Chapter Text
Harl had heard that the last night there was some whole city wide panic, though he was to busy at the time helping Feldmen with getting Bellamy's stuff out of her house to notice, he didn't think they were to good together anyway the relationship seeming to bring out the worst in both of them, hopefully they both find someone better for themselves then the other was, wait what was he thinking about before?
oh yeah the city wide panic, he considered asking what happened but decided against it going about the day wondering if he'd ever know.
or well wondering until Mark showed up, which was strange since Mark hates the junkyard, finds it too dirty, and thinks the junk is stacked too precariously, and that the racetrack in the junkyard is unsafe, and that Jowls is too slobbery, you know to him.
"I need you to vampire proof my house." Mark said materoffactly.
Of all the things Harl expected Mark to ask for that was not any of them.
"Why?"
"Billy saw a vampire last night, vampires aren't safe, you know they're very dangerous." Mark didn't add his usual to me.
But Billy sees a vampire everyday, Harl thought to say but with Mark's expression it was clear that would do the opposite of helping.
"I thought vampires can't get into your house unless you invite them in?"
Harl knew this wasn't true of course he had been in peoples houses uninvited many times, but once again something he decided against mentioning especially when his goal was to calm the guy.
"One of us could invite a vampire in not knowing they're a vampire."
Well Harl couldn't argue with that.
"What do you want me to do?"
"Put up crucifix or replace the door-handle with a silver one so a vampire couldn't open it."
"Well what if a vampire wore gloves" Harl wanted to say but said, "alright I'll head over and replace your door-handles." Instead.
And so Harl headed over, replacing the door-handles, he decided not to question Mark since he can get pretty worried over various nothings and Harl finds just going along with it tends to help the most.
While Harl was replacing all the door-handles; careful not to accidentally touch them with his bare skin, Ann came in.
"Oh good Mark was able to go get you, he really hates the junkyard so I wasn't sure."
"I did think it was strange he was there, so Billy saw a vampire huh?"
"He did, scared the living hell out of him, and Mark after he told us about it."
"Wonder what it really was."
"What do you mean?"
"Well Billy's a bit imaginative he probably saw something else and mistook it for a vampire."
"No it was definitely a vampire, there was whole mobs chasing after the vampire, didn't you know?"
"Oh was that what that big commotion was last night?"
"It was, some people said they saw it biting someone."
But Harl knew there was no vampire last night, he's the only vampire in this city, which is a surprisingly small amount of vampires for a city of this size.
"Oh well that's awful?"
"Glad no one here was the one to be bitten."
"the door-handles are all replaced so I should be heading out, city's not gonna help itself!" Harl said as he left.
While Harl awaited more people to help he puzzled over this vampire thing, was there possibly a new vampire and he somehow didn't know?
No that's not possible, maybe that "biting" was something else and a misunderstanding, or maybe there was context to the bite that people didn't have, or-
"Hello I vas told you can help vith things?" Asked someone Harl didn't recognize, pulling the helpful handyman from his thoughts.
"Yep, I'm Helpful Handyman Harl Hubbs, how can I help?"
"The people here think I am a vampire but I'm not and I vant them to stop being scared of me."
Ah so he's the "vampire" from last night, Harl could get why people would think he was a vampire if they were going on stereotypes alone.
"Well I think the easiest way to do that would be to prove them wrong!"
"How?"
"Simple do thinks vampires can't do, like eat garlic."
"I can't eat garlic I'm highly allergic to it."
"You could touch some silver then, though now that I think of it the fact you're out in the day should hopefully be proof enough for most people."
"I vill try these things, thank you!"
And with that Harl thought the whole vampire stuff would blow over as quick as it started.
A foolish thought really, as just minutes after the city's largest blood bank told citizens about how blood had been disappearing, they were kind enough to mention it being expired blood which couldn't be used to help anyone, but this only made the city panic more, having Harl put more vampire proofing, some actual ways to keep a vampire out and some not.
What Harl didn't know however was that this was only the start of his problems.