Work Text:
“What are you smiling at?”
He looks up from his phone at Clair’s curious eyes.
“Is it Mommam or a different cat? Show me!”
Back in high school, Kongthap used to know girls who’d peek unceremoniously at his screen, or even steal one of his earbuds to check what he was listening to; Clair never did that. Sitting across from him, slurping her noodles, she waits patiently for him share. He never really stopped to think of how many years they had been friends, but it never came to him as a surprise that he liked Clair.
“It’s not a cat,” he says, placing his phone on the table. Face up, not down.
He can see from the uptilt of her lips that Clair finds his response highly amusing.
“You don’t smile at anything other than cats. It’s not like you’re dating someone.”
She’s laughing before she even finishes her phrase.
Kongthap drinks his broth.
She kicks him in the shin and he chokes.
“Are you for real? You’re dating someone for the first time and you didn’t think of telling me? I want a divorce.”
Still a little out of breath, he says, “I’m not dating anyone.”
Clair squints her eyes at him, analyzing him as he rubs his abused shin.
“Talking stage?”
Kongthap places both of his elbows on the table, eyes flickering towards his screen when it flashes with a new message. It takes him a few seconds to notice that Clair was trying to catch his eye again, with that all-knowing lopsided smile that he had come to recognize.
“It’s very new,” he says, in way of apology. In a swift move, Clair leans forward, and Kongthap quickly reaches forward to balance her bowl before she knocks it over or spills it on her uniform.
“Talk to me,” she asks, feet kicking underneath the table.
Not tell me everything, as his mother used to say, which always rendered his mind blank, but talk to me. So he could piece the story together at his own pace.
Kongthap taps a foot gently against Clair’s; an act of appreciation and affection.
“He sent me a love letter,” he starts, as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Clair’s jaw drops.
“Like, handwritten?”
Kongthap nods, and Clair seems to vibrate with excitement.
“He meant it for someone else.”
Watching her deflate makes Kongthap chuckle.
“Like, how?”
“He left it anonymously with a cat at a cat café.”
Clair looks at him like she’s planning to get him an appointment with psychiatry at their earliest convenience.
“It was his crush’s favorite cat,” Kongthap says, sipping his water. “But she had a change of plans and didn’t come in that day.”
“He left an anonymous letter,” Clair deadpans. “With a cat. Presumably without using the recipient’s name?”
Kongthap nods. The most reasonable explanation in the world.
“It’s a very particular cat.”
Riri didn’t get along with most patrons. Kongthap didn’t think it was a bad plan.
“So I went on a date with him,” Kongthap continues. He didn’t think Clair’s eyes could get any wider, but he’s wrong sometimes.
“You went on a date with him.”
“It was his idea. It was all planned in the letter.”
“You went on a blind date with a guy who left a love letter with a cat.”
Kongthap tilts his head, trying to recall the precise moment he made that decision. He can’t.
“I didn’t have anything going on.”
Clair closes her eyes and shakes her head briefly. Kongthap knew she would understand.
“So what happened when you showed up and you were not the person he meant to ask out on a date?”
Kongthap can feel his cheeks start to hurt as he does recall it.
“He was very shocked, but he just went along with it.”
He had blinked multiple times when Kongthap talked to him. It was so easy to spot him; he was wearing the red vest he had mentioned in the letter. He had turned the same shade of red as the vest when Kongthap showed him the letter, and spluttered many words, but when Kongthap asked him his name he just said, “…Atom.” Kongthap introduced himself, and they walked out from the train station together.
All through the film they watched together, Kongthap could feel Atom was tense. They didn’t know each other and Kongthap didn’t know where to begin a conversation, so as they exited the movie theater, Kongthap turned to him and asked, “What’s your favorite cake?”
Atom blinked repeatedly again, then answered in a questioning tone, “…red velvet?”
It made Kongthap huff a laugh, considering Atom’s whole… redness. It made Atom blush harder, but Kongthap just turned and walked off to the food court.
When he stopped by his favorite desserts shop, he looked behind him, and Atom was slowly following him, just like Momman would. A bit cautious, a bit curious.
When they sat down with their respective cakes, Kongthap finally asked, “What else do you like?”
And as it turned out, Atom liked many things.
“You really like him, don’t you?”
Kongthap doesn’t know what to say to that, so he just nods. His spoon is suddenly so interesting to look at.
“You’re actually blushing? I didn’t even know you could do that!”
Clair laughs, and Kongthap’s phone lights up again with a new message. He picks it up and Clair decides to slurp up the rest of her noodles.
“He’s… a bit like a cat, actually,” he says, still looking down at his phone, at the picture of Atom’s contact. “He can be grumpy when he doesn’t get what he wants, and he perks up instantly if you mention buying him sweets. But if I buy him too much, he scolds me.”
I can’t eat that much sugar, Thap, he’d say, but he still took all of them home anyway. Kongthap is thinking of arranging jogging dates. Maybe Atom will feel better about sweets if they jog together every morning. If Kongthap is able to wake him up on time.
“So when are we having a double date?” Clair asks him, leaning forward on the table again, but her bowl is now empty and at a safe distance.
Kongthap opens his mouth to reply when their phones signal the end of their break.
“I’ll talk to him,” Kongthap tells her as they take their trash to the nearest bin and Clair nods, smiling brightly.
Their shift resumes, but even as the patients come, Kongthap is thinking about treats.
Atom is very much napping on the café’s table. Standing beside his chair, Kongthap almost feels like he shouldn’t wake him up. He knows Atom has been practicing recipes late into the night by how his messages keep coming even when Kongthap has a night shift. But it’s been so long since he had a shift that ended before sunset, and he really wants to hear Atom talk. Would it be unkind?
Atom wakes anyway when Kongthap sits in front of him. Head perking up first, just like Mommam would when he heard Kongthap come home.
“Thap!” Atom says, and instantly moves to smooth down his hair and wipe away the drool at the corner of his mouth.
“Caffeine lost its effect?” Kongthap asks. Atom gives him a sheepish grin.
“It be like that sometimes,” Atom says, and takes a sip from his cup, then instantly regrets it. Kongthap laughs.
“What did you have planned?”
“Oh! You know there’s a new Mexican restaurant in town? I think it opened last week. I’m really curious about it!”
Atom is always curious about different cuisines, always ready to learn. It’s one of the things Kongthap really likes about him.
Kongthap hums, and Atom waits, eyes bright. But his skin is too pale, and Kongthap can’t ignore it.
“Maybe some other day, Atom.”
Atom, who had been eagerly anticipating his answer, instantly stands up, then drops back on his seat just as fast once he processes Kongthap’s answer.
“Oh. Oh, right, of course. You’ve been having a lot of late shifts, I’m sorry, I didn’t think of that, you’re a nurse, you should probably–”
“Atom.”
The young man’s rant halts instantly, and he blinks up at Kongthap. It takes all of Kongthap’s will not to pat him on the head.
“Wanna walk with me?”
Atom’s smile is gentle. A little tired, but still sweet.
“Yeah. Of course.”
They’ve known each other for a little while now. A few months, a few dates. They’ve shared messages and fears and the moon. But when Kongthap takes Atom’s hand as they walk together, there’s still a funny feeling inside of him. Like he’s dangerously empty and full, all at once. When Atom smiles at him, he’s hot and cold, strong and weak in the same measure. Together, they walk, as the sun, like autumn, slowly loses its graceful orange glow.
When they finally sit down on the rocks by the beach, the sky is already mostly dark. They can hear people in the distance, but the two of them are quiet. Atom has his head on Kongthap’s shoulder, and Kongthap only knows he’s awake because he can feel Atom’s hand move on his. Fingers squeezing, caressing. As if celebrating Kongthap is there.
Every day at the hospital is so busy. But now, it’s finally quiet.
He’s not sure what it is when he feels the wet warmth on his cheek. He moves his head to the side, and the Atom that he thought was almost asleep is looking at him. It’s dark now, but the street lights are already on. Kongthap can see Atom, still sleepy, but his eyes reflect the glittering water. His cheeks are red like red velvet cake.
“Do you want to come over to my place?”
Atom’s smile fades, and he blinks. Once. Twice.
Then he jumps. Kongthap pulls him back down.
“I–“
“I can make dinner while you rest.”
The panicked look in his eyes fade, and he deflates like a balloon.
“But you’ve already worked all day…”
Kongthap shrugs.
“I don’t mind.”
It’s true; he’s a bad liar, so Atom would know if he lied. And Atom had worked all day too. He just didn’t think studying cooking was as important as being a nurse, but Kongthap disagreed.
Ever since he met Atom, he started having more interest in food and cooking. Food could be like a companion on a journey. It could energize you when you needed, and cheer you up when you were sad. And when you’re tired, it could be like a blanket, ready to cover and comfort you.
Just like Atom.
Kongthap cooks for a couple of hours, and the whole time, Atom naps on his couch. After he’s finally done, Kongthap walks over to wake him up, and sees Mommam on the floor, looking at sleeping Atom with big, round eyes.
Atom, as if sensing he’s being stared at, slowly awakens. He stretches his arms first, and then settles right back in the position he had been in. Kongthap had seen Momman do the same thing many times before.
When he chuckles, both man and cat look at him, blinking slowly.
Clair had been right after all.
He does love cats.