Archive of Our Own

Carmen Diaz is due any-day now to give birth to a baby girl. Actually, she was due a few days ago and tensions have been higher than ever as each day passes. She's beyond uncomfortable and they boys are always trying their best to help her with whatever she needs. Johnny does his best with her mood-swings, never picking a fight. 

Miguel hates watching his mom in so much pain, it makes him think about if this is what it was like when she was pregnant with him. Was she this miserable? How does she not hate me?

Johnny has been spending most of his nights with Carmen, leaving Robby to an empty apartment, which he doesn't mind. Miguel comes over sometimes and watches movie with him till it gets to late and he returns home. Sometimes he stays over though if they accidentally fall asleep--but that's rare. 

But things haven't been going so well for Robby Keene since the Sekai Taikai officially ended a few weeks ago. He's not exactly very mobile, so it's hard to leave the house. That means everyone has to come to him, but everyone had other priorities. 

At night, he face times Tory. He cant even remember the last time he even saw her due to the fact that she’s seeing sponsors almost every day now whenever she's not taking care of her younger brother, Brandon. The sponsorships have been going well for her and it seems like she's finally able to put out enough money to support her brother--he couldn't be happier for her. He also tells her to bring Brandon over to stay the night because the apartment would be empty, but Tory is never keen on the idea of bringing her little brother to Johnny Lawerence’s beer-smelling place, even though Robby assures her it’s better now.

He wishes she'd come. 

So, when he’s not with Miguel or facetiming Tory, he sits on the couch and watches TV or lays in his bed and does the same exact thing. Things aren't exactly exciting right now, actually they’re the exact opposite. There's nothing new on instagram, tiktok is always the same. His injury at the tournament went viral, that's one thing, but even now no one comments on the posts anymore or even talks about it. Even though some of the comments were hateful towards him, he'd read them because somehow they still made the tournament feel alive. The supportive comments always made him tear up. 

After leaving Barcelona, he realized that he learned a lot about himself. All his sadness during the beginning of the tournament wasn't just about Tory–it was everything from his life bubbling to the surface again and it got the worse when Miguel and his dad left to come home together to make sure Carmen was okay. With the two of them gone, specifically Miguel, Demetri and Eli didn’t have to pretend to care about him and left him at that bar. No one knows about what happened with Zara besides Sam and Miguel--he hadn't even told Tory, but it felt very good when she beat Zara in the tournament. Sam wanted to give the boys a piece of her mind for leaving him but Robby knew that he would never be her first priority either. Miguel didn't know how to react when he had told him about the incident with Zara, so Robby brushed it off and told him it wasn't a big deal so he shouldn't worry about it.

He didn't want to burn his skin off or anything. 

Things with Mr. LaRusso weren’t perfect either. He knew that his first sensei probably wanted him to succeed and secure that win for Miyagi-Do, his first student. But he failed. He could feel Mr. LaRusso's disappointment in him since he flunked in the beginning of the tournament, that feeling never subsided. 

Miguel won the Sekai Taikai, of course. It only makes it a little better that it was under Cobra Kai’s name and not Miyagi-Do. Kreese of all people told Johnny to take his Cobra Kai back to fight against Silver and the Iron Dragons, so his father did and elected Miguel as the captain to give him that shot. This was only allowed because Miguel and Johnny were Cobra Kai legacies. 

He stayed quiet and kept his emotions below the surface after the incident happened.  He was happy for Miguel, of course, and was there for him as his brother to give him the pep talks. Watching Miguel fight the boy who broke his knee with no hesitation was hard--one, in fear of Miguel suffering the same fate and two, knowing that it was always going to end up this way. From the beginning, he knew the world would align somehow for Miguel to come out on top. After winning the captaincy spot he thought that for once he could change that prophecy, but there was always that little voice in the back of his head saying it’s going to be Miguel, you know it. Everyone just loves Miguel–and why wouldn't they? He’s strong, he’s nice, he has a good family. He has everything. 

And now, he hasn't spoken to his dad much at all. Robby doesn't think Johnny really knows what to say to him anymore, but all he wants is for him to say something, even if it’s as small as you did great kid or you would've won if Axel didn't break your leg. 

Sam said something, though. Even though in the end Miguel is her first priority too, in the hospital she gave him a hug and told her she was sorry for what happened to him. The two had a different relationship then anyone else on Miyagi-Do, a relationship that’s been through a lot but is deeper then most of them think. No one else was there (besides Demetri) for the early trainings at Miyagi-Do and no one understood how connected and balanced you had to be with each other. They were connected on a level that no one else understands and in the end that’s manifested into a strong friendship, which they’re both fine with. Robby appreciates Sam as a person and is happy that they were able to keep some part of their relationship that they had before the school fight because she understands the work he put in, cause she did the same. Even though she had never been a part of Cobra Kai before, she understands the importance of Miyagi-Do just as much as he does. She’s read books about Okinawa, she’s heard all of Mr. Miyagi’s stories just like he had. She gets it. She gets how important winning for Miyagi-Do would've been, cause she didn't either.

Even though they dated and has a messy break up, their love was important for that time in their lives. They both unspokenly know that and appreciate the time they spent together because it helped them grow into the people that they are today--more mature and confident.

Tory did of course too, and she gets it, just on another level. A life level.  Tory also won, of course and he’s so proud of her. He just still wishes she had never gone to Kreese. Seeing Miguel and Tory on the podium brought tears to his eyes. What kind of tears were they, though? He was so happy for them, so proud… but so absolutely devastated that it wasn't him and his girlfriend up there, or even him and Sam leading Miyagi-Do to victory. Instead it was Cobra Kai. But at least it was his dads. 

But that Cobra Kai was the one he could never be a part of. The one where his dad chose to give Miguel his old Gi--the one Robby wore when he was just a kid playing around, hoping to one day grow into it and have his dad teach him how to become badass. He just never grew into it. 

And this is how life has been the past week or so since they’ve gotten home. So much inner turmoil and no way of getting it out. 

He wants to talk to someone about it, but he knows he’s just going to feel selfish in the end. He had made right with everyone, had everything he wanted. Their dojo won the world championship. He had a dad. He had a baby sister coming into the world. A family, isnt that what he always wanted? It would be selfish.

Usually Tory probably would've said something about his behavior by now, but because she’s been so caught up in her life--she hasn't noticed. 

He just wants his dad too, really. 

His dad has been so focused on this baby--why shouldn't he be? His baby sister that he’s so excited to meet, but his dad is so ready to be… a dad. 

I shouldn't feel this way. Why do I feel this way?

Now, Robby sits in the living room, on the he’s glued to, with a leg thats on fire, watching another movie. It’s almost midnight, and he knew his dad wouldn't be back and he guessed Miguel wasn’t coming over. 

He wants to get up and go get something from the fridge but it would take too much effort. He hasn't seen anyone all day and no one has checked in. His dad usually does once a day, at least. All he knew is that his dad took Carmen to the doctors this morning for another checkup and to maybe get an estimate on when this baby is actually going to come. Miguel wasn't around, he thought he heard him say something yesterday about hanging out with the boys–which he guessed didn't include him.

But it’s okay, of course. Miguel has his friends. He's allowed to.

He switched off the movie he was watching and threw on Friends , his comfort show. Friends was just always on growing up so either his mom would have it on or it would pop on nick at nite and he’d watch it till he fell asleep, not fully understanding all the jokes. When he got old enough, he watched all the seasons and fell in love with it-–claiming it to be his comfort show. He always hoped that he’d end up with friends like that one day. So he threw on a random episode and let them play, episode after episode until his eyes started to feel heavy. He falls asleep, like he has many time to the show, leaning against the back of the couch pretty uncomfortably, but with his leg there weren't many comfortable ways to lay so propped up on the coffee table was the way to go for now. 

He doesn't know how long later, but he’s startled awake by someone barging into the apartment. He jumps up despite his injury and is ready to fight, but softens when he realizes it’s Miguel. 

“ROBBY!” Miguel almost yells and runs up to him to support him. “IT’S TIME!” 

“W-What really?” Robby asks, rubbing his eyes. 

“It’s time,” Miguel smiles. “My mom’s water just broke.” 

Robby smiles for the first time in awhile, a genuine reaction to Miguel's excitement. “So, so you’re going to the hospital?”

“ We’re going to the hospital bro!” Miguel tells him. 

“Oh no," Robby breathes softly as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "I just gonna slow you guys down, hasn't dad been perfecting the perfect drive time? That doesn't account for me and my broken-ness,” he says in a pained laugh.

Miguel scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Get in the car Keene."

Robby nods, happy that Miguel had thought to come in and retrieve him. 

Miguel grabs Robby's crutches and hands them to the stumbling boy. They leave the apartment together and hobble towards the parked car. It's still dark outside, it must be the middle of the night. When they get in the car, his dad's fingers are rapidly tapping against the steering wheel as he waited for them. He drives like his usual-maniac self, except this time he stays pretty efficient. 

Soon enough, Miguel, Robby and Rosa find themselves in a bright-flourescent waiting room, watching the clock tick by second by second. Miguel's on the phone with Sam who is apparently on her way with Daniel and Amanda. Robby slouches in his seat watching the boy pace around and Rosa tap her foot anxiously. He feels a wave of tiredness hit him and wants nothing more than to close his eyes and shut everything else out. 

The LaRusso’s arrive soon enough with some balloons and gift bags. Sam runs up to Miguel excitedly as soon as she sees him. He pulls her into a tight hug and effortless swings her around, before placing her back on her own two feet. Sam then turns to Robby and for some reason her posture deflates.

"Hey Robby," she breathes. She moves to hug him too, but gently as if she’s going to break him or something. 

Surprisingly, Daniel sits next to him after they all settle into the waiting room and starts up a conversation. 

“How’s the leg kid?” Daniel asks, tapping his shoulder. 

“Oh you know, broken knee,” he tries to joke, but no smile comes out. 

“Are you okay though?” he asks, straight to the point. His voice is soft, but laced with concern.

“Of course, why wouldn't I be?” Robby responds, genuinely curious why he was asking. Do I look sad? Is it showing?

“I just could guess that you're going through a hard time right now.” 

Robby looks at Daniel with his mouth slightly agape.  Why because it’s not easy seeing my dad so ready to be a dad? 

“I know it couldn't of been easy losing the tournament, and being left with your leg. It’s unfair. It’s unfair that this happened to you twice.” 

Oh. 

Robby looks at his hands. 

If Mr. LaRusso can say this so easily, why can’t my dad? 

“Yeah, yeah it’s not easy.” 

“I just wanted to remind you just incase you’ve forgotten, that you did really good. I’m really proud of you. You fought for Miyagi-Do, you made the dojo proud.” 

Robby feels the wind get knocked out of his chest and tears brim the surface of his eyes. “Thank you, Mr. LaRusso.”

He pats his shoulder again, rubbing his thumb against his shirt affectionately. “You were always my best student Robby, and I know you. I know you were probably feeling beat up about it, I just figured i’d remind you.” 

Robby smiles, a tear escaping. He nods, simply. Daniel notices but doesn't say anything in fear of overstepping.

“I wanted to check up sooner, cause Sam said you seemed down last time she saw you. I'm sorry I didn't.” 

Robby chuckles. “She has a sense for these things I guess.” 

Dad what do you know about Robby’s home life? 

I just wanted to say thank you. 

“Is that all that’s bothering you?”

Robby's eyes widen and opens his mouth to say something, but it’s interrupted by Johnny bursting into the room. 

“She’s here!” he announces cheerfully and out of breath. 

Miguel jumps up and practically runs at his Sensei. 

“Come on guys!” 

Everyone stands up and Robby reaches for his crutches. Daniel holds him out a hand and he takes it, surprised. He stays till Robby is situated and ready to crutch away. They walk together to Carmen’s hospital room. They immediately hear crying, crying from the baby girl, but when everyone walks in she seems to calm down somehow. 

Miguel rushes to his moms bedside with the biggest smile on his face, giving her a hug. Johnny is on the other side, clutching her hand and comforting her. Sam comes up behind Miguel, gasping at the sight of the baby and rubbing his back. Robby lingers back, not wanting to ruin their family moment. These are the moments where he feels like he doesn't fit into this family, there just isn't room for him. It's like there's a barrier around them and he's being pushed out.

Miguel stops and scans the room. He see’s Robby practically hiding behind Sensei Larusso. He reaches his hand out and grabs his brothers hand, pulling him closer.  

“Come here,” Miguel says, noticing that look in his eyes that he's gotten used to working around. “She’s just as much your family as she is mine.” 

Robby, surprised, blinks his wide eyes slowly. Miguel sees right through me. 

Carmen hands the baby girl to Miguel who holds the small human in between him and Robby. Robby looks down at the girl, a little girl with tanned skin and small, bright, blue eyes. His face softens and he smiles, tears coming to the surface. 

“She, she’s so beautiful,” Robby says, sniffling. Miguel then hands him the baby and he fully tenses up, but holds her. She's lighter than he expected. She reaches out and loosely grabs his shirt and he laughs. He notices Miguel wipe a tear from his eye, as he watches them and then puts his arm around Robby. 

“This is our sister man,” he whispers, as if it was just them in this room. 

“No one’s ever gonna be able to lay a finger on her,” Daniel laughs, watching the two karate-fighting boys with the fragile baby girl. 

Robby chuckles at that. He’s right, with Robby and Miguel as her brothers no one will touch a hair on her head. 

Robby reluctantly hands off the baby she she's passed around the room. Carmen watches her with heavy, tired eyes and a smile. Johnny is sitting next to her on the small bed and is the last one to hold her. Robby watches as he takes the small being wrapped in a light pink blanket into his arms and smiles, looking at her like she’s the most important thing in the world. He doesn't take his eyes off of her for a second. He holds her like she's going to break, yet he knows he'd do anything to protect and be there for her. 

Robby feels a new set of tears coming to his eyes and an overwhelming wash over him. The room suddenly feels small and the lights hurt his head even more then they did in the waiting room. Everyone's chatting, talking to Carmen about her experience and asking how she's feeling. He turns and leaves the room, his crutches clucking which should alert everyone in the room that he's leaving, but no one looks up. No one notices over the buzz of the birth. 

He sits back down in the now empty waiting room and the tears finally fall, hot against his cheeks. He covers his eyes, hoping no one walks out, he can't help it, they're flowing freely now. 

He thinks back to the stories his mom would tell him about his birth–or therefore lack of stories. 

Your deadbeat excuse of a father sat outside in the parking lot and never made it past the front door. 

I didn't even want him there anyway, he just would've made it worse.

He failed you on your first day in this world and has been doing it ever since, you know that right? Why do you even want to see him? 

The doctors were really nice and helped me through it, because I was alone. 

Giving birth hurts like a bitch, i’m never doing that shit again. I wished I had taken a shot or something before hand, it would've eased the pain.

Robby feels his hands start to shake and he takes them away from his eyes, the empty waiting room blurry with tears. 

He didn't expect to react like this, that’s for sure.

It’s all coming out, everything that's been so pent up. 

He covers his mouth to stop it from trembling and rests his face in his hands once more, letting more silent tears fall. 

Robby’s 10th Birthday 

“Happy birthday baby,” Shannon says, kissing her son on his forehead having just come out of her room. The boy id sitting at the kitchen counter, ready for some breakfast in his matching pajama set and messy hair. He has a bright smile on his face. 

“Thank you mommy. I’m 10! Double digits,” he giggles.

“That you are,” she says and starts to brew herself a cup of coffee form the Kurieg on the counter. She looks tired and most definitely hung over, she has that scratchy sound in her voice, but Robby tries not to think about it. Nothing will ruin today because she told him his dad is coming for dinner. “What do you want for breakfast baby? We have–” Shannon asks, opening a cupboard that usually carried their cereal. “Oh um…” 

Robby’s face falls slightly. “Do we have pancake batter?”

“No we don't honey.” 

“Eggs?”

She opens the fridge. “No, we're out of those too.” 

“Umm how about bread? For toast?” 

She opens the bread box and finds a loaf, but sighs when it has molded. “How about this baby, mommy’s going to take a shower and then take a quick trip to the store to get you some goodies. I’m sorry I should've had it ready for you, but i’ll make up for it. In the meantime, watch some TV.” 

Robby nods, smile still present. “Yeah, okay mom.” 

Later that night after watching cartoons all day and skipping school, Shannon takes Robby out for dinner and tells him that a special guest would be joining them. She had said that a few days ago, and he hasn't been able to stop thinking about it cause it had to be his dad, right? Who else would be that special?

They sat at a table, arriving before said guest. 

“Can I get you guys started with something to drink?” a waitress asks. 

Shannon looks at her son. 

“We’re still waiting on someone!” he says hopefully. 

“Okay hun, would you like anything in the meantime?”

“I’ll just take a martini, please,” Shannon says and hands the waitress the drink menu. 

Robby looks at the menu. “Water is fine for me…” 

The waitress comes back a few minutes later with their drinks. “Are you guys ready to place an order?” 

"I think so," Shannon sighs.

“No, my dad is still coming!” Robby almost cries, starting to lose hope. 

Shannon frowns. “Honey, we should put it in an order.” 

“Okay but can we order something for dad? He’d probably like the chicken fingers! Oh or a burger! I like that." 

Shannon sighs. “Of course.” 

After they order Shannon excuses herself to go use the ladies room and catches up with the waitress. “Hey, can you not put the burger in? I know he’s not gonna show up and I don’t want to pay for a third meal.” 

The waitress frowns. “Sure.” 

“Thanks.” 

Johnny didn't show up that night. Robby had laid out his favorite pajamas on the bed and saved some hot chocolate he would make them before they left for dinner. He also had in mind a movie he wanted to watch with him. He thought that one day, this one day, he’d be there. But he wasn't. 

Instead Shannon invited over the guy she was seeing, David, that night for cake. Robby didn't hate David, he wasn't mean to him. He actually got him a gift and has taken him to the skate park before–but Robby knew he wouldn't be around forever, no one ever was with his mom. 

After this birthday, he never expected Johnny to show up to another which is good, because he never did. He never got his hopes up.

At 12 years old, Robby got sick with mono and was out of school for a long time. There was a night early on in his sickness that his mom had a ‘business meeting’ which Robby knew just meant she was going somewhere out of town with a guy. Shannon did everything she could to get Johnny to come watch Robby for her. 

Robby hated that she had to try so hard. He hated that his dad didn't immediately care and want to see him when he was sick like this. He had heard her on the phone with him a few times that day, her voice was louder when she talked to him than it was with anyone else.

Shannon said goodbye and told him that Johnny should be there when he gets out of work, and Robby didn't know what to think about that. 

After a few hours of being alone and stuck on the couch, he hears a knock at the door. It’s almost 10:00 at night. He prys himself off the couch, feeling a chill go through him with the blanket gone. He opens the door to his father who's leaning against the wall and smells violently like alcohol. 

“Hey dad,” Robby says weakly, his nose stuffy. 

“Hey kid,” he manages, not able to look him in the eyes. 

“I’m probably going to bed soon,” Robby says and the two walk into the apartment. “So uh, do whatever you want I guess.” 

Johnny looks around the apartment, he hasn't been there in awhile. It looks nicer than it used to. Robby curls back up on the couch, covering himself with two blankets. 

“Do you uh–need anything?” Johnny asks, awkwardly standing in the middle of the kitchen. 

“No, I'm good. I don’t know why mom insisted on you being here when I can take care of myself,” he sighs. 

Johnny scoffs. “Can I get you some water or anything? Tea?” 

He shrugs. “No, we don't have any tea."

Robby watches as Johnny paces around the apartment awkwardly. He pours a glass of water, just trying to do something to feel more in place.  

“You can sit on the couch if you want. I’m just watching tv.” 

“Okay,” Johnny says and sits on the armchair in the living area across from Robby. 

The two sit in silence for a while as Robby watches a movie on tv. Every now and then he’d cough or something and Johnny would ask him if he needed anything. Despite everything, he was glad Johnny was there for some company but he’s not much of a person right now, just a drunken ghost. 

Robby fell asleep around midnight and Johnny not long after that. 

They didn't bond. They didn't catch up. Johnny didn't ask him. 

The next morning when Robby woke up his dad was gone. Like a ghost. 

A ghost is what Robby used to describe his father like all the time. He just floated in and out of his life and made himself invisible sometimes. Like when he had mono, he was there for a minute and gone the next. 

Growing up he had a lot of faith in his dad till that one birthday. After that, he didn't expect anything anymore, which is why he didn't expect him to show up when he was sick with mono.  

Younger Robby though was excited to get to know his father. He wanted to learn karate, he wanted to play soccer or really any kind of sport with him. He always made up stories about his dad to the other kids to make himself feel better, to paint his dad as a hero, but that all stopped after a while and he had to remind himself that those stories weren't true. That superhero version of his dad didn't exist.

Finally, after all the trouble he got into in his life without his fathers guidance, when his mom told him that Johnny came to her looking for him when he was 16 years old, he thought maybe he cared, that maybe things had changed. But, when he went to the dojo to try to see him and talk it out, he saw Johnny giving his gi to another kid and hugging him. 

And that was it. That was the true disappointment. 

He let himself get excited again, like he was when he was young, just to be crushed like he was on the day of his 10th birthday.

But since then, Johnny has tried at least, more than he ever did during the birthday and mono days. He wanted to make things better. 

And after a while, Robby got tired of blaming him for everything, but that didn't mean he didn't forget everything. Holding onto so much anger was exhausting, not to mention Cobra Kai was fueling said anger at the time. 

The Mexico trip was the first start and he had a great time, but wasn't entirely surprised when he found out it was for Miguel. It always felt like it was about Miguel. Even though his dad lied, at least he wanted Robby involved. Next, was the step of moving to live with his dad. It was nice, but he stayed in his room a lot so his dad din't have to chose between him and Miguel. Then, things got better with Miguel and he felt fairly happy, until the Sekai Takai. Until now.

It’s just all coming back. 

Robby still sits in the waiting room, tears streaming down his face, replaying all these memories. At this point he doesn't even know how long he’s been there until he feels a hand slide down his back. 

He jumps at the contact and is met with Miguel’s somber eyes. 

“Hey Rob,” he whispers, his voice low. 

“I’m sorry this is embarrassing,” Robby laughs, wiping his face with the sleeves of his sweatshirt. He quickly stands up and sniffles. “Let’s get back in the room and–” 

Miguel stands up, his hands on his shoulders. “I know it can't be easy.” 

Robby meets his eyes. “What?”

“Seeing Sensei being an actual father .” 

Robby’s surprised. “How--"

“When I first met you, one of the reasons I hated you was because you had the father I wanted, yet you pushed him away. I just didn't understand how you could do that and act so cold towards him,” Miguel admits. “After the accident, Sam told me that you didn’t have anyone else, that’s why you were living with them.”

“She did?” 

Miguel nods. “At the time I didn't want to hear it, but she made me realize that at least I had my mom and my Yaya and that you didn't...” 

Robby looks down, feeling the tears lingering on his eyelashes. “My mom was around more when I was younger, but at a certain age she was just out all the time. She gave up on me." 

“When I found you Sensei was your father, he told me about how he wasn't there for you in the hospital, and even though I hated you at the time I still actually felt bad. I guess I started to understand there, but I really did when I met my biological father.” 

Robby frowned. Miguel never talked about his experience in Mexico and Robby never asked, in fear of bringing up a sore subject. 

“You know, I actually saw myself in you when we found you in Mexico. I understood,” Robby admits. “I didn't like you at the time either but I felt for you.”

Miguel smiles. “I guess we both felt similarly but were too stubborn to admit it. I wish we did, that car ride home was torture.” 

“Yeah it was,” Robby laughs softly. 

“You should talk to Sensei. I’ll back off a little bit, I mean if that’ll help.” 

“No no, you shouldn't have to do that,” Robby brushes off. “I don't think its a good idea, he has his hands full.” 

“True… but I do think you should talk to him.” 

Robby shrugs. “I don’t know, right now he has to focus on the baby. This isn't about me.” 

“No, but he should recognize that it may bring stuff up for you.” 

“Miguel,” Robby laughs. “Even though my dad’s been trying and things have gotten better, he was never very good at knowing what i’m thinking, at knowing what to do.”

“I can talk to him.” 

“No please,” Robby says softly. 

“Robby I just walked out here to find you--I've never seen you cry. He needs to know,” Miguel says, seriously.  

“He needs to figure it out himself,” Robby says coldly. “Thanks Miguel.” 

Miguel nods, noticing his brother's shift in demeanor. “I’m here, okay?” 

Robby smiles. “Thanks Miguel.” 

“Wanna come with me?”

Robby nods and the two head back to the hospital room. 

Johnny was focused on his babygirl the rest of the day, and it was a long day. She was absolutely gorgeous and it killed him to leave that night. The LaRusso’s left earlier in the day and the boys hung back with Johnny until he was ready to go home–plus he’s their ride. Rosa decides to stay with Carmen for the night and the boys and Johnny got sent home. 

On the way home Johnny stops at In and Out and they all get food to bring back to the Diaz apartment. They all sit together at the table, talking a lot about nothing in particular. Johnny was beaming the whole time. 

Robby smiled a lot and Miguel kept watching him with cautious eyes. He doesn't say anything as he promised Robby he wouldn't, but he really wishes he could. Robby’s gotten good at faking his feelings over the years, despite the moment he had today. He's pretty embarrassed that Miguel saw him like that earlier, but is overall happy that he’s in his corner. 

Miguel noticed that Robby didn't really touch his food and was making it look like he was eating it. Miguel doesn't blame him though. 

“I’m gonna head back to the hospital in the morning,” Johnny tells the boys as he crumbles up his burger wrapper. “Do you guys wanna come?”

Miguel and Robby look at each other. 

“I think that I may have plans with Tory,” Robby says, looking down at his food. 

“Yeah I actually have plans with Sam too, but I'm sure that she’ll drive us to the hospital at some point,” Miguel says. “You and Tory are welcome to join us too.” 

“Thanks,” Robby says with a quick nod. 

That night, they all sit on the Diaz's couch to watch a movie. Robby could tell that Johnny and Miguel had watched the movie before, based on the way they reminisced and and told him how good it was. After awhile though, Robby feels himself getting tired from a lack of sleep the night before and the weight of his emotions. Before he could fall asleep though, he gets up and says goodnight, retreating over to his apartment, leaving Miguel and Johnny to it. 

Miguel looks at Johnny as soon as the door clicks shut.

Johnny narrows his eyebrows. “What? You two fighting again?”

Miguel sighs and looks back at the TV. “No. Nothing.” 

“What?” he asks more serious this time. 

Miguel shakes his head, biting on his fingernail. Johnny studies the boy and tries to understand what he’s thinking. 

“Did I do something?”

“No,” Miguel shakes his head and stands up. “But that's the problem I guess. I’m going to bed, I'm tired. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

Johnny squints and scratches his head. “Okay?”

“Night Sensei.” 

“Night kid,” Johnny says quietly before standing up and heading back to his place.

For some reason he’s nervous to open the door. It's been awhile since he's done this walk, since he's slept in his own bed--since he's stayed with Robby. 

He walks inside to a quiet apartment, so quiet he was afraid to move. He trudges to his room, a crash of exhaustion hitting him, but notices Robby’s across from his is open a crack. He usually stays out of Robby’s room for the sake of the kids' privacy, but he also usually never left the door open. Maybe he leaves it open cause he knows no one's usually here.

Johnny peeks his head in and it’s pitch black, but the light from the hall illuminates the boy asleep on the bed with his back towards him. Due to the creak of the door, Robby stirs and turns around, now facing Johnny, relaxing into a new position. 

Johnny’s heart falls and he walks closer. His son looks so innocent like this. He notices the bags under the boy's eyes as well as some red on his cheeks. 

Johnny thinks back to his son's behavior recently.

So distant. 

He facepalms and crouches down. 

“Did I do something?”

“No. That’s the problem.” 

Shit. 

“I’m sorry kid, this can’t be easy for you,” Johnny whispers and pushes some hair out of the boy's eye and his finger trails along his soft cheek. “We’ll have a real conversation tomorrow." If I can even manage to do that. “I really love you kid. I promise.”

Johnny swears in that moment he notices a tear forming at the corner of his closed eyelid, but nothing falls and the boy doesn't move, only continues breathing softly. His eyes move towards his awkwardly positioned leg and he feels a pang in his chest. 

Have we even talked about the tournament? 

Shit. 

“Goodnight Robby,” Johnny throws out one final whisper before sneaking out of the room. 

___

The next morning Robby hobbles into the kitchen, still in pajamas, rubbing his eyes. 

“Morning kid,” johnny says, standing by the stove moving eggs around in a pan.

Robby stops and narrows his eyebrows. “You’re cooking breakfast?”

“You sound surprised,” Johnny says. 

Robby shrugs and sits at the table, moving his crutches to lean against it. “No I just figured you would've been gone by now, I slept pretty late. I don't usually.” 

“Yesterday was a long day, I guess we all needed to sleep in a few hours.” 

Robby studies his dad. “How was the movie?”

Johnny shrugs. “We didn't finish it, Miguel decided to turn in not long after you left.” 

“Oh,” is all Robby says. 

“You must've been tired, when I got back you were knocked out.”

He checked in on me? Robby flushes in embarrassment. I shouldn't of left the door open. “Oh umm–yeah, hobbling around all day takes a lot out of me.” 

“I bet…” Johnny trails off. He grabs the pan and takes the eggs off the stove. At the same time, waffles pop out of the toaster over. He puts everything on a plate and puts it in front of Robby.

The boy looks up at him with wide eyes, confused. “No dad, I'm gonna make something. This is yours, you can have this.” 

“No I made it for you.” 

“You what?” Robby says too quickly.

“Of course I did,” Johnny says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

Robby swallows a lump in his throat and feels a slight burning in his nose, signaling rising tears. He looks at the plate then back up to his dad who's standing over him. “I just feel bad you don’t have to cater to me just because I live here now. You have a baby to deal with now, you should be with her,” he says, his voice crackling.

Johnny doesn't let himself think before blurting out his next words. “Why do you think I don’t care about you or something?”

Robby meets his eyes, surprised.

They stare at each other for a few moments, Robby's mouth agape, but no words come out.

He then looks down at his plate and pokes at the food. 

“What got nothing to say?” Johnny challenges. 

Robby shakes his head, staring at the food he's poking to keep himself from reacting. “No. Not really.” 

Johnny's stance deflated. He expected a fight, some anger, not such despair and disappointment.

“I just feel like you’ve been a bit distant lately and I just want to make sure you know that i’m still here for you.” 

Robby looks up at him, his eyebrows narrowing. “Did Miguel say something to you?”

Johnnys mouth falls open. 

“Did he?” Robby pries. 

“No. He didn’t say anything,” Johnny tells him, honestly. “He just got a little mad at me last night when I said something seemed off with you.” 

Robby looks at his hands. 

“I asked him if I did something,” Johnny continues. “He said no, that’s the problem. ”

Robby sighs. Miguel didn’t do anything wrong. “So is that why you’re here and not at the hospital right now? Because you want me to think you’re trying?” 

“There he is,” Johnny nearly laughs. There's the angry son he knew, yet still his words came out more as hurt than anything.   

Robby rolls his eyes and stands up. 

“Hey don’t go anywhere,” Johnny moves and stops him, not that he can move very fast. “I want to talk to you.” 

“I don’t want to talk right now.” 

Robby pushes past Johnny and heads towards his room.

Johnny rubs his face and lets him go. Maybe now isn't the time. 

He doesn't hear a peep from his son's room for the next hour, the hour he sat at the kitchen table tapping his fingers and trying to figure out what to do. He knows he should either be heading to the hospital or banging on Robby’s door, but he's just stuck. Both seem like the biggest challenges in the world, the biggest mountains to climb. He has to be a dad--a dad to two kids, 

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath and gets up. 

“Robby,” Johnny calls, banging on his door. 

He doesn’t answer. 

Johnny sighs. “Look, I should've realized sooner… I'm sorry with everything going on it’s hard to keep track of everything… but I'm trying, I swear. I haven't given up on us, I still care about working on our relationship. I just didn't realize how hard this was for you, but I get it. And I should’ve realized it sooner.”

“You’re doing good, dad, you do know that right?” Robby's small voice says from inside. 

Johnny straightens up and opens the door, taking him speaking as an invitation. He sees his son sitting on his head, back against the wall with his leg elevated on a pillow. His eyes look tired and there’s not an ounce of a smile on his face.  

“No, not really,” Johnny almost laughs. 

Robby sighs and looks at his hands. “You’re doing everything right dad. You held Carmen’s hand while she gave birth, tended to the baby, brought us all in to see… you talk about her, you want to see her, you want to make sure Carmen's okay, has company and has everything she needs,” Robby continues. Johnny frowns. “That baby is going to be so loved,” Robby smiles and nods confidently . “I mean she is already so loved, but I mean she’s going to have a great family, a father and mother that care about her and two brothers who would do anything for her–me and Miguel.” 

“I want her to,” Johnny says softly, unsure of why Robby’s smiling so wide. 

“ Good , me too,” he says, except Johnny can't see the tears pooling behind his smiling eyes. 

Johnny takes a step closer. 

“You’re being a good dad and doing everything right that you did wrong the first time,” Robby says, still smiling, except now a tear spills out. He looks down at his hands again to avoid eye contact. 

Johnny feels his heart shatter. He takes a few steps closer and kneels in front of his son's bed. “You know it’s been bringing up a lot for me too, I just didn't know how to bring it up...”

Robby looks at him now, not caring what tears slip out, but he doesn't give into the emotion and keeps a strong face. 

“It felt awkward… I don’t know,” Johnny shrugs. “Truth is I was terrified, terrified since the day Carmen told me she was pregnant. I didn't want to repeat any of my mistakes so I focused on the baby and did the best I could… but I didn't realize that I wasn't acknowledging my first ‘mistake’ at all, either.” 

Robby looks back down. 

“I’m sorry you lost the tournament, Robby.” 

Robby looks up at him, more tears falling out. “What?”

“I realized we hadn't talked about it after Miguel won. I just didn't know what to say to make you feel better without rubbing it on your face, so I said nothing and that was probably the worst choice.”

Robby stares at him, eyes bouncing back and forth, words not coming to him for few moments.

“It's alright dad,” Robby says softly. “I just thought that for once… for once I could change something. For once I could win. I’ve lost every tournament i’ve competed in… it’s just not in the cards for me.”

“You sound a lot like me,” Johnny says. "When I lost to LaRusso I though the world had ended--or well, I let that loss take over my world. I don't want this to destroy you like it destroyed me. Y ou kicked ass you there. I’m sure you would've won if Axel didn't fight dirty.” 

Robby lets it sink it. This is it, this is all he needed him to say then. “Yeah and I would've won if Eli didn't dislocate my shoulder and if I hadn't trained Kenny… there’s always an excuse,” Robby sighs. “I just lost. That’s it. There’s no reason or excuse for it.” 

"And I lost cause LaRusso used an illegal kick."

"Illegal?" Robby mocks.

Johnny rolls his eyes. “I’m proud of you, kid.” 

Robby's smirk drops. “You, you are?”

“I am. Despite what you may think,” Johnny moves closer and grabs his son’s hand with both of his own. “Watching what Axel did to you killed me. I was terrified of losing you in that fight, if i’m being honest,” 

“Losing me? What do you–” 

“After Kwon, I kept thinking about how it could've been you. It really could have. Kwon was your rival, and i’m sure if he saw you he would have gone after you with that knife,” he says slowly, trying to not get choked up. “I was tempted to tell you not to fight. LaRusso was too, but he said it was my decision. I knew you would want to fight, I wanted to give you that chance.” 

“I guess I didn’t think about it that way,” Robby admits. Johnny takes a deep breath. 

“Also, Axel was created by a monster, Sensei Wolf. After your first match I was scared of how he could hurt you. I guess at some point even though he broke your leg I was just glad you were alive.” 

Robby blinks away some tears. “I didn't realize you thought that.” 

Johnny nods. “I never want to lose you again, because if I do, I will never be the same. I don't want you to ever, ever think that I don’t love you, do you understand?”

Tears stream down Robby’s cheek. He nods. 

“I love you Robby. I’ve lost you so many times in my life, I wont lose you again because of this. Please, if I fuck up, talk to me. I’ll listen. I'll bring things up more. I just want to do better for you.” 

Robby smiles softly, blinking away tears. “You’re doing fine.” 

Johnny moves in and hugs the boy who melts into him, wetting his shirt with his tears. 

“I love you Robby,” he repeats.

Robby sniffles and relaxes further into his dads arms. “I love you too, dad.”