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Law hates Ace.
He hated the carefree attitude, the way he smiled like nothing else in the world mattered. He smiled like the world was good, and Law hated the way he looked at him like he was the good in the world. He hated the way for a second, that look in his eye made him think he might be right. For a brief moment when looking at Ace, Law thought maybe there was good in the world, and maybe he deserved a piece.
He hated how easily Ace slipped into his thoughts, amongst his crew, tangled in his sheets. He never stayed long, always just enough to make sure Law was craving more. He showed up every few weeks, conveniently staying on a random island Law had docked at. Law swore up and down he hated when he did that, but he never turned him away.
It was one night, long past midnight when their friendship became something more.
"You should have seen the way Marco reacted! He was so angry!" Ace laughed, so loud he was sure it would have woken his crew.
"I'd be annoyed as well if you dyed my skin blue, Ace-ya" Law frowned, his hat covering his eyes as he pretended to sleep.
"He told Pops on me and I was on dish duty for a week" he groaned, Law sat up now, determined to shut the man up, even if just to test if he could.
"Have you tried washing-" Aces squeak cut off his own sentence as Law tugged on his hat strings and pulled him so close their lips almost touched.
"God, do you ever shut up?" Law groaned.
He didn't know which of the two connected their lips, but Law felt fireworks in the cheesiest sense, like all the sea stopped moving and the world fell away. Like there was no one left but them.
Ace was still lost for words as they broke apart, the quietest Law had ever seen him, "there we go, good boy" Law murmured as Ace was finally left speechless.
Ace seemed to show up more after that, invading Law's space like he was meant to be there. Law hated how he fit like a jigsaw piece in his arms. Law called him 'his parasite' in a tone that screamed disdain, with eyes that screamed adoration. Shachi gossiped with Penguin about the look on Ace's face and the matching smirk on Law's. No one questioned it, no one needed to. Law got angrier and more sullen the longer Ace stayed away, and the weight always lingering on his shoulders seemed lighter when Ace returned.
"Don't look so grumpy, cutie, a smile suits you better" Ace grinned, cupping Law's face with his hands.
"You were gone two months, Ace-ya, you didn't even call" the usually stoic man pouted like a kicked puppy.
"I'm here now, my sweet, I'll be here for a while, pops gave the okay for some time off" he smiled, that smile that made Law's world a little brighter.
The 'I love you' was silent, the way they pressed their heads together felt like they passed the message between them silently.
Law hated that Ace had become the sun, the moon, and every star in Law's sky. He hated that not a moment went by that he didn't want to share with Ace. He hated that since the war of the best, the sun felt like a fraud. How dare the birds chirp if Ace couldn't hear it? The audacity of flowers to bloom when Ace could tear feel the softness of their petals? How could the waves still crash when he would never see Ace's stupid little boat appear on the horizon?
He hated that yet again he was forced to leave a loved one behind and live his life without them. He hated himself for not saving Ace, if he hadn't been late, if he had been better.
He saved Luffy. He tells himself this is what Ace would have wanted. Tells himself Ace loved his little brother more than anything. So he works on healing Luffy like his own life depended on it. Like if he did more to help Luffy he could drown out the voice in his head telling him he saved the wrong brother. He shunned himself each time he thought of how bad he wished it were Ace on his operating table.
“You loved him” Luffy spoke one day, years after the dreaded day, speaking like it was an obvious statement.
Law didn't respond, he only grunted, and absentmindedly wrote Ace's name in the dirt.
“He loved you too” Luffy replied, echoing the words they had never spoken directly.
“I know” Law replied, trying not to let tears fall as a breeze distorted Ace's name in the dirt, “I know”
Law wishes love could save lives like in the fairytales parents told naive children. Then he wouldn't need an Ace of Spades, hidden under his left arm, in memory of yet another love he couldn't save.