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All the Words I Never Said

Summary:

You always believed every story deserved an ending.
You dated Atsumu Miya in high school. You broke up.
You met Sakusa Kiyoomi years later. You weren’t supposed to fall for him.
You thought you were done with love stories.
But when the past shows up wearing a volleyball jersey and the future knocks on your door in black compression sleeves, you’re left rewriting everything, one page at a time.
Not every love story needs a happy ending, just an honest one.

Chapter 1: Familiar Strangers

Chapter Text

November 17th 2018 – Ariake Arena, Tokyo

 

The match had just ended, the players were jogging off the court, drenched in sweat as their uniform clinged to their skin while the loud cheering of the winning team's fans echoed through Ariake Arena. 

But you weren’t really paying attention to any of that no matter how overstimulating it sounded.

 Your focus was on the half-crumbled list of interview questions clenched in your hand, mentally preparing them like a mantra as anxiety buzzed through your skin. Your boss assigned you to write an article about The MSBY Black Jackals for Tokyo Sports magazine and the weight of delivering your job perfectly started to feel heavy on your shoulders.

To be frankly honest, you didn’t have that much interest in volleyball or sports in general, you only took the job of being an editor for Tokyo sports magazine because you needed some money to put a roof over your head and food on your table. Writing was your real love, books and poetry, anything that gave your thoughts a place to go to, anything that can get you to show off your skills. 

Editing players' Interviews wasn’t feeding your soul enough but it still was writing, it was enough… At least for now.

“The Black Jackals are leaving the court, shouldn’t we go before people start crowding them?” said your coworker, Nagi, who was trying to figure out a way to leave the crowd and go to the press area. 

You nodded, your grip tightening on the already crumpled paper of questions in your hand. You two arrived late to the match, Traffic, a typical problem from living in a big city like Tokyo, so you didn’t even catch the start of the game. Heck you don’t even know who the players are apart from Bokuto Koutarou, your friend back from College introduced you once and you guys still meet up from time to time when he wasn’t travelling across the country for games.  

As you followed your co-worker through the crowd, walking past sponsors, press, and buzzing fans waving signs. The noises, the bodies, the flashing cameras, it was all too much.

“Hey, I was just talking with MSBY managers and they said they could set us up for an interview with their setter” Nagi returned breathless, after he disappeared for a few moments and left you confused in the press zone. 

“Great, That will do, we’re running short on time anyways” you said as you pulled out your notebook and a pen from your bag.

 And as you followed him, approaching the players area, you weren’t that much focused on your surroundings, but you felt slightly stressed because of the atmosphere, the pounding in your ears wasn’t just from the noises that filled the Arena, it was mixed with the familiar panic of the looming deadline, social interaction and the overwhelming feeling to look like you know what you’re doing. .

You continued re-reading the questions in the paper, your eyes skimmed through the words Before-

“Y/n?”

The familiar voice hit you like a punch as you lifted your head and there you saw him.

Atsumu. Atsumu Miya, your first love, your highschool sweetheart and your worst heartbreak.

He stood a few feet away from you, with his golden hair sticking to his sweaty forehead, a stunned, familiar softness grew on his handsome face when you two locked eyes. And your heart skipped a beat for a second before an awkward half-smile tugged in on your lips.

“Tsumu… You're the setter?” You asked, immediately regretting letting those dumb and obvious words leave your mouth.  

‘Of course he’s the setter, have you seen his uniform, idiot? ’ you cursed yourself mentally as you continued to stare at him up and down.

“Ahaha.. Yes I am.. You're The one interviewing me?” He also asked awkwardly as he rubbed the back of his neck, a faint hint of blush grew on his face and you didn’t know whether it was out of embarrassment or if it’s because of the match.

“Yes…umm, I’m going to do your interview” You nodded, gripping your pen tightly

 Gosh this whole thing was so awkward you wanted to dig a hole in the ground and disappear, you avoided eye contact with him as much as possible terrified of what you might see in his beautiful brown eyes: nostalgia, regret, maybe even hope. The same awkward weight filled the space just like how it once used to back then.

 

June 10th 2013, Inarizaki High school

 

The early summer breeze creeped in through the open window, stirring the pages of the book in your hand, the faint shouts of the baseball team could be heard from the window of your classroom, the air was thick with chatter and teenage noises, as your gaze was focused on the novel in your hand.

“Look, there he is,” a soft whisper from your female classmate who was sitting right behind somehow registered and broke through the noises and you found yourself lifting your head to look out of curiosity and there he was.

Atsumu Miya. Loud, smug and far too comfortable entering someone else’s classroom. As always, he smacked the back of his twin brother’s head, earning a half-hearted yell in return. He wasn’t even in your class but he was a regular visitor since his twin brother Osamu and his friend Suna were your classmates. 

“Jeez, he’s so handsome up close like this” a girl whispered 

“I know, it’s a shame that his hair will never know what a toner is,”  her friend giggled.

You rolled your eyes.

The Miya twins were always the centre of attention. Of course how can they not be when they were this loud, charismatic and utterly exhausting, it was times like these when you wish you had bought up your headphones so that you can drown out the flirting and the yelling.

With a sigh, you closed your book and stood up, slipping it under your arm as you made your way to the door. Lunch break was your time to breathe in the middle of the exhausting school day and you’d be damned if you’d let a bunch of teenage boys ruin your Midday reading.

 The storage room behind the volleyball court in your school was calling your name, it was your usual hideout spot whenever you needed somewhere peaceful to write, nap, read or just to escape people.  .

As you passed the boys, your eyes met Atsumu’s for the briefest second.

Something flicked, was it curiosity? Irritation? You couldn’t tell. Whatever it was, it passed as quickly as you walked out of the room.

“Why is that girl always leaving the room whenever I come in?” Asked Atsumu as his eyes never left your figure that was slowly disappearing in the distance.

“Dunno, she always leaves at random moments like this” said Osamu, barely looking up from his game card. “Oi, Rin stop shoving those cards up your ass!!”

‘Rude’ Atsumu thought in his head as he kept watching the door, the faint memory of that weirdly tense eye contact looping in his mind for another beat before he got back to teasing his brother.