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52 Ways to Fall Apart

Summary:

This is a collection of my miscellaneous emotional vents disguised as fiction. Based on prompts from therapy cards I was assigned to a few years back, each short piece is a self-indulgent burst of prose where I made BTS members navigate unresolved feelings, experience trauma, or simply experience the Becoming, which we humans call life.
Some are drawn out and detailed, while others are short and sweet.

Or: My therapist handed me a deck of prompts, and I wrote sad, short, self-indulgent stories featuring the BTS members.

Notes:

Hope you'll enjoy my sad little scraps.
Be warned that not all these stories have neat endings. They’re messy, they’re raw, some have fantastical elements, and are exactly what I needed to write.

Chapter 1: I Thought He Was Not Jungkook

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Jeon Jungkook was a happy, successful, and respectful man. Having been the publisher for the most notable newspaper in town, he was the person I looked up to. His hair was always combed sleek, his shoes were always shiny, his suit always trim, and his face was always adorned with a gentle smile. Despite being such a handsome man, he did not have a wife. Ladies swooned over him, but he never seemed interested. I’ve heard that his eyes had a certain twinkle that made you fall for him. He was so distinguished and celebrated as the star of our town, that I almost didn’t believe a being like him could exist. Until now- since he was right in front of me.

 

Wearing an ironed jacket complemented with a yellow tie, he looked as if he meant business. One leg over the other, he gave me a pointed look that derided my very existence. Even though his face looked sharp, his eyes were kind and warm. I could see the people didn’t lie about the twinkle- it looked adorable to me. He seemed out of place even in his grand house. Jeon Jungkook resembled a prince that belonged in a castle.

“Are you here for the interview?” he spoke up. I couldn’t describe how, but every word he pronounced just seemed right. He was very knowledgeable, I love his articles.

“Yes, we are thankful for the opportunity.” My colleague who was seated beside me replied. It was evident in the over-cheerful way of her speech that Jungook had charmed her. 

“The pleasure is all mine. Sit down, please!”

As she and I began to sat down, I noticed a child sitting on the floor next to the sofa Jungook was seated on. That was… weird. I thought he wasn’t married. Was that his love child? Cousin? Or was he just looking after a neighbour’s kid? Either way, that was very unprofessional of him. Having a baby with you while you give an interview was improper. 

 

“Who are you?” That child spoke up. I was startled, and both the adults looked at me bewildered. 

“Are you alright?” My colleague asked. I nodded. Did she not find the child weird?

Jungook ignored the child’s question and proceeded to ask us about the day. I found that very, very strange. I kept staring at the child, and he looked back with big eyes. He was clearly terrified of us two. I tried to wave at him, but he quickly averted his eyes and hunched his shoulders. Jungook caught my eye, and I gave him a polite smile. 

“Who are you waving to, Mr. Park?” 

I looked at him. And looked back at the kid. He had tears in his eyes. “Are you going to hurt me?” I widened my eyes and pointed at him. “Is your son okay?”

 

Jeon Jungook frowned. My colleague nudged me and spoke in my ear, “What in the heavens are you talking about? Stop acting weird!” 

I was taken aback. She apologised, and the conversation moved forward. Jungook’s voice seemed jittery, but I wasn’t paying attention. I kept looking at the boy. He resembled Jungook in a peculiar way. Almost as if he… 

 

“What were you whispering about?” The child broke down. “Are you talking about me? Do I look weird? I didn’t do anything wrong!” 

 

I stood up abruptly, and raised my voice, “Why are you both not paying attention to him?” Why was Jungook neglecting a child? I thought he was a good man! 

My colleague got up and took my arm, “I am very sorry for his abnormal behaviour, Mr. Jeon. I think he needs to see a doctor.” The man nodded in understanding, and went to open his door.
“I am not crazy!” I tried to snatch my hand away.

Jungkook looked at me worried. The child, although seemed to have calmed from his outburst, remained crying. He looked at me sadly, “I hope you will be okay.”

 

The coworker pulled me out the house, and I still kept shrieking defensively. Could neither of them see the baby? Was I really going crazy? As I saw the door close with Jeon Jungook and the child’s concerned face, I noticed the portrait on his wall which would have explained everything.

The family picture of the father, the mother, and a son that looked all too familiar.

Notes:

This is not a cohesive story, but it is honest.