Work Text:
One
Bob decides to get a new book from the library. The watchtower has its own personal library and he's a regular visitor. Unlike others, he has time to read books to pass his time which seems to be abundant.
He expected an empty room as usual but finds John browsing through the rows of books.
"John?" Bob blinks in surprise. Out of all the members, John is the last person he expected to see here (even Alexei visits here time to time, mostly for English dictionary to increase his vocabulary or classic Russian books on war).
"Oh, hey Bob." The blond smiles brightly as he notices the younger man. "Didn't expect you to see here."
He was supposed to say that to John! Like, since when that blond jock is interested in books?
Was he judging a book by a cover too much?
"I'm here to get a book." Bob says looking at the other guy.
John nods then goes back to browsing. Bob feels a bit curious and finds John looking over astronomy books.
Ah...of course. The space threat.
Bob gets a ladder and climbs up. The book he needs is on the higher shelf. A philosophy book, heavy and dusty. He blows on it and immediately regrets his action.
He's about to sneeze and he can't do that without losing balance.
"Cucumber, cucumber!"
John hears the noise and finds Bob falling from the ladder while screaming about that long vegetable.
Luckily he's quick on his reflex and catches the falling Mansel in distress (well sue John for not knowing the male version of damsel, he ain't fluent in french, oui?)
"You okay?" John asks Bob, ignoring the large dusty book that has settled on his head with a loud bonk.
"Achoo." Bob sneezes in reply.
"I'll take that as a yes."
Bob feels a bit flustered and takes the book from John's head. "Sorry about that." He says sheepishly.
"It's fine." John shrugs, still holding the man in his arms, bridal style. "Might bruise a bit."
"Oh? Let me check." Without thinking Bob grabs John's head, bringing it closer for better inspection, while still remaining in the arms of the supersoldier.
To an outsider, it'd look like they're about to share a kiss.
And that's exactly what Alexei thinks they're about to do, when he enters the room.
"Oh, don't mind me. I'm just here to collect a book. Sorry to disturb your..." He makes a vague hand gesture. "moment."
They both slowly turn toward Alexei, Bob still gently cupping John's face.
"Oh hey Alexei. John and I -"
"Da da da...no need to give me details." Alexei says with theatrical resignation. "Much surprised but no judgement. Very sweet. Please continue. I close door on way out."
With that he flees the room, leaving two very confused men behind.
"What was that about?" John finally breaks the silence, Bob still in his arm.
"Beats me." Bob replies, John's face still in his palms.
Two
"Are you sure it'll help me relax?" John asks dubiously at Bob.
They're currently at the exercise room. But instead of exercising, they're doing yoga. Well Bob is doing it. John is still skeptical.
"Of course it will. It helped me to keep the void at bay too, you know."
That finally convinces John.
"Okay but I'm not doing it any weird poses. I am not that flexible anyways."
Five minutes later:
"Am I doing this right?" John asks in his downward dog position. Butt in the air, face down. Bob is standing right behind him, pressing John's back to keep him down cause he keeps looking up.
"You have to spread your leg further and" he grabs John's hips and pull them upward. "More higher please."
"More?" John says.
"Yes. Spread them more." Bob replies, still holding John's hips.
Bucky opens the door, sees the scene in front of him, and leaves the room without saying anything.
Veni, Vidi, Éfyga (I came, I saw, I left)
Three
It is movie night and Yelena gathered everyone in front of the theater. The team needed some entertainment.
They all take their respective seats but she finds Bob is missing. So is John.
She does remember John pulling Bob away and Bucky giving them odd look.
Whatever. The movie is starting so she texts John as Bob didn't bring his phone.
Holy shit!
Bob and John?!!??
Why?
How?
When????
And the fact that the blond idiot openly texted her like this. Shameless bastard!
Who knows what he's doing to Bob right now...
But Yelena can't exactly barge in there like an angry mom trying to save her son's honor. Bob is a grown man. She can't just tell him to stop dating (ignoring the imagination of them hooking up) John. She has no right to judge.
"Ugh!"
"You okay?" Ava asks.
"Yes, just a bit of bloating that's all." Yelena lies. She's in no mood discussing this with Ava or anyone else really.
In the hallway -
"Damn, this line is so long! I'm sweating like a pig." John fans himself and unbuttons few buttons of his shirt.
"Tell me about it." Bob agrees, taking off his jacket.
"Let's just head back. Yelena is already pissed."
Bob agrees and follows John inside. Both of them don't notice the gaze from Yelena who has noticed their sweaty flushed state.
"So it is real..." Yelena can't believe her eyes.
"Of course it's real. They spent four hours doing the trolls make up. No CGI." Ava who hasn't noticed the two, comments about the trolls of the movie they're watching.
Yelena wishes she was this innocent.
Four
Avengers Tower, mid-afternoon. The hallway outside one of the spa rooms. The door is closed and locked. Ava passing by, hoping to relax in there when she hears voices inside: John and Bob, unaware she’s there.
"You’ve gotta relax, John. You’re too tense." Bob speaks, voice muffled, breathy.
John grunts in reply. "Maybe if you didn’t push so deep, I wouldn’t be."
"Well, you asked me to. Said you could handle it." He goads John the way he did in their first meeting. But this time with less malice and more teasing.
They've become very close over the time.
"Yeah, but not all at once, damn. At least give me a second to adjust." John pants.
Ava on the other side is confused. What the hell is going on?
"Where’s that tough guy from the gym, huh? Can’t take a little pressure?" Bob teases again.
"It’s not the pressure, it’s the angle. You’re hitting a weird spot."
"Some people love that spot."
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa- ヘ（°□°）ヘ
Ava can't believe her ears. Is this what she thinks it is?
But...but...but...
She can phase through of course yet hesitates when she hears Bob speak up again. His voice much lower this time.
"Look, just breathe. Let me work it in slow. I know what I’m doing."
Ava: Σ(°□°ꪱꪱꪱ)
"Fine." John says reluctantly "Just… go easy this time."
Bob sighs in relief. "That’s more like it. Gosh, you’re so stiff. No wonder you’ve been sore. Do you want me use more oil?"
Okay, she has heard enough. Now she'll go and bleach her ears and visit her therapist. She needs to get over the trauma of overhearing her two friends having oily sex.
Or so she thought.
As soon as she leaves, Bob opens the door. He has forgot to bring the oil bottle.
He's giving John a massage. It's the least he can do for saving him from the falling beam from the last mission.
Yes, Bob would have been alright but, in this process, sentry would have come out, followed by the void if John didn't stop the beam.
He pulled a muscle while doing so and when Bob saw the poor man groaning in pain in the spa, he felt bad and offered to give him a massage.
He's not an ungrateful friend.
Five
Morning in Avengers Tower. John’s room. The door’s wide open, because of course it is.
Inside, Bob and John are both completely naked, limbs tangled on the floor, mid-yell. A towel lies uselessly across a floor. There's steam everywhere.
"So you're not even hiding this anymore, huh?" Yelena says in her unimpressed disappointed motherly voice.
Bob's eyes widen, panicked "Guys, this is not what it looks like!"
Ava covering her eyes, yet fingers very slightly parted for some reason. "You're literally naked, on top of each other!"
"Hey, what's going o...oh my gosh! Come on guys!" Bucky regrets having eyes today.
"It's not what it is!" John frantically tries to untangle himself from Bob. "Also I'm not naked. Just shirtless, still in my boxer. It's Bob who's fully naked."
"I was taking a shower in his bathroom."
"That's not helping your case, Bob." Yelena shakes her head.
"The hot water in his room broke. I let him to use mine. I didn’t mean fall on me like a wet naked yeti."John says the last part looking at Bob as he throws a towel on the poor guys private parts.
"You walked in while I was getting out!" Bob yells, still on the floor, and wet.
"Yeah because I thought you were done!" John yells louder. "Who the hell showers for one hour?"
"I do. Nothing is wrong with it. It's your fault you fell like a klutz."
"Klutz? You're the one who grabbed me!"
"Well excuse me for trying to save your head from hitting the tile. Clearly I was wrong. There's nothing in it to save."
"What is that supposed to mean? Are you calling me dumb?"
"An intelligent person wouldn't ask that." Bob looks away.
"Oh great, they're fighting like old married couples now." Ava mutters under her breath.
"Listen here you little -" John is about to retort but Yelena stops him.
"Okay. We get it. It's all a misunderstanding. Accidents happen." She glances between the two of them. Bob is trying to discreetly scoot behind the bedframe with his leftover dignity, and John standing in his boxers, jaw tight and pink from more than just the heat.
“But for the love of all things good,” Yelena adds flatly, “next time, lock the door.”
“Or wear pants. Both. Preferably both.” Bucky comments from behind her.
"I need to bleach my eyes." Ava says as she walks away.
"What is going on? What's the ruckus?" Alexei asks her in the hallway.
"Bob and John were bumping uglies and we caught them in the middle."
"WE WERE NOT!" John yells from his room. Clearly has heard her.
Alexei blinks. Then slowly, meaningfully, nods. “Ah. Young love.”
Five + one
"Oh he's dead meat." Yelena mutters as she squints up at the sky.
They're currently in front of the watchtower, looking collectively up at the sky instead of fighting the the monster that was terrorizing the city few moments ago.
Not that they can anyways. Only flesh and blood is left of that creature, thanks to Bob aka Sentry.
Then out of nowhere, he kidnapped John up in the sky.
Now they're here, watching the two guys hanging in the air. Well, one is hanging. Other one is flailing and squirming.
Bucky blinks, watching John kick Sentry and doing zero damage. "Should we do something?"
"Do what? Hose them down?" Yelena deadpans.
"I can't believe John is riding Sentry before me." Alexei grumbles next to her. "I would have looked cooler."
Yelena gives him a "are you Kidding me" look but doesn't say anything.
"Well, it's Sentry. As long as it's not void, we shouldn't worry, right?" Ava looks at Yelena.
"Weren't Bob and John fighting few weeks prior?" Bucky says, shading his eyes from the sun.
"Mostly John being snappy with Bob ever since we caught them in their room."
"Hmm. Maybe we're misunderstanding this situation like before." Alexei offers. "Maybe they're making up. Maybe John wanted to ride sentry and Bob is just fulfilling his wish."
"That's your wish, Alexei." Yelena replies without taking her eyes off the pair above who keeps getting higher in the air.
Around them, a crowd begins to gather. Civilians, bystanders, a few too-eager journalists with cameras aimed up, narrating in dramatic tones.
“INCOMING!” someone shouts, and chaos erupts as people scramble away from the trajectory of whatever’s hurtling down.
A loud thud kicks up dust and pebbles, followed by silence.
Once the air clears, Yelena steps forward, peers down, and sighs heavily. She holds it up.
“Okay. Time to pack up. We’re going inside.”
“What is it—?” Ava starts, but then stops.
It’s John’s U.S. Agent suit. Entirely intact. And very… empty.
"Misunderstanding my ass." That's all she says before entering the tower.
Next day the headlines are expectedly filled with Sentry and John and his naked blurred tushy.
Funnily enough there's no mention of dime store captain America or something equally mocking.
Maybe they knew better than to insult the lover of an invincible guy who can melt the whole NY city without blinking an eye.