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The potion of strength had been given to Karlach, after a short debate and a game of arm wrestling between her and Lae’zel, it had been decided she needed it more. With the potion and the newest upgrade of her engine, she had been beaming all day, hugging everyone at the Last Light Inn, whether they liked it or not.
Thanks to them, the tieflings had been safely returned to the inn, with the addition of some deep gnomes, and their latest victory had led Jaheira to consider giving them one room. Which was currently occupied by Karlach and Shadowheart, who had decided to indulge in Karlach’s new ability to touch people.
And since the tiefling was still running terribly hot, the window to their room was open, letting the whole camp know exactly just how much the two of them enjoyed themselves.
Axael groaned into his pillow after ten minutes of screaming, and seriously considered using a silence spell to shut them up after fifteen.
Eventually, he got up, threw his shirt back on, took his violin and left his tent after placing a gentle kiss on his sleeping lover’s curls. The fresh air of the night was a wonder to his tired mind. He hadn’t slept in two days, and his sleep had been in general sparse ever since they had set foot in the cursed lands.
But every morning, he faked waking up next to Astarion when the latter opened his eyes, to make sure he wouldn’t worry him when he had spent the night awake. But the girls having sex right next to him with the window open was just too much for this night, and so, he decided to take a walk around the campsite.
He opened the little metallic box in his breast pocket. Only five cigarettes left. Maybe he could trade something for some more? The prices were insanely expensive in here, and he only smoked when under extreme stress...Maybe he could manage until Baldur’s Gate.
For now, the situation could be considered an “extreme stress” one, with the pressure of the Absolute looming over them, the shadow curse they needed to lift, his relationship with Astarion and his own sleepless nights.
He lit his cigarette and started walking, greeting the few awake people he crossed on his way, and petting Scratch and the owlbear cub when he found them. The fresh air of the night felt amazing, so was the company of his furry friends, giving him some respite from his troubled thoughts.
After a short walk around the inn, and with his head clearer, Axael returned to the camp, only to be met with Astarion.
“Hey, you should be sleeping…” the bard said quietly as he approached his lover.
“So should you.” The vampire retorted. “Can we talk? About the two of us?” he asked, almost shyly.
Axael nodded, feeling his heart skipping a beat. Did he do something wrong? Was Astarion mad at him? It was hard to pick up on his physical cues, since his breathing and other indicators were so irregular compared to most mortals.
“What is going on?” Axael asked, uncertain. “Are you alright?” Are we alright? He wanted to ask.
“Yes, I’m alright, I just feel, well...Awful”
Axael gently approached him, blindly reaching for his hands in a silent show of support.
“Did…” the bard hesitated. “Did I make you feel like that?”
Astarion scoffed, squeezing Axael’s hands back. “No, you didn’t...Well, maybe you did, but not in a bad way.”
What in the hells is that supposed to mean? Axael tensed, expecting the worse.
“I’ve seen the way you looked at that blood witch when she insinuated I was your property.” The vampire pulled Axael a bit closer. “No one had ever stood up for me like that before.” he said in a whisper, “You’re incredible.”
“I didn’t do anything…” he protested.
“You’ve listened to me, you’ve protected me at your own risk, you...You cared for me like no one else ever had. Look, I used to have a plan, a nice, simple plan: seduce you, sleep with you, manipulate your feelings so that you’d never turn on me, and all I had to do was not fall for you. You derailed that plan from day one, because you so genuinely care.”
Astarion cupped Axael’s cheek with his hand, and the tiefling leaned into the touch, closing his eyes and savoring the contact. Despite the coldness of his skin, the gentleness of the act sparked heat into his cheek.
“I do care for you. Deeply.” He said softly before turning his head and kissing his palm.
“I know, and I’m scared of not being enough for you. I’m a wretched thing, Axael, a slave who spent most of the last two centuries on his back for strangers.” He spat. “You deserve someone who makes you happy.”
With but a split second of hesitation, Axael gently slid his arms around Astarion’s waist.
“You make me happy, Astarion.” He murmured. “With your witty retorts and your cynicism, and even your flaws. Again, I care for you, all of you.”
He felt hesitant arms encircle him as well, and something wet on his shoulder when Astarion placed his head here. He moved his hand into Astarion’s hair, gently combing through the soft curls.
“If you’re still worried about that sex thing, I told you, I don’t mind if we don’t have sex, it’s not important.” Axael assured him. “Hells, I’ll wait centuries for that if it means having you close to me.”
“Why, that almost sounds like a challenge.” Astarion smirked. “Just how many centuries would you wait? What if I don’t want to have sex ever again?”
“Then we won’t have sex at all. Simple as that.”
He felt Astarion relax against him at the words, clearly relieved.
“I still can’t believe you’re here with me, you’re a dream come true.”
A dream come true. Astarion could hardly be closer from the truth.
“Do you remember Gandrel?” the rogue asked suddenly.
“The Gur who tried to take you? Yes, I remember.”
“You don’t like killing people, or seeing others do it, so why did you let me kill him?”
Axael winced. He fucking hated killing people, especially if they had done nothing to deserve it, but sometimes, situations were dire. It hadn’t really been the case for Gandrel, he could have talked their way out of it. He really wanted to blame the tadpole for the bad influence, but he knew it was him who had taken the decision to let Astarion do as he pleased.
“I was scared there would be more monster hunters, and when I understood he was from Baldur’s Gate, I got scared for my own hide.” He admitted.
“You thought he was going to bring you back too…” Astarion stated in disbelief, “Back to Carnna?”
“Back to Carnna. I got so scared, I just sort of...Froze and panicked and let you do your stuff.”
“Hm, I can tell you almost made a repeat performance last time, with Araj.”
Axael winced again.
“I’m pretty sure this place brings out the worse in people...The way she talked about you, I couldn’t let it pass.”
“You looked like you were going to eviscerate her.” Astarion laughed, pulling his head away from Axael’s shoulder. “I like it when you get all dark like this. You should indulge in that side of you more often, it suits you.”
“Get ready to see a lot worse then, because I’m at my fucking limit with this never ending quest for salvation.”