Chapter Text
You saw the news reports on the winter soldier on TV and they made him a terrifying person to behold. He was a dangerous assassin that was on the run from the government and should be reported on sight.
They constantly replayed a highlight of his latest incident on a highway where he used an explosive weapon to blow up a few cars before fleeing. The sight of the masked man walking calming through the fire if the chaos he created sent chills down your spine. But after your co-worker Steve Rogers, yes that Steve Rogers, was given the same villain treatment on TV you began to question everything. It was why you were so open to his proposition when Steve approached you at home late one night.
He looked sad and desperate on your doorstep with tired puppy dog eyes staring at you. You invited him without a second thought and made a meal for him before sitting down. He seemed grateful for your assistance and you had a feeling it was the first real break he had for days.
“So. You've been on an adventure since the last time I saw you.” You attempted to joke. He smiled in response.
“Yeah. Guess you could say that.” The air went silent.
“Ok. Out with it. There's no good way to break bad news.” You leaned back in your chair, arms crossed to show you were not going to entertain any other topics of conversation until he said what was on his mind.
“SHIELD has been infiltrated by Hydra.” He explained. “I know you're just work a desk job there but just keep your head down ok.”
You rocketed forward from your chair, “What? How? Since when?”
He shrugged, “Since it was founded. They've been manipulating us since the beginning and I am working on exposing them.”
“Corruption at it's finest.” He was surprised that his words alone were enough to win you over, “Is there anything else I can do for you other than give you food and shelter for the night?”
“Actually. The Winter Soldier he's my best friend back from the war.”
“World War II? How?”
“He was captured by Hydra back then and put into cryo sleep. Only woken up when they need him to do their bidding as an assassin.”
“That sounds awful to be brainwashed like that. I can't imagine what that would feel like. I am so sorry.”
“I think you have a good way with words. If you talk to him and help him the way you're helping me–”
“You know it's ok to admit when you just need help Steve. You don't have to convince me up to do the right thing.”
He let out a breath he was holding and a heavy blush tinted his cheeks out of embarrassment from getting caught in a lie. “I am not saying to seek him out just....if he happens to cross your path call me not the police.”
You agreed to his terms not knowing you would be held to meet them just a week later after SHIELD was exposed and Steve himself went on the run.
You woke up to the sound of something large falling to the ground. You didn't want to leave the comfort of your bed, but knowing it was probably something important that got damaged coaxed you out. You figured the painting you hung on the hallway walls last week was not secure after all. So you stumbled into the hall and found nothing out of place. All you spotted was the light that shone through the partly opened bathroom door.
Weird. You were sure you turned it off after brushing your teeth. Still, trying to stay in a sleepy state, you slowly approached the door and opened it to find a man dressed in tactical gear raiding your medicine cabinet.
Thankfully you always kept your phone on you and dialed Steve's burner phone before slipping your own in your back pocket.
“It's Bucky. Right?” You weren't sure if it was better or worse to know his name. But you did know that you needed to stall until Steve arrived.
He glared at you with anger in his eyes, but you spotted the blood seeping through his fingers as he held them against his side. He was seriously injured and desperate for help.
You slowly approached him with your arms raised in the air. His hands were too slick with blood to open the latches on the med kit you had stashed away. Sensing you did not mean him harm, he retreated away from you to allow you to help without letting his eyes off you. It reminded you of a wild animal that was corned and desperate for help. Maybe that's what he was in this moment.
You wiped the blood off with some toilet paper and popped the latches opened. It was a more substantial emergency kit including those stick on sutures. With how often New York was under attack you never wanted to be caught off guard.
He greedily snatched the supplies and turned to face away from you as he attempted to tend his wounds. He rolled up his shirt until it reached his ribs and pinned it down.
His hands worked with a level of speed and efficiency that told you he had done this many times before. It took him about ten minutes to finish the whole process and you were back to stalling. To your surprise he began to clean up the mess he made.
“You know Steve told me about you. He said you're a good person.” He snapped towards you with such speed it sent a chill down your spine.
“I--I mean you're not under their control anymore.” Them, you talked about Hydra as if it was nothing yet you refused to say their name.
“I am not the same person he knew back then.” His voice was rough and gravely as if he was getting use to using it.
You bent down to help gather some of the discarded gauze he was cleaning up when your phone fell out of your back pocket and clattered against the tile floor. Steve's face was clearly shown on the screen. It was a cropped group photo you took with him from the last corporate party that you assigned as his profile picture. Your blood ran cold.
His face hardened as he glared back up at you.
“He just wants to help.” You tried to explain but he just scoffed at you.
“Is that what he told you? That I need help?”
“ You're hurt. Lost.”
“Don't pretend like you know me.” He warned. “Now get out of my way before I make you.”
You stood defiantly in the doorway refusing to let him leave.
“You really think you can stop me?” He lowered his voice to try and intimidate you but it did not work.
“No.” You answered honestly despite your obvious fear. He clenched his fist, frustrated by your stubbornness. “See. You haven't hurt me even though I gave you a reason to. You're good.”
“ That's not true.” He snapped at the accusation. “I could easily hurt you if I wanted to.”
“But you won't.”
“You sure about that?” You nodded in response, your convictions strong. He let out a sigh. “You're really not going to let me leave are you?” You shook your head.
Just as Bucky decided to give up on convincing you and push you aside, he heard a familiar set of footsteps approach him. His gaze darted towards the front door of the apartment where Steve now stood.
"Damnit, Rogers" he mumbled under his breath. As if he just made the decision, Bucky quickly spun you around and held you against his chest. He used one arm to pin yours to your side and held a gun on you with the other. You knew it was an empty threat.
“You don't want to do this Buck. This isn't you.” Steve tried his best to talk his friend down but he only tightened his grip on you as he felt threatened.
“Back off Steve.” He slowly backed you out of the room and into the hallway in search of a quick exit. His eyes landed on the window at the end of the hall. There was a rooftop just across the way the fall wasn't too bad. He knew he could make that jump.
Steve followed his gaze and let out a tired sigh. He knew him long enough to know where this is going. His voice sounded tired like him pulling stunts like this was a common inconvenience. “Buck. Don't do anything stupid.” He stepped forward halfway through his sentence as Bucky made his move. Steve reached out to grab him, but he was not fast enough.
“Hold onto me.” It was the only warning you got and Bucky turned you around and pulled you into his chest. He jutted out his metal arm to make sure it was the first thing to make contact with the glass instead of you. The window shattered all around you and you buried your face further into his chest to hide. You squeezed your eyes shut as you felt your stomach drop, the wind rushing around you until you landed.
He ran until he found an abandoned building to lay low in. It was an old warehouse. He easily broke the lock with his metal arm and pulled you inside. You were inside some old storage unit.
He releases you once you were inside. He was on high alert, stuck in his head as he tried to form a plan and a hard look of concentration masked his face.
You happily sat on the floor and watched him go through his routine. Your eyes followed him from one end to the other and back again. Once he was satisfied and deemed the place to be secure, he returned to you.
He looked down at you with a confused expression. “You could have ran.”
“Like I said before. You wouldn't hurt me.”
Bucky clenched his jaw. He was annoyed by you. He didn't like being seen through like that. He liked being the unpredictable one, the one people couldn't get a handle on. But some how you managed to call his bluff.
"Don't be so sure" he grumbled, his tone was defensive as he tried to convince you that he was dangerous.
"I am not scared of you. I know you won't hurt me. You're not the monster you think you are."
He scoffed, a small smirk forming on his face
"I know it wasn't your fault. I know I can give you an opportunity to prove yourself.
"Why would you help me?"
"You don't know anything about me. You don't know the things I've done, the horrors I've committed. I'm a monster."
He seemed desperate for you to understand though he tried to hide it. It was as if he wanted you to truly see him for who he was. You had to see him as nothing more than a deadly assassin for your own safety. And part of him wanted you to challenge him. To prove him wrong.
“You can still make up for your past.” He laughed bitterly at your niave response.
"You think it's that easy? You think I can make up for all the things I've done? You think I can just wash my sins away and start over?"
You reached out to try to hold his hand and calm him down. His body tensed up as you reached out to him. He was skittish, like a wild animal that wasn't used to being touched. You wondered if he was even use to receiving a gentle touch.
"It's ok. Just stay here with me." He wanted to believe your words, he really did. But he was struggling with the guilt and shame of his past, the fear that he was beyond redemption and that he was destined to be alone forever.
"You don't understand. I'm a danger to everyone around me. I'm a weapon, a killing machine. It's better for everyone if I just run and keep running. I can't let myself get close to anyone, I'll just end up hurting them."
“I bet if you let me get to know you I could prove the type of person you really are. So what do you say? You could stay with me for a while under your own terms. Steve could visit without feeling the need to keep you under lock and key. You'd be save from Hydra and the government. No more running.”
He was silent for a moment as he pondered your offer, torn between his want to believe you and his fear of trusting again. "You really think I can just stay with you, no strings attached? No hidden agenda, no hidden motives? No tricks?"
“Yes.” Your response was firm and confident.
"Why would you help me?" He couldn't believe there wouldn't be a catch.
"You seem to need a break." You answered honestly. "You can't tell me there isn't something in you that doesn't want to lay low and take things easy. Just for a little bit."
"When's the last time you slept without having to keep an eye open? Or had a real shower."
"I am doing fine without that. I don't need it."
"You don't need basic human care?" You joked.
You watched his face hardened as he thought over your offer. He weighed the pros and cons in his head.
"How am I supposed to trust you when I barely even know you? How am I supposed to trust you when I don't know your motives, your history, your intentions?"
“Steve trust me and it's not like I could stop you from leaving. If you try living with me and find it's not for you. I won't stop you from going on the run again. I am not trying to trap you Bucky. I am just trying to give you a peaceful solution.”
He let out a sigh, his face settling as he made his decision. "I...I'll give you a chance. But I'm putting down some ground rules here. No one else can find out I'm here, not even Steve. Understand?"
“Understood.”