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Ruri looked out of the bus window and watched as Meckel proceeded to gesticulate wildly towards the aquarium worker. From her patented "Meckel-Rest of the world" translating manual, she gleaned that the problem was of the parking variety. She watched as Meckel pointed at himself, the bus, the parking lot and then at the worker in a decisively accusatory manner. "Shouldn't you go down there to help?" Ruri asked, watching as the worker answered with a gesture as much as accusatory as the mechanic. "Not really, they're figuring themselves out" answered Edmundo, throwing a glance at the two men, who were now gesticulating at the sky with hands resembling crab claws.
Footsteps approached, then the worried face of Ryuken appeared in the in between the front seats.
"Coach, Owner, what is happening?" he asked.
"They're cussing out the government" Edmundo answered flatly, while the two men showed the palms of their hands in a pacifying manner.
Ruri frowned.
"How can you be so sure?"
"Star, you've been here for three days. I was born here”
Ruri harrumphed and slumped back into her seat, crossing her arms. Sure, her uncle might have been born and raised Italian, but that didn’t mean he could telepathically speak with other people or scry their recondite messages through hand gestures alone!
God, Italy sucked.
It all started with a phone call. They were in the middle of practice, and Ruri was trying to mediate a three way argument between GZ, Juurouta and Bull Armor if the action done was foul or not, so she didn’t notice her uncle’s frown at the phone’s screen, nor the long conversation following it, nor he grabbing Meckel and slipping away to discuss in hushed tones.
So the news that grandma Michelina died hit the diamond like a lightning strike, and the news that they were all travelling to Italy for the funeral was the consequent thunder.
“Right now??? But we’re in the middle of the sport year!” she exclaimed.
“I know” said Edmundo, raking a hand on his face.
“But also, we’re in a dead zone between events, and we’re doing mostly advertisement work now, and it's going to be for four days top”
And that was it.
The team was informed, for the delight of the leaguers, and the bags were packed. They piled in Magnum Ace’ spaceship and left, for a distant land of sunny sides and touchy relatives.
She barely remembered them, and definitely lost count of all Mario, Vittorias, Domenicos and Marias she saw that day, all asking the same questions: “How’s school?” “How is your father’s team?” “Where’s your boyfriend?”. The funeral was long and somber, and even longer was the lunch after. She was shoved at the kids’ table, where her peers didn’t speak a lick of her language and soon disregarded her.
So Edmundo, being the best uncle ever (she checked), decided to treat them all to a trip at the aquarium. A couple of phone calls later, they were now stuck at the entrance of the aquarium, where apparently a bus could not park.
“We can’t stop here” announced Meckel climbing back in.
“The maximum weight is fifty tonnes, and the bus plus the leaguers exceeds it”
“But the leaguers are going to disembark” said Ruri.
“That’s what I was saying!” shrugged Meckel.
Edmundo arched his eyebrows at her in a “I-told-you-so” manner and put the pullman in reverse.
“Ok, let’s go find a parking spot”
The good thing about off season visiting is that there is no one around.
The bad thing about about off season visiting is that there is no one around.
“There’s not a dog in the street!” commented Topjoy.
“ ‘Joy, what does that even mean” lamented Mach Windy.
“It means, sky at little sheep, rain in vats!” the pink Leaguer continued, wagging a finger on the soccer player’s face.
He twirled on the promenade.
“And I’ll do you one better! It rains. Government thief! Right Bull?”
Bull grumbled something that could be interpreted as affirming. The poor bot, bless his spark, was going through something experts defined as “a classic case of the jet lag”. He has been groggily deambulating all day, giving monosyllabic answers to his teammates’ prodding about his wellbeing.
“Now you’re just repeating nonsense” chided Edmundo. Topjoy grinned and skipped along, rattling off all of the other Italian slang he picked up on the way.
“It is exciting, isn’t it?” asked Ryuken. Magnum Ace nodded.
“It is. I have never been in such a facility. What do you think, GZ?”
The old leaguer harrumphed.
“We have all seen water and fish. Me personally, I don’t get the point of this trip”
Magnum Ace nodded again and waited a bit.
“Yes, but what are you hoping to see?”
GZ blinked and faced towards the sun.
“I want to see birds”
The aquarium came back into view. The main hall stood in the middle of the yard, that hosted a small pond and some picnic tables. The road, covered in tiles, brought to the entrance, decked in banners that proudly announced that the Cattolica Aquarium was “home to five hundred different species!”.
A stocky man descended the stairs.
“Salve! Benvenuti!” he yelled. “It’s such a pleasure to have you here!” he added in Japanese. “As it is for us to be here. Thank you for opening for us” said Edmundo. “Are you kidding me? An international Iron Leaguer team wants to see my aquarium? This is the dream! I need to have a picture of you in front of the sharks later!” the man laughed.
“There’s SHARKS?” yelled Topjoy.
“Oh yes! Many of them! Come, come!”
GZ stared at the animal in front of him.
The penguin stared back.
The first chamber of the aquarium was to greet guests, and what a greeting it was: the room hosted a giant amphibious aquarium, with a water tank and a rock platform for little chinstrap penguins to get dry on and do other important penguin activities, such as preening and honking.
“They’re fun little buggers! We’ve been training them to step on a scale whenever we feed them, so to monitor their weight more efficiently” explained Luca, their welcome party and feeder for that day, dangling a dead sardine above a rubber square. A penguin bravely approached, while being closely monitored by his compatriots, and hopped on the scale. Luca left the fish and the bird gobbled it up, waddling away contently.
After seeing that their brave leader wasn’t mauled to death by the same scale they saw everyday the penguin swarmed Luca, loudly demanding their meal.
“They’re very wary of strangers, so we try to rotate the people giving them fish. Once, Laura got a haircut and they refused to eat for a week straight, it was hell” the man commented. He got up and dusted his pants.
“And now the fun”
He pointed at the water.
“To give them exercise and keep the hunting instinct alive we throw the fish for them to catch. Does anyone want to try?”
He raised his bucket high, for all the leaguers to see.
“Magnum is the best pitcher, he should go!” said Mach Windy.
“What? No! Absolutely no 44 Sonic inside!” yelled Ruri.
“Ryuken then? He’s a mediocre pitcher”
“I’ll show you mediocre!”
“I’ll do it”
GZ stepped forth and extended his hand, with the composure and solemnity of a sea captain asking for a gun to shoot his second in command, guilty of mutiny.
Luca raised his eyebrows but didn’t object, and the leaguer scattered a handful of fish in a glistening arc. The penguins didn’t waste a second and darted to the water, showing everyone exactly what millions of years of evolution devolved towards water adaptation can do.
Topjoy clapped and squealed with, well, joy, and everyone cheered.
GZ repeated the motion, entranced in the movement, and watched as a penguin masterfully hopped out of the water and landed on solid ground, catching the fish.
“Very good! My, another robot coming for my job!” joked Luca, raising his hand to get his bucket back.
GZ clutched it near to his chest.
“I want to feed the birds again”
“Sorry buddy, they’re all done for today. But there are ducks outside!” Luca supplied helpfully.
The leaguer nodded sagely, and gave the bucket back to the aquarium worker.
“Here we have our rainforest habitat!” Laura said with a sweep of her arm.
The building they were in was bathed in low light, with a high temperature and humidity. Vines and other creeping plants plants hanged form the ceiling and walls, to give it a even more secluded aura. The room housed two big tanks, one mimicking a river bank, with water and various floating debris to keep their inhabitants occupied, while the other mimicked a jungle setting, albeit with a small pool at the end of a creek.
“Yeah, we rescued the caimans from a guy that kept them in his car, isn’t that crazy?” Laura laughed, showing off her laugh lines.
“In his car?!” echoed Ruri. She pressed her face up to the glass and peered at the reptile inside, who was basking near his comrade, happy as a peach. The third specimen swam with lazy movement of his tail, wading through the pirañas that also populated the glasshouse.
Ruri furrowed her brows.
“Isn’t it dangerous for the animals to be living in such close proximity?” she asked, eyeing their tiny jaws. “Oh no, they’re totally safe. We feed them plenty” Laura assured.
“And the otters? How often do you feed them?” asked Edmundo pointing at the other tank with his chin. In there, three river otters were staring, bewildered, at an equally bewildered Ryuken.
“They’re the weirdest animal that I’ve ever seen” he proclaimed.
Bull Armor, that was slumped on the glass near his friend, murmured some words in affirmation.
He was tired, and the low light and high humidity of that place weren’t doing him any good.
His realm for a nap, please!
“We feed them enough too. The problem with those three is that they’re basically the triplets from Ducktales, always causing trouble” Laura explained while checking her phone.
“Actually, we’re going to enrich them soon with a flash flood! Do you want to see?” she asked.
Her guests, obviously, eagerly accepted.
The lights got low and a rumbling sound pervaded the air, coming from hidden speakers in the lush foliage. The otter tank suddenly came to life, with a flash of light and misters springing into action. The creek started to fill with water, and the little mustelids started squeaking and running all over the place. Laura frowned and walked some steps aside, trying to understand what her interlocutor at the other end of the phone was trying to tell her.
Before we continue, a small science class is in order, to better understand the next happestances that are going to befall our beloved Silver Castle.
First lesson: when a Leaguer is overclocked, their body overheats. Many processes are running in parallel, the RAM is full of obsolete files, and the turbines are under physical stress. So, for example, if a Leaguer is jet lagged, their armor can reach temperatures whose heights cannot be safely ignored.
Second lesson: the european otter (Lutra lutra, Linneus, 1758) is a mustelid whose habitat range covers much of Europe, Northen Asia and even some territories in the middle east. While they can survive a wide range of temperatures, the Cattolica Aquarium supplied them with a toasty 15°C water.
Third lesson: the Cattolica aquarium utilizes glass panes as walls of their enclosures, and glass is an amorph substance that, when subjected to changes in temperature, can shrink or enlarge in a way that can lead to shattering very easily.
Thus, when the flash flood hit the glass where Bull Armor was resting on, it exploded in a million of little pieces.
The leaguer fell back with a yelp, and the water rushed out. The floor soon was flooded with murky water, mud and algae.
“What happened?!”
“I don’t know!”
“Bull Armor fell!”
“Oh my god!”
“We have to stop the water!”
“GZ freeze it!”
“Where is he?!”
GZ raised his hand. The ducks, diligently, followed the elegant arch of the leaguer’s movement and swarmed the piece of sandwich that the hockey player pilfered from the lunch packages in the bus. GZ ripped off another piece from the bread and threw it towards a second group of ducks, who were clamoring and quacking to get his attention. The birds appreciatively gobbled it up.
GZ folded his hands over his belly and leaned back on the bench of the picnic table.
All was well, and all was good.
Edmundo stared, dismayed, at the murky mess at his feet, while Ruri profusely apologized to Laura.
“We’ll repay for it! In full! And for the psychologists needed for the trauma caused to the otters!” she rambled, gesticulating wildly. Ryuuken, that was helping Bull Armor drying off with a towel, knitted his brows together and widened his eyes.
The otters.
They weren’t in the enclosure anymore.
He turned to Juurota and mimed with his mouth the otters escaped. The other leaguer stiffened and relayed the message to Mach Windy, who managed to keep a straight face only thanks to many years of PR training from Dark Prince.
“We have to leave!” he exclaimed, tugging along his teammates.
What are you doing mimed Magnum Ace.
Stall them mimed back Mach Windy.
“Magnum? What’s happening?”
The leaguer whipped his head towards Ruri and did the only thing a good team captain could do in this situation.
“They were summoned-“ he joined the tips of his fingers together “-by the Bowling Twins”
The five remaining leaguers huddled together in the corridor leading to the main entrance. “We’re gonna get scrapped for sure this time!” yelled Top Joy clawing at his cheeks. “No we’re not, Ruri wouldn’t let that happen” said Bull Armor, softly prying the hands of his friend away and intertwining their fingers together. He knew, from his experience at the hospital, how to balance the extreme catastrophism that Topjoy displayed whenever something wouldn’t go one hundred percent right.
Not that he wasn’t panicking. He was just better at hiding it.
An inward catastrophist, if you will.
“We have to get the otters back in their enclosure” announced Mach Windy.
“What? Are you crazy? How are we supposed to do that?!” shouted Topjoy throwing his, and consequentially Bull’s, hands in the air. Mach Windy made a face and fidgeted with his ponytail.
“Well what else do you suggest!”
“We could retire to the mountains” said Juurota.
“You can’t go back to the mountains every time something goes wrong, Juu” sighed Ryuken.
“Yes we can. There is a cozy spot up there that can fit all of us-“
Mach Windy threw his arms out in an imperative gesture for silence.
“Enough! We are Silver Castle! We cannot let this obstacle stop us! We climbed the ranks and defeated Dark Prince! Remember! What would Magnum Ace do?”
The team gathered their thoughts in silence and thought at what their fearless leader would do in that situation.
Find the otters. Have an emotionally charged sport duel where they denounced their problems and woes. Then teach them sportsmanlike behavior and how to catch a curve ball, probably.
“We have to find the otters” repeated Mach Windy. The others murmured their assent.
“The aquarium has a main entrance. If they pass from there, we’re done for. I’ll patrol it while you guys go get them” the leaguer said.
“Oh! Me and Bull can go to the sharks tank!” Topjoy exclaimed. “Wha- Why us?” asked Bull Armor, suppressing a yawn. The charge in his circuits approximatively comparable to an adrenalinic surge was waning, and this his urgent need for a nap was making itself known once again. “Because I can see in the dark, and you’ll do better in a calm and lowly lit environment!” the other replied.
“I’m fine”
“No you’re not”
“I am”
“How much is 15+18?”
“36”
Bull Armor knitted his brows together. No, that wasn’t right.
“Ok, fine” he grumbled
Topjoy illuminated him with a megawatt smile. “Then me and Juurota will go to the reptilarium” said Ryuken with a solemn nod.
“Silver Castle, go!” Mach Windy shouted, and the leaguers dispersed with the determination of a thousand suns.
“Then a ghoul appeared” said Magnum Ace.
“A ghoul” repeated slowly Laura. Ruri was looking at him with a furrowed brow and the vacant stare of a person trying to understand how to stage an intervention against a dear friend.
“Yes, a ghoul. That. Stole the hat of the witch. That stole the ball of the Bowling Twins” Magnum Ace recounted.
Edmundo was standing in a corner, face turned away from the tragedy unfolding in the room, and was softly thunking his head against the wall.
The tanks housing the sharks were so big the aquarium and the giant equipment for their support occupied a whole floor. The corridor running all around the circular tank was bathed in blue light and painted in blue and azure tones. At the start of the circle a small gift shop, mainly consisting of three tables loaded with merchandise, sat demurely. “Whoah, look at them!” Topjoy squealed pressing his face against the glass. A bull shark, roughly three meters in length, swam lazily observing her kingdom. Bull armor eyed warily the other three occupants. “They have many teeth” he murmured. A chuffed noise suddenly tore them away from their gazing. An otter was standing in the middle of the corridor, raised on her hind legs, staring at them with her beady eyes. “There she is” muttered Bull Armor. “Maybe we can corner her?” whispered Topjoy. “It’s a circular corridor. I can chase her, then you catch her” whispered back Bull Armor. Topjoy hummed in agreement, then turned to the gift shop with a mischievous glint in his eyes. He plucked one of the red shirts on display and unfurled it in front of the footballer.
“Olè, toro!” he exclaimed, waiving it like a matador. “Oh you think you’re very funny, smarty pants” grumbled Bull Armor, turning his horns forward. Topjoy grinned and shimmied a little on his feet. Bull Armor harrumphed and started running in the opposite direction. Topjoy bobbed slightly on his legs and finally, inexorably, understood the error of his ways seeing an otter and a riled up football leaguer charging towards him.
The first thing that Juurota and Ryuken saw, upon entering the reptilarium, was white. High windows made the sunlight pour in and their eyes needed a moment to recalibrate. The second thing that they saw was many singular terrariums, hosting a variety of critters. Although this wing of the aquarium was called reptilarium, a wide variety of animals such as frogs and newts and bugs populated the enclosures. However a very specific one, tucked at the end of the room, captured their attention.
A small fountain was pouring water in a vat full of duckweed and one very happy otter. The animal, upon seeing them, suddenly dived down leaving a mustelid shaped hole in the plant cover.
“You are shitting me” cursed Juurota. “Language” answered reflexively Ryuken. “I mean” he said, catching himself. “We’ll never catch her under all that green”
The other leaguer fixed him a glare and unsheathed his bokken. “I can stop the water flowing, and you will catch the otter in the hole left by the absence of currents” he said, adjusting his grip on the weapon. Ryuken nodded and close his eyes. The crest on his forehead light up and when he opened them the meek nana of the group was replaced with the most fearsome and swift karateka the leagues ever saw. They both encroached the vat and in a moment the floor was covered in the water splashed in the impact and a very angry otter was held in the hands of Ryuken. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!” he exclaimed amidst the yells and growls of the animal.
“See? Going back to the mountains is good” Juurota said putting the bokken back into his sheath.
Ryuken stuck out his tongue at him.
Mach Windy paced back and forth in front of the penguin’s tank. This was terrible. He could already feel the weight of Edmundo’s disappointed gaze and the crushing heartbreak of Ruri after they were all permanently banned from the aquarium and, consequently, all further international trips.
Well, not everyone. Surely she could still mill about, discovering the world, but they wouldn’t be invited gallivanting ever again.
He sighed and cranked his neck.
How did that even happen?!
One moment they were quietly enjoying the aquarium, a moment later they were roped in a wild dogcatcher chase. Or, well, otter.
In that moment, he spotted her. The otter slipped through a vent on the ceiling and dived in the giant open tank below, a low and wide tub that housed a half dozen of stingrays. But none of that bothered the little critter, who was splashing around at her heart’s content. He slowly turned and started stalking towards the tank. He was in the middle of a very important triangle. Behind him, the penguin tank. In front of him, the stingrays’ tub. Then, last but not least, the third point was the most important of all: the exit. His gaze darted from the door to the otter, who was now munching on a fish piece that one of the rays left un-eaten.
“Windy! We found them!”
Topjoy was running towards him with a very discombobulated and annoyed otter in his arms, wrapped in a red shirt. Behind him Bull Armor, Juurota and Ryuken were also shouting.
Mach Windy looked at the otter.
The otter looked at Mach Windy.
The mustelid soared through the water, mimicking a surface to air missile, and ran towards the exit.
“No!” yelled the soccer player, hot on his tail.
If the otter managed to get outside they will never catch it again, then Ruri and Edmundo will be arrested for property damage and animal endangerment, and they will be banned from entering Italy ever again, and they will lose their connection to their beautiful culture, and it will be all his fault!
GZ opened the door.
He saw his fellow teammates running towards him. He heard the cacophony of screams that bounced off the walls. He felt a brush of fur on his greaves.
He dropped the lunch packages and his knees on the ground and caught the otter like a puck. He looked at the small ball of rage in his hands and at his astonished teammates.
“Where the fuck were you?!” Bull Armor yelled.
“Then. The princess couldn’t marry the prince. Because. She was in love. With. The prince’s knight”
Laura was listening intently, with her arms crossed and one leg propped forward. “Hu hu” she said, looking straight at Edmundo, who was intently counting the number of leaves on the fake plants on the ceiling. There were 5 873 of them, fascinating!
“We’re here!” yelled Mach Windy bursting through the door.
“Oh thanks Joe di Maggio” wheezed Magnum Ace folding unto himself and putting his hands on his knees.
“We uh. We have your otters” the leaguer said, much more meekly now that the stares of the three humans were focused on him. The rest of the team shuffled in behind him, with Topjoy at the very tail end.
“Happy?” he said, proffering a mustelid.
All of Silver Castle was kneeling in the external courtyard, while Edmundo and Ruri were apologizing profusely to Luca.
“Just send us the invoice when the work is finished. And if you need it, Silver Castle will do a full advertising campaign free of charge” Edmundo said.
“We will let you know” said Luca in a clipped tone.
Bull Armor kept looking at Edmundo, Ruri, Luca, Laura and then Edmundo again. It was him, when you actually got down to it, who actually broke the glass. He felt a stereo bump on his pauldron. He looked at his right and Topjoy winked at him. He smiled.
“Ok platoon, we’re moving!” announced Edmundo clapping his hands.
The leaguers shuffled out of the courtyard and walked back towards the bus, where Meckel was loading some colorful paper bags.
“Oh, you guys are early!” he exclaimed. “I’ll tell you on the way back” sighed Edmundo. “And where were you?!” exclaimed Ruri. “I was buying coffee!” Meckel replied, showing a red bad with “La Vazza” written on it.
“What’s wrong with the coffee we have at home?” she asked climbing on the vehicle.
“What right with the coffee we have at home” he muttered rolling his eyes.
Ruri watched the aquarium disappear in the back window of the bus with sad eyes. She couldn’t even see the sharks. The radio was playing softly an Italian song whose meaning couldn’t be parsed.
Stai qui con me, nell’acquario di Cattolica, dove ho trovato la mia essenza più ecologica
She heightened her gaze and met the concerned faces of her team.
“We’re sorry, Owner” said Bull Armor. A chorus of “we’re sorry” followed his apology. She sighed, then smiled. “Guys, I couldn’t stay mad at you even if I tried. It was an accident, and we fixed the situation with the aquarium staff. There will be other aquarium trips, I promise!”
Edmundo looked at the players through the rearview mirror. “Ruri is right. We can go when we’ll be home. There’s a pretty big one, with dugongs, if I’m not wrong”
“What’s a dugong?” piped up Topjoy.
“A giant underwater cow”
“Woooooooooooooow!”
Ruri chuckled and watched the streets fly past by.
Tutta la costa sta piangendo nel mare, quelle frecce nel cielo le faranno atterrare proprio qui