What You Care to Die For?

Izuku hadn't known who his grandfather was growing up. Really, he hadn't known his grandfather at all. His first conversation with the man didn't come until he was four years old and happened to get home right as his mom was having one of her rare phone calls with him. He hadn't known that he was who Izuku had gotten his strange hair color from until Mom realised she'd never shown him what his grandfather looked like. He didn't know the mans name, where he lived, where he worked, how old he was. Nothing.

From what he gathered in the few following years, Mom barely knew him either. He didn't have a heavy presence in her upbringing and they only spoke because it was apparently what adults were supposed to do.

(Izuku wished she would have put plesentries aside the second the man chose to not be a father. He was sure Mom would agree if she knew what her decision would lead to.)

He didn't meet the man in person until he was seven and grieving. He didn't remember much from that time period. He didn't want to. His grandfather, who insisted on being referred to as "Sensei", ended up taking him in shortly after their meeting. Within the first week, he learned that Sensei was somehow strict and absent simultaneously. Izuku saw him on rare occasions but received direct and harsh rules with little to no leeway. He was to eat very specific foods, go to bed at a very specific time, dress daily regardless of what he was doing, keep up with his chores, have a strict hygiene routine, and so on. "And so on" was... darker than it sounded, but he didn't want to get into it. Going outside of his wishes was quickly learned to be a bad idea.

Izuku was no stranger to harsh parenting. He was raised by Midoriya Hisashi, someone he couldn't quite force himself to hate despite overwhelming reason to, for five years before he walked out on them. In the beginning, he was just grateful that his punishments didn't include harsh hands being laid on him and a crying mother to comfort. That gratefulness drained quickly, but his naitivity was nice while it lasted. Sensei's smiles and sickly sweet words made Izuku ill in a way that Hisashi's anger-filled face and balled fists never could. They didn't fill him with terror, just dread and a gross acceptance of his circumstances.

Sensei wasn't the only new figure in Izuku's life, though— one barely-there man couldn't raise a seven year old alone. Somebody else was referred to as Izuku's caretaker. Kurogiri was hard to explain. Izuku's wouldn't know the truth about him until years later, but he always knew that something wasn't right. Despite that, he did truly care for Kurogiri and liked to believe that the affection was returned. The man provided his food and schooling, and was the one who most helped him adjust to the change. He was a comforting presence that Izuku trusted to keep him safe from everything outside of Sensei (Kurogiri never helped if it meant defying Sensei.)

(Maybe he was under strict rules too.)

The other new figure was one Izuku didn't exactly hit it off with. Shigaraki Tomura hated Izuku from the moment he laid eyes on him. Izuku, even at his young age, understood that the contempt was bred purely from jealousy. Tomura craved Sensei's attention and validation in a way that Izuku never would, and seeing Sensei so easily give it to somebody else was apparently upsetting enough to lead to countless half-hearted murder attempts. Izuku became unphased by such frequent threats on his life after only a few months once it finally clicked that Kurogiri would keep Tomura from doing any permanent damage. Izuku just avoided the older and tried not to do anything that might set him off. He could work around an explosive pre-teen.

Honestly, Izuku felt he was barely phased by the abrupt shift in the people around him. He was too focused on Mom and home to pay any care to the danger he now faced. As far as he knew, this was normal. He knew that Hisashi was bad because he hurt him. Sensei had yet to lay a finger on him with the intent to injure, and Tomura was a completely different story. If Tomura was bad, then Kacchan was bad, and most of his old classmates were aswell. Kids were held to a different standard than adults, he knew. If they weren't, Kacchan would've gotten in trouble for his actions. And Kurogiri had done nothing wrong as far as Izuku could tell. So, really, it wasn't that bad. He chalked his feelings about the situation up to grief and tried to feel okay.

He stopped being able to lie to himself eventually, of course, but it was a gradual enough shift that he still spent years accepting it all as okay. It was only after he heard Tomura's full story that he worked out how bad their situation really was.

The story was, surprisingly, told to him by Tomura during one of their first ever moments of peace. It was after Izuku had worked out that the only ways to get on the other's good side were video games and praise. He offered to play with Tomura when he overheard the older complaining about how a game he wanted was only available as a two-player, which only earned him a glare and murder attempt until a day later when Tomura begrudgingly invited him to his room. Tomura wasn't the best when it came to social skills and understanding what was and wasn't an appropriate topic of conversation, so Izuku was quick to learn a heaping pile of traumatizing information. He went from telling Izuku about a video game character he liked to reminiscing on his first near death experience. From laying out why hot food was gross to detailing his first intentional murder.

He didn't talk much about his life before Sensei, but it wasn't a secret either. Izuku knew the vague details about his families deaths and what certain members were like. He knew that Tomura's contempt for heroes came from the days he spent wandering the streets without anybody offering to help him. He knew that the boy's grandmother was a hero whom he'd never gotten to meet, and that his father resented her more than anything. He even knew that Tomura's hair wasn't always the pale blue it now was, and that his quirk manifested late enough that Izuku grew suspicious.

When he put the pieces together and determined that Tomura's past seemed all too convenient, he started questioning the rest of their lives. He could say with some confidence that Mom's end wasn't planned, because he really couldn't find any motivation for that. Izuku was just a convenient choice. Anyone else may have taken a bit more work, but he wasn't worth the hassle. Sensei would've chosen somebody with a strong quirk or some perfect, dramatic backstory. Izuku didn't have either.

He also eventually learned the truth about Sensei. He learned his real name — or, his real fake name, rather. He learned bits and pieces of his past from reading into every word spoken during their brief conversations. He hoarded every bit of information like it was his birthright– which, in a way, it was. There wasn't much to go off of with him, but the label of Villain screamed too loudly for Izuku to overlook. When he was teleported into a warehouse straight from a sci-fi movie, mad scientist and all, and shown his grandfathers new apperence after a long stretch of silence from him, it wasn't hard to guess where the injuries had come from. Still, seeing him with wounds that looked fresh despite being months old covering his face was a horrifying experience that he'd rather forget. He still remembered Tomura's shocked face and the way he hadn't even protested when Izuku grabbed onto his arm. He remembered Sensei's barely conscious state and Kurogiri's perfectly expressionless apperence. He remembered seeing what felt like hundreds of wires and tubes sticking out of and onto Sensei's body, and the rythmatic beeping that made him remember things he'd rather forget.

It took a long time for Sensei to even be able to get out of bed again, and he never fully recovered. Sensei had explained what happened to them, clearly expecting them to take his side and abandon any attachment to heroes. It didn't work on Izuku. It did on Tomura.

It wasn't like Izuku didn't try and fight what Sensei was clearly aiming for him to be. It felt like that was all he did. It just didn't matter. Every "I refuse" was met with threats good enough to make Izuku back down in an instant. Every show of how far he was willing to go to fight back was met with them pushing him further and further until he had to give up. Everything he attempted and failed resulted in backlash serious enough that he would quit for a good amount of time. He tried everything he could think of. It didn't change anything.

As years passed, the expectations put on Izuku and Tomura grew. Their training became more vicious, their lessons darker, their punishments worse. They were almost completely separated by the time Izuku was twelve, and it was a direct consequence of his attempts to fight back. He saw Tomura once every couple of months. All he knew was that whatever brainwashing Sensei was using on the older was working. Tomura was practically the perfect puppet and completely willing to be used as such. By the time they were allowed to be around each other freely again, Izuku wasn't sure he wanted to be around him. The crushing loneliness was better than having to listen to non-stop rants about heroes and hero society that were clearly mimicked straight from Sensei's lectures. Izuku gave up on outward refusal after he lost everything. The only effective punishments left to give were ones Izuku wasn't willing to take. He had to protect what he could, and he had to pick his battles carefully.

Now, Izuku isn't dumb enough to overlook the fact that that whatever Sensei has been preparing them for is nearing. The sudden increase in their training isn't lost on him, nor is the fact that his "gifts" had suddenly been tripled. He's fifteen, plenty old enough to understand the glaringly obvious signs. When he's called to see Sensei in person, something that rarely happens anymore, he knows why.

He's standing tensely before Sensei, fighting the urge to wrap his arms around himself to ease his anxiety and trying desperately to ignore the squirming bodies tied up around them.

His arms twitch, aching for the comfort of a shitty self-hug. Sensei insists that doing that is showing weakness and that he always needs to appear like he's comfortable and in a position of power. Izuku would argue that he's physically incapable of looking comfortable or powerful, but he knows that there's no point. His hands are clasped behind his back, because he can't appear like he thinks he's better than Sensei. Powerful but submitting. He runs through all of the rules he's been given before letting himself stop when he deems his stance appropriate.

"Sensei?" he greets, because Sensei hasn't said anything yet. He's sitting on a chair in one of the warehouses, the same one he'd spent the last few years in during recovery. The medical equipment is in a separate room now that he doesn't need it 24/7, but beside his chair is still a medical machine with a couple of different functions. The only one Izuku knows of is providing oxygen through the tubes connected to Sensei's throat.

For a while after the injury, Izuku wouldn't be able to have conversations like this with Sensei. His vision was, of course, completely gone, his hearing was severely damaged, and he was only awake for short periods of time each day. Eventually, after stealing enough of the right quirks, he was able to function close to how he had before the fight. Izuku had had many discussions with the man about what quirks he might need and how to use the ones he'd obtained. Izuku would have pretended to be clueless in the subject if he hadn't already spent the time before he found out the truth ranting to Sensei about quirks and heroes. Lack of cooperation would result in punishment. Izuku wasn't willing to fight that battle.

Sensei tilts his head in what Izuku recognizes as his version of looking somebody over. He’s silent for a moment more before his mouth opens. “Give your quirks to that man,” he starts, gesturing lazily at one of the people tied up around them. Now that Izuku’s been given permission to look at them, he does.

He counts up ten people. They’re all in chairs, blindfolded and binded. He shuts off the part of brain that wants to refuse, and makes his way to the man Sensei wanted him to go to. Izuku gently sets his hand on top of the man’s, grimacing when he flinches with his whole body.

This was going to kill him.

Izuku looks back at Sensei, trying hard to find an ounce of regret or reluctance, but he finds nothing. Nothing to work with, nothing to use against him. Izuku reconsiders refusing, but the idea quickly leaves his mind. He knows exactly what Sensei will say if he does. He looks back at the man, wanting to apologize but knowing better.

The transfer only lasts for a few seconds, and Izuku shakily steps back as soon as his head stops spinning. There’s a dead man in front of him, and Izuku can’t look away.

“Listen closely,” Sensei suddenly speaks. That makes him turn. Makes him walk towards the man and away from his victim. “The woman there. The quirk I’ve given her is called Pyrokinesis. You’ve had it before, you know how it works. Take it.”

Izuku complies. The woman stays alive. He knows that won’t last.

“Next,” Izuku uses his pause to move to the next person, an older looking man. Izuku sees and hears his struggling to talk. To beg. “Devotion. You know it better than me. Take it.” He does.

“Swap. I’m allowing you to have it back. Don’t make me regret it.”

“Weak Spot. Take it.” This one is young. Maybe even a teenager. Izuku’s extra careful with him, barely even touching his hand when he takes the quirk.

“Sensory Overload. All of your senses will become stronger by a significant margin. Take it.” When he does, he immediately feels like hiding in his bed and covering his ears. His clothes feel terrible everywhere they rub against him and his injuries become significantly more painful. He tries to ignore it.

Sensei is quiet for a moment. Long enough that Izuku has to turn and make sure he’s still there as if he doesn’t hear his breathing.

“Cloud. Take it.” Izuku stares for a moment, he hasn’t had this one before. He waits for an explanation that doesn’t come. Instead he’s met with another pause.

“The next is a flight quirk without a name. You may take it.” He says it like it’s a privilege to have, Izuku’s careful when he takes it from the woman.

“Take the last two,” he says as soon as Izuku looks at him. He pauses, waiting for some sort of explanation. Even just a name. There’s nothing. He takes them silently.

His throat starts burning.

"You're getting an assignment."

Now, that could, technically, be related to Izuku's schooling, or even his analysis. He hopes it is, but he knows better. Sensei wouldn't call him here, change his quirks, and say it in that tone if it was anything as simple as that. "What— what is it?" he asks, biting his cheek to scold himself for stumbling over his words.

"You're going to be attending UA."

... huh?

"Huh?"

"Izuku," Sensei scolds quickly.

"Sorry, I mean— uhm. I'm... not sure what I mean. What do you mean 'attending UA'?"

Sensei sighs in a way that makes Izuku cringe, quickly sensing the disappointment radiating from him. "You're joining their heroics course this year."

"Why?" Izuku shifts on his feet, increasingly uncomfortable with the people listening in on their conversation.

"I'll explain more after you're accepted."

"What if I'm not?"

"You will be."

Izuku pauses to process the statement. He has no choice in the near-impossible command. What was their acceptance rate? 0.2%? And Izuku has to get in. 40— no, 36, four of them took a different exam— people got into the heroics course a year. Then there was the possibility of being expelled, which wasn't that uncommon according to his research. He's seen how the heroics courses could lose half of their class between sports festivals, and they usually lose at least one. Hell, last year class 1-A was basically nonexistent. But, regardless, he's being told he will get in, not just attempt to.

"What quirk will I be using?"

"You can choose anything you have now."

"Can I ask what the last three were?" he asks, hoping for a real answer for once.

Of course, Sensei replies, "You'll figure it out."

Izuku bites back the urge to roll his eyes and instead replies, "Understood, Sir."

"You'll apply for the entrance exam once you finish eating. You'll be applying under Midoriya Izuku, claiming to have manifested your quirk during your mother's death. Say that you attempted to register it but it apparently never went through between your transferring of guardians when they ask. You'll also tell them that your guardian's medical needs prevent them from leaving the house, but that they're available over call. Understood?"

"Understood. What do I say your name is?"

"Hikitsuga Yamato." That was the family name on Mom's birth certificate apparently, so it makes sense that it would be the legal name of his legal guardian. He never really asked, it wasn't necessary until now.

"And what should I put down for your contact information?"

"I'll send it to you. There should be a new phone waiting for you in your room, which you'll be using for this. The exams are in a month. Prepare however you see fit."

Before Izuku can ask any more questions, the portal he came in through reopens in a clear dismissal. He quickly walks through it, happy for the escape despite his remaining confusion. He collapses into his barstool the second he gets to it.

"What'd he want?" Izuku holds back his groan at Tomura's questioning, knowing Sensei is probably still listening to them.

"I'm going to UA."

"The hero school?" Tomura's tone is a good mix of disgusted and confused.

"Yup." His head remains in his arms on the counter, he doesn't bother to lift it.

"Wh-" Tomura begins to ask.

"He wants to speak with you as well, Tomura," Kurogiri interrupts, making Tomura actually groan. Izuku hears his stool scratch against the ground when he stands up, followed quickly by the near-silent sound of somebody using one of Kurogiri's portals.

How long did he sleep last night? An hour? Less? Not enough, that's for sure. He’d known that the distinct feeling of dread that kept him from sleeping over the last few days hadn’t been for nothing. His entire body feels heavy, as if an anvil were covering it or it was being swept away by a strong wave. He can't quite muster up the energy to panic about what Sensei would want him at UA for— well, he couldn't until now. What does Sensei want? Is he targeting the students? Was he targeting the other courses? But then why would he want Izuku in heroics? Maybe he's targeting the staff. But why would he even going after them? Their teachers are far from the most powerful heroes out there, and there's no way he's gonna be recruiting people already dedicating their lives to heroics. Or—

His thoughts quickly turn at another realization, one that sets off his panic to the fullest extent. What if he's not targeting them in the sense of maiming or converting? What if he's targeting their quirks?

UA, for the most part, keeps their staff private. There's no list floating around that names them all off, but most heroes are recognizable if you're as dedicated to learning about all of them as Izuku is. So, which members of their staff would Sensei want to steal the quirk of? There's Midnight, Cementoss, Present Mic, and Ectoplasm. Then there's the heroes that work with UA, but those are constantly changing and definitely aren't public information. There could also be new members of the staff that Izuku hasn't heard about, or he could be targeting one of the staff members with a better-protected identity then those four. UA definitely employs underground heroes, so he needs to do more searching on their staff and see if there's anybody important that he's missed.

So, those are the four on his list. Midnight, Cementoss, Present Mic, Ectoplasm.

The thought of Sensei having any of those quirks is terrifying. There's the possibility that they're quirks that require a lot of training to be useful enough for Sensei to justify going out of his way for them. He's never been a man of practice, he wants quick and spectacular results. That might cross Present Mic and Cementoss off the list— especially with the knowledge that Present Mic's quirk caused him severe hearing loss before he was able to take preventative measures against that. And that he had a lot of difficulty turning it off and managing the volumes. Does Sensei know those facts? Izuku'll tell him them next time they speak, just in case he's his target.

So, most likely Midnight or Ectoplasm. Or Midnight and Ectoplasm. Sensei being able to put mass amounts of people to sleep or duplicate himself is a terrifying thought that he'd rather not hold onto.

If would be easier if Sensei wasn't so keen on being confusing instead of just telling Izuku his plan. Though, he might've told—

Izuku peaks his head up very slightly, just enough to see Kurogiri's eyes through his bangs. "Did-"

"I don't know why he wants you to attend UA, Izuku. You should be eating," Kurogiri answers before Izuku even has the chance to ask. Izuku groans in response, slightly more comfortable now that Tomura is gone. Of course, Sensei is the main concern, but Tomura is still a concern nonetheless.

Kurogiri nudges Izuku's plate when he doesn't respond. Izuku glances down at it. It's some of his favorite foods. Stuff that, most days, Izuku would be eager to eat. Now it just makes his stomach churn to even think about. He doesn't really have a choice though, diet is one of the things Sensei is very strict about. With Izuku, at least. Tomura gets to eat whatever he wants as long as it isn't unreasonable because he has a strong quirk to make up for his lack of physical strength. Speaking of quirks, Izuku should probably figure out which ones he's currently carrying.

"Izuku," Kurogiri interrupts another thought tangent. His eyes shoot down towards Izuku's food when Izuku looks at him, reminding him of the original request. He quickly gets to shoving the food down so he can get back to his room and figure out which quirks he has. Each bite makes him feel sick because of the anxiety already twisting his insides.

As soon as he's finally finished the meal, he hears Kurogiri's phone vibrate, making him open the portal leading to Sensei once more. Tomura walks through, already scratching his neck.

"What'd he want?" Izuku asks, mirroring Tomura's earlier question, as soon as the portal closes. Tomura opens his mouth, then pauses. He looks at Izuku for a second before looking away. Izuku’s instantly locked into all the weak points on his body. They’re the standard spots for people, vital organs and arteries.

"I'm not suppose to tell you," he answers. Before Izuku can further grill him, he's walking through the bar's door to go to his room without another word. His food remains on the counter until Kurogiri grabs it to begin cleaning.

Izuku stares at the door for a few moments to process that. If he wasn't panicking enough before, he was now. Why wouldn't Tomura be able to tell him? It was one thing if he didn't want to— Tomura's mood swings that made him hate Izuku half the time meant he frequently refused things like that— but not being allowed to? That's... bad. Probably. Izuku isn't sure, because it hasn't happened before, but it seems bad.

He definitely needs to start planning then. First he has to do what Sensei asked and apply to UA, but after that, he has to plan. Try to minimize the damage those two will inevitably cause without it backfiring completely. Totally easy. Definitely not near-impossible.

He thanks Kurogiri for the meal and rushes to his room.

Izuku immediately checks the mirror when he walks into his room. Some of the quirks Sensei gives him affect his appearence, so he looks immediately. The way his eyes glow faintly and his pupils are suddenly star shaped confirms that he’s been given Devotion. Devotion is an emitter type quirk that essentially allows its user to make anybody they touch fall in "love" with them and become so devoted to making them happy that they'll do anything they ask. It lasts up to five minutes and its time limit and effectiveness becomes stronger the longer the user maintains physical contact. It would be an incredibly useful quirk for Sensei, if not for the fact that it doesn't work if the target thinks of the user as a bad person or untrustworthy. Even people that don't know Sensei can sense that he's far from good. He radiates authority and corruption from first glance.

After seeing no more changes, he forces himself to sit down and do what he was told. The application process for UA is long and boring, especially after he realises how many things he has to consult Sensei about because he either doesn't know the answer or isn't sure what lie he's suppose to be telling. When he gets down the quirk section, which is only halfway through the full application, he's finally able to get back up and do what he's been impatiently waiting for.

The first thing he does is walk to his bookshelf and start flipping through his notebooks until he finds the one that discusses Devotion. He opens it and finds the page that its section starts in, and then moves on to the next one.

He flips to another page in the same notebook. He finds Pyrokinesis and his few notes on it. It’s not common to be given to him, but he figures Sensei has some sort of reason.

He goes to Swap. A wound swapping quirk that allows the user to swap injuries from themselves onto others and vice versa. Izuku’s had it twice before, and both times had resulted in Sensei angrily taking them away. Back when he was allowed outside more frequently, there were a few too many instances of him stepping in the middle of conflicts on the street. Both times, he’d taken the injuries from victims and given them to himself. He hasn’t had the quirk in years.

He pulls out another book, this one with Weak Spot in it. This quirk allows him to see the weakest spot on a persons body once he makes eye contact with them. Izuku’s had it a couple of times since Sensei lost his eyesight and it became useless to him. He hates it.

He doesn’t have notes on any of the other quirks he’s been given. He pulls out his most recent notebook and starts sections for the unnamed flight quirk and Cloud. He doesn’t bother to test them yet, knowing he needs to hurry up before Sensei gets mad that he’s taking too long.

Now he has to decide which he's going to use. Which quirk can get him into UA, and which can keep him there.

Izuku's... confident in his abilities even without a borrowed quirk. He's been strictly trained for the last eight years and fought much worse than a few teenagers. He doesn't want to think about what he's defeated— he needs to plan, not mope around with old memories— but it's a lot. He decides he needs to know more about the entrance exam before making his decision, so he pulls up another tab on his laptop and gets to searching.

He doesn't even realise how much time has passed until he glances to the corner of the screen, finding it reading 1pm already. He woke up at 7am and spent just over two hours on eating, speaking to Sensei, filling out the beginning of his application, and figuring out his quirks. Which meant that he'd been looking into the entrance exam for four hours. He chastises himself despite how constantly he does things like this and moves on.

From what he'd found, they tend to cycle through five different types of exams. The first is modified games, similar to the sports festival's usual second round. The second is a fighting pro heroes, both staff and non-staff. The third is fighting inanimate beings, like robots. The fourth is rescue-based tests. The fifth is just a group of miscellaneous ones like obstacle courses. He notes that none of the standard tests are explicitly based on students fighting other students, probably to prevent serious injury from untrained, unpredictable teenagers. The recommendation exam, on the other hand, frequently allows fighting between students because they're verified to be previously trained by professionals.

He'd been taking various notes the entire time, so he looks through them once more before deciding which would be best for which. Sensory Overload and possibly Cloud, depending on how it worked, would be best for type one. Weak Spot, Devotion, and Sensory Overload would be best for type two. Pyrokinesis could be best for three if he ends up lucky, if not then he has no idea. Weak Spot, Wound Swap, and possibly Devotion would be best for type four. Type five was too unpredictable to figure out which would be best for.

By those tallies, either Sensory Overload or Devotion would be better for getting him in. For staying though... he has no idea. As good as a sensory quirk was, it wasn’t the best for more dangerous situations. He’s leaning towards Devotion, but if he's not facing other people in the exam, he could be completely screwed by his choice. There's also the possibility that something happens that instantly makes his opponents hate him and Devotion stop working, however slim those chances are. Then there was the four he either knew nothing about or had never tested.

He releases his painfully-tight grip on his hair when a new idea pops into his head. Sensei had said he could choose from any of the quirks he currently had. That... didn't necessarily mean he could only choose one, he just had to be able to pass them off as one quirk. Right? He slowly picks up his phone and texts Sensei, asking if that's allowed and staring at his phone until his reply comes through.

Sensei: Whatever you can pass as one quirk can be used. You're keeping all nine for now.

At that confirmation, he moves on to figuring how he's going to do that. It takes short period of considering, but in the end he goes for the truth.

—

Nine: An emitter type touch-activated quirk that allows the user to take the quirks of other people.

—

With that part of the application in and sent off to Sensei for legal registration, he has no choice but to pray that his quirks will be enough and move on to finishing his task.

☆☆☆

Another thing he'd found during his research was that the applications were only being accepted for another week. Why? Because the exam was in two weeks. Which left him very, very little time to prepare. Thus, nearly every waking moment was spent training by Sensei's insistence. His routine quickly became:

5am: wake up, hygiene, get dressed in clothes fit for training

5:30am: stretch & warm up

6am: breakfast

6:30am: get teleported to the warehouse used for training, begin whatever Sensei asks for the day

12pm: lunch

1pm: return to warehouse

When he got back to the bar depended on the day and its plans, varying between 5pm to 12am. If he was seriously injured by the training (which only happened twice in the two weeks, lucky him) he was allowed to go back early. His usual schoolwork hours were replaced by training, but Sensei said that he would be returning to his normal schedule after the exam. He was suppose to study for the regular exam in the time he had between getting back for the night and going to sleep, which he did most days. His incredibly rare free time was spent working on analysis, which was basically just another part of his training, but something he enjoyed when he was allowed to do it for personal reasons and not by Sensei's orders.

He rarely saw Tomura during the two weeks, which wouldn't be unusual if he was just stuffed into his room playing video games, but he wasn't. Izuku had checked a few times, and the times he was present, he was clearly in the middle of actual work. For what? Izuku didn't know. Tomura also ended up being completely gone much more than what was normal for him. Once, while Izuku was eating lunch at the bar (which he'd ended up making himself because of Kurogiri's strange absence) he'd seen the older emerging from one of Kurogiri's portals. He was dressed in the costume made for his villain persona. Tomura didn't even look at him as he made his way to his room, and Kurogiri dodged every question Izuku asked.

If Izuku's unease wasn't bad enough before that, it was after. Izuku wasn't ready for this to begin. After that incident, his analysis time and sleep was replaced by anxious planning and full-blown breakdowns.

That's how he spends the night before the entrance exam. Sick with anxiety, desperately trying to come up with solutions that won't get everything he cares about destroyed. Despite the fact that he doesn't have to be at UA until 7 in the morning, he ends up getting so little sleep that he honestly can't tell if he got any. It doesn't feel like it and he doesn't remember it happening, but there's a few hours of missing time. He settles for resting and fighting to fall back asleep until 5am, when he finally drags himself out of bed to get ready. He's suppose to be leaving at 6:30, even though he's actually rather far from UA, because Kurogiri is going to portal him there. Or, a ten minute walk from there, as a safety precaution.

He goes through his usual morning routine of showering, brushing his teeth, and trying to sort out his hair into something semi-neat. He spends half an hour doing light exercise. He'd skipped dinner the night before, pretending to be asleep when Kurogiri came to get him for them. His caretaker seemed to figure that he needed to rest and left him alone, which meant he really needed to eat, then finish getting ready, in only half an hour. He probably should've gotten up earlier. He decides to finish getting ready first, but asks Kurogiri if he can make him something to eat before that.

The first thing he does is pack his backpack, one that he only just acquired. He puts a spare notebook as well as the notebook decidicated to the on paper version of Nine in it. He grabs a couple of pens and pencils, a water bottle, and a set of workout clothes. Usually, workout clothes are just a pair of jersey shorts and a loose t-shirt, but he doesn't think it would be a great first impression to run around with his scars on display. Especially the newer ones, like the clear claw marks running down half of his leg that are still raised, dark, and uncomfortably visible. That would probably raise a few red flags. He also needs something practical for combat, which would ideally be more protective than just some thin shorts. He chooses some black leggings, green jersey shorts, a black long-sleeve exercise shirt, a white t-shirt, and some durable shoes made for running. He would just stick to the long sleeve and leggings, but the thought of that makes his skin crawl. He prefers as much cover as possible.

After that, he moves on to what he's going to wear before the practical. Most people will probably be wearing school uniforms because it was requested that they do, but he doesn't think he'll get in trouble for not complying. He isn't really sure. Nonetheless, he doesn't have a school uniform, and definitely doesn't have the energy to put on some fancy outfit that can pass as one. He has a couple of suits, because Sensei insists that he needs them, but they've almost never been worn. Everything about them makes Izuku uncomfortable, from the material to the resemblance he has to Sensei while in them. Instead, he grabs clothes he actually enjoys wearing. Today will be anxiety filled enough as is, no need to make it worse. The outfit ends up being a comfortable, knitted green sweatshirt along with a white undershirt and a pair of light, baggy jeans.

He plans on stopping at a store on the way to get some type of energy drink, so he makes sure to grab his wallet along with his phone— the phone Sensei bought for UA, he reminds himself when he almost takes his usual one instead. He also decides to grab a pair of headphones in hopes that music will somewhat help him relax. He puts his backpack on and examines himself once more in the mirror.

The outfit covers the majority of his scars, but it's hard to hide something the engulfs almost all of your body. There's still a few noticable ones on his face, neck, and hands. He does what he can to make his hair cover as much of his face as possible while still looking decent, and lets his sweatshirt sleeves fall over his hands. His hair is a whole other issue that he hadn't even thought of until now.

Naturally, his hair is completely white, much like Sensei's. He, for obvious reasons, hates that. He dyes it green whenever possible, but it's been around two months since the last time. White is a color that stands out and is unfortunately starkly different from green, so his roots are painfully noticeable. He only feels slightly thankful that his skin is dark enough that the roots don't just look like bald spots. The green is slightly faded, but it was dyed a darker shade that makes it look fresh in color unless you know its original state. His tries to ignore the nausea that rolls through him just from looking at his hair when he's already feeling poor mentally. He moves on.

His ever-present eyebags are particularly deep, he tries not to let that pointless insecurity consume him. His outfit looks... unprofessional. Like he's going to the park, or to the store. Sensei wouldn't like it. He finds himself minutely happy about that despite the situation. His backpack is an obnoxious yellow that Sensei holds a similar distaste for, which makes it perfect to Izuku. Satisfied with what he has control over, he finally leaves his room.

Downstairs is Kurogiri and a meal that Izuku forces down. He regrets asking for food before remembering that he needs it even if it feels horrible in the moment. His whole "morning" routine took an unexpectedly long time, so he ends up having to leave some of the food behind after promising Kurogiri that he'll buy something to eat along with his drink.

Kurogiri walks around the bar and runs through a quick checklist with Izuku, which he appreciates. "Pencils?"

"Yep."

"Pens?"

"Yes."

"Clothes for the practical?"

"Mhm."

"Phone?"

"Yeah, the UA one," he adds before Kurogiri can double check that fact.

"... Is that water bottle empty?"

Izuku pauses and turns his head to look at the bottle in his backpack's side pocket. "...Maybe?"

Kurogiri sighs and grabs it to fill it up for him. Izuku checks the time while he waits. 6:31am. Already a minute behind schedule. Sensei wouldn't be happy.

"You have your wallet?" Kurogiri confirms while he walks back towards him.

"Yep."

He hands the bottle back to Izuku and finally opens the portal behind him. Izuku puts it back into its pocket and makes himself take a deep breath. He needs to calm down. Kurogiri sets a hand on his shoulder. "Relax, you'll do fine."

Izuku nods despite not buying that statement for a second. He glances back at the portal before looking at Kurogiri again. "Good luck Izuku," Kurogiri says before lightly pushing him towards the portal to tell him to hurry up. Izuku nods again, words lost to his building anxiety. He forces his legs to unlock and slowly steps in.

As he predicted, his nerves are strung tighter than he thinks they've ever been. He feels like he can't breathe, like everything about this situation is swooping over him once more. Everything about his situation in general.

Despite the fact that he understands how fucked up his life is, the crushing weight of it doesn't often hit him. It's happened before, of course, but whenever he feels it coming on, he tends to do his best to shut it all down and try not to acknowledge it. He knows who his grandfather is, he knows what his grandfather wants from him, he knows that what's happened to him is wrong, he knows that what he's done is horrible. He just... doesn't like to think about it. But at times like this, he can't stop it. He wants nothing more than to sink into the floor and let it consume him just so he can be out.

He looks around himself, forces his brain to work well enough to recognize which direction UA is in, and starts walking.

The theories and questions that raced through his mind that entire morning are now replaced with an endless tirade of Why? Why me? He'd like to tell himself that he's glad it's him in this situation and not someone else, but he doesn't know how true that is anymore. He's so sick of it. He just wants to be out. He wants to be safe, and cared for, and out .

He sees a convince store a few feet ahead of him and turns in to it. He makes his way to the fridges lining the walls after scanning the room. He mindlessly grabs two highly caffeinated drinks he knows he doesn't hate as well as a protein bar and makes his way to the register.

Izuku's chews the inside of his lip as he sets his items down and waits for the guy to ring them up.

He grabs the money from his wallet, waits awkwardly for the change while he shoves his items into his backpack, he leaves out one of the drinks and starts drinking it as soon as he exits the store. It's one of the brands that's been banned by Sensei for its All Might affiliations. Affiliation is putting it lightly, to be fair, because All Might's face and catch lines are plastered all around it. It's even named "Energy Smash".

It only takes a few more minutes to arrive at UA, making him nearly ten minutes early. Sensei would consider that late. He grips his Smash drink tightly as he makes his way through the entrance. UA's campus is massive, but he already knew that. The amount of time he's spent just looking at maps and photos of UA would be embarrassing to admit to. Actually being there makes him forget everything else for a moment, just so he can take it in.

Like most kids he knew, he used to desperately want to attend this school. It was one of his main goals in life, along with just being a hero in general. Sorrow hits him after a moment of basking in his surroundings, he pushes it away and keeps moving. Or, he tries to keep moving. It seems the world has other plans, if the way that he almost immediately begins an unexpected descent is any indication.

He manages to catch himself before hitting the ground, but fails to handle the multitasking skills that not dying and keeping his hold on a drink at the same time requires. The mostly empty can is suddenly on the floor in front of him, it's contents spilling onto the pavement. He gives himself a moment to be dramatic and think about how this is probably the perfect symbolism.

"Are you okay?" An overly energetic voice asks from his side. He barely manages not to jump out of his skin and quickly turns to its source.

Said source is bending over, picking up the Smash drink. "I can throw this away for you, if you want?" she offers once she's standing straight again.

"Uhh..." The girl in front of him has short-ish brown hair, two pieces in the front are longer than the rest. She's wearing a pink scarf and a nice looking coat on top of what seems to be a school uniform. She's smiling. Izuku realises that he's just staring at her, and should probably say something. "That's, uhm, alright. I can do it." Good enough.

"Okay!" How is she so happy looking? How is she not dying from the stress of what they're about to do? "Good luck with the exam!" She hands the can back to him before hurrying towards the building.

He gives his mind a moment to stop buffering before he follows. He doesn't realise that he completely forgot to thank her until she's already too far ahead of him for him to get her attention, but he inwardly reminds himself to do so if he sees her again.

The inside of the school feels even more impressive, but the way that it's significantly more crowded takes away from that fact. He searches for somewhere to recycle the can while he walks, keeping vigilant to make sure he doesn't bump into anybody. It's only now that he realises he might need to practice socializing even more than he needs to train and study. All around him, people are talking and laughing. Even people wearing completely different school uniforms, implying that at least some of them don't know each other already. The only person anywhere near his age that he talks to is Tomura, and he's technically an adult and basically his family. If his interaction with the girl outside was anything to go off of, he's probably miles behind other people his age in that subject. The thought of having to practice talking to people is humiliating, so he pushes it from his head.

He finally sees a recycling bin, which he throws the can into. A little ways away from the front entrance is the end of what seems to be a long line of examinees, so he heads towards it. It takes a few minutes to get to the front, where he's handed a basic card with his name, 'battle center group', and examinee number— which doubles as his seat number. Then he's directed to follow the group of students heading in the direction of what he guesses is the exam room.

The room they lead him to is a large, uncomfortably dimmed, extremely crowded auditorium. He has to wander for a minute before finding his seat, which is in very back and at the end of the row, making it only a foot away from the door. He would considering himself incredibly lucky, if not for the fact that he'd specifically asked to be as close as possible to an exit in the 'necessary accommodations' section of his application. He's still surprised that that was accepted though, considering he'd left out any reasons because he couldn't think of a good enough one. He notes that most of the other students in the back are way taller than him, which he hadn't even considered. He suddenly feels extremely selfish for possibly taking the seat from someone who actually needs it. He also feels extremely... small. Insignificant. It's not an unwelcome feeling by any means, and it's somehow completely different from the feeling he gets when he recognizes the size difference between himself and Sensei, or even himself and Tomura.

The boy to his left is one of the shorter but still comparatively massive ones. His brown hair is short and spikey, and his open backpack is full of what looks like far too many sweets. Izuku automatically begins thinking of the possible quirk indications before trying to force himself to stop. He shouldn't be sizing up this boy, he's not an opponent. Not yet, at least.

Because he still has a bit of time before the exam begins, he puts his headphones in and clicks shuffle on the first playlist he sees, then starts examining the room. The first things to catch his eyes are the heroes. There aren't many, most of the school's staff are probably elsewhere for security reasons, but there are still quite a few. He sees Present Mic next to the stage, talking to Ectoplasm. Or one of Ectoplasm's clones, because there's actually a few of him around the room. Both of Sensei's most obvious targets in one spot, that would be horrible if he knew. He also sees Power Loader near one of the exits, Izuku had only seen him mentioned as one of UA's staff members in a couple of places. The last hero he sees is Vlad King, who is mentioned even more rarely than the former.

It hits him where he is fully now, he drowns out the building panic by turning up his music until it hurts his ears and fully ignoring the side-eye Spikey rewards him with. He grabs out his second energy drink, this one a basic canned coffee that has too much caffeine to be healthy. He downs nearly half of it in one drink. When he looks around himself again, he immediately makes eye contact with somebody and feels his entire body tense on instinct.

He doesn't recognize them immediately, but they're definitely a hero. He doesn't have the chance to look them over for answers, because he's already been caught in a staring match.

Usually, strangers look away the second they're caught staring. This man apparently never learned manners, because he continues on with an entirely unapologetic face, void of any expression. Izuku would just look away, but his interactions with Sensei have taught him that staring matches can be incredibly important in certain situations. They've won and lost Izuku plenty, so he knows better. Of course, they moved on to other types of contests after Sensei's injury, but the two years before that were plenty of time to learn. If he can win against Sensei of all people, he can win here too.

Each second that ticks by fills Izuku with more panic. Is this guy just trying to scare him? Is there a reason behind his staring? Did he say something that Izuku missed because of his music? Why isn't he saying anything now, then? Does he also have no idea what's going on?

Then, the guy looks away. Izuku feels his body unwind immediately, and then he starts to feel ridiculous for how worked up he got by that. When he glances at the guy again, he sees him using eye drops. "Cheater," Izuku mutters, mostly on accident. He looks away before he can see the reaction of the guy and ignores how hot his face gets when he realises the accusation wasn't as silent as he had planned.

That's one hero he doesn't know the identity of that's most likely staff, meaning another possible target. He glances at him again, taking in his outfit. Black jumpsuit, utility belt, some kind of scarf— most likely a capture weapon— and... something yellow that is mostly tucked into said capture weapon. The guy's hair is rather long and he clearly hasn't shaved in a few days at least, whether that's intentional or not. Izuku focuses on the yellow, it tugging at his memory the most. The guy lifts one arm to scratch the back of his neck, making the item slightly more visible. Izuku freezes all over again.

Eraserhead. Erasure. One of Sensei's longest running targets. Fuck.

Eraserhead looks at Izuku again, sensing his staring. Izuku looks away immediately and tries to control his breathing. Of course, Sensei can't exactly use Erasure anymore. But that wouldn't stop him from giving it to Tomura, or Izuku, or somebody else he could force to do whatever he needs. Erasure is also one of the few quirks that could effectively outmatch Sensei, hence the man's fixation on it. Maybe he doesn't know Eraserhead is here— no, that's ridiculous. Sensei would know. He's targeted the man and his quirk before, it makes sense that he would do it again. Izuku tries to silence the chorus of curses going through his mind. He sees Present Mic walking towards the center of the stage and takes out one of his earbuds, not willing to be left without any music until neccessary.

He can't let Sensei get Erasure, he knows that much. What's he going to do to stop it, though? When he gets back to the bar, Sensei is going to want to speak to him. He's going to ask for every single detail of Izuku's day, and Izuku will have no choice but to be honest. You don't go two hundred years without picking up a quirk that prevents people from lying to you. Izuku learned that the hard way. So, Sensei will ask, and Izuku will tell. The thought of telling Eraserhead crosses his mind. He's a foot away from Izuku. There's nothing stopping him other than fear. He could do it.

He doesn't. He knows he won't, knows he's too selfish for that. He tries to convince himself, but he stays silent.

"Heeelllooo Listeners!" Izuku cringes against his own will. He slouches in his chair like that will make Present Mic's voice any quieter. "I know you're all excited for the practical exam, but we gotta get this quiz outta the way first!" Present Mic is fascinating to Izuku. If it wasn't for the panic consuming him, he'd be completely star struck. The man's radio show was one of Izuku's few comforts in life and one of the few hero-related things that Sensei had yet to outright ban. He would listen to it constantly to get through training, schooling, Tomura, and boredom.

"Bots are gonna be goin' down each isle, take one of each packet. Don't start until I say—" Izuku takes each packet from the small robot passing him. "—go! Anybody caught cheating will be disqualified, so either get smart or get sneaky! Mute those phones and keep them in your bag! When you're all done, go ahead and bring those tests down here! If you have any questions, ask any of our awesome staff throughout the room!"

Izuku takes out his phone to double check that it's silenced and then puts it, along with his headphones, into his bag. He grabs out a pencil and stares at the two packets in front of him. The first is the questions, the second is where you put the answers. The answer packet's first two pages are just bubbles with the question's number next to them, the rest are places for non multiple choice questions except for the last three, which are blank.

Izuku sees a student from the row in front of him get up and start walking towards Eraserhead. They have blond hair with what looks a bit like a black lightning bolt on the side, it reminds him of the hero Spark-Plug. He tries to look like he isn't listening.

"Do you have pencils we can use here? I kinda forgot to g-" the boy begins.

"No. Come prepared next time," Eraserhead responds simply. Izuku stops pretending he's not listening and fully looks at them, resisting the urge to glare at Eraserhead. How does that make any sense? They obviously have spare pencils, they're in a school. Even if it's some lesson about proper preparation, it's a shitty one. He can see the panic on the boy's face immediately.

"I have one you can borrow," Izuku interrupts, tensing when they turn to him. To avoid unnecessary interaction, he just holds out his pencil instead of waiting for a response. The boy's body instantly sags in relief, he smiles at Izuku.

"Thanks man, I owe you one," he says simply, accepting the pencil and making his way back to his seat. Izuku grabs another one from his bag.

"Do you have any more?" Somebody across from him asks. Izuku looks over and sees a girl clearly looking straight at him. Instead of immediately responding, he checks his bag just in case. He has two more still, so he gets up and walks past Eraserhead to hand her one. He accidentally walks to close to him, which he knows is disrespectful. She thanks him while he walks back to his seat. He grabs out both spare pencils incase somebody else asks. Somebody does, this time somebody a few seats away from him in his own row. He hands his last spare over to her and prays nobody else asks. He sees a few other students handing out spare pencils around the room.

"Remember! If you don't finish your test today, you can come on back tomorrow and finish up with our gen ed appliers, or stay after the practical! You got three hours now, then we're movin' on!" Present Mic adds while they wait.

While the bots finish passing out the tests, Izuku reads over what questions he can see and starts figuring out their answers. They're about what he expected difficulty-wise. He'd taken the mock exams plenty of times over the last two weeks, and this was only slightly harder than those. He knows the answers immediately and starts to relax, hoping that they remain near this level throughout the test. He notices a timer on the screen behind Present Mic, set to three hours and not yet started. He takes a deep breath and another drink of his coffee.

"Allllright! Everybody ready? Doesn't matter! Go!"

Izuku reviews the test and his answers around a thousand times, but he still can't force himself to get up and hand it over. He's pretty sure that he did the best he could, and that if he fails it'll only be the fault of his smarts, not his rush. The issue is that "pretty sure" isn't good enough. Passing isn't good enough. Doing well isn't good enough. Sensei is a perfectionist, and that extends to Izuku and Tomura completely. Izuku knows that the worst he can do is the best anyone else can hope for. He needs to get top scores on either the written or the practical, and he can't just hold out hope that he can do better than hundreds of other contestants. He has to do everything he physically can here.

He doesn't want to say the exam is easy, because that sounds overconfident and overconfidence is what gets you killed. There were certainly a few questions that took him quite a while, especially in the last section, but overall... the lack of challenge sets him on edge. Even most of the optional questions felt obvious to him. He's pretty sure he must have missed something and completely bombed. Anxiety keeps him rooted to his seat, despite the fact that there's still over an hour left in the exam and a good number of people have already turned theirs in.

So, instead of getting up, he continues reviewing over and over for the remaining amount of time. He only changes one bubble answer and ends up wording three of his written answers better, though not changing the main idea of any of them. He feels faint just from the stress of this and the thought of how Sensei will respond when— if he fails.

"Alllright! Time's up Listeners!" Izuku thinks he's going to puke. He threads his fingers through his hair and reminds himself to breathe. "Our staff's gonna be heading on through now to collect the remaining packets, and some bots will be comin' to give you hand-outs! Please stay seated while they do!"

Jesus, he shouldn't have had that caffeine. He feels like he's vibrating, his legs won't stop bouncing and he's sure this is the most his hands have ever shook over something this mundane.

Get it together he tells himself. If this is too much, how fucked up are you for being okay with everything else? Does it only matter if you're the one in danger?

Izuku thanks his spatial awareness for letting him notice a man, Eraserhead, walking up to him. Izuku holds out his test papers before he can ask, already having untangled his hands from his hair. He looks up, meeting Eraserhead's eyes for a moment and trying to silently convey how sorry he is for what he's causing.

"Is this complete?" Eraserhead's voice is monotone almost to the same degree as Kurogiri's, which is hard to achieve considering the latters inability to feel emotion.

"Yes, sir," Izuku replies, silently cursing himself for the slight waver in his tone. He continues looking at him and sees the man glance over Izuku, which makes him straighten his posture and clasp together his hands on instinct alone.

"You're suppose to be wearing your school uniform."

"I'm homeschooled." Izuku's reply is too quick, making it seem like he's trying to start a confrontation. He had the response prepared because he was worried about somebody pointing exactly that out. Clearly he should've spent more time figuring out how to say it. "Sir," he adds hesitantly, hoping that will save the situation. He cringes slightly, thankful when Eraserhead moves on without further comment. A bot comes by a moment later and Izuku grabs one of the papers it's holding and starts studying it. Izuku barely gets to begin reading it before he's interrupted, but his eyes still catch on the images.

Robots. Fucking robots. Of all the options they had, they had to go with that one. Izuku resists the slight urge to just burst into tears and accept his fate.

"If we missed your test, come on up with it!" He pauses for a moment, but begins again before Izuku can continue studying the paper. "Now, time for what you've all been waiting for! My uninturrpted air time, everybody say 'HEEEEY!'" The silence following the hero's request makes Izuku grimace, the few stray awkward coughs only making it a thousand times worse. He briefly considers doing it but very quickly decides there's no way in hell that that's happening. "I've got shivers down my spine too, listeners! All right! I'm gonna give you the low-down on how this'll go down! Are you ready? YEAAHH!" Yet again, nobody responds. Izuku sinks down in his seat, hoping to escape the second hand embarrassment that Present Mic doesn't seem to hold an ounce of.

"Now pay close attention listeners! We'll be testing your mettle by running a ten-minute practice run at our replica city district! OK! Time for the presentation!" The screen behind Present Mic changes to show an overhead view of one of the fake cities, surrounded by small characters that Izuku recognized from an old video game he'd made fun of Tomura for playing. They each had an amount of points on them, from 1 to 3. Izuku looks down at his hand-out, seeing four different robot models labelled A-D. He assumes the video game characters were meant to represent them, but one was missing.

"We're throwin' a large number of faux villains into each of these sites! They'll appear in three different varieties, with point values scaled according to difficulty!" It changes to another animation of the video game characters moving around. "You'll all use your quirks to disable the faux villains and earn points. That's your goal, listeners! Of course, playing the anti-hero and attacking other examinees is prohibited!" Izuku wonders how many times that had happened before it had to become a spoken rule instead of just a written one. He wonders if anyone will break it regardless, and suddenly the size difference between him and those around him feels a lot more uncomfortable.

"May I ask a question?!" Somebody shouts, Izuku spots them immediately from the way their hand shoots up as they stand from their seat.

"Examinee 7111! Go for it!" An unnecessary spotlight shines on the boy, and Izuku grimaces as he imagines himself in their position.

"There appear to be no fewer than four varieties of faux villains on this handout! Such an obvious error, if it is one, is truly unbecoming for U.A., Japan's top academy! We are all here today to be molded into model heroes!" Izuku has to bite his tounge to keep from telling him it probably isn't the best idea to shit-talk U.A. to one of their employees. He holds in an eye roll and leans back, reading the pamphlet.

“Alright alright, examinee 7111, nice catch! Thanks! But the fourth faux villain variety gets you zero points! He’s more of an obstacle! Have you played Super Mario Brothers?” Izuku perks up slightly at the mention while most of the students whisper to each other in confusion. It’s a two hundred year old game, to be fair. Tomura is just a weirdo.

“It’s kinda like a thwomp! Only one at each site! A ‘gimmick’ that’ll rampage around in close quarters!”

“Got it. So it’s like a gimmick to be avoided. Thank you, sir. I apologize for the interruption!” The blue haired boy says, bowing before sitting back down.

Present Mic simply shoots finger guns at him before speaking. “That’s all from me! I’ll leave you listeners with our school motto! The great hero Napoleon Bonaparte once said ‘true heroism consists in being superior to the ills of all life.’ PLUS ULTRA! Break a leg everyone!”

He walks off the stage, quickly replaced by Ectoplasm telling them they have forty-five minutes to relax and then get ready for the practical. Izuku pops his headphones back in as soon as he’s finished and starts exiting the room along with everybody else.

He beelines to the bathrooms across from the exam room. He spends a good minute splashing his face with water and washing his hands over and over, hoping to ease his anxiety the slightest bit. It helps a little. He fixes his hair, which was significantly more messy than it had been when he left— probably from how often he'd tugged on it during the exam. He starts to turn around to leave, but is interrupted by somebody practically running into the restroom. They're holding a hand over their mouth. Before Izuku can even process his surroundings, they're vomitting into the trash can a few feet away from him.

Izuku stares, dumbfounded, for a moment before his brain catches up. "Are you alright?" Okay, dumb question. They were puking into a trashcan, obviously they weren't alright.

The person takes a few deep breaths before replying. "Fine, thank you. Just the nerves." Izuku notes their accent but has trouble placing it.

They step away from the trashcan and to the sink. "I'm sure you'll do fine," Izuku tries to assure. He rocks on his feet, remembering that he needs to practice socializing. "Did you finish the written exam?"

They nod. "I rushed through the last part, so my chances aren't looking too good."

Izuku shrugs, "As long as you pass, you can get into the hero course."

They run the water over their hands, then splash their face. "Yeah, that's true."

"You want some water?" Izuku offers after an awkward moment. He grabs his bottle and holds it out. They stare for a moment before nodding and taking it. Their hair is a pale blond and long in comparison to most guys. They have purple eyes.

"Merci," the boy says when he hands Izuku's bottle back to him. So, French, probably. The accent makes sense now.

"I have a protein bar, if you want that. I'm probably not gonna eat it, and you shouldn't do the practical on an empty stomach..."

He takes a moment to answer, but eventually says, "If you really don't mind, then I'd appreciate it."

Izuku crouches, setting his backpack in front of him to search through it for the bar. "I'm Aoyama Yuuga," the boy says while he searches. Izuku looks up.

"Midoriya Izuku." He hands over the bar, which Aoyama thanks him for.

"I need to go pick up a support item, but thank you. And I'm sorry you had to see that," Aoyama says as they start to walk out of the restroom.

"Don't worry about it," Izuku replies, shrugging. "I hope you feel better soon." They part ways, Aoyama heading to the support room and Izuku heading to follow where the most people are going. He prays they’re leading him to the changing room.

He has to start planning how he’s going to pass this. Robots. Which quirks will be best for that?

He’s been experimenting, mostly figuring out Cloud and the flight quirk and trying fruitlessly to find out what the other two quirks are. He’s found out that Cloud is able to create clouds of any density, from strong enough to walk on to thin enough that it’s barely a mist. The flight quirk is simply levitation. They work well in combination.

Cloud could be useful, the moisture could mess with the electronics inside the robots. Pyrokinesis could work if there was any fire, or if he could make one somehow. Sensory Overload would be help track down the bots. The rest wouldn’t be helpful.

He shakes his hands, trying to ease his anxiety. The group does, in fact, lead him to the changing room. He heads straight to the stalls to change.

He lets himself space out and think while he changes and makes his way to his battle zone, which he finds only by miracle. He’s one of the first people there, so he leans against the wall and considers.

How big will the robots be? How much of an obstacle is the zero pointer? What the hell does he do if Cloud doesn’t work, if the electronics are protected too well for it to get into? The battle center’s entrance is open to them, so he spends some time examining it. He’s worked himself into a mess by the time they’re all there, ready to go. When he looks up and around, he sees her. The nice girl from earlier. Deciding it’s better to get it over with, he starts walking to her.

His trip is cut short by a boy grabbing his shoulder. Izuku flinches hard before freezing, then slowly looks up at the boy. He finds the annoying kid that interrupted Present Mic, 7111. “Yes?” he asks, softening his gaze and tilting his head. He knows how to deal with this. Tomura had this phase a few years back. He calms his breathing as he glances at the hand still grabbing him.

“That girl seems to be doing some kind of meditation. Why are you here? Hoping to interfere?” Izuku blinks, looking at 7111 and then at the nice girl. He has a point, in his defense.

“Oh! I was just going to thank her for helping me earlier. I guess I should give her space. Sorry.” He slowly puts his hand on top of the boys, grabbing it lightly and pulling it off of his shoulder. He pauses, trying for a smile, before holding out his hand. “I’m Midoriya Izuku, nice to meet you.”

7111 seems confused at that before slowly grabbing his hand, shaking it hesitantly. “Iida Tenya, likewise. And it’s quite alright, you clearly had good intentions.” 7111, Iida, clears his throat.

Izuku cuts his performance short, right before he was about to start praising the boys obvious quirk and studious attitude. He’s glad he doesn’t have to. He smiles again, and then looks forward. They have five minutes. He spends it stretching, watching as half the people there do the same. The other half stand around awkwardly or goof off. It’s not a great look. Iida stands near him the whole time, looking over at him every few moments.

He hears someone clear their throat over a loudspeaker. That’s the only warning he gets before Present Mic is saying, “And… begin!”

Izuku hesitates for a moment, along with every other applicant there. Then he starts running, along with about five other people. “What wrong? The test’s started! Run! Run! The die is cast!” Present Mic urges over the speaker, Izuku doesn’t look back to see how long the other applicants took to start. He’s busy caught in combat with a one pointer.

“Target locked! Prepare for termanation!” It says, making Izuku huff. Then a laser shoots at him, and he gets to moving. In his anxiety, he completely blanks on the fact that he has quirks at his disposal. Instead of using them, he finds himself jumping on to its back and simply prying its head off. It’s surprisingly easy, but it’s also only one point.

As soon as he’s off, he chastises himself and goes over his list of quirks. He takes a moment to zone in with Sensory Overload to locate his next target, which is in the alleyway a bit ahead of him. It’s a three pointer. He uses Cloud, forming a dense cloud and sending it in before spreading it throughout the entire bot. It dies immediately, and he thanks every entity he can think of. Then he’s off, chasing every sound he hears.

He runs in to a lot of applicants in clear need of help. Every time, he tells himself he can’t waste time and that he needs to earn points to get in. Every time, he finds himself helping them anyway. He lifts some rubble off of a boy, helping him onto his feet and pointing him in the direction of a one pointer after making sure he’s not injured. He steps in when he finds another boy cowering at a three pointer, taking it out and wishing the boy luck. He pulls a girl out of the way of a flying piece of metal. He tears off a piece of his long sleeve to wrap around a boy’s bleeding ankle after he got hit by a piece of bot.

Along the way, he takes out mainly three pointers. He’s at fifty points soon enough, and he’s going better than most based on the numbers he hears people shouting. He sees the nice girl again along with Iida, both taking out robots. Izuku has to pull a girl out of the way when nice girl lets her bots drop and sends a piece of one flying.

“Careful. Someone could get hit,” he tells nice girl, breathing heavily from all the running. She’s also sweating and breathing hard. Her face gets impossibly red.

“Sorry! I’ll be more careful!” Izuku just nods at her before turning around to take care of an approaching two pointer. The number of bots is diminishing, and Izuku’s panicking. Surely those doing the best aren’t saying their numbers out loud, too focused on getting points. If that’s the case, he could easily be screwed. He looks around, eyes pausing on nice girl pulling someone out of the way of a falling piece of a building and stopping to check on them.

He looks away, eyes locking on a one pointer that he immediately sends a cloud at. His attention gets drawn to taking out robots for a good minute. Then it happens.

Part of the wall down the fake street opens. Out of it comes a robot twice the size of the buildings around them. Izuku stares.

The giant thing grabs onto one of the buildings, leaning around it like a horror movie villain. Everything crumbles under its weight. It’s fast.

He quickly turns, taking the lead of those around him and running. He needs to get some points in, not waste time with something that’ll do him no good.

He hears a cry. He turns around and sees the nice girl, lying underneath what looks like a piece of a building. She’s frantically trying to reach out and grab the rock. He’s turning back around before he even thinks.

The zero pointer is getting close, he slides on his knees the last two feet to her, ignoring the harsh sting. “I’ve got it, don’t worry,” he assures quickly, making her lean back and stop struggling to grab the rubble.

Does he have it through? What’s he suppose to do here? He figures it’s probably best to stick with what he’s been using this whole time and starts forming a cloud underneath the piece pinning her down. He makes it grow, keeping it as dense as he can. It takes a second, but pretty soon it’s big enough that he can pull her out carefully. He lets the cloud go once she’s clear.

The robot is only a few feet away. He quickly picks her up, not wasting time feeling awkward about it, and uses the flying quirk. He summons clouds under his feet to propel them forwards.

“Time’s up!” Present Mic says loudly. Izuku sighs, looking back to make sure the zero pointer has stopped moving. Once confirmed, he slowly lowers himself and her.

“You okay?” he asks.

“My, uh, ankle hurts. Bad,” she answered as he set her down to sit on the ground. He nods simply, and does the first thing he can think of. He touches her leg, and transfers the injury.

The pain is instant, it feels broken. He focuses Sensory Overload onto his sight to lessen the pain. “All good?” he asks.

She seems confused, but nods anyway. “What… what’s your quirk?”

“It’s, uh, hard to explain,” he says instead of answering.

“Well done! Good work!” he hears, and turns towards the source. It’s Recovery Girl. “Yes, yes. Candy for all, eat up.”

He hears a familiar voice explaining who she is and looks around, finding Aoyama. He smiles at him, getting a smile and a wink in return. He certainly seems different than he did during the incident earlier.

“Are you two alright?” she asks, walking to them.

“I’m okay! He, uh, healed me?” Nice girl replies, voice confused.

“My ankle and knees are messed up,” he says before anyone can question. He holds out his hand, waiting for her to kiss it. She does, then moves on after dropping a gummy into his hand. Izuku sighs in relief when the pain in his ankle disappears.

☆ ☆ ☆

He spends the next week terrified, trying to relax and finding it impossible. It continues on like the weeks of training, with Tomura disappearing constantly and him sitting in his room and panicking all times of the day.

Then it comes. He’s sitting at the bar, eating silently while Kurogiri cleans. The man stops suddenly, a portal appearing next to him. Out of it drops an envelope. He looks at it first before humming and handing it to Izuku.

Izuku takes the, surprisingly heavy, envelope and looks it over. It’s from UA. Fuck.

He can’t breathe. Everything feels like it’s sinking, like he’s being hit by that stupid wave all over again. He didn’t get in. He didn’t. Sensei’s going to kill him. He’s going to kill them . He shouldn’t have helped those people. They would have been fine. Thanks to his stupid, reckless decisions, they’re all screwed. God, how could he?

He frantically looks around, checking to see if Sensei is there yet. He’s not, but everything is moving faster than it should be and his chest feels like someone’s sitting on it. Is this one of the quirks Sensei refused to tell him about? It doesn’t matter.

He can picture perfectly what comes next. Everything he cares for, gone. Ended in front of him. Sensei is cruel enough for it. Sensei is smart enough to get away with it. To keep Izuku loyal as a dog despite it. He needs to get up, to go to his room and plan. Figure out how he’s going to stop the inevitable.

There’s a sharp, grounding pain in his knees that gives him the awareness required to look around. To actually see what’s in front of him. It’s Kurogiri. His caretaker is on one knee in front of him, hands settled on his shoulders. Izuku can’t tell if he’s saying anything. He can distantly feel him rubbing his shoulders comfortingly.

Right, this is familiar. He’s just having anxiety. No big deal. He’s fine. He knows how to deal with this.

Dealing with it means pulling his knees to his chest, because apparently he’s on the ground now, and shoving his head between them. He breaths slowly, going over what Kurogiri taught him when he started having these episodes.

It takes him a bit, but he’s eventually able to calm enough that it doesn’t sound like there’s water rushing in his ears. He can hear Kurogiri going over all the steps he’d taught him already. He can feel him holding his shoulders firmly but not too tightly. He can smell the laundry detergent on his pants.

“I’m fine,” he says once his vocal cords decide to work. “Thanks.”

“Of course, Izuku. How do you want to read the results?” Right, that. The nightmare that started this.

“Just open it,” he says, setting his chin on top of his knees. Kurogiri pauses, then sits down fully on the ground. It’s a funny image, him in his full suit sitting criss crossed on their floor.

Kurogiri slowly starts opening the envelope. Izuku feels his heart beating rapidly. Before he can overthink it, he’s reaching out and gripping the end of Kurogiri’s vest tightly. The man lets him, of course.

He finishes opening it, then reaches inside. He pulls out a circular device that Izuku narrows his eyes at. Before he can question it, a large image comes out of the top of it. All Might is standing in front of him, smile blinding.

“I am here! As a projection!” the man yells. Izuku grips Kurogiri tighter. Did UA hire All Might to do their announcements? The man has been limiting his hero time, but to be desperate enough to take a job like that? He used to do PSAs, maybe he was just thinking of it like that. All Might has been in the area for a while now though, so maybe it was just convenient.

“You may be wondering why I am here! To put it simply, I’m beginning to teach at UA high this coming school year!”

Fuck.

This is what Sensei was after. He’s trying to finish the job. Or get Tomura to do it for him.

Izuku doesn’t know how to fix this.

“Now, Midoriya Izuku! It’s time for your results!”

He begs, for the first time since Sensei told him he was applying, that he didn’t get in. He can’t do this. He’d rather face whatever Sensei throws at him than be responsible for the collapse of the symbol of peace.

“Let’s start with your written exam… you passed with flying colors! When compared to every student accepted into the hero course, you surpassed them all, with a final score of 98.5%! Outstanding job, young man!”

What was he going to do? He can’t get All Might killed. He couldn’t help that happen. All Might single-handedly held together Japan. Without him, where would they be?

Without him, Sensei would be free to do whatever he pleased.

“However, passing the written exam alone is not enough to be accepted in to the hero course.” Izuku’s heart drops. He doesn’t know how to feel. He just wishes All Might would stop playing games and tell him if he’s accepted or not.

“You scored a total of 61 villain points. Not the highest amount this time around. That alone would make you tied for fifth place!”

Fifth. He got in. Sensei would be so disappointed in his placement.

“But! That’s not the end of the story! You see, we weren’t just watching for villain-based points! A hero course that rejects those who do the right thing is no hero course at all! Rescue points were also a factor! They are another fundamental way for UA to evaluate you!” The screen started flashing, showing all the people Izuku had stopped to help out. He couldn’t help but grimace, imagining Sensei’s reaction when he saw this.

“45 rescue points have been awarded to you! Bringing your total to 106 points! You placed number one on both your written and practical! Midoriya Izuku, you have been accepted into UA high school! This will be your hero academy!”

Fuck.

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