Work Text:
4AM May 29, 2025
Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras na ako nakaupo sa labas ng airport- sa harap ng bus terminal- pero siguro matagal na din. It's been a while since the plane I was on landed sa Clark International. Siguro mahigit na isang oras na din akong nakatunganga sa labas.
And then, there was a flash. It wasn't lightning striking. It was a camera flashing. When I turned my head, nakita ko siya, bitbit ang isang malaking camera na pang photographer. Her dark hair was tied and tucked inside a black Ferrari cap, and she was decked in black yoga pants and an oversized black hoodie. May malaking backpack din siya sa tabi niya.
"Ay, akala ko estatwa."
"It's rude to take pictures of strangers. Delete mo."
"Luh. Eh parang si Mama Mary ka ngang nakatunganga eh."
I wasn't really in the mood to banter with a stranger. "Pwede ba? Delete mo na, please."
She stared at me for a while. She was sitting a few seats away from me and then she stood and took the seat right next to mine. "Sorry. Kanina ka pa kasi nandito. Nung dumating ako, nandito ka na. Naiwan ka din ba ng bus?"
Kumunot noo ko. "Bus?"
She scratched her cap. "Papuntang Baguio. I checked online and there's supposed to be one at four. Akala ko I was late lang kaya I'm waiting for the next one."
"Hindi naman ako pupuntang Baguio."
"Eh bat ka andito? Kanina pa may dumadating ng bus di ka naman sumasakay."
I pursed my lips. How was I supposed to answer the question? "It's my birthday today."
Tumaas ang kilay niya. Halatang di nya na expect yung sinabi ko. "Oh, edi happy birthday. Pero bakit ka andito? Do you have a flight somewhere? May susundo ba sayo? Ano ba ang trip mo at bakit sa terminal mong naisip idiwang ang kaarawan mo?"
Napabuntong hininga ako. "Hindi ko alam. I just...I wanted to disappear. I booked a flight. Dito ako napadpad."
She took my answer and mulled over it for a while before nodding her head slowly. "Okay. Edi punta tayo Baguio. Wala ka namang plano? Samahan mo na lang ako."
"I don't even know you."
"Eh kasi, you never asked for my name."
I let out a soft scoff at her answer. "What's your name?"
"Akim."
"Seryoso?"
Napangiti siya. "Anadrome. But baka sakaling ma mispronounce mo at mapa-sayo ako."
Akim. Akin. Huh. Bolera. “Alam mo, the polite response would be to give me your name too, hindi yung titigan mo ko ng ganyan. Alam ko naman na maganda ako, you don’t have to be so obvious about it.”
I wondered for a brief moment if I should tell her my name. Nung bata ako, palaging sinasabi sa akin ng magulang ko wag ibigay ang pangalan ko ng basta-basta. Lalo na sa mga taong hindi ko kilala. “ Rory. Rory ang pangalan ko.”
It wasn’t exactly a lie. Rory could be my nickname. Isa yun sa mga hiling ko na sana meron ding tumawag sa akin ng ganung palayaw. Aurora was a mouthful and too demure. But demure was a branding I was forced to have. Demure, respectful, polite. Isang Maria Clara sa mundong mas mainam na maging isang Gabriela Silang.
I expected her to say something in response but bigla siyang tumingala at kumislap yung mga mata niya. Ang laki ng ngiti niya, na para bang may nakita siyang kakilala niya. She must’ve been from here. Tsaka baka may kasama din siya papuntang Baguio. Baka siguro isa siyang extrovert na mahilig mag-adopt ng introvert.
Pero bigla siyang ngumuso sa isang direction. “Ayun, bubukas na ata yung ticketing. Halika na, bumili na tayo, Rory. Kung yun talaga yung pangalan mo.”
“Ayaw mong maniwala?”
She shrugged. “Hindi naman sa ayaw ko. I just get the sense na you’re treading the waters cautiously. Pero wag kang mag-alala. I’m not some kind of still water that will swallow you whole or have brain-eating amoeba or kung ano mang bullshit na napapanuod mo sa mga TV series. Gusto ko lang pumunta sa Baguio. Kumuha ng mga litrato at ilagay yun sa portfolio ko.”
And just when she said the last sentence, she looked away, na para bang may gustong siyang idugtong pero piniling ituldukan na lang. “Kung yan yung gusto mo, you want me to come with you because?”
“Because anong gagawin mo dito? Tumunganga until the sun rises and sets? I mean, if yan din yung trip mo, then fine. To each her own. If that’s how you want to celebrate your birthday, knock yourself out. Pero I’m just offering. In case gusto mong may kasama ka sa kaarawan mo, kahit taong hindi mo kilala. You might be surprise na minsan, ang kailangan lang natin ay isang araw na hindi natin alam kung anong gagawin, at kung sino ang kasama natin.”
She stood up from her seat right after she said that and left me alone on the chairs. I watched as she lined up to buy herself a ticket. Narinig kong the bus will be arriving in an hour. I contemplated. Wala din kasi akong dalang kahit ano. Ang tanging dala ko lang ay ang wallet ko at phone, at clip para itali ang buhok ko. Ni isang panid ng damit wala.
Nakabili na si Akim ng ticket niya at napatingin siya sa akin. “Oh? Bakit parang iiyak ka?”
“Wala kasi akong dalang damit…” I said, looking down at the outfit I was wearing. Naka-linen pants lang ako at white shirt. I literally just got out of bed on the eve of my birthday, went to the airport, and bought the flight that was available. That flight brought me to Clark, Pampanga. Kahit toothbrush, wala din.
Natawa si Akim at umiling na lang. “Cute mo. Parang hindi pwedeng bumili ng damit dun ah. Besides, I don’t plan on staying there longer than 24 hours. Kung may mangyari man at kailangan mong magpalit, may SM naman dun. May ukay din if gusto mo ng mura. Yun nga lang, baka may Sadako na naka-kapit.”
Napakunot yung noo ko sa sagot niya. “Yan pa yung naiisip mo on second-hand clothes? Hindi yung marumi siya o-,”
“Alam mo, kung bumili ka na lang kaya ng ticket mo? Maubusan ka pa dyan, dito ka talaga magce-celebrate ng kaarawan mo.”
I huffed, but found myself standing up and heading to the ticket counter to buy myself one. In a flash, nasa tabi ko ulit si Akim. “Pwede bang tabi kami miss? Number 17 yung seat ko. Kanina parang wala pa naman akong katabi nung nagpalista.”
Binigay sa akin yung listahan para isulat ko ang pangalan ko. Tinuro ni Akim kung saan niya sinulat yung kanya at ngiting-ngiti sa akin, waiting for me to write down my name next to hers. Napailing na lang ako. Why was I following a stranger? Wasn’t I digging myself a hole by doing so?
Still, kahit na may mga bumabagabag sa akin, I paid for the ticket and waited for the bus to arrive, with Akim sitting right next to me na. She had white headphones on and was scrolling through TikTok on her phone. I didn’t have the guts to open mine. I already put it on DND after all. Iiwan ko nga sana kung hindi ko nga lang kailangan kasi baka kailanganin ko at some point.
Nung dumating yung bus, sumunod na lang ako kay Akim paakyant. Sa aming dalawa, siya lang yung may dalang bag. There was a small part of me that wanted to offer help but opted not to. Hindi naman kami close. I couldn’t even wrap my head around the fact that I was literally going on a day trip to Baguio with a stranger. Pero mukhang hindi naman siyang masamang tao.
“Gusto mo yung window seat?” Tanong niya sa akin.
“Hmm? Diba sayo yun? Tsaka baka you’d want to take pictures of the sceneries.”
“Oo, akin yun. Pero baka gusto mo ding matulog. Dalawang oras lang naman yung biyahe but if you want to be comfortable, I don’t mind sitting sa aisle.”
She was thoughtful, that much I had noticed in all the interactions we’ve had, kahit na nagse-segue siya from time to time ng jokes. I motioned for her to go in first. I didn’t mind naman not having the window seat tsaka sa kanya talaga yun. She nodded her head and settled in first, and when I settled next to her, nabigla ako nung bigla niya akong abutan ng jacket.
“Extra ko yan, in case na ma-enjoy ko yung Baguio at magstay ako dun longer than I intended or kung madumihan yung suot ko ngayon. Pero gamitin mo na muna. Wala ka talagang dala kahit ano. I don’t want you getting cold there,” she muttered as she adjusted her headphones and leaned her head against the window. “Two hours itong byahe na ‘to, in case you’ve never been in one. Pwede kang matulog. Pwede kang matulala. Your choice.”
I let out a small chuckle at her words. Akim was never forcing me to join her for this trip. It was an invitation she had extended just because. And honestly? I did appreciate it.
“Marunong ka din palang tumawa,” saad niya with a smile. “Akala ko busangot at tulala lang yung default mo.”
Inirapan ko siya but then looked at her curiously. “Bakit hindi mo ako tinatanong kung bakit ako pumunta dito sa birthday ko? Obvious naman that I literally just came here. Wala akong dala. Obviously, wala din akong kakilala.”
The bus began to move and the sky began to lighten as the sun began to rise. Beside me, Akim looked thoughtful. “Is it open for discussion?”
“No.”
“Oh, eh ba’t ako tatanong kung hindi ka naman sasagot? Alam mo, ang loko mo din eh.”
Once more, I found myself smiling at how she was handling this. Handling me. Na para bang hindi naman siya naiirita sa pagbubukas ko ng onti ng pinto for her to peak it, only to close it right on her face the moment she takes a step closer.
I relaxed into my seat and let out a sigh. “This is the first trip I’ve been in for years.”
And it was. Akala ko noon, once I graduated college, the world was my oyster. But one thing led to another and I was trapped in responsibilities that I did not want or ask to carry. What should have been obligations that I could joyfully do became burdens that broke me in ways I never realized. Hanggang sa isang araw, napatingin na lang ako sa salamin at hindi na kilala kung sino yung tumititig sa akin.
“Have you ever been to Baguio?” Akim asked.
I shook my head. “Hindi. Maganda ba dun?”
“Sakto lang. It’s not majestic or breathtaking. What it is, though, is alive. ”
There was a smile on her face when she said that pero may multo ng lungkot ang mga mata niya that quickly disappeared when she blinked. “Kaya ba gusto mo dun pumunta? To take pictures of a city that’s rife with life?”
Akim inhaled deeply and let the breath out loudly. “I guess you could say that.”
8:23AM
The conversation died at that because for some reason, her last statement held a finality to it, like she didn’t want to add anything further to it pa. Eventually, nakatulog ako sa tabi ni Akim. Siguro pagod talaga ako. I don’t think I slept a wink last night. Parang nagbihis lang ata ako pagdating ko ng condo at tumungo na agad sa airport. I didn’t even sleep sa plane. And since then, just like when Akim found me, nakatunganga lang talaga ako sa terminal.
But I fell asleep right next to her and nung gumising ako dahil tinatapik-tapik niya ako, my head was resting on her shoulder. “Ay ano ba yan, tumulo pa laway mo sa jacket ko.”
My eyes widened. “Ano?! Hala, sorry! Sorry talaga-,”
Akim laughed loudly. “Joke lang! Eto naman, hirap biruin. Lika na, baba na tayo. Pipila pa tayo para bumili ng ticket para bukas ng umaga.”
I followed her out of the bus. “Bibili ka na ng ticket pabalik? Paano kung you want to stay here longer?”
“Edi itatapon.”
I stared at her in disbelief. “What? Sayang ang pera, Akim!”
“What is money? Paper only. What is money kung hindi gagastusin?”
“Ano bang klaseng mindset yan!”
“Shh, God will provide, Rory.”
“Ano ba?!”
“Mag-amen ka!”
God, this woman was infuriating but endearing. I had no choice but to follow her sa ticketing counter again, lining up right behind her. I watched as she took pictures of those waiting sa terminal, and watching her work behind the lenses of her camera, the way she captured the people half-asleep, tulala, and taking shots of each of them made me wonder why she took portraits of people doing the most mundane things. Akala ko, there was art in photography but where was the art in the most mundane things?
Bumili kami ng ticket namin pabalik ng Clark bukas. 5AM yung schedule. Pagkatapos nun, nasa labas na kami ng terminal. Biglang nawala si Akim sa tabi ko and I suddenly felt anxious nung hindi ko siya mahanap. Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin.
Maya-maya, bumalik siya, may dala-dalang taho. Ngiting-ngiti pa siya pero hinampas ko. “Bakit mo ko iniwan!”
“Luh. Ilang oras pa nga lang tayong magkasama, clingy ka na?” She handed me a cup of pink taho. “Ayan, inumin mo yan. Baka mawala yung init ng ulo mo. Ganda-ganda ng klima dito pero init-init ng ulo mo.”
I glared at her but did take a sip of the taho out of the straw, noting how sweet it was. I made a face. I wasn’t a big fan of sweet and syrupy drinks. Akim immediately noticed and took the taho from my hands and handed me another one, purple this time. “Ube yan. It’s not too sweet. Baka mas suited sa panlasa mo.”
Just as I took a sip, there it was again, another flash of her camera. I glared at her for taking pictures of me but she ignored it, setting her camera down and drinking the strawberry taho that I didn’t finish. I tapped her on the shoulder. “Ako na magdadala ng backpack mo. Para parang may ambag naman ako sa trip na ‘to.”
Tumawa siya. “Wag na. Masisira yung Dora aesthetic ko kung kukunin mo. Wag ka na lang siguro magalit kung kukuhanan kita ng litrato. Yan na lang yung ambag mo.”
Akim hailed a taxi for the both of us. When we were settled in, she turned to me. “Okay, so right now, the plan is Grumpy Joe. After nun, siguro sa Session Road na lang tayo dederetso since malapit din naman, pwedeng malakad.”
“Grumpy Joe? Scenic ba yun?”
“Hindi. Pang-tyan yun. Gutom na ako. Mayaman ka ba? What if ilibre mo ako?”
I raised an eyebrow. "Libre? In my ideal world, hindi ba dapat ang birthday celebrants yung nililibre?"
"Ayan na naman sa birthday card. Hindi pa ba enough na dinala kita sa Baguio?"
"I paid for my ticket, Akim."
"And it only happened kasi I invited you to come! Yan yung birthday gift ko sayo. Yung invitation kong samahan mo ako. My presence is a present."
Napatitig lang ako sa kanya. "Alam mo, there's a fine line between being cocky and charming."
Akim nodded in agreement. "Yes, and that line has Akim written all over it.”
She was even beaming at me when she said such things. “ Libre mo ko ha? Nakakabili ka nga ng ticket papuntang kung saan in the middle of the night, for sure afford mong maglibre ng pagkain."
10:23 AM
Pagdating namin sa Grumpy Joe, we had to wait in line. Parang nasa ika-anim pa kami sa waiting list and we were stuck sitting in the waiting area. Akim was resting her head against a beam, muttering under her breath.
"Are you praying?"
Dinilat niya yung isang mata niya. "Oo. Na sana bilisan naman nila yung pagkain nila dahil may isang nilalang na ditong nanghihina."
"We had taho, Akim."
"Taho does not sustain me, Rory."
I scratched my neck in amusement. Sa dinami-dami ng mga taong nakilala ko, this was the first time I've met someone like Akim. Someone so unapologetically her.
"I'll mutter prayers with you. Pero pag tinawag na tayo, don't scream."
"Sige. Mag-cartwheel na lang ako."
"Akim!"
Finally, tinawag na din ang pangalan namin and we were seated at a table for two. Akim was quick to choose her order. Isang pizza that was good for 3 and a plate of pasta that was also for sharing. Even a side order of onion rings.
I scanned the other tables, noting how big the portions were even if it was meant for sharing so I opted not to order another. Akim noticed.
"Di ka oorder?"
"Ayaw mo bang mag share na lang? Parang ang laki naman kasi ng serving."
"Pero paano if ayaw mo ng pinili ko?"
"It's okay." I gently replied, pushing the menu away and ready to wave a waiter over. But Akim pushed the menu back to me, reached for my hand and lowered it down.
"Pumili ka ng gusto mo, Rory. You have a choice to choose naman ah." Akim said quietly, looking at me expectantly. "Besides, ikaw magbabayad. Sayang naman if you don't enjoy what you pay for."
I ended up ordering a fancy drink and dessert because Akim wouldn't order until I had food I wanted for myself. As I anticipated, we ordered too much. But Akim didn't seem to care. Ang laki-laki pa ng ngiti niya nung sinabi niyang e take out na lang namin ang pagkain.
"Iuuwi mo pa ba yan? Di ba mapapanis? Alam kong maginaw dito pero di naman 'to ref temperature," sabi ko kay Akim as I handed my card sa waiter.
"May matanda tayo kaninang nadaanan sa gilid ng kalsada. Nanghihingi. Iaabot ko na lang sa kanya. Kaya nga dinami ko yung order," she sounded sheepish when she finally admitted that. "Bigyan mo na lang ako ng bank details mo. Share na lang tayo sa bayad."
I paused at her words, staring at her. I've already noted that she was thoughtful, but compassionate was another adjective I didn't think could describe the force in front of me. She was like an onion, andaming layers.
"It's okay. At least I get to help out two charities for my birthday."
She was quick to get what I meant. "Hoy! Di ako charity case ah."
Naglakad kami papuntang Session Road. Along the way, nadaanan namin yung matanda na sinabi niya at binigay ang pagkain. And after that, she asked the old lady if she could take pictures of her, she even had the old lady do poses. I watched sa gilid. Akim was vibrant, in a way that I wish I was too.
Once more, there was a flash in front of me. I blinked, adjusting my eyes. And then Akim was right in front of me, camera in hand, face beaming. "May ngiti kasi sa labi mo. Ghost of a smile. Aminin, dahil ba yun na aliw ka sa akin at sa matanda? Ikaw ha, ilang oras pa lang tayong magkasama, you're falling for me na."
Gusto ko siyang batuhin dahil sa sinabi niya pero wala naman akong dala. Inirapan ko na lang siya at tumungo na, kahit na hindi ko alam kung saan pupunta. And then I felt her hand on mine, tugging me to the other direction.
"Dito tayo," she said softly, still holding my hand. "Medjo malayo ah. Sabihan mo lang ako pag pagod ka na."
"Bakit? You'll carry me?"
"Hindi. Para alam ko lang."
11:47 AM
We did end up sa Session Road and the whole time we walked, Akim took pictures. Minsan, I caught her taking pictures of me. I stopped minding na. At this point, half of the memory of her camera was filled with candid shots of me. She even told me to take a picture dun sa signage, iconic daw yun eh. And no matter how I complained na ayoko, I find myself complying na lang.
"Punta tayo Ililikha. It's an artists' cave." Akim began to tell me more about the place we were heading to and on our way there, biglang pumatak ang ulan. "Ay, shet! Bilisan mo, Rory! Wala tayong payong!"
She grabbed my hand, and we ran together- hands held- under the pouring rain, our laughter echoing despite the downpour and busy streets.
Narating namin yung Ililikha ng basang-basa. Akim took off her backpack and rummaged through it producing a towel that she handed to me. “May CR sa loob. Tanungin mo lang kung nasaan.”
“Paano ikaw?”
“Magpapatuyo dito.”
Kumunot noo ko. “Let’s just share this and pat ourselves until we’re dry, Akim. If you stay here, baka magkasakit ka pa. Ang ginaw ginaw tapos magpapatuyo ka lang.”
She grinned. “Uy wag kang maging masyadong concerned, baka ma-in love ako sayo. Clingy pa naman ako. Baka di mo kayang panindigan.”
Ang bilis talaga niyang makaisip ng kung anong ibabatong linya lagi. I just ignored it this time though and dragged her sa CR. Medjo maliit and we were cramped inside but we did manage to dry ourselves enough. Yung tipong hindi na talaga kami tumutulo.
Nung lumbas kami, I realized that the place was like a maze. A man-made labyrinth of art. Akim dragged me around. Sa kwarto kung saan may mga crystals and anik-anik, and while I looked around, Akim took pictures. But she was polite enough to remove the flash. I still knew she was taking stolen shots of me though. I could hear the camera clicking in my direction from time to time.
We reached a part that seemed like a theater- albeit a small one- with rows of man carved seats and benches. Walang tao dun and Akim moved to the front, standing in the middle and smiling widely and slowly- very slowly, her smile faded.
“If only everyone saw the beauty in every creative process and talent of someone else, siguro this place would be buzzing with more people noh? Hindi yung tipong creative people and those who appreciate art lang din ang may alam nito.”
“Wala bang may pumupunta dito?” I approached Akim and took a seat at the front and she just stood there, seemingly contemplating. It made me wish na sana I had her camera. She looked like she could be a muse.
“Meron naman. I just wish there were more, I guess. Yung tipong people would applaud them the same way they do sa mga kpop at ibang artista na yan. But with this as a craft, it doesn’t scream as loud as those repetitive songs or OA acting. It just demands to be felt. Kung manhid ka, oh edi kawawa ka.”
It was another layer of her unraveling: a depth of an artist that I didn’t see at first glance but seemed fitting with her character.
“You taking pictures, creating your portfolio, ano ba ang plano mo dyan? May plano ka bang gumawa ng gallery mo? Or an exhibit, perhaps?”
Akim took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, sitting down next to me. She held her camera in her hands, cradling it in a way a mother did with her newborn. As if it was the most fragile thing in the world.
“Not a lot of people see the world the way I do. Siguro masyado akong sensitive or attuned sa mundo. Sometimes it’s a blessing, most of the time it feels like a curse. But the idea of me taking pictures now and creating a portfolio out of it- maybe even an exhibit-, might just be my way for the world to finally view the world in the same lenses I do. Di ko lang alam kung parte pa ba ako ng mundo kung makikita na nila ang nakikita ko.”
Her last words piqued my curiosity. “Why wouldn’t you be? Paano makikita ng mundo if you’re not there to show it?”
The corners of her lips twitched into a small smile. “Not every artist is alive when the world finally celebrates their art.”
I nudged her. “Then pilitin mo. Ipaglaban mo. Pursue it so hard until the world finally caves in. Ako nga, you made me cave in to join you in this trip. And mundo pa kaya?”
Natawa siya at tumango but I could see the mistiness in her eyes that she was trying hard to hide. I could hear the surrender in her words and it’s not that I wanted to ignore it and feed her lines that she probably heard a million times to cheer her up. Because Akim didn’t say it out loud, so I didn’t have to give her unsolicited advice kasi she wasn’t asking for it.
The next hour was spent with Akim taking pictures of the place, of the artists na andun, of me- na akala niya siguro hindi ko napapansin-, until she finally said na we could move to the next destination.
“Gusto mo bang pumunta sa Mines View?”
“Ano ba yung nandun?”
“View. Pareho lang din naman sa kung anong makikita mo pag umakyat ka ng onti or kung nasa mataas ka ng building. Pero dun, magbabayad ka ng ten pesos.”
“Seryoso ka?”
“Dinadayo yun.”
“For that?”
“May St. Bernard dun if you want to take pictures with a dog. May ano din, pink ponies. Kung gusto mo, kuhanan kita ng picture tapos post mo sa IG lagay mo background music yung kanta ni Chapell Roan.”
“Akim, nagseseryoso ka ba sa buhay?”
“Rory, pag sineryoso kita, baka mawalan ka ng hininga.”
I sighed. At this point, I knew I was never gonna win with her in any banter we engaged in. “How are we gonna ge there?”
“May jeep papunta dun.”
“Alam mo ba kung nasaan?”
“Para saan pa yung baba at dila kung hindi gagamitin para magtanong?” She paused after saying that. “Well, may other functions din naman siya pero parang di pa ako ready for mature roles with you.”
“Akim!” I shouted, shaking my head as I followed after her- tawang-tawa lang yan sya.
I let Akim ask around until we finally reached kung nasaan ang paradahan ng jeep. She let me go in first and she followed right after, sitting right next to me. “Pag nagutom ka, hanap na lang tayo ng malapit na kainan dun.”
I just nodded and looked away, suddenly feeling tired. I realized I’ve only slept for two hours, dun lang sa bus ride. Akim tapped me gently on the shoulder. “Oh?”
“Baka na-off ka sa last joke ko ha. If we don’t play sa same team, tell me para mabawasan ko yung ganung jokes. Gusto ko lang naman makita kang ngumiti din. Sayang yung eye-smile mo if lagi kang nakakulong sa isipan mo.”
I bit my lip because for some reason, her words resonated in a way that made me wish everyone else in my world saw me in that perspective and cared enough to tune in. How was it that a person I met in less than 12 hours saw me the way I always wishes to be seen.
I looked away and leaned into her, letting my head rest on her shoulder and closing my eyes. “You can tease me as much as you want pero baka ikaw yung mahulog, Akim. I’ve been told na mahirap mag move on from me.”
Kahit na hindi ko siya nakikita, I knew she was grinning from ear to ear. “Isang araw lang, ako na ang bahalang mag move on sa susunod na sampung taon.”
Kinurot ko siya sa tagiliran and lifted my head up, turning to her direction and finally smiling. Without another word, Akim lifted her camera and took a shot of me: no longer candid, just me staring directly at her camera and finally posing a smiling shot.
“Yan. Sa totoo lang, kaya kita niyaya. Your beauty deserves to be captured in photographs. Fleeting yung moment, but pictures of you are timeless.”
“I’ve been with you long enough to finally be aware of how much of a bolera you are.”
Akim scoffed. “Shouldn’t you be honored na someone as poganda as me makes bola to you? Privilege yan, Rory.”
And there it was again, a line that I knew would let her win this round once more. If we kept tally, talong-talo talaga ako kay Akim.
1:37 PM
For the rest of the ride, tahimik na kami. Nakaidlip pa nga ako at some point. I think Akim continued taking pictures: of views, of the people na kasama namin sa jeep after asking for their permission, and again, of me. At this point, tinanggap ko na lang talaga na muse na niya ako sa byaheng ito.
We reached Mine’s View and Akim was right: view siya. Maraming tao. We took pictures with the dog and the pink kabayo, and the view of course.
“Kuhanan ko kayo,” Someone offered with a smile, tapping Akim on the shoulder and motioning at her camera. The whole time, ako lang talaga kinukunan ni Akim, kahit na I kept offering to take pictures of her din.
I saw Akim hesitate but slowly, she took the camera off her neck and handed it to the stranger and approached me. She stood right next to me: stiffed and awkward.
Kumunot noo ko at hinampas siya sa balikat. “Kanina ang kulit-kulit mo tapos ngayon, mema.”
She scratched her head. “I take pictures. I’m never the subject.”
I stared at her as she looked at me with a small frown on her face. I could help it: I laughed loudly. In front of me was someone so confident in who she was, shown in her playful words and teasing, and yet she was shy in front of her own camera.
Maybe my laughter was infectious because a smile finally broke out of Akim’s face as I threw my head back, laughing at her. Flash.
The shot was taken. The moment captured.
“Bagay kayo,” the stranger complimented as she handed Akim back the camera.
“We’re not-”
Akim cut me off. “Salamat! Can I take pictures of you at ng mga kasama mo? Photographer kasi ako…”
We ended up staying at Mines view longer than intended kasi ang daming napapayag ni Akim kuhanan sila ng litrato. All of them even told her they were excited to see her exhibit- kung papalarin man. Or kahit na ma post man lang daw ni Akim sa social media.
Akim in her element, taking pictures of strangers around her, of the bustling crowd, of the views, of people who smiled in front of the camera and candidly. She looked so happy doing what she loved and I momentarily remembered the broken artist I saw a glimpsed of earlier- it felt like a lifetime ago.
We ended up eating somewhere near Mines View, in an eatery that offered local favourites. Even there, Akim wouldn’t stop taking pictures.
“Tuwang tuwa ka ata dito ah.”
Akim was checking the pictures she’s taken while I began eating. She looked up at me and smiled. “I told you. Baguio isn’t majestic for me. Pero buhay siya.”
“Aren’t other cities the same?”
“Hmm. Oo. Buhay din naman yung hustle and bustle ng mga tao at may mga turista na din that sticks out like a sore thumb. But here, it’s not just moving. It’s breathing. Siguro sa temperature. I’m not sure. But that’s what it is for me.”
“Mind you, di lang Baguio pinuntahan ko though. This was actually my last stop,” Akim stopped herself abruptly, as if she realized she was about to say something she wasn’t ready to share just yet.
I raised an eyebrow. “Your last stop?”
“For the portfolio. The last place I wanted to take pictures of people.” It seemed like there was more to that answer than she was giving but I didn’t press. Like how she didn’t pry on why I chose to disappear for my birthday.
Silence followed that statement as the two of us focused on our food and I was reminded- for a very fleeting moment- that I was eating late lunch with a stranger even when her company felt comfortable as if her presence had been with me my whole life.
Biglang naramdaman kong sinipa nya ako sa ilalim ng lamesa. Napatingin ako sa kanya. “Aray!”
“Ang lalim na naman kasi ng iniisip mo. Try mo kayang e share o di kaya wag mag isip. Masyado kang nalulunod.”
“Bakit di mo na ako tinanong why I chose to disappear on my birthday?”
“Sasagutin mo na ba?”
Should I tell her? After this trip, pag umuwi na ako pabalik ng Cebu, pabalik sa totoong buhay ko, Akim and Baguio will be nothing more than a memory. Our paths were different. She thrived in art and photography, it seemed. My life- yung totoo- revolved around corporate.
“Gusto ko lang kasing huminga.”
Akim nodded her head solemnly. “Then take all the breaths you need in this 24 hours, Rory. Kung ayos na, kung kaya mo nang balikan, you can. Pero kung ayaw mo, stay here. Go elsewhere. Ang lawak ng mundo para makulong ka sa mundo mo.”
In the middle of a crowded kalenderya, sa harap ng taong hindi ko naman talaga kilala, I cried. For the first time sa buong buhay ko na dalang-dala ko ang bigat ng nararamdaman ko, I finally let it out in one breath.
Akim’s eyes widened pero hindi niya ako pinatahan. She looked around- at the people casting glances out way- and then stood up. Hindi naman siyang malaking tao pero she tried to cover me while I cried, na para bang may matatago niya talaga ako habang umiiyak sa isang publikong lugar.
When I wiped my tears, Akim leaned close to me and whispered, “Okay ka na ba? Kasi, baka akalain nilang nakipag-break ako sayo sa isang kalinderya. Kilala pa naman ang Baguio bilang lugar na pinupuntahan ng magjowa tapos mabe-break. Masisira branding ko dyan, Rory.”
I let out a dry chuckle as Akim scrambled to find something from her backpack. And then she handed me the towel we used kanina nung nabasa kami. “Wala kasi akong panyo. Eto lang dala ko.”
Gusto kong umiyak ulit pero dahil natatawa ako sa sitwasyon. Akim looked genuinely concerned kahit na she was trying to lighten my mood. “Okay na, Akim. Ubusin na natin ‘tong pagkain. Saan tayo next pupunta?”
“Atok, Benguet,” sagot niya, glancing at her watch. “Pero dadating tayo dun 4pm na siguro. Ikot lang tayo ang take pictures. Kaya pa naman if babalik tayo kahit na 7pm na yung byahe. Sakto lang yan for night market.”
“Anong pupuntahan natin dun?”
Inayos ni Akim ulit ang mga gamit niya. “Yung flower farm. Kung nanuod ka ng Can’t Buy Me Love ng DonBelle, alam mo yun.”
“I don’t have time to watch movies or teleseryes. Di ko nga din kilala yung DonBelle. Bagong loveteam yun?”
Akim stared at me and then shook her head in amusement. “Jusko. Welcome sa mundo, Rory. Sana dahil na humakbang ka na para tahakin ‘to, ituloy-tuloy mo na kasi masyado kang kawawa. Kahit sikat na loveteam di mo kilala.”
4:12 PM
May van naman papuntang Flower Farm at matapos naming kumain ni Akim sa kalenderya, hinanap na namin ito at sumakay na papuntang dun- but we made sure na may byahe pa pabalik. I fell asleep sa byahe, and at some point, Akim did too. Buti na lang ginising kami ng mga nakasama namin sa byahe at nakababa kami sa farm.
My eyes widened when we entered the fields. Sobrang ganda. When I turned to look at Akim, she was already taking pictures of the whole place. I feel like I could say na sobrang ganda ng lugar a thousand times but it will never give it the justice it deserved.
“Huy, bakit parang naiiyak ka?” Tanong ni Akim sa akin.
I turned to her and wiped the tears away from my eyes. “Wala. Overwhelmed lang. Sobrang ganda kasi. I didn’t expect to stumble upon something so beautiful.”
“Di mo siguro natingnan sarili mo sa salamin,” Akim muttered but turned away, taking more pictures of the scene, and even the people na andun din tulad namin.
Akim and I strolled around, her taking pictures from her camera, and me doing the same with my phone. Naka-DND pa din ako. At some point, the two of us moved in different directions. I didn’t mind. Akim wouldn’t leave naman without me.
Siguro fifteen to twenty minutes din yung nakalipas pero muli kaming nagtagpo ni Akim kung saan napaligirin kami ng sunflowers. All of them facing the direction where the sun was slowly setting. When I saw Akim, she had a bouquet of assorted flowers in hand. Binigay niya sa akin.
“Happy birthday, Rory.” It was a greeting the echoed the same sentiments she said kaninang umaga sa bus terminal but it no longer held the same tone. Walang pagtataka. Walang panunumbat. The first- and only- genuine greeting I’ve heard all day.
But just as I reached for the flowers she offered, she took a shot of me doing so. “Masaya ka ba?”
I paused at her words just as I was about to smell the flowers she gave me. Masaya ba ako? I left home because I wanted to disappear, only to be seen through the camera lens of a stranger I met sa bus terminal.
Masaya ba ako? Tatlong salitang tanong that no one in my life ever asked because they simply assumed that I was.
“Oo.”
Because I was. In that moment, I was. In a way I never felt for a while now.
“Handa ka na bang umuwi?”
And I faltered at the question, glancing at my watch to look at the time. It was almost 6PM. As per the plan, babalik kami ng Baguio by seven and arrive there by 9. Pupunta kami ng Night Market and then siguro by 1 or 2AM, pupunta na kami ng terminal to wait for the bus.
And then babalik kami ng Clark and I have to fly back to Cebu, to the life I chose to run away from for 24 hours.
Unless one of us wants to stay a little longer.
“What happens if I ask for another 12 hours, or for another day?”
Akim took a deep breath, a shadow of a smile on her face. The playful Akim wasn’t there at the moment. I was faced with the version of her I met sa Ililikha.
“Pupunitin natin yung ticket natin pabalik. Maghahanap ng matutuluyan. Pwede din tayong magpalipas ng gabi dito,” Akim told me gently. “Pwede kung gusto mo, Rory.
“Pero pwede nga ba?”
My birthday only lasted for twenty-four hours and disappearing the way I did still meant it was a borrowed time from my usual timeline. Kung pipiliin kong manatili kung nasaan ako, paano naman ang buhay na naghihintay sa akin?
Yung pamilya ko. Yung trabaho ko. Yung deadlines that I was meant to meet for this day but disregarded. Meetings na hindi ko na puntahan. Responsibilities na kailangan kong harapin kahit ayaw ko namang tingnan.
Rory could choose to let it go.
But Aurora had to go home.
I didn’t have to say it out loud. Akim knew. So rather than pressing for an answer, she reached for my hand, held her camera, and took a picture of me while the sun set in the backdrop.
7 AM May 30, 2025
I had to leave. The flight I booked left in an hour and sobrang sakto lang ng dating ng bus sa terminal sa airport.
“Thank God I didn’t have to rebook,” I muttered as Akim and I got out of the bus.
“Ito naman, mayaman ka naman. Spare change lang siguro para sayo yang ticket mo,” Akim said lightly. Halatang pagod sya. Nakatulog naman kami sa bus pareho but two hours of sleep after all the gala we did sa Baguio wasn’t enough time to rest.
Umakyat kami papunta sa departure. Akim insisted na ihatid ako. “Alam mo, ikaw pala yung clingy. Ayaw mo kong iwan eh.”
“Kung pwede ka nga lang itakas sa buhay mo at mapanatili dito, edi sana may kasama akong mag food trip sa Koreatown dito.”
I smiled. Kahit na ang iksi ng panahon na magkasama kami, we grew attuned and accustomed to each other right then.
“Will you invite me to your exhibit?”
Akim held her camera close. “Give me your email. I want to make sure that I can in the future.”
She handed me her phone and I typed in my email sa notes app nya, no longer caring the it showed my real identity. I already spent an entire day with the person. Hindi talaga siya masamang tao.
We were by the door sa papasok sa departure at this point and we stood there, awkwardly, unsure what we were supposed to do now that it was finally time for goodbye.
I bit my lip, taking in a deep breath and looking at the girl who spent my birthday with me- isang buong 24 hours-, and I wasn’t sure if I actually wanted to say goodbye to her.
Akim lifted her camera. “When it flashes, pumasok ka agad.”
And I did as she told me. When the camera flashed, I stepped inside the airport and the doors closed between us: a goodbye that wasn’t said in words.
10:23 PM May 30, 2025
From: [email protected]
Subject: Aurora
Dear Rory-
Ampanget.
Parang hindi ko naman branding. It’s me. Akim. Wag mo na lang pansinin ang totoong pangalan ko. Masyado syang kikay for my aesthetic.
Anyways, I’ve had time to look through the pictures I took on our trip. I’ve attached some that you might want. Baka gusto mong mag birthday dump. Taray, nakapag photoshoot ka pala nung birthday mo. Sa Baguio pa. Libre pa! (Bayaran mo ko ha? Mahal TF ko.)
I also wanted to inform you that I did manage to book a place willing to showcase my recent portfolio. Akala ko it would take a while. Surprisingly, some strings were pulled and all I have to do is have the pictures developed and blown up at e display. Akalain mo yun? Ganun lang ka simple. I’ll send you another email kung na settle na ang lahat.
But aside that, I thought I wouldn’t get to witness my own exhibit. When I said that Baguio was my last stop for my portfolio, it was my last stop until I finally end things for myself, Rory.
But I saw you. And I met you. And while you didn’t intend to, while you were drowning in your own still waters, you pulled me out of mine without knowing. Di ko din alam paano.
Ang alam ko lang, Baguio is a city that felt alive. And witnessing it with you made me want to live again too.
Wala ka naman masyadong ginawa sa totoo lang. Puro reklamo ka pa nga. But you wanting to disappear made me want to be present more in this lifetime. Twenty-four hours with you made me want to spend twenty-four more hours in this world…
Hanggang sa magtagpo muli ang tadhana natin.
Kung pagbibigyan man tayo muli- kung papayag ka-, I hope I get to spend more than just 24 hours with you. More than a day. In places other than Baguio. I wish I got to know more of who you are- kung si Rory man o Aurora, kung sino mang version ng sarili mong gusto mong ipakilala.
Hanggang sa muli.
Warmth in flashes,
Akim. (Pero pwedeng pwede mong angkinin.)