Chapter Text
A cool, refreshing breeze blew across the ocean’s surface and gently filled the Thousand Sunny’s sails. The warm noonday sun shone down on the deck of the Straw Hat Pirates’ ship and onto the Straw Hat crew as they basked in the daylight’s warmth. Along the horizon, soft fluffy clouds leisurely tumbled and transformed from one amorphous almost-shape to another. Up ahead, a kilometres-long sea serpent briefly poked its head out of the water, snorted vigorously, then dove back below in a series of sinuous loops. Closer in, off the Sunny’s port side, a flock of terns soared low over the water; occasionally, one would plunge down to snag a fish. A perfect day.
As every sailor knows, weather this nice never lasts long on the Grand Line, which meant all 10 Straw Hats were lounging out on the deck and enjoying the moment.
On the observation deck over the kitchen, the Straw Hat Pirates’ sniper Usopp was fiddling with some mechanical contraption of as-yet-unknown purpose. His hands were greasy and his khaki overalls had many tools and pieces tucked into the pockets. A large, well-organized toolbox was unfolded next to him, and he periodically reached inside for another implement to poke and prod at his mechanism.
Below the observation deck, curled up in a folding chair beside a kitchen window was Robin, the Straw Hats’ archaeologist. She was reading through a trashy romance novel she’d taken off the cook’s bookshelf, while a dense historical tome sat on a folding table beside her with a bookmark tucked between the first few pages.
Slumped in a deck chair on the lawn, the Straw Hats’ first mate Zoro snored softly. His flip-flops had slipped off, and his pale green tank top had a glob of drool slowly soaking into it. An unknown crewmate whose name rhymes with Angie had graffitied Zoro’s face with blobs of sunscreen. A kinder crewmate had moved an umbrella over Zoro so the doodles wouldn’t form a permanent tan.
Sitting around a table on the lawn, the Sunny’s cook, doctor, shipwright, and musician – Sanji, Chopper, Franky, and Brook – were dressed in garishly-coloured floral shirts, sipping lemonade, and playing a game of cards. Sanji, Franky, and Brook were indignantly accusing the others of cheating. Sanji, Franky, and Brook were each cheating. Somehow, Chopper was winning.
Up on the forecastle, Nami and Jinbe – the ship’s navigator and helmsman – were keeping the Sunny on a steady course to the next island. Nami wore a light yellow Galley-La-branded T-shirt tied up to her midriff and a pair of pale blue denim shorts, while Jinbe wore an enormous pair of navy-blue board shorts and an inflatable ring that he’d forgotten was still around his waist. Nami was explaining to her new helmsman all the tricks of sailing the Thousand Sunny in any conditions, as Jinbe listened attentively.
At the ship’s prow, the Straw Hat captain – the 3 billion Berry man, the newest of the Four Emperors, the terror of Enies Lobby, the terror of Impel Down, the terror of lots of other places, the reincarnation of the legendary Joy Boy – Monkey D. Luffy sprawled over the Sunny’s lion-shaped figurehead, like a wax statue that had melted in the sun. His famous straw hat was pushed down over his unruly hair and held on with a drawstring. He wore watermelon-patterned swim shorts and had kicked off his flip-flops to the forecastle behind him. The infamous pirate captain’s rubber arms flopped limply over the lion’s face and stretched like bungee cords down to the water below, where his fingers wiggled in the ship’s bow wave.
Luffy sighed.
Luffy sighed again, louder this time.
Luffy let out a deep, world-weary, woe-is-me sigh.
“What’s wrong, captain?” Jinbe asked with concern.
“He’s hungry.” said Nami.
“Whoa, Nami, how did you know?! I am hungry!” exclaimed Luffy. “And you know what I’m hungry for?”
“Meat?” “Meat.” Jinbe and Nami said.
“Yeah, you’re right! I would eat some meat right now. But also! I miss the food from Wano. It was sooo good... I just, I really miss it.”
“Wano?” said Nami, “Luffy, we just left there yesterday! We had leftovers from the Wano Country with breakfast! If you ask Sanji nicely, he’ll unlock the fridge and you can have more leftovers.”
Luffy considered this for a moment, then sighed again.
“No, you don’t understand, Nami. It’s not the same when I eat it now. It’s missing the sparkle, the splenditude, the spenomenon, the –”
“– phenomenon?” Nami interjected.
“Yep, that. Point is, in Wano, the food was an adventure! They gave me a little map of all the food stalls and restaurants and bars, just before the festival started, and I drew up a route to hit all the coolest-sounding places in the tastiest flavour order... but then I lost the map. But it didn’t matter! Cause then I could discover everything with my own eyes and nose! Like, deep in the maze of stalls I found this stand serving really-spicy yakitori next to a stall with super-chilly kakigori, so I ate yakitori until my eyes started stinging, and then I cooled off with kakigori until my brain started freezing, and then I got more yakitori, then more kakigori, then back and forth until I ate a really spicy skewer that made me belch so hard my tongue got stretched across the laneway – and get this, my tongue had turned blue! It wouldn’t be the same if Sanji fried chicken in a pan and shaved ice from the freezer. Oh, and then when I got full, they had all these games, and I won so many prizes...”
Nami and Jinbe let Luffy’s words wash over them. As their captain spoke, a massive whirlpool suddenly formed ahead of the ship, and Jinbe calmly adjusted course to go around it. Luffy continued talking about what he’d eaten as if nothing had happened.
“Hey Jinbe!” said Luffy suddenly. “You agree, right? That Wano had the tastiest festival food ever? That takoyaki, and the yakitori, and the torikawa gyoza, and the...”
The helmsman tilted his massive head to the side and thought for a moment. “You know,” Jinbe began, “I didn’t have much to eat at the festival. I ate my fill at the banquet.”
“Oh yeah! The banquet!” said Luffy. “I wanted to go to that as well, but Chopper told me people would trip over my neck if I stretched my head into the banquet hall. Man, I wish I could have gone. Was it good?”
“Well–”
“Wait wait wait don’t tell me it was good! Then I missed out!”
Jinbe chuckled. “Don’t worry, captain, I think your festival feast beat my banquet. Every course was delicious – and beautifully presented – but it was a very stiff and formal affair, made somewhat awkward since I was eating alone. Besides, there was too much fish for my tastes.”
“WHAAAT?! Too much fish? But the Wano fish was sooooo gooood!” cried Luffy. His head twisted 180 degrees on his rubber neck and he stared at Jinbe incredulously.
“Yeah, I’m surprised, Jinbe. I’d have thought fish was a favourite of yours. You devoured all those fish dishes when we had that party on Fishman Island.” said Nami, looking up at the 3-metre tall fishman.
Jinbe scratched his goatee, then stratched his ear, then scratched his head. “The thing is...” he began, then paused to scratch his other ear. “Hmmm... the thing is... I don’t exactly love fish.”
“WHAAAT?!” cried Nami and Luffy.
“Honestly, some days I don’t feel like eating seafood at all. Just throw it all back into the sea, that’s what I think.”
Luffy and Nami stared silently at their big blue crewmate.
“Now, don’t get me wrong! I quite like fish. I like all seafood. But it’s not my favourite. I eat seafood because it’s there, it’s healthy, and it’s pretty tasty – but I’ve eaten so much fish, shellfish, and seaweed that it all blends together in my mind. Well, except mozuku seaweed. But look, here’s a comparison: you humans probably don’t think much about the taste of drinking water, right?”
“As long you can’t see baby mosquitoes, it’s good to drink.” Luffy stated firmly.
“Mosquitoes? Wha-”
“Luffy had an unconventional childhood,” said Nami, who also had an unconventional childhood. “Don’t worry about it. You’re right, most people wouldn’t think about the taste of water. Keep going, Jinbe. I never would have guessed you didn’t love fish!”
“It’s just – in my mind, fish is the default. It’s nothing special. We seafolk eat seafood the way you land-dwellers eat, uh, landfood – bread and rice and so on. For me, land food stands above seafood because there’s so much variety that you don’t find under the sea.”
Luffy nodded along, not quite understanding but happy to hear his helmsman talk.
“My favourite is fruit. It’s like candy – but it grows on a plant! Peaches, plums, pears, pineapple, um, blueberries, strawberries... And of course nothing beats the juice-filled crunch of a whole watermelon. Yes, fruit is definitely the best thing on the surface – besides this crew, of course. Wahaha!”
Luffy beamed at his friend and helmsman Jinbe, and Nami punched his arm affectionately. The 3 of them rested in amiable silence, as the wind hummed in the sails and the waves gently rocked the ship. Then, Luffy had an idea. Nami could tell because he made that goofy facial expression that meant ‘I’ve got an idea!’. Jinbe would soon learn to recognize the expression.
“Hey Jinbe! We’ve got fruit growing right here on the Sunny! You should have some.”
“Ah, Usopp’s, uh... Pomp Greens? They’re safe to eat? They seemed quite volatile when he used them against Hody Jones’ goons.”
“Nah, don’t eat those. Last time, Chopper had to pull the vines out of my nose with pliers and it didn’t even taste good. No, I’m talking about tangerines!”
At this, Jinbe turned down to face Nami, who was making a slight adjustment to the ship’s wheel while Luffy had been distracting the helmsman. He frowned, then began to speak.
“Now, I do love citrus fruit, but – Nami, Sanji told me when I boarded that I shouldn’t even think about touching your tangerine trees, on pain of death.”
“Oh, he said that? Isn’t that nice of him.” Nami smirked. “That rule mostly applies to Luffy, because he’d eat every single fruit if we didn’t threaten to kill him.”
“Yep.”
“Since you seem like a reasonable, mature individual who can control his eating habits,” Nami said, “and especially since you’ve just been welcomed as our newest recruit, you may have some of my tangerines, Jinbe. Let me go get you a few.”
Jinbe smiled warmly. “Why thank you Nami, that’s very kind of you.”
“You’re welcome. Watch the Log Pose for a second, please. 3rd needle.”
Nami turned away from the helm and began walking towards the stairs, then paused at the first step.
“Oi! Usopp! Grab Jinbe some tangerines!”
On the other side of the Sunny’s main deck/lawn, Usopp – elbows-deep in his gadget – looked up with a shock.
“Nami, I’m in the middle of something!” Usopp yelled back. “Can’t you get them?!”
“I’m navigating right now! If I look away for even an instant, we could get sucked into a whirlpool or eaten by a sea monster! You don’t want that, right? Get the tangerines.”
“Well, when you put it that way...” Usopp said.
“C’mon Usopp, a brave warrior always helps a lady in distress. Pick tangerines like a gentleman.” said Sanji, looking up from his cards.
While Sanji was looking away, Brook took the opportunity to smuggle an ace from his sleeve into his hand. While Brook was occupied, Franky took the opportunity to peek at Brook & Sanji’s hands. While Franky was peeping, Chopper drank some of Franky’s lemonade.
Usopp stood up and wiped his greasy hands on a slightly-less-greasy cloth. “OK, but do we even have any tangerines?” He looked up at the green trees next to him and their mostly-green fruit. “Like, these don’t look ripe at all.”
“Nami, I don’t want to be a bother,” Jinbe began, before Nami cut him off.
“It’s not a bother at all, Jinbe. You’re one of us now, which means you get to eat tangerines.”
Luffy smiled with a devious grin.
“Occasionally.” Nami added.
Luffy’s face fell.
“Usopp! The ripe ones are at the top! You’ll need a stepladder. There’s one in the kitchen.”
Usopp hopped off the observation deck and onto the lower corridor, just behind Robin, who continued reading unperturbed. He stomped into the kitchen, then stomped back out with stepladder in hand, before hopping back onto the deck. He only grumbled under his breath a little bit.
“Oh, and you’ll need a basket.” said Nami.
Usopp hopped off the deck, into the kitchen, back out with a basket, then jumped onto the deck. He unfolded the ladder. He grumbled a bit more. He stood upon the ladder’s first step, turned to look at Nami, and raised a single eyebrow as if to say: “Anything else?”
Nami leaned on the railing and said, “OK, big guy, go get some tangerines!”
Usopp, still looking at Nami, climbed up the stepladder and began to reach for the fruit.
“Nope, not those ones. Higher up!” Usopp raised a second eyebrow at Nami.
“Do it for Jinbe!”
Usopp climbed to the top of the stepladder, stood on his his tiptoes, and reached for the highest and ripest of all the tangerines. Suddenly, he noticed–
“Oh, and while you’re there, could you pick some for me? Pretty please?” said Nami.
“Guwaaghk!” said Usopp, and fell off the ladder.
Robin promptly sprouted a clone body from the deck beside the fallen sniper and peered down at him. She quickly examined him for any injury; since he seemed fine, her clone raised a thumbs-up before dissolving into petals. Robin returned to reading her smutty novel.
“Oh, Usopp,” Nami sighed. “We just fought two pirate emperors and won. How can you be startled by fruit?”
“D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d,” said Usopp. “De-de-de-de-de-de!”
Nami strode down the steps to the lawn and up the other side – something was wrong. Chopper followed in his muscular humanoid form and gave her a boost onto the observation deck’s roof, then leapt up behind her. Robin’s clone again popped up beside Usopp.
“Well Chopper, what’s up with Usopp? Is he dead?” asked Nami.
“Ah! Um! I hope not! But we should ask a doctor to be sure.
...
I’m the doctor. Right. He’s alive. I’ll do an examination now.”
As Chopper poked and prodded, Usopp sat up and stared at his crewmates with his hands clutched tight to his chest. The others were making their way to the upper deck, though Jinbe kept turning back to keep an eye on their heading.
“OK, Usopp, don’t worry, I have a few easy questions for you...” Chopper said in a soothing voice.
“De-d-de.” replied Usopp.
“How many fingers am I holding up?” Chopper asked, holding up five fingers.
“D. D. D. D. D.” said Usopp.
“And how many fingers now?” said Chopper, transforming into his hybrid human-reindeer form and holding up a cloven hoof.
“De. De.” said Usopp, but then he shook his head. Usopp frowned, opened and closed his mouth, then held up his right hand in a ‘0’ shape. “D?” he said.
“Yeah, his head’s working fine, he’s just in shock from a sudden fall. He’ll be speaking normally soon, once he calms down. Deep breaths, Usopp!”
Usopp began inhaling and exhaling slowly and deeply. “D.”
“But Usopp,” said Nami, “how did you even fall? Did you get startled by something?” Usopp looked around at his assembled crewmates, took a big breath, then opened his left hand.
A fuzzy white orb sat in his palm.
“Devil Fruit.”