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It was two weeks since Lucas woke up from his coma, and two days since he’d been allowed home. So far everything was going well, Dillon and his friends had been visiting him and he was following the doctors instructions to rest.
Ste had just checked up on Lucas who was currently sleeping in his room, and Dillon was due to visit any time now. If Dillon turned up while Lucas was still asleep, now would be the perfect time to apologise for his actions before he was kidnapped. It was the least he could do, and long overdue.
Right on cue there was a knock at the door, and Ste answered it already knowing who it would be. “Hi Dillon, come in! Let me just check on Lucas, see if he’s still sleeping,” Ste said quietly, walking towards the bedrooms.
Dillon watched him leave in confusion, wondering what was going on.
Before long, Ste returned. “Right, he’s still asleep. I just wanted to have a quick word with you before you went in, if that’s alright?” Ste asked, knowing now was as good a time as any.
“Yeah sure, is he okay?” Dillon said worriedly.
“Oh yeah, he’s fine,” said Ste reassuringly. “It’s not Lucas I wanted to talk to you about. I was hoping to talk to you about what happened before you were kidnapped, about making you leave Lucas behind.”
“Oh right,” said Dillon, his face dropping at the reminder of his ordeal.
“I’m sorry for the way I treated you, I was just desperate for Lucas not to go with you so he could have his operation.” Ste explained.
“I’m sorry for trying to take Lucas away from you,” Dillon said. “He was the only good thing in my life at the time, I missed him so much when I was in that house. The thought of seeing him again was the only thing that kept me going in there, he was all I could think about.” Dillon looked up at the ceiling, trying to keep his emotions in check. The thought of never seeing Lucas again had devastated him, both when he’d been in the house and when he’d been rescued and told about him being in a coma.
“I know, and believe me he missed you so much too,” Ste said. “That boy loves the bones of you, you're the best thing that’s ever happened to him. He’s never happier than when he’s with you. That’s why I thought I had to force you to leave him behind. I knew he’d never survive the plane journey, the only way I could think of at the time was to force you to break his heart. I should have been trying to make you stay in the village.” That was something he’d regret until the day he died. He’ll never forget the look of devastation on Lucas’s face when he thought Dillon had left him behind.
“But me staying in the village would have meant I’d never be free from Grace and Rex. I was desperate!” Dillon tried to explain his actions, hoping Ste would understand why he did what he did. “I didn’t think I had any other choice.”
“Be honest with me Dillon, could I have persuaded you to stay?” Ste asked, already knowing the answer.
Dillon shook his head in response. “No, I honestly didn’t see any other way out. I was desperate.” He hoped Ste would realise he didn’t have much choice, his only option was to run away. With or without Lucas.
“That’s understandable, I can’t even begin to imagine what you went through,” Ste said. “Lucas was lost without you, he missed you so much when you were gone. The only reason he had the operation was for me, he didn’t want me to lose him. He didn’t think life was worth living if you weren’t in it. It was like he’d given up when you were gone, he couldn’t imagine life without you in it.” Ste would always remember having to essentially guilt trip his son into having the operation. In the end he didn’t even want to have it for himself, he wanted it for his Dad.
Dillon was devastated to think that’s what was going through Lucas’s head at the time, that he only wanted the operation if he was still in the village. That he couldn’t imagine a future without Dillon in it. It broke his heart to think Lucas had his operation not only worrying about it not working, but also thinking he wouldn’t survive.
“I feel the same about him, I can’t imagine life without him in it.” Dillon said, hoping he’d be able to get across to Ste how much Lucas meant to him. “I love him so much, he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“I truly am sorry for making you leave the voicemail, and making you break his heart. If I'd known what you were going through I’d never have made you do it. You both needed each others support, yet I took that away from you.”
“You did what?”
Ste and Dillon turned around quickly to find Lucas stood in the doorway, clearly having overheard at least part of the conversation. He was looking at his Dad in anger, hardly daring to believe what he had just heard.
“Lucas, please! I can explain!” Ste said, trying to placate his son. “How much did you hear?”
“Enough to know that it was you who forced Dillon to leave me that voicemail, that it was you who made me have that surgery knowing I didn’t even want it in the first place!” Lucas’s eyes were filled with tears, heartbroken at his Dads actions. “How could you do this Dad? You know how much I love him, how much I wanted him to be there when I was diagnosed yet you still sent him away?” Lucas’s hands were shaking and tears were streaming down his face, he could hardly believe that his dad had done something like this.
“I’m sorry, I truly am!” Ste said. “I’ve regretted it ever since, I know I should have handled things better but you know what I do, I act before I think! I just wanted you to get better, and I know you leaving wouldn’t have cured you.”
“No, you’re just sorry you got found out!” Lucas shouted, walking further into the living room. “Or are you just jealous that I wanted Dillon, that you're not the only important person in my life anymore. You know how much Dillon means to me, you just can’t handle it.” A throbbing pain was slowly starting to build in his head, but he chose to ignore it, wanting to tell his Dad how he really felt. “Well guess what, Dad? I don’t want anything else to do with you, you’ve gone way too far this time! If you hadn’t told him to go, he wouldn’t have been kidnapped!”
“I didn’t know he was going to be kidnapped, that’s not fair,” said Ste, horrified at the suggestion. “I know how much Dillon means to you, and I know you would have gone with him without any hesitation! That’s why I couldn’t let you go, yes I went about it the wrong way but I was panicking. I couldn’t lose you Lucas, I just wanted to keep you safe. You would have died without that operation!” Ste was trying desperately to explain his actions, hoping to be able to repair any damage he’d caused.
Before Lucas could respond, he felt an even sharper throb in his head making him sway on the spot from dizziness. He raised his hands up to his head, closing his eyes and groaning in pain.
“Whoa, hey are you okay?” Dillon said as he rushed up to Lucas, holding on to his arms to keep him steady. “Let’s get you sitting down before you fall down.”
Dillon guided Lucas over to the sofa, Ste hovering at their side in worry. Dillon eased Lucas down, the pains in his head continuing without abate. Dillon sat down beside him, cupping his cheek with his hand trying to get his attention. “What’s wrong Lucas?” Dillon asked, Lucas’s only response was to slump against him.
“Answer us!” Ste said frantically, kneeling down in front of his son to get a better look at him.
Lucas opened his eyes a fraction, wincing in pain. “Head … hurts …dizzy,” he slurred.
Dillon looked at Ste in panic. “We need to call Misbah, ask her to come around. She’s not working today, I can see if she can check him over,” he said, pulling his phone out to call her.
“I’ll do it, you stay with him. Try and get him to lie down, it might help.” Ste had already called Misbah's number, and was waiting for her to pick up.
As Dillon helped Lucas lay down, he immediately tried to hide his face in the arm of the sofa. “Help’s on the way, your Dads on the phone to Misbah. She’ll be here soon, she’ll know what to do.” Dillon said, rubbing his back trying to comfort him. He felt helpless knowing there was nothing else he could do, the only thing he could do was be there for him. Like had been when he’d been in hospital, visiting him whenever he could.
“She’s on the way now, I’ve told her about the pain and dizziness,” said Ste, rushing back over to them. “Is it easing any?” Lucas didn’t respond. “Lucas? Can you answer me?”
“Still hurts … dizzy,” Lucas whispered.
They both looked at each other in concern, knowing there was nothing they could do until Misbah arrived. Dillon had hold of Lucas’s hand as he took deep breaths trying to get the pain under control.
A few minutes later she walked through the door, rushing straight over to them. “What happened? How long has he been like this for?” She asked, looking between Dillon and Ste for answers.
“This is all my fault. I thought he was asleep in his bedroom, but he overheard me having a go at Dillon for trying to leave with him, he got angry with me for the way I was talking to him,” Ste said, knowing now wasn’t the time for Misbah to know the full story. That could wait for another day. Right now his priority was his son and his recovery.
“Oh Ste, you know he shouldn’t be getting stressed out!” Misbah said in exasperation. “He needs to rest, he doesn’t need you shouting at his boyfriend! I’ll ask you again, how long has he been like this?” She reached out for Lucas’s wrist, taking his pulse.
“About ten minutes or so,” said Ste. “What’s wrong with him? Do we need to take him to the hospital?”
“His pulse is racing, and with the amount of pain he’s in and the dizziness you told me about over the phone, I think it’s best we take him. Just as a precaution, it’s better to be safe than sorry,” Misbah responded. “I’ll call an ambulance, if we try to get him to the car he’ll collapse before he gets there.”
———————————————————————————
A couple of hours after Lucas had been taken to the hospital, he was admitted overnight as a precaution. The doctor had left strict instructions not to stress him out any further, as that was what had contributed to the pain and dizziness. He was currently sleeping after being given strong painkillers, with Dillon and Ste both sitting beside his bed.
They didn’t have long to wait before he started to wake up, and both Ste and Dillon took hold of his hands. “Hey,” said Ste quietly, “How are you feeling? You gave us both a scare then!”
“What are you doing here?” Lucas asked. “I told you I don’t want anything to do with you.” Lucas glared at this dad, taking his hand away from his.
Ste looked heart broken, knowing that he’d caused so much pain and anguish to his son. “I know you don’t, but if you’d just let me explain - ”
“No,” said Lucas firmly, “I don’t want to hear any more excuses. I’ve heard enough of them already.”
“Lucas just give him a chance,” said Dillon gently, rubbing the back of Lucas’s hand with his thumb. “I know you’re angry with him, but he’s still your Dad.”
Lucas looked at Dillon incredulously. “Seriously? After what he did?” Lucas asked.
Dillon nodded his head, looking pointedly at Ste. “I’ve not forgiven him fully yet, believe me. Just let him have a chance to explain. Please? For me?” Dillon begged, looking hopefully at Lucas. He even used his puppy dog eyes for good measure, hoping to win him over.
“Fine,” Lucas huffed, “I’ll give you one chance, and that’s it.”
Dillon smiled at him gratefully, knowing he would cave eventually. He always did when Dillon turned on the puppy dog eyes, he never could resist them.
“Thank you,” said Ste gratefully to Dillon. “I told him to leave you that message because I knew you’d not wanna go with him if he broke up with you. I was scared I’d never see you again, you would have died if you’d have got on that plane. I knew without the operation you’d have died, that was your only chance of survival. I couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing you again, I was desperate!” Ste sighed before he continued. “I know I should have made him stay, but I thought he’d just got hooked on drugs. I had no idea what was really going on, no one did.”
“Fine, I understand why you did it, but this doesn’t mean you’re forgiven yet.” Lucas said. “You couldn’t bear the thought that I wanted someone other than you, that’s why you sent him away. You could have tried to make him stay instead, that’s what I’m angry about more than anything! He probably wouldn’t have been kidnapped otherwise. He’s home and safe now, that’s all that matters.” He smiled at Dillon, happy to finally have him home.
They all knew it would take a while for Ste to earn the forgiveness of both Lucas and Dillon, but they would get there eventually. They just needed time to process what had happened and recover from their traumas.
“If I could change what I did that day I would, believe me. Unfortunately I can’t change what happened but I can promise you I’ll do whatever I can to make it up to you. Including helping Dillon stay clean from drugs,” Ste said, knowing that it was a small step in repairing his relationship with his son and his boyfriend. “I’m gonna give you both a bit of time on your own now okay? I’ll be back to see you later if you’ll let me.” He looked hopefully at Lucas, who nodded his head after a moments hesitation.
Ste reluctantly left the room, leaving Dillon and Lucas on their own. “I’m proud of you, you know,” said Dillon, smiling at him. “I didn’t think you’d hear him out.”
“Neither did I,” said Lucas. “I know why he did it, but it doesn’t make it right. What hurts more than anything is that he knew how much I wanted you here, but he ignored what I wanted. I knew you were struggling with addiction and I knew it was Rex’s doing, but he ignored me. He always puts his boyfriends before me, I get sick of it.” Lucas sighed, knowing his Dad probably would never change in that respect.
“One day he might surprise you,” Dillon said half jokingly.
Lucas looked at him incredulously. “Have you met my Dad? He’ll never change.” Lucas said, knowing his Dad all too well. “He’s blinded by love, that’s the trouble. Anyway, enough about my Dad. I’m just so glad you’re home and safe, if I hadn’t been in a coma I don’t know how I would have coped knowing you were in danger.” Lucas had got the shock of his life when he’d been well enough to be told what had happened while he’d been in hospital.
Dillon squeezed his hand in comfort, leaning over to kiss him on his forehead. “I’m here now, and you’re on the road to recovery. That’s the most important thing. I’m never leaving you again, you’re stuck with me.” Dillon said, smiling at him.
He’d never forget the sight of Lucas lying comatose in the hospital bed, with the big bandage wrapped around his head and the black eye from the brain bleed.
They both looked at each other, knowing they’d be able to support each other through the next few months. It wouldn’t be easy, but they knew it would be easier if they were together. Both back in each other's arms, where they belonged.