Chapter Text
Jimin had always liked older men, so it can’t be that much of a surprise that his first time was with a thirty-five year old man.
Him crushing on teachers, giving eyes to shop owners, or sexting his favourite actors hoping they’d reply with a heart. None of that was a surprise, and it was part of Jimin’s personality!
The thing is, it had never really happened.
The few actual relationships he’d had were with guys his age, and they weren’t… well, enough. Guys his age were dumb, inexperienced, ugly, and above all, they were all the same.
Therefore, Jimin stopped caring about them, and that was his first mistake.
“Middle aged men and why you should love them”, “The wonderful world of adult men”, “Pros and (not) cons of dating a man twice my age”.
Just a peek inside Jimin’s essay’s folder. Yes, essays.
He also makes powerpoints and presentations to show his friends regularly.
They’re not really fond of Jimin’s choice to dedicate himself to older guys, they say it’s creepy and illegal and, I mean, they’re not wrong.
It’s not like Jimin’s trying to get groomed, though. He just isn’t attracted to anyone else.
He imagines older men as creatures with a bright, warm, flowing feeling of experience running through their bodies, so comforting that wanting to be completely engulfed by it does not sound crazy at all.
It might be a little bit of a stretch, but Jimin’s imagination does what it has to.
He does keep wondering if there’s a reason behind it, behind his unrequited love for 40 year olds… The easiest answer would be his father picking up his things and disappearing back when Jimin was seven, but that’s a little too cliché, isn’t it?
Jimin likes to blame it on him being born upside down, and on his first best friend being three years older than him.
It might have also been his kindergarten teacher’s fault, he was so handsome and sweet and caring and… Or his first therapist! Always telling him to get home safely, a couple words that never failed to warm Jimin to the core.
For some reason, after his father left, Jimin felt like the men in his life were truly the best people on the planet. To be clear, they were really just doing the bare minimum, but, unfortunately, to Jimin that had always been much more than enough.
So what’s there to condemn if Jimin feels safe with them? If he needs them beside him?
He just does. He likes them.
And that’s exactly why he fell in love with his literature teacher. Because he’s so hot!!!
Or, at least, that’s what he told everybody.
He kinda lied, but for good!
His previous literature teacher was a total bitch. Jimin couldn’t even get a B with her. And it’s not like Jimin is a bad student, he excels in every subject.
Therefore, he felt terribly ashamed when she recommended him taking private lessons. And particularly annoyed, too.
Eventually he did take them though, anything for good grades! And it turned out to be a great decision.
Every Tuesday he used to walk 12 minutes to the library to meet up with a teacher his mom had chosen out of LinkedIn, or something like that. The only information he had about him was him being a guy, and him being thirty something.
He then found out he was handsome, too. And married. And a dad. But that comes along later…
The very first time he saw him, he was wearing a greyish shirt, all buttoned up, and a pair of black pants. He had thin glasses shining under the sunlight as he was sitting at the big table near the window, busy on his laptop.
«Is this Min Yoongi?» Jimin asked politely, with a heavy bag in his hands.
«Oh, yes.» He stood up, and Jimin was able to take a better look. «It’s me.»
He wasn’t much bigger than him, maybe an inch taller, same physique. He was rather small compared to other people his age, but his gaze had something in it that felt immensely mature.
Jimin smiled and put his bag down, ready to start his lesson.
«So you must be Jimin.» He had a deep voice.
«Park Jimin, yes. Thank you for your help.»
Jimin wasn’t really paying that much attention to him, trying to get his stuff out of the bag.
«You don’t look like you need private lessons, Jimin. How come?»
«Teacher’s a bitch. Can’t do anything about it.»
Yoongi chuckled, «Woah, language.»
Jimin looked up with his usual puppy eyes and whispered an apology.
The first lesson was great, they talked about themselves and the reasons why Jimin was not getting his usual A+s.
«Shall we get to know each other before we start?»
«Sure, do you give private lessons often?» Jimin wasn’t even trying to hide how interested he was, so he wanted to be the one asking questions.
«I do, when I have free time.»
«Free time? Why wouldn’t you be free?» They were sitting across from each other, so Jimin leaned forward to get closer.
«What do you mean?» He chuckled again, awkwardly «I also have a real job, you know.»
«Mmh, got it.»
Jimin kept eye contact for as long as he could, and when Yoongi’s eyes started widening in awkwardness, he softened his gaze. He was good at this, surely.
«So, how old are you?» Yoongi asked, looking away.
«Why do you ask if you already know…» Jimin almost mumbled it, and the other looked very confused, so he just answered. «I’m sixteen.»
As previously said, the lesson went well. The second one too, and the third.
Jimin was flirting shamelessly with Yoongi, but Yoongi just chuckled it away. Everytime Jimin made an ambiguous comment, he just stared at him for a second too long, as if trying to read something behind his pupils, and then kept going with whatever they were studying.
Jimin felt ignored, but still, he wasn’t going to give up.
They stopped sitting across from each other during the second lesson, when Yoongi autonomously decided it would’ve been best if they sat on the same side, ‘to understand better’, ‘to have the same point of view’, or something along the sides. Jimin seized the opportunity, of course, and started brushing his knee against Yoongi’s anytime he had the chance.
To be clear, even though Jimin was extremely straightforward, he did acknowledge the limits.
He knew there wouldn’t be anything happening between them two, so let’s say he was just having fun. Trying not to get too attached.
During the fourth lesson, though, Yoongi told him that the library would’ve been closed the whole week after that one, for some kind of political stuff Jimin didn’t quite grasp.
«What do you mean? So we skip the lesson?» Jimin was shocked, panicking almost. How could he possibly wait two whole weeks to see him again? He clearly wasn’t even physically able to.
«Yeah, no big deal.»
«No big deal?! I need a good grade! I need that lesson!»
Yoongi started chuckling, as usual.
«Isn’t there somewhere else we could meet up?» Jimin asked, basically begging.
«Mh… I guess we could meet up at mine?»
Yoongi did not sound sure at all, and he probably regretted it right after saying it, but he still suggested going to his place, and Jimin was over the moon for that.
He said yes, and is anyone surprised, really.
Next Tuesday Jimin was ringing Yoongi’s house’s bell, all excited to get into Yoongi’s private spaces almost like his whole life depended on getting to know him on a personal level.
When Yoongi opened the door, he looked different. His black hair wasn’t gelled back, and his outfit surprisingly didn’t look like he had a corporate meeting in half an hour.
He invited Jimin inside, and kept his eyes on him as he started wandering around like a little kid. «You have a really nice house!»
It was the smallest one in a very basic American suburban neighbourhood, but still, Yoongi was pleased with the comment.
Jimin quickly found a bunch of framed photos, exposed in the living room.
There was Yoongi, and there was a woman. She was overly beautiful, shorter than Yoongi, with long black hair and big almond eyes.
In the picture, Yoongi was wearing a suit, with his hair perfectly slicked back and a huge smile on his face. The girl had a white dress on, a wedding dress.
They were getting married. They are married.
So, Yoongi has a wife.
That’s Jimin connecting the dots.
He wasn’t exactly shocked, it’s not like he didn’t consider the possibility of Yoongi having a life. But Yoongi doesn’t wear any ring, his lock screen isn’t anybody’s picture, and he turns his phone off when they start a lesson. But that might just be him being professional. Still, it felt weird.
They sat at the kitchen table.
Jimin wasn’t really in the mood for flirting that day, now sure that Yoongi wouldn’t have played along, and he kept quiet the whole time.
After a long while of Yoongi giving advice on the research paper Jimin had to submit a couple days later, and Jimin just humming in response, Yoongi’s brows started furrowing a little.
«Are you okay, Jimin?»
«Yeah, I’m fine. Why do you care?» Without meaning to, he sounded a bit too harsh.
Yoongi scanned his annoyed face for a long moment.
«Alright. We’re done for today.»
«Huh? Why? We still have fifteen minutes.»
«You’re not following me. Either you tell me what’s wrong or we’re done with the lesson.»
They stared at each other for a while, and then Jimin sighed, «It’s nothing. I’m just… I’m fine.»
Yoongi stood up and moved towards the fridge, «You know, Jimin…» he started filling a glass with water «I think I know the kind of person you are.»
Jimin was boringly resting his head on his palm, scribbling on his notebook «What kind of person am I?»
«You think I haven’t noticed you flirting with me?»
Jimin’s head snapped up, and his heart sank in embarrassment.
There was a moment of silence, before Yoongi sat back down in front of him.
«I mean, I appreciate it, don’t get me wrong.» What? «And maybe I did flirt back once or twice,» He did what? «But, it has to be clear that I’m just your teacher. Nothing more.»
Jimin was confused. Speechless, and deeply confused.
And, as if that wasn’t enough, his understanding of the sentence had stopped at ‘I did flirt back once or twice’.
Oh, Jimin…
«I didn’t even notice you flirting back.» There was disbelief in his tone and a very clear sparkle in his eyes.
«That is… not the point.»
Jimin leaned forward «That means you like me?»
«Jimin, what are you…»
«Do you like me?»
«What the hell» Yoongi pushed his chair back, loudly, the water spilling out of the glass and on Jimin’s notes. He stood up in confusion, probably questioning how whatever he said had led to whatever was happening. «What’s wrong with you?»
Jimin snapped out of it, and he looked like he had come out of a trance.
«A minute ago you were all moody because I have a wife and now you’re all over me? Seriously, what…»
Jimin was mortified, he freaked him out without even realising «I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to overstep, I don’t know what’s gotten into me…» He murmured, looking truly surprised at his own behaviour.
Yoongi sighed, «Jimin, please, don’t make things worse.»
Okay, time to shut up.
«I’m just gonna go.» Jimin started picking up his things, getting ready to leave, feeling the air a bit too sharp for him to stay there even a little longer.
«Wait, I’ll help you–» He was cut off.
«No thanks, I’m going. Thank you for the lesson.» Jimin put his backpack on and quickly walked to the door, ignoring how fast his heart was beating and how little air was getting into his lungs.
Yoongi was left in the kitchen, feeling even more hazy than before. He ran his fingers through his hair trying to recollect his thoughts, but all he could say was «Get home safely, please.»
Jimin froze in the hallway, those had always been his favourite words.
He looked back at Yoongi and heard him murmuring ‘I’m sorry’.
Then Jimin walked home.
He hasn’t heard about Yoongi since then.
Or, better, he hadn’t.
He hadn’t heard about Yoongi until he showed up in his classroom, presenting himself as the new literature teacher.