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Rimau’s hand’s, calloused and rough, carded through Cadet’s curls. The blonde winced. “Ow.” “My bad.” Si-Rimau said, untangling his hair. “You’ve got way too much hair, man.” He mumbled through the hair tie bit between his lips. “Yeah, makes ya’ look like a girl.” Anden commented from the fresher, where he was standing in the mirror, checking his armor, knocking on the breastplate as if to test its durability.
“I like it this length,” Cadet said absently, his eyes fixated on a spot of the cold gray floor. Everything on this ship was so gray. The floors, the walls, ceiling, and whatever sparse pieces of furniture. All gray. “Yeah, but you don't like managing it.” Cadet shrugged.
Si-Rimau was actually pretty good at braiding, Cadet wondered how he caught on so quickly. He had separated half of Cadet’s hair and braided them into delicate plats, and then brought them around the crown of his skull before tightening them with a band. “Done.” Rimau patted Cadet on the shoulder.
Cadets' eyes stayed locked onto the floor. Anden walked out of the fresher. “What’s up with him?” He asked, gesturing to Cadet. Rimau looked confused, hovering over Cadet’s shoulder. Cadet focused again. “Huh?” “What’s up with you? Why’re ya just.. Staring?” Cadet’s grayish-blue eyes rose to meet Anden’s. “I dun–dunno.. M’ tired.” “We’re all tired.” Rimau said. “I haven’t been.. sleeping well.” “Wow. Shocker. Whoever heard of a trooper not getting meaningful rest.” Anden said sarcastically.
Cadet looked away, as if he couldn't bear to say this while making eye contact. “..I feel guilty.” He mumbled. “..’Bout what?” Anden said, grabbing a chair. “..About Alderaan.” “Why do you care? You weren't the one who pressed the big red button.” Rimau said, slipping on a few pieces of armor. “..No, but.. We work for the guy who pressed that button.”
Cadet remembered standing there, in front of the grand observation window. Rimau and Anden were busy doing their job for once, guarding the cell block the princess had been held in. He remembered the humming sound that emitted from the whole ship as the tractor beam booted up. In a split second, the empire had displayed such pure evil and tyranny.
Before Cadet could even blink, the planet was blown into pieces. The aftershock barely reached the ship, but Cadet felt it. He felt a deep ache take root in his chest, as if he had felt the loss of the entire planet. He was glad he was wearing a helmet, because he couldn’t stop himself from shedding a few tears. There were families.. children on that planet, completely unaware of their horrible fate. And that fact had haunted him.
He felt his eyes grow glassy at the memory. “We don’t get paid enough to show empathy. Besides, they were bad people, Cadet.” Anden said. “Yeah. It was for the best. They were a bunch of rebels. ” Rimau added. “..Yeah but- not all of them.. There were kid’s and– and innocent people–""That’s what happens during war. If you wanna make it through this one, I suggest you not think about it.” Anden said flatly.