the formality. “You may absolutely tread upon my sanctum sanctorum.”

“Are you guys gonna do it?” Kristen asks loudly, walking in the room.

Zayn glares. “No!”

“Why are you in here??” Adaine asks, annoyed.

“Sorry!” Kristen backs out of the room.

Zayn looks around the tower. “This is tight, this is cool. I really like it here.”

Zayn has become so much more friendly and bubbly since he became undead. He wanted to be goth but now that he's dead he's not a tryhard about it anymore.

Zayn continues, “This is tight as hell. It's great for studying, but you got a bead on the neighborhood.”

“And the view is great.” Adaine agrees.

He looks up at rafters, holes from where the roof has collapsed letting the sunlight stream in. “Honestly, I wouldn't even cast Mending on that, 'cause that could be a nice astronomy place. Get a telescope in there.”

Adaine follows his gaze. “Mm. Yeah, I'm definitely gonna cast Mending on it, but—”

Zayn shrugs, “Hey, honestly, your sanctum.”

“I just…. Rain.” Adaine points out.

Zayn nods. “Yeah, for sure, I get it. But honestly, if the rain came through, and you were sad, and you could cross your arms and sit in it and just be like—”

Adaine interrupts “Right, yeah, I get it. But I feel like that's more your aesthetic.”

Zayn considers. “I'm gonna do that in the graveyard.”

“Great.” Adaine smiles.

Gorgug walks into the room with the couch. “Is this the right–?” Gorgug is the only one still moving furniture into the house.

“Why are you in here?!” Adaine asks again, even more annoyed now. “How did you get that up the stairs?”

Gorgug looks down at the couch he had just dragged up another set of stairs. “Is this not the–? It took a while.”

“On your own?” Adaine pictures the fairly narrow spiral staircase leading up to her door.

“Yeah, I mean…”

“Do you want help?” Adaine asks, resigned. “I can help you.”

Fabian appears in the doorway, holding one book. “I think this belongs to her.” He looks at Gorgug, still straining under the weight of the couch. “All right, I'm gonna go get some more stuff.”

Gorgug looks at Adaine again. “So you're saying not in here?”

“Thank you, but no.” Adaine says apologetically.

Gorgug sighs. “Okay.”

“That's in the living room.” Adaine points back down the stairs. Gorgug slowly makes his way down and almost trips over Fig standing at the base of the staircase.

“The living room actually opened up.” Fig confirms. “So you can bring it there.” She pulls out her phone, making no attempt to help Gorgug, whose arms are shaking at this point.

“Okay.” he says.

Fig types out a message to Gilear: The living room is open, I put a trundle in there for you.

Gilear texts back after a minute: Dearest daughter. I appreciate the offer. I will not be staying in the beloved home of my ex-wife and her extremely personable new boyfriend. I will remain here, in the garage of Hallariel Seacaster, where I have been staying until I earn my place in her bed.

Fig reads out the text to Fabian as he steps out of Adaine’s tower.

He shrugs, unapologetic. “Honestly the only good thing about him living there is that he hasn't earned his place and he never will.”

Fig follows him back into the living room. “You've gotta give your mom over, okay? You gotta give your mom over to Gilear.”

Fabian wrinkles his nose. “I'm not… no. Did you hear yourself? I have to ‘give my mom over’? That sounds awful.”

Fig concedes, “Yeah, that was weird. It's really weird.”

Gorgug is back from the moving truck and struggling under the largest bed on his back that suddenly gets much lighter as Gorthalax, with his coach whistle and Owlbears cap, lifts up the other end.

“Oh, hey, there, let me get the back for you, bud.” he says.

Gorgug sighs in relief. “Awesome, thank you so much. I'm pretty strong but I'm so tired.” he laughs weakly.

Gorthalax looks over at Fig and Fabian arguing as Tracker and Kristen disappear into Kristen’s room. “Yeah, it seems you've been doing a lot.”

Fig leads her dad upstairs to her new room, finally releasing a disgruntled Riz from the compartment under the piano after an hour of being trapped. Sandra Lynn passes by and Gorthalax walks over to congratulate her on the move.

“Sandy, I gotta say, the place looks incredible. I'm so happy for you and Jawbone.”

Sandra Lynn smiles warmly, showing him to the kitchen to continue the tour.

A while later, Kristen joins Riz, Adaine, Fabian, and Fig in the living room, with Sandra Lynn, Jawbone and Gorthalax drinking and chatting in the kitchen a few feet away.

“She has a type.” Kristen commented. “Gorthalax, Jawbone—”

“It's the voice.” Fabian offers,

“It's the kind of gritty, bad boy.” Kristen agrees.

Sandra Lynn walks out of the kitchen, pausing to look back at her new boyfriend and ex-boyfriend talking easily, seemingly not noticing that she left. She frowns slightly. “I'm glad they get along, but they don't have to be that friendly. You know what I mean?”

Fig throws her arm over her mom’s shoulder. “I don't know, it could work out to your benefit.”

Sandra Lynn chews on her lip. “I don't know.”

Jawbone comes over a a moment later. “Gorthalax, that guy rules! He is a great dude, we should have him over for a game night.”

Sandra Lynn purses her lips. “Yeah, maybe.”

Adaine perks up from the couch. “Are we gonna have a game night? I love game night!”

“Me too!” Fig says.

Gorgug joins the group, truck finally unloaded. “Did somebody say a game night?!”

Fabian repeats in excitement, “Did someone say game night?!”

Meanwhile, Tracker has picked out her room in the northwestern wing: an old, creepy, ‘House on Haunted Hill’ -like sanatorium, with a very BDSM-y kind of vibe. Tracker comes up next to Kristen and whispers in her ear.

Kristen’s face turns red. “Game night sounds fun, but I'm a little busy!”

Jawbone and Sandra Lynn order pizzas and the group has an end-of-moving-day party. The Bad Kids and co gather around the table, finally large enough to comfortably seat all of them. As Jawbones distributes the pizza boxes around the table and everyone starts chowing down, Arthur Aguefort arrives.

Gorgug looks up from his plate. “You're not a pizza guy.” he says to the man who has suddenly appeared in the doorway.

“What's that?” Aguefort asks.

“You're not a pizza guy.” Gorgug says again. “You're Aguefort, right?”

Aguefort nods sagely. “Yes, that's correct. But pizza can happen if you wish for it, right?

“I think he just arrived at the same time.” Fig says.

Kristen says through a mouthful of pizza, “He didn't deliver it, he just happened to get here at the same time.”

Gorgug looks over at them. “He just always tries to trick us, so I was just—”

“Why doesn't everyone here grab a slice and sit down with me in the foyer?” Professor Aguefort interrupts. “We have terrible business to discuss.”

The Bad Kids get up from the table and follow their principal into the front room. He stands in front of the fireplace with his hands clasped behind his back as the party finds a seat on the various sofas and chairs placed half-hazardly in the room.

Fabian takes all the cheese off his slice of pizza and dabs at it with a paper towel.

Kristen looks over at him and groans. “Oh, no, Mr. Macros.”

“It's important, all right?” Fabian protests. “I have to keep this physique tight for—”

“For what?” Kristen demands.

“Kissing.” Fabian says quietly, looking down.

“What?” Kristen laughs.

Fabian blushes. “Nothing, nothing. Anyway…” he gestures for Aguefort to continue.

Aguefort looks at Fabian. “Ah, I see that you have performed an act of transmutation, turning your pizza into a thin, damp focaccia”

Fabian shrugs, “I mean, you can call it whatever you want. I just don't need those unnecessary calories.”

Aguefort nods sagely. “I can call it whatever I want.” He claps his hands together. “Children. Listen to me now. We have finally been declared at peace. The war between Solace and Fallinel is over. A cold war though it was, the borders are once again permeable and myself and the faculty have finished the legal matters of clearing your wealth; your share of the dragon's hoard.”

“We can move again? We can leave?” Kristen asks.

“You may leave.” Aguefort confirms.

Adaine looks uneasy. “Do I have to leave?”

Aguefort turns to her. “You do not have to leave. Although, I will say, of course, that the elven government still desperately wants you back in Fallinel. Now—”

“Well, they can respectfully suck it.” Adaine mumbles under her breath.

Aguefort interrupts himself, “What's that? Respectfully what?”

Adaine turns pink. “Nothing, nothing. Sorry.”

“If you've done a bit, I would like to be alerted to it.” Aguefort doesn’t look chastising as much as manically curious.

Adaine glances around, painfully aware of all the attention on her. “Next time I'll tell you. Now it feels a little late.”

Aguefort lights up at the mention of timing. “Ah, except that perhaps it is never too late when you control,” he pauses, “time itself!”

He rewinds time 10 seconds, then leans in to catch Adaine’s mumbled words. He chuckles lightly. “They can suck it,” he agrees.

Looking satisfied, he says “If you feel queasy, I have reversed the flow of time to catch that joke.”

Gorgug vomits on the floor. Riz manages to aim directly onto Fabian’s pizza.

Fabian groans, “Okay, great.”

“Wow, how many calories are in that?” Kristen asks.

Fabian throws his plate on the ground. “Zero. I'm not eating this.”

Aguefort is completely unfazed. “As you may be well aware, normally, a dragon's hoard would simply be collected and divvyed up by the adventurers, but because this hoard was hidden in a bank—Kalvaxus, that coward—we had to go through a lot of legal red tape and engage the Seven Dark Executives of KVX Bank in mortal combat. By slaying them all, finally we were able to release your funds into the school account, and cut those checks to all of you. So, you are substantially wealthier. However! I would recommend investing that money wisely, for, indeed, the quest of the crown of the Nightmare King now unfolds before you. Yes, Adaine?”

Adaine lowers her half-raised hand. “Yes, if they cut us checks, why did you spew gold at us?”

“For effect!” Aguefort answers.

“Oh, okay.”

Kristen speaks next. “I'm gonna tithe 10% to the swamps. They need every cent that we can give them.”

Fig chimes in, “I was gonna say! I'd like to invest in swamp Venice. It sounds idyllic.”

Kristen turns to her. “Great, I'm doing 10%. I don’t know what you want to do…?

“I'll do 10%” Fig replies.

Kristen nods, pulling a notepad and pen out of her pocket. “Great. I'll put you down for 10.”

Fabian leans back against the couch. “I've got a money guy through my dad if anyone is trying to diversify their portfolios.”

Aguefort says, “I would recommend divesting yourself of that money as soon as possible. The wealth, the filthy lucre of a dragon's hoard, has been known to drive adventurers mad. A little taste of gold can send one over the edge.”

“Is that a risk in giving it to other people then?” Fig asks. “Are we gonna drive other people crazy?”

“I was gonna try to work on a van.” Gorgug says.

Aguefort looks at him. “Cool!”

“And I was just wondering, is that gonna make me go crazy?” Gorgug asks.

“I don't know, maybe.” Aguefort turns back to face the whole group. “The quest that lies ahead, my children. The crown of the Nightmare King, as you are well aware, went missing some time after the events of last year's cursed prom. Which, by the way, we can now have again, because the prophecy already happened. So that's fun. The Seven Maidens have adventures of their own to attend to, so you are lined up for this quest. The borders are permeable once more and you have the funds now to finance your own transportation for this quest. You may also conduct the matter of hiring hirelings, which we do love in classic adventurer fashion. You know, people to tote your stuff around.”

“Oh, I've got a whole tour bus.” Fig says. “We can use my tour bus.”

“Oh! There you go.” says Fabian.

“It's a little flashy, it announces us anywhere we go.” Fig continues.

“I obviously wouldn’t hate that, I think it’s cool.” Fabian says.

“Can we cast Disguise Self on just the photo of you on the side of the van?” Kristen asks.

Fig says, “Yes, I can do that and make it look like Goldenhoard.”

“I mean, it does have your literal name on it.” Adaine points out.

“Can we cast Disguise Self on my name?” Fig wonders aloud.

“If your adventure sees you remain within the boundaries of Solace, then that tour bus should be no problem.” Aguefort says. “If your tour goes farther afield and, indeed, if the crown has been taken from Solace in total, I remind you that the nations outside of Solace have not been exposed to our strange arcanotech. If those peasants, out in their fields, in the dark realms beyond Solace, were to hear you play rock music, think of what could happen.”

“Are you saying that my destiny is to bring rock to the peasants?” Fig asks.

Kristen answers for him. “No.”

Aguefort smiles wide. “Your words, not mine, young lady!”

Fig nods solemnly. “I'm up to the task.”

“I just feel like rock music…” Gorgug speaks up hesitantly, “I don't want to speak out of turn but that feels like a thing a grandparent would say, right?”

Aguefort looks at him, smile vanishing. “What?”

“Gorgug, we're in a band together.” Fig says.

“No, I’m saying it's not that big of a deal.” Gorgug tries to explain.

“Yeah, I get what you're saying.” Kristen says.

Aguefort’s look turns into a glare. “Do you have any idea what happened in Solace when rock music was invented? Do you have any idea what you're talking about?”

Gorgug shrinks a bit under his gaze. “I'm not sure, I never heard the story.”

Aguefort maintains direct eye contact. “The first electric lute was invented 350 years ago. When it was first played, every single person of the 225 people in attendance, regardless of gender, became pregnant. Do you understand the power that rock music yields?”

Gorgug shakes his head, unable to look away. “I didn't know that.”

“Do you have any idea?” Aguefort asks again.

“I'm sorry.” Gorgug says.

“Sometimes when you talk, it really pisses me off.” Aguefort says.

“I've realized that. And it seems like a newish thing, but I'm sorry.” Gorgug responds.

“So there were 225 immaculate conceptions?” Fig asks.

Aguefort nods, “In the same day.”

“Was their dad the lute?” Gorgug asks.

“Conjecture holds that it could have been the bard themself or that it could have been the lute.”

“What did the babies look like?” Fabian asks. “Did they have big, round bodies?”

“Like a lute?” Kristen tags on.

Aguefort shakes his head dismissively. “No, no. The children all looked mostly like the species of the parent that took the pregnancy to term, except for they had awesome mohawks or long hair, and some of them were born with denim jean vests.

“Like they came out of the womb?” Fabian asks, trying to understand.

“No pants, just a denim vest?” Fig asks.

“I mean, a baby with pants is a little weird, but a baby with a vest is pretty cool.” Fabian muses.

“And with patches on it already.” Aguefort continues.

“Wow.” Fabian and Kristen say in unison.

“Honestly, fuck the Nightmare King's crown, I want to find one of these babies.” Fabian says.

“Well, you know, on their 18th birthday, they all ascended to the upper planes. It's rumored there is, beyond the 16 outer planes of the Great Wheel, a 17th made of pure rock.” Aguefort says.

“So there's about 250 adult babies flying around on rocks?” Gorgug asks.

Aguefort glares at him again. “Adult babies? They're just adults. Babies grow up. Gorgug, be reasonable.”

Gorgug blushes. “I'm sorry.”

“Use your head.” Aguefort presses.

Gorgug apologizes again as Kristen shakes her head and says “I'm sorry about him.”

“Do they still have the denim vests?” Fig asks.

“I don't think they fit anymore.” Aguefort says.

Fabian follows Fig’s line of thinking, “Yes, is it like their skin? Does it grow with them?”

“The vests grow with them??” Kristen asks.

Riz chimes in, “No, they just had denim vests. It's not part of them.”

Aguefort waves his hands, “Look, I don't have the time to go through every piece of Solace's incredible lore with all of you.”

“Read a book, guys, come on.” Riz says.

“All of this is available in the library if you chose to crack the books at the Adventuring Academy and—” he points at Fig, “—if you attended bard classes, this is in the history of bardic curriculum. What's so weird about a baby born with a vest with a mohawk?!”

“Well.” Gorgug starts.

“That's not the weirdest part, it’s the other part—” Fabian says.

Aguefort looked around the room, confused by the confusion. “225 immaculately conceived babies grew up and went to rock heaven! I don't know how much more clear I can be!”

“They died?” Adaine asks.

Fabian leans over to her. “They ascended. It was the 18th birthday part.”

Fig says, “It kind of sounds a little tragic for the people that gave birth to them.”

Aguefort nods impatiently. “Yes! Many of them were never okay again! There was no warning! There was a rock show, a benefit, on all of their 18th birthdays! Did I mention that not only were they conceived at the same moment, they were born at the same moment.”

“Wow.” Gorgug says.

Kristen nods. “Wow. Yeah, this all checks out.”

Fig says, “Okay, I understand the power of rock now.”

“Good.” Aguefort says.

“But I'm still gonna bring it to the peasants.” she adds.

Adaine tries to get the conversation back on track. “So, if we leave Solace, do we have to then ride horses and stuff?”

“Yeah, should we have a covered wagon?” Kristen asks.

“I'm not leaving The Hangman behind, all right?” Fabian crosses his arms.

Aguefort explains, “Generally, the Solisian council of relations understands that there is a discrepancy. However, it is not uncommon knowledge that our technology and magic far surpasses those of the neighboring realms. There is a general rule to not—” he sighs, “— ‘fracture the domes of those that dwell in the lands beyond’ with how rad our whole deal is,” clearly repeating a rule he has tried to break many times. “But you gotta do what you gotta do. So, at the end of the day, if you want to bring The Hangman, go for it, all right?”

Riz nudges Fabian. “They'll have to catch us first, right, Fabian?”

“Yes, The Ball, that they will,” he replies.

“Remember, laws are a fiction designed to inhibit the powerful.” Aguefort continues.

Fig squints at Riz. “Are you wearing one half of a friendship necklace?”

Riz doesn’t meet her eyes. “It's just a necklace.”

“Is there another?” Gorgug asks.

“It's a regular necklace!” Riz says loudly.

“It's ‘Be Fri’” Kristen reads.

Riz shoves the necklace into his shirt. “And it's not Yuletide Molnur yet, so why are we talking about the other half?”

Kristen turns to the rest of the group. “Hey, I think we should get outta here. We can finally leave.”

“Tonight?” Adaine asks.

“Tonight!” Kristen affirms.

Fig looks to Arthur Aguefort. “I'd like to commission some sort of animal.”

“Commission an animal?” Gorgug repeats, confused.

“Like a painting?” Kristen asks. “Of an animal?”

Aguefort narrows his eyes at Fig. “ I'm sorry, are you asking me to create a brand new, never-before-seen animal?”

“Yes.” Fig says, then adds, “I'll pay you gold.”

“Done.” Aguefort says.

Fig leans back in her chair, “Okay, yeah, instead of my tour bus, I think I'll ride a never-before-seen animal.”

“A big horse.” Gorgug guesses.

“Can we all ride on it?” Riz asks.

Fig crosses her arms. “You guys all have money, you just have to ask—”

Aguefort interrupts her, “You're saying I need to use strange magic to create an animal capable of bearing six people.”

Fig pauses, considering. “Yeah.”

“Into combat.” Fabian adds. “And a motorcycle.”

“It can be like a catbus.” Kristen offers. “Is that copywritten?”

Aguefort turns to Fabian. “Important question about this. Are you going to be on the motorcycle riding the thing or are you and the motorcycle both riding the animal together?”

Fabian shrugs. “I mean, if it's a challenge for you to create an animal in which I can be on a motorcycle on the animal, you know, have at it.”

“Challenge accepted.” Aguefort nods. “I'm going to get to work inventing something truly terrible.”

“You can send the invoice to Lola.” Fig says.

Aguefort nods again. “Very well. Yes, I'll go through your agency.”

“What's her deal?” Kristen asks Fig, now able to ask explicitly.

Fig leans forward. “I don't know, I'm trying to figure it out.”

Kristen says “I don't like these industry types that are kind of like…” Kristen imitates chattering.

“She's very good at her job.” Fig says. “People have tried to get backstage before and she straight up killed them.”

Kristen's eyes get wide. “She killed them? Because they were trying to get backstage?”

Adaine chimes in, “I mean, I've killed a lot of people and that sounds bad.”

“Yeah. I know.” Fig agrees.

“Have I killed anyone?” Kristen wonders.

“Yes.” Adaine answers quickly.

“I did kill our football coach.” Riz says.

Gorgug nods. “It was absolutely tragic.”

Fabian says, “I still think about that. I have nightmares of The Ball standing over Daybreak, gun to his head then bam! It was just everywhere.”

Gorgug steers it back. “So our options are a big animal that replaces a car; a never before seen animal that can hold a motorcycle.” He pauses. “And I just want to throw out, I don't know, maybe my parents could help us tinker up a disguised vehicle, kind of like a hologram-ish thing.”

“I'm also fine riding a horse.” Adaine says. “I grew up in Fallinel. I can ride horses.”

Kristen jumps on the idea. “Yeah, and now that I'm gay, I would prefer a horse.”

“If they're all doing horses—” Fig starts.

Fabian turns to Kristen, “Is that part of it, horses?”

Tracker from the kitchen yells, “Yeah, that's part of it.”

“Okay.” Fabian says, enlightened.

“All the sudden I got in the mail a sourdough starter, horse feed, and really cool boots. Just really cool boots.” Kristen continues.

“They are cool.” Adaine says.

Kristen stands up to show off her boots. “Thank you, thank you, I wear boots. I had sandals on for a while, that's why my dex is negative three, but now I have boots.”

“We should get a druid to awaken your sourdough starter.” Fig says.

Aguefort clears his throat, reminding the party of his presence. “However, I must end with a most dire piece of news. The crown of the Nightmare King has indeed gone missing. It is an ancient and powerful artifact tied to one of the most sinister and powerful villains the world of Spyre has ever known.”

“Who?” Gorgug asks.

“Retrieve— what, who?” Aguefort looking incredulously at Gorgug. “The Nightmare King. The crown of the Nightmare King.”

Kristen shakes her head “Gorgug, Gorgug.”

Fabian shrugs, “I don't know, he could have a name. I'm with Gorgug on this one.”

Aguefort returns to his warning. “This quest to retrieve the crown of the Nightmare King and return it to the Aguefort Adventuring Academy matters more than you know. For not only does its release upon the world represent a threat of a magnitude I cannot describe, but also, it represents 60% of your grade.”

“What?” Fabian asks in shock. Adaine drops her pizza.

“For the entire year.” Aguefort continues.

“What?” Fabian asks again.

“Enjoy your spring break, students, for, indeed, your entire sophomore year depends on it.”

And Arthur Aguefort vanishes.