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“Are you off?” “..Yeah, yeah. For now.” Cecil looked away. “You on again tomorrow?” “..In a few hours. If I come back.” Cecil mumbled. Lain blinked. “If you come back?” It was close to midnight. The night sky, usually so full of sparkling stars, was now muddled with grey clouds, the pavement and bench uncomfortably wet after the multiple showers that passed through throughout the day. Cecil’s face, unusually pale, shined from the reflection of the large illuminated EMERGENCY sign.
“I don’t think I was made for all of this.” Cecil finally cracked, his elbows planted on his knees, his hands gripped at his hair. His head was ducked low. Lain straightened, a wave of discomfort washing over him. Where did all of this come from? “The.. the long hours?” He guessed. Cecil was quiet. “..All of it.” His voice was weak, wobbly. Not the light, animated one Lain was used to hearing. “I- I don’t even know why I thought I could do this- being a doctor..” Lain went to speak, but found himself unable to articulate what he was trying to say, so he let Cecil continue.
“I couldn't… All I did was stand there and hold the damn tube. I could’ve done something more! And then the kid stopped breathing and I- Jensen made me call the parents! And I just… I couldn’t handle it. I mean- what kinda intern can't do something as simple as contact a patient's family? We lose them all the time.. I shouldn’t be this torn up about it.” For a few beats, Lain is frozen. Cecil hadn’t opened up like this in.. awhile. Since he started his internship, he’d been a bit preoccupied, but now, the words flowed from him, vulnerable and unguarded.
“It… isn’t your fault.” He finally said. His hand found Cecil’s shoulder, and he couldn't help but notice how it flinched slightly under his touch. Maybe he should pull away. Cecil sniffled, looking up at the sign. The area around his eyes was now flushed red, his eyelashes clumped together by tears. Lain couldn't help but notice how much his eyes stood out against the faint pink of his sclera's.
“I know.” He said. “..Does it get easier? Dealing with their loss?” “Kinda.” Lain offered. His hand wrapped around Cecil’s shoulder, pulling the brunet into him. Cecil’s head landed softly on his shoulder, before migrating under Lain’s chin. Cecil was content in the silence, but Lain was practically begging for it to be interrupted. “But.. tomorrow is a new day. You’re- you’re probably tired. I'm sure after a few hours of sleep, you’ll be ready to get back at it.”
Cecil, easily convinced, nodded. “Yeah, I hope so…” Lain’s hand patted his shoulder, before he pulled away. Cecil collected himself, before getting up and stretching slightly. “..I should head home.. Enjoy my rest while I still can.” “Yeah..” Lain said softly, taking the sight in. He nodded. “Yeah, you go do that. See you tomorrow.”