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It's weird, they'd never imagine themselves in this situation, they've had nightmares about this. Holding on for dear life as the floor kept falling apart, they dreaded to look down since they knew it was a long fall.
Please please, doctor. Save me..
They begged in their mind, Sunny put all their trust in that alien and now they know how foolish that was. Their hand already threatening to just give out and let them fall to their doom. They were so close on just giving up themselves.. they were so tired, what was the point? the doctor isn't going to save them, he's off somewhere to fix another problem, maybe snogging some other person again.
They gasped as their hand almost fully slipped, they weren't going to be able to hold on for more than a minute, already losing all their hope. Zero sign of being able to stick the landing, no sign of help and certainly no sign of the doctor.
Sunny sighed, closing their eyes before finally letting go.
And then they opened their eyes to take everything in, they were falling down for what felt like ages. Others say that in this moment your best memories flash before one's eyes but all they could think about is all the choices they made that lead up to this exact moment.
Going into that stupid box, trusting that stupid doctor and now they're falling to their death.
They didn't deserve this, they've been good they had a decent life, had a decent job and all that changed when they stepped into that blue police box.
Were they always fated to have their worst fear come true? Dying in a strange place with nowhere to look to for familiarity. Originally their fear was just dying alone but with their eyes falling on these different times and planets that the doctor showed, their fears also grew and grew.
They didn't want this.
It felt like they'd been falling for hours, they closed their eyes again and let their tears be wiped away by the wind as they just drowned in their own thoughts.
So drowned in their own thoughts that they didn't even hear the tardis wheezing sounds. About a second before their body met the ground and splattered all over the ground. The doctor had managed to catch them.
"Got ya.." The doctor softly said reassuringly but their expression was numb, no sigh of relief, no smile of hope. Just a deep stare into his eyes.
Sunny didn't know what was worse, the doctors smile like nothing bad happened or the fact that they didn't die.
They walked away from the doctor and he tried to shrug off their distance. He was already walking to the console like that had just been a normal adventure. "So where to next? I know a great spot on pluto! Oh or we could go to ancient Greece and-!"
"Take me back home, doctor." They interrupted without missing a single beat. The doctors hearts dropped but quickly cleared his throat to hide his dissapointment.
"Alright! I could.. drop you off at Cardiff since the old girl needs a refill anyway, how about that?" The doctors eyes moved away from the monitor screen to check on them, they briefly looked back at him before leaving his gaze and crossing their arms.
"That's fine."
"Cardiff it is then" They could feel the awkward tension, it was so thick they could cut it with a knife. Sunny didn't care they just ran through the tardis corridors to find their room. The doctor was nice enough to give them a spare room when they complained about their exhaustion, they didn't know why he couldn't just bring them back but they just shrugged it off at the time.
They searched threw their drawer for something. A pen and paper, were they really going to do this? Leave the doctor? He's shown them so many magnificent things but it's so dangerous and they've always been scared, the doctor deserves someone that's the opposite of them. Either way they felt like it wouldn't affect him as much since the whole time they spent here, he never really got the hint that they liked him.
It was a strange feeling, falling for the doctor, you know he's bad news and yet he just looks at you and smiles, that incredible smile and you forget all about it, all about those daleks, cybermen and those weird slitheens. He wasn't perfect but that's the only word they could pick to describe him, even if he never really saw them. Everytime they looked into his eyes they could see that he already wants someone else, someone he can't have and then their heart sinks because they know they can't compete with that person.
They quickly shook their head to stop all these thoughts from distracting them. They had to write this letter, a goodbye letter.
In the middle of writing the doctor knocked at their door without opening it, "are you coming? I've made sure it's the right time.. well about 2 days off but it's fine! I also thought we could maybe grab some fish and chips while we're here?" The doctor said, wanting to see them again.
"You go ahead, I'll meet you there." Sunny responded back to him. They could see his shadow from beneath the door, he stood there for an extra second as if he was dissapointed but then they saw the shadow dissappear, they could only assume that he has left the tardis.
In the letter, they wrote;
Doctor, you have been a wonderful experience but a dangerous one aswell.
I'm not meant for this life you've chosen and I've decided to go.
It's for the best, i would only hold you back, you deserve someone as brave and quick witted as you and im not that. So its my time to leave, i dont want to go but you and i both know that it would be better this way.
I'll leave you with my glasses, as a sort of remembrance so I'll never be far. But please dont try to stop or find me.
Keep them safe,
I love you.
-S.N
They hadn't even realized that they were crying until they saw a drop of water hit the paper, staining it slightly. They wiped away the wetness on their face and folded the letter neatly.
They left their room with the letter in hand, walking through the tardis halls for the last time. Then they were met with an empty console room, it did feel off, they've never seen it empty before, the doctor was always in here keeping himself busy with all sorts of things.
They sighed, knowing that this would probably be the last they see this place. They placed the letter down on the controls, making sure not to hit any random buttons that would send this ship flying. Leaving their round, colourful glasses aswell like they put in the note.
Grabbing their jacket from the rails and finally walking towards the tardis doors. They took a deep breath in before opening the door, looking back into the tardis with a soft frown as if they were saying goodbye to the ship aswell, they were going to miss this.
And finally they were gone, they successfully caught a bus back to their home without the doctor noticing or stopping them, maybe it was the right choice to leave him. They felt bad at the thought of the doctor walking back to the tardis, food in hand after he patiently waited for them. God they're already crying at the thought of it but they can't turn back now, they'll just have to live with the guilt forever. The guilt that they hurt the doctor to avoid him hurting them first.