Work Text:
If Artemis Crock had a dollar for every time Wally West had flirted with her in the last month, she would have enough money to buy this stupid restaurant.
And then burn it to the ground.
“Artemis,” Megan nudged her side, and Artemis turned to look at her; she looked concerned, and offered a smile. That was her nice way of saying that Artemis needed to smile, too. Pissed off waitresses didn’t make good tips.
Artemis smiled back at her, aware it showed too many teeth, and said, “If he calls me babe again I’m dumping this smoothie down his shirt.”
Megan sighed. “He’s just being nice, Artemis-”
“No, he’s being obnoxious. You didn’t see his shit-eating grin last time. He knows exactly what he’s doing. And he doesn’t even tip well!”
“Oh, relax, Art, he’s harmless.” Zatanna breezed into the room right in time to join the conversation (how did she do that?), bringing a new set of orders over to Raquel at the stove. “He just doesn’t know how to talk to you, that’s all.”
“Well, there has to be something he knows how to say besides ‘thanks babe’ and ‘read my mind sugar’ and… and… and asking me what my sign is over and over again!” Artemis sputtered, out of words- but nobody was really getting it. Megan was beaming, Zatanna was trying very hard not to laugh out loud, and Raquel was ignoring them. Artemis huffed. “I’m serious! It’s juvenile!”
“It’s cute!” Megan said. “You two would make such a cute couple!”
“Why don’t you date him, then?” Artemis snapped; when Megan raised an eyebrow she just sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Oh. Right, I forgot to tell you. Conner’s with him.”
Megan squeaked, loudly, and grabbed the menus from Artemis’ hands. “Swap you tables! You have number eight now!”
“Megan-“ But she was already gone, and Artemis groaned.
“I thought you didn’t want the table with smooth-talker.” Raquel said.
“I don’t, but table eight has the weird kid with the cat and that’s almost as bad.” Artemis eyed Raquel suspiciously. “How come you’re not trying to hook me up with him? Everyone else is.”
Raquel shrugged. “He eats too much. Makes me twice as much work as a normal customer. If you start dating him, he’ll come by more often.”
Or maybe, Artemis realized, he’d stop entirely. Now that she thought about it, she knew the type of flirt he was- the kind that liked a challenge. More than likely, ignoring him was the main reason he kept coming back and asking for her over all the others. Zatanna indulged flirts and encouraged them to try harder. Megan was sweet and accepted his compliments because she seemed to think that’s all they were. Raquel was smart enough to never come out of the back when he was here.
Artemis was the only one who turned him down cold. She was the only one he would be satisfied dating, just because it would be ‘winning the game’.
“You’re scowling.” Zatanna said. She raised an eyebrow, sly as a cat. “Care to share why you’re so upset?”
“Two points on that. One, I’m not. And two, Megan’s been gone an unusually long amount of time for just taking orders. So this isn’t going to work, either.”
Zatanna waved a hand dismissively. “Fine, fine, I’ve got table eight. Go see your boyfriend.”
“He is not-“ But Zatanna was already gone. Artemis sighed and shook her head. Whatever. She was going to settle this once and for all.
She strode out the door and into the heart of the restaurant- a gaudy, bright-red joint that always hurt her eyes, and maybe it was just her luck that Wally West matched it in every way. She could see him in the corner, now: bright red jacket, orange-red hair, pale face that made a constellation of freckles on his cheeks stand out. Right now, he was grinning at Megan, who was talking with Conner with single-minded focus and didn’t even seem to know he was there.
When he saw Artemis coming, the smile shifted. Not enough that she could put a name to it, but there was something about it that made her insides twist like she was on a roller coaster.
She had the first thought that maybe she wasn’t reading this a hundred percent correctly, but it was too late.
“Artemis!” Megan said, and she sounded happy but her look was concerned. “I… told you I’d get this table.”
“She couldn’t stay away from me.” Wally said. He leaned forward, chin in his palm, and raised his eyebrows. “Right, babe? It’s not your fault, it’s my charm. It’s irresistible. It’s a curse.”
One of the boys at the booth with him, eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses, coughed; it sounded like “she’s going to kill him”, and Conner inched closer to Megan like he actually expected fallout. Megan looked more concerned instead of less.
“Can we talk?” Artemis asked Wally.
The self-assured smile fell from his face in an instant- it looked like he was lost for words, and Artemis didn’t know quite what to make of it. It didn’t look like she was actually going to kill him, did it? Or did he really expect nothing to come from all his flirting?
“Now.” She said, and turned on her heel so he had to follow.
When she was on the other side of the restaurant, far enough away there wouldn’t be eavesdroppers, she heard his running footsteps behind her and turned around just in time for him to skid to a stop. She put her hands on her hips and faced him down, preparing herself to shut him down as firmly as necessary to make him understand. She wasn’t going to go out with him just for his ego. “Look-“
“I’m sorry,” He interrupted, and she was in shock enough to stop because he was pink all the way to the tips of his ears. “You look like you could snap my neck right now, I’m so sorry, I didn’t meant to harass you, I just didn’t know how else to get your attention-“
Wait. What?
“You… actually wanted to…” She didn’t even know how to finish. This was a first.
He groaned and looked up at the ceiling, hands shoved in his pocket. “Yeah, although apparently it’s going to turn into a restraining order instead of a date.” He said dejectedly.
She couldn’t help it- a laugh bubbled out of her, light and airy and embarrassingly girly, and he looked up hesitantly. Almost… hopefully. “You do know there are ways to get a girl’s attention without badgering her for hours at a time, right?” Artemis said.
Wally shrugged. “Well, none that work.” He paused. “Although I didn’t expect this to work, either, in retrospect. Just… didn’t know what else to try?”
Artemis gave him a more thorough once-over, now that he was standing up for the first time. Just a normal kid, for the most part, and she wasn’t sure why she had thought of him otherwise. A sloppy jacket and t-shirt and jeans. Messy red hair that she actually really wanted to run her fingers through. Bright green eyes that said he would be hard to keep up with but worth it. A ketchup stain on his elbow from where he had propped himself up to look at her- he’d been so preoccupied he hadn’t even noticed.
She’d done stupider things- much stupider- than go out with a boy who really wanted to date her.
“Well.” She said. “As long as you promise not to call me babe ever again, you can have my number.”
His mouth dropped open in surprise, but he quickly shook himself and cleared his throat. “Seriously? Like, your real number?”
“Yes, my real number. Why would I give you a fake one?” She grabbed a napkin off the table next to them and dug in her pocket for her pen- and was surprised to find that her fingers were trembling. Not from fear, not from adrenaline exactly, but just because the rest of her body felt like a live wire, leftover from her laughter and his own nervous energy. Like she had been asleep before and now, now she was awake.
It was a pleasant feeling. One she could get used to.
She wrote down her number and handed him the napkin; he took it from her with something that looked a lot like reverence, and then just stared at it like he had never seen one before. She wanted to say something teasing, something to break the awkward silence, but she had no idea what and they just stood there staring at each other.
“I’ll be honest.” Wally finally said, tucking the napkin in one of his coat pockets and looking back up at her with a grin. “I’ve never gotten this far before. What’s next?”
Artemis kept her game face on. Just to mess with him. “In my experience, usually a date.” She said.
“Right. Date. You got it, ba- uh, Artemis. Sorry. Old habits die hard.”
Artemis put her pen back in her pocket and took his arm to drag him back to the table; Megan looked like Christmas had come early to see them coming over together, and it looked like the boys had taken bets on whether or not she was going to actually kill him and were paying up. Sunglasses-kid was the winner.
“Don’t worry.” She said. “I’ll remind you. And every time you call me ‘babe’, I’ll call you something equally embarrassing. Just to make sure it sticks. What are your thoughts on 'Wallman?'”
He groaned, but when she looked over at him he was still grinning. “You’re really not going to make this easy for me, are you?” He asked.
“No.” She replied. Just to see what he would do with it.
Wally made his fingers into guns and pointed at her. “I can handle anything.” He said. “Just you wait.”
We'll see about that, Artemis thought wryly, but she had a good feeling about him.