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Penelope Featherington picked gently at the edges of the aquamarine dress she was wearing. Her white tights were squeezing her thighs uncomfortably, her tiny black tap shoes were just the slightest bit too big, and the bow in her hair tugged tightly, causing her head to throb. Everything felt wrong. Everything felt off. Which wasn't helping her nerves. Not one bit. Tentatively she peered around the black curtain at the edge of the stage to peek out at the audience. Huge mistake.
Her heart, which was already beating rather quickly, seemed to increase its tempo closer to that of the beats of a hummingbird’s wings. She wished she didn’t have to wear this dress, although she liked the color much more than what her mother usually dressed her in. The color reminded her of the Bridgertons; her favorite people. So much of their big, beautiful house was blue. There were blue walls, blue furniture, blue pillows, blue dresses for the girls, blue shirts for the boys, and blue eyes. So many pairs of blue eyes in nearly every shade. The owner of the midnight blue eyes was her favorite. Probably because he told her that it was her eyes that were the most remarkable.
A flush rose to her cheeks as she closed her own icy blue eyes and tried to ignore the ill-fitting tights and shoes to focus on the steps she knew by heart. The steps that were absolutely ingrained in her young brain after weeks and weeks of practicing. She’d practiced in the weekly rehearsals with Miss Tiffany and the rest of her dance class, of course, but she’d also practiced every time she was over at Eloise’s house too. She’d even practiced very, very quietly in her room every night before bed so as not to disturb anyone in the house.
Portia Featherington hadn’t wanted to pay for Penelope’s dance lessons, let alone drive her to class each week. Penelope had cried miserably when she told Eloise that she wouldn’t be allowed to join her. At that point Eloise’s mother, Violet Bridgerton, had stepped in and offered to pay Penelope’s tuition and drive her to class each week, since she would already be driving Eloise. Portia agreed with a dismissive wave of her hand, caring little about her youngest daughter. When Violet told her the news Penelope had hugged Violet’s legs tightly, staining the woman’s stockings with her grateful tears, as she thanked her for the generous gift. Violet smiled affectionately at the little girl and patted her long red hair with a warmth Penelope had never experienced before.
After that, every Tuesday evening Penelope felt true joy and freedom for one whole hour while she danced beside her best friend and fellow classmates. Dancing made Penelope come alive, and she was sure that she was never happier than when she was dancing.
Eloise was a natural, picking up the steps and the rhythm of the music perfectly, so Miss Tiffany placed her in the center of the group so all the other girls could look to her if they forgot their steps. Things were harder for Penelope because...well, things were always harder for Penelope, it seemed. But Miss Tiffany was so kind and so patient as Penelope fumbled her way through the steps each week.
Penelope didn’t mind that she wasn’t as good as Eloise at dancing. She was there for the happiness it brought her, not to try and be the best, which was fine at first; but when Miss Tiffany started talking about their upcoming recital, everything changed. Penelope became much more nervous about her faltering steps when she thought about performing in front of a crowd. Her solution to this problem was to practice at every given opportunity. She figured that if she knew the steps so well that she could practically do them in her sleep, then she’d be able to overcome her nerves and perform in front of an audience when the time came.
Penelope had always been a shy little thing. Which was okay because Eloise had enough brashness for the both of them. Penelope sometimes wished she could have even the tiniest bit of Eloise’s bravery, but her father’s indifference, her mother’s criticisms, and her sisters’ cruelty had beaten the five-year-old into the small, shy, fearful girl it seemed she was always destined to be.
Eloise had loving parents and siblings who never tried to reign in her wild and boisterous spirit. But Penelope’s family was only happy when she made herself as small and invisible as humanly possible. It was fine. She was used to it. But when she met Eloise and the rest of the Bridgertons she saw for the first time what it was like to just be yourself without feeling like you had to hide. Eloise did that every day and the more time Penelope spent with the Bridgertons the more her true personality began to fill the empty shell that her own family had hollowed out.
Violet and Edmund filled it by showing her what loving parents truly looked like. Eloise filled it by showing her how a real sister behaved. And Colin. Well, Colin filled it by making Penelope feel like she was the most special and important person in the entire world.
Penelope was only five years old, so she didn’t really understand the concept of love or crushes, other than the fairytale books she loved to read, but she knew that every time eight-year-old Colin smiled his biggest, goofiest smile just for her, her heart started beating wildly in her chest. She knew that every time she made him laugh, she felt warm all over, like he was the sun, and she was basking in his light. She knew that when he held her tiny hand, she never wanted him to let it go.
Two weeks before the recital she and Eloise were practicing their routine in the Bridgerton drawing room when Eloise started to complain.
“Penelopeeeee,” Eloise whined, “We’ve been practicing foreverrrrrrrrr. Let’s stop and do something fun instead."
“Dancing is fun,” Penelope pouted.
“Not when you’re doing the same dance over and over and over again, it's not. I already know the steps and so do you.”
“I know. It’s just…” Penelope bit into her bottom lip with worry.
“Just what?” Eloise asked, not unkindly.
“I’m just nervous about dancing in front of a bunch of people. I don’t wanna mess up and embarrass myself.”
As if appearing from thin air, Colin stepped into the drawing room with a huge grin on his face. One of his front teeth was missing, but it in no way diminished his charm.
“Maybe I could help,” he offered.
“Help what?” Eloise asked, confused.
“Maybe I could help Pen practice, so she’ll be less nervous at the recital.”
Penelope’s cheeks warmed and her voice was a whisper when she responded. “Oh. No. That’s okay, Colin. I’ll be fine.”
The smile dropped from his face, and he looked disappointed. “Are you sure? I could pretend to be the audience. If you get used to performing for me, then you’ll have no problem performing at the recital.”
“That’s a good idea, actually,” Eloise said, seemingly surprised that her brother, of all people, thought of something so smart. “I think we should let him help, Pen. He’ll help you get used to dancing in front of someone.”
“Um…” she hesitated, unsure. “Yeah. Okay. You can watch. If…if you really want to.”
His smile was back and bigger than before. “Yeah! I definitely want to!”
Eloise shoved the iPad into his hands. “Good. You can play the music for us while you’re at it.”
It was awful at first. Truly dreadful. It was like Penelope had never done the dance before in her life, despite doing it almost perfectly for the past two weeks. For a while she had to avoid Colin’s gaze because if she happened to catch sight of his dark blue eyes sparkling at her, her mind would fizzle, and she’d forget where she was in the dance and fumble her steps.
Eventually Colin knew the dance as well as both of them and if Penelope got flustered or stuck on a particular step, he’d throw his arms or legs out in a quick gesture to remind her what she was supposed to be doing.
The day before the recital she was performing the routine flawlessly again, even with Colin watching. What was even more crazy though, was that while before she hadn’t been able to perform when she stared into Colin’s eyes, now she couldn’t seem to perform without looking into them. She had performed much better that afternoon with her pale blue eyes locked onto his dark ones. But in the quiet stillness of her bedroom that night, with no goofy smile or penetrating eyes, her steps faltered.
Back in the present Penelope looked out into the crowd trying to find Colin, but there were so many people and the lights in the audience were so dim that she couldn’t find him or the rest of the Bridgertons anywhere, even though she knew all seven of them were out there.
“You ready, Pen?” Eloise asked, gently.
“I…I think so. I’m still scared though. There are so many people, El.”
“It’s going to be fine, I promise. And Miss Tiffany will be in the first row doing the moves, so if you get lost you can just look at her.”
Penelope nodded. “Yeah. You’re right. I’m sure it will be fine.”
The music stopped and the dancers on stage shuffled into the wings to a round of thunderous applause. The moment had come. It was their turn. Penelope, Eloise, and all their classmates held hands in a line and were led onto the stage by one of the older girls named Reese. Once they were in position, Reese left the stage, and Penelope looked out toward the crowd. The blood drained from her face.
There were So. Many. People. It was too much. Penelope panicked and turned away from the crowd as their music started. Eloise and all the other girls around her began to dance, but Penelope was frozen in fear. She wanted to cry. None of it had mattered. She’d practiced and practiced and practiced, but when the time came she was too scared to move, let alone dance. The tears were welling up when she heard a voice call out louder than the music.
“PEN!”
Penelope would recognize that voice anywhere. She carefully turned her head to peek and saw Colin had run to the front row to get her attention. He smiled warmly at her and then pointed to his eyes before running through the routine only a few paces away from Miss Tiffany. Once her eyes had locked on him the rest of the crowd faded away. They were back in the Bridgerton drawing room again and Colin was helping her practice, just like any other day.
Tentatively she turned around and began to dance. Miss Tiffany was going through the motions in a smaller, less distracting way so as not to draw the audience’s attention from the girls on stage. Colin had no such reservations. He performed the routine full out in the front row, shaking and shimmying to Ashley Tisdale singing Fabulous, and Penelope never took her eyes off him. She managed to finish the rest of the dance just as well as Eloise, but when the song was over, Penelope's smile was bigger than anyone elses on stage. And it was all thanks to Colin.
As soon as the song concluded he jumped up and down in the front row cheering her name.
“Yeah! Whoooohooooo! You did it, Pen! You’re amazing! Way to goooooooo!”
Penelope felt her cheeks warm as she was led off stage by Reese. Eloise grabbed her and pulled her in for a hug.
“You did it, Pen! I knew you could do it!”
She smiled sheepishly at her friend, “I almost didn’t though. Thankfully Colin came to my rescue.”
“Colin didn’t dance for you, Pen. You did that all by yourself.”
Her blush deepened as she thought about Eloise’s words. Now that it was all over, she felt a rush of relief that she didn’t have to worry about it anymore, as well as immense gratitude for Colin’s help. He probably felt so embarrassed about having to do that silly dance in front of everyone just to help her. She’d have to make it up to him somehow.
After the recital was over, they waited in their designated area for Eloise’s family to pick them up. Penelope’s family couldn’t be bothered to attend, but that was okay. These days the Bridgertons felt more like her real family than her own. Their support was all she cared about.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Colin was running at her, full speed. She squeaked as he lifted her off the ground and spun her around a few times, praising her while she giggled.
“You did it, Pen! I’m so proud of you! You were great up there!”
He set her down gently, then pulled her in for a bone-crushing hug. He only let her go at his mother's insistence, but that didn't stop him from beaming at her in admiration.
“Colin don’t monopolize Penelope. We all want to congratulate her too,” Violet said, placing a bouquet of flowers nearly as large as Penelope herself into the tiny girl's arms while she wrapped her in a warm hug. Eloise had a bouquet of flowers in her arms too and was receiving hugs from her siblings when Edmund picked Penelope up and cradled her against his chest.
“You were wonderful, Penelope! I can see all that practice with Eloise and Colin really paid off. You were a star!” He placed a quick kiss against her temple before setting her down and scooping up his daughter. “And you, my sweet, are always a star.” He placed a kiss on Eloise’s temple just as he had for Penelope before he began frantically planting kisses all over her face.
Eloise shoved at his shoulders trying to urge him away from her, but she was giggling the whole time.
“Daaaaad! Stop! You’re so embarrassing!”
Penelope and Eloise continued to be praised, hugged, and kissed by all the Bridgertons before it was time to head home. Outside of Penelope’s house Colin told his parents to wait for him as he walked her to her door. She tried to protest, but he would not be deterred. He grabbed her hand and walked up the stairs with her, holding on to her tightly.
At the top of the stairs there was a brief moment of silence before Colin finally spoke.
“You really were great out there tonight, Pen. I’m so proud of you.” He squeezed her hand which he still held.
“I…I don’t think I could’ve done it without you, Colin. Thank you for helping me.”
“Of course you could’ve done it without me, but I’m glad to have been there for you anyway.”
A silence hung between them, and Penelope was just about to turn and enter her home when Colin spoke again.
“You look really pretty in that dress.”
The blush that never seemed to leave her face when Colin was around quickly returned.
"I do?"
Colin nodded enthusiastically. "I mean, you always look pretty, Pen. I like your yellow dresses too, but it's nice to see you in a different color. You look..." and now Colin was blushing quite as much as Penelope. "I like seeing you in blue. It makes it feel like you're a Bridgerton."
A Bridgerton. Penelope sighed. Wouldn't that be nice? "Thank you, Colin," she said, sincerely. "I should probably go—"
“I have something for you,” he blurted out.
“You do?” Penelope asked, surprised.
“Yeah, it’s…well, it’s not as nice as the flowers my parents got you, but I picked this for you earlier. Don’t tell my mum. I stole it from her garden,” he said, conspiratorially.
He held out his hand and there was a single red rose in it. She took it shakily before bringing it to her nose. Maybe it was her imagination, but this one rose somehow smelled sweeter than the dozens of other flowers that were currently weighing her down.
“Thank you. I…I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to thank you for tonight.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Pen. I was happy to help you. I just…I like spending time with you. I think you’re fun to be around.”
There was a short honk from the car reminding Colin that it was time for them to leave. He bit his lip nervously before quickly leaning down and kissing Penelope on the cheek. His own cheeks were just as red as hers when he ran back down the stairs toward the car.
Penelope closed the front door quietly behind her and stood inside the foyer, eyes wide and cheek tingling where Colin’s lips had been. She brought her tiny hand up to brush the skin there and even though she was far too young to understand what love was, she somehow knew that she would love that boy for the rest of her life.