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Keiichi and Rena have been married for three years now. They've loved and supported one another in all that time, but they found an issue that love just could not conquer. Keiichi was a lawyer and he had just secured an excellent job. But it would require him to leave Hinamizawa. And Rena did not want that. They could not come to any agreement that satisfied them. But the two of them had a firm rule they would never break: No matter what, they would never hate each other.
It was late at night and they were still lying awake in their bed. They were looking up at the ceiling. Neither of them wanted to say it, but they both knew what they had to do. Keiichi was the first one to finally say it. "We should get a divorce." Rena bit her lip and gripped the bed sheets. She was upset, but she knew he was right.
"I still love you and you still love me. That will never change. But at this stage of our lives, it's better if we don't let our marriage keep either of us from being happy."
Keiichi turned to Rena and she turned to him. "I would never be happy knowing I forced you to leave the home you love." Rena smiled. "And I would never be happy if I forced you to give up on your dream job."
Keiichi turned to look back at the ceiling. "So I guess that settles it. We should take care of the paperwork immediately so we can take care of splitting finances, alimony, and such."
Rena bolted up with an excited shout. "I just thought of a great idea! Once we're divorced, you and Mii-chan should get married!!"
"What!?" Keiichi yelped.
"WHAT!?!" Mion shouted.
Rena looked at Mion who had been laying on in the same bed but on Keiichi's other side. "You're the next heir to the Sonozaki clan. You've got connections in Tokyo don't you?"
Mion scratched her cheek nervously. "Well, yes actually. I've traveled there several times as a representative and will likely travel more often once I'm the official head of the family."
Rena giggled excitedly. "So Keiichi living in Tokyo shouldn't be a problem for you. So we should switch roles! Going forward, you get to be Keiichi's wife, and I'll his mistress!"
Mion's face turned beet-red. "No, no! I can't! That's a level of intimacy this old man is not ready for!"
"Mii-chan... We're all naked in a bed together right now."
"S-so what? That doesn't mean anything."
"Mii-chan... You and Keiichi have already had a son together."
"But I'm just the mother of his child. That's different from being married."
"Mii-chan..."
Mion's face was so red that Keiichi and Rena expected steam to come out of her ears. "Alright fine!"
In an instant, Mion put on that confident face she makes when she assumes the role of leader. "Kei-chan, consider yourself fortunate. For Mion Sonozaki shall grant you the pleasure of being my husband."
Keiichi looked at Mion with a blank expression. "Okay then. Now that that's settled, I'm going to sleep."
***
The day of their divorce proceedings came. Everyone from Hinamizawa came to attend. In a small village like Hinamizawa, everyone knows everyone's business. The elders considered it scandalous enough that Keiichi was having an affair with the heiress to the Sonozaki clan. But now they were utterly appalled that he was leaving his wife to be with her and they wanted to see this scum be torn apart in court.
Or at least, that's what they said when asked. In truth, no one was bothered by what Keiichi was doing. He demonstrated that he was a loving husband and father. And Rena and Mion were the ones who set up the whole wife and mistress roles to begin with. When they first decided on it, Mion insisted on being the mistress and openly bragged about how her relation with Keiichi was lascivious.
Rena's lawyer was a cruel-looking man. His face was etched into a perpetual scowl and his eyes were narrow and focused. He had a gaze that sent shivers down one's spine as if they were prey that realized they were in the sight of a predator.
Keiichi opted to not hire a lawyer and would represent himself. He was already a lawyer after all. He figured there was no need to hire one.
The judge sat at the bench. He coughed to clear his throat and began the proceedings. "We are here to go over the divorce proceedings of Keiichi Maebara and Rena Maebara. The two of them have agreed to be here of their own volition. Would the legal council for Ms Rena Maebara please introduce themself."
Rena's lawyer bowed. "Thank you, your honor. My name is Senzen Oota. I will be representing my client Rena Maebara née Ryuugu."
The judge nodded. "Thank you. And I wish to confirm that Keiichi Maebara has chosen to forgo his right to an attorney and will represent himself. Is that correct?"
Keiichi was dressed in a wedding tuxedo. He bowed. "That is correct, your honor."
The judge nodded. "Very well. With that out of the way, let us begin with opening statements. Oota-san, please give your opening statements."
"Very well. I represent Rena Maebara née Ryuugu in this divorce case between her and her husband Keiichi Maebara. Both of them have expressed a desire to divorce each other due to personal conflicts about their chosen life and career paths. However!" Oota turned to Keiichi and pointed at him. Oota raised his voice. "It must also be stated that Keiichi Maebara has had a long-standing affair with another woman during the entirety of their marriage."
The crowd gasped.
"In fact, he's planning to marry his mistress once the divorce is over and then move to Tokyo with her."
A voice shouted in the crowd. "Yeah that's right!" It was Mion. She was wearing her wedding dress and carrying her flower bouquet. She had a big smile on her face. "We're getting married right after this so hurry up and get this done already!!"
The judge slammed his gavel. "Order in the court. Now I would ask Maebara-san to give his opening statement."
"Thank you. I am Keiichi Maebara. I will be representing myself in this case. As stated earlier, Rena and I both agreed to this divorce. But our divorce is purely amicable and I intend to ensure Rena continues to be supported by me even after."
The crowd gave a quiet applause.
The judge nodded. "Thank you both. Now the primary matter of concern is finances. Oota-san, please provide the records about the Maebara's financial earnings."
"If we look at their earnings, we can see a grave image of financial inequality. At the moment, Rena-san is self-employed running her own clothing store. While she has been earning enough to keep it running, she's dependent on Keiichi to keep it in business. If they divorce, she would be cut off from financial support and would soon go out of business. Therefore-"
"OBJECTION!!"
Keiichi stood up. "You are implying that my wife is not capable of running a business of her own! I'll have you know that she's a master business woman and has been the primary bread winner while I've attempted to secure a better paying job. And with this job we'll have enough money so Rena can relocate to a larger store in the middle of Okinomiya. She deserves financial compensation from me not because she can't survive without it, but because she can thrive with it!"
Rena looked at Oota angrily. "Oota-san. I do not want you insulting my husband or me like that again. We worked hard to get that store open, and we want to make sure it stays open."
The judge spoke up. "Let us continue. Oota-san, what does Rena-san want out of the divorce."
Oota composed himself. "Right. She seeks to have half of Maebara-san's earnings after personal expenses be given to her as alimony. She also wants the house they've been living in. However!"
Oota turned to Keiichi and pointed at him. "It is my opinion as Rena-san's lawyer to demand more than that because she recently discovered that she is pregnant with his child!"
The crowd gasped. Then they cheered.
Keiichi ran up to Rena and hugged her. "Why didn't you tell me sooner? I'm going to be a father? This is the happiest I've ever been."
"Don't be silly Keiichi-kun." Rena hugged him back. "You're already a father, remember? But I'm so glad we'll soon have our own child as well. I know you'll be just as much of a loving father to them as you've been with Keiichi Jr*."
Oota shouted "Your honor! Please order Maebara-san to refrain from interacting with my client!"
Rena shouted "OOTA-SAN!" Everyone got quiet. "What were you planning to use my pregnancy to accomplish? Were you planning on bad-mouthing Keiichi-kun and call him a terrible father for abandoning his pregnant wife?"
Oota looked panicked at Rena. "N-no. Nothing like that."
"Rena is sick of looking at you. As of this moment, you are no longer my lawyer. Leave at once."
Oota shivered and then ran out of the courtroom screaming "DAMMIT!!!"
The judge slammed his gavel. "Well this is an issue. Rena-san, by firing your lawyer, are you now saying you will represent yourself going forward?"
"Don't worry, your honor." Rena chuckled. "I already have a backup lawyer in mind. Someone who is sure to win this case for me."
The crowd murmured.
"I wish to have Keiichi Maebara act as my legal council for the remainder of this case!"
The crowd gasped. Keiichi smiled and said "I would be honored to represent you in this case!"
"Let me make sure I understand this," said the judge. "Maebara-san, you plan on representing both yourself and your opponent in this case. That is a grave conflict of interests and I cannot allow you to do that."
"OBJECTION!!!"
Keiichi was standing by Rena as her lawyer. "As of this moment, I also choose to fire my lawyer from continuing to represent me. And as I was my own representative, that means I am not representing Keiichi Maebara. I am representing only Rena Maebara née Ryuugu.
"AND FURTHER MORE!" Keiichi pointed to the empty desk he was previously sitting at. "I wish to point out that Rena's opponent in this case is not in court nor does he have any legal representative in this case either. Since Keiichi Maebara has chosen to not appear in this case, I request the judge give a default ruling on this case and award Rena everything including the house. And Keiichi Maebara should require to pay her alimony and child support to the maximum extent permitted by the law!"
The judge sat at his bench quietly and nodded. "I see no reason to argue with you. Henceforth, the court demands that Keiichi Maebara and Rena Ryuugu are now divorced. Rena will keep the house and Keiichi Maebara must pay the maximum possible in alimony and child support. And with that, this court is adjourned."
"OBJECTION!!"
It was Rena who said that. "We haven't discussed Keiichi-kun's visitation and custody rights over our child. Along with all the other rulings, I demand he have full visitation and shared custody rights. Our child will be free to visit whenever they want and Keiichi can be with us whenever he pleases."
Keiichi looked at Rena with loving passion. "Rena. Thank you. I'll be sure to be the best father for our child and love you as if you were my wife."
Rena looked at Keiichi with the same loving passion. "I know you'll be a wonderful father. And I'll be sure to be your loving mistress."
Keiichi and Rena hugged each other lovingly. The crowd stood up and gave a roaring applause.
Once the cheering died down, the judge spoke. "Right then, along with all previous results, Keiichi Maebara will have full visitation and shared custody as well. And with that, this case is adjourned." The judge slammed the gavel on his bench.
Mion stood up. "Alright everyone! Now that the divorce is over, it's time for the wedding! Places everyone!" The crowd scrambled to get to their chosen places. Oota came back into the room pushing a small organ and placing it at the side of the courtroom. The other attendees at the courthouse began decorating it with banners, streamers, and flowers. The judge went to a changing room and came out dressed in a reverend's outfit.
Once all the decorations were set, everyone took their place. At the center of the courtroom stood the Judge. To one side was Keiichi standing as the groom. And beside him was Rena. To the other side of the judge was 3-year-old Keiichi Jr.
Oota sat at the organ and began his performance signaling the bride's arrival and everyone stood up. Mion walked down the aisle, bouquet in hand. As she stepped, toward the center of the courtroom, her friends who were standing closest to the aisle showered her in flower petals. Once she reached the center of the room, she stood next to Keiichi and they locked eyes.
The judge spoke. "Everyone, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of Keiichi Maebara and Mion Sonozaki as husband and wife. Please present the rings." Rena took off her wedding ring and handed it to Keiichi. Mion turned to Keiichi Jr and asked him "May I have daddy's ring?" Keiichi Jr gave it to her and she gave him a quick hug as thanks.
"Now, please place the rings on each others fingers and hold hands as you exchange vows."
Keiichi placed his ring on Mion's finger and Mion placed hers on his. They held each others hands.
"Keiichi Maebara, do you take Mion Sonozaki to be your lawfully wedded wife to have and hold, love and cherish, till death or boredom with the arrangement do you part?" "I do."
"Mion Sonozaki, do you take Keiichi Maebara to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and hold, love and cherish, till death or boredom with the arrangement do you part?" "I do. But first!"
Mion stepped away from her spot and Rena took her place.
The judge continued. "We are also here to celebrate the union of Keiichi Maebara and Rena Ryuugu as paramours! With this, there's no need to exchange rings or vows but we might as well ask anyway. Keiichi, do you wish to make Rena Ryuugu your unlawfully, unwedded paramour?" "I do." "And Rena, do you wish to make Keiichi Maebara your unlawfully, unwedded paramour?" "I do."
"The n I now pronounce you two" the judge pointed at Keiichi and Mion "husband and wife. And I declare you two" he pointed at Rena and Keiichi "as paramours. You may all kiss each other!"
Keiichi kissed Mion and then Rena. Then Mion and Rena kissed each other. Everyone cheered.
Oota played them off as Keiichi locked arms with Mion on his right and Rena on his left and they walked down the aisle.
As they left, Rena giggled and asked "This was fun but was it really necessary Mi-chan? We took care of all the divorce filings a while ago, and you and Keiichi signed your marriage certificate 3 weeks ago."
Mion smiled and snickered. "Of course it was necessary. Everyone likes a good wedding, but everyone LOVES a good divorce. And who would I be if I passed on an opportunity to give a good performance? We should do this again in a few years."