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hi my name is johnny… jony jojo and this… is my story!
it was a beautiful summer of 91 in poland. i was on my way home from school, and i was obvious;sy on my phone (im rich and my dad works in motorola) I was talking to my friend, who shall not be named for now… So, i was riding on my bike which was super fast and shiny and new type shit. So i was taking a shortcut throuygh this fuckass skatepark with some stupid kids or something. i was going super fast on my super fast bike and whoops!!! i ran into some fucing loser! my bike stopped, obviously and the kid fell on his back. woah, i better check if he is still alive or something… i went up to him and checked his pulse. i mean, i would if i knew how to. i just touched his neck and prayed that he was alive. when i was trying to strangle him to get rid of anyt evidence he grabbed my hand as pulled me close
“what do you think you are doing, brokey?!” i screamed as he touched me “ let me go!!!”
he just stared deep into my soul, his emerald green eyes drilling holes in my my very being. after a while he finally let me go… what will happen next!!!
Chapter 2: hm... who was this guy?
Summary:
the guy who was hit by a bike is reaviling some bizaare thing...s...
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so after this guy was staring at me AND finally letting me go... i got bored of him so i backed away
"hey looooser!!! watch out where youre going next time!" i dusted off my guccciii jacket and pulled up my balenciaga pants up "i cpould have killed you!"
he just stood up and looked at me, he was probably tinking of a weay tpo pay m,e back for almost breaking all 206 bones in his ugly white boy body. i got bacxk on my bike and drove away. i mean, i wopuld if i coukld. there was some fuckass vine holding my bike down... erm.. what the sigma? i looked atr him i actually dont know why, maybe he helkd the key to this bizzare puzzle... anyways i looked down and arem it kinda looked like my leg was broken? whoah calm down liberal there is nothingb broke in me!! cuz im kinda rich and my dad worjks for motorala and myt mother (before she dissapearded ) wokrekd in the pepsicco so erm we are quite rich fellas
"do you... need any help with this?" the loser looked down at my leg and seemed kinda worried about my current conditipn "you dont look like you can walk on your oown right now"
i mean... he was kinda right. my leg was hurting like craazy. i just notiecd that. so i screamed YEOWCH like tom and herry and fell down on the ground. despite this boy being hit by me and being nothing more than an innocent participant in this whole fiasco he rushed towards me to lend me a shoulderl
hmm... im thinkinmg...
so he lifted me up in his arms and carried me to the nearest hospital...
TO BE CONTINED?????
Chapter 3: im the evil guy who is evil, guys
Summary:
johnny jojo goes to a hospital and well... he gets hospitalized LOL!
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i thinkn i fainted whenm this guy held m,e up in in his arms or something cuz the next thing i rmemeber is waking up in my bed. i mean, its not mine cuz it was a hospital bed... but it was assigned to me so it was kinda mine. i tried getting up to check if my wallet was still there but... i fell over and smacked my head against the bedframe. whoops! THE LOUD NOISE OF MY SKULL ALMOST CRACKING OPEN must have alerted the staff cuz as soon as i hit the ground the door opened "so... youre" the guy checked his notes "johnny.... jo..? jojo?" i looked at him up from the ground as i tried to get back on my bed, but my absolutely massacred leg didnt allow me to "yeah, thats what everyone calls me. my parents do, at least." i paused "at least i think they are my parents. they just kinda live in the same house as me.. we just-" he stopped me from finishing myt sentence by walking out of the room. rude, but thats what peasents do i guess. after a few more tries of stanfding up i fell over AGAIN as the door opened AGAIN. this time some guy walked in. i mean at first i thought it was a herd of zebras. it smelled like unwashed horse ass and it looked like a road kill version of a zebra. so... you cnat really blame a guy for thinking that way? 😅 "so, youre the guys who ran over that other guy.. or something?" wow, he truly has a way with words "erm i mean, he was just standing there... adn who the holy macaroni are you? the latest dissolutioonof the soviet union type shit?" huh? why did i say that... this is quite bizzare... the fashion icon just looked at me in confusion. it seemed like he was as stunned as i was. well, anyways i have to fiunaly check if my wallet wa there. hm... okay, let me try again... "who are you and what are you doing in a hospitakl?" i forgot to ask him that btw, he didnt seem like a staff member... i checked my pocket again but my wallet was still not present... okay, this is getting ridiciuols! "hey, where the fuck is my wallet?!?!" i would get up if i could so i just threw a pillow at him instead. he dodged, maybe cuz i was not even trying to hit him. more like... a signal for him to back away. so the door opened FOR THE THIRD FUCKASS TIME adn this time someone that looked like he (or they) (i didnt want to assume the doctors pronons) walked in "so, mister Mirek Chakalaka... and this is your..." "yeah thats my younger brother" what the barnacles is he yapping about?! he just looked at me and let the doctor speak "so your brother has absolutly no chance of getting his leg back, sorry. we didnt even try cuz we dont gaf
Chapter 4: the lake of sorrow and depression
Summary:
ssoooo johnny jojo finds out he might lose a leg and every single bone in his body...... what???????!!!!!
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"WHAT what do you mean i might lose my leg??? i just hit someonne with my bike???" this fuckass doctor was insane. my leg was fine so what was he even yapping about?? I mean, it was kinda broken BUT not to the pount of cutting it off??? the weirdo who was here with me also seemed to agree
"hey, my brother just has a broken leg, its not that big of deal, right? just give him some painkillers or whatever and we will leave" WOW he was right for once in his life it seemed. i nodded my head
the doctor sighed
"okay.. if you wnat to leave ill prepare some documents and we will let Johnny go" he left za room
i was left alone with this zoo robber guy. wh
vro i will finish ts later BYYYYEEEE
Chapter 5: ewrms wayt the sigma
Summary:
oghug im jerklig off
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sooo i was jorking it and THIS OS NOT TEALTEWD and i think melpone is ada goaaaat and kowk im gonna suck his toaes NOO this nor y tunmblr btrb chzt]
Pareidoliateeth on Chapter 1 Sun 20 Jul 2025 06:56AM UTC
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AdConcidat on Chapter 1 Tue 19 Aug 2025 08:34PM UTC
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RatKween11 on Chapter 3 Wed 21 May 2025 12:11AM UTC
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ChronicallyOnline1_1 on Chapter 4 Sun 25 May 2025 05:02PM UTC
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