Chapter Text
"How… How did I get caught? How did I manage to get caught trying to-" Click. That noise pulled me out of my thoughts. It was the Rouge that was just down the hall from my cell. He escaped and was freeing the others. This was my time to get out! Even if I've only been here for a few months I'm still helping the others out. That's when I remembered about the woman that was my cellmate. We didn't talk much. She always seemed to be crying. She was muscular and had tusks. "Must be some sort of orc or half orc" I thought. Nevertheless I hurried over to her and picked the lock. She slowly walked through the opened gate of her cell and it was evident she had been here much longer than the Rouge. She stretched her neck, letting it pop, as I saw the look in her eyes. She wanted to kill. Although she was muscular it was clear she hadn't eaten a good meal or worked out. Her dreads were grown out and messy. But I didn't have much time to think before the alarm started blaring.
It was a blur honestly. I think someone went through a door? I'm not fully sure but we were on a ship together out of that damn prison. There's not a lot to do stuck on a random ship with strangers. "Alright this is my chance, they don't know me or my past. This is a new start and I can't lose this opportunity for a new life." I took a deep breath and put on a cheerful voice. "Hey everyone! You did a great job! Since we are part of the same little pirate crew now I thought it would be a great idea to introduce ourselves!" The half orc spoke first, "My name is Suther. I'm 29" "Shit." I thought to myself. " They are saying their ages…I can't say I'm 17 they would kick me out of here in a heartbeat. I gotta play along." The Rouge was the next to speak. "I'm Koshumetsu, I'm 24." I talked next although I didn't really know what all to say. They were keeping things fairly basic so that's what I did. "Well it's nice to meet you two! I'm Shofie and I'm- 21! I had my birthday a few days ago." That seemed old enough. Old enough to be in this group but young enough to fit my features. Maybe I just hadn't grown into them. Yeah that's it.
I figured we needed to at least open up with each other. Besides we were a crew now and crews need to trust each other. "So… what were you guys in prison for?" I asked hesitantly. "Well I ran away from the navy. They caught me and threw me into that cell." Suther spoke with a strong and firm voice. By how she sounded she was most likely telling the truth. It would make sense for her to be in the prison longer than me or Koshumetsu. "I am a spy. I was caught and put into prison. I was planning to escape and it just seemed easier with a crowd."
Koshumetsu spoke quite calmly, as to be expected from a Rouge. Both seemed to be telling the truth so I decided I should as well. "I tried to kill the king. He's evil and needs to be overthrown." I felt the words slip out of my mouth. For some reason I felt so nervous. "Shit should I have lied? Both of these people have most likely been close to the king…" I feared my thoughts showed on my face. That's when Suther spoke up. "Oh tried to kill the king? Good. He's a real ass hole. Although I wasn't close with him." Koshumetsu spoke up. "Yeah man really needs to be taken down, who knows what horrible things that man has done behind closed doors." "I know what he did behind closed doors" I thought to myself. I quickly pushed the thought away so the others wouldn't see. I was relieved that what I had said didn't cause any issues. It would make sense for the rogue to be a spy. Besides, they are usually sneaky. It's unusual for one to be caught.
We spent the rest of the day deciding rooms, roles, chores, and fighting weird space bugs. I noticed Suther kept glancing at me with her silver eyes. I didn't think much of it. Turns out she's a palatine and she helped heal me when I was injured by the bugs. We both decided to sleep together in the same room to save some space. There were two beds and Koshumetsu wanted to sleep in the storage room anyway. We were both getting ready for bed when I decided to talk to her.
" Hey I've noticed that you don't really like your dreads… they also seem to be grown out… If you want I can help you take them out.." I didn't expect a response from her. I was a complete stranger offering to do her hair for her. "Actually I've been wanting to get some braids… the next time we stop I need to get some moisturizer for my hair. Being in prison doesn't really help keep your hair nice and clean" She spoke with the same strong and firm voice but this time there was a calming tone to it. She seemed more relaxed. "Must be why she's letting me do her hair" I thought. “ So how do you want your braids done?” I asked. She seemed to have been frozen. Like this question caught her off guard. “ You want to do my braids?” Suther asked rather hesitantly. “ Of course!” I responded with a very cheerful tone. “ I don't really know… Do you even know how to braid?” Although her voice was still the same I could tell she didn’t fully trust me. Which is understandable. Some people just need time to trust people. “ Don’t worry I’ve done braids for a lot of people- um like in the prison you know?” I almost blew my cover. I can’t let that slide again. So far they just see me as a young woman who doesn’t seem to be a threat. I am assuming they already know I’m a changeling of some sort. “How much would you want me to pay?” Suther sounded like she was actually thinking about taking my offer. “ Oh don’t worry about that! We are part of a crew! Why would I make you pay for something that would help you?” I couldn't help but smile a bit once I had said that. I was a part of this crew! Suther seemed like a really nice person behind all the suspicion. “ Alright then… I’ll take up your offer.” Although she wasn’t fully facing me in the moment I could have sworn I saw a small smile of relief on her face.
I grabbed some brushes and combs and went to work. For being in the navy she was incredibly tender-headed. I was scared I was using too much force before she reassured me this bit of information. Her hair reminded me of another… palace worker… only her hair was much longer and better taken care of. She was a rather nice half elf named Isha. "Isha would have loved to see me doing this" I caught myself mid though to stop the look on my face. I prayed Suther didn't see the look on my face. "I can't think about that now… not with her watching". I kept combing Suther's hair until we got all the dreads and knots out. I let her trim and cut her ends because she seemed a little uneasy about me near her with scissors. While she was in the mirror I sat on my bed thinking. “What type of person should I be with this new chance?” and that’s when I remembered Mille. The sweetest woman ever. Her red hair and grace were beyond comparison to any god or goddess. She is more beautiful than Helen of Troy. Her emerald green eyes sparkled when the sunlight hit her pale face. She was a cook for the king. That’s when I remembered the promise I made to her.
I must have been smiling like a fool. When I finally looked up Suther was looking at me with a questioning look in her silver eyes. “ Oh sorry I was just daydreaming. It just feels so nice to be out of prison.” I said this with a soft smile trying to get Mille out of my mind or at least the thought of her off my face. Suther calmly sat down in front of me and said “Nothing too major, just some basic braids." “ Alrighty! Since your hair is only really down to your shoulders this shouldn’t take too long. And you can braid the front to help with time.” I tried to hide the excitement in my voice but I just couldn’t. I was just so excited to finally do someone’s hair again.
As I started braiding my mind started to wander. A thought of Mille popped into my mind. We couldn’t have been more than 16 when this happened. Mille was leading me through the castle and holding my hand as she walked. Her dress just below her knees and her hair put up in a bun. She led me outside, which I had rarely gone to since I arrived at the castle, and brought me to a small garden where the guards often didn’t bother checking. My dress was longer so it dragged a bit as we walked out. We found a bench and sat down under the night sky. She had found out it was my birthday. September 20th. We both looked up at the sky just in time to see a shooting star, then another, and another! It was a meteor shower that only happened once in 10 years. When I finally looked back at Mille she was holding a small piece of candy. “This was all I could sneak out. Most people don’t like the taste so the maids didn’t really notice when I took it. It’s blue raspberry… I remembered you had said you liked it..” Her voice was soft and sweet like honey. The moonlight danced on her already pale skin as she passed the small candy to me. “ Oh Mille you didn’t have to do that!” my voice was shaking slightly. I thought no one knew when my birthday was. Mille had always been kind to me. “How can I repay you?” I asked quickly. “Don’t you worry about it Shofie! It’s your birthday. And I know you haven’t been able to go outside as much.” She gently placed her hand on my shoulder and that was the first time I saw the look in her eyes. The look that-
“Um… Shofie? Are you good? I think you’ve braided that section enough…” Suther’s voice dragged me back out of my thoughts. “Hm- Oh! Yep! Sorry I just wanted to make sure this braid didn’t fall out overnight.” I hoped I wasn’t smiling the whole time. My voice came out rather rushed but I don’t think Suther noticed. I kept braiding her hair but my thoughts kept wondering. Although this time I remembered to stop braiding and move on to the next section. Weirdly enough my thoughts drifted back to Mille.
She was helping me wash my hair. It had gotten dirty from laying in the grass and the king hated when I had dirty hair. I was grateful he gave me the day off but… I still didn't know why. I never told anyone my birthday. I hated it. Being the center of attention, people spending money on me, just wasn't my cup of tea. Mille's hands were gentle with my hair as she brushed, detangled, and washed my hair. She checked on me every time I flinched. It wasn't her fault. Oh God no… she could never be the reason why I would flinch. Her touch was like one of a goddess. Gentle and kind with every fiber in her body. Once she washed my hair she grabbed my sleeping wear for me… although she wasn't my servant the king assigned to me she always treated me like I was worth more than the earth itself. She dried and brushed my hair as I sat at my vanity. "Thanks Mille for tonight. I've been needing some fresh air" Mille looked at me in the mirror and said "You don't have to thank me for anything. Besides this is what friends do. They help each other." I had never heard such truthful words. We heard footsteps coming to my door. I quickly hid Mille in one of the servant doors. I silently rushed back to my vanity and sat down just in time before the door opened revealing the king.
"And done! How do you like your braids?" I asked as I finished the last braid. "This will do for now. My hair is too damaged to do much else. Thank you" Suther's voice still had a certain commanding tone. She was part of the Navy so maybe that's why she almost always sounds like she is giving orders even with a simple thank you. "You don't have to thank me. It's the least I can do for my new roommate and crew member!" I stretched my arms out as I laid down into my bed. Braiding that much hair after not practicing can take a lot of energy. I wished Suther a good night's rest before we turned out the lights. This ship was rather advanced. Maybe it was purely magic. The castle still used candles and lamp lights. I couldn't sleep. Too much was running through my mind. This bed didn't help so I figured I would sneak out of the room. I slowly sat up in the darkness and just couldn't move. Not because of the stiffness in my muscles, not from the fear of waking Suther but something else. I felt that slimy feeling creeping in and I knew what was about to happen. Another flashback or another episode.
But I wasn't stressed. What could have been causing this… The feeling started at my feet before slowly creeping up. To my thighs, my hips, my waist, my stomach, and finally my chest. I curled up into a ball not knowing what to do. It never just stopped at my chest before. This anger and guilt is just resting in my chest. All I can do is lay down and be quiet. Left alone with my thoughts. I hated it. The thoughts crept in without my consent. The feeling of the brush in my hair, breaths against my ears, the hands invading my senses. The tears streamed down my face as I called for help but no one came. I couldn't run. I tried to but I couldn't. They just watched. Was I not good enough to have the decency to die? Why couldn't they have just let me die… at least then I would know where Aaron is. If he's alive or dead. I miss him. I miss him so much it hurts. I remember the warmth of his smile. He was only seven. The bed feels cold. It's too light. I have nothing left of him. Nothing. I could have saved him. I should have stayed by his side.I slowly opened my eyes. It wasn't morning yet but a few people were already up. I just sat there. I closed my eyes after a while and just tried to think of other things. But my mind wandered back home.
I remember holding Aaron in my arms at a meeting my parents were attending and hosting. He was so small and fragile. I sat with my brother and sister outside the hall. "What do you think they are talking about this time?" Zack said. His voice was in a hushed tone. "Probably some boring grown up stuff" Luna said with a slight huff to her voice. They were my siblings. Triplets in fact! Although I was the last to be born so they always called me the younger sister. "Guys Aaron just grabbed my hand!" My voice sounded like a bunch of crickets trying to talk all at once. I had stayed up the night before trying to learn a new song with my mother. "Shofie this is the 3rd time he has grabbed your hand. Calm down." Luna was rather annoyed. She didn't seem as excited as I was about our new baby brother. That's when our parents came out and took him off my hands. "You did a great job holding him Shofie! Come on, let's go eat some breakfast!"
I opened my eyes once more to the smell of something starting to cook. I looked over and Suther was gone. "Must have already gone to breakfast" I thought. I slowly sit up once again holding my head. Getting dressed felt like a blur honestly. I didn't want to see myself so maybe that's why. Once I arrived in the kitchen there was a feast waiting for us. Bacon, pancakes, sausage, and black licorice? I don't really know why black licorice was there but Suther loved it. I didn’t know where to sit so I sat next to Suther who was… erm… eating black licorice like spaghetti. “Well they can’t all be sane” I thought to myself as I started making my plate. I had some bacon and a little bit of eggs. I wasn’t too hungry after last night. That’s when the captain started speaking. “Good morning crew! Hope this is to y’alls liking. We should be making a stop at Gold’s Peak in two days or so. So eat up!” His voice sounded cheerful but also sounded strong with command. “We must not be his first crew” I thought to myself as I ate breakfast. We all gained our roles and chores. I was an entertainer from the fact that I am a bard. My chores were to clean the shared room, sweep the halls, and overall entertain my new crew. I didn’t mind this at all actually. Everyone enjoyed when I played my violin. On the downside I would spend most of my days by myself. I didn’t want to stress out Suther and the rogue… well he was doing his own thing. I decided to start by cleaning the room. I needed to make my bed anyway and Suther said she liked to make her own bed so I left it alone. I started cleaning up the bathroom sink since I forgot to put away the things from doing Suther’s hair from the night before. As I was wiping down the sink counter I saw someone from the corner of my eye in the mirror. I quickly turned around only to see nothing. I went back to cleaning the counter as I heard the door creek open. “Koshumetsu you could have just knocked and I would have let you in! I’m cleaning up the bathroom right now if you need something!” I slightly yelled over my shoulder and waited for a response. Nothing. “ If you're not going to talk I’m going back to cleaning!” Still no response. I slowly turned my head so I was once again fully facing the mirror and counter. I finished the counter and finally looked up to see myself in the mirror. I saw the king behind me. Ready to grab my waist.
I jolted back and my back hit the wall behind me. No one was there. I looked back in the mirror only to see myself looking back at me. No one else. Just me. I slowly pushed myself off of the wall and walked out of the bathroom. I had just barely calmed down when I heard Koshumetsu’s voice. “Shofie? Did you say my name?” He was just down the hall. “Oh yeah sorry I thought you opened the door! Carry on!” I did my best to mask the fear in my voice. I scurried back inside the room and quietly shut the door. My back once again found the wall. I slid down until I was sitting fully on the ground. I pulled my knees to my chest as my breaths became quicker, my vision dimed, almost all my senses left me.
His hands grabbed the brush from my bed and started brushing out my hair. I silently sat there hoping he wouldn’t ask why the brush was there. His hands slid down to my neck, then my back before resting them on my shoulders. “ Why didn’t the servants help you tonight dear.” His voice was low and almost hushed. As he spoke his hands slightly squeezed my shoulders. “I told them not to worry my lord. I wanted them to rest as well.” My voice wavered at the end. I lied about that. I had gone missing to hang out with Mille so they must have gone to bed already. “ That was rather kind of you dear. Tell me why you aren’t asleep yet. Usually you are already asleep by now. Unless someone kept you up.” He leaned down into my ear to say the last part of that. His breath almost stung from his words but I tried to remain calm. “No my lord, simply thoughts have plagued my mind. I do thank you for the day off. Although I must ask the reason.” I was trying to change the topic. I was buying Mille time to run back to the kitchen before he got suspicious. “ My dear can’t I just gift you a day? You worry so much about small little things. A girl like you shouldn't have to worry. Pretty things like yourself should relax.” His hand went to my face and pushed a strand away from my eyes. “ Such beautiful hair. So long and dark. Shofie if you keep this up it might get harder for me to just gift you days off. Oh such a pretty young girl I’m so glad you're mine and no one else's. Although I don’t mind my friends borrowing you.” His hands slid further down to my chest as he talked. I flinched but he just held me tighter. His hands stopped just above my bust. " I'll let you rest dear. We have a very special guest coming over tomorrow and I need you to serve the wine."
“-oh I didn’t know that Shofie! I’ll definitely remember that for later! And thank you again for the hair tie! My hair was getting in my face and I gotta move more storage things!” that voice was Koshumetsu’s! How long have we been talking for? Was I talking to him? I gave him a hair tie? Shoot I’m taking too long to respond “Oh you're welcome! I don’t really need it, my hair doesn’t really bother me much.” I did a quick glance to see where I was and I was down the hall and out of the room. I don’t remember getting up and even starting to talk to Koshumetsu. Maybe I had done some more chores? I would have to check on that after he was done talking to me. "Well I gotta go finish my chores. Oh and by the way before I leave, what time is it again?" Hopefully if I knew the time I could tell how long I had blacked out. "Oh it's almost noon" he spoke calmly before he waved good-bye and walked away. “Noon?!!? It’s already Noon?!?!” my thoughts raced as I tried to calmly walk to my other chores. “I was out for 3 hours?!?! What did I do?!?!?” This was a constant thought. I checked the halls and they seemed to be cleaner. The only hall I needed to clean wasn’t too bad. It looked like I had stopped half way to talk then walked away. I found the broom and started sweeping again. Surprisingly there wasn’t too much dirt or dust. I wiped my hands on my pants to clean off the dirt from them. That’s when Suthur came up to me. “Oh hey Kilvard says it’s time for lunch. Also great job on the hallways.” Her voice seemed almost calmer. This was also my first time seeing her braids after she slept. Not too many fell out much, still looked more comfortable than the dreads. “Oh thanks! I’m just going to wash my hands before I start eating.” Suthur nodded her head before walking away. She wasn’t much of a talker. Maybe said two sentences at a time. I don’t blame her, she doesn’t know us and it’s going to take a moment before she fully becomes comfortable.
I quickly ate lunch before going back to the room. There wasn’t a lot to do after chores got done. “Maybe I should go talk to the others and see what they are up to” I thought. “ Then again I don’t want to come on too chipper and I already had a full on conversation with Koshumetsu today.” In the end I just sat on my bed not really knowing what to do. I let my fingers feel the fabric of the bedsheets and blankets as I just stared. Maybe I could just hide away for a little bit. Besides I didn’t even know how to really strike up an interesting conversion.
My mind started to wonder once again hoping to escape the memory but it didn’t work. I was in a lovely dress. This one falling below my knees but above my ankles. The fabric, smooth against my skin, swayed as I walked. The King didn’t want to reveal too much of his gift. I heard through the servants gossiping this man was rather high up in the Navy. In fact, he just got promoted. I grabbed the wine and the cups and waited until the king told me to come in. I had done this rather often so I knew what to do. Only this time was different. Instead of other servants running around to set up food, bring out the entertainers, and make this gathering lively It was just me. The food had already been set out, no entertainers, and especially no cooks to ask how to cook to taste. It was odd. It was quiet but rather loud at the same time. I heard each of my footsteps, the gentle jingles of the jewelry the king had given to me, and I heard each breath. I had to calm myself down before I became a painting mess. That’s when the King called me in.
“Now Kolus, to celebrate your most recent achievement, I've decided to give you a beautiful gift. And look! Here she comes now! Look at how graceful she walks with the wine. Let her pour you a cup!” The king's voice was quite happy. Too happy. But I couldn’t question that now I had to be perfect. If I were to make a mistake he could possibly hurt Mille. I’m fairly certain he knows I’m friends with her so I can’t mess up. I poured the wine like I had been taught. First to the guest, then the king. I finished the King’s cup when his hand went to my waist. “She is a rare one too! Half changeling half human. She can change into just about any appearance. I didn’t even have to buy her either! In Fact she was a little gift from one of the… little restraint forces. She was the leader’s daughter! And just look at how well behaved she is!” He was using me as a brag. Nothing more nothing less. Maybe after his little speech I could go back to my room. I hadn’t looked up until he grabbed my face to show Kolus. That’s when I saw his monster-like face. His eyes were black, his pupils golden. Staring right at me. He had dark hair that didn’t strike me to be unclean. In fact it looked more well kept than my own. His skin was a light grey with round facial features. His teeth stuck out of his mouth like knives.
He was terrifying. I wanted to go back to looking down at the floor. “She certainly is quite the prisoner. I must say you dressed her up quite fine. I don’t even let my soldiers dress like that. I think I vaguely remember the raid where you got her. Must say even then she didn’t put up much of a fight. Although my scourge was the main force commander. So I’m not all that surprised.” His voice rang through my mind. His army was the one that took me away from home. He was the one to blame for everything that happened. I wanted him dead on the spot. But I kept a neutral expression on my face. The king was the next to speak. “Well I don’t want a pretty face like this to run away now do I? She is perfect for a… little night of fun. Although I shouldn’t be giving away everything. It’s better when you go in blind. My wife wishes I give myself a rest from her. That way she is still exciting for longer. So I wouldn’t notice if you were to let’s say have her for a night.” Those words went through my chest. He wanted me to… No… No… I couldn’t. This man is vile to even look at. He killed my father, mother, and brother! I could drop a wine glass, pick up a shard, take him to the room, and I would show him the pain that I felt. The way I felt helpless when all I could do was scream. “I’m rather flattered by the offer but I’m not really interested.” Kolus’ response caught me off guard. Usually the men jumped at the offer.”Oh if you don’t prefer women she can look more masculine. Trust me she is very talented.” I wanted to hiss at those words. I wanted a knife. These men didn’t deserve to breathe the air in the room. They would be friends with the devil himself. “He must have drank too much wine, my lord.” My voice rang out as it had escaped me. The king tightened his grip on my waist once the words left my mouth. “What a lovely voice that speaks the truth. I wouldn’t want this offer on a drunken night.” Once Kolus finished speaking the King let out a laugh and let go of my waist. Signaling me to sit on the ground by his lap. “Oh yes! I forget how much of a wise man you truly are! I should have told you ahead of time so you wouldn’t have drank so much wine. I’m sure you want your mind clear when you do take the offer.” I let out a silent breath of relief. The king wasn’t forcing this.. At least not this time. The king seemed to be a bit drunk himself. He kept his hands to himself for once.
I returned to my room alone that night grateful for the silence. Someone came. “One of the servants" I thought. That’s when I felt someone lay down beside me on the bed. It was Mille! Her hair was down, the moonlight hit her face and made her eyes shine. “Mille!” I said in a hushed whisper. I sat up and hugged her as she laid down on my bed. “Sorry I came in so late. We had a lot to clean up and I saw that weird man go to his room alone so I wanted to visit you! I also thought you might need help getting ready for bed but I can see you’ve already done that.” Her face was underneath mine as she smiled. I could hear her heartbeat and I knew she was safe and sound here. Even in the darkest nights she would come and visit me. “If you want you can sit in my vanity and I can brush your hair” I spoke softly just in case someone was listening.
I briefly opened my eyes but they soon closed once again. They were too heavy with sleep to keep open. My mind drifted to a time that wasn’t so joyful with Mille. It was the first time I tried to kill the king, but I killed the queen. He had called me to his bedroom for weeks on end. Oftentimes I didn’t return to my room until the sun rose. My body was in pain, my mind was dull, I was tired. I was weak and couldn’t do anything. His greedy hands kept trailing up and down my body hours after he had left. Even by myself I couldn’t sleep. I was too scared that he would come while I slept and drag me off. Mille had to stop for a little bit with visiting me. We were getting too sloppy with covering the trail. It was for her safety. I stared out the window looking down into the gardens. My eyes drifted at each plant, each guard, and each servant. I couldn’t run away. That’s when a purple flower caught my eye. I had seen it before in my village. Wolfsbane. It’s highly poisonous. Even the slightest touch could kill someone. That’s when I finally had the idea. I was going to kill the king.
Although I wasn’t allowed outside, I was allowed to pick flowers, herbs, and other such things to make my own perfume and hair oils. I hadn’t done so in a while so it would make sense for me to ask to do so. It seemed as though the staff didn’t know of the fact that this was a danger. Although I’ve heard the taste is often bitter, that wouldn’t stop me. I could put some into his wine, I could have the oil placed onto his skin, I could even dip his fork into the poison. “I bet there is some way to mask the taste.” I thought to myself. “He has even eaten food I have made without poison testers. I might actually be free!” I let myself rest, but only for a moment. I needed a clear mind to deal with poison.
The servants came in and started dressing me up for a meeting. “Why are you dressing me up? There is nothing today!” My voice came out in a rush. If there was a meeting that day I wouldn't have time to get the wolfsbane! “Oh but you do! A high ranking soldier is coming today!” “He’s insane! Shofie be safe please!” The maids started to talk over each other as they dressed me. My mind was in a rush. “Insane? Soldier? Who are they? Why would the king want me to be there?” It didn’t matter, I was being rushed out to the throne room before I could even say a word. I sat down in a chair next to the king. For once they put a veil over the lower half of my face. I guess they didn’t want the soldier to be tempted.
The doors opened wide just as I had fixed my veil. There stood a 4’3 kobold. His eyes were sharp and I could tell he was the soldier. Although it was clear this kobold was insane he didn’t look powerful. But looks can be deceiving. He had the power of a great red dragon. That’s why the king wanted him. I knew he wouldn’t offer me to an insane soldier, I was meant to be borrowed not killed. “I do believe you know why you're here, Rorge. So let’s keep things simple. There is a village right along the borders of my kingdom to the north. Destroy it. I want it fast, almost silent to the public. So that means no survivors. Understood?” The king's voice echoed in the room as silence fell. The kobold simply nodded his head to the task. Seeming unfazed. “Maybe I actually might have to make the poison” I thought. Rorge turned and walked to his room. He was unusually calm for an insane soldier. Maybe they gave him some medicine that calmed him down.
This was my moment to ask the king to go outside. If he asked I needed to make hair oil. I needed the flowers and such. I slowly stood up once it was time for me to leave and I walked over to the king. “My lord, I have a request to make if you shall approve of it.” I made my voice sickly sweet just like how he wanted it. I made little movement and little eye contact. “My dear, what is it? You’ve been so good recently that I am more than happy to grant this request.” His hand went to my chin and lifted my face so I was looking in his eyes. “I have run out of my hair oil. I wish to go pick some flowers and herbs so I may make some more.” My voice didn’t crack. It was steady as if I wasn’t lying. “Why dear of course! I’ve been making you work so hard you must have run out quicker than normal. What a kind little columbine. Go outside to the gardens and think about how much of a kind king I am.” His voice made me want to throw up and tear my eardrums out. Making himself seem kind. I hid the anger that was brewing in me. “Oh thank you my lord! I shall make extra so I don’t have to ask again so soon!” His hand let go of my face as I walked off.
The air felt amazing. Summer was in full swing. I immediately ran to the spot where I had seen the wolfsbane. I had to be sure not to touch it when putting it in my basket. I used my dress as a glove around my hands as I picked the flower. I picked a variety of flowers as I slowly walked through the garden.
I took my time walking through the garden. It had almost been a year since the last time I went outside. A new smell caught me off guard. It was like a lemon smell. Not too overpowering but noticeable. I looked around to try and find the flower that made the smell until I saw a trumpet-like flower that was yellow and grew on a tree. This was a new flower! I knew the queen liked to add in new plants every once in a while so this must have been a new addition. I didn’t know if this flower was also poisonous so I used my dress to pick the flowers. I would ask Mille to hopefully grab me a plant book. We hadn’t been seen together in over 2 months. We threw the king off our trail. I had convinced him I asked for some extra food because he had been tiring me out. I could ask one of my servants to grab me a book for some night reading. I could request one about the plants in the garden so they would get the right type of book. I took my time walking back inside my room. I didn’t want to go back inside where all the horrors of the King took place.
Before the raid I was able to go outside and stay out for as long as I wanted. I could feel the grass under my bare feet, cool water from a near-by creek, and flowers used as crowns for my parents. But all that’s left there is blood, dirt, and corpses. This was the closest thing I could get to feeling like I was home again. I wanted to hear Aaron laugh, Luna and Zack helping mom clean, dad hugging me when I got scared of the nosies. Their blood was all on my hands because I wasn’t a strong enough leader. And now more blood is going to be spilled because I am weak. I can’t handle anything. I’m just a little girl who in her own life has nothing. If I was going to do one thing in my life before I die, It would be to get rid of this monster. A monster who has hurt so many people, my family, friends, people in his own kingdom. This is no King. This is a monster who lusts after power and doesn’t care who he hurts. No this isn’t a he. This is an it. This thing doesn't deserve a proper name or title. It deserves to be the dirt that everyone walks on.
It didn’t call me to its room that night. The thing was giving me two weeks to make some hair oil. The first night the flowers just had to dry so I snuck outside under the night sky. I made sure to walk where no one would see me. I had made it to the tree with the new flowers when I heard footsteps. I jumped into some shrubs and bushes hoping they didn’t see me. I looked between the leaves to see who it was. It was the insane Kobolt. “What is he doing in the garden? Why is he out?” my thoughts raced as he came closer, and closer, and closer until he stopped. Right at the base of the tree. He just stared at the flowers. Making no noise, no movement, just still. It was a little unsettling to be honest. That’s when he started mumbling something. “Nasturtium….Nasturtium.” “Nasturtium?” I thought. The name sounded familiar. I think I read it in my plant books. It’s a flower that's rather circular. We have some in the garden, in fact I usually use some to make my perfume. I moved the collar of my dress over my nose to hide my face once again. I made my voice just barely above a whisper. “Nasturtium is this way.” He turned towards me as I spoke. I slowly walked out of the bush and slowly started walking to the Nasturtium. I looked back after a few steps to see if he was following me. He was. Calmly and without making a sound. He kept his head down as we walked to the Nasturtiums. I put my voice back into the sweet whisper and said “You mustn't tell the king I was here. I will not tell him of your time in the garden.” He seemed to have nodded in a way of understanding.
We reached the flowers in the moonlight. The air was still and calm. I slowly knelt down by the bed of flowers, took out the small knife I had been using to cut flowers earlier, and cut a few flowers for him. I made sure they all had a good amount of stem still attached so he could put them in water. Rourge slowly reached for the flowers and gently took them from my hands. This wasn’t a fully insane soldier, just one that had a lot on their mind. He seemed too calm to be this destroyer of villages. Maybe he was like me at one point in time. Wishing to go home when home isn’t there anymore.
Time passed and Rouge went out on the mission. I had finally dried all the flowers and now it was time to make the poison. I was careful not to touch them too much in case they were to cause a rash. I grabbed the olive oil and turned the petals into a fine powder. It was almost done. Soon this kingdom would be free of the monster that tormented it. I left about a tablespoon of powdered petals to put into the king's food along with the oil. I knew the ingredients were edible, well aside from the poison. I would cook soup. Nothing too fancy, just something that some flowers, oil drizzle, and “love” would make taste so much better. The question was what kind of soup would I make? That’s when I remembered one of the king’s favorite dishes, garlic soup. The garlic would cover the slight bitterness of the wolfsbane, along with the angel's trumpets , the new flowers, the color wouldn’t be affected. It would make sense for me to make some for him as a thank you gift for letting me go outside. It was perfect.
I started making the soup with the help of Mille. I told her I was making a thank you gift for the king, I didn’t tell her about the poison. If I got caughtI didn’t want her going to jail instead of me. The flowers looked like some sort of seasonings anyway. It wouldn’t be odd if I were to add them to anyone. This was going to work. There was enough poison to kill anyone, even the strongest poison testers. The soup was just simmering in the kitchen so I decided to pack a few of my things. Once the king was dead I would have to run for my life. Out of the garden, over the garden walls, over the gates, through the streets, and into the woods. I wouldn’t have much time so it was a good idea to start packing early.
I grabbed a small bag that I used to help carry my laundry for the searvents. I grabbed one of my most expensive dresses, some jewelry, and my hair brush. All would sell for a nice price. Next I grabbed the only things I had been able to bring with me from my home. Two hair ribbons meant to be worn as bows. Aaron made them for me. Almost like a good luck charm. I hid the bag in my closet and calmly walked back to the kitchen. If anyone were to ask why I had left I forgot an ingredient in my room. Which wasn’t a lie. I had left the garnish of flower powder in my room.
I came back into the kitchen to see the queen talking to Mille. “Oh how sweet of that girl to make a gift for my husband. You know I wasn’t fully sold on the idea of having her at first. The king and I have been trying to have a child for such a long time. Maybe she will bear him a child and take the stress off of my hands.” Her voice was soothing and calm. It was never too high or too low, she was perfect. She was perfect. She was an Aasimar, so of course she seemed heavenly. She had cured a few of the servants' wounds. Her hands were on Mille’s as a faint light started to glow. “There my dear, the cut shouldn’t leave a scar. Please be more careful with knives!” Mille smiled as she said “Thank you queen Nisrine. Why don’t you try some of the soup? You know the king better than anyone so you would be the best to taste it to see if he would like it!” I froze in fear. If I told the queen she would throw me into prison. If I didn’t she would die. She had already taken a spoon full of soup and it was almost in her mouth.
It was too late. She had eaten the poison before I could stop her. There was nothing I could do to get her to throw up. With both wolfsbane and angel trumpets the touch of it is enough to cause a rash. If I remember correctly the ratio of wolfsbane and trumpets was about 2:3. That amount of poison would take about an hour to take effect. Nisrine was fairly healthy, had a strong body, and had the king's best doctors if she started feeling nauseous. But how would I get the soup to the king in time to kill him? “Oh my you put a lot of garlic in there Shofie! A bit bitter but the king will surely like it. The flowers were a good touch! Mille dear, would you mind giving me and Shofie some time alone?” My heart was pounding inside my chest. She was sending Mille away. Mille turned back and waved goodbye to me before she left me alone with the queen.
I turned towards her hoping my thoughts didn’t show. “Shofie the next time you try to poison the king maybe don’t use wolfsbane and angel trumpets. They have a distinct taste.” Her voice was unnervingly calm. She knew. “Oh my dear I’m not mad, quite the opposite. My dear husband… Well he wasn’t always like this. He has changed and not for the better. I used to love him oh so dearly but now… He is a monster. Shofie I thank you for doing what it takes. I know that I will start showing symptoms in an hour. You most like;y already have your things packed to run away.” Her hand reached out to touch my face as she spoke. Her Kind and gentle touch was the only thing that prevented me from running at that moment. She smiled at me with such kind eyes. “Shofie you didn’t kill me. I have been dead since my husband died. You just freed me from this prison. Don’t go mad, cover your trails better. You have my blessing to never bear a child with that monster. Don’t worry, I'll tell your family how you are doing. They are going to be so proud of you. Shofie you are stronger than you know.” She didn’t even let me speak a word to her. She was one of the last remaining souls in this castle that had known the king before this war. She walked away from the kitchen with such grace you would never have known she was dying.
The dream changed as I slightly woke up to Suther. She was checking up on me and quickly left me alone once she saw I was sleeping. The dream was after the queen’s funeral. Everyone was devastated. I had a month off from the king due to his grief. Everyone was quiet. It felt like everyone’s eyes were on me. They burned and weighed like bricks. But no one knew who had killed the queen. I never told anyone. It was driving me mad. Of course it would. The shadows watched my every movement. The days and nights felt the same. I wanted to scream out for my mother but I knew no one would answer. I felt their blood run down my hands, their tears were my tears, their blood was dried on me, and their eyes stayed. They were gone but they stayed.
Their voices crept into my mind. “Shofie! We miss you! Come home! Forgive her! Come home Shofie!” I couldn’t go home. Home never existed. I heard Aaron’s voice as I lay in bed one stormy night. “Sissy, why don’t you hold me any more? Why can’t we play? Do you hate me? Ma wants you home with us! Sissy please stop ignoring me!” I could only listen and never move. I had to hear his cries and screams for weeks on end. “Sissy please! Please! Help! Why did you leave?” His sobs hurt worse. I could only listen to my little brother sobbing and never comfort him.
I must have been wandering the halls when I heard Luna’s voice. “Ha! Look at her! She can’t even come home! What a loser. High ranking in the kingdom and still is weak. They should have killed you when you were born. Maybe ma might still be alive if she didn’t try to save her favorite little girl. You just disgrace her with your birth and yours alone!” My voice was weak, my body was weak, I was weak. The eyes kept watching me. “Stop talking about mom. SHE LOVED YOU SO WHY CAN’T SOMEONE LIKE YOU BE GRATEFUL?!” My voice rang out in the hallway as someone grabbed my arm. “DON’T TOUCH ME LUNA!” I grabbed a vase and smashed it. Their grip got tighter as I grabbed the sharp shards. “Someone get the guards!” Their voices reached my ears but the eyes were still watching.I lunged to the best of my abilities and stabbed. It wasn’t enough. I grabbed their throat and slammed them to the wall. I don’t know this person. I don’t care. I need to run. I ran as fast as I could. I heard footsteps. It didn’t matter. Aaron, Zack, Mom, And dad were at the end of this hall. Please… “PLEASE JUST LET ME GO HOME PLEASE-” That's when the warm liquid ran down my arms. I looked up for only a moment to see that the shard was in their stomach.
"...Please… guards…" Those were their last words. I felt powerful. Someone who stood by and did nothing dying at my hands. Someone else came and before I had a chance to think the shard was in their eye. Then in their chest. I needed to hurt more people. They deserved it. Someone grabbed me from behind but let go when they saw my hands. I was covered in blood and I didn't care. "THIS IS WHAT YOU DESERVE. YOU KILLED MY FAMILY AND THIS IS YOUR FATE." I felt hands on top of my head then I was on the ground. I tried getting them off but I couldn't. They were too strong and I was too tired. The guards dragged me off and I couldn't care to fight back. If I died here then I could finally see Aaron and Zack. I could finally go back home to the fields of flowers, warm grass, cool streams, the late summer breeze across my face, and my parents' voices. The songs they would sing. Ones about their lost daughter coming home, dancing songs, and loving songs. I could finally go home and sing with them while I hugged Aaron. Please… please if there is a lord that can hear this let me go home. Haven't I suffered enough? “Shofie dear what’s the matter? You’ve never misbehaved like this before, you took out 3 maids and 5 guards. I’m very disappointed in this behavior” The king’s slimy voice crept into my mind. He would never leave me alone. Not at this rate. “Shofie I think this is just grief from my wife’s sudden passing away. I understand the pain but please just calm down a little. I know you are a weak thing and I thought you would just cry for a week and all of this would be over. I guess I was wrong. You will remain in this room, with limited interactions, limited people, and limited time with your favorite little servant girl. Oh what's her name again? Mille? The little red haired cook? That’s right! Oh you little thing this is for your own good.” I felt his hands itching to grab me. His tone was sickly sweet with a sharp edge to the end. He knew about Mille. He was going to take her away if I didn’t behave. “I knew I should have kept a better eye on that Kbolt. Looks like he rubbed off on you. Besides, Nasturtium is rather common around here. You should know this with all the little plant books you’ve been reading.” My heart froze as he said these words. He knew. He knew all the secrets but how? I never spoke a word about that night in the garden. I asked for plant books yes but how would he gather all of this from plant books? His hand gently grabbed my face to look at him. “Oh don’t be so surprised. I’m a king, of course I know everything that goes on in my palace. Such a pretty face like yours shouldn’t be seen by simple commoners. Mille is nothing more than a servant who I can… dispose of, if you will, at any time. I don’t think you want that. So I’m giving you this chance to come clean or I’ll find out the hard way.” His hands slid down to my shoulders as he pushed me down to my knees. He grabbed my head and forced it to the ground. “I really don’t want to do this but you’ve left me no choice. Although I must say you look rather pretty like this.” Tears started rolling down my face as he kept his hands on me. “Please…Let me go home… I want to go home…” My voice came out as sobs. Everything was in pain and I couldn’t move. “I didn’t ask if you wanted to go home, I asked you to come clean Shofie.” I couldn’t speak. My cries overpowered my will to speak and be the perfect little gift.
CRASH
The loud sound made me jolt from the bed. I immediately ran to where I heard the crash, which was the kitchen. “Is everyone alright?! I heard a crash!” My voice sounded a bit weak like I had just been crying. But my face was dry and I hadn’t been crying. “Oh! Sorry to wake you er- Shofie! I was just making some dinner and a few pots fell!” Kilvard wasn’t steering the ship so Suther must have been the one doing so. “You must have been really tired! Suther- or was it the other one… eh I’ll get y’all’s names eventually. Well anywho one of them checked up on you and you were dead asleep! I can’t blame you, breaking out of a prison takes some energy!” For a captain he sure was chipper. Although there was a commanding tone in his voice. It sounded like he was used to giving orders but has laid back a bit. “Yeah, all the running had me beat! How much longer until dinner is served if you don’t mind me asking.” The weakness in my voice was gone now. I sounded like my normal chipper self. Well normal to them not me. “ Oh don’t you worry about it! It’s almost ready and besides you slept through lunch! I need my crew to be well fed after all!” He was right! I slept through lunch! Well at least this time I had a reasonable excuse. I had to make sure I didn’t fall asleep again before dinner. “If you want I could play my violin while you cook.” I needed to practice. In fact I hadn’t practiced in at least 5 months! “Please do! You are a bard that’s kinda your thing. I don’t mind my crew doing their thing.” And so with that I played until dinner was ready. My mind kept flashing back to Mille, the Kbolt, and the king. I didn’t let that show in my music as I kept playing.
Everyone came for dinner and Koshumetsu even gave me back my hair tie as well! Not much happened aside from me playing for a bit after dinner. I didn’t let my mind wander while playing my violin. I didn’t want to have another flash back. Especially in front of my new, well, friends. Once I finished, Kilvard started telling stories. Something about an old love, stories of Gold’s peak, a weird gnome guy? Yeah something about how he did reach godhood for a bit. I’m pretty sure it’s just a story. At least I hope so because according to said story he married the arch devil herself. The hours passed and the crew all became closer. We all shared stories about our lives and how we all ended up in prison. That's when I thought to myself, “they actually do like me. They call me a friend. I could get used to this life. Never having to deal with the king, living my life out in space. Hell I could even ask to save Mille. Yeah that’s what’s going to happen!” For the first time in a while I smiled a true smile. The feeling of saving my friend, never having to see the king, the general, or the Kbolt was amazing. For once I wasn’t weak and for once I actually had a chance. I would never have to deal with Kolus’ scourge ever again and I could be free! Maybe one day me and Mille can have a home together with an open field, the cool creek, sounds of children running around the village and we can just live without a war to threating everything. This is what I want.