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It's a blistering hot summer Sunday and there are more fans plugged into the Megido residence than there are at a Fall Out Boy concert. The windows are shut tightly, so that the two young women could avoid the blast from hell that calls itself a breeze. The elder of the twins is still sprawled out across her bed-sheets, not wanting to pull herself from the drama she'd been playing out in her head. Soon enough, her alarm would do it for her and she would never find out if dream Damara would marry dream Zac Efron and what their dream children would look like. Her patterned quilt is messily bunched up on the wooden floor- even in her peaceful slumber she could recognise that it is too damn hot, and that there was no choice but to ceremoniously evict the cover from the bed.
And...there goes the alarm! Her serene marriage dream is rudely cut short by the simultaneous occurrence of a screeching alarm clock, and a booming knock on her bedroom door. She replies to both in a similar fashion: a rough smack to the snooze button, and a loud "fuck off" to the person behind the door. Unfortunately for our hero, the door bursts open regardless and there stands Aradia Megido; sporting a stylish set of 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' pajamas and filled to the brim with radiant energy. Her hair is a mess of knots and tangles with some of it hanging over her eye, forcing her grin to appear even more manic than usual. Aradia is a messy sleeper, unlike Damara; whose sleeping habits can only be described as delicate. Damara, however always wakes up ten thousand times as moody as her twin.
"My dearingest, darlingest Sister, who I love so much!" The younger twin points dramatically at her sister. "Today we are going to have a fun and girly day that all of a weird friends will be totally, completely, over the top jealous of!" Damara smashes her face into her pillow.
"Leave now." The words are muffled against the fabric. "I have got plans with Kankri today, so this "girly day" that you have planned is not happening." Her hand motions for Aradia to shoo, but she stays put.
"No, no no!" She insists. "I already talked to Kankri. It was super easy to convince that chump that you needed to spend time with your 'darling sister'. He'll believe anything I can come up with! He didn't like it when I called him Kinkri though-" The nickname earns her a muted chuckle, and her grin somehow manages to widen. "Anyway, today we're gonna order the cheapest pizza possible and gossip about BOYS. And maybe I'll stick a shitty anime in for us to ignore. I've been watching a lot of sports anime recently if you haven't noticed-" Damara lifts her head up to glare at her.
"I have. It is all you talk about."
Aradia giggles. "Whatever. Anyway rise and shine Sleeping Ugly-"
"You cannot call me ugly, we have the same face!" Damara spits, displaying her middle finger to her sister, as if it were eccentric modern art.
"Yeah, and yet I'm still somehow prettier! Weird right!" Sticking her tongue out playfully only earns her a snarl from her sister. "Either way get up I made sooo many fucking pancakes. Like. A fuckton of pancakes. It'll be a fucking miracle if we eat them all." Damara rolls her eyes and laughs. She slowly pulls herself off the bed so she can jog past her sister; lightly tapping her shoulder on the way out of the room.
"Just you fucking watch, sister."
Despite there indeed being a 'fuckton of pancakes' perched on the kitchen table, the two sisters managed to devour all of them within half an our. After their pancake-fest they decided their best option was to watch 'Osomatsu-san' while Damara did Aradia's hair.
"So Damz how's it going with Mr Krabs?-" Damara yanks her hair and she yelps.
"Me and Kankri -" She accentuates his name, expressing her annoyance at her sister's seemingly endless array of nicknames for him; "-are doing just fine." Aradia pouts and turns her head slightly, not caring that her plait might end up slightly off-centre.
"No fair sis, you never give me any details!" She waves her hands around dramatically.
"And you give me far too many."
"Come on, tell me about your last date- wait hey! I do not give you too many details." Damara raises her eyebrow, skeptical.
"Aradia, just yesterday you were describing in great detail about the time you gave Kankri's step-brother a drunk handjob at your best friend's party."
"Ha ha oh yeah I did do that didn't I! Wow that was embarrassing. Now c'mon tell me about your boyf, sis." The older sister sighs in resignation, and Aradia throws her arms in the air, her aim accomplished.
"Alright... Well we went to this little restaurant near the school..."
"And then he kissed me good-bye and went home. There you go. I told you all about my date." Somehow Aradia always managed to forget how long Damara liked to spin stories out for. Nearly four whole episodes had gone past since the start of her story, and both sisters were really lost as to what is happening on the screen. Just some good ol' sextuplet hi-jinx, they assume.
"Wow sis. That was really some date, it sounds like it was fun."
"Oh, it was. Do you want to hear about the one before it, it was even bett-" Aradia coughs loudly to cut her off.
"No! I mean, uh, it's getting late let's order the pizza!"
Seven episodes, and three pepperoni pizzas, later and the twins have their best idea of the whole day.
"Aradia?"
"Yeah, sis?" Aradia stares at the screen, unable to tear her gaze away from the painful man prancing around. He reminded her of Dirk, but she couldn't tell if it was the sunglasses or the misunderstood personality. Probably the sunglasses.
"I think we should get drunk." Damara yawns and scratches her head. Aradia turns her head and beams at her.
"Sis, that is the best fucking idea I've ever heard."
One Beer.
"Y'know Damz I just don't see why Karamatsu stays with his brothers they treat him like shit, man."
Damara sighs thoughtfully. "I think he might feel like he will have nowhere to go if he leaves, like his brothers are the only people he has."
"Okay now you're being a downer, lets watch One Punch Man instead."
Two beers.
The two girls have fucking destroyed their couch in a pillow fight. There are feathers and splatters of beer coating the entire ground and oh god it is fucking awful; and yet they are still going at it. Damara takes a pillow to the face, retaliating quickly with a feathery smash to Aradia's arm. Next is a whack to the leg and Damara has toppled over onto the ground. It was an exciting fight but it looks like Aradia will be taking the trophy home- hold on. What's this? Damara has pulled Aradia onto the ground with her, what a shocking turn of events!
Both girls dissolve into a fit of giggles.
Five beers.
"Yo Damara d'you remember that party we were talkin' about?" She hiccups loudly. "Th'one at Fef's place?"
"Yeah, I remember? What about it?"
"See like, in th' middle of the party- y'know before I jacked Karkat off- Fef 'n Sollux were both super drunk and decided to admit that they both have crushes on me? Like? What'm I supposed t'do with that?! They're dating, and it's not like I can date both of them at the same time is it?"
"No you totally can if they're 'kay with it." Damara rubs her eyes and yawns. "Doubt your gonna get judged by th' company we keep."
Aradia's eyes seem to glitter with a new-found hope.
"Oh my God... I can date them both!" She cheers and throws her can in the air, showering the two in alcohol.
Ten Beers.
The clock reads three minutes to midnight, and the two young women are finally silent. Aradia is curled up on the floor in front of the TV. A light snore is erupting from her, while a everlasting stream of drool pools up on the carpet. Damara is sprawled out across the sofa, unmoving aside from her leg twitching every now and then. The menu screen playing on the TV repeats the anime's opening theme again, as it has been doing for a few hours.
Midnight chimes, and the day is over.
"Hey, Aradia?" Damara looks up from the toilet to her sister who is holding her hair. Her throat is still scratchy from vomiting so harshly.
"Yes, my dear Sister?" Aradia sounds a lot more chipper than she looks. She is practically green in the face, and dark circles have perched themselves under her eyes; making her look like one of the living dead.
"Next time I'm going out with Kankri instead."
Aradia laughs hoarsely.
"We'll see."