Chapter Text
“Miss? ‘Cuse me, miss!”
A child squealed for the attention of the thirty-two year old woman sitting behind the volunteer table reading one of her novels. She had not heard the child the first time they had called for her, but the increase in volume certainly caught her attention the second.
Myoui Mina’s ice queen eyes abandoned the pages on her lap and made contact with a pair of baby hazel eyes – they look like honeycombs encaptured in boba , she thought to herself. “Hello, sweetheart. I’m so sorry, I must’ve not heard you the first time. How can I help you?”
“I wanna join the summer program!”
Little hands grabbed excitedly at the rainbow decorated tablecloth and his eyes scanned the items laying on it, focusing on all the prizes, reading logs, bookmarks and coupons.
“Where are your parents, buddy? We need an adult to help us out.”
“But you’re an adult.”
Mina chuckled at the great point he made with his childlike thinking. Her smile widened, causing her eyes to crinkle into crescents and the boy smiled back.When he did so, a beauty mark near his chin revealed itself.
It reminded her of someone she had not seen in forever.
The boy whisper-yelled somewhat loudly, “Mom!” towards the direction of the long, tall bookcases and for a second, Mina was convinced the child was imagining things. It took only a couple minutes for her to be proven wrong once a woman around her age came to stand beside the young boy.
When the woman turned her attention away from the bookcases and focused on the volunteer whom her child was speaking to, a gasp left both of their lips.
“Mina!”
“Chaeyoung.”
Chaeyoung giggled at the awkward situation, hiding her mouth behind her hand in hopes of calming herself down in the quiet library setting but failing. Mina on the other hand bit her bottom lip to prevent herself from joining in and instead focused on the boy who seemed extremely confused as to what was going on.
“Gosh it’s been so long. How have you been?”
Chaeyoung’s face held an almost sad smile and her tapioca boba eyes twinkled with nostalgia. The image before her made Mina realize the uncanny resemblance between the woman and child.
“Good, just working and helping out here whenever I can. How have you been?”
Mina noticed that the little boy’s patience was running thin but Chaeyoung paid him no mind, placing two delicate hands on his tiny shoulders and playfully shaking him. He giggled and was momentarily distracted by the joy from having his mother’s attention – Mina sadly recalled the times she had felt a joy similar to his. Something about the shorter woman paying attention to you made you feel so special .
“Life has definitely been keeping me busy, that’s for sure. I’m sorry by the way – I was looking for these books I’ve been meaning to check out – I hope Jay wasn’t too much of a hassle.”
Mina scoffed and waved her off. “No, not at all. It seems he actually wants to sign up for the summer reading program, but we need a parent’s signature to actually allow him to join.”
“Sweet, let’s get him started. Jay, honey, tell the nice lady your name please.”
With pride, the boy puffed out his chest and spoke up. “Son Minori Jay.”
“What an interesting middle name you have!” Mina complimented as she jotted down the child’s name in the allotted space.
“My mama says it’s for someone she loved before. Says I remind her of that person because she loves me too.” His toothy grin made Mina’s heart melt.
“It’s a play off Minari.” Chaeyoung jumped in to explain her child’s middle name. “His father didn’t like it but I insisted as it relates to abundance and this guy brings us an abundance of joy. Right, Jay?”
Jay nodded his head. Mina’s stomach felt unsettled at the revelation and it was evident in the way her hand shook like a leaf as she continued to write down information. She easily filled in the parent section – she could never forget Chaeyoung even if she tried.
“How old are you, Jay?” Mina asked.
“Four, almost five. Mom says I’m a leo which makes sense because my favorite animal is a lion.”
Mina nodded in agreement and wrote down the boy’s age on the paper – mentally doing the math to realize that the boy was born a bit over a year after the two women had broken up.
After a couple more routine questions, the paper was turned to face Chaeyoung and the Japanese woman held out a pen for her to use. When Chaeyoung reached for the pen, their fingers brushed and Mina’s pale cheeks blushed with the lightest pink shade. Despite the several years passing, she couldn’t ignore the physical effect the younger woman still had on her. Twelve years ago her physical attraction towards the graphic designer started and it was crazy to think that six years had passed since they last saw each other, but one touch brought back so many memories.
After signing at the bottom of the page, Chaeyoung pointed the pen towards the diamond ring resting (almost weighing down) on Mina’s ring finger. She didn’t have to outright ask the question as Mina already started scrambling to find an explanation.
“Oh. Oh!” Mina played with the ring on her finger with her other hand and chuckled nervously. “I got married almost two years ago.”
Chaeyoung’s lips formed an O and she nodded, shaking the short, shaggy black hair on her head.
“Who’s the lucky girl?”
“Im Nayeon.”
“The popular psych major? Didn’t she have a class with Tzuyu or something?”
Mina tucked strands of her long, onyx hair behind her ears and nodded her head shyly. Everyone described Im Nayeon that way, now and in college. She was the type to attract attention wherever she went, flirting and easing into conversation like a professional. Part of her charm had worked on the sweet, heartbroken Myoui Mina. It was an interesting match – the introvert and extrovert – but like any typical “opposites attract” story, it balanced out.
“And you?” Mina’s eyes briefly looked over the other woman’s hands for a ring but she found nothing. A part of her felt relieved – guiltily – and a part of her felt ashamed that she enjoyed the view. Even when they were younger, Mina would always compliment Chaeyoung’s hands and she spent hours kissing the tips of her fingers like a lovesick fool.
“Zion and I are separated.” At the mention of his father, Jay’s small lips turned upside down into a frown and he looked back up at his mother with the fondest eyes. Mina knew they shared a pain she could not fully comprehend.
His name brought a bitter taste in Mina’s mouth as Zion was the man that Chaeyoung had left her for. The wicked man had whispered into the pretty girl’s ears promises of adventure, chaos and freedom and at that age, that was all young Son Chaeyoung had craved. Mina tried to assure her that the security she was working to provide for them both would guarantee those things as well, but Chaeyoung was as free of a bird as the one painted into her skin and she left behind a five year relationship without looking back.
“I’m sorry.” Mina apologized but she could not tell who she was actually apologizing to. Both sets of eyes stared at her as if she had picked up their broken pieces and placed them together. Her words and presence carried care and sympathy, a craving that both Chaeyoung and her son shared. In those two words they found solace and both let out a sigh in sync.
“Listen, whenever you’re free, we should catch up. Little man has soccer practice every Monday and Friday afternoon, but I am my own boss now so my schedule can easily move around to accommodate yours. How does next Fri-”
“Hey, baby!” Nayeon interrupted Chaeyoung in a volume that would normally not be allowed in the library but since she was their best volunteer’s wife, they turned a blind eye. She greeted her spouse with an exaggerated kiss on the side of her head and a hug, pressing herself into Mina’s frame as if to mold them together.
Instead of the snowy blonde hair Nayeon had during their undergraduate experience, there was an auburn shade painted into her mid length strands of hair. Chaeyoung knew that the woman was significantly older than herself, but the graphic designer felt envious at how youthful the woman looked. On her finger was an even bigger diamond than Mina’s which shone brightly, bragging that she won over the stellar woman and wore a huge ring to signify that.
The Japanese woman smiled at the sight of Nayeon’s adorable big eyes and signature bunny-like grin on full display, making her heart swell. Her wife’s grin got even bigger when she finally saw the sweet boy standing in front of the table and she cooed.
“Hello, sweetheart! Are you excited to start the summer reading program?”
Nayeon moved from Mina’s side to stand behind her more and the latter stayed quiet, leaning back against her wifey’s body for support and watching the interaction happening. She observed how stuck Chaeyoung looked at that moment. Normally, Mina was accustomed to people being in a stupor whenever her wife was near – people admired her wifey’s beauty all the time, but she could tell that her ex lover’s eyes were doing the exact opposite. Her disdain was barely hidden and her chocolate brown eyes did not leave Nayeon until Jay let out a loud giggle at something the woman had said to him.
“He’s so cute – you must be so proud.”
Nayeon’s eyes went from Jay to Chaeyoung, winking at the woman for a job well done.
“T-thank you.”
“Of course.”
Nayeon’s focus went back to her gorgeous wife as her nails scratched lightly into the fabric of her sweater, leaving faint marks on her skin and causing the woman to stare into her eyes with a hazy look. Leave it to Nayeon to tease her whenever she can – even if that meant in front of Mina’s ex and said ex’s son.
“Baby, I told Jihyo and Sana we would meet them at the hibachi place for Kiko’s birthday lunch. Are you going to be ready soon?”
Park-Minatozaki Kiko was Mina and Nayeon’s goddaughter and today was her third birthday. Of course, the two women took their roles seriously and insisted on taking the family out for lunch to celebrate the sweet angel.
There was no doubt that the child was a Park-Minatozaki, but at three years old Kiko was already picking up on her dramatic godmother’s mannerisms. It drove Jihyo absolutely insane but made Sana laugh, sharing with Mina that if Kiko was any prediction of what the other couple’s child would be like, then Mina was in for some trouble.
“Jihyo and Sana had a baby?!” Chaeyoung exclaimed, jumping into the conversation out of shock at this new information.
Nayeon’s perfectly shaped eyebrow arched upon hearing that this random woman knew of her friends and she glanced away from her wife to truly examine her. She would have assumed by now that the woman would have walked away to let the two wives have a conversation but clearly she wanted to stay.
“Do you know them?” Mina recognized Nayeon’s chirpy tone as a sign of annoyance and she gulped. The volunteer knew that right now her wife was analyzing Chaeyoung, utilizing her professional skills to gain some insight on the connection between the two.
“Chaeyoung shared some classes with Jihyo and we were all in one big friend group during undergrad.” Mina joined the conversation, trying to explain as quickly and as little as possible about the visitor.
“How come I have never met you before?”
It was an accusatory question and its weight felt heavier than the arm wrapped around Mina’s ballerina waist. Chaeyoung’s eyes drifted down to the possessive action – clearly someone was marking their territory.
“Being a mom sadly keeps you too busy to make up for lost time with friends.”
By now, Jay ran away to the play area to get away from the boring adult conversation his mother was having. He left her all alone to defend herself against the questioning gaze in Nayeon’s eyes and she stood there awkwardly without the little human shield.
Nayeon hummed, obviously not impressed with the answer but letting it be. Her manicured hand rested at Mina’s hip now and two of her fingers slipped underneath the thin material of her sweater to caress silky soft skin.
“Kiko. That’s their daughter’s name and she just so happens to be our goddaughter.”
Mina shared, hoping to push this conversation towards a conclusion so she could escape the tension. She could feel the heat radiating off of Nayeon’s body and she knew that the woman was one second away from claiming her in the middle of the library for Chaeyoung to watch. She was a psychologist after all and by now, she must’ve put the pieces together of who this woman was to her wife.
“Wow. It feels like just yesterday Jihyo was drooling over Sana during parties. Speaking of parties, how’s Momo doing?”
She recalled the numerous times Jihyo would look like an awkward mess trying to keep her cool whenever Momo and Mina’s friend from Japan came close to her.
“She’s good. Her and Dahyun are getting married soon.”
“Oh, Dahyun didn’t tell me that.”
Nayeoun leaned her head on Mina’s shoulder and stood patiently beside her, waiting for the perfect time to interrupt. She didn’t like that the two shared history and she noticed the way her wife tried to lean out of her hold as if the mere thought of standing in front of this random woman with her wife felt scandalous .
“It’s in September of next year. I’ll talk to her and see if she will send an invite.”
“Thanks.” Chaeyoung cleared her throat and shot a glance Nayeon’s way before awkwardly smiling. “I should let you two go. It was great to catch up with you Mina and lovely to meet you, Im.”
“Im- Myoui .”
“Ah, lovely to meet you.”
✧༺♥༻∞
Several years ago…
“Excuse me.”
A timid voice interrupted Mina’s reading time from behind the volunteer table but she didn’t dare stop until she reached the end of the page. She took her time for fear of losing her place in the book, finding use of the bookmark Jeongyeon gifted her as she slotted it between the next pages.
Mina’s eyes met the softest boba eyes she had ever seen. In front of the table, amidst the bustling crowd of professors and students at the library, stood a familiar tiger cub named Chaeyoung. The younger university student was someone Mina knew from a shared friend group where they barely interacted and solely said hi due to having mutuals.
Chaeyoung wore baggy oversized cargo pants, worn out Nike dunks that Mina could swear have seen better days, and a black cropped top with a black widow in white paint covering the whole cotton material. Her hair was shaggy and messy with platinum blonde coloring and spots of black dye – Sana had referred to the new hair color as “oreo” which Mina guessed was the newest trend.
“Hey! It’s Mina, right?”
The straight line on the tiger cub’s lips turned into an almost shy smile and she waved her hand like the older student was not literal inches in front of her. There was an excitement buzzing from her and it made Mina realize that maybe losing a couple minutes of reading time was fine if she got to talk to someone as good looking as the girl in front of her.
Mina hummed in confirmation then looked at the book that Chaeyoung held out for her.
“I came here to donate this book and the librarian said to go to you. Hope that’s okay?”
“More than okay. Thanks so much for donating!”
The mathematics major took the hardcover from Chaeyoung’s hand, inspecting its condition to see whether it made the cut or not. She started this volunteer job as a way to get out of her apartment as the only times she left were for classes, the occasional hangout with friends, and to read at the library.
One day, another volunteer named Jeongyeon had caught her attention and offered for her to gain some community service hours for their university’s volunteer requirement. It worked perfectly with her schedule and plus, she would get first dibs on any of the books she had been eyeing. The volunteer work was a set routine – take the book, inspect it for damages, write down the condition and then offer the student a voucher for a free ice cream cone or chicken sandwich. Pretty simple.
“Ice cream or chicken sandwich?”
Her thin delicate hands placed the book into the donation bin behind her chair and then grabbed one of each voucher, holding them up for Chaeyoung to decide. She held off on giggling when she saw the younger girl’s tongue poking out from between her teeth as she thought deeply of which voucher she wanted.
If she were to ask Mina for her opinion, Mina would share that she had done the math on which was a better deal and concluded that it was the chicken sandwich. But she definitely didn’t want to interrupt the woman, especially because it gave her a chance to really examine the tattoos scattered along all of her exposed skin.
“How about instead of the voucher I get to take the pretty girl volunteering out on a date?”
Mina’s face felt hot and her eyes widened to the size of saucers as she was clearly shocked by the proposal.
“Well, I definitely don’t have a voucher for that.” She joked, stalling as she tried to rewire her brain that was freaking out. She wanted to scream and call Momo to share the news but on the outside she remained as cool as a cucumber.
Chaeyoung chuckled at her joke and placed her hands on the wooden table, leaning her weight forward on her tattoo scattered arms. Mina could see the little outlines of muscle that made the pieces of artwork move subtly and she gulped at the sight.
Maybe it was the good girl in her – the ballerina with the perfect GPA who did everything her parents asked of her – but she always found rebellious women like Chaeyoung attractive. However, her dating history said otherwise because in the end, she always picked the safest choice for fear of heartbreak.
“If you don’t want to, that’s totally fine too. Just don’t tell Jeongyeon or Tzuyu, they will never ever let me live it down.”
Mina shook her head which Chaeyoung interpreted as a no. She shrunk just slightly into a smaller version of herself and Mina quickly thought of something to fix the wrongful assumption.
“NO!” She practically screamed in the obviously quiet library. “No, I would love to. I was just shocked you were asking me. ”
“Sweet. I’ll pick you up at 8 on Friday.”
✧༺♥༻∞
Myoui Mina just completed her two year mathematics master’s program when Son Chaeyoung stomped on her heart. Her girlfriend had given her the courtesy of waiting until the day after her graduation to break the news. Pretending to enjoy the university’s celebratory ceremony and sitting at her girlfriend’s graduation party as if she didn’t know already that their relationship was ending. It was painful and cruel.
Now, crying into the familiar embrace of Im Nayeon, laid a worn out and frail version of Mina. She was broken – her throat was raw from the sobs that she struggled to choke out, her body even thinner than before, and her eyes were red from the endless tears that left her. Her body was shaking as if it were below freezing in Nayeon’s apartment but neither could tell if it was actually from the amount of weight she lost or if she was getting sick from all of the neglect.
“Nayeon, it hurts so much ,” she confided, mumbling into the older woman’s long sleeve shirt. Warm hands were on her upper back tracing patterns in an attempt to calm her down and provide comfort. She sniffled, smelling the honey citrus scent of Nayeon’s perfume hidden in the material of her shirt and on her skin. While it wasn’t the usual musky scent combined with a little cannabis and acrylic paint, Mina did not find it displeasing.
“How can I help you feel better, baby? You’re too precious to be hurting as much as you are.”
Nayeon's chest ached at the image of Mina in her arms. When she pulled back just slightly, her hands went to cup the mathematician's angelic face and draw circles on her sharp cheekbones. Mina’s eyes kept closed but they fluttered at every delicate touch. If she were to open her eyes, she knew she would cry harder because she could feel the love emanating off the psychology major through her actions and words.
Mina forgot what love felt like as it had been weeks since Chaeyoung left and she began to doubt whether it even existed in this cruel world. When dark chocolate eyes met honeycombs, Mina’s prediction was right; empathy oozed from the other’s expression and it caused the Japanese woman to let out the faintest whimper. Nayeon screamed of safety and empathy.
Nayeon had caught the sound and it broke her heart into two. She clucked her tongue and shook her head as her chest filled with rage towards whoever hurt the beautiful woman in her arms.
“Make me forget her. Please, Nayeon .”
For Im Nayeon, those were magical words.
Since the first day the Korean met the Japanese girl during her senior year of high school, Nayeon had a crush on shy, introverted Myoui Mina. All she ever wanted was a chance with the girl, finding her gummy smile to die for, her hair something she wanted to run her hands through and her soul something she wanted to protect for forever.
If she had heard that plea without the reference of Mina’s ex, it would have been a victory for her. To make Mina feel good, to help her out in any way was something she would do in a heartbeat but that didn’t make it sting any less. Another woman made an idiotic mistake and it gave Nayeon this opportunity but it’s only because Mina was hurting. She did not know who Mina’s ex girlfriend was – the woman liked to keep her relationship as private as possible and they didn’t become close until recently. However, this didn’t stop Nayeon from wishing the mystery woman hell because Mina deserved the world and more.
Now wasn’t the time to enjoy this moment out of selfishness, but instead a moment for her to showcase her blinding loyalty to the shaking woman sitting almost in her lap in the middle of her college apartment.
“Of course, princess. How do you want me to do that?”
Nayeon had an idea of what Mina meant, but she wanted the woman to confirm it herself. They would be crossing a line they never have before and she was apprehensive about being the one who took the first step to do so.
Pale, fragile hands took her own from the beautiful masterpiece that was her face to place them at her waist. Simultaneously, she used her body weight to push Nayeon back to lay on the baby blue comforter. There was no resistance from the older woman and when Mina’s small body straddled her hips with her thighs locking Nayeon into place, she just watched patiently. There was no rush and she allowed Mina the opportunity to set the pace. Mina looked down at the woman laying flat on the bed through her eyelashes and Nayeon could see the apprehension hidden behind her dark brown orbs.
It was a little endearing how shy Mina suddenly became but Nayeon stayed still, reminding herself that it was the woman’s request, her plea, and she had to wait patiently for her directions.
“Touch me, please.” Mina whined, grinding her hips down into the older woman’s lap and tugging at the strings of her sweatpants. Nayeon’s shirt had slid up when she was being pushed down and Mina’s eyes were fixated on the exposed milky white skin of her stomach. She never looked at Nayeon in that way before – of course she knew the woman was attractive – but she couldn’t help being enthralled at how tempting that sliver of skin looked to her now.
“Anything for you, baby.”
In an instant, Nayeon used her core strength to switch their positions so that she was hovering over Mina, using her arms at either side of the onyx haired woman’s head to hold her weight up. Those sparkly eyes that Nayeon would admire whenever she had the chance to see them up close were staring up at her behind a glossy sheen formed from tears. Her pupils were dilated but they spoke of trust and need, almost begging for Nayeon to let her feel anything other than pain.
A part of Nayeon wanted to stop right there – the situation played with her insecurities of being wanted on a surface level only, fearing she knew that she was just being used but allowing it anyways. But another greater part of Nayeon knew that it was rare for Mina to ask for a favor, especially like this one, and she must hold at least a fraction of affection for the Korean woman if she asked her out of their whole friend group. Maybe it was not the kind of affection to insinuate or lead to a relationship, but one where she could allow for them to both enjoy this moment of Nayeon ravishing her.
Hesitantly, Nayeon pressed her nose against the woman’s neck and took in the sweet lavender scent soaked into Mina’s skin. There was a brief gasp that escaped from the woman’s lips and another came once Nayeon pressed her plush lips against her pulse point, feeling the flutter of her heartbeat.
Her kisses became bolder as Mina opened her legs and wrapped them around Nayeon’s hips, pulling hers closer. Tongues intertwined, teeth clashed and marks were left on both of the women’s bodies but all hell broke loose once Nayeon’s long, slim fingers toyed with the waistband of Mina’s leggings.
A whimper left the Japanese woman’s lips and she pushed with her own hand on Nayeon’s wrist, urging her to slide past the material and touch her where she needed her most.
As she did what her princess wanted her to do, curling her fingers and exploring velvet walls, Nayeon watched the adorable nose scrunch that appeared on her face or the focused furrow of her brows when Nayeon added another finger.
She sounded so pretty – like music to her ears and every whimper or gasp made Nayeon’s heart fill with pride.
Encouraging her to be louder and to let go (in more ways than one), Nayeon watched as Mina’s hips bucked up to meet her fingers and match their pace. She chased her own high, digging her nails into Nayeon’s forearm and leaning her head up to capture her lips to muffle her sounds.
After Mina’s first orgasm, Nayeon brought her fingers to her lips and tasted the juices that leaked onto her fingers. Licking them one by one, she moaned at how sweet Mina tasted. It beat her imagination and she knew she wanted to try for herself.
That night, Nayeon fell asleep lying between the woman she love’s legs. Her head rested on Mina’s soft thigh and her arms curled around her other leg, cuddling into the mathematicians' body.
When they woke up the next morning, Mina returned the favor. After that, she never really thought of leaving the safety of Nayeon and or her apartment.
They started dating six months later.
✧༺♥༻∞
The atmosphere in Nayeon’s range rover was silent. Neither woman knew what to say about what had happened at the library. The two had the faintest idea of the effect the person there had on their relationship, but neither knew how to talk about it right in that moment.
Unbeknownst to Mina, Nayeon had seen the woman at the library before and recognized her. It was when she was cleaning out their first apartment – she did not mean to stumble upon Mina’s old photo album or invade her personal belongings, but she just so happened to find it. It was in a box tucked away in the mathematician's closet which she had asked Nayeon to clear out as she was busy with conferences.Inside of that box were handwritten letters, pieces of artwork, photos and other little momentos. The letters were signed with ‘ <3 Chaeyoung ’, the photos showcased a girl with a ridiculous amount of tattoos holding Mina, and the artwork was signed to Mina as well.
In one of the letters Nayeon took note of the date written at the top and later on she realized that this was the woman who broke Mina’s heart. She accidentally found evidence of the woman who brought Mina to her – the reason why Nayeon was the one who now held Mina at night, made love to her, came home to her and all the other blessings Nayeon had prayed for for years. Because Nayeon had found all of this in such a secretive, hidden spot, the psychologist felt a little self conscious of herself and their relationship. She began to question whether Mina had ever gotten over this girl and if she even helped her forget her when they first slept together.
Nayeon was an attractive woman – she caught the eye of every person she walked past, multiple people confessed their love to her and she was always told how she could’ve been a star with her beauty. But it was moments like these, where she was doubting her relationship, that she felt the ugliest. That night she realized she was naive for thinking that her long-term girlfriend was over her past relationship, especially because Nayeon was there to pick up the pieces, but now it seemed that Mina was just good at hiding it.
Mina came home the next day to Nayeon absentmindedly sipping wine on the couch while watching one of her favorite reality tv shows. It seemed like any other evening for the couple so Mina never questioned why her girlfriend was especially quiet that day. She just acted like it was any other day.
Now, Nayeon’s hands gripped the steering wheel aggressively and her teeth bit into her cheek – a habit she had when she was attempting to hold herself back from asking a parade of questions or saying something she would regret. Mina’s silence – for the first time ever – was irritating her and she felt it suffocating her as if to push her back and say not yet . It was never the right time though and that frustrated Nayeon the most.
( Not when she found the hidden belongings. Not when they spent the night after she proposed sharing stories of their pasts. Not even after they said I do and commemorated their wedding night at the seaside .)
Meanwhile, Mina played with her hands resting on her lap, feeling the tension in the car and recognizing the telltale signs that her wife was irritated.
- Nayeon’s hand was not on her thigh, teasing her and squeezing the muscular flesh as she drove them to their destination.
- The music wasn’t playing any louder than a volume of 10 decibels and Mina struggled to make out what song was playing from Nayeon’s spotify playlist.
- Her wife did not ask about her day as she typically would.
- Nayeon’s eyes did not drift to her at any of the red lights they came across. She was frozen – in a comatose state – and all she could see was the road.
“We’re here.”
Nayeon grumbled before parking her car and hopping out of it. She did not bother to open the door or wait for her wife and began to walk towards the front of the restaurant where Jihyo and Sana stood with their daughter in the latter’s arms..
Because her wife was wearing significantly taller heels, Mina struggled to keep up and followed a couple of paces behind her. When she did catch up, Nayeon placed some distance between them and utilized her goddaughter as a shield. The child was happy as a pig in a blanket to see her favorite godmother and was a much needed distraction which Nayeon had stolen from Sana’s arms before leading the group to the hostess stand.
Finding the older woman’s behavior quite odd, Jihyo shot a worried look in Mina’s direction to which she shook her head back to stop the woman from asking any questions. Sana, Mina’s best friend for almost their whole lives, squeezed her shoulder sympathetically. She knew the other Japanese woman had caught on to their low energy and as the peacekeeper of the group, she made her wife sit beside her in between the two so that they could give each other some space.
The ladies jumped into a conversation about work and as time went on, they all noticed how Nayeon paid more attention to the babbling that came from Kiko than the conversation with the adults. Most of the time she was responding to the child rather than her friends or wife and if her eyes left the child for a second, it was to ask the server for more water or a particular menu item for Kiko to try.
“What happened?” Sana asked in Japanese, leaning closer to her best friend in hopes of Nayeon not hearing their conversation.
“We saw Chaeyoung.”
“What?! How? Does Nayeon even know who Chaeyoung is?”
Mina sighed and looked at her wife, examining her body language to see if that would give her any clue. “Possibly. I don’t recall ever telling her, but we’ve been together for quite some time so maybe it’s slipped out before?”
“I would be upset too if I was her. I don’t know, Mitang, I have told you from the start it wasn’t good to hold this back from Nayeon. She’s got a soft, mushy heart and I don’t doubt that seeing you with your first love didn’t sting a bit.”
Mina nodded and went back to playing with the assortment of veggies on her plate. She could not stomach anything and she noticed that her wife didn’t even attempt to pick up her fork. All she did was pepper Kiko’s face with kisses, filling the dining room with the harmonious giggles of the beautiful little girl.
The two had discussed having kids before when they were asked to be godparents. Nayeon expressed her interest in carrying their future child, going on and on about which features of Mina’s she wanted the child to have. It was something she apparently thought of before, sharing with her new wife that she wanted a daughter who could look up to their friends’ child.
Mina never really thought of having a family and was perfectly content with just Nayeon, but she pretended to put thought into it once she saw how interested Nayeon was. Using the excuse of a possible bump in salary if she dedicated more time to work, Mina was able to push back the impending final conversation about having kids for later. It was every time they saw Kiko though that Mina noticed the maternal nature of her wife and how she could tell the woman was aching to have her own.
Nayeon had always taken care of everyone around her and despite having a very teasing almost bullying personality, the Korean woman was quick to jump in to help and guide her friends. She had that instinct to protect, to teach and to aid and that’s part of what Mina loved so much about her. However, the Japanese woman couldn’t deny the fact that the constant visits with Kiko were making the other feel anxious and skeptical about Mina’s actual stance on children.
Her time was running out and with the addition of Chaeyoung, Mina could only assume that she was walking on thin ice on borrowed time.
✧༺♥༻∞
“Sana’s gonna kill me if she smells this shit on me.”
Jihyo broke the silence as she and Nayeon stood at the back entrance of the restaurant with cigarettes hanging from their lips.
Nayeon only scoffed then tapped some of the ash off the butt of the cigarette. They both stared into the parking lot and the random groups of people walking around the area but neither felt the need to rush to talk about what was wrong, especially not Nayeon.
When her lungs started to feel scratchy and her throat burned just slightly, Nayeon dropped the cigarette onto the sidewalk and crushed it with her heel. Jihyo watched the action and raised an eyebrow at the audible stomp Nayeon made when doing so.
“So, are you going to tell me what happened?”
Nayeon dragged her eyes away from the crushed cigarette and stared at her best friend with an angry furrow in between her eyebrows. She was always vocal, always the loud and opinionated friend but for some reason she wanted to stay silent.
How do you admit that you have held someone who didn’t want to be in your arms? How does someone as confident as Nayeon admit that every day she was scared that if she stepped out of line her wife would leave her for someone else? How does she tell Jihyo she always felt like her relationship was just temporary? Not because she didn’t want it, but because she could tell Mina was waiting for someone to come save her. And she met that someone today.
“My wife is still in love with her ex.”
Once those words left Nayeon’s plush lips, Jihyo winced and from Nayeon’s peripheral she could see the physical grimace her best friend made. It was a sign that while Jihyo didn’t like it, she knew about it and Nayeon could only assume it was Sana who told her. Mina and Sana had a loyalty that rivaled the loyalty between Nayeon and Jihyo, but either couple tried their best not to be too involved in each other’s drama.
“What’s your opinion of Chaeyoung?”
“If she didn’t have her kid with her, I would totally think she was an irresponsible dropout or something.”
Jihyo nodded her head and killed her cigarette.
“She’s always given off those vibes, even when we were in school.”
“Jihyo, do you know anything about Chaeyoung and Mina that I should be aware of?” Nayeon turned to fully face the shorter woman and crossed her arms over her chest insecurely. “I can’t go in blind anymore – my whole relationship has been me wearing blinders happily and now if I continue to do so, I will be an even bigger fool.”
“Listen…Mina is a loyal woman, nothing will happen.”
“That does not answer my question. And if the loyalty is out of complacency rather than love, maybe I don’t want that for myself.”
After that, Nayeon stomped back into the restaurant and left Jihyo alone to figure out whether she should share with Sana that Nayeon now knows who Mina’s ex is.
✧༺♥༻∞
When they arrived home, Nayeon tiredly kicked off her heels at the front door and walked into the kitchen to pour herself a glass of wine. Mina was left alone by the entrance, observing how Nayeon’s shoulders were slumped and every step she took elicited a deep sigh. Exhaustion settled into both of their bodies and mechanically, they went through their evening routine of putting away dishes together, preparing breakfast for the next morning and putting their living room blankets in the dryer to warm while they freshened up.
Typically the two would share a shower – under Nayeon’s excuse of saving water and the planet – but Mina slipped into the shower by herself, assuming that her wife did not want anyone to be near her at that moment.
A hiss escaped her lips at the hot water hitting her bare back and she reached for the handle to lower the temperature. She stood there in the way of the showerhead, feeling the water cascade down her body while her mind raced from seeing the woman who broke her heart to letting her wife get upset over it. She knew she wasn’t being the best partner by staying silent, but it was overwhelming. Two powerful forces in her life merging and attacking her simultaneously – it was too much to handle.
The sound of the shower curtain being pulled back broke her trance and she was shocked to watch Nayeon step into the shower behind her.
Arms that have held her numerous times before wrapped themselves around her from behind and she stared at the ivory skin pressed against her own. Instead of the warmth of the water, Mina felt the heat emanating from Nayeon’s body.
“Are we okay?” Mina asked her wife in a hushed whisper.
“I hope so, but I think you need a reminder.”
One of Nayeon’s hands reached up to push away some of her wet hair and pressed a kiss to the exposed skin between her neck and shoulder.
“A reminder?” Mina was lost.
“Of who has stayed beside you all this time and loved you, worshiped you and owned you.” Each point came with a pressed kiss to her skin but the last part concluded with a sharp bite at the side of her neck, piercing into soft skin like a needle. “It’s my name that is on every paper you sign. It’s my hard work that paid for this house. It’s my arms that get to hold you while you fall asleep every night. You belong to me. ”
Mina’s core clenched at the thought of being a possession – to be desired, chosen and owned. In the back of her mind she knew that Nayeon already did those things, making her feel like the number one choice when others in her life didn’t or left. But it was times like these where she realized just how much Nayeon knew her and her love for being picked, protected and played with.
Nayeon’s powerful front teeth nipped at her earlobe while her hands palmed at her hips, splaying her long slender fingers against the skin of her lower body to take up as much space as possible. The tips of her fingers laid at the tops of her thighs or closer to her pubic area but the area she wanted Nayeon to be near the most remained untouched.
“Nayeon,” she moaned as the woman’s lips cascaded from her neck down to her shoulder, following the trail of water droplets that fell. She knew that her wife was taking her sweet time and enjoyed how much agony she was already in.
“Princess, I don’t want to hear one peep from you. Bad girls don’t get to say anything.”
Nayeon spun Mina around so that she was facing her. Mina saw that there was no smug grin on her lover’s face at all but a frown.
Letting out a frustrated groan, Nayeon’s hands traveled up Mina’s body to her breasts which she squeezed gently. Out of the command spoken earlier, Mina suppressed a moan and sank her teeth into her bottom lip while Nayeon’s fingers pinched and pulled on her nipples.
Her wife’s lips were back on her skin, leaving a hot path of bites along her collarbone. It was a feature of Mina’s body that Nayeon worshiped so much and right now it was no different.
So many minutes passed where that’s all Nayeon did and Mina began to feel desperate, acknowledging how her hips would buck up in hopes of finding the other’s thigh to ride but failing miserably. Her wife watched as she pouted at the lack of contact, snickering at how every tug or bite made Mina clench her thighs together or frown deeper.
The impromptu shower sex by no means replaced the conversation they were supposed to have, but it offered an olive branch that both wives could take to ensure that their connection was still intact. It was in the molding of their bodies together that they first started dating and if that was the necessary reminder to open Mina’s eyes to what really matters, Nayeon did her best to help her declutter her mind.
✧༺♥༻∞
“It’s too late, Chaeyoung.”
Tears cascaded down the slopes of Mina’s sharp cheekbones in a stream of angel tears.
The ex lovers sat side by side at a bench in a nearby park but neither looked at the other, refusing to make eye contact as they had this heavy conversation. It was inevitable that they finally got the closure their relationship deserved and Mina had to be the one to say the magic words.
“You left me. Broke me and tore me apart like the time we spent together meant nothing . It took me forever to get over you and even when I was dating again, all I thought of was you and what you were doing. I was so selfish to everyone who loved me that I hurt them by constantly searching for you when I had the answer to my prayers in front of me.”
Chaeyoung’s bottom lip trembled and she dug her short nails into the flesh of her thigh to prevent herself from crying. She listened as Mina poured alcohol onto her wound – the wound that she created for herself a long time ago.
“I would have chased you to the ends of the earth if I didn’t have people surrounding me and reminding me what I was worth. You made me question if I deserved security, vulnerability and happiness because you were so quick to leave. It ruined me when you didn’t reach out – hell, I didn’t even need an apology. I just wanted to know that you were okay, that you were alive but you couldn’t even give me that.”
Mina took a deep breath before she prepared for the next part.
“Nayeon and I have decided to have a child. That child will be surrounded by everyone we know, but I don’t want to risk the chance that you being in their life could cause them to adopt abandonment issues too. I’m sorry, but I have to protect what’s mine and I don’t want you in the way. I deserve this.”
“Mina, I am so sorry.”
Chaeyoung’s voice was like a scolded child – it felt like she was seconds away from throwing a tantrum because she wasn’t getting her way. Despite the mature ink on her skin and the tired bags under her eyes, Mina recognized the behavior of the overly reckless endangerment that was a young, wild and free Chaeyoung. She never truly changed even after having her son and Mina frowned at the revelation.
“Sorry doesn’t give us a time machine. Sorry does not erase the pain. I will not abandon my wife for someone who probably would leave again if given another chance at freedom. I love Nayeon and you will not ruin that for me, Chaeyoung.”
“Mina, please I don’t want thi-”
“And I didn’t want you to leave me six years ago, but you did without glancing back.”
And with that, Mina stood up from the bench and headed back home. Not once did she glance back to see the woman still sitting on the bench with uncontrollable sobs. She had a future to think of and for once, it didn’t involve Chaeyoung.
✧༺♥༻∞
In a private vineyard in the South of France, famous actress Kim Dahyun married her equally famous partner Hirai Momo. Both were tired of the incessant cameras and fans that surrounded them on a daily basis and preferred to host their wedding ceremony as a private event with some of their closest friends and family.
The whole group was there as part of the bridal party – Tzuyu, Sana, Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Nayeon and Mina – and each of the women stood beside the couple as the two shared their romantic, heartfelt vows. Tears welled in their eyes and grins adorned their faces from ear to ear when the newlyweds sealed the deal with a kiss at the altar.
At the two brides’ announcement that it was time to party, everyone made a beeline into the ancient chateau to celebrate. Champagne flutes in everyone’s hands, live classical music in the background, a DJ preparing for the actual dance floor, and a buffet table full of food.
Nayeon and Mina had taken a seat with their daughter sitting on the older Korean woman’s lap, bouncing the little two year old as Mina attempted to feed her some of the fruits from the buffet’s charcuterie. The couple were smiling at each other as if it were their own wedding, sharing soft touches and loving whispers.
Nayeon’s hair was longer, flowing past the middle of her back and almost covering all of the skin that was exposed from her silky mint green bridesmaid dress. Her face looked lighter, more youthful as if the past didn’t weigh heavily on her conscious anymore. Her smile was still so bright and now that her daughter was the main reason for that, Mina fell even more in love with it. Within the past year, she had not only tackled motherhood, but opened up another business which was set to be acquired from one of the top performers within the tech industry. Everything was pointed towards early retirement and blissful days of being with her family.
Mina’s hair was cut short near the end of her jawline and her wife loved the wolf cut so much that it was difficult for her to leave the house every day for work – Nayeon would insist on several kisses goodbye and then somehow Mina’s clothes would be falling to the floor as Nayeon showed her just how much she loved her haircut.
Her bare back was on full display because of the style change but no one complained to see the muscles on display while she wore a matching dress. Her face had not aged either and despite the long nights she spent staying up with their daughter, she looked as if she was never behind on sleep. She was a professor at two of the top universities in South Korea and in addition to those roles, she was traveling around the world to share new mathematical theories that she was researching. It provided her a balance between making a great amount of money, seeing the world and spending time with her family.
As her eyes gleamed at the sight of her wife peppering kisses along their baby girl’s face, she leaned forward to intercept one causing Nayeon to giggle against her lips.
“Baby, that was for Tora!”
“Sorry, sweetie but mama wanted some love too.”
Mina apologized to her daughter who only giggled along with her mother and clapped her little chubby hands together. Nayeon mimicked the motion and encouraged her daughter to do it again.
Around the couple, kids – including Kiko – ran and played while the adults caught up with others.When she looked at the crowd, Mina noticed the way Jihyo held Sana’s pregnant belly and kissed her cheek fondly. She noticed the way Momo and Dahyun were still attached at the hip, chuckling with family members and squeezing each other’s hands. She noticed how Jeongyeon leaned back in her chair while her wife leaned over her shoulder to kiss her cheek and how Tzuyu alongside her boyfriend pretended to barf at the affection.
Lastly, her eyes landed on the woman sitting in the corner with a young boy on her lap. She recognized those eyes that scanned the room searching for something. A part of Mina wanted to look away and avoid them altogether, but then a part of her wanted Chaeyoung to see that she had meant business. However, her wife lightly poked Mina’s leg with her foot to get her attention.
“Mina, could you go grab some more fruits for Tora please?”
“Oh my, you already ate all of your plate. Your little tummy is so strong.” She cooed at the child before grabbing the empty plate from her wife, pressing a quick kiss onto her forehead.
Nayeon smiled at the action and went back to spoiling their daughter with her attention while her mama went to replenish her snacks.
At the table, she picked up as many grapes as she could along with strawberries and peaches as she noted how much her daughter loved those. She was paying no mind to those around her until a fragile hand barely touched the crook of her elbow, causing her to look over to her side.
Chaeyoung gave her a quick smile before gasping at the sight of thin black ink etched into Mina’s petite wrist.
虎
“Wow, Mina the perfect girl with the perfect skin got a tattoo?! What’s that for?”
“My daughter Tora.”
“Tora?” Chaeyoung tilted her head, looking puzzled at the significance of her daughter’s middle name.
“It means tiger in Japanese.”